(no music) (10 hours) BABBLING ON | Let me bore your pain away #38 | Jason Newland | 13th June 2025

Hello and welcome to Jason Newland.com My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. This is Let Me Bore Your Pain Away and I'm here with little Vinny, little Vinny Andre Newland.

He's cuddled up by my side. For some reason he hasn't touched his dinner or his breakfast yet. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure if he realizes it's there because he's been in bed. He was in bed all night. Then he got up and I took him out for a WALK.

Then I came back and he went back to bed again. And now he's got up again. It's about half 10 in the morning.

It's Friday the 13th of June 2025. So as it's Friday the 13th, it'd be I think quite a good thing to talk about stupidstitions. I mean superstitions.

I call it stupidstitions but superstitions. And ultimately mindset I guess isn't it is what we expect. So I'm incredibly pleased with myself for coming up with stupidstitions.

Although I might not have come up with it. I might have heard it someplace. That's the problem with being so highly educated.

I might have read it in one of my millions of novels that I've looked at. Imagine if I'd read every book I bought. I'd have a vocabulary.

I can't even spell the word vocabulary. I mean I know roughly how it's spelt. But I don't know how many L's or how many R's.

I think it's two L's. Might be one L. Might be two R's. I don't know how many uh vocabulary yeah I don't know how many F's there are.

But oh well really you know what Vinny's been there's this fly but it's not like the other flies. It's literally it's settling. So he's been following a fly trying to catch a fly for it's not been in the room for years.

I mean it's probably different flies. The problem is there was a big gap there wasn't there. He doesn't know what to do if the fly just stays there.

There's a fly on my right knee right now. I'm moving my knee fly's still there. That's an unusual thing isn't it.

I think the fly's injured. Or it just doesn't care. Vinny's inches away and he won't do anything because the fly because he's moved towards a fly and a fly stays there.

He doesn't know what to do with that. Do you? Look there's a fly Vinny. Look.

Nope. He's got no interest. If the thing won't fly away he won't chase it.

It's that strange it's almost like he's sulking now. Not the fly um the Vinny. He won't even look at me.

He's looking away. Vinny. Vinny.

Nope. He just flies away. Just completely blanking me.

He's still cuddling me but he's just nope. Doesn't. There's no acknowledge of me at all.

Yet that fly is still on my right knee. Still now even after all that. I don't normally let flies just get cozy on me.

But I'm kind of fascinated with what's going on. So I think this. I think the fly's got issues flying because it's really moving his wings around a lot.

But it definitely can fly. So I don't know what's going on. Maybe it's a baby.

I think it might be a baby fly because it is small. It's not a big fly. It's a really really small fly.

But not a small fly but a small big fly. That makes sense. Because you know you've got some flies that are small.

Some flies are big. But big flies aren't born big are they? They become big. And small flies are not probably born as big as they were then.

They have to grow don't they? So they were even smaller. But this fly is just. A lot of movement.

A lot of movement for a fly. I want to say it's on my knee. It's not on my actual flesh.

My flesh wow. It's a bit weird. That's a weird word isn't it? Flesh.

It's not on my actual knee. It's not on the bone. Flesh.

It's not on my skin. Because I've got you know got to wear clothes. Vinny's still ignoring it.

And that fly's ignoring me and Vinny. Oh well I'm just going to leave it. Oh it's flying off now.

Now it's on the left knee again. It's come back. So I think it's just a baby bee.

Baby bee. A baby fly. It's just come in.

And I don't know what it's up to. Sometimes focusing on the most mundane things can actually be useful. In a weird way.

To take your mind off of stuff. To redirect your thoughts. So this is.

I think this is going to be one of those. Let me bore your pain away recordings. Where I perhaps don't really stick to a subject.

But the bottom line or the tester. The tester is. Is it useful? Do you feel different at the end of the recording.

To how you felt before the recording. You know in a positive way. Do you feel more relaxed? Maybe you already feel more relaxed.

Maybe. Your mind just starts to slow down. And that focus that perhaps you had before.

Maybe focusing on one part of your body. That you didn't want to focus on. It's like one of those things.

The more you try not to focus on something. The more you seem to focus. I mean if you meet someone.

I mean it's just natural human nature. If someone says to you. Oh.

I was going to introduce you to my dad. Or I'm going to introduce you to my girlfriend or whatever. And but I just need to warn you.

Please don't stare. And say why? Why? They say. Oh because they've got a swastika on their forehead.

A tattoo. So please don't stare. You can't help it.

You're going to stare. It amazes me. How you know.

You see. I see people with like. Really.

God I don't know why. If you ever saw someone with really bright green hair. Really bright bright green hair.

And. Pink glasses. What else do they wear.

Do they wear like. Yeah they were dressed as. What was it like.

