(10 hours) #24 A STORY OR TWO - Stress & Pain Relief (Jason Newland)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland and this is Relax and Stress Relief Podcast Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes Now, in this recording I'm going to do something a bit different So technically This isn't going to be like any of the other recordings Because I'm going to tell you a story It's a true story But what it might do is open your mind towards something that I discovered Which may be really useful for you going forward And it's in connection with chronic pain and Stress So this might

not be the only story I ever tell I might one day tell you about my own stress issues from the past And sort of how I kind of overcame them Although I have talked about that in the past on other podcasts But this isn't going to be about me This is going to be about one of my clients back in 2006 Or 2007 one of those Yeah, I think it was 2006 And I was offering a free pain relief service in my local town where I lived And at the time

I was working full-time And I did this on a Saturday morning I rented out a therapy room every Saturday morning And I had up to four people come and see me Between like nine and one, something like that Every person that came to see me I did a relaxation session with them And every single person told me That the level of their pain had reduced substantially Now I'm choosing my words there as they told me Because of course there's no 100% But it was to be able to really,

you know To know whether or not they were telling the truth Or they were just not wanting to, you know Upset me by saying that it was, that it hadn't worked But I don't, I don't think I present myself in a way So that somebody would want to please me in that way You know, I'm very much, I was very open to being told That something hadn't worked Because I could then do something else I could do something different And in those days, especially with Well, with all, any,

not recordings But any one-to-one sessions, especially with pain relief I was very focused and stress relief as well I was kind of like a dog with a bone In a sense of I wouldn't let it go Until I'd reached my client's goal Which was to, you know, reduce the pain And I'm just thinking, I'm going to tell two stories actually Two very Important, one for the chronic, for the pain relief One for stress relief Both were huge And you understand why I'm here when I tell you So I'm not gonna,

you know, there's no detail of The conditions that they had Because that's not relevant to the story It's relevant to their story But not relevant to this story So there's going to be two people The first person is a man And both of these people, by the way They sent me letters afterwards Like, you know, some months afterwards Telling me about the success So, you know, it definitely wasn't a case of Yeah, thanks for that And leaving and just thinking, what a waste of time You know, they really did benefit So,

and this is not in chronological order Because the second one was the person I saw first But I want to talk about the chronic pain client first And he came to me with something that is known as I've just forgotten the name of the term A false pain A phantom pain A phantom leg pain That's what he presented when he came to me I knew what he was coming to me for Because I've spoken to him on the phone previous For about three, four minutes I'll be honest,

I didn't know what it was I'll be honest, I didn't know what I was going to do When he came in You know, I thought, relax him And, you know, see how he is And see what kind of comes up creatively Now, I think the first thing It's not necessarily relevant But to call anything a phantom pain Is very disrespectful to the person that's experiencing it Because it's not phantom to them So, you know,

it's this person that had a motorbike accident And really badly damaged his leg And he had a damaged leg for Multiple operations and stuff Because they were trying to save the leg And he was in a lot of pain for probably about, I think, two years or something And then eventually they amputated it Seven years previous to him coming to see me Seven years And he'd been in pain, constant pain, for seven years To the point of, well,

you think of the worst case scenario That's kind of where he'd got to at times So he came to me And the reason I'm laughing is because Hypnosis is often the last option for people You know, they do everything else but hypnosis And it'll come as a last chance to try and get some kind of help Which is a little bit of a shame Because for pain relief and for stress relief Hypnosis is brilliant I guess it depends who does it or who you do it with And if you listen,

