(Long | Music) #1585 Let me bore you to sleep | Jason Newland | 2nd April 2026

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

Vinnie is underneath the table, joining in by chewing on something. He is my co-host, or as he likes to call it, I am his co-host. But that's a little bit rude, I do believe.

And today is Thursday the 2nd of April 2026. If you enjoy what I do, please send a PayPal gift, that would be much appreciated, to cover the £200 a month it costs me to run this free service. I also have two websites, I've got jasonnewland.com, which is my podcast website, so all my latest recordings are on there that you can stream.

And I have an online store called jasonnewland.store, where my recordings are available to download. I'm still in the process of organising that website, and it's going to take a long time. But every time I do a new recording, it is available on the store to download for free.

And there's thousands on there available already. I've got a YouTube channel, I've got a Facebook group called Jason Newland's Boring Group. And my podcasts are on all the main podcast hosts, apps etc, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, you name it, it's there.

And I do six versions of each recording, three without music, three with music, short, long and overnight. I think my introductions are getting shorter. I got an email, not an email, was it a text? Yeah, a text message.

I think it was last night saying, from the universal credit place, which is the benefits, we need to know any changes to your rent, let me let us know what your rent is. And so I'm thinking, Oh, what am I going to do? I've got it in front of me. So I thought I might as well let you know, while we're here.

And let's have a look what the text said. Oh, yes, it was a hub 1938. So it's 20 to eight last night.

You must confirm your housing costs for this year. Even if your rent will remain the same, sign into your online account and check your to do list. Wow, okay.

I guess it's just, I just would have thought that some kind of communication going on between them. But luckily, I kept hold of the letter that I received on or that was sent to me on the 6th of March. I probably didn't get it till about the 12th of March because normally takes about 10 to 11 days to receive a letter from the council for some reason.

I don't know why. And this is dated the 6th of March 2026. To Mr. J. Newland, an agent for you on behalf of the council, your landlord, I hereby give you notice.

I was worried whenever I've had a letter from a landlord giving me notice, that normally means that I'm about to be, you know, kicked out. Luckily, that's not the case this time. You have three months to vacate the premises.

And from the 6th of April 2026, the changes payable under the tenancy of the above premises will be varied. Details of the current and new charges are as follows. And you know what, in the past, I was on ESA, didn't I get these letters, and I probably chucked them out.

Well, because it was just getting paid. I didn't think I'd need to keep this information. So I'm so glad I did now.

Because, you know, I've only been on Universal Credit since the summer. And I didn't know they'd be asking for this stuff. So here's what it was last year, or the current, and then what's going to be.

A basic rent, £100.80. This is weekly. Community, communal cleaning, £1.03 a week. Communal electricity, £1.35. So that's just for the hallways, lights.

Community caretakers, £1.33. What, what, what caretakers? I mean, I thought that was the cleaners. The only time anyone comes in here is to clean, and that's probably every two weeks, if that. Caretakers, okay.

Emergency light testing, £0.66 a week. They must be in and out pretty quickly, because they're not making much money, are they, on that one. Grounds maintenance, £2.04 per week.

So I'm paying, well, you know, technically two, what is that, £2 times by 50. It's £100, £600 for the six flats. So £600 is being paid for the lawn to be mowed four times a year, if that.

I mean, I do do a few other bits as well, to be fair, but generally, yeah, it's not too bad. Not a bad little deal for them, considering it's only a tiny little bit of grass, really. I could skip across it.

In fact, if I was like a younger man, I reckon one, two, three, four strides, or four hops, maybe not hops, but like big long, you know, one leg to the other. I reckon about four and a half of them from one end to the other would do it. So it gives you, you know, it's not a lot of grass.

It takes minutes for them to do the grass. They're on to a winner, I think, on that one. It's good money.

You think £600, I don't know, so it's £100 a time, let's say. Let's say it comes six times a year. It's possible, but I don't think they do, but maybe they do.

£100 a time for 10 minutes. Emergency, okay, and then you've got window cleaning, £0.27 a week. So this isn't for my windows, this is for the communal windows, of which there are two upstairs, I guess one downstairs, and maybe the windows on the doors.

Yeah, so it's, yeah, £0.27 a week. So it's been changed. So now the basic rent from the 6th of April, I've put in the 1st of April on the online form because they wouldn't allow a date ahead.

And I thought if I don't do it now, I'm not going to, I might not remember to do it on the 6th of April. And then they might tell me off for not informing them of changes. So I've just put it in from the 1st of April.

Basic rent is now, instead of £100.80, it's £105.64. The communal cleaning, instead of £1.03, is £1.17. The communal electricity, instead of £1.35, is now £1.07. It's gone down. I wonder how they managed that. And what else? Communal caretakers has gone down again as well.

Instead of £1.33, it's £1.18. The emergency light testing is the same price, £0.66 a week. Ground maintenance is gone up. So it was £2.04, it's now £2.41. And I mean, they're probably predicting more grass next year.

I don't know. Window cleaning, £0.27, gone up £0.02 to £0.29 a week. So basically, what it means from now on is, basic weekly rent is £105.64. Eligible weekly service charges, £6.78. Ineligible weekly service, ineligible? Why would you even put ineligible? I mean, what is that? Just something written down that they can't understand.

