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(music) #1263 “It’s been noisy” Let me bore you to sleep (6th January 2025)

Recorded 6 January 2025 · 1 hr 44 min

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Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland.

My website is jasonnewland.com. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. My Facebook page, my Facebook group rather, is called Jason Newland's Boring Group. If you'd like to join and be one of the groovy bunch.

It's currently 205 members and it only took 6 years. So, you know, it's growing very gradually. It's growing very slowly.

Megan sent me a message today. I have responded but it said, Hi Jason, this is off of the Jason Newland's Boring Group on Facebook. Hi Jason, hope you're good.

This episode isn't on Spotify. The last one... Why did I think Apple? Blimey! Oh man, the last one on there is from the 13th of December. I made a weird noise, didn't I? Have you stopped posting on there or is it their problem with it? I always listen on Spotify, so hopefully it's just a blip.

That's the second someone else posted a comment saying it wasn't on Apple. Who sent me that? Someone sent me a message saying... I'm sure they did. They're not seeing stuff on Apple.

But Apple and YouTube is the best place to listen. But then this one says Spotify. Well, Megan, I've just gone on to Apple and tried to change things because some of the stuff is not coming up.

I've now on my website got a list. I'm going to have to get out of there. I've had a few little problems.

But what I've got on my website now, jasonnewland.com, if you go into the menu section, I've got Apple. I know that's probably not helpful to you, Megan. But I will try and do exactly the same thing for Spotify as well.

I'll probably do that tomorrow. Although I think Spotify may be connected to my SoundCloud podcasts. Because I've only updated up to the 30th of December on those.

So I'm in the process now, as we speak, of uploading the most recent recordings. So by the time I go beddy-byes, they should all be updated. So hopefully Spotify will also be updated.

It's a little bit of a muddle because, you know, sometimes Spotify doesn't update to a new podcast and they stick to the one they've got. And I don't know, I had this in the past. But what I'm going to do, I'm going to still update the Spotify, the SoundCloud ones.

Every time I make a new recording, as well as adding them on to my other podcast on Spreaker, which then is complicated. But they're all, it all should be available. As I'm hoping.

So who else said this? Someone? That's really strange. I definitely got a comment from someone. And I did reply.

Unless I just read it wrong. There's always a chance. Did I reply? Replied.

So, I'm sure the message said, it doesn't say it's been edited. I thought it said the episode isn't on Apple. And Apple and YouTube is the only place, the best places to listen.

Unless that was a different one. So I posted, Hi Megan, I made a page on website with all the updates, up to date links to Apple podcasts. Which is not what you asked for, Megan, at all, is it? I'm just confusing myself.

Not the first time, I'm sure you will believe. Someone, who sent me that then? Unless it was by a message. Nope, nope, nope.

Okay, I'm confused. I did, I wonder what happened. That's very strange.

No, can't find it. Nope, can't find it. So, I'm sorry.

What I'll do tomorrow is. You know, in the morning, when I wake up. I will move the chair so it makes a big bump.

Like I just did then. I will, I'll go on to, in fact I could do it now. No, I'm not going to do it now because I've got to be able to concentrate.

I could try and do it now. Okay, let's have a look so I can do it now. See if it's updated.

Now I don't know which podcast you watch on Spotify, Megan. Is it the, is it the Let Me Bore You To Sleep one? Or is it the, I can't remember my own websites. Hypnosis for sleeping deeply or is it the Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

I'm now in the process of uploading to the Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast. So what I'll do, if I click on there. Spotify, Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

Just on new land ASMR. No, that's not the one I want. Open Spotify.

Accept cookies. Right, so this is updated so far. So the ones I've done so far is updated.

So there's a few more, so 2nd of January, what's it the 6th today. Did a recording yesterday. Did I do a recording? I can't remember, I think I did.

So yeah, I've just got to do a bit more updating. If I did it at the same time as everything else it would be a lot easier. Okay, right, so you got New Year's Eve was the last one that was on there before 30th of December.

And we've got Happy New Year on the 1st. So yeah, that's cool. I didn't do a Tuesday one.

New Year's Eve, I was in bed by about 8.30 I think. Seriously, no lie. It sounds like I'm just making it up, just to show off.