I should say, if you listen to my podcasts And you perhaps you don't feel you're getting the best benefit Do search for other people I know it's weird that I'm suggesting to go away But I want you to stay But never give up Because there's lots of people out there that are good Probably way better than me And some that are perhaps worse I don't know I try and work on the basis of It's not all done in just one recording Each recording builds upon the last one Even though it

may be completely separate Have nothing in common It may seem But there's that continuity I guess it's my voice is the continuity There's the relaxation Which is the continuity And, you know, different ideas And what you might find is over time Changes start to happen It may happen instantly It may happen, you know, during the recording You feel more relaxed But something bigger happens Something deeper Which can change how you think And you can end up feeling more positive about yourself And having more love for you Starting to feel a

bit more gratitude for what you have Instead of focusing on what you don't have And I'm being general with that As a human being I know that I do that sometimes And I think it's a general human habit Is to sometimes focus a bit too much on the negative Than on the positive And I'm a big believer in trying to find positives that are real Like I've got a grumbly stomach for some reason I've just eaten So I don't know why that is Shush Now,

if you could find positives about yourself that are real That you believe, that you know to be true Doesn't matter how big or small they are You can then build upon that And then as time goes by You start to realize when I say certain things That you do actually deserve to be happy It's not just a throwaway line Or a cliche Or whatever those various words that basically mean bullshit Because it's not, it's real Why shouldn't you be happy?

And some people say Oh because of what I did when the past is gone This is now None of us are the same person that we were 10 years ago 20 years ago 5 years ago Some people cling on With every ounce of their being to how they used to be And those are the most miserable people Some of those are the most miserable people you'll ever meet And I mean unhappy,

like really unhappy Because they're stuck in the past That past version of themselves Does not fit in with today's society You know still be walking around using words that are no longer appropriate And it's hard to keep up with all that stuff You know when I went to school When I left school The amount of things that were just normal to say And now can't say them anymore I try and keep up to date but not always that great But I think ultimately if you're not The less hate you've got

in you The less chance you're going to say something wrong or offensive But you know it's just an idea So the more you listen to me The more open you become to the fact that change is happening And every day you wake up you feel You know you might feel like Oh it's another day and everything's the same But it's not It's really not When you finish listening to this recording You'll be different to the way you were before you started And that's not because of how wonderful I am It's

because we are always changing One idea can change your perspective One idea You know one sentence can actually open up a part of your brain That almost transforms and gives colour A different maybe a different colour A different shade to the way that you used to see things It's almost like putting a colour over a spotlight So that maybe it used to be red and now it's orange Or it was dark blue and now it's you know bright yellow That changes the way you're seeing things Seeing things from a more

positive viewpoint So going back to this person that I was seeing He came to me He had one leg so he had crutches And yeah he did He didn't have his leg He didn't yeah he didn't have a what's it you know I don't know what they call them But he didn't have a prosthesis is it?

Easy so I don't you know don't know what the situation was but Because he was in so much pain he couldn't have anything touch it Basically that's the situation So I'm just talking to him He gives me the history Had the bike accident Tried to save his leg and you know for a couple of years Loads of operations and eventually had to have it amputated And for the last seven years he's been in tremendous pain with his leg I didn't know what to do So I kind of I thought I

need more information than this And with the best will in the world Having also been a counsellor Well I'm qualified as a counsellor Counselled for about three years full-time I people miss stuff out I don't think they purposely do it but Sometimes people miss important information Maybe it's because they can't face it themselves or it's just too you know difficult And I'll give you an example There was this lady that came to me for hypnosis She had a phobia of travelling to the airport That was the thing So she was

scared of flying But it was the travelling to the airport that was the thing That was the biggest thing Absolutely scared Really really And I was trying to think I couldn't really figure out where she was coming from on that So I said were you scared of flying?

No I wasn't scared of flying She was scared Okay she had a little bit of fear because of the travel But once she got to the airport The fear had gone And she was okay travelling on the plane if that makes sense But previous to that she kind of was absolutely petrified of the journey And the flight kind of included in that Until she got to the airport and then she was okay So I couldn't just leave it there I had to find out what was the cause Because there was

a cause on that one So that kind of stuff doesn't just suddenly appear for no reason And she said I don't know And I did some relaxation with her And you know just for the first time She came back twice The first time she did relax And we did some visualisation And did some rehearsal Because she had a trip coming up at the end of the month So it's about three weeks away So I saw her the first time And I said and she said Okay well I feel a bit

