(Overnight Voice Only) My New Journal | #1667 Let Me Bore You To Sleep | 22nd August 2026 | Jason Newland

Hello, hello and welcome to... Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Today is Saturday the 22nd of August 2026. It is indeed 39 minutes past 17 o'clock.

Ah, I'll get some water. I have... Oh Vinnie, by the way, is underneath the desk chewing on one of his chew things. He's quite happy.

He's been out twice today, or we've both been out twice today. He rarely goes out without me. And I was just thinking about when I went to, this is a few years back, when I first found out that my uncle, and I was in my, what was I, I was in my early 40s.

I found out my uncle had prostate disease. He was very, very poorly. So I went to the doctor and I asked her, can I please get a prostate exam? And she said, no, thanks.

I'm not doing it. Seriously. I said, I'm not doing that.

I'm not giving you a prostate exam. I can take socks off so I can have a look at your foot. That's what you've come for.

Okay. There's more to my body than just my foot. She said, yeah, but no matter how disgusting your foot is, I prefer to look at the foot than, you know, was that a bit rude? Anyway, um, today I have been really, really, really, really working on my website.

And although I was, I would have said to you, I'm really pleased with how it's gone, but I've just done something that's deleted something. It's a bit, um, bit vague. I know what do I need to do? Oh, I don't know.

Right. So I have actually, I put in so much work the last few days into making the website better and cleaner and more efficient and easier to use and easier to find stuff tidier and all that. But I've also done, um, today I got a little bit, I just had this idea because I wanted to put a journal on my website, but not a journal where I talk, um, do like a long, long journal and I spend hours typing.

I wanted to have something where I could just come back to it at different times during the day. So maybe just, you know, do a little entry when I first wake up, maybe do another one later in the day, one just before I go to bed, maybe, or sometimes not do one at all or do one when I'm out with Vinnie or when I'm waiting for a bus or waiting for a taxi or waiting in the queue of a supermarket, you know, whatever, just so I could do it mobily, mobily, you know, I mean, wherever I am using whatever, um, I've got on me.

So I felt so right now I would use a laptop and or I'd use the iPad but if I was sitting over there, I'd use the phone or if I was in a bedroom, I'd use a phone or if I was in the garden or in the park, I'd use a phone.

And I realized, well, first of all, I can't type into a phone. I can do very, very basic typing in a phone. It, my finger, my, I just, you know, my thumbs are too big.

I say my thumbs, I only use one thumb, but I can't, yeah, typing into a phone is not for me. Thank you very much. Thanks for the offer, but no thanks.

Typing on the laptop, although easier, is still very, very time consuming. So I thought, well, I need to find a way around this. And the obvious way is to record what I'm going to say directly into the journal.

And then is that way I can add, you know, add a, an ep, I don't know if you want to call it an episode or whatever, but wherever I am. So I figured out how to do that. I had to get code and all this stuff because the thing is, I didn't want to do it in the back end of the website.

When I say back end, I mean the editing side of the website. I wanted to be able to just go wherever I am, just go into jasonnewland.com, click on journal, and then record. And I don't necessarily have to watch the words come up on the screen, but just record, and then when I finished, have it saved and uploaded.

So I figured that out first. It took ages and ages and ages, because once I did it, it took away the design. I'd already designed the journal to be the same design as the rest of the website, like coloring and stuff.

But then, then, then, then, I had to keep redoing the code, redoing the code, redoing the code. And eventually I managed to get a, you know, a way to record it and upload it. But the quality of the text was terrible.

As far as it, it, well, as it would, it typed the way I speak. And I, you know, when I, when I make a podcast like this, I have the idea that I'm a fairly good speaker. I mean, I guess it's not public speaking, although, you know, it's going out to the public.

And I don't do a huge amount of editing. I mean, the main editing I do on the podcast is just trying to edit out unwelcome, unwelcome noises. Although I've had to give up trying to edit that dog out because it's just always there on and off.