What's this after grounds maintenance? It's just a squiggle. I don't know. It's ineligible.

I don't know. How does that work? It's a total weekly rent, £112.42, which is very, very, very cheap for a one bedroom flat in this area. So what I did, I went online, right? And I put it in.

What is the rent? So I put £105.64. And I went to the next page, and said, what is your total whatever? The Yeah, I did off the bottom back of the form. What is your total week? What's your service charges? So £6.78, coming to £112.42. And then the next page said, are you sure that's how much rent you pay in a month? I was about to post yes, and I thought, a month?

What do you mean a month? And I got a little bit confused because they wanted monthly. The letter I received was weekly.

And then I thought, what am I going to do here? Now, some of you might think, well, it's easy. You divide it by 700 and then divide it times it by six and take away five. Well, I didn't think that way.

You know, I thought, I'm not sure how to do this. I thought, well, divide it by 52. So do the rent separate and divide it by 50, times it by 52, sorry, and then divide it by 12.

But then I had a little niggle. A little voice came from my left ear, saying it was a weird place to come from. It said, look, why don't you just read the form? If you want to know what the form says, read the form, read the instructions.

Think of all the different games and gadgets that you've destroyed and broken because you didn't read the instructions. I'm like, wow, why are you having a go at me? So I just want you to just just for once read the form. It's not a big form, just one form.

Okay, so I read the letter that I got through. And on it, it said a part that I missed that I saw the second time. Okay, I didn't miss it.

I didn't read it the first time. The rent free weeks for this year are 21st of December 2026 and 29th of March 2027. I didn't know that they two weeks without paying rent.

Blimey. So I then realised I'm going to have to do 50 weeks. Yeah, I got a calculator, I took two off of 52.

And came up with 48. So I'm not quite sure what happened there. But then you know, for 50.

And it works out 140 something a month for the rent, like 440 something for the month for the rent and 600 and whatever 690 or 700 for the 700 sick, that's 70 or 80 pound for the the week, you know, the charges. And so I filled that in and sent it and I thought okay, that's done. And yeah, I filled that in and that was good.

And I thought I did receive a letter about council tax exemption notice. For the next year. I got that on the 1st of March.

Well, it was it was dated the 1st of March. I probably got it around the middle of March. And I thought perhaps I need to send that in as well add that to the universal credit thingamajig online, so that they've got that information.

Because I've got this letter. This is to contact this is good to confirm the above property is exempt from the payment of council tax for period of 1st of April 2026 to the 31st of March 2027. As it falls into exemption class you this class relates to properties that meet the following criteria, a dwelling occupied only by person or persons who are severely mentally impaired.

It didn't hit well, I'll be honest, I didn't land didn't land quite as softly as I had a thought. It's like what? And so I thought I put that in there. So my council tax was about 15 pound a week.

15 pound a month or something. I don't know 26 a month. I don't know.

But now they've kind of the only reason I applied for exemption is because universal credit told me to. And because I don't have much coming in from universal credit. So I don't know why I'm telling you all this information.

It's a bit too. It's just that severely mentally impaired thing that really, it shook me up a little bit there. It's when I found out it's a similar thing when I was having therapy.

And this was, I'm an oversharer, by the way, if you've not not been here before. I am pretty much the world's biggest oversharer. And I shouldn't but hey, what do you do? What can you do? I overshare.

Let's have a look. Where am I? Nega, Nega, what's happened to Nega? Nega Munchetti. Oh, she made she made a comment.

Every now and then there's a channel is it ITV or BBC? I don't know. Nega Munchetti. She's a presenter, early morning presenter on BBC.

That's a BBC. And she's funny. And she's got a bit of she definitely got a bit of wit about you know, she she says things that are quite real, actually.

So she's something she doesn't like she says it. And if gets a little bean up on it, she does like we all do sometimes. But she does it live on air.

And occasionally has a bit of a fallout of a co presenter and she sometimes says the wrong things, which I'm pretty sure everyone does as well in real life. So yeah, I've seen a few, I've seen a few times, getting into a little bit of a row with her on screen husband. Anyway, so I was gonna look so the fair right.

So I went to this therapy called DBT. So DBT. Let's have a look.

And with a psychologist, this was after I moved in here. So it's probably about 2016. Possibly, I was going through that.

And it's basically dialectical behavioral therapy. And so DBT for short, is especially designed for EUPD, which is emotionally unstable personality disorder, and combines individual and group therapy. I wasn't suitable for group for group therapy.

And so to teach skills for coping with intense emotions, and other stuff that I'm not going to read out here, and improving relationships, it emphasizes validation of feelings while challenging harmful behaviors, helping patients break negative emotional cycles, blah, blah, blah, blah. Well, I thought I was having therapy for the bipolar. And I wasn't.

And so I'm sitting at my desk, I got my table over the other side of the room near the window. And it was a table that I in like that my dad gave me when I moved in here. The lady, the psychologist was sitting the other side.

So initially, I would go in to see her. And then she started coming to see me in my home. And I guess to see how I was living and stuff like that.

And then we did it for about a year and a half. And then eventually, it ended up being every two weeks. And then it was every three weeks.