But I really was in bed early. I don't even know why. Not really, there's no major reason.

Just wanted to go to bed. I find that's a good time to go to bed. There were times in the past when I went to bed when I didn't want to go to bed.

Anyway, I've done that. So what I'll do is I'll search, so that's getting updated. I'll now search for the Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply one.

Deeply, deep about the way you look. Contact sport. Okay, let's have a look.

Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply. Spotify, page not found. Let's see if there's another one.

Okay, the page is found. Mrs Winkle Twinkle. November 2023, that's the last one they've got on there.

That's not great, that's a bit strange. I think I've messed up a few little bits by then. Mrs Winkle, so relax, sleep deeply, page not found.

Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply. Yeah, this is not this is not working so well. Spotify is a little bit that's a shame.

Sleep in Deeply, so just if I can search for Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply and see if I can find it in the actual, in Spotify itself rather than through Google. Jason Newland, Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply. Mrs All Episodes, that's, why has it only got Show All? No, so there's only five episodes shown and it's from 2023.

That's strange, I don't know why that is. Very unusual. Ah, now I've found it.

I've found it. Yeah, so Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply is definitely connected to Spreaker because that's all updated. So I do have, it's weird.

There's just a lot that aren't there. I've got some old Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast on Spotify from like six years ago. Ones that don't update because I'm using a different platform and stuff.

So what I'll do. Okay, so it must be Let Me Bore You To Sleep that Megan's using, because it was Hypnosis for Sleep in Deeply. The only one that actually works properly is the one I'm on now.

And that is updated. Yeah, there are no others. Well, there's only one other and that's got Tinkle Winkle Wankle thing.

I don't know what that's about. Very strange. Very, very strange.

But it looks to me like Let Me Bore You To Sleep is definitely connected on Spotify to my SoundCloud and I don't know why it didn't. In fact, let me just check. Let me.

No, wait a minute. If I just go back. No, I've already done it, haven't I? Yes, it is definitely connected to SoundCloud because I've checked.

Unless Unless Let Me Bore You To Sleep. It might It just might be available. So let's have a look.

Let Me Boy. Blimey. There's a Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

Yeah, Let Me Bore You To Sleep is all updated as well. So what I'll do is the podcast is just basically under, because it's on Spreaker. Does it show, share, copy show link, embed show, open desktop app, follow.

Not now. I'm just trying to see if it says where it's from. More about the show.

Welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep, special design to unwind you, blah, blah, blah. Tune in to Let Me Bore You To Sleep and let Jason do his tranquil tales. What on earth am I talking about? That's weird.

Why can't I just? I went on a little bit there with the old description. I don't remember doing that with this. Yeah, it is.

So what I'll do because I'm trying to get rid of the SoundCloud. There's no point having both really. It's a bit pointless to have SoundCloud and Spreaker at the same time.

I've just kept it. It's more like a backup kind of, but what I'll do is I will share both those with Megan. So here we go.

Here we go. Posting, open. What's it going to say everyone? Let Me Bore You To Sleep and then I'll do the other one.

It's really weird. I've got that in my mind at the moment. There's actually a Let Me Bore You To Sleep here which goes up to number 25.

Can you believe it? And that was the 1st of June 2018. Let Me Bore You To Sleep That's the name of the podcast. And yeah, it's just basically the first the first 25.

Does it have all of them? All of them. It's not a lot is it? I do that in a day these days. No, it doesn't.

It goes down to number 5. There's no number 1. That's weird. I wonder why that is. Popular episodes, number 25 number 5, number 6, 23 and 24.

OK, so the weird thing about it is because Spotify, I think they actually download the recordings themselves onto their own server. So what I'm going to do now is I'm going to play it even though there's nothing connected. There's no podcast connected to this I've got no podcast connected to this Spotify podcast, OK? Not since 2018, 1st of June.

Shall we play it? It's not playing. That's weird. I thought it would play.

You're logged out. See? Wow. This is me.

I was 6.5 years ago. I can talk to myself. This is good.

Oh, can I? Really? You can see it as well? Excellent. What is the point? Tell us. I want to know.

I want to see what it sounds like. It's kind of a tester really. What are you testing? Oh, the quality.