And so I'm sorry about that is unless I make a podcast at three in the morning, I can't avoid the part of the possibility of that dog barking. It starts any time from six in the morning to 10 at night and I'm in bed at 10 at night. So, you know, it is one of those things, just one of those things.

It, you know, if there's, um, if a building was going up, you know, next door and the pile driving was going in and just, you know, smashing into the ground and shaking everything, I probably wouldn't make a podcast during that. Or if there was a couple of helicopters playing tennis in the garden, you know, it'd be noisy. So I wouldn't, I wouldn't, you know, record during that either.

To be fair, I'd probably be interested in watching it, especially as there's not enough room for two helicopters in the garden. It'd be a bit of a, yeah, it'd be worth watching it, but I'd like to watch it from a distance and to be out of this building when it happened, I think. So, I just, I looked at the text and I, I was a little bit surprised at how often I repeat words, how often I stutter, how often I, I mean, I mumble a bit as well.

And so I don't speak quite as clearly as I thought I did, but I'm not, I'm not an orator, I guess. And the grammar of the text was absolutely atrocious. Because first of all, because I'm just like talking into it, there's no full stops, no commas, no apostrophes.

There was no gaps, no paragraphs, nothing. It was one sentence, well, just one big paragraph really. But one sentence because it was, yeah, so it was, if I was going to edit it myself by hand, it would take a while.

I mean, I guess none of the entries are going to be particularly long, it's just an update. It might be an update on how I'm feeling, might be an update on the results of going to the doctors or the results of, you know, just could be anything, just something I'm thinking about. It's just a record, it's a little journal, my ongoing journal of my life, really, I suppose.

That's the sort of the purpose of it. But having to edit, I mean, firstly, if I was doing it on my phone, I'm recording it, then uploading it, I'd have to wait till I got home before I could edit it because I can't even really see the screen very well, especially not enough to be editing text. And so that I'd have to get home and do it and it could, it's just like, no, thanks.

No, no. So I had to think like, what can I do? I need a way to automatically edit this and also give it a title. And like a signing off, goodbye at the end.

So I didn't have to say that in case I forgot. So I spent probably more than half the day working on the editing side of things. Not just to edit, but to be able to do it from the website itself and to have a button on there.

So I can actually edit, so, you know, add and edit, add entry and edit all on the front page. So even people visiting the website can see those two buttons, but it won't mean anything. It won't work for anyone else but me.

So I'm like, oh, it was just, it was quite, yeah. I kept doing it and it didn't work. I kept doing it again and it didn't work.

And even up till about five minutes ago, I thought it worked. And I ended up accidentally deleting a journal entry that I just recorded and edited. So the editing seems to be okay.

Especially, yeah, I mean the formatting of the text, the full stops, paragraphs, all that stuff. It's probably better than I would do myself. Because you might not believe this, but I'm not actually an English scholar, an English literatura scholar, literatura, yeah, something like that.

And I ended up, yeah, it was all good. And then I tried to save it, it wouldn't save. I couldn't figure out why.

I'd allocated it to a different podcast. And I just, like, oh, I don't know what's going on here. Well, here's what's going on.

I'd completely deleted it. I don't know how I did it, but I did. Because I went and I deleted all the journals because I'm not sure.

I had about eight blogs. And I had one called Dear Luke, which I'd started doing a few years back. I've kept that just for myself.

And there's this one, Jason's Journal. There was another one, but I didn't really look at it. I just deleted it.

So maybe I shouldn't have done that. I should have looked first. But then I ended up deleting the most recent episode.

I genuinely don't know where it's gone. It just disappeared. Disappeared.

So what I've done now is I thought it'd be interesting just to test it while I'm talking to you. So I've recorded myself for the first 15 minutes of this podcast. And I want to see if it allows me to clean the script to clean journal.

So basically, it's using AI. So I'm using both the AI chat GPT to build some of the pages to code. I'm also using AI built within Shopify, the website itself.

So if I put in this, hopefully, it should work. So that's the, that's the thing. So that's all I need to put in is clean journal.