And then it was once a month, you know, just gradually kind of ended it by I think about 2019 2018 19, something like that. And because when I started it, probably to Yeah, I don't know, I, I was, I didn't know. Well, basically, we were sitting there.

And I was talking about something a bit confused about why I was feeling this way. And she said to me, I must be your EU must be your personality disorder. Must be because of the personality disorder.

And I said, huh? What are you talking about with us? I said, well, what what? Genuinely, nobody had told me that I had a personality disorder. And I'd seen multiple psychiatrists. It sounds weird, doesn't it? Say, I saw five or six psychiatrists and not one of them told me I was ill.

Not one of them. Yeah, pretty clear. But no, no, no, they said bipolar, no one ever said anything about an additional personality disorder, not one person.

And I did see about six different psychiatrists. Anyway, I, I said, What? I was really shocked. It hit hard.

I'm not gonna go into details. It hit hard because a relative of mine was also diagnosed with that, that condition. And many, many, many, many, many years ago.

So it had a bit of an effect on me like, Oh, no. Yeah, anyway. I questioned, I said, No, it's bipolar.

Like, you should know what I've got. You're the psychologist. I've been diagnosed by, you know, a couple of times now, but this is like, they really went into it.

So I was diagnosed in 2010, December, with bipolar. And then 2013. I was seen multiple times by multiple psychiatrists over a period of time.

And it was kind of, it's almost like they really wanted to sort of check out what's going on with me. And, you know, I thought she should know that I got bipolar because that's what she's here for. That's why she's sort of coming around.

And she said, No, you got bipolar. It's just you've been diagnosed with that as well. But this is this is a separate thing.

They go sometimes they do go hand in hand. But it's you know, personality disorder used to be called BPD, BPD, DPD. But borderline, yeah, borderline personality disorder in this country is called emotionally unstable personality disorder.

Personality, there's lots of different, lots of different personality disorders. And she said, mine was with I forget the name, I've got it written down somewhere. Not a rational, potentially be doing stuff.

Also, right, we're doing. Let's see if I can. I don't know why this is funny.

Different types, different types of EUPD. Right? Because different. I know what it is when I see it.

I just I don't normally give this too much. Okay, impulsive. Yeah.

So impulsive. That's the that's the borderline. So I'm not borderline.

I'm a good boy. And she said, almost like you don't believe me. I said, well, it's not that I don't believe you.

I just, why is no one mentioned it to me? She said, I don't know. I just figured they had. I said, Is there anything else I've got that you've not mentioned it? She said, you've got two heads.

What? No, but I said, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, micro penis? And I said, she's what she showed me the screen. She's turned it around. So look, and it was black and white.

She sent me the letter. So I could see it. I've got it written somewhere.

Just as as a written diagnosis from the psychiatrist. Psychiatrist. It's like, wow, it's ridiculous.

They wouldn't tell me. So I was having therapy for a condition I didn't know I had. So the dialectical behavioral behavior therapy DBT, which is what I was I had for a while.

The problem is, I spent a lot of that time focusing on my Nan, who was I was going through like the passing of her. And then I don't mean bowel movement. I mean, you know, she left.

And then the upheaval of moving in here and all of you know, the challenges that came with it, moving home and it's there was quite a lot involved. And I didn't know what I was supposed to be focusing on because I didn't I didn't know that I had that. And I remember I phoned up my step mom and I said, I could just be told this.

Slight what's his name's got that I've got the same as them. And she said, well, it doesn't mean you're going to be like them. Just like, not, you know, oh, so yeah, that was kind of weird.

But why am I talking about this? I don't know. That's the question. Why am I so open? Why am I such an oversharer? There's no need for is there really? Maybe it's just because I've got older.

I used to like to overshare. No, I've always been like this. Really.

I had to learn to shut up when I was younger. Otherwise, I don't think I'd have survived. You know, there was a point where, well, people used to tell me to shut up.

And so many people I've noticed in life didn't want to have a, an honest conversation. And I remember when I was about late 90s. I remember I was hanging out with the staff of the comedy club after hours.

And one of them said to me, then like the next day, he said, you need to get some therapy. I said, what do you mean? He said, whenever you have a drink, you open up. You start telling people about all this stuff.

I said, well, he said, yeah, we're trying to have a good time. You're bumming everyone out, man. That's when I kind of, okay, that's not good.

So I stopped drinking. I did coke instead. So I just, I didn't want to do that.

It's like, it's oversharing. I've learned to do it without alcohol, which is good. Maybe not.

I suppose it's different ways. I think maybe when I was drunk, or when I was drinking, I was a bit more forceful with it. But I maybe didn't have much of a sense of humor about stuff.

Yeah. Strange. I'm glad I don't drink anymore.

Yeah, I am. Although sometimes I think, hmm. But generally, I'm pretty glad I don't.

I don't need it. That reminds me, I've got an order coming through. It's not a drink.

It's four minutes away. It's Uber Eats grocery shopping. Because you know, I realized earlier today, tomorrow is Good Friday, which means if I can get a delivery from Uber Eats, if they if they're delivering, they're going to be charging extra money to deliver.

Because it's a bank holiday. They're going to be the shops are probably put everything up. Or maybe not everything up but it's going to be a lot of stuff that's not available as well.