You know those. Remember the French. Aristocrats with the.

I don't know if we had them in this country as well. With the big puffy white wig things. And they had white makeup on.

And I guess that's white face isn't it. Why. And they'd have a handkerchief.

And they'd be all fluffy clothes. And I mean. Yeah I'd be talking about that.

And very high aristocratic people. And they. I'm guessing if they if they were in France they were probably here as well.

Because. You know. France is led the way in fashion isn't it.

So I'm guessing probably in that time. Vinnie. You all right mate.

How come your belly's wet. Have you done a little wee wee dribble. Or was it me.

No it's me. And this person was wearing that stuff. Really really really baggy trousers.

But fluffy at the bottom. And. It looked like they had a parachute on.

Their back. It wasn't open. So you know I'd be able to.

I wouldn't say it looks like if they had a parachute open. It was like they had a parachute. But it looked like a. I mean it might just been a backpack with a tent inside or something.

But it was. A big backpack. It did look.

And it had a little cord. Admittedly that might just been. Just.

Because it had a lot of zips. Maybe that was just the cord for the main zip. To make it a little bit easier to open the bag.

So it might not have had anything. I mean it might have added that little cord on. Because it was fluffy.

It was like quite felty. That makes sense. And shredded.

So it was I don't know it's very very artistically done. And. These boots that were huge huge boots.

And. They had. I don't know what they was inside.

I'm almost like. Metal underneath the boots. Because it was cracking the pavement.

Like not that sounds more like sucking the pavement doesn't it. But really really really like that. And.

I remember I looked at them. I said what are you looking at. It's like.

You. I can't help it. So if you don't want people to look at you don't.

If I go outside. And I wear shorts. And if I wore a t-shirt that only went down to.

Just above my belly button. Right. You know it stopped at my belly button.

I don't know what kind of t-shirts they are. I've never had one. But I've seen them.

I can't really moan at people. For staring. You know it's like.

You're staring because you're supposed to stare. It's it's hard not to. You know it's human nature to look at weird things.

And my belly is a weird thing. It's one of the way the wonders of the world. That flies just land on my hand and I don't like it anymore.

I don't like it landing on my flesh. It's very cocky. It's very cocky fly.

Very arrogant. Or fearless. I mean arrogance and fearlessness may be.

You know quite close cousins I guess in some ways. You know that field of indestructibility. A feeling of no one can hurt me.

I'm too important. Yeah. I think that's what the fly is doing.

I'm not sure. I'll tell you another thing that calms me down. Turning off the news.

Honestly. Sometimes I'll have the news on and I'll be watching it. I turn it off.

I turn the TV off. And I listen. There's nothing.

And there's not always nothing. Sometimes a bit of activity. But right now I can hear the birds in the trees.

Vinny's jittery. But he's lying comfortably. He's calm.

But he's occasionally like. He senses. He has like a spider sense.

Or Jack Russell sense of a fly. The fly is teasing him. The weird thing is I don't know where it is.

I can't hear it. It's not big enough to hear. The fly.

You know because big flies. You can hear them coming. This is not.

It's not big enough. Like it's almost. Auditarily invisible.

And that contrast to turn the television off after watching the news. And hearing the peacefulness of. Relative silence really.

I can hear a faint. A faint sound of a train. I'm not near a train track.

But I'm not far away from a train track. If that makes sense. I mean I could.

I could get to the train track. 10 minutes. I could walk to the train track.

Five. Maybe 15 minutes. I'm just thinking it is.

But it's. It's. It's a very.

It's quite a clear area. Because it's fields. So that.

The musical sound of the trains. Whizzing by. Do kind of echo through the fields a bit.

But it's quite faint. I don't know why. But they tend to.

Beat their horns at night. The trains. Why would they do it at night? I never really understood that.

Lots of things I didn't understand. I was watching a. Deal or no deal. The very last five minutes of the program.

On TV. Yesterday. And they don't have the big money anymore.

They used to have like 250 grand. I think the highest they go up to. I think it's 125 now.

Which is I don't understand why it's less money. When 20 years ago it was twice as much. You'd think with inflation it'd be like a million.

But it's not. In fact it might 100 grand might be the top one. I'm not sure.

But it's definitely not 250 grand anymore. I mean that's part of the reason of watching it. It's just.

Most of them don't win anything. Or they don't win much. And I can't remember if I ever saw anyone win the full amount.

I might have done. Because I used to win a lot of money. I used to watch it every day.

20 years ago. I used to watch it with my Nan on a Friday. I used to love watching that with her.

Guaranteed. Get a phone call. You know.

And it would just be. Coming up to the very last bit. You know the last 10 minutes of the show.

And my Dad had a phone. And my Nan was like. Oh your Dad's on the phone.