And it's, I mean, it's there's a lot of I guess there's a lot of text there, isn't there? Because Sidra and I have been talking for 15 minutes, but Oh, yep. Wow. See, it's amazing.

What would it took me? Quite a while. I mean, I say quite a while, but it's taken out all the mumbles. It's taken out the stuttering, the repetition, the repetitions.

And it's now readable. Because I realized actually, it's not the first time I realized this, because I have transcribed hundreds and hundreds of my recordings of my Let Me Bore You To Sleep recordings, and they're not readable. I thought I was fairly succinct, and quite clear.

And it's not, I don't think it's so much that I'm unclear as the people can't understand what I'm saying. But it might, this might surprise you, but I don't always stay on the same subject. And it's not that I move around, I don't just move around.

Sometimes I move around within the same sentence. I move from one thing to another, and then back and up back. And that is kind of part of what I'm doing.

That's part of the process is to relax your brain and relax your body and give you something else to think about other than your own worries and concerns. But at the same time, maybe struggle to think about what I'm thinking about or what I'm talking about, because I keep changing what I'm talking about it, and it might become harder to follow, but not in a stressful way, but in a boring way.

To the point where you just relax more and maybe fall asleep.

So you know, there's this method in my madness, I suppose. But as far as a book or a journal entry, wow, it's hard to, it's very, very, very hard to put it together like that. So what I'm going to do, so it's put it all in together or all perfectly, perfectly together.

Except it hasn't hasn't put in the goodbye and it hasn't given me the proper title. Because that's another thing I've got have had problems with the the code because it's supposed to add a title and the title is only supposed to be the day, the month, the year. So if today, Saturday, 22nd of August, 2026, and then the time, which would be now be six o'clock pm, 6pm.

And that's because I'll be making multiple entries into the journal in a day, maybe, maybe loads, maybe few, but I thought I'd just stick it to date, stick it to the date and time I'm doing the entry. And it's supposed to automatically do that. But it's not, it's really not.

So I have to work on that and get that fixed. But that's going to be a tomorrow issue. Because right now, I can't be bothered to do any more.

I've done enough. So let me just have a look, see if this is fixed. See if it's Yep, it's all uploaded.

So this one's called building my journal, a new way to record my thoughts. So I'll click on that. So at the top of the page, this is the journal.

It's got Jason's journal controls, edit this entry, add a new entry. So that'll only be me that can kind of access that. Building my journal, a new way to record my thoughts.

And it's just all the stuff that I was saying then, which is weird, considering it was nearly 20 minutes, but there's not a lot of writing there. So it makes me wonder maybe I'm not the quickest talker. So it says I put in so much work over the last few days making the website better, cleaner, more efficient and easier to use.

But today I had a new idea. I wanted to put a journal on my website. Not a long elaborate journal where I spend hours typing, but something I could dip in and out of throughout the day.

So it's, you know, I'm quite pleased with that, because it's a good size font. I've not checked it on my, on my phone. But I have tested it to record on the phone.

So I've tested it, recorded on phone and on the laptop. The phone's easier. The laptop I have to put in an H. I'll have to put in something H to get it to get it to start recording.

But on the phone, you just press the record, record, you know, image, microphone image. Thinking about it, I might just, no, I was gonna say I prefer just to do it if I'm here. I prefer just to do on the laptop.

If I'm actually at the desk. Because the whole kind of, you know, the editing bit is much easier here, like the clean journal. I can do it on the phone.

But you know, I feel like it's the writing is so small, I have to almost climb inside the phone to see what's what I'm doing. It's so it's easier really to do on laptop, as far as the editing side. And I can record and save and not necessarily upload it until I get home if I want.

You know, because that's the thing. I can do the like clean the journal part. But then I won't be able to read it on the screen so very well.

On the phone, especially with my left eye, my left eye, I can't even read the screen of the laptop. I've become a little bit obsessed with my left eye. Had I thought it? Really, I didn't think that I'd be that interested in a part of my body.