So I just got a few little bits. Because what is it? A half past seven. So a few little bits is coming through.

So that should see me through till next week. I've got boxing on this weekend. So Chizora against Wilder.

And I know how Wilder can win that fight. But no one will listen to me. I've been phoning him.

He's ghosted me baby. See, here's here's how I can see how Wilder can win it right. Chizora will throw the overhand many, many, many, many, many, many times through the fight.

That is his signature thing. He's he comes forward and he throws the overhand. He throws lots of different things.

But the overhand is his thing. So my advice to Wilder is this if you're listening Mr. Wilder, Mr. I'm too good to listen to you. To listen to you, you know, armchair critic.

I'm not I know I'm an armchair. I'm an armchair lover. I don't love armchairs.

But I mean, I love boxing for my armchair. All he has to do is avoid getting hit, obviously. But I would say every time Chizora throws that right, get out of the way, move his head and tap Chizora on the chin with his left or his right hand.

But to all on his chest or his chin, just so he doesn't even feel it, just tap it. Just see if it's there for the taking. And just punch really lightly.

Do lots of jabs, but punch very lightly. And then after the third or fourth time that Chizora chucks that right overhand, put a really hard punch in to his chin and uppercut. Or just a straight, you know, just like a counter punch with a left or a right.

It doesn't matter because either way, Wilder can knock out an elephant with that punch. And that'll be the end of the fight. Chizora won't get up.

Now I'm a big fan of Chizora and I want him to win. But that is the way that Lennox, Lennox Lewis, that's the way that Wilder can win that fight. He won't win it on points, I don't think.

Chizora's got a better engine and he won't stop. The other thing Wilder needs to do is he needs to punch. He's become punch shy over the years.

Ever since he fought Tyson Fury, he sort of seems to be waiting for that one punch, which is, you know, a brilliant punch. But he needs to go in there and do what most other boxers do is let the knockout punch come naturally. It's brilliant being an expert on stuff.

Right, my delivery's coming. So I'm going to pick that up and I'm going to continue with this. But it's not here yet.

Two minutes away apparently. It was here and now it's two minutes away. They're going to make up their mind, innit? Oversharing.

Is it a bad thing or is it a good thing? I mean, I think it was probably a bad thing when I was at school because, or not a bad thing, but if it opens you up for, if it opens me up to be mocked, then it's not necessarily a good thing for me, especially considering my reaction, how my reaction might be to that, which is why I couldn't really have this conversation live on somewhere like TikTok.

Because the responses would be awful, potentially. And I don't have thick skin like that.

And I think I used to have thicker skin when I lived in London, because you have to learn to have a mask on. Just generally, just traveling on the tube, public transport, walking down the street, you have to be, I don't know, a bit ready, you know, you have to be a little bit alert. Right, the delivery was delivered by the delivery driver.

And what was I talking about? Dragons. Was I talking about dragons? No. Monkey Kung Fu? So I wanted to be a Monkey Kung Fu artist when I was about 15, 14, 15.

So when I was doing karate, like I always have done, really, if I get involved or interested in a particular subject, I go all out. You know, buy every book I can, or, you know, back then go to library if I could. Watch every video.

But now it would be like watch every video on YouTube. It just really get involved, you know, just, and that's what I did back in 1983, 84, 85. I was, what was the magazine I used to get every month? I think it was combat.

And in the magazine, there'd be adverts for books. So I had a few books on Kung Fu, different styles of Kung Fu with the forms and how to do the different things and I used to practice them in my room. And some stuff like exercises, calis, calis, calisthetics, what it was called, where I think it's the right term where you basically use your muscles against each other.

So there was this exercise, I'm gonna do it now, which is gonna be weird, where you basically, you hold your hands out in front of each other, a bit like if you're praying, and you push against your hands. And then I'll do it so I don't hit the microphone. And then just push your hands outward slowly, like so point towards you and just push out.

So you can feel your shoulders, your arms, your chest muscles. And then just move it back slowly as well, pushing out the whole time. And pushing towards each other the whole time to your chest.

And maybe do that like a few times. And then relax. And you pull your hands apart.

So you pull your fingers away from each other. And do the exact same thing. Going forward.

And then going back to your chest. And I used to do this every day. There's different ones where you go up, go behind your head, you know, different, go to the side and stuff like that.

So I had a book like that. I don't know why I went into great detail about the exercises, but I just remembered them. I did those for years, all through my 20s.

And because you can like immediate, immediately feel your muscles tensing. And some of the smaller muscles, like all my muscles are small nowadays. Especially the one that I'd like to be large.

My biceps. And do you know that not everybody, some people that look like they've got big biceps, it's only because they've got no fat. See, like muscles, you know, people like they've got eight packs or whatever, six packs.