better about the journey than I did Probably the stress level would reduce by about 50% We rehearsed the journey in her mind We rehearsed it and you know so Because if your mind is imagining something happening Your body and your neurological system And all that stuff doesn't know the difference Between imagining it and actually happening With things like that So that's why that's the only reason phobias can exist Because of the imagination We couldn't have a phobia of something Based on something that happened in the past Because it'd just be

it happened and that was it It's only by thinking about it Almost reliving it That you know creates that phobia And if the mind didn't work that way If the mind didn't work in a way As of being able to just believe what's going on The whole body kind of joins in You know the party of negativity And the body and the mind doesn't know any different In a sense of what you think about Your body and your brain whatever All seems to believe it So that's something worth thinking about

You know what we feed into our minds Is often really believed Even though it might be absolute rubbish So the second week she came back Oh by the way just relax while I talk to you You probably are anyway Just just chill out You know there's a few ideas that will come up A few ideas a few And the learning I say learning but the The point of these stories I think will become evident You know very soon And it may change the way that you Approach listening to these recordings

in some ways Because it just shows there's more going on There's more to it And the power The power of imagination and relaxing is Infinite because we're always We're already using our imagination Unfortunately a lot of us use Use our imaginations to cause suffering for ourselves But not meaning to not intentionally Because we just haven't realized maybe That what you think about Is what your brain gives you more of So if you consciously keep thinking about something Your unconscious mind Whatever part of your mind that You know gives you stuff

It will just give you that Because it thinks that's what you want It keeps thinking about it Therefore it must be what it wants more of When actually it's the last thing you want You know if you if you meet someone You know if you work with someone Or someone maybe you see them once a week Whenever you see them you say oh about that Or about that football match Or you know about that basketball game Those I don't know anything about sports really Apart from boxing But what what about

those Lakers or whatever And that person will say oh yeah Yeah they're really good It was good that was yeah And you get into that like little Chatting about the Lakers When actually neither of you will really want to talk about the Lakers But for the next five years You know every week when you see each other You end up talking about the Lakers Because both of you think the other one wants to talk about it But you don't You just couldn't think of anything else to talk about You saw

that there was Maybe you saw they had a book on the side Which was a book about the Lakers club And you thought well there must be a fan of the Lakers I know a little bit I'll just say hello What about the Lakers Just so you could get on with them The fact that that book might actually be A gift for a friend And they might absolutely have no interest In that particular sport So you know they kind of you get more of what they think you want Oh he

wants to talk about the Lakers So I'll talk about the Lakers They start bringing you in You know Lakers merchandise And start saying do you want to go to a Lakers game And you're like no I don't Now I don't know who I know the Lakers are famous I don't know anything about them So I don't know if it's a foot Is it baseball or football I'm not sure Or is it basketball or skiing I don't know I'm English we don't have Don't really have basketball And we don't have American

football here either Well we do actually we do a little bit And so this lady came back to me The second week The one that was having phobias traveling to the airport And she mentions on a whim just off the cuff Oh yeah I had a crash I had a really bad car crash three years ago On the way to the airport And I said do you think that might have something to do Because I think we were talking about She was talking about car insurance That's how she got to

that And she asked me what I did And I said I work in car insurance Because that's what I did during the week And I was doing the hypnosis at the weekends I said I work in car insurance She said oh yeah I had a problem with the car insurance A few years ago I said yeah She said yeah they wouldn't pay out Because I had a you know I had this really bad car crash three years ago And they said yeah it was on the way to the airport So

she wasn't telling me about that She was just talking about the insurance I said wait wait a minute You had a car crash A bad car crash And you were injured on the way to the airport She said yeah I was on my way to go on holiday And I just looked at her I'm just like just I figured that we were on the same page And then she said well so what insurance company do you work for Like no no no no Let's back let's backpedal a little bit You

had a car accident on the way to the airport She said yeah And you got you got phobia of traveling to the airport She said oh As soon as she realized where the phobia started It changed Now she still needed She still wanted some relaxation and to prepare for the trip But a whole That rigidness had gone She started laughing actually At how ridiculous the scenario was That she hadn't remembered that And yeah she had a relaxation session Because she was here anyway So it was there for an hour or