Well, not since I was a teenager. I mean, my left eye. It just fascinates me that how the words just mixed together on to try and read.

Just can't do it. If I cover if I close my right eye, great fine. It's a little bit I mean, it's not clear clear because I'm just using one eye.

And my eyesight is not great, but it's I can read it. The words are not sticking together. The left eye.

So try and read Jason's journal. It's J A S O N. So I move along then it's J A S O N. Then it's S N O S A N journal. So yeah, maybe that's the proper word.

That's a proper title. It should be Jason's urinal. Wow.

I'm a genius. So yeah, that's it really. That's all I've been doing.

The thing is this reminds me a little bit of the old days. Who'd have thought I'd be thinking of 2000 as the old days. Sitting at the laptop, working on code, website code, testing and testing and retesting and testing again for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours.

But there is something quite satisfying when it's complete. Although technically, this isn't complete. I mean, it is if I don't mind the fact that it's not doing everything that I asked that I expected to do, but put a title in and have a signing off bit.

That's not a big deal. It's doing everything else. But I'll have to tinker around with the code and find out how I can change it to make sure it abides by that rule.

And I'm wondering whether or not I should make that section where it says edit this entry and add a new entry, make it invisible to anyone else that visits the website. Have it only available for me to see. I don't know.

Add to it and new. So yeah, it's been quite good. You know, in a kind of a way.

Kind of. It's been all right. I quite enjoyed it.

I don't know. Something's okay. Not bugging me.

But when I watch YouTube videos of stuff in the past, it just amazes me. I know there's a lot of bots out there that go on to channels and just post stuff. And I think I don't quite know how that works.

Are the bots just random, which doesn't make sense. Are YouTube, have YouTube created the bots to go on to make comments on YouTube videos in order to increase viewership or to increase interaction, you know, to get other people to post comments and replies. Or is it the owner of the YouTube, or you know, the creators of the YouTube channels that are using their own design bots to add comments on their videos in order to make their channels seem more popular and to help with the YouTube algorithm to increase video views.

So I don't know. Not sure how it will work. I don't know.

Because, you know, if I could create a bot that visits my website, or visits my YouTube channel, I imagine that would be frowned upon. I wouldn't want to have like be put in fake reviews. I understand, well it's loud, isn't it? I understand why people do it.

I'm sure that dog's got a loud speaker today. Wow. She's all silly Billy.

She won't put the dog, won't put the dog inside. Insists it's got to stay in the garden all day. It wants to stay in the garden, no doubt, but it's like, no, it has to be available to make noise all day.

Dear Jason, I remember when you didn't complain about the dog. That's what you seem to do. Moan, moan, moan, moan, moan.

Yeah, I'm sorry. I'll try not to anymore. I mean, part of the reason I was moaning about the dog in the past, by the way, that was me doing the complaint then.

It wasn't a real message, a real letter. And it's because it was stopping me from doing stuff. Now I'm not going to let it stop me from making podcasts, which means it's going to be in the podcast.

And that does annoy me. Sorry, it does. Soz.

But I don't want a barking dog that's barking practically all day long on and off to be disturbing my podcasts. But then I listened back to the podcast and it's so low. So I can hear it way better than a microphone can.

This microphone is not built for hearing things in a distance. It's built for hearing things some inches away from it. If I was standing in the garden, or if I was standing the other side of the room, it would hardly pick me up at all.

If I was standing in the garden, it wouldn't hear me talking. It'd be hard to hear me shouting. It'd be like, chuck me down a Mars bar or whatever it is I'd be shouting.

So there you go. And there's a kid out playing and this, you know, we're coming towards the winter. So there's going to be a lot of wind, wintry weather, rain against the window and the tweeze blowing in the wind.

The rattles, the rattles of my bones as the wind blows through the window. Yeah, so you know, there's always going to be sound. It's never going to be completely silent.