To make noises? Can you hear though? What? What, what, what? Don't leave me in suspense. What? I don't know what's going on. Is it OK? I'm concerned now.

It's because I haven't pressed play. It works after 6 years, 6.5 years. Which is, I suppose, good.

It can confuse people, I think. As to why isn't... I knew what I was trying to say. I think.

ASMR. Right, that's exactly the opposite. So, deep sleep whisper.

Here we go, got it. This is not deep sleep whisper, this is hypnosis for sleeping deeply. So I'll add this as well.

Deeply... Why have I got that? Do you remember that? Fred said, I'm too sexy for my jockstrap, too sexy for my handbag, too sexy for my fingers, I don't know. I'm too sexy. Do you remember that from the 90s? And then I did the other song.

Deeply deep about the way you look. Deeply deep about the... Me and my friend would be working and every time they said the line, we'd look at each other and go contact sport! It filled us with hours of pleasure, it really did. Because, you know, the music would be pretty much on a loop.

It'd be the radio, live radio, capital FM I think it was, but it'd always play the same songs over and over again, all day long. So, you know, if a song was number one in the charts or in the top ten, guaranteed you'd listen to it, you'd hear it at least once an hour, if not more. Deeply, deeply, so that's it, I hope that this has been useful for Megan, I hope that's sorted that out.

So who posted that, though, about wanting to listen on YouTube and Apple? That's really thrown me off. If it is you, if it's someone else, if I just haven't got it wrong, which is looks like I have, if it was someone else posted, because definitely it's posted like I like to listen on YouTube, I'm pretty sure. Please let me know, because I seem to have forgot or lost your thing, the message.

So the latest, as I said, what I did today is I made that extra page for Apple, so my podcasts, Apple podcasts, the bbbbbb, they're alright. The only ones I didn't have is Q&A Friday and Relax Asleep Hypnosis Daily. For some reason they weren't available.

And I've still got the Facebook group link on there, episodes, podcasts, and you know, I haven't spent much time on the website lately, like the last couple of weeks, maybe this week anyway. But now I am. I'm going to do that tomorrow, so I'll come out of there, come out of the... Right, here's what I've been doing though.

So it's Monday the 6th of January 2.0 and 2.5 and I decided against my not my better judgement, but against my I kind of gave up a little bit on writing a book, because it's just so much work, like a huge amount of work, and the thing that I thought would make it easier seems to have made it harder which is all of the different recordings that I've done it's just a huge amount to go through, and this afternoon was that you Vinnie?

Was that you or me? Vinnie's been a bit reactive because downstairs I've been having the kitchen fitted, or refitted you know, taken out and put in. A lot of noise on Friday and we had the weekend off.

Today it's been pretty much non-stop all day, from half seven to five or something so I haven't been able to do anything as far as make recordings and he's been good most of the time but he's had his moments where he's just really barking a lot and tonight, ever since I've stopped making noise it's been a bit more his ears I think have been a bit more fragile a bit more reactive and it's weird I say that because my left ear is making some weird noises and he yeah,

so we had them downstairs, then we had people doing some building work outside, I don't know what they were doing, I don't know if they were cutting hedges, then we had someone else come along, cleaning the guttering out, which was really noisy, it was like noise after noise after noise, it was a noisy day it's not just that, it's the because there's not a lot of room in these flats the the people that are cutting up the, you know, putting in the workbenches, in the kitchen and all that stuff,

they're sawing in the hallway to get everything fit and measuring it and then doing it in the hallway outside, because there's not enough room inside the flats to do it, you'd literally have to empty a whole room to have the space, so you imagine how echoey that is, or that has been, and there's one point, I took Orts' name out for a W-A-L-K you know, one of them things L-W-A-L-K, and I'm coming back, I couldn't get in the front door, because they were doing the guttering in front,

and you know that ladder out there, I couldn't actually get into my own home I'm still waiting out there now, it's awful so I had to go in the back way I don't mind the back way, the thing is there's, I don't know who, I do but I don't, but I do really, I'm not sure, someone's leaving dog poo on the grass in the garden and the last probably since like, it's got darker I've been taking him out in the garden through his last wee wee of the night,

it's just a bit easier because then you know, because when we're out in the dark he's he's a bit reactive, and I can't really see what's about, even with the torch, and if he sees someone he doesn't like, or a dog, a big dog or whatever, he'll start barking and it's hard to see what he's doing so I just take him in the back garden, but now I've spotted I think four or five different piles of poo, dotted around on the grass, it's like it's grim,