50 minutes And then she she went off and sent me a letter A few weeks later saying she had a really good trip No no no problems going to the airport And thank you So going back to this man with He the phantom limb pain Again I had to delve a little bit more into it Because I couldn't Other than relax his mind The one thing I wasn't going to do Which didn't seem right I just didn't see the right thing to do Is to relax him and say to him

You know basically your pain isn't real It isn't real It's just phantom limb pain It doesn't exist And technically no physical pain exists In the sense of it's not in that part of the body It's coming from the brain You know there's a message from that part of the body Goes up your spinal cord to a part of your brain Which is responsible for you know that part of the body And then the brain sends a signal down your spinal cord Which is pain You know so the pain isn't actually

in that part of your body The injury is But the pain it comes from the brain Now it doesn't feel like that I know But that's the way it works I mean apparently when we Our vision we're actually seeing things upside down But our brain changes it So it's up the right way It's weird the way that humans are built Very strange So I wasn't going to say to him Yeah the pain doesn't exist It's just in your head All pain is in our head Technically you know as far as

you know As I said then how it comes from the brain Which I don't class as the head For me the head is the scalp The brain that's the It's inside the head So I didn't want to say to him No there is no pain there Because that would be condescending and Almost cruel To say something like that to somebody That had seven years of excruciating pain So I asked him to tell me a bit more about The accident about his leg You know during that period of having it Before

he had it amputated Because and I wanted to I wanted to know how it felt More than anything else I wanted to know how his leg felt Because oh it's in pain It's not enough for what I needed to do Give me a scale of 10 Between 1 and 10 He said 10 That wasn't enough It's great to gauge sometimes Especially if you're medicating someone I'm not medically trained So I can't do that But that's something that a doctor would do Or a nurse Where are you between 1 and 10 I studied chronic pain for years Like proper textbooks and stuff I wanted to become a pain specialist But unfortunately I have no intelligence So I wasn't able to Damn!

Who'd have thought So I asked him to describe to me the pain And the best person in the world To describe their physical discomfort Whether it's stress Whether it's pain Is that person So someone says Oh I've got You know my leg hurts It's so easy to assume that Oh it's the same as the person I saw last week That had a bad leg Or how it is for me when I've got a bad leg No we all experience things differently So I wanted to hear what it was like For

him Personally And he described it He basically said It's a little bit graphic But it's not You know it's horrible But it's really important for the story He said he felt his leg Felt the same as it did Just after the accident Because his leg was very badly Twisted let's say It was you know He had multiple breaks And so it's very But he said that's how his That's how his leg feels now The part of his leg that wasn't even there That's how he said it feels It feels the

way it did after the accident And I guess that would have been when he was in hospital Or maybe he Yeah he remembered the actual accident I think he was conscious after the actual accident So that's how it felt All twisted So I said okay Well I'm going to try something And I asked him to relax Just his body And I talked to him about his leg As if it was there So I think it was his right leg that wasn't there So I asked him I relaxed his body Started

at the top of the head You know how I do knees recording sometimes And when I got down to his hips Then I got down to his knees And what I did I focused on a relax his left leg first And then I started at the top of his right leg And got him to relax his The thigh of his right leg And then I asked him to start to relax The bottom half of his right leg Something that he's First of all never been asked to do Never even thought

about doing And was something he didn't believe was possible And in that process While he was relaxed I asked him to imagine That his leg Was starting to straighten up So it's become I said you don't want to feel anything You're going to feel so relaxed But what you're going to notice is your leg Is starting to Straighten up So it's no longer twisted It's going to go back into exactly the same position As the left leg Back how it used to be Before you know before the accident And this

will happen as you relax more and more So I want you to focus on that part of your body And just allow it to relax And I don't know how long it took Maybe 10, 15 minutes And I moved down to his ankles To his feet His toes Relaxing every part Of the bottom of his leg Onwards To the point where every It was just completely straight Completely how it used to be As relaxed as the left leg And then we finished the session You know well I didn't finish it

I asked him to open his eyes Because you know I'd always like to have at least 10 minutes At the end back then Where I could talk about what we'd done Find out how he was feeling And he couldn't believe it His leg no longer felt twisted His then a twist And he said that was what was causing the pain That was what was causing the discomfort The fact that his leg was so twisted Now that it's reset And back to its normal shape The same as the left leg Everything

facing the right way you know It wasn't hurting anymore And I think I was probably more surprised than he was So he left He said thank you I said come back next week Because I'll be honest I didn't know if it was going to last I didn't know Because this was the most serious injury That I'd ever dealt with As far as at that point And he came back the next Saturday He sat down He was there for probably 10 minutes He said I don't need I don't need anything from

you My leg's fine now He said for seven years I had people tell me That you don't have a leg there You don't have There is no leg there And that's the one thing I didn't need anybody to tell me I feel like crying actually When I say that It's like It's the most ridiculous thing to tell someone That they don't have a leg When they know that They don't need to be told that And he said I said okay I'm going to keep Next week One session open for you

And just I'll text Just text me Or I'll text you The Friday evening And let me know Whether or not you need it Or in the week You know Just let me know And he called me I think he said No it's fine Still good And then he sent me a letter A few months later To say that You know The whole story really So that was cool Which just shows that The imagination is so powerful So he Was actually Straightened in his leg In his imagination His body His nervous

system The brain Every part of him Believed that that was what was happening And those pain signals from his brain stopped It wasn't needed I mean from a simple A very simple perspective If you push your finger back There's a point where it starts to hurt a bit And that's the brain Basically saying Alert There's a There's you know That's This is what they call acute pain Acute pain I'm doing it And it's not that painful But it's a bit of pain Of course If I went further back It'd break

I guess eventually And then I would really need To finish the recording But that would be a bit embarrassed You know To do that Why would I do that But If I let go of it Instantly The pain stops So the brain reacts instantly To this stuff Now if the pain is still there When I let go That's the There's two things Either I've damaged my finger Or That would be the equivalent Of having chronic pain Pain where it's not needed And relaxation Visualization Imagination And That's really all you need

Maybe A bit of self-belief But that comes from it You start The more you do this The more you realize That actually There's different ways To feel relaxed You can feel relaxed Just by listening To me Talking about something Like this And Even When it comes to Physical Difficulties Or physical discomfort Can reduce Or even be eliminated By just listening So now what I'm going to do Is talk about the next person And this is very much To do with stress Relief Okay So we've done Chronic pain relief An extreme

version With Using Relaxation And I think these two stories Pretty much sum up The reason For this podcast Stress and pain relief So This next person Again Is extreme situation I had to go to her house Because she's too ill to travel She had needed Double lung transplant And Now that wasn't the issue Okay Her issue That was the issue for her But the issue that she asked me To go and see her for Was She had a lifelong Phobia Of hospitals A lifelong phobia To the point of Not even

being able to step inside A hospital Now she Needed to be on a transplant list She wanted to be on a transplant list And if she didn't get a transplant then Worst case scenario And she needed one Soon However Twice She'd been Had appointments To go into the hospital And to have all the tests That they have to do To find out if she was compatible In order to be able to have A transplant I guess if she was able to go through To cope with the operation All that stuff

I don't know the ins and outs But I think she had to go in for about two days To be Have all these different tests She was petrified I'll be honest I think I would be too But It wasn't about It was about going into the hospital Itself And she'd had two appointments Previous She stepped inside the hospital twice And ran out Crying And didn't go back Her specialist The doctor The specialist Said to her She had one last chance Because of the huge waiting lists and stuff And he said