Unless of course, for me, I would say the only time that it's potentially really quiet is late at night, early hours in the morning. And I'm, I don't, I'm not, it'd be good if I could get that sentence out, wouldn't it? I'm not a late person anymore. I don't stay up late anymore.

I used to. In fact, I used to stay up all night long. All night long.

All night. All night long. Yeah.

Lionel Richie. Was it 1984 or 83? It brings up, it just does bring back memories that does. I've got these quite happy memories.

Because my stepmum, my first stepmum, I idolized her. And I liked everything that she liked. Well, not everything, but you know, I'd, you know, like, she liked music.

So she loved Lionel Richie. She loved Barry Manilow. And so did I. She liked watching dramas on telly.

The Thorn Birds is such a drama and Shogun. Ironically, both with Richard Chamberlain. I think she might have liked Richard Chamberlain.

Dr. Kildare himself. That's a weird reference, isn't it? But yeah, he, um, those shows went on for hours and hours and hours and hours. And I used to watch them with her.

She used to record them on video. I think some of them were quite late at night. So she'd watch, she'd record them and we'd watch them together.

There was another show, there was a TV series. I don't think it was a film. I'm pretty sure it's called Seagull Island.

And it's about a blind lady who's basically being messed around. 1981. Wow.

But it was really, really freaky. And it was, I'm just have a look. It was 19.

It was a horror. Basically, it was looks like they made a movie as well. That's weird.

So it looks like they did a movie in 1979. They did a miniseries. I say they did, you know, the those people who ever did them.

There was a TV show called Seagull Island. TV miniseries in 1981. The 79 secret of Seagull Island.

Then there was 1982, the secret of Seagull Island, which well, it's got to be a different thing. But then look at this. It's got a picture of the same woman.

I'm very, very confused. Unless maybe they created the movie, or broke the movie down into. I don't know.

Broke the movie into two episodes, TV episodes. I did that with Spider Man, the original Spider Man movie, back in late 70s. I think it was.

And they turned that into a Spider Man series. Just from that movie. Spider Man, Spider Man.

See, I think I'm not sure if the movie goes now. Realize how fortunate they are to have the quality, the picture quality that we have these days. You know, I mean, look at the special effects that I grew up with.

I mean, I said, Okay, you can think, well, I suppose the first movie that really seemed to put in a lot of effort. As far as special effects goes, and is pretty one of the most famous movies of all time is Star Wars. And Superman was another one.

They went all out on the special effects and used the most up to date special effects for the Superman movie. And then they kind of did the same thing with Star Trek movies. And I think the ones that had the budgets, I don't know if Battlestar Galactica was where it was on the budget scale, to be honest.

Because in the early 80s, there was still science fiction TV shows that had awful special effects, or just like regular special effects, because it was very difficult to go and watch Star Wars and then come home and watch Doctor Who. You know, both made at the same time. Slightly different when it comes to the special effects.

And I don't think Star Wars even had a huge budget to start with. And I'm surprised that Doctor Who didn't have a good budget considering it was, well, I don't know about then, but it's been popular all around the world. It was one of the most popular TV shows in the UK for a long time.

But the special effects weren't great, necessarily. I didn't mind because I liked, I just loved it anyway. But I mean, I think we're moving now from like in my lifetime.

It's been quite an interesting period, I guess, to be alive in a sense of, but I suppose it is for everyone. But then I imagine there's been some people that have lived their entire lives and nothing much has changed. You know, they've been born, maybe they were born into working on a farm.

For example, you don't go to hunt or gather or whatever. So maybe they worked, they lived on a farm, born on a farm. Their parents were farmers, their grandparents were farmers, great-great-grandparents were farmers.

And they were a farmer, then their kids were farmers, and then their kids' kids were farmers, you know. So they might have been born, raised, lived on a farm, lived that lifestyle their whole life. And the world maybe didn't really change that much for them.

Because there was no television, there was no radio, no newspapers. I'm going back a while. And the world was really the village you lived in, or the town you lived in, wasn't it? That was the world.