I want to get some of that spray that you can spray around it, just to kind of mark it around so people can see pick this up you dirty but I'm not sure how that would go down with my my neighbourly relationships I don't think I want to do SoundCloud anymore I don't see, one podcast hosting is enough that's what I think besides, I get hardly anyone even listen to Spreaker anymore, I have Spreaker to SoundCloud what's the stats I mean literally today 69 plays,

that's on the Let Me Bore You To Sleep 541 the whole week, I mean come on that's just silly, it's a silly amount although there was a time when I'd be happy with that 69 69, I'm not talking about the number I'm just saying the amount, I'd be happy to get 69 plays, I don't even get that on YouTube my YouTube channels really is honestly on a good day I can get like hundreds but still that's generally if I upload a video of Vinnie running around, those videos,

the short videos they get views it's a very slow process on YouTube these days for me it's alright, I don't mind, I'm not that invested in YouTube as I used to be, I just think it's like an alternative place to listen to my stuff but I'm ok, it's fine so what I've done I've been going on to ChatGPT trying to figure out the different things that I can use so I've got Evernote which is somewhere I can store messages and notes and that seems to be going I think I can search through stuff so I'm using these different tools,

trying to find which ones will be best for me to write my book Vinnie started barking, you know what I've had something to eat but I'm hungry you know what I'm hungry for? Chocolate chocolate and cakes, that's what I want but I've got nothing, I've got zero, I've got some bananas today but they're right, can you control yourself? please, yeah? Vinnie started barking, that's the problem with doing recordings late because there's no good time really I don't know, there is, is there?

I'm not sure he's pretty good yeah he barks in the morning if I get deliveries you know like post stuff I've got the window open so that probably doesn't help you know what, I only found out tonight I say tonight, it was about half five but, because I really believed that we hadn't had any snow, no snow here and apparently the whole country's got loads of snow, nothing where I live I'm talking nothing, heavy winds, lots of rain cold, that's it well apparently, over the weekend I think it was Sunday morning at about 1.30 the place was completely covered in snow for about five minutes and I've spoken to two people that confirmed this to be the case I was like why?

I didn't get to see it I love snow, I love snow at night because it's like day time you know if you go out at night, three o'clock in the morning the darkest time, two o'clock let's say, two to three in the morning and it's snow everywhere you don't need street lights, it's just bright it's amazing because the moon I suppose it depends if there's a moon because sometimes when there's no moon it's kind of like the night sun isn't it so you've got the reflection of the moon onto the snow but still,

I just love the snow I mean it's better during the day because I can watch it from outside, not from inside watch it outside when I'm inside but then I probably wouldn't need to mention outside because the snow is always going to be outside unless I had a snow machine inside but then why would I have a snow machine inside?

that would be ruinous to my dwelling ruinous I thought I saw a big flake of snow earlier outside, now I wasn't shaking my head it wasn't dandruff, no, I thought I saw it was like this little cloud just floating down I got very excited very you know very interested in that moment, what's going to happen next will I see another one, will I then see another one will it be even more, will it snow and I love the snow, I love watching it I love seeing it just coming down heavy oh yeah,

I do I mean really, we don't get a lot of it where I live we have had snow the last time I remember any kind of proper snow was in December 2022 December 2022 because that's when I got Vinnie blimey, that's a weird year that was, 2022 as weird as 2023 probably not, as weird as 2024 I'm not sure I want a year that isn't weird, I don't want it to be a weird year, I want it just to be a nice a nice focused year of me writing the worst book in history yeah,

so the amount of files, PDF files which is like a word file it's a format you can read it's a digital file, digital text file and I've got 1200 and whatever amount, they're not all transcribed yet, but I do have, I think I have about 1000 transcribed maybe 900 so what I've been doing is I'm now I've updated my Google Drive to 2TB so I'm now in the process of uploading, so I've got a file which is transcribed Let Me Bore You To Sleep and there are 1, 2, 3, 4,