I mean, the old joke that I've got a barrel but it's like a six-pack everybody's got a six-pack it's just mine's hidden by fat everybody has very very good stomach muscles some better than others but as far as some look better mine don't look so great but they work otherwise I wouldn't be able to stand up so it's worth remembering like if someone says oh you got no muscle well if you didn't have any muscle you wouldn't be able to move so there and the heavier the person is the stronger

their legs are if they're mobile so someone walking around with 10 stone or 12 stone unless they're you know like walking around 12 weight of 12 stone or 160 pounds or something I don't know 150 pounds unless they're actually training in like lifting heavyweights in a gym the person who's walking around at 220 pounds is probably gonna have stronger legs basically because they're using them to carry weights around heavyweights all the time I saw this documentary on YouTube and this lady had I think she was 900 pounds or 890 pounds

which is it's like four times what I am it's just it's huge it's just very dangerous you know for her and she could walk from her bedroom to the front door it was hard but she could do it to pick up her food I mean you know obviously there was I was going to show you that that was a carrot on the stick that's probably the wrong vegetable generally use vegetables should I put it was the ice cream on that you know but the fact is she could do it so

it just shows you how strong not only were her legs but her ankles because guaranteed if you put 900 pounds of weight on my shoulder my ankles would not be able to take that my legs would not be able to take that and expect me to try and walk my ankles my ankles would never talk to me again I mean the fact is I won't be able to carry that anyway it's just a huge amount of weight that's what 2 4 6 I mean four times my weight on my shoulders

okay if you just take three times because you've got the own weight as well haven't you so if I just do three times my weight on my shoulders to make up the four times on my ankles so I'd have to have 600 pounds of weight on my shoulders nope ain't gonna happen no I mean there are people that can do that I'm not one of them I'm not is 600 pounds a lot pounds lift a lot okay a 600 pound deadlift is considered a significant milestone so that's a deadlift that's

not lifting above your that's just lifting off the floor does a deadlift include lifting above your head so training experience and body weight play crucial part roles so a 600 pound deadlift is a remarkable achievement it's not common for the general population so the kind of people that could lift 600 pound is usually someone at 600 pound so Tip will aim for a deadlift of at least their body weight make a 600 pound lift impressive for someone at 600 pounds which is still like six two four six what's that like

16 it's like 35 nearly 40 stone elite fighters a lifters rather may achieve this weight due to years of dedicated training and strong foundation so that that makes sense but 600 pound so it says a 600 pound deadlift is potentially Charles play for elite powerlifters I'm not elite powerlifter it is achievable as a recreation it's this is a deadlift this is just lift it up from the floor standing up straight and then follow it let it down that's a big difference between someone putting on your shoulders holding it or okay

lifting up and then walking with it that's a different ballgame so that'd be like getting two dumbbells of 300 pounds each doing a deadlift lifting them up and then just walking from one side of the flat or to the room or ever to do the next side and then still holding the weights saying hello to the delivery driver picking up all the food on a tray which is gonna be a lot there's a lot of food there gets delivered three times a day lots of food and you have to add

that on to the weight and still hold that 600 pound weight as you walk back to the bed holding all the food as well I mean technically it's a little bit different because she had a hands-free because she wasn't really actually lifting dumbbells because she didn't have dumbbells and you might be thinking yeah but she did you just told me she did no the dumbbells it was an analogy of trying to give an idea of what it would be like for somebody to walk around with that weight but then you

could say yeah but the 300 pounds 600 pounds you'd have to take off the weight of the person so for me for example he'd have to I don't know I'm 220 230 I don't know what it is you have to take off that off the weights to make it like normal as like a weight weight rather than just you know you can't ignore the weight of the person so okay so make the weights 300 pound each no 200 pound each yeah 200 pound each to make it to the 600 let's

say roughly if I was 200 but then you'd argue oh well you've got the bar the dumbbells are still in your hands but the analogy is the weight rather than the actual lifting of the dumbbells because yeah it would be hard to carry food if you're holding the dumbbells it's it's not an easy process there'd be a lot of balancing and it wouldn't work where would you put the tray so I mean you say well just imagine that the dumbbells were invisible but there's not really any dumbbells there you see

it's like an analogy of how an example an imaginary example of how that could be viewed from a different angle and for example like I mean analogies is it it's a comparison between one thing and another typically for the purpose of explanation or clarification you see what I mean so it's not it's not exact I'm not actually saying that the person's got there is really actually carrying dumbbells around with them all the time although I have thought about doing that not outside because I'll probably get weird looks but carrying dumbbells

around just whenever I stand up I have to carry dumbbells I don't know because there was an old person years and years ago a long time I don't know if it's even a real person but they they basically got a I think it was a pig or hog maybe it was a cow but was a little baby cow or baby baby hog and they carried it around everywhere they went so as the pig grew or the elephant or whatever it was as it grew the the young boy or the young

man teenage man he didn't notice that it was growing because he was also growing but he was getting stronger every day because he was carrying this growing animal around but he didn't notice it because he was carrying him everywhere until eventually he had this full-grown elephant a full-grown elephant on his shoulder and he ended up being the strongest man ever I think it might have been Samson was it Goliath who's Goliath Samson Hercules Samson isn't Samson though half of a like the similar with Hercules like a you know a half

a God thing it was wasn't he wasn't he one of Zeus's offspring how many were there this is gonna bug me now how how many half-human half-human bastards human kids did Zeus have Zeus is believed to have fathered over 50 children including many half-human offspring while the exact number varies among sources estimates suggest there were about 51 children in total with notable half-human figures such as Hercules and Perseus Perseus Perseus Perseus so why didn't Perseus ever get because Perseus from the oh what's he called anyone Perseus that movie where he's

Oh cannon cannon cannonball not cannonball war of the cannons war of the rages rage of the wars the cannonball run no the cannon Karen Karen's running the calls of Ptingbong oh what was it called Clash of the Titans that's it Clash of the Titans or a movie and that was Perseus so Perseus was half son was a son of Zeus but he never really got a lot of attention did he the same way that what's his name did Hercules but what about Samson anyone I mean is Samson was Samson a

Zeus's son as well no so Samson why is it going Simpsons I'll put Samson s-a-m-p-s-o-n Samson that's weird it's really not moving away from Simpsons Sam maybe maybe it was Samson without an F without a P yeah Samson biblical figure is said to have had children but why him who's Samson's dead Samson's dead Samson was born Mona Manoa and his wife who was initially barren I was born to Manoa and his wife who was initially barren so she's in charge of a castle and the angel of the Lord and appeared

to her announcing that she would conceive a son who would begin to deliver it okay that's a similar story to something else isn't it a man and his wife who couldn't have kids okay fair enough so so technically he was half half God was the Samson was half God Samson the Wonder Horse Samson half God Samson this is a list of notable offspring of a deity were more okay so all right I've put a gondalf gondalf Samson half God right so let's go get rid of Zeus he's not doing anything

in this so let's have a look Samson is often regarded as a demigod which is is that not half like a step step God kind of step God father step God child as he possessed superhuman strength granted by which allowed him to perform extraordinary feats such as slaying a lion and defeating the Philistine army with a donkey but his strength lied in his hair though didn't it in his hair but did it though and there's no logic to that is there I mean I'm pretty sure when I've had a haircut

and I shaved my hair off I don't necessarily feel weaker feel colder oh especially when it's winter hmm Samson I'm thinking about doing another bedtime story time so I've done one for a long time and I'm thinking maybe just well I'm kind of interested myself in some of the stories I like fairy tales I used to anyway I quite like that world that magical fantastical world where I just I just do but it is also a very devious world isn't it it's like it's almost a mirror to like life I

guess but and I know that the fairy tales that were made in order to teach when they to teach people how to behave and stuff I think I don't know but I am interested in maybe ooh maybe maybe doing some maybe doing a couple perhaps perhaps next week I'll do one just like because it's been so long and I can't remember the last time I did a Jason Newlands or Jason's boring what did I call it Jason's bedtime story time I don't have I even got it on here I'm sure

must have somewhere Jason's bedtime story time no it doesn't seem to be on my playlist why is it not on the playlist that's very strange bedtime story time it must be on here it's actually not on it's not on my podcast list that's very strange I thought it was shows you how up-to-date I am with my own podcasts Jason's bedtime story time sleepy boring objects oh there is I found it it was there all the time I've done 30 done 30 all together no 31 31 31 31 yeah Alice needs

a poo that was the last one I did and that was on the 4th of January 2025 it's just definitely you know it's time to do another one the first one I did was I don't know if I got the date it doesn't look like I do have that's a shame what a shame oh no don't know when the first what date the first one was Wow so the first one I did was three bears and then three piglets and Humpty Trumper Humpty Trumper rap noodle Tiggy Wankle mrs.

Tiggy Wankle little rude ridin little rude riding hood oh this was an original story Andre the ferret discovers unconditional love Wow I wonder what that was about farting beauty so childish my lord bag of poo that's one the flatulent exotic mermaid Welsh and hunted rabbit the elephants of the tail okay a little weird the golden snail Jack and the tall weed Jack and his dirt box Molly wipe mount penny and the farty eye the miser's store worm and what we got smelly old toothless Sultan life is a weird titles in

a snow white and some little people the wolf and the seven smelly children Wow the smelly nice mouse okay the little stinky mermaid who came up with these titles 24 the naked elves and the lazy shoemaker the 12 dirty dancing princesses Wow what weird titles don't know where I got these from number number 26 Thumbelina needs a bath and then you got 365 fairies necklaces little Tim and the magical forest and you got 29 is a Cinderella ish story and 30 is Frogtopia and I think I just lost my creativity

with titles then and then you got Alice needs a poo so it might be time to have a little have a little go at making a new one you never know it might be fun I just don't know where would I get because really I need out of our print out of print and copyright copyright fairy tales out of print copyright fairy tales we're looking for a fairy tale that are out of print and available free there are several resources to consider fairy tales for teachers offers free downloads of fairy

tales with illustrations and golden age illustrations from golden okay public domain children's books lists 20 public domain children books including fairy tales that are free to use and there's one called blue bonkers provides free printable cutouts and coloring pages or fairy tales for bedtime reading these resources allow you to access a variety of fairy tales that are no longer under copyright providing a legal and cost-effective way to enjoy these classic stories always ensure to check the copyright status of the specific story you wish to use to avoid any legal issues

okay what I could do if I go to chat GPT let's see if it could make me chat GPT so please write me a short fairy tale story fairy tale story mixing up famous stories and resulting in a nonsensical story that's really ridiculous I need to speed up my typing so please write me a short fairy tale story mixing up various stories of famous stories and results in a nonsensical story that is really ridiculous okay so here is where we go once upon a time in a kingdom that kept changing

its name depending on who was asking there lived a princess named cinderella riding hood she wore a glass slipper on one foot and a hiking boot on the other because she never knew when she might need to run from a wolf or attend a ball I like this story one morning her fairy godmother who was exactly three dwarfs in a oh dear that's good one morning her fairy godmother who was actually three dwarfs in a sparkly trench coat appeared in a puff of glitter and mild confusion tonight they said in

unison slightly out of sync in unison but out of sync that doesn't make sense does it you shall go to the royal ball or possibly a picnic um we didn't read the invitation properly cinderella riding hood nodded politely as a talking teapot nearby whispered don't trust them they won't turn the pumpkin into a submarine meanwhile deep in the forest a wolf sat at a table having tea with a giant beanstalk I'm expecting a visitor said the wolf adjusting his reading glasses possibly a girl or a boy who climbed you or

a porridge thief hard to say up above a boy named jack and slid down the beanstalk carrying a golden goose a harp that wouldn't stop singing show tunes and a very confused frog who insisted he used to be a prince but now preferred being a frog because it was less paperwork back at the castle the ball had started or a picnic or both and there were sandwiches wearing crowns and noble nobles dancing with breadsticks cinderella riding hood arrived in a carriage that had definitely been a pumpkin five minutes ago but

was now arguing with itself about whether it was still technically a vegetable she danced with a mysterious prince who turned out to be the wolf in a tuxedo you see familiar she said do I see the wolf I get that a lot must be my face at midnight because it's always midnight even when it's clearly 3 to 17 minutes past 3 in the afternoon everything began to unravel the dwarf's trench coat fell apart revealing them arguing over whose turn it was to be the head and the pumpkin carriage turned back

the pumpkin carriage turned back into a pumpkin and rolled away indignantly jack tripped over the beanstalk the harp switched to jazz and the frog applied for a job as a footman okay cinderella riding hood lost her glass slipper her hiking boot and briefly her sense of direction the prince wolf tried to chase her but got distracted by a basket of snacks in the end everyone gathered in the middle of the chaos slightly out of breath whoa said the teapot that was completely ridiculous agreed said the wolf who sounded quite similar

to the teapot should we do it again tomorrow asked jack as the narrator tried to figure whether or not he'd actually spoken before whether or not the voice was correct and everybody nodded and they all lived not happily ever after exactly but certainly very confused ever after the end so that was chat gpt came up with that little story that's good wasn't it i like that it was quite nice to have a story to read and then i can change it around to suit myself and then i can add dialogue

my own dialogue and my own voices and just you know it's good to have like a little kind of like a template to play with and that's how i view the the fairy tales that i've read previously so i'll read it out and then i'll kind of add stuff change it around a little bit it go off track i guess i suppose and yeah it's quite fun i don't know why i didn't do them more regularly because they're one of the things that i probably enjoyed doing the most because it's

just a laugh you know i mean i don't know how sleepy they are though to be honest because some of them i do go a little bit silly so that one was relaxing that was quite low-key but if i did sometimes i'll like the three pigs and there's dialogue that goes on and sometimes the dialogue's just ridiculous and i start laughing because my own dialogue but i'm laughing at what i'm saying which is probably probably a bit conceited but i'm not sure because i don't know what it means why am

i trying to use a word that i don't know what it means but then if i only use words that i knew what they mean that they meant i wouldn't say much would i be a very very short podcast 30 seconds each 30 seconds oh the chip van has just turned up and vinnie now barks he barks at the chip van when it turns up because he's got like this growl growly that's not him that's the chip van it's basically it's like an ice cream van converted from what i can

see but instead of you know the old ice cream tune it's just like grounded metal grinding against each other it's it's i'll tell you what it's like it reminds me it's the same sound as the rag and bone man used to make so they'd come down there i think they used to have horses to start with but then they have they'd come down with a van or like a a truck open back truck so you could chuck stuff in and just like grinding and it's that same sound on the chip

van yeah but vinnie used to associate it with uncle sausages because he knew when he heard that that uncle sausages was going to come out and play he saw him every thursday night he saw him other times but that was the one time he really knew vinnie did that it was like and possibly sausage time as well because he could get a sausage he hasn't had a sausage in ages ages and ages i'm trying to think of something that's happened today so i've had two deliveries i had some fruit i

had to get two separate things one i just had which was just basic some breakfast cereal and some water um yeah that's about it really just very basic kind of stuff and then earlier i got a delivery from iceland which was mainly frozen stuff which and they had these special offers on five five four i don't know but they had these like special like really good offers so i just went and i basically filled up my freezer jam-packed to the top and it's like this is quite nice because sometimes i've

only i've either got like breakfast cereal to eat other times i've got food that i have to cook to eat like proper cook you know sometimes i've got stuff that i can just stick in a microwave but i kind of had so many years of lasagnas that i've kind of gone off them a bit to be honest so what i've done now is i've got a mixture of things so instead of just i've got food that i can eat that i can cook but also i've got stuff that i can

just stick into the air fryer like pizzas like little pizzas and just bits and bobs i can stick in there and it'll be ready in 20 minutes 15 minutes 20 minutes and it's quite handy to have you know just makes things a little bit easier it means that i'm gonna eat cooked food a few pies and just things that are just easy to have sometimes easy to just you know i put a pie in that air fryer for 25 minutes that generally is enough time to cook it and it's done

got to wait for it to cool down though that's the thing isn't it weird how something so hot can then be like cool do you know like it could be like too hot to get anywhere near your mouth and then you just eat it and it's just so easy it doesn't there's no burning or anything it's just a really nice temperature really vinnie what was that all about what are you trampling on oh there's paper underneath the desk that's nice what a lovely treat thanks for that vinnie that was lovely

lovely oh oh they launched a spaceship into space today going towards the moon or going to planning to land on the moon for the first time in about 600 years and i don't know why they're going back to the moon i mean i don't know why they didn't stop going to the moon and why we haven't built some kind of um base a place for us to live on the moon if needed you know and it's not like it could be funded because people billionaires would pay for it wouldn't they

let's face it if it cost a billion pound to stay for a week on the moon they'd the queue would be massive they'd never fill the spaceship so they'd never they'd what i mean is there'd always be a queue they could never fulfill as many people who'd want to go up there which means the whole process would be paid for but what would happen then though because if you had someone build a you know they used a plot of land and they built on it i don't know let's say a

leisure center a spa i don't know a hotel or something and would they then think that they owned the moon that's the question isn't it would they believe that they owned the moon which country believes it's a it's a fair question because you know there might be a few countries that have been on the moon over the years and maybe they all believe they own it maybe america thinks they own it because they were there first or perhaps russia because they've been there i mean as far as i know everyone's

been to the moon except me how many countries how many countries countries have landed i bet it fills it in for me landed on how many countries have landed see it filled it in for me if you move i just put in how many countries have landed on filled it in the moon here's a clear answer four only four has six successfully soft landings on the moon united states russia china and india a bit more content context the united states was first 1969 soviet union achieved earlier robotic landings in 1960

but it was the first human on the moon wasn't it that america got but it weren't what so russia were the first to land on the moon technically as far as like landing a spaceship the soviet union okay china has landed multiple missions in recent years including far side landings and india joined the list in 2023 with its successful chandra dry our own three mission vinnie why are you moaning are you hungry for your num nums for your num nums so you want you want you want to eat your food

is that what you want we're just moaning because you're not getting any attention what about others okay a few countries and organizations have tried like japan israel and private companies but either crashed or had partial success oh that's interesting so only four so china they've been to the far side of the moon which is the dark side is it not so they might have cities because they might have thousands and hundreds of thousands if millions of people on the moon living up there they might own the moon can you imagine

imagine if all the countries of the world just got together and said you know what technically we're quite similar you know we've got similar bodies similar you know i mean just like do it it's probably more we fought more alike than than the not you know i mean humans so should we just have a little rest from you know some of this stuff having like a hundred year truce and let's start really getting together to see what we can do you know what other vaccines can we come up with look

2020 when we all got together look what we did so maybe we can do it again baby what other things can we cure what other um places can we what other things can we sort out and maybe go to outer space so who's got a colony on the moon this is america russia china india which one is it which was it it's we knew it was china yeah you've been doing the dark side of the moon so we don't know what you're up to well just let us visit we have

we want to be part of it can you imagine if everyone shared their technology freely wow the whole everything would be could be so good can you imagine just like saying well you get outposts so the moon would be one outpost and then it'd be space stations which would be like i guess traveling to mars would be like traveling you know if like you think about it going up um everest and yeah yeah kind of and i think if you travel up a mountain there's um isn't there like outposts or

you know where you sort of you get to one place where there'd be a hut maybe a bit of food and you get to just you know maybe stay the night have a warm have a little warm bath watch a bit of telly Netflix or whatever you know just have it just recoup recuperate yourself and then you set off for the next one and maybe there'll be a queue outside to get in but you know we could have that in space so i have the first one on the so you

could have like a refueling on the moon you know what i thought is it possible to have something if you've got a bit of rope like a bit of metal like a metal bridge rope thing you know those metal things that's like rope but it isn't really rope but it's pretty strong if you attached it to a a rocket and fired it into space so you made it so it wasn't it couldn't be burnt it was made of the same material or the same outer material as the space rocket so

it couldn't burn and it it'd come up through and then landed on the moon right could you set up a telephone on the moon or could you hold one end and the other like one person could hold one end and the other person could hold the other and you could just shake it i don't mean tug of war that'd be a weird one wouldn't it a tug of war between moon and earth but could you or if you had it hollow could you say hello and the other person could hear

you and the reason i'm asking this because if you could then that proves that neither the earth or the moon are spinning because otherwise it wouldn't be possible would it wow is that amazing people going about oh the earth's flat no it's round it's flat you know right it's not flat it's really no one's ever questioned the idea of the world be spinning because that doesn't make sense does it it doesn't really if you think about it yeah i just find that interesting so that note that pointless pointless note i'll

say bye-bye i'm gonna go and thank you for listening remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve to be happy be gentle with yourself you deserve to feel safe and also tomorrow is Q&A Friday so please leave a message on my or anywhere actually just leave a message on YouTube or my Facebook group jason newland's boring group so i can answer your question in the morrow lots of love bye