And there was a time, a long time ago, there was a time when space really was the sea. People thought that was it, that's all there was, was their little island, or big island. Or maybe they thought that's all there was, you know, in their village.

And then one day they come across other humans, and they don't know what they are. And they're just from like three miles away, because people didn't travel, they didn't need to. I love the fact that I can be almost, I don't know, quite open and thoughtful.

And at the same time, at the same time completely ignorant. It's great. It's such a wonderful position to be in.

I was just thinking, how much has changed during my life, but then imagine how much changed in my dad's life. How much changed in my grandparents' life. My granddad was born in the 1920s.

No, he was born in 1910, my granddad. And so he saw two world wars. He wasn't old enough to be in the first one, but he was in the second one.

So he saw, you know, so much stuff. But I guess I'm not really talking about that kind of thing. I'm talking about, I suppose, lifestyle, inventions, creations, way of living.

Yeah, it's yeah, lifestyle, way of living. You didn't have to say it twice. So for me, I guess I'm thinking about phones, mobile phones.

I grew up and we had phones connected to the wall. I mean, now we're not, I don't know, hardly anyone's got one, but the term landline became quite well used. But I'd never even heard the term landline until, what was it, 1996 when I was a security guard.

And that wasn't because of mobile phones, it's because I had a walkie talkie. And they'd say, if it was something really serious or personal or private, call me on a landline. They wouldn't want it over the air because other people could like tune into it and listen.

So if I said I wanted to talk about constipation or something, not over the air, landline. And, or maybe I spilled some peanut butter on my tie. I didn't eat peanut butter.

Peanut butter is one of those things that I think of like, then I think, actually, this really tastes nice. I just can't move on from the look, how it looks. And yeah, I can't, yeah, it does taste really, really nice.

Because I remember, even though I haven't eaten it for decades, I just can't, I couldn't get over the, I don't have to go into detail, it's obvious, you know, but it just, but it's, it's nice. Bovril, on the other hand, Bovril, oh my goodness, the whole, oh you either love it or hate it, it is, I'm not a big fan of Bovril. But then I guess maybe it's because I've got a bit of a sweet tooth, what's left of them.

So bitter things, which I would, I think it's fair enough to say that Bovril, or Marmite, sorry, Bovril's the drink, Marmite is the paste. And I think it's safe to say that Marmite is bitter, it's not sweet, is it? Although sweet and sour goes together, so what about sweet and bitter? I wonder how they came across that. I want to say they, whoever invented sweet and sour food, and you know, the mixture, I wonder how they, how did they come, realise that, wow, that's bitter, that's sweet, that's sour, that's sweet.

Like two things, I'm trying to think of something that's sour, a lemon, grapefruit, grapefruit, yeah, grapefruit can be sour, can't it? But if you put sugar on it, ah, it's weird, without sugar, not all grapefruit, there's, what is the blood grapefruit? The ones that you don't need sugar on, but the real sour grapefruits, it's like, ah, no, I couldn't, couldn't eat that, but cover it in sugar, it's delightful.

Absolutely, I'm trying to think of other things, I feel the only time I ever used to really mix things together other than food, like on a plate, is when I had my paper round and about, I don't know, 83, 84, I used to buy sweets, so toffees, maybe some chocolate, and these soft mints came out, and they were basically, they were mints, but they were soft inside and chewy, so I used to put one of them, and some chocolate, and a chew, and mix it all together, sometimes something minty as well, man, it was like a party inside my mouth, it was amazing.