5, 6, 7, 8, 9 9 folders, so there's the 1 to 50 51 to 100, 101 to 150, 151 to 200 201 to 50, 251 to 300 301 to 350 351 to 400 and 401 to 450 that's what I've got so far and I'm just trying to basically just trying to add all of them into that file and I think I think, I think, I think, I think I should be able to then use the files directly from Google Drive in ChatGPT and what I've been doing so I'm now doing 451 to 500,

so I'm going to add the file upload 450, no, 450 what was it, 451 to 500 so I'm doing that, I'm just clicking them all and I'm going to upload them so what I've been doing is getting a summary, so I'll tell you what I wrote in ChatGPT, please summarise no, stop it, please summarise so, and then what I've done is I've gone to each PDF file and I've copied all the text and just posted the text into ChatGPT so please summarise, so so far I've summarised 20 recordings and then once I've got that summary,

I've posted it in Evernote and so I'll give you an example it says in Evernote, it's because ChatGPT will not store that stuff, so I need somewhere, so summary of number 20, Let Me Bore You To Sleep, 24th of April 2018, Jason welcomes listeners to the session and humorously notes his rumbling stomach, that's one of my favourite things is humorously noting my rumbling stomach I did actually have, actually, I actually did have a rumbling stomach earlier, so you nearly heard me talk about it again but instead of talking about my rumbling stomach I ate something he reflects on his tiredness,

a common state when starting recordings and makes light hearted connections to the movie Alien, ok, not quite sure how that went acknowledgement of listeners Jason expresses gratitude to his audience for their support, he shares his desire for more people to discover his work and notes the growing numbers on platforms like SoundCloud, iTunes and Spreaker ok, so this is just a summary of one of the podcasts, I've done 20 so far, but it takes a while, Muses on hacking incident, ok, what's this?

Jason recounts an unsettling email about unauthorized access to his Google account, leading him to change passwords and deactivate his Facebook and Twitter accounts temporarily he humorously ponders why anyone would want to impersonate him joking about the disappointment they'd face trying to access his bank account Andre the Ferret, so this is the headline for this one, Jason shares a story about walking Andre on a country lane, letting him explore while managing his lead, he humorously describes Andre's fascination with fitting into small holes and his insistence on daily walks regardless of the weather,

that is something about Andre he did not care what the weather was he wasn't a big fan of rain but we did get down there, Vinnie's exactly the same he was like, I wanna go out, I wanna go out, I wanna go out, get down there and he'd just look outside and try to get back upstairs they're both very similar like that, but when it came to snow, Andre loved the snow Vinnie it was snowing the first week I got him,

I got him on a Saturday and it started snowing I think it snowed all the way through the week I lose track I think it snowed Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and then Wednesday, I think it all disappeared it was really heavy snow something like that, that's my memory, it might not be correct it definitely snowed in December it was near the beginning yeah, but Vinnie liked the snow Andre liked the snow, especially as I dressed him up as Father Christmas or Santa Claus, I dressed him up all like that,

nicely and he dug into the snow and when he came up his costume was gone never saw it again seriously, he did not like being dressed up but he looked so cute and what does it say, reflections on relaxation vs activity, Jason contrasts his preference for relaxation with the idea of running explaining that he values calmness over unnecessary exertion, lazy in other words, he reflects on his he reflects on his this is how it's worded on here I didn't want it to be in a first person, I just wanted to talk about me,

what I've spoken about and then I can delve deeper into each bit he reflects on his unconventional lifestyle as a ferret walker joking about being perceived as part of the dog walking community, which I was I was, people knew me, people knew Andre, people actually say hello to him I tell you what, no one knew me I only knew him and when I started going out with Vinnie taking him out after about 6 months of people talking to me and talking to Vinnie and all that stuff I started having a few people saying, didn't you used to have a ferret?