He wants to talk. I said no. I'll call you back after this finishes.

And she'd get annoyed with me. And I said. She said you can't put television first.

Before you foil your family. I said OK. I understand that.

But. What's the point. In spending 50 minutes watching a program.

Or 55 minutes watching something. Where the whole. Thing is building towards the last little bit.

And then we don't watch the last little bit. What's the point in that. There's no point.

There's no point in the. The watching of it. If you're not going to get to see the end.

And she said. You do what I say in my house. Now get on that phone.

And speak to your Daddy. And I said no. I'm 42 years old now.

You can't tell me what to do. And she said. And I said what's that.

She said oh wow. I'm so furious. And I said doesn't matter.

Don't care. And I stuck my tongue out. I did.

And I ran. I ran out of the house. And I thought you know what.

I'm going to go back. I went back. I tapped on the window.

The living room window. She looked at me. And I looked through the glass.

And I just. I went like this. Did a raspberry.

None of that happened. Why am I telling. Why am I saying this stuff.

The bit that did happen though is. There'd be phone calls. And I never realized why.

Why would always phone me. Just at that time. Because he lived in the same town as her.

And I was visiting from a different town. I found out. One day when I was in the toilet.

I went in the toilet during a break. And I heard him on the phone to my dad. Son.

Grandson's here. She didn't talk like that. But she was very posh.

Hello son. Just let you know that your son. My grandson is here.

No I don't want you to wait. Till he comes out of the toilet. But if you can please phone.

About five minutes. In five minutes time. So we can completely ruin.

The television experience. Of deal or no deal for him. And then we can all have a good laugh.

About it when he's gone. Is that okay? Thank you son. All the best.

Ta ta. And of course. I thought.

I can't believe this. So all these years. She's been phoning him.

And letting him know. I mean not phone. He's his son.

She can of course phone him. But phone him to let him know. That I was here.

Like. I'm watching deal or no deal. Get your priorities right.

Hmm. Now I realize some people. Might not agree with my.

Interpretation of what's important. And it's not like. One thing's more important than the other.

It's just. What is it? It's there's no point. Watching the whole show.

And then missing the last bit. There isn't. Especially when it happens.

Every single Friday. Like no. No.

That was 20 years. 20. Blimey.

21 years ago. 21 years ago today. It's 21 years ago today.

Ooh ooh ooh. Is it 21 seconds ago. Just 21 seconds ago.

21 seconds ago. That was an amazing song. What was that? Early 2000s.

And one by one. Like every single one of them. Left the group to go to prison.

It was weird. And there was about 40. 40 of them in the group.

Which meant. No one was making any money. I'm pretty sure I got to number one.

It was a big hit. But even then. You're not going to make much money.

Because it has to be split. All those ways. It's like.

I wouldn't be lucky. If they came out of 10 grand each. 21 seconds ago.

21 seconds ago. What's with the balaclavas? Come on. I know someone has got a picture of her boyfriend.

It's a picture of someone that she's a fan of. On her phone. And she showed me.

And it's a picture of a bloke. In a balaclava. It could be anybody.

It could literally be anybody. How are you supposed to know. That that's the person.

That you like. He's wearing a black balaclava. You literally cannot see his face.

You can't even see all of his eyes. It'd be different if you could kind of see the eyes. And you know.

Maybe you could see the lips. And maybe the nose. The ears.

But you can't see any of that. It's literally covered. And it's.

You can see a little bit the eyeballs. And. That's pretty much it.

For some reason. Vinny. Mr Jolte.

It's weird. Because he keeps. Going to bite something that isn't there.

So that fly must be moving really fast. And I think it's frustrating him. I think if anything.

He's a little bit embarrassed. Because it's happening to him. And he's seen me looking.

And he's a little bit embarrassed to have that happen. I'll put my glasses on. My eyes are feeling a bit strained.

That's better. It's not a difference. I might just suppose if I open my eyes.

Maybe. Yeah. It'd be better.

Yeah. I do need to get my eyes tested. So you might be thinking.

What's balaclavas? And. Very colourful clothing. And flies on my knees.

And. Watching Deal or No Deal. Turning the news off.

And listening to the birds singing. And the trees. How far away the train track is.

What's that got to do with. Anything. Which is a valid.

It is a valid question. It's a valid question. But.

It could be a distraction. And I say. I've been doing this for a while now.

And you can notice how you feel. And the idea. It's not a secret really.

The idea is for you to feel better. Afterwards than you did before. And to also.

Feel better. Feel different. Feel more relaxed.

Feel more comfort. Physical comfort. In your body.

During. And afterwards. Than you did before.

You decided to listen to my squeaky voice. That is. The overall aim.

Of. Well I could say 100% of my recordings I make. Whether it's for chronic pain.