That if you don't You know If you If you just don't turn up Because this is the day She couldn't really cancel You know You can't cancel an appointment like that You know 10 minutes before you're supposed to be there Because it's such a big process Two days worth of tests So he said You've got one last chance If you don't turn up for this appointment And stay for the two days And have all the tests You won't be on You won't be being put on the transplant list Which basically

was a death sentence If you However way you look at it It's you know If she wasn't If she didn't get a transplant She wasn't going to survive Not much pressure on me then And She wasn't easy To deal with either Because she was sceptical She didn't believe that I could help her She didn't believe She didn't know me I was in her house So that's It was her territory So it's almost I was almost like an unwelcome guest Which was weird And But Mike I had instant compassion for her

Because She was sitting there with an oxygen tank And She clearly was unwell And but She didn't Seem like she really wanted me there But I wasn't going to leave Until I'd done What I went there for I'm not saying that I wouldn't have left If she told me to get out Of course I would have done But I was I was determined To accomplish the goal That she wanted Which was I think this was a Saturday Afternoon And she had an appointment At Tuesday morning That's You know the distance

Wasn't long away So I was the last resort And so I Tried a few things Nothing worked But all the stuff I started at the beginning Didn't work She thought no that's rubbish That's not made any difference So I'm not going to go through All the different techniques But I found a way To relax her And it really was a case of Trying everything That I could think of And once I got that relaxation Things changed Her attitude changed towards me Her attitude changed towards Herself And what was going to

happen Now I ended up Feeling quite close to her actually The preceding months And we got on really well So the base The bottom line was And I had contact with her All the way through Including when she had the operation I would just say She did turn up to the Tests on the Tuesday morning Walked right in Had all the tests Apparently she was laughing loads When she was there It's almost like she felt free There's a freedom that she had And apart from the fact That this was going

to Hopefully save her life There was a freedom Because she didn't have that That anxiety anymore It was gone And she I spoke to her A couple of days later I think probably on a Thursday So she'd had the Tuesday And a Wednesday in there Spoke to Thursday evening And she was saying Yeah it was really good I was laughing And everything's gone through fine And I'm now on the list And I think about two weeks later She had the operation In Papworth Hospital In Cambridge And I actually visited her

To give her some pain relief To help her Because she'd had a major operation Had pain So I went there And helped her with that So the stress that she had I suppose one of the points I guess my point is I'm trying to kind of get to Is that was so so extreme Not extreme as in unwarranted But really really painful Anxiety that she had But also Potentially life-ending anxiety It was getting in the way of her survival And even that wasn't enough For her to If anything it probably

made it worse To be honest Because it just added to it And everything You know from up to the operation and stuff Everything worked out fine And she had the She had all the tests and everything And what she came to me for Was successful But I guess the the point really is No matter how What level of stress Any of us may have had in the past It can be reduced It really can It might take a bit of time But it can be reduced In a short time And

the more it's reduced The more often So if you listen every day You listen to a stress release session Or pain relief session Whatever it might be Something that stays with you Those feelings of relaxation Comfort Stay with you You absorb it You absorb that positivity And it changes things It really does Changes things It changes the way you think And the way you feel Possibly about more than just How you physically feel Or how you emotionally feel More relaxed But also You know things in life Start to notice More

of the positive things And that's quite transformative So as I said at the beginning of this recording It's a little bit different from normal But I thought it was useful A couple of useful stories That may Help From you know just in a sense of Changing the perspective Realizing that Ah Changes really can happen And they can happen pretty damn quick sometimes But they don't have to There's nothing wrong with things Going at a nice Easy pace Because that's more I guess what I'm into now Into A slow process And

part of that reason is because I don't know the ins and outs of the people listening At home So the thousands of people that may be listening to this I don't know You know I can't be hugely specific In some cases So this brings me to the end of this recording Thank you for listening and remember To be kind to yourself Because you do deserve To be happy So do something nice for yourself Take care Lots of love Bye