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Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.
And this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. I just realized my glasses are smeary. But in order for me to go and get my wet wipes for my glasses, I'm going to have to get out of this tangle of microphones and equipment.
As well as recording this for my podcast. It's also available on YouTube as a video. So I'm also I will post it on to Instagram x and TikTok.
I'm also recording live or streaming live on TikTok as well. So hi to everyone that's on TikTok viewing me doing my podcast. So today is Monday's boring objects.
So what I do is I try and think of a subject. It's not necessarily boring to me. But it's an object or subject.
It could be anything. I've talked about so many different things over the years. And that's all it is.
And I do this kind of regularly. I'm not sure what time it is. I don't know.
Where's the time? Oh, it's seven minutes past five. So I should be on here for the next hour or so. But I'm not going to be able to say too much as far as having a conversation.
And I'm not going to be doing requests, like saying a weird sentence or anything like that. I'm just going to do the recording. And also like to say thank you to those that have on TikTok that have followed me and that have been watching my videos, because that's cool.
Get quite a few views of my videos. But also to let you know that some of my videos are longer than an hour, which means if you want to see the whole hour version or the version that's maybe an hour and a half, you need to go to YouTube to watch the video or listen on a podcast. So I can only do up to an hour.
58-59 minutes for the TikTok and X and Instagram. And relax. So I want to start off.
And I'm thinking of starting off every recording by reminding everybody that's listening or watching that it's okay to ask for help. That we all need to ask for help sometimes. And just want to remind people of that.
So what can I talk about today? I did a recording Saturday, I didn't do a recording Sunday. I watched a box in Saturday night. And there's a world title fight early hours, Sunday morning, but it wasn't on TV.
Beezoo says talk about the Beatles. I can talk about the Beatles if you want. I don't.
The Beatles split before I was even born, but I can talk about them. Okay, so Beezoo says talk about the Beatles. I'm going to talk about the Beatles.
Any other requests? Do you think Paul's cute? Right, okay, I thought that was a serious thing for a second then. So what should we do? Talk about Epstein? No. Is that Einstein you mean? No.
Thinking I'd get some kind of serious thing is, I don't want serious, just like a genuine request. I mean, it was Elvis's birthday recently. So I have to ignore some of the things people are writing.
Right or left. My uncle is Jimmy. Nope, I'm not going to read that one out.
That sounds like Uncle Sebastian would have done that one. Or was it Uncle Hubert? Oh dear. So I can talk about the Beatles.
I like the Beatles. But I, I mean, I grew up, I was born in 1970, which, the last century. And I think the Beatles split up in 1969.
So they'd already finished. My first real kind of knowledge about the Beatles was, my dad was a big Beatles fan, because he grew up in the 60s. So that was kind of his 20s, was in the 60s.
So I, he was a big fan of the Beatles. And when we used to travel to Wales or go on holiday, he would have these tapes. It was like, they were called six track tapes.
Now these big old things are like, almost like the old style computer game consoles games, you know, big old things that just used to go in, not like normal tapes. He had loads of those from the 60s and 70s. And they sounded really good.
They were really good quality sound. And I want to, we had a games room upstairs in my house. Because when we moved into this big house, there was me, my two brothers and my little brother who'd just been born.
This was, so we moved about 1979 into a bigger house. It had one, two, three, four, five, six, seven bedrooms. My little brother, I had one bedroom.
There was a spare bedroom for my step mum's mum, or whoever visited. My little brother had the box room. My other brother had the room ahead of the stairs upstairs, three floors.
My oldest brother had the next room. And then the big room that's right at the front on the top was like our playroom. So we had a snooker table, pool table, I used to convert, you know, into a tennis table table, tennis table table.
And then someone just asked me, where's my hair at? Yeah, I shaved it. But apparently, TikTok didn't like me shaving my head. For some reason.
But yeah, I shaved it. I was doing it live. And then I don't know if it was the sound of the buzzing or whatever.
I don't know. And then so my dad had his recording stuff up there, or his six track player. And we used to play songs from the 50s and the 60s.
We could also listen to stuff from the 70s and 80s, you know, on the radio and that. So I kind of got to know some of the older songs, stuff in the 50s, like rubber ball bouncing back to you. Which I think was kind of very Buddy Holly-esque.
And I see, oh yes, I think there was some seating in the where this where the window was. I used to go up there, but I prefer to go up there when there was no one up there, like go up with my friend, because we could play pool or table tennis. And it was kind of more equal.
Because I could never beat my brothers. They always beat me always, like didn't give me a chance because they were a lot older. So I didn't really get a chance to be any good.
But then I played, I'd have a friend come around and used to be alright. We used to be quite nice. There was a point for me saying this, yeah, because then we used to travel to Wales for our holidays.
We used to go tenting. And it was a long journey. Longer, six hours or longer.
And my dad would be playing so many songs from the 60s and 70s. Like rock music, the Beatles, he'd go for a couple of hours worth of Beatles songs. And I kind of got used to the Beatles hearing it.
And then when John Lennon passed away, I kind of, that was when there was a lot of like John Lennon movie songs on the radio, got to number one again. And I didn't really catch like Imagine and Woman the first time around. But I had heard a lot of the Beatles songs and so I knew kind of who he was, or kind of, I knew his voice anyway.
I think as I got older, I realised how big that they were. Once I was kind of a bit more socially conscious, maybe reading the newspapers, watching the news. I was a big fan of Paul McCartney songs, especially the Frog Song.
Underrated that one. I think it's still got to number one. Pipes Apiece.
I'm pretty sure 1979. It was Muller King Tyre was the number one for about 17 years. Really like Muller King Tyre.
So if anyone wants to know what my name is, it's in my profile. It's actually, that is my actual real name. Jason Newland.
I don't put, I don't use a false name or anything like that. I just can't think of a false one really. I reckon Muller King Tyre is the only song that I've ever liked that had bagpipes in them.
I'm not against bagpipes. I just don't find them pleasing to my ear. It's very kind of really kind of, it's a particular sound.
But on Muller King Tyre, it just, yeah, I don't know why, but it really, maybe that's the genius of Paul McCartney is able to fit it all together. So I liked a lot of Paul McCartney songs in the early 80s, like Say, Say, Say with Michael Jackson, Band on the Run, another love song, Band on the Run, because he was with EA. He created Wings as well, didn't he, with his wife Linda and some other people.
It was a bit like Phil Collins. Like Phil Collins would do his own songs and then he'd do, he'd have his, you know, with UB40 or whatever they're called. So what was the one that Phil Collins was with? Wow, the band.
I forget. It's just terrible, isn't it? I can remember the Pete, like Peter Gabriel was in that band as well. And then Phil Collins took over and he was the drummer.
So yeah, Dive Straights, one of them. Someone wants to know how old I am. I'm 103.
I'm 55 and you're right, I am too old to be on here. I'm too old. I shouldn't be doing anything at my age, should I? I should be sitting, drinking me cocoa, looking out the window.
I wonder what's going on out there. I'll be honest. Sometimes I used to think, I wonder what I'll be doing if I get to be 55, if I get to be in my 50s.
What will I be doing with my life? And I couldn't have guessed this. Genuinely could not have guessed this. It's a very, very different from what I expected.
I'm not sure why expected. I mean, when I was very young, I thought, well, if I live to be that old, perhaps I'll have a family. I'll have a wife or two or three.
I don't know. Who knows what's going to happen during that period. But I don't mean at the same time, because that's illegal.
As long as you don't tell anyone. It's so maybe I'll have a I'll have a wife or have or just be in a long term relationship, have kids maybe. And by now I could be a grandfather.