Whether it's for relaxation. Whether it's for stress relief. Whether it's for stop smoking.

Whether it's for. Nail biting. Whatever it is I'm doing.

The idea is do you feel better at the end of it. At the very. At the very minimum.

That's the least. That I aim for. The very least.

I'm not aiming for the least. But I'm saying that's the. The worst case scenario is you feel more relaxed.

You might be annoyed. You might know I've just wasted my time listening to that. Weird man.

But at the same time. How do you feel? Because I realized that sometimes listening to me. It won't.

Seem like. I'm just gonna. Potentially it might.

Feel as though I'm just very unprofessional. And I'm just talking absolute. Rubbish.

Bollards as I like to say. And there's an argument. To say that you're correct.

In that assumption. But then you think well why am I. Doing this. Why am I making this recording.

What is my aim. What is my goal. And then how do you feel.

Different from how you felt before. And you're the only one. That can really.

Answer that question. You know that I'm being very serious and very solemn and very. All taking myself seriously right now because I said.

Answer instead of answer. Which is what I normally say. You're I'm going to say answer now so you can answer that question.

You're the only one. That knows how you feel. And sometimes it can be a bit of a surprise possibly.

Even a shock. To the system. To feel different.

And not know why. It might even be a little bit annoying. You know it's like.

I remember I've heard people say to me. I don't I don't get it. How come I feel different now.

How come I feel better. I've just listened to you talking absolute bollocks. For an hour.

Which I would obviously I would never say normally a naughty word like that. Listen to. And.

It's like yeah well. It's the end result that matters isn't it. So if you got if you let's say if you got a puncture in your dinghy.

Right. I don't know anyone that's even got a dinghy. I don't know why I'm talking about dinghies.

But like a rubber dinghy. Something really weird happened just then. This is really weird.

I'm sorry it just distracted me. I feel he's like trying to catch this fly. So he's like jumping up and snapping his feet together.

His feet is his jaws together. It just did it. But it aimed it at me.

And we ended up being face to face. Like literally probably about. Five inches away maybe.

We just stared at each other. He looked embarrassed. And he's looked at me like.

For way too long. And then he just turned and went and sort of. Laid back down.

So it's almost like the fly is flying to me. And he tried to follow it. And he ended up just staring at me.

He had to be there. It was it was funny. I don't know why.

It was just it was his look of embarrassment. I'm sure he probably he might not even have that. The ability to be embarrassed.

But I know he does. I've seen it too often. I know it's like oh we're putting human emotions onto an animal.

I don't know. I've seen they it's like okay so for animals dogs don't have emotions no okay right. We've never met a dog then.

If you never spent enough time with a dog. If you think dogs don't have emotions. Wow do they have emotions.

He sulks. He gets angry. He is playful.

He's in a good mood sometimes. Sometimes he's in a grumpy mood. He's yeah or he tries to boss me around.

He's got loads of emotions. He's a funny old chap. And he's got a lot of freedom with me.

Because I just let him be however he is. Regardless of how annoying it sometimes is. If he's being naughty.

But I just let him I let him express himself however he wants to. So if he's in a bad mood and he's being grumpy and snappy. I'll just leave him alone.

Let him be like that. He's a funny old fella. I realised I saw a dog similar dog to him 15 years old.

And I thought when he's 15 I'll be 66. We will literally be pensioners together. We'll be old men.

Two old men walking along together. I just hope one of us can find the way home. Maybe.

I wonder which one I'll be walking the slowest. Because I he likes to walk slow now. And I've always walked slow.

I'm just a slow walker. But he loves to just one of the things he likes to do. I mean he does like to run around.

He's got a long lead and he runs around. I can't let him off the lead. But he likes to sniff the grass the ground which I know a lot of dogs do.

And it happily. I think it's sometimes he's got a bit of a temper. He'd happily just spend an hour.

Just sniffing around one little bit of grass. Or just walking around the field or the park. Just sniffing bits and bobs.

And he's happy doing that. Just that's just what he likes to do. You did it again.

You went and snapped again. And he ended up staring at me. I don't know.

I don't know why it's funny. But that bit there when he ended up like right close to my face. Just staring at me.

He knows I'm talking about him now as well. The reason I know is because his ear wiggles. Whenever I know he's talking about him his ear wiggles.

If I say. Vinny. Vinny.

Are you listening Vinny? I know you are. Wiggle your ear if you're listening to me. Wiggle your ear if you're listening to me Vinny.

Okay I'll be specific. Wiggle your right ear if you're listening to me. Okay I'll try another way.

He likes to do the opposite to what I tell him or what I ask him. So don't wiggle your right ear Vinny. Keep your right ear completely still.