The problem is, ah, I don't know if you hear it, she's blaming the other dogs in the area, I have heard another dog, but not recently, she's one of them, it's everyone else's fault, bliss, so I had all these wonderful feelings, and yum, yum, yum, yum, in my mouth, but then, by the time I got home, I had a troubled tummy, because I'd eaten way too many sweets, really, and every day I think to myself, I'm not doing that, I'm not doing that again, not doing that tomorrow, because, you know,

maybe just have one, one thing, and then have my dinner when I get home, because it was putting me off my food, it was like, oh, and every day I'd do the same thing, I did it for weeks, because I loved it so much, in fact, I would probably say, I spent more money, I probably spent my whole paper round wages on sweets, while I was doing a paper round, which is completely pointless, yeah, it's completely pointless, I do wonder where I got my money from back then, because I did karate,

so that cost me money twice a week to pay, it wasn't a lot of money, but I had to pay to go to every week, twice a week, I also bought the equipment, I bought loads of gym stuff, weights, punch bags, free weights, bench, all that stuff, so I paid for that, I was buying books constantly, I don't know, just like, I know I had a few different jobs, but none of them paid good money, it was a paper round, I was probably on 25 pence an hour or something,

I mean generally, I don't think I would have made more than about £3, £4 a week, if that, yeah, I reckon I'd be lucky if I made £5 a week, probably less than that, it's such a long time ago, that's why I wish I'd had a journal, and I could go back and just like, wow, you know, because as far as an annual hourly wage, an hourly rate, the lowest I remember was about 75 pence an hour, when I worked in a bakery in the restaurant near the seafront,

and I do believe that was about 75 pence an hour, and I'd get paid, I'd get paid every day I think though, because if I worked, I worked during the summer, I'm pretty sure they paid me every day, so 75 pence an hour, I was there from, hello Vinnie, hello darling, right, so are you ready to eat your dinner, because I had to put it in the fridge, wouldn't eat it, he hasn't eaten all day, I want to say all day, I'm talking all day long, have you, haven't eaten anything since last night,

because he turned his nose up at the food I gave him, he didn't eat the food I gave him last night, it had something earlier in the day, and because he had a lot of treats yesterday you see, so I thought, I'm not chucking away another packet of food, so I put it back in the fridge, and he's licking me, it might be because he wants to go out to be fair, but he does also need to eat, what is it you want Vinnie, are you hungry, are you hungry,

who is he flipping your ears, are you hungry, do you want din-dins, you want num-nums, do you want num-nums, hey, do you want num-nums, oh I didn't tell you, the other day I went into the pet shop, and I got him a treat, but I also got him, well I've realised, that he doesn't want dog toys, what he wants is cat toys, maybe it's because of his size, I don't know, so I got him a little, a little squidgy ball, a blue ball for a cat, he loves it,

it's like a little sponge thing, he just chucks it around and stuff, and I got him a little white mouse, not so bold about the mouse, but he definitely likes the ball, so what I'm going to do probably every month, go in there and see what other like little mouse toys that I can get for him, because I don't know, that seems to be the sort of thing he likes to play with, I know, you know, he's very little, I mean he's the size of a big cat, basically,

or even a small cat, you're only the size of a cat, ain't you, hey, you're like the size of a pussy, yeah you are, and I thought maybe I'd get him one of those scratching posts, and what do cats have, like a little, should we get you a little cage, get you a little, get you a litter box, a little litter box, you know, if I got him a litter box and he actually used it, it'd be terrible because I would never leave the flat, I wouldn't have to,

so I wouldn't do it, so the fact that I have to take him out, so he goes to the toilet, is good, otherwise we'd never go out, would we, no, that's not fair on you, is it, it's not fair on you, it's not fair on me either, but, and now the weather's started to cool down, I'm taking him out three times a day again, like I used to, just had to wait for it to cool down, didn't we, yes we did, yes we did, I had to wait for things,

what are you doing, oh no, not inside my ear, sound weird doesn't it, he's licking me, feels a bit strange, I'm not sweaty, all that time, all those days in a row, it was just like sweaty, sweaty, sweaty, now he's almost sitting on me, waiting to go out, aren't you, really want to go out that bad, yeah, okay, all right, let's go then, sorry, I don't, he doesn't normally hassle me like this, well he's not hassling me, but before we go, I just want to quickly look, this Seagull Island miniseries,