I mean, if everyone had kids really early, I suppose I could be a great grandfather. But that means everyone has to kind of get together at 16 and have a kid and which is the age in this country. But yeah, I could be a grandfather.
It's weird. I don't. I don't use to say I used to hear people say all you don't.
I don't feel my age. I don't feel old. I think it's different.
I mean, I don't have the energy I used to have. I don't have the flexibility physically I used to have. And I've yeah, I've changed.
I'm not the same person I was 25 years ago, 20 years ago, maybe even 10 years ago. And a lot of that might just be due to life. Generally, you know, life experiences.
It's hard to really kind of figure out what's been the the thing. I mean, my dad's a lot different now to how he used to be when he was in his 20s and 30s and 40s and 50s and 60s and 70s. He's still in his 70s.
So age is a weird thing. The only thing I do get concerned about sometimes is is it if I left it too late to have any kind of relationship. And I don't know the answer to that.
Because I've had many opportunities over the years hard to believe, but it's true. And not for a while, but I have had, you know, a few opportunities to possibly be with someone that really likes me. And I've either messed up or just haven't taken the, the cues that were given to me the, the signals, the hints.
Some of them have been so obvious, I won't even tell you. But yeah. So I don't know, maybe I've left it too late.
Who knows? I learned something quite big last year. When I might not go all sort of serious, but I had a friend and he, you know, he left the planet as it were. And I realized that, you know, when people say, life is short, life is precious, make, you know, make the most of it, enjoy your time.
And sometimes it does seem just like, oh, yeah, it's just another one of those platitudes, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, life is precious. And, but yeah, it is, actually.
And I don't think I really appreciated that for a long time. However, when I started looking at, like at the end of last year, I was considering stopping doing all this and like trying to figure out what's the point and what have I, you know, for me, what do I want to do with my life? If I'm going to do something that I enjoy, that mean, that is meaningful to me.
And after quite a bit of consideration and thinking, I realized that this is what is meaningful to me.
Making recordings to help people to relax, help people to sleep, help people to feel calmer. And that's, that's a useful thing for me to be doing with my time. That's an important way for me to spend my life, I think.
It's not for everyone. But for me, yeah, yeah. So I'm kind of being quite introspective, is that the right word? What's retrospective, introspective? I've been thinking about things.
And although I'm not always necessarily hugely motivated to do anything. Oh, thank you, Emily. And I'm trying to acknowledge people.
Say hi to Selma as well. So I don't want to ignore TikTok because it's I'm live. But at the same time, I'm recording the video for YouTube and the podcast for Apple podcasts and Spotify and all that stuff.
So I'm kind of doing three things at the same time. And as you know, multitasking might not be my thing, or you might not know, but multitasking is not great. So I'm cool.
Thank you. So I guess that's why I've tried to increase my production. I've started to do more stuff this year, if you might have noticed.
I mean, we're not even two weeks into the new year, and I've released tomorrow, I'll have done 10 days in a row of the short relaxation hypnosis sessions. I've pretty much made a Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast video as well. Pretty much every day.
I didn't do one yesterday, but so I might have missed a day or two. But nearly every day. I've done some other stuff.
So I'm being proactive trying to focus on. So I know I can't help everyone, obviously. And not everyone and not everything I do is going to be to everyone's taste.
But a really lovely message earlier from somebody that listens to my podcast, that they contacted me via TikTok on their son's account, because she doesn't have social media. And she told me that she'd had a recent had a bereavement and my recordings were helpful for her to to during this period. Again, a message like that is to me very powerful.
And it makes it gives what I do more meaning. More makes more sense to me to continue to do what I'm doing. And I know I'm being a little bit serious.
I normally like to muck around if I can. And don't worry, I'll start making some weird noises at some point. Oh, itchy leg.
But getting something like that personal getting a personal message. And I won't tell you what, what she said, because it is, you know, it's personal, but if she did, so I could read it out for one, but I can't actually access it while I'm doing this. But I kind of, I could feel for her because the I'd had a kind of similar, not similar, but a kind of situation with my friend a couple of years ago.
And yeah, so that yeah, so that's it. So I do appreciate getting messages, genuine messages of like, just saying if what I'm doing is useful. That's all I want it to be.
I don't want I want to be. I remember years ago, when I first moved in here, I had a I had my, my, my psychologist, my therapist was coming here. And she was talking to me and she said, I said, I don't think I feel like I should be doing more for the community.
And because I'm not working, I feel like I should be contributing to the community to the local community of my town. And she pointed out that, okay, maybe I'm not contributing to the local community directly, maybe not community, contributing to the town, the local area, but I'm contributing to people around the world, different countries. Because this was 11 years ago, no, about eight years ago, actually, nine years ago.
And I've been doing this thing for 20 years. So it's like, okay, I hadn't really thought of it like that. Reaching, it's not like it's a huge audience, but it's a spread out audience.
And I think because every country pretty much in the world is listening to me at some point, people in those countries. If only I could crack the Chinese market. So many people in China.
I mean, what I might do, and I reckon the way podcasts are going, it won't be long. And I reckon next year or two. But people just be able to press a button.
And I'll be able to hear exactly the same podcast, or YouTube video, overdubbed with their own language, in the same voice as what I've got. And lip synced, so that my lips would change to, to suit the way I'm talking. I don't think we're far away from that.
I mean, it can be done. But you know, it costs money to do that stuff. I reckon it will be standard in a couple of years.
Which means more people in other countries will they will be able to be annoyed by me, maybe I don't know. How can I annoy more people? So I realised some of you might think, Oh, some people might be watching a video for the first time. Some people might be watching streaming on TikTok for the first time, or listening on my podcast for the very first time and thinking, what is he going on about?
And I can't say really, I'm not always sure.
But I am supposed to be talking about the Beatles, the Beatles. What's my favourite song? Oh, I tell you my favourite album, Sgt Pepper. I went through this period, or is it Sgt Pepper's Lonely Heart Club Band, I went through this period in 1989.
And I was staying in this person's flat. My job was looking after their kid. But the only only job I had was to be there at night, because they both had night jobs.
They worked overnight. So my only job really was to yeah, be there, be there overnight, and then take her to school. So they would stay up, the mother would stay up, get ready for school, breakfast and everything.
And then I then they would go to bed. And I would take her to school. And then she would pick her up from school herself.
So that was my only job is just so she was in bed before I was before they left, because they'd leave at like half nine. And she was only like, six or something. So she was in bed pretty seven or eight in the evening.
And then I would be there sleeping on the floor on sofa cushions. And I had no money. And part of the deal was, they would feed me.
And they would give me some money to spend some spending money. So you know, to do the job. And they didn't give me any money, but they did let me eat.
But they didn't buy much food. So in the end, I got a little part time job in the morning, which they seem to be annoyed with. Even though it finished at half eight, just half six to half eight.
Yeah, but we need to we you need to be ready to take her to school. I said, I am. Yeah, but what if you what if you're late? So I can't really be late because the supermarket is directly opposite the flat you're living in.
It takes me less than a minute to get there one minute. And to get to school was around the corner. So it's like five minutes, I'd say a five minute walk to the school.
I mean, it was really everything's very close to each other there. And I mean, I've got that part time job, it's the same part time job I had in 1987. Because I used to work above a chip work, I used to live above a chip shop and work in a chip shop.
And the money was ridiculously bad. Because they put me on the YTS scheme, I agreed to it. So I can't really moan.
But it was the YTS scheme when I was a kid was kind of like an apprenticeship, like a city and guilds apprenticeship thing that they had previously. And then but with the apprenticeship, you would not have been able to get an apprentice like when my dad was a kid, or when he left school, rather, he got an apprenticeship as an electrician. My uncle's got apprenticeships in the trade as well.