Don't move your right ear. So now he knows that I want him to, see he knows what I'm doing. Oh his right ear is floppy now.

Don't move your right ear. I think he just farted. It wasn't as one a big gush of air.

It was like a real, real kind of easy, an easy release. A very slow release. Like.

Like that. The fly's back on my left leg now. Now if you find these recordings completely pointless please do let me know.

Because you know it's not, well if you like them please let me know. Because I know people listen to them. Every time I make them, people listen.

And I think from a perspective of, I think a lot of therapists and a lot of people that make recordings. So I know this is on a podcast but to me every recording I do is an individual recording. And I was doing recordings before I was making podcasts.

So I was making audio recordings long before I even knew what a podcast was. And only a short time after podcasts started and before podcasts became popular. Yes, I'm the reason they became popular.

No. But you know I was doing podcasts 2006. I was doing recordings 2006.

And I think I started adding them to a podcast maybe end of 2006 to 2007. But I was making recordings. I'm not sure why I started.

What was I talking about? There was, there was a, there was a point to this what I'm saying. But I think what I was trying to say is, what I do is very different from what anyone else does. It doesn't mean there's no one else, I mean there might be some people copying me now.

But I don't, I doubt it. I don't think anyone would listen to me and think, you know what? I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna do exactly what he does.

And very unlikely. I wouldn't even copy me. So I don't think anyone else would.

But I do something different. I don't think it's better or worse. It's probably worse.

Probably were a hell of a lot worse than everyone else maybe. But for some people, it will be a lot better. For some people, listening to my voice, no matter what I talk about, helps you to release tension and stress from your body.

Almost instantly causes your mind to start to slow down and your body to relax. And when your body relaxes, all of your body relaxes, not just parts of it. When your hands relax, your knees relax, your shoulders relax, your back relaxes, your chest and breasts and your stomach relax, your buttocks, your groin relax, your hands, your arms, your spine, your face, your eyes, your jaw, your nose, your mouth, your tongue, your lips on your face, your hair, your knees, your calves, your shins, your thighs, the tops of your thighs, the sides of your thighs, the backs of your thighs, your inner thighs, the same with your arms.

You've got the backs of your arms, upper arms, you've got the front of your upper arms, the biceps, you've got the sides and you've got the bottom or the back of them, your armpits. I don't know why it's called armpits. It just seems to be, I know it's like the end of the arm, but pits.

That's never used as a good word, isn't it? Someone says, oh, how is the wedding cake or is the pits? No, they would take that as an insult. It was just the pits. But what's wrong with armpits? It's just another part of the body.

I mean, why, why, why is it a negative word? I don't understand it. It's also part of the body that's ignored in relaxation recordings I've found. The armpits, there's a few parts of the body that are ignored.

So there's the armpits, that's one. What other parts? Sometimes the elbows are just ignored. Or the, I guess the elbow pits, you know, the bit in the middle where your arm bends.

I bit. And the equivalent on your legs, you know, opposite your knees. That bit underneath there.

It's doing it again, trying to catch that little fly. And also you've got, you know, sometimes with a relaxation session, the focus on the, you know, the back of the neck. Because for me, that is a place that does have a tendency to need relaxing.

Then you've got the front of the neck. To me, that's kind of broken into two different parts, because you've got the front of the neck, which would be the muscles of the neck. But then inside is the throat.

So there's the muscles of the throat. But part of the neck that is quite often almost ignored in my experience of listening to relaxation recordings is the sides of the neck, which is just as important as the back of the neck. It's also a part that needs or could benefit from feeling calm.

Then there's the scalp. So you've got, you know, from your top of your forehead upwards. I mean, technically, your forehead is part of your scalp, isn't it? It is, isn't it? So the forehead, I mean, it used to be like, oh, your scalp is kind of the hairline, but my scalp has grown or shrunk, actually.

You could say it's shrunk because there's less hairline. So my scalp has actually shrunk, but it hasn't. So the scalp is the forehead.

And it's pretty much the whole of the head, isn't it? You know, the idea is just on top, which is that just that bit on top, where I used to have hair, just that bit, that's the scalp, the whole thing's the scalp, the sides, the back, the sides behind the ears, that's all part of scalp. Anywhere that feels, you can feel it. It's there.

It's all the way down to your neck. It's all the way down to your eyebrows, your forehead. So it's quite a large area, really.

And of course, it's there to protect us. It's nature's own head guard, really, isn't it, I suppose, her own helmet. It's really weird, the word helmet was hilarious when I was about 12.

It was the funniest word in the world, helmet. We still use it as a term like stop being such a helmet for years. Not as funny now.

I don't know. I haven't been called a helmet for quite a while. But focusing on the scalp, which is such a large part of the head, really, the scalp and the brain.

The rest is just a few bits and bobs in it. You got your jaw. You know, if you if you like think of it from a perspective of what the head is made of.

There's the ears, the eyes. And then you got your jaw. Everything else is just bits added on, isn't it? And the jaws kind of added on.

The nose is added on. Yeah, so it's kind of the weird thing about it is that whole area protects a part of your body, the brain, which has no pain. Which I think causes confusion when it comes to things like headaches.

Because we feel that there's a pain inside our head, but there isn't. It can't be physically impossible to have a pain in the head, in the brain rather. You know, let's say in the middle, there's no pain sensors there.

It just feels like this, you know, I'm not saying that the person's not feeling because they are feeling stuff. But there are no pain sensors in the brain. Like, literally, scientifically, factually, not saying for the sake of it.

Well, there must be no, no, there really isn't. There's no pain sensors in the brain. Yet the brain produces pain, ironically, and pleasure, and comfort.

And all the other feelings we have comes from the brain. Can you hear him? He's so fidgety today. Why are you so damn ish fidgety? Fidgetity, hey Vin? He still hasn't had his breakfast.

I don't know why. So in a way, really, if you think about it, phantom limb pain is almost the same as having, in some ways, I'm not saying it's the same, but in some ways, it's a similar thing to having a feeling that you've got a pain in the middle of your head. Because you can't have a pain in your leg that's not there.

So obviously, that's, or your arm, just say arm, leg, whatever limb it is. You can't physically have a pain in that part of the body. You know, because it's not there.

It's just obvious. So it's a brain thing. Was that an uncomfortable pause? I like to leave little pauses like that sometimes.

So is he gonna talk again? Is he finished? Is he just gone to make a sandwich? What's what's going on? So I'm thinking one of the things with phantom limb pain that I realized a long time ago, 19 years ago, is the first thing you do, don't tell someone that they're, you know, if someone comes in, and they've lost an arm, don't tell them that they haven't got an arm. They know that no one needs to be told that. It's the most ridiculous thing in the world to tell someone that it's like, you might think that's what I've already done just now, but it wasn't.

I was just pointing facts out. But in a sense of it's impossible for that arm to hurt. But it's not impossible for them to feel that pain in the arm.

It's a different thing. In the same way as we can feel lots of different things that aren't necessarily real. We can feel things that we don't know why we feel them.

I mean, why the heck would something as possibly pointless and absurd maybe as this recording cause you to feel relaxed. So how I view things like phantom limb pain is being respectful. Try and, I know perhaps I don't come across as very respectful and I do.

I am, I might just, I like to mess around and stuff, but ultimately treat that person's limb like it is there and relax it. Because they already know it's not there, right? You don't need to be told that they can see. With the brain, we can't see that there's no physical sensations in the brain because we can't see our brain, can we? Simple as that.

So it's a little bit difficult. It's more of a bit of a brain teaser, actually, excuse the pun. Because if you can't actually, if the brain has no physical senses, sensation, how can there be physical sensation or the experience of it from that part of the head? And it's a, it's a weird, I just find, I find a bit of a weird thing to even try and think about because it doesn't, logically, it doesn't make sense.

But that's possibly more to do with my lack of education, maybe. I just want a very basic perspective is where I come from. Uh, now that's not very scientific or particularly academic, but my opinion is, probably enough, not enough information to do a TED talk.

Thank you everyone. Bye. You know, I don't know if that would really go down too well.

Vinny just can't, he annoys me sometimes when he does this though, because if I'm doing a relaxation session, where I'm just really, now, focus on your knees, and relax, doing one of them. Having him jumping up and down all the time, it just, it's annoying. But that's me doing a sleep recording or a relaxation recording.

Now you must relax. Focus on your fingertails. That's not what I sound like.

That's me. That's my impression of myself. Wow.

I'm now caricaturing myself. I'm caricaturing a caricature of myself. I'll talk about caricatures.

When I was in Bulgaria, was in his club, pub, whatever it was, in the hotel. And there was this caricature man walking around, he wasn't a caricature, he was drawing caricatures. And he did my picture.

I was like, oh, okay, cool. And he did all of our pictures. There was about six of us in a group.

And we paid him the money and then just, you know. Later on, we thought, let's have a look at the pictures. It was quite dark, so you couldn't really see them very well.

They were literally the same. They were like the same picture. You could hardly distinguish between each picture.

He was just drawing the same picture every time. And some people might like, oh, I'll go over your money for that. Good money.

I just found hilarious. It's, you know, I'm not big caricatures. No, not for me.

Not really. Not for me. Because, you know, they do focus on, they make the bigger parts bigger.

Don't they? And the smaller parts smaller. So if you got small ears, they'll give you like microscopic ears. Or if you got large ears, they'll give you wings.

You know, that's that kind of thing. And I'm not, yeah, I'm not so into that. So, yeah, not really in caricature pictures.

It's not my ting. I know another part of the body which doesn't get focused on and I'm not being rude here. But the bum.

There's a lot of tension held in the bum. Sometimes. And the groin, like the bum, the groin, the, you know, that whole area, there could be a lot of tension kept in that part.

And I suppose what's called the privates for a reason, it's private, we shouldn't mention it. But actually, it's a really important part that needs relaxing sometimes. And I don't know, just it's hard to, hard to really focus on an area without it coming across as a bit weird, maybe.

But there's nothing weird about it. It's just a part of the body. It's no weirder than your toes, or your fingers, or your ears.

You know, it's just another part of the body, which produces whatever, you know, that's just there. It's just really, if you think about your, your private parts, like your, your groin and your bum and that. If you compare it to the rest of your body, all you're doing basically is the body is the land.

So if you got a big bit of land, let's say you got a mountain, it's the body's the mountain or the land and then you got the midsection of the body, which could be like a volcano. So I don't know how that works. But you know, I'm just what, if you're hungry, Vinnie, why don't you make your dinner instead of hunting a fly that you wouldn't even notice if you did eat it? Please don't eat it.

But if you did, it's so tiny, you wouldn't even mean that fly could fly into his mouth when he was yawning. And he wouldn't even know. Yeah, he's hunting it.

And not only is he hunting it, he's doing it in a very lazy way. He's just laying on the city with me, expecting it to come to him. That's a problem with this, this, this generation.

You ever hear that on the news or in newspapers or online, people moaning about this generation. Do you know what if Facebook had been around for the last 100 years, you could listen, you could watch videos, you could read Facebook posts from 100 years ago, 200 years ago, exactly the same. People in their 40s and 50s and 60s and 70s moaning about the young people.

Oh, they don't know. They don't have the discipline that we had. They don't do this.

They don't do that. They don't know. I heard the same things when I was a kid.

And my parents heard the same things when they were kids. And no doubt my grandparents heard the same things when they were kids. It's the standard thing.

People just moaning. You know, it's something I'll do. Do you ever hear someone say, always the music today is ridiculous.

It's rubbish. It wasn't like the 70s. Hasn't been a decent song since 1979.

Like really? I lived in the 70s. I was born 1970. So I had a full 10 years.

Nearly well, August 70. But you know, I had a decade nearly of living in the 70s. And admittedly, there was some great music.

But there was some proper stinkers. That really, I mean, they were scraping the barrel sometimes on top of the pops. Songs that really didn't go anywhere.

They were really I think the 70s at times was struggling a little bit. They just didn't know what they was, did they? Is it disco? Is it punk? Is it rock? What is it? Is it new romance? That's like the end of the 70s, early 80s. That's when it all kind of came together a bit.

Like the last five years of the 70s turned into the something different. Like was it the new romantic wave or whatever? And you had all the big bands of the early 80s. I suppose my favourite is probably the early 80s.

But just as from a childhood perspective. But just to say always never been any good song since whenever like, shut up your face. What are you talking about? That's just, that's just buying into getting old.

Just buying into old age like, I'm now an old fart. So I must, I'm going to stop liking music. That, you know, from a certain time, I can't like music that's from today.

Now, I refuse. You know, a survey was done a few years back, that very few people actually read a book once they leave school. But once they leave school, they don't read a book, not any book ever again.

Almost like the majority of people in the Western world would never read another book. And that's just wow. So you think if the only knowledge people get is from the news, from television, from the internet, that's the only information they get.

Or from other people. They can be very limited. It's almost, I think one of the things of reading is it kind of teaches you.

I don't know, it's, I don't know, I just, I think reading is useful. That's all. I'm just trying to think what I'm saying.

Does it help you to think for yourself? I think if you get enough different opinions, enough different viewpoints, you get to the point where you've got no other option than to think for yourself. Because it's much easier to have one viewpoint. You know, to live in a place where everyone pretty much thinks the same, believes the same stuff, has the same mannerisms, has the same, even the same sayings, you know, the same, just the same.

All individuals, but at the same time, very similar. Saying things like, no smoke without fire. That's one of the idiotic things that, wow.

So you're saying basically everyone's guilty till, that's it. If you're accused of something then you're guilty, yeah? No smoke without fire. Well, it depends what your class is.

Smoke bombs, that's not fire. And something can burn without being fire and cause smoke, can't it? I mean, I've overcooked, I've burnt food in the past, that's caused smoke, wasn't on fire, just burnt, burnt food. If you dropped a big massive 10 ton bag of flour on the floor, that's going to look like smoke.

You know, that's basically, and it might not be smoke, but it's going to look like smoke. So yeah, the whole idea of no smoke without, no, that's just ridiculous. I used to know somebody used to say that, it's like, it was hard because I was saying, you realise that's a really dumb saying.

Well, my parents used to say that. I said, well, you're calling my parents dumb? They said, no, saying dumb things doesn't mean someone's dumb. But that is a dumb saying.

It's just, if you've got any kind of brain power, you'd realise if you really look at the saying, then you'd know that it's the idea of saying no smoke without fire, that everybody, I mean, yeah, we're all guilty of something, I suppose, aren't we? But if someone gets accused of, I don't know, stealing the crown jewels, then they must be guilty. It's like, no, they might have accidentally, maybe they were drunk, they walked into the palace, didn't mean to, you know, perhaps they were looking for Burger King, and they just stumbled down some steps, walked

through the wrong door, and there you are, the crown, and all the prince, the king's jewels and stuff. So, and he thinks, oh, I'm at the Burger King, because that's the Burger King, isn't it? With a crown in that.

So he's thinking, I wonder what it's like to have the Burger King's crown. And then he thought, oh, maybe I remember they were giving stuff away, weren't they in Burger King, I didn't realise it'd be jewels, priceless jewels. So he just puts a crown on his head.

And he doesn't intend to take it home with him. But he thought he might as well just walk around town, giving it the biggin, you know, seeing if people treat him a bit more respectfully. He gets arrested.

Oh, automatically guilty. No. See, there's more to it.

It's just like, everyone trying to simplify everything. So yeah, that's it really. So how do you feel? I mean, some people, I am annoyed.

Keep talking about crown jewels being, oh, those crown jewels have been in the royal family for hundreds of years. How dare someone looking just for a burger, steal the crown jewels? It didn't really happen. It was just an analogy.

It was just a little story. Wasn't real, wasn't real. But he didn't talk about stupidstitions.

Yeah, I know, I did a whole recording on stupidstitions years ago. And it's in the same category as no smoke without fire. Or no good deed goes unpunished.

I mean, how negative is that? It's, come on, people. Let's just, I think there should be some kind of law. Just like, so we, we, we ban those sayings, just ban them.

Like no, they're now as bad as some of the other words that we're not allowed to say. So I was gonna say no, cannot say that. Wow, they'd have to have a whole, they'd have to build another thousand prisons in the country, just for people that use cliches.

Old sayings, things, just they say, I don't even know, they don't even think about what they're saying. I'm saying it because my father said it, my mother says it, and I'm just saying it. My friends say it.

I'm an individual, like all my friends. And I do find that funny sometimes. I've met people in the past, and I've like, wow, just it's blown me away with maybe they're from a different place.

And everything they say is original to me is like, wow. And then you visit where they live, and everybody's saying the same things. Everybody's got the same mannerisms.

And you realize there's very little original about that person. What you perhaps liked about them is you thought that maybe it was their personality, but it's almost not pretend personality, but a going along with it personality. A mimicking.

I used to do that. I used to be quite highly influenced by who I was around. So if I was around someone that said, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean? They did that a lot.

I'd start saying it. You know what I mean? You know what I mean, innit? Innit? And there was a lot of that in London when I lived in London. Innit? And it's like, you get me? Swear down.

I think even swear down was something that people said as a joke, and then started to say for real. And I struggle when I hear someone talking really seriously about something and they say swear down. Like, you know, I'm being honest, I'm being truthful.

Swear down. I'm like, I can't, I can't take that seriously. It's difficult.

Anyway, that's, that's why I worry, though. You know, I don't want to imagine a policeman knocking on doors saying, I'm sorry, there's been an accident. And unfortunately, this has happened.

And I'm like, no, no, really? Yes, we're down. Oh, no, that was worse than what you just told me. But anyway, it's time to have some breakfast.

So this is really just a bit of a silly bit of messing around kind of recording. Has it calmed you down? Has it relaxed you a bit more? Do you feel different? That's the bottom line. Do you feel better than how you did before? And remember, don't be taking anything serious.

Like I say, I'm just messing around. It's not serious. Really? If I'm being serious, you'll know because then I'm, I talk like this.

And now, the next thing I say, needs your full attention. I don't know what it would be, but you know, it's like, I am here to make a statement. Vroo, vroo, vroo, vroo, vroo.

Yeah, I don't know. None of my recordings really are supposed to be taken seriously. They're like a little play around.

Maybe useful, maybe not. Maybe relaxing. Maybe peaceful.

Perhaps just a bit of a distraction from what was. And sometimes that's useful. And beneficial.

Now, that brings me the end to this recording. So I'm going to go, thank you. I'm going to go, thank you.

Thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself, because you do deserve to be happy. And be gentle with yourself.

You deserve to feel safe. Lots of love. Bye.