I said yeah oh, it's you it's the ferret man and that happened for a bit, I had to explain what happened to Andre but it was kind of no one knew who I was, they knew who he was it's a little bit like that with Vinnie as well, a lot of people know Vinnie's name so reflections on relaxation humorous tangents I don't go on tangents Jason delves into unrelated but amusing topics no I don't, I don't know why these AI search things come up with this stuff, I am very to the point I stick to

the subject always tables and rebellion at the cost of furniture, rebellious acts like putting feet on tables and his distaste for social norms, such as eating with an open mouth what?

romantic anecdotes speculates humorously about first dates, imagining unconventional scenarios like partners enjoying nose picking or farting at dinner, that does not sound like anything I would say power tools and masculinity shares a humorous reflection on a momentary desire to embrace stereotypical manly behaviours like using power tools despite it not aligning with his personality I'm sorry I think I am an alpha male obviously hot cross buns nostalgia, so this is just from one recording Jason fondly recalls eating hot cross buns as a teenager in his first flat accompanied by a cup of tea and watching Wurzel Gummidge on a black and white TV he explains his current grilling method for hot cross buns,

emphasising its practicality and how it optimises enjoyment what on earth thoughts on football Jason shares an anecdote about watching football at a pub and being chastised for not knowing which team was England I think it was cricket actually, not football no it was football, yeah, blimey yeah, yeah, no that was a separate one I got chastised for cricket as well but there was a big football match going on and I'm watching it and I said a little bit too loudly which team is England because I didn't have the normal white and whatever uniform on the costume they wear,

didn't have the normal one on and it was a busy pub I couldn't see the screen very well so yeah, I got a few weird looks, I think I was lucky to get out there he humorously reflects on his lack of interest in football and sports in general, instead preferring activities he finds more meaningful relaxing ooh, I'm such a snob themes of acceptance and humour Jason muses on societal expectations rebellion and the absurdities of everyday life his light hearted approach to mundane topics like grilling hot cross buns or signing his

name creates a calming atmosphere so this is just one recording it's there's a lot more to come so I don't know how I'm going to organise it all but at least I've started, see aren't you proud of me, course you are closing remarks, Jason wraps up by thanking listeners and encouraging them to share his work he emphasises the relaxing and sleep inducing effect of his voice bidding his audience farewell with warmth and humour humour so key features, tone and style, casual, humorous and reflective,

blending mundane anecdotes with playful storytelling creates a calming and relatable environment for listeners this is what this says about the recording themes, relaxation promotes calmness and detachment from daily stresses humour, light hearted takes on everyday topics and personal quirks nostalgia, fond reflections on past experiences like eating hot cross buns ok I didn't realise I was so nostalgic about hot cross buns there you go, number three, purpose so the purpose of the recording is to provide a soothing narrative that lulls the listeners into relaxation and sleep and then it says to connect with the audience through candid and humorous storytelling this session showcases Jason's ability to turn ordinary life moments into engaging calming narratives,

fostering a sense of connection and comfort through his audience what a load of waffle what on earth are they talking about? it sounds good it sounds so good 451 that's weird 451 to 500 does that mean there's not a lot in there? 451 to 500 why didn't it do all of them? that's very strange 451 to 500 but it's only done up to 459 so I'm going to go back into the drive transcribe 451 to 500 oh it has got all of them how weird, I wonder why it did that will I ever know?

probably not, probably never know why do I need to know why? probably not still need to get rid of that metal thing sticking out it's annoying me 451 to 500 which means I now need to do 501 501 to 550 550 yeah 501 to 550 and now upload file upload 501 to 5 501 to 500, no 501 to 550 even that's not right it's little things like numbers that can make a difference 501, do you remember the 501 genes does anyone remember them?

that was such a big thing when I left school, like 86 86, 87, 88 or even 85 85, 86, does anyone remember Nick Kamen each time you break my heart the little voice inside me cries each time you break my heart do do do do do do do do do do do do do do because he was made famous he was made famous for those adverts where he'd go into a laundrette and take his jeans off and put them into the washing machine and wash them and they'd just sit there

in these white boxes it's not a very realistic scenario I can honestly tell you from experience it's not how things play out I mean first of all if you've only got one pair of trousers then they're not going to be very clean are they, when you take them off and if you've only got one pair of trousers, chances are you've only got one pair of pants, and there's his pants were white just saying, I don't think it would have been very hygienic him sitting on a bench,