So one got an apprenticeship as a carpenter. The other one got an apprenticeship as a plumber. So they worked with a plumber or carpenter, my dad was with an electrician.
And it did three years or four, I don't know how many years it was three years or four years. And at the end of it, they were qualified. They had to go to college and do exams and stuff, but they were qualified as in that trade.
And they didn't get paid much. But at the end of it, they had something really tangible. And my dad had, he earned a living his whole life, because he had a trade and he always, always had work.
He never never went without work ever. The only time he didn't work is when he was ill. I mean, it's always in hospital or, you know, something like that.
So because he was self employed most of his life. So that was what the YTS was actually replacing. But the YTS, though people were misusing it.
The companies were misusing it like so someone that worked in a little shop or owned a little shop on the corner, would get someone in instead of paying them 60 pound a week, which was 70 pound 80 pound a week. And give them 27 pound a week. And I don't think they'd even pay they pay towards that I'm not sure I don't even even have to pay that much.
It was government funded. So they definitely took advantage of the of the situation. Can't really blame them to be honest.
But oh, yes, what I did. I got a job in a supermarket was just up the road. Cleaning in the morning, 630 till 830.
And I started working at nine, where it might be it might have been six till eight, I start working at nine, something like that. And my boss insisted that I leave that job because I was too tired. Yeah, I was probably earning half the amount of money as well.
Well, probably more I was probably getting what would I be getting? One, two, I was probably getting like maybe 17 pound a week from that shop that job. Probably at least a pound an hour, maybe more. So it was a big boost to my wages.
But oh, well, it was tiring. I remember I used to get home, have some cornflakes with some milk on and sugar and drink a can of Coke at the same time, whilst watching breakfast telly. Which could explain why my blood, my blood sugar level so high these days.
But I guess I was trying to give myself a boost to stay awake. Because not only that, I'd be working till 10 at night. In the chip shop, I go home, while I lived upstairs.
I didn't want to go straight to bed. And I was also young, so I didn't have the need to sleep all the time. I wasn't tired.
I needed sleep. But my issue was getting out of bed in the morning, getting up, going to sleep. I wasn't really bothered about it.
Getting up was like, oh, and I used to stay up for hours. Working out business plans, how I could make some money, how I could change my life. And didn't really.
I enjoyed doing it, but I never made any money. It was just, I like the creative part of it, I guess. I'm just trying to think going back to the Beatles, because that was supposed to be what I was talking about.
And because the Beatles kind of gone, they were gone. And it was just the the remaining Beatles, like Ringo, Ringo Starr, George Harrison and Paul McCartney, who were making songs or making albums. Now Ringo Starr, I don't remember him making any songs, he might have done.
But he still remained famous. And he was in some movies as well. And of course, he took on the role as Thomas the Tank Engine's voice.
I don't know if that was in the 80s or 90s. But he did that for a long time, I think. George Harrison, he did.
So he did a few famous songs in the 70s. Like, Oh, my Lord, oh, sweet Lord, I only want to hold you. I only want to kiss you.
Or maybe that was the one. I don't know. But there was one in the 80s.
He did a song that got into the top 10 in the 80s. And I loved it so much. And there was, there was another song on the album called When We Were Fab.
Because they used to be called the Fab Four in the 60s. So I actually bought the album. I didn't, I didn't not like it.
But I didn't love it. But I liked that. Was it My Lord? Maybe that was the song.
I'm sure that was a different one to I only want to love you. I only want to kiss you. I only want to hold you, my sweet Lord, which is it's completely different to the actual song.
So, Paul McCartney, to be honest, well, I don't think the only Beatles album I've ever, ever purchased ever. Maybe Sgt. Pepper. But I did buy the Anthology number three.
And this was on tape. So this is in. I should listen to them in 1996 or 1990.
Yeah, 1996 97. And I used to listen to alternate between the Anthology number three, the Beatles Anthology, and Oasis, that album. What's the Story? Morning Glory.
And hmm. People now put in numbers on my on my Whatsit, my TikTok. So I don't know what that's all about.
Is it? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
I don't know. Did I buy? I bought one George Harrison song album. I never bought.
At least I don't remember ever buying a Paul McCartney album ever. And I don't think I definitely didn't buy a Ringo Starr album, if he made any. I think he might have done.
I didn't. I don't. I'm not even sure if I ever bought a John Lennon album either.
If I had done it would have been like, afterwards after he'd gone, because I was only I think it was 8080 1980 was 81. I have a memory of it. My memory is I was in high school, and it was 1981.
And everyone was like telling each other and it was during gym class and we were just getting changed after gym. And it was it was it was the big story of the day really. And it was because I think everyone my age would have grown up knowing who the Beatles were.
And probably all of our parents would have been like fans of them. Or maybe like one of the parents would have been a fan. Because some people, you know, they went sort of Rolling Stones are over the Beatles, but I don't think you got to choose between the two.
And it's completely different bands. Never really into the Rolling Stones. I don't know why.
I don't know what it was. This looks AI said videos for you. Well, the way you can tell that it's not AI, the face.
Why would I put why would someone do do an AI that looks like me? That would make no sense. I'd look a lot different if I was going to put an AI together. It would be, you know, it wouldn't be this.
That would be unless I was gonna like, yes, we're gonna make create an old man of a pink face. You're joking. Thanks.
But you see what I mean, though, it's like, if I would, I would definitely be I'll be handsome. I guess I'd have hair, a lot of it. And a nice tiny little nose.
If I had a beard, it would be dark. And probably have smaller is you know, I mean, I would definitely wouldn't be looking like this. God, man.
That's the thing. That's why I could never have. Do you know, some people have a portrait done, and then they have a picture on their wall of themselves.
No. I mean, sometimes, you know, I forget what I look like. I generally forget how old I am.
And I walk in the bathroom, and there's a mirror right to the left of me. And sometimes I make myself jump. Like, what's this old man doing? Oh, it's me.
And this isn't even like as a joke. I mean, I mean, once I was looking out the window. I think we was on holiday.
This was in Cornwall, and was on the ground floor. So I didn't really know the area. I heard something in the garden.
And it was a friend of mine invited me to go on holiday and she'd rented the house. And I looked at that and saw this face in the window like, really scared me until I realized it was my own reflection. I mean, that's why if I did get together with like, with a lady, she'd have to be physically healthy.
Because if you had any kind of medical complaints, imagine waking up and seeing me looking at it might like, I mean, it might be shocking. It did happen once actually, there was this. It was a medical emergency.
And it was just up the road. And the ambulance was there. But their equipment failed them.
And I had to do the electric shock thing to get the pulse back and their equipment and around the corner. In the old days, right, we used to have phone boxes with phones in them. Now we have phone boxes with and resuscitators, I forget what the correct name is now, in them.
And I heard what the one of the paramedics saying to the one of the other paramedics, just need to go around and need to phone in to get the code and go around and you know, get it and bring it back. And she looked over at me said, Oh, no, it's fine. You come over here.
So what she does, she had me look at him, this bloke, and it shocked him back to life. My face. So yeah.
So it's good. It's a power. It's a superpower.
It wasn't a real story, by the way. I think what it was, I was kind of trying to like, I don't do myself any favours by pointing out how the I don't like I've never been a fan of how I looked. But I didn't notice how I looked until I was probably a teenager.
I didn't care. And then I started getting spots. And I thought, Oh, and I became, I became aware of my body in junior school.
Not my face. And I only became aware of my voice. Like my accent in probably the last year or two of school.
Because someone asked me, why? Why do you speak different to us? And I realised I didn't have like a Suffolk, because I was living in Suffolk. I didn't have a strong Suffolk accent. I probably had some twang and stuff.
But I was born in North London. And then I lived in lived there for a couple years. Then I lived in Newcastle, pick up that accent for a few years.
Then I moved to Southend, Essex, and then I moved to Suffolk. But then I was going home to my dad and my dad has North London accent. My uncles and aunts had my nan all had North or London accents.
And my stepmom, she was, she didn't really have a Suffolk accent. She was quite well, not well spoken. That's I don't mean that in a bad way.
But she's not posh, but quite well. I don't know how to explain it. She's didn't have in where I lived.
There was two accents. There was proper Suffolk, like real kind of quite strong Suffolk accent, which is fine. And it's very lovable.
And people are spoke speak normally. Oh, dear. I'm getting some letters.
Dear Jason. Okay, right. Okay, right.
Here we go. People starting to send me stuff, which is weird. So I was gonna say, I got distracted from a really weird message.
But maybe I should get myself a moderator. But I don't have enough people coming in. Into my onto my TikTok in order to really do moderation.
Not really. I've had 868 likes. So that's nice.
Since I've been on it. Today. I'm trying to think did I? I don't think I ever bought a Paul McCartney album.
But then thinking about it. I wasn't much of a record buyer. When it came to singles.
I did sometimes, you know, like in the early 80s. Perhaps I would have got like Adam and the Ants and maybe Blondie and stuff like that. I don't know.
I'm not sure. Or maybe I'd have got tapes of their albums. I was really big into Shake and Stevens.
But I also loved Buddy Holly. The Monkees. Buddy Holly and the Monkees were two of my favorite albums.
And it's basically the greatest hits. And then I've got the greatest hits of madness. And that would became one of my favorite albums.
And this was in my like, early, early teens, like early to middle teens. No, I can't remember. So it's weird is not never bought a John Lennon album.
Never bought a Paul McCartney album, but I bought a George Harrison album. That seems a bit strange. I mean, there's nothing wrong with George Harrison, just you'd think out of all of them.
John Lennon or Paul McCartney would be the albums I would buy. And probably like Paul McCartney more because he was. He was a superstar as a solo artist, wasn't he? In the 80s.
Say, say, say what you want, but don't leave me with Michael Jackson and Ebony and Ivory. Ebony and Ivory. I like that song.
I had no idea what it was about. I thought it was just a nice song. I thought I was just singing about someone called Ebony and Ivory.
And they just why they sit next to what they say next, sit next to each other on a piano. Sad by sad on my piano. It's piano, isn't it? But pianos, I suppose it's OK.
I did like Stevie Wonder. I was a big, big fan of Stevie Wonder. I guess I grew up listening to him without knowing I was listening to him because there was a period of time when I was left in my, I would probably call it a crib.
I don't know. No, not a home. Like, you know, a baby's sleep, like a basket thing, not a basket, not a manger.
I could, you know, it's got bars on it, like a little prison cell. So I remember being in there. I mean, I might have been about five years old.
I mean, I think it was just. I wouldn't have been five though, would I? But I remember hearing Elvis Presley on the radio. You were always on my mind, always on my mind.
And another song, which I won't say the name of the person, but it was I love you, love you, love me to love. I love you, love me, love, which was a huge song. So we're talking early 70s.
And yeah, I'll just be there on my own looking at the clock. I don't know how long for I can't remember. Definitely had time to think.
That's the thing. I think we think that little kids don't think and they're just like, just brain like completely empty. I don't think that's the case.
I think it's just non ability to express how they're thinking, what they're thinking. It's just not in the same way as humans or adults, humans. So I would have grown up listening to Stevie Wonder on the radio without knowing who he was.
And then my first taste of Stevie Wonder in my memory would have been I just called to say I love you. No new year's day to celebrate. No chocolate covered candy bar to give away.
No April rain. So I like that song. But it's number one for about 100 years.
And it got a little bit too like, come on. It went on for a long time. And then the ebony and ivory.
I don't rightly know which one was first. That also got to number one. So that was they were the first two songs I remember.
I don't remember hearing lately and all the other stuff before. But I made up for it afterwards. The first time I really fell in love with Stevie Wonder was when he sung Overjoyed.
I think it was the last year of school. It was coming up to me leaving school. And it was a song called Overjoyed.
And I'm pretty sure he was sitting on a beach making a sandcastle. I think. And I just love that song.
Loved it. Loved it. Loved it.
Right. And I just I'm not sure when I started buying Stevie Wonder albums. Probably wasn't until I moved into the flat.
Because before that I was sleeping on the floor on a camper bed in my step mum's mum's flat. So I didn't have anything I didn't have. It was kind of my clothes were in a bag.
And you know, I didn't really have any kind of proper living conditions for a while. But when I moved into the flat above the chip shop, I I'm the conditions are all right. I mean, I had food and everything just I didn't have my own room.
That's what I mean. So I couldn't sort of chill out and listen to music and stuff like that. But when I got the flat above the chip shop, I started buying Stevie Wonder's albums.
And I got the the one with Overjoyed and Part Time Lover. And what was that? What the heck was that album called? It's weird. I remember all the others, I think it might be called Overjoyed.
So then I got Characters, which I think he released in 1987. And that was a brown cover. And I loved that.
Overjoyed, Circle, In Squared Circle. That was the name of the album In Squared Circle, which is one with Part Time Lover, Overjoyed and some others. I loved every single song on the album, and also on the Characters album.
And during that period, I got even more into Michael Jackson. So I had all of Michael Jackson's albums pretty much like the ones I was listening to the most. I'm not sure if I had Thriller.
Because Thriller was overdone. I mean, for me, it seemed like every time I turn the radio on, or turn the TV on, I went and saw Michael Jackson in concert, there he was singing. And the Thriller, like those songs, the you know, Top of the Pops, it was just like constant hymn.
So I kind of, I guess I didn't really, I got a little bit fed up with that album. And I didn't buy it because I didn't feel I needed to, because I felt like I knew all the songs off by heart. But then 1986 comes along, and Bad comes along.
And that was my favourite album. My favourite album ever, at a time, ever, anytime in the world, in time. That was it.
Loved Michael Jackson's Bad. Every song on it. Absolutely loved it.
So then I went back in time. Well, I didn't, but I went and bought an album. These were on tape, I got off the wall.
And I loved every song on that. And I never heard that album before. I mean, no doubt I'd heard some of the songs, but I just hadn't.
You know, like She's Out of My Life, stuff like that. I'd have heard those songs, but I hadn't really listened to like the whole thing. I've probably seen She's Out of My Life on Top of the Pops as well, in 1979 or whatever.
Then with Michael Jackson, in 19, when I was about 18, I got an album which was a Michael Jackson mix of him when he was a kid, when he was playing in the both the Jackson Five and in his own albums. And it was a mix of like, all the songs and then just like mixed into another song. Can't find that anywhere.
I've looked online. I've looked at his bibliography, you know, for his record, discography, whatever you want to call it. Not found that anywhere.
It's like it didn't exist. And then in 1991, his next album came out, Dangerous. Oh, my goodness.
Loved, loved, loved that album. Loved it, loved it, loved it, loved it. Absolutely loved it.
And it was so different from Bad. But I still loved every single song on there. Just completely, completely, completely loved the song.
Every song. And that was quite an important period of my life as well. And, you know, I was in London, I'd moved back to London and I was doing some stuff in there.
And I remember my memory, I don't know why, but I've got my memory connected with that period when I was working in the Elephant and Castle, working for a friend who owned a record shop inside the Elephant and Castle shopping centre. So he paid me to be outside in the freezing cold, selling tapes. And so he, because, you know, he used to sell rare records and he had all these tapes that he didn't know what to do with.
So I think he was just helping me out, to be fair. So I had two tables full of tapes and I was selling them and I was playing music as well. And I was standing in there all day, freezing cold.
But it was one of the most fun times I've had. I really enjoyed it. It was very free, very freeing.
Not being stuck inside, not being told what to do, because he was pretty chilled out. He was just a happy bloke. He was just enjoying his life.
And afterwards, we'd go for a drink and we'd go to a comedy club. You know, he kind of, yeah, that's how I met him, at the comedy club. It's strange.
But for some reason, when I think of Dangerous, the album, I think of that period of my life, that particular period, which didn't last long. It was only the end of the year, I think end of 91. I was like, when I was young myself back then, I was just like, oh, I was, I was having a good time.
Didn't have no money, but I was, because I'd lost my other job, I got kicked off my other job. So this was just like a temporary thing. But it, it really did the trick.
Got me through to Christmas. Yeah. Unless I started after Christmas.
I don't know. It was a winter anyway. So pretty sure it was 91, just December time.
There might have even been some snow. And the bloke who owned the record shop, he was quite wealthy because he was selling records for some sort of thousands of pounds, some of them, like really rare stuff. He'd been doing it since he was a kid.
And he was probably in his 30s at this point. He was, he reminded me, I think his hero was, what's his name? The Virgin Man. Not Peter Stringfellow.
The Virgin Man, the, oh, because he used to own, he started a shop, didn't he? Selling records. And he started off, I think he started selling secondhand records. And then he kind of built up into a big, massive, you know, massive store around the country and around the world.
Virgin, and then the airplanes and then mobiles. It's not Peter, why do I keep thinking Peter Stringfellow? I know he's got his own island. Someone says, I'd love to send you a copy of the album.
I don't know where it goes, but I'm currently using it. That's cool. Thank you.
Thanks for the thought. So the next Michael Jackson album was History. And that was a double album.
And that was released in 1995. And to start with, I thought, oh, it's just a bunch of the old songs. Because this, the first album is, is it two albums? Or is it just two sides? I think it's two, double album.
So the first one, one, one album is just a lot of his greatest hits from, from the past, or from the future, from the past, and including songs from Thriller, Off The Wall and Bad. And I think at the time I thought, well what have I just paid for? I don't want to listen to them, I can listen to them anyway. But then what I thought is, okay, I'll skip those and I'll just go to the other album.
Let's listen to, because it's got new stuff on there. Again, I loved every single song. Every song instantly, like it wasn't kind of, there's been some songs that I've watched, watched, that I've listened to, and some albums that I just had to kind of, I had to build up to liking them in a weird way.
And there's been a few songs like that, that I just didn't like at the beginning, but ended up loving. Yeah, there's been a few like that. I think the one is Drunken In Love with Beyonce.
The first time I heard that song, I thought, what on earth did my ears just endure? Which seems cruel, you know, because bear in mind she is how amazing she is. But I just didn't get that song. It was so off kilter, so different from anything I'd heard her do.
Not that I'm a massive, huge fan as far as I've never bought her albums. But after hearing it a few times, it's become one of my favourite songs that she does. That she's done.
It's such a good song. I loved it. And, and also I remember when Rihanna and Drake released, is it Drake, released a song called Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, or just Work, one of them.
And the newspaper released, it was talking about it, Rihanna's new song, Here Are The Lyrics. This is before she'd even released it, or before anyone had really heard it. And it's like, Work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work.
And then it'd be ha yeah work work work work work now on paper it looked absolutely ridiculous and they were mocking they were mocking the song obviously and then seeing the video and hearing a song it is exactly that her going work work work like a lot but it worked good pun isn't it it really did work and and I liked it and the chemistry between her and Drake not I mean it just seemed to if they were if they're acting it was very good acting because they're really not really
yeah Rihanna it's yeah it's I think they've I don't know if they've ever had I ever had a thing it was nothing to do me but I do love her though I love Rihanna my friend don't like her or my friend I used to live here he he was in London and they were I think they were in a kebab shop and all these heavies came in and removed everyone so that Rihanna could go in and get a kebab she just come out of a nightclub or something this is in
a West End and she was like surrounded by all these heavy security and they literally wouldn't let anyone into the kebab shop while she was in there even though they got no got no right to do that but you know any since then he just couldn't stand her like come on it's not her fault I mean she's gonna be I mean think about it if you I don't mean this in a bad way if she's going somewhere and you wanted to get some fish and chips and there's a queue and
you could go right to the front of the queue you'd kind of want to wouldn't you I would no I wouldn't want like people heavies coming in and pushing people out and stuff depends how hungry I was but I think what I would do though it's like if I was in that position to get to the head of the queue to get food first pay for everyone else's food you know maybe do that as a gesture like the Milky Bars are on me kind of situation I'm just fantasizing about it
because it's never gonna happen although it did happen oh wow when I was in Bulgaria we got chatting I mean my friends that went together we got chatting in a bar upstairs in the hotel to a lady and she was I think she was English like English because speak Romanian and Bulgarian sorry so we got talking to her well I didn't know they did and she said well why don't you come back to downstairs we've got a bar that all the staff go to so all of the hotels there's a
few hotels like linked to it together underground funny enough you get to the different hotels it's a bit like the hospitals in London got big underground like that you can get between honestly it's amazing what's underneath those hospitals and so they invited us to go to this club which was got a full bar and it's big old room and it's where all the staff went after work so they'd go there like after 11 or 12 or whatever time the bars closed and I thought okay everyone was up for that so
cool so we went along saw some of the members of staff you know they were in the restaurant or in the hotel so I sort of said hello in that we walked up to the bar and I got we got some drinks and then someone all the seats were took and somebody and we're just standing there we didn't need a seat someone came up to someone from the bar went up to that some people sitting down and said told him to get off the seats so we didn't know that they
said that to them always all we knew is so I came over to him and I think about six people got up and moved to another part of the of the room it's quite a big room and I asked the lady I said well what happened there my friends all sitting down happy and they said we're not allowed to stand up we're not allowed to sit down on seats if we have customers come down here so if you're a resident in the hotel which you are or in any of these
hotels we have to give our seating up for you and I said are they okay with that and she said no they don't like it but they do it they don't like doing it and I thought so what I did I said can you come with me walked over to the people that just walked off and I said can you tell them that we don't care they don't like it and stay over there nodding I said just explain to them that they can come back and sit down we'll move they
don't have to move their seats I probably should have mentioned this to the people I was with but for me this was the right thing to do you don't take someone's seat it's just like we had no this was out of hours no one should have been drinking this was a you know it wasn't even legal no one should have been drinking alcohol or serving alcohol at that time of night so we're all breaking the law in fact we'd have got in more trouble because we were foreigners and after that
I said they said no no I said well let me buy you a drink so they came over to the bar they chatted with us so they kind of stayed with us some of them ended up sitting down on our seat some didn't but the tension in the room went because everyone was looking at us as we were walking in there's a little bit of tension I could feel the tension a little bit and then it kind of you know they weren't quite got on what they were doing but as
soon as those six or seven people were asked to move from the seating I could feel the tension I could see that everyone was looking now everyone there was people that were working in those hotels so they all I guess knew each other and we're looking at us and look at and there was only I think what six of us and I thought no no no no no no how can you they were drunk the people as we've probably a bit drunk I might been a bit drunk but how can
you enjoy yourself knowing that you've you tread on people's toes like that so yeah that's why I kind of went over to say come come back baby come back and I said look if you need want to sit down we can move for you and and let's get you drinks and just apologize we don't we don't do that and then some of the people that are looking at me that I was with like yeah yeah we don't do that because they realized there was probably a hundred hundred people in that
room that were watching so maybe I put them a little bit on the spot I might be making parties up to make myself look better I hope I am but definitely did say to them like come back you know we're not taking your seats that's out of order you know don't play that game because yeah this this was their time they'd finished work they wanted to relax and we were in cringing upon their their space but at the same time we was invited to go there by a member of staff
so hey what can you do well that's what we did and after that they were cool everyone was so nice because they realized that we weren't we weren't taking advantage of the situation hmm what's that got to do the Beatles you may ask I don't know how should I know what's I don't know I don't never know I never know oh when I was talking about the having that babysitting job like during the night and taking her to school in the morning the reason I was mentioning that is because well
that that was one of the reasons I was going to mention that is because when I was staying there they had a really nice stereo system and they had Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Heart Club band album and I used to listen to it over and over again when they weren't there and one of the songs I really really loved was what did I like I can't remember now picture yourself on a boat on a river was it that one she's leaving home it's getting better all the time no another day anyone
what's the one that's kind of broke into two songs this we've tangerine and marshmallow clouds being people being people people being people people back people people he's getting better all the time I don't know anyway there was some that I really liked listening to it make more the story be a bit more complete if I actually knew what song it was and then that's like sitting sitting in a car in a road on a river no it's the same thing he's sitting in the car it was John Lennon singing anyway
maybe they both sung but he was singing the next bit the anthology now 1996 the anthology I didn't have the first two I bought the third one on tape and it was a double album was it for I think it was a double album and I'd never heard well first of all I'd never heard all the album well as a lie I had heard all the albums but not like on purpose if that makes any sense because my dad had all the albums and they'd be played and I think my
oldest brother used to have the albums as well although he was predominantly an Elvis Presley fan I think he also loved the Beatles as well because he was born like 66 so he was alive during the Beatles kind of still around so he'd he'd at least be hearing it when he was a toddler I mean when he was like growing up as when he's like firstborn the first three years of his life and Big G is surfing a boat on a river no it's not the one so yeah I that's
a good thing about though about what I'm doing because you're always gonna know it's not AI no I mean I suppose someone could do this but doing these long form recordings to create this on AI first of all it wouldn't look like this it wouldn't sound like this it wouldn't you know it would cost an absolute fortune to do an hour and a half video recording just an audio recording but to put together that using voice cloning besides I own my own voice so yeah I cloned my voice but not
for this just who knows I mean if I was to lose my voice at some point then I might go to use AI but everyone wouldn't know I was doing AI but I would write this stuff myself and then put it into an audio as a podcast audio and so it'd still be me but I don't do that hopefully I won't ever have to but I think there's gonna come a time when people will and I'm not long not probably not a long away either where people start to appreciate humans
with all our flaws and watching someone that coughs and sneezes and stutters and doesn't then has gaps between the words or between the sentences and doesn't look perfect and makes mistakes you know this kind of thing is it's gonna be I think with videos and stuff and podcasts it might come to the point where everything is almost perfect you know every every words pronounced correctly although with AI it's hard to get it to pronounce words correctly at the moment but if you listen to the YouTube videos it's amazing how some
of the words are pronounced you know that's one way you can know for sure it was an AI overdub or AI voiceover so voiceovers will be gone soon humans doing voiceovers I don't know if hardly anybody uses voiceovers on videos anymore like like a real voice I think a lot of it's just clone voices or you can use standard voices and choose from one and put in your script and it might be a five minute video 10 minute video and it's done for you quite quick easy and it might sound
quite good because it's improving all the time but I'm kind of the antidote to that not that an antidote is needed and a lot of people are gonna love that they're gonna be happy and they'll be happy with the fakeness of it and just not want I mean a lot of people aren't gonna want to listen to someone talking slowly or waffling on which is kind of what I do this is a reason for what I do and there's a point to it but not everybody's they might think oh just
rather listen to an AI and people start getting used to the AIs but then it's gonna be some people think you know what I want to watch a human I want to watch a living being plus you get to watch me get old see you get to watch me get old and older and older and eventually become like a fossil that's the benefit see I mean if you look if you go on to YouTube there's videos of me from 1997 seriously I had hair dark curly hair and a beard not
one bit of gray and I miss those days I do and I don't because back then things weren't great some things were good some things weren't I suppose like always but it is nice to have my own bathroom my own toilet my own kitchen my own living room my own bedroom my own little dog my own TV you know my own sofa my desk I've got the equipment I need to make these recordings see this is kind of it's not quite the setup that I was hoping for back you know
20 years ago in other ways it's probably much more than I expected because you know to be honest when I started doing this in 2006 I probably did not expect to be still doing it 20 years later that is probably a little bit of a surprise to me I say probably I should know really shouldn't I or it would be a surprise to me if I could go back and talk to that version of myself in 2006 and say you realize I'm still doing this in 20 years and when I
came back I would be a lot more successful because if that version of me in 2006 knew that I would still be doing this in 20 years then there's certain things I would have done differently and would have had a bit more confidence and I wouldn't have deleted things because I had a I had a YouTube channel that was starting to become successful in you know in my world anyway and I was getting more more subscribers every day more and more I was getting more video views it's starting to grow
and then I deleted the YouTube channel which wasn't ideal I just had a I had a blip and I deleted it I think 2013 I think and I started this one I think about seven years ago this YouTube channel and I put no effort into it really until recently I go through little periods and I got like 1,000 is it 1,600 subscribers something like that I can't remember was it 1,300 1,000 it's something it's over a thousand I think it's 1,600 it'd be nice if on the YouTube channel I've got
now it'd be nice if I could get like 10,000 subscribers by the end of the year just just it'd be nice you know be a nice little tickle you know you know I mean and then the next target will be a hundred thousand then I guess half a million then a million that would be quite cool I don't know how it would happen because predominantly I've been audio based for the last 15 years or well not 15 years so what 11 years 10 11 years mainly just podcasts although I had
my YouTube channel I started and occasionally I make videos but now I seem to have kind of got back into the making videos again so is yeah I'm not sure did I buy her I was I listened yeah I never got to listen to the first two anthology albums of the Beatles because I loved the third one so much and I just loved it just loved it I don't know what it was and swapping it over with Oasis I listened to the both of them kind of back-to-back on my journey
to work when I was a security guard and it's kind of yeah it's nice I don't listen to them while I was working as well because I was there all night as a security guard and if only the internet had been around back then oh my gosh life would have been easier I could have done so much with my time instead of well I found reading difficult because of reading during the night I used to get tired eyes but I think if I was actually doing something like talking and working
on a website or something like that I could have kept myself actively busy you know kept my brain like functioning but you know if I was to read a book now because I didn't have any glasses I don't think back then if I was to read music and read a book now I'd get tired reading it I probably I mean I do need to get some new glasses or at least get an eye test yeah I'm just trying to think other things about the Beatles I mean there's been a quite
a few songs haven't now come out over the years and that sort of been in the vaults was a one like blackbird or something not blackbird but it was about bird bluebird bird la la la la la la and I'm pretty much sure that I mean they were releasing new songs in the 90s from the Beatles weren't they it's getting better all the time nope and I think it would have been really interesting to have been around in those days when the Beatles were first around you know but that would
make me a lot older so you know but just to have I don't know to experience it just to feel what it really felt like because not only were they hugely famous but they were also controversial as was Elvis Presley when he came out he was loved but he was also kind of hated as well by groups of people so it'd be interesting to see just to kind of experience that because I've experienced certain crazies over the years and probably one of the major ones I mean is Wham the boy
band and Take That was huge but Wham was like massive but one of the biggest bands the biggest you know and they they weren't around for a long time was Bros and this is like 1988 Bros was they just huge absolutely the most fame not worldwide but in this country the most famous band in the country almost like instantly and they're only laughing 19 at the time and then they had a couple of albums and then that was kind of that was the bubble burst see what they didn't do which
is what people do now bands do now is they let people buy tickets for months and months and months and months and months in advance they was they sold out Wembley on more than one occasion really quickly I mean they were they were sort of doing stadiums straight away because they were so so famous and but no one seemed to plan ahead see if they'd have filled out stadiums at the heart of their career they said okay we're gonna do another tour next year in January maybe they just finished their
tour in July we're gonna do another one in January February we're gonna do one at Wembley and we're gonna do a whole country from January all the way through to like I don't know October around the country and then people would buy the tickets and they'd be looking forward to going to see Bros their favorite band and then they'd be invested not just to buy their next album to support their band and they're gonna love the songs because they love the band so much and that expectation of it being brilliant
is enough for them to enjoy it sometime I'd be like yeah the likelihood of them loving the new albums much higher when the expectations there but also the investment of going into the concert and booking it so far ahead of time means that they kind of have to go out and buy their records it's it's like a psychological thing isn't it there to be and that that techniques used now with bands where you can you you can book a band long way in advance I mean some West End shows I
think they have years of bookings you have to wait years to watch a show so which means you never ever you're not gonna run out anyone that's willing to wait a year to watch a show is pretty much gonna turn up and if in the meantime if that show if decides to release a song from the show that person waiting for that show is pretty much guaranteed to buy or purchase that that song it's just from a psychological perspective I guess on gif I mean the Beatles I don't think they
even owned the rights to their own songs I think Apple didn't they sell to to Sony so every time the Beatles sing they have to give give certain amount of money to Sony Records or something which is weird how can you buy the rights to a song that you've written how can someone else buy the rights to a song that you've written makes no sense to me it's probably a bit more to it than just what I said maybe it was the I mean John Lennon is the Lennon-McCartney partnership it's
some of them half the money or whatever if there's a 50 split of the right in royalties would go to John Lennon's family or Yoko Ono isn't it and then to Paul McCartney but didn't I think Michael Jackson bought the rights to the back catalogue of the Beatles so and I guess he must have sold it on to Sony maybe that was always weird though apparently like Michael Jackson was in huge amounts of debt until he left and he was not in debt anymore I mean like because the amount of
money he was making from record sales it's just not it's just weird isn't it really the way it works I mean Mike Tyson you know these people say oh Mike Tyson what's he doing getting into the ring at 59 years old and and apart from the fact he's earning like 20 million or whatever to do it why did he get in the ring with Roy Jones a few years ago why did he do the things he's doing well Mike Tyson even though he earned huge amounts of money when he was
a world champion and also you know when he was boxing basically he always would have been one of the highest paid boxers even when he wasn't world champion because he was a big draw big to draw as well if you had a piece of paper he left a big piece of paper and he it basically lost everything he got bankrupt and stuff and he lost all his money and but he didn't just lose money he owed money that he was never going to be able to pay back so when he
worked or did anything got paid he could only keep a certain amount and he had to give the rest to the taxman or tax person and then he did some other stuff which eventually meant that he was ahead and he had opportunities and he took them. Vinnie's snoring. Can you hear him? That's Vinnie.
Proper snore. He's listening now. Guaranteed when I say the last bit that I normally say when I finish this recording he'll pop up sometimes he has the odd dreams you know they'll start again.
I was talking about the Beatles so yeah the Beatles I would say yeah my favorite album is Sgt Pepper they're all good albums but there's some songs that I didn't I can't say that I enjoyed I mean if you listen to their greatest hits it's huge such a huge amount of songs but then I don't know by focusing on some of the other songs they weren't the same level they don't didn't seem up to the same standard as the hits if that makes sense so yeah I just had to have
a little cough there and some water it gets a little stuffy in here because I've got all these lights on the doors closed and the windows closed I normally have the window open so it gets a little bit like oh and it's like a tiny room or anything but and his hair is kind of you know sometimes his hair's loose not my hair his hair Vinnie so you know so it will lie on me you know his hair comes out because ginger and that's not why his hair comes out she's
ginger but he's it's in the air isn't that you know the little tiny hairs and stuff the hair is in the air yeah so what was I gonna say I can't think of anything else regarding the Beatles I just loved them oh yeah I remember when I was in junior school I applied to join the school choir and the lady the music teacher said yeah would you want I said she might not have said it like that but said I was wondering if I can join the school choir please miss
and she said yeah you can but can you come and see me later on cuz I'm right now I'm trying to do a poo so and she can you get out the toilet so apparently that wasn't convenient time for her and when I was looking up you know under the door but anyway so I went saw June lunch break and she said I try to eat my sandwiches can you get out the staff room okay wait a minute when's a good time she said we can come after school if you
want we can come and you know so I went saw her after school and sat at the table and just said to like can I kind of not volunteer what's the right rehearse not rehearse audition can I read to audition now and she said no no I'm at home eating a dinner with my family how did you get in my house no she didn't she said yeah yeah okay so good because it was a piano in the like the the hall I guess the assembly hall there was a stage like
it was a really nice school that I went to this this little school and the infant school junior school I went to three different junior schools in this town and this was the best one I think I was there for two years from 9 to 11 or 9 yet 9 and 10 and I sung Michelle I think she played the music and she said what do you want to sing I said behind the green door by shaking Stevens and she said no that's not really a choiry song is it I
said but I can do the dance she said no no we don't need you to do the dance I said you haven't seen me do the dance she said well okay what what dance is that and so I said well you need to turn around to see it because you know why'd you want me to see me unless you've got eyes in the back of your head and I realized at that point that she actually was turned around she's had a really hairy face but anyway no and I I said
okay you sure you want me to see my dance she said yeah so this is my shaking Stevens dance and I can't really show you on here but I'm singing you don't know what you do behind the green door and then I dropped down to my knees I screamed and I jumped up again the green door and was more like the green door and then back up again the green door and she said doesn't that hurt your knees I said yeah why are you doing it if it hurts your knees
I said it's all part of the art it's I just think it's important to me for me to get into the role I'm a method actor you see she said but this is you're just auditioning for a choir in a junior school firstly you don't need to drop down to your knees generally this is not it's not Catholic school and secondly you don't have to you don't have to dance you know this is not it's not like we're not dancing around this this is not that kind of choir you know
although those choirs are good or that's if I was gonna go to church that's the kind of church I want to go to I want to go to church you know with those people in a choir like singing like soul oh man that's like Whitney Houston kind of singing that's what I want to see you might be thinking which one of us are talking to this this is just me not me back then or the teacher that's an aside and she said no I don't need you to drop down to
your knees besides you're gonna feel that when you get older and I said I feel it now me but it hurts she laughed and called an ambulance so she said what songs you want to sing then I said got behind the green door I said no I've been through that you're 10 years old now you should be able to focus on the conversation I said all right think about it now what would you like to sing I said well what about a Beatles song she said okay it can't be a
fast song you know it has to be a kind of slow melody a love song or something like that I said okay she said what have you chosen I said behind the green door it's not it's not a Beatles song is it I said they might have sung it but they didn't sing it so how do you know they didn't sing it because they didn't but it was Valley Valentine or whatever his name is that sung that start with Frankie Vaughn or something like that and he sung it in the
60s so maybe the Beatles because they did copy other artists and they did sing they didn't sing their original songs to start with they you know they were singing other songs and even Elvis songs I think some of the rock and roll stuff so you know they weren't original when they first started out a teacher said look I need to go home soon what is it what is it you want to do do you want what do you want to sing or should we just put this off to another another
year I said no no I'll do it can I have another look through the book I said yeah he said yeah there you go because you had this book of songs that she could play I'm not saying they're the only songs that she could play but she wanted me to sing something that's quite simple I'll just let you know that anyone thinks that foams coming out my wall it's not it's just the back into soundproof like I wouldn't notice it thanks for that though can you imagine turning around I saw
this stuff coming out on my wall I'm gonna be covering a wall up soon so you won't never know who's there you're thinking I wonder how big his room is it might go on for inches might go on for three inches and we all know that so that's a long that's a long space so my teacher said so what what do you want to sing then after me looking at the book for another 10 minutes I said behind the green door and she looked at me and I said no I'm
joking I'm joking I'm joking okay so what do you want I said can I do a Christmas song I suppose you could do a Christmas song it's lots of hymns and stuff that young carols and choirs sing I said okay so I'd like to do here is Merry Christmas everybody's having fun look to the future that one where one screams it's Christmas and she said no because that's not a gentle song what about the spaceman said what spaceman she said what do you mean spaceman I never wanted you to go
into spaceman I said no not that one that's not released until I think the 90s she said oh okay I said no it's Christy Berg she said what lady in red I said no not lady more yeah Kim him but not not that song it's a spaceman it's a Christmas song that I've only heard recently which I quite liked didn't even know it's Christy Berg I think it was from the 70s she said no so why not she said I've never heard of it I said well it's in this book
can't you play every song that's in this book she said I can't play every song in the world besides it's not in that book I said it is she's where is it I said well it's there and she said where I said it's there she said where I said I should open the page show me and I pointed she said I say it's there she said no that's that's not the song that's Silent Night why are you saying this it was not there at all I said no I lied I
don't know why I just sometimes I like to tell fibs she said why I don't know I mean do you know when I said I wanted to audition for the choir she said yeah I said I didn't really mean it why she said I just I thought maybe spending some time with you and absorb your power to play the piano because we've got a piano at home you see my stepmom plays it and I thought it would be really good if after Sunday lunch I just jumped out of my chair
and said listen to this everyone and started playing behind the green door on the piano something like that I said what I said oh it doesn't matter and how about she said how about a Beatles song but like a ballad I said all right and she's waiting for me like I just like just stood there yeah and she said have you got one I said yeah okay she said well point point to me in a book which it is so there you go she said that's Silent Night I said I
don't know where it is which one you looking for I don't know she said well should I choose it for you she said I said yeah right then so she said let's do Michelle very very young quick in making a mind up up up first you gotta turn it on then you gotta turn it around so that's another thing we were the we were the Eurovision Song Contest winners England back in was it 82 or 81 with Bucks Fizz but they did also go on to sing the land of make-believe
oh look around did it did it did it nice to see Superman the land of make-believe in a way I prefer that song but making your mind up was so much fun energetic and we won although I do think Lulu won it in the 60s didn't she like with shout didn't she did she win the Eurovision back in the 60s I don't know I wasn't around back then so my teacher says why don't you do Michelle by the Beatles I said it's best Paul McCartney does that one she said yes
it's the Beatles I said no it's Paul McCartney she said yeah but it's the Beatles said no it's Paul McCartney he's the one that sings it she said I know he's the one that sings it but it's still the Beatles it's a Beatles song so how can it be a Beatles song if Paul McCartney's the one that sings it and she couldn't answer that she said well yeah John Lennon and Paul McCartney write songs together I said okay did they write that song together or did Paul McCartney write that song
the same as he did with Hey Jude and she really backed her into a corner she didn't realize I was so knowledgeable about what was I knowledgeable about oh yeah Paul McCartney I think it must have been an interest in life for Paul McCartney just in a sense to be so famous so quickly so internationally famous and so rich and so talented it must have been but bearing in mind where he was from he was my working-class background he had zero preparation really for what was about to come must have
been such a huge shock when it did happen for all of them all four of them and they dealt they dealt with it quite well didn't they and my teacher said look it's nice to hear all about the biography of the Beatles but can you sing the song please that's okay I sung the song and she said right you're in providing you don't ever talk again okay so yeah I was it I was in the the what's it the choir it was all right I suppose I wouldn't say it was
life-changing but it was definitely it was a thing you know it's I mean it's quite late in my career as a junior school person because I go into high school you know in a few months time but it was it was quite nice I did apply for I auditioned for some roles in the school plays in high school but I never got in any I don't think they realized just how I don't know I think I could have been quite a good actor maybe maybe not I don't know but for
me because I used to do drama as a subject for the last two years of school or three years two years and for me it was just a skive it was the last two episodes on a Friday and maybe a couple of episodes cut episodes last two classes on a Friday and maybe a couple of classes in the week as well and it was just it was just fun I didn't take it seriously I didn't I just yeah you know I mean it's a shame as I think back to the
past usually it's hard to think back to the future if I think back to the past I do sometimes wish that I'd gone down the road of doing extra work because I did do an extra job when I was in 1997 probably about October time and I had two jobs at the same time so I was an extra in this movie that was Billy Connolly was in he was starring in it and I don't know if Bob Hoskins was in I don't know but it was they were just filming I
think for the day that was it it was a bar scene that's all it was and loads of people can't believe how many people were in there cameras the cameras were literally in their face so close to their faces and so that was I was I was queuing up and I was a yes I was in a movie forgot about that so I was an extra but also I was looking after the bar as well and the club for my friend who owned the club make sure that no one took
stuff so I was I was getting paid twice I mean the extra work was it's like 10 quid or something and probably the same for doing that but still I've never been paid twice for doing the same job before and had to be and also because they were doing it on a day where we're open in the evening the club is going to be open in the evening I had to make sure that they were out and everything was gone by like six o'clock so it's good I could start shouting
I didn't shout but I can everyone get out oi Connolly get out now or you begin get out I wonder who is in it with him I don't ever remember this the film being released but didn't meet it's ironic when I read it this is a story but I met this lady at the time and kind of fell for her and I went she was a comedian as well so I used to go and see her gigs for a little bit and we talk on the phone and I got her
a little job in the club doing some admin stuff and we kind of lost touch because there was no I don't know why to be honest and she came into the club one night and I was so excited to see her and I was looking forward to having a chat with her but then didn't get a chance to and she had to go out early had some kind of emergency to go out and never saw her again weirdly enough weird I kind of came over her on YouTube no Facebook so
I might be looking up her name just as comedians that's like wonder if she's still doing comedy and whatever and this video came up and it was a hypnotist a female hypnotist doing stage hypnosis and doing that stuff right she looked actually I could tell from the way she was talking there was her got a same voice and well that was a bit of a bang sorry about that if it's streaming I forgot we had people streaming I just clapped my hands okay so Vinnie was just barking so and I
caught up with her on Facebook just said hi but she didn't remember me didn't remember me at all and I felt a little bit sad especially as she's kind of gone into the like hypnosis and gone into that world that I've been in while still in I guess and just just I don't know didn't recall me at all this felt sad so a few years back and oh well I'm clearly not that memorable am I hmm so I am gonna go so thank you for listening remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve
to be happy and be gentle with yourself you deserve to feel safe and also remember that you are already enough already enough you're going to be okay lots of love bye
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.