let's just, I remember this, because it was freaky, it was very strange, a five-part Italian language miniseries about a young English woman searching for her blind sister in Italy, ah, not to be confused with the English language feature film version, The Secret of Seagull Island, so okay, but it's got Prunella Ransom in it, The Secret of, okay, The Secret of Seagull Island, but that's also got Prunella Ransom, it says not to be confused, of course it's going to be confused, so what they've done is, they have done what I said,

a woman's, they've basically done a feature-length version of the miniseries, so turned it into a movie, I'm sure I watched it as like a miniseries, I'm pretty sure I did, I don't remember having it all in one go, and how many parts was it, episode one, oh, there's only two series, okay, Barbara comes to Italy to visit her blind sister, but when she arrives, she finds her sister, she, oh, right, okay, I don't want to spoil it, unless you haven't watched it, I know it's like 40 odd years ago,

but yeah, it was a bit, I tell you what, if you ever watch Tales of the Unexpected, it's a little bit like that, it's a bit, yeah, it's a very, very strange movie or series, it's very, very well done, but it kind of stuck with me a little bit, a little bit like Shogun, the TV show Shogun, the Thorn Birds even, it's some of those like miniseries, would just, I really liked them, I'm not sure how much I concentrated, but I did like them, and I'm not sure if I liked them,

because my step-mom liked them, and the rest of the family were pacing the streets, wondering how long they had left before they can come back, safely come back into the house, without that show being on television, I don't think they all liked it, so there was only two episodes, two episodes, three episodes, no, there was three episodes, there was four episodes, there was five episodes, wow, it's only showing them, so there was five episodes, it's not saying how long each episode lasted for, but there was five, that was a really,

really good show, so it was on TV, well according to this, Saturday, July the 18th, 1981, years, top rated, top rated, what's it coming up, what's the television coming up for, by the way, I'm going to go, because Vinnie's being so patient, you know sometimes he's so well behaved, I just fall in love with him, you know, he's just so good, hasn't barked once, the dog over the, in the garden, he hasn't, doesn't bark at any of the neighbours, had a little bit of a, early this morning, someone was in the garden,

but nothing happened, didn't come, nothing came of it, he always barks at the postman woman, but there's nothing I can do about that, it's, I think there's that rivalry, cats and dogs, and dogs and postal workers, there's that thing going on, it's been going on for decades, isn't it, centuries and centuries, when you think about it, just things like toilets, so when my granddad was born, there were no inside toilets, there was no televisions, no colour televisions, but no televisions at all, in 1910, I don't even know if there's any cars on the road,

in London, probably not much, if, I don't know when cars kind of started being, like, a lot of cars were on the road, planes, there were, I don't think there's any passenger planes in 1910, was there, I suppose with me, it's things like the internet, you know, I was born into, I suppose, computers were around, computers have been around for, since the 50s, but computers, like, personal computers started to be a thing in the 80s, like, late 70s, early 80s, and it became popular when I was, like, in my, like,

11, 12, 13, 14, kind of period, but I was never interested in them, and I literally didn't touch a computer until 1997, 1997, I touched a computer screen, or a keyboard, because I worked on a reception, and I was a security guard, and the receptionist was teaching me a little bit about how to use the computer, so I'd never, never even, I'd seen them, but I'd never had any interest, so I was kind of learning how to put stuff in the bin, and how to move stuff with the, the, what's it,

the mouse, and things like that, because it was a Macintosh they had, and then I got my own computer, which was probably 98, and that's when I really sort of took notice, and really got into it, or was it 99, I don't know, but it was, in fact, no, when I got the computer, the only thing I really liked was the internet, without the internet, for me, laptop was pointless, technically, it still is, without the internet, there's no point, everything I do is kind of internet based, yeah, I mean,

I've thought about computer wise, anyway, I'm going to go, so thank you for listening, remember to be kind to yourself, because you do deserve to be happy, and be gentle with yourself, you deserve to feel safe, lots of love, bye, kissy, kissy, kissy.