or did he sit on the end of the washing machine, or did he sit on the dryer they had a good time so yeah, unrealistic, but didn't they do a similar thing with either it was coke or pepsi, I don't know or was it diet coke, where they had the men drilling they had ladies in an office looking down ogling them I was very, I was disappointed because after all those years of fighting for equality I just, you know, I just couldn't believe the adverts would do stuff like that I can't talk about it,

it's too soon 1986 but I remember Nick Caiman, I think he was Madonna took Nick Caiman under her wing and you know, he got that song let's have a little look about Nick Caiman Nick Caiman he's not around anymore unfortunately but it was only 59, no he was English I did not know that, I didn't know that I thought he was American, I just I never heard him talk either Neville Nick Caiman yeah, I don't think Neville or either Caiman Neville Caiman, Nick Caiman it sounds right doesn't it, Nick,

but then it would do wouldn't it you know, because we know it some really weird names, Charles Bukowski it would sound weird if it wasn't Charles Bukowski if it was Charles Peters, like no, doesn't sound right but that would, that metal thing sticking out of this bed, this desk I wonder if it's just going to be there for years and I'm never going to move it I'm just going to keep banging it, bashing it so he was a model, early life he was born in Harlow, Essex in 1962 seventh of eight children,

blimey god, can you imagine having seven brothers and sisters four sisters and three brothers oh that sounds awful I mean I had three brothers that was enough, but blimey add four sisters onto that, that would just yeah, that's too much in 1982, Caiman appeared in a video for the Damned Don't Cry it was a video for the band Visage, but he first came to the public's attention in 1984 when he was featured on the cover of The Face it's a magazine, the cover showed him wearing a ski hat lipstick,

orange roller neck sweater and aviator sunglasses okay, he didn't come into the public attention in this country doing that, well maybe he did, I was 13 or whatever, so I've probably, I've never heard of The Face I guess it's about faces, I imagine but yeah, this next bit is true he's widely known in the UK for his role in the 1985 Levi's Laundrette commercial, where he stripped to his boxer shorts in a 1950's style laundrette, while he waited for his blue jeans to wash one of the yeah, one of the series of Bartle Bogle Hegerty advertisements that increased sales of Levi 501's the commercial ranked 6th in the 100 greatest TV adverts in 2000 okay what was the song?

I won't be afraid won't you stand by wasn't that the song? I won't play it for copyright and detail reasons but I'm not going to get copyright struck for singing it, because no one's going to know what I was singing Cayman's musical success was mainly in Europe, his first single was in 1986 UK number 5 hit, each time you break my heart, from his eponymous debit album, what does eponymous mean anyone?

I'm going to look it up, because it's going to bug me if I don't, what does eponymous mean? should we just ask copilot? eponymous, go on tell me, the term eponymous means something that gives its name to something else, what? in the context of musical albums or books, it usually refers to works that are named after the artist are named after the artist or author themselves for example, Nick Cayman's 1987 album is called Nick Cayman, making it an eponymous album is that all it is?

is that all such a big, long, weird word means? it just means he's named it after himself, so if I write a book call it Jason Newland, sexy Newland, I've named it after myself, is that it? so Tracy Chapman's album was eponymous, because it was called Tracy Chapman that's a long word for it just seems unnecessary mind you, I'm never going to forget it now the song was written and produced by Madonna isn't that good?

I've got a good memory, haven't I, sometimes I wonder if people think that I research all this before I talk, I don't I think it's obvious I don't, actually, but I do sometimes surprise myself with my memories of the most mundane, pointless information I mean, how many people out there would remember well, first of all, probably a lot of people don't even know who Nick Cayman is or don't remember him, and those that do, might not remember that he did a song, and those that do remember might not remember,

or they do now if I'm talking to them might not remember that it was Madonna that produced it she also sung background vocals so it was her song that she wrote with Stephen Bray who was her long time collaborator so her original demo remains one of many unreleased Madonna songs by the artist herself loving you is sweeter than ever loving you is sweeter than ever and that was a number 16 follow up in the UK so that was loving you is sweeter than ever so he was quite popular in Europe his second album in 1988 was called Us,

I don't know if there's a special word for something that isn't named after yourself I mean, that's kind of moving in a different direction altogether isn't it going from Nick Cayman to Us is it part missing thing thing thing, whatever that word was it was produced by another Madonna frequent collaborator Patrick Leonard Madonna again made an appearance with background vocals on the song Tell Me, this time without contributing to the song writing or production.

The song was a hit in Italy in the summer of 1988, spending nine weeks at number one, wow, that's good I'm not laughing, I'm just, I don't know I do wonder I do sometimes wonder, some of the songs how something becomes so popular in one country and isn't elsewhere who was the singer that was really really popular in China I mean we've had artists here that have been really popular in America and then come over here or come back here because they actually live in the UK but they've become popular in America first which is probably most artists dreams,

recording artists in this country because it's just such a much bigger audience I mean there were times you could have a number one single and a number one, you know, three number one singles and a number one album in the UK but having a top ten hit in the billboard charts in America, you could end up much wealthier than you would having a number one album in this country it's strange the way it works but then, you know,

such a small country compared to America and then once something's big in America it automatically spreads Kamen's Third Blimey It says I promised myself, I thought it said something else I just read the last three letters of the middle word The song reached number ten in several European countries It's a bit like David Hasselhoff, isn't it?

Huge star in Europe, especially Germany I tell you what I know not everyone's a boxing fan but I find it very interesting to see the different reactions of the crowds of the audience at a boxing fight like in England in England, it's rowdy you know, it's noisy, in America, it's noisy but then in Japan everyone sits quietly and respectfully it's so different, I mean you can literally hear the punches in the ring and Germany, it's very similar, very kind of fairly quiet and they observe it and then you go somewhere like Croatia or Bulgaria and

they're quite rowdy I say rowdy as in noisy Australia, very noisy they're just, it's like a fun event like a night out I guess I guess it's a bit different, isn't it?

Culturally, just culturally even in something as random as boxing, the audiences are different not all the time, obviously came and appeared on UK television singing on Top of the Pops, 27th November 1986 ah, in 1988 European single Bring Me Your Love has a Cantonese cover version sung by oh actually it's got it in brackets, actually it's got like Chinese words Norman Chung, which was titled Are You Alone reached number one on the airplay charts in Hong Kong in 1989, but how did it do in China?

they're moving all around here you talk about China, then you start talking about Hong Kong I never knew he was English wow, it's weird it's strange, he's kind of iconic in my, what were the 80s because of the advert I suppose we've all got our own little memories of what's iconic to each of us individually, I suppose like to me, an iconic song was What's the Colour of Money What's the colour of money, what's the colour of money don't tell me that you think it's green,

me I know it's red and that was Hollywood Beyond I think it was was it, what's the colour Hollywood Beyond, did I say Hollywood Beyond I did, I did I thought they were American as well, they're not, they're from Birmingham What's the colour of money, 1986 it reached number seven in the UK charts in America, was then released see I can't get my head around that, how can such an amazing song not have been shared in the biggest western country that is the biggest one isn't it, depends what you class as west,

I mean Russia is west isn't it, or is it east I don't know it's no, west western country, America's the biggest, mind you Canada's big in America isn't it, but I'm talking about audience wise what do you mean Canada's big in America, no it's not OK let's check which is bigger, Canada Canada has a larger land area coastline and population than the US no it doesn't, it doesn't have a bigger population, that's ridiculous the land of Canada is bigger than that of the United States while the United States is about two thirds the size of the African continent,

half the size of Russia and over twice the size of the European Union it is slightly smaller than Canada Canada occupies a total area of 3,855,100 square miles making it the second biggest nation in the world, while the United States occupies an area of approximately 3,796,742 square miles wow, Canada has a longer coastline than the United States, Canada has the longest shoreline in the world, which is over 151,019 miles long the exclusive economic zone of both the United States and Canada is 200 nautical miles, I've got no idea what that means,

so even though Canada is the second biggest country on earth right after Russia and larger than, so Canada is bigger than China and India, because they're huge countries aren't they mind you India so Canada, Russia is the biggest than Canada, than America, and larger than the United States, a huge percentage of its territory is dominated by tundra and forest I'm sorry, tundra I know what forest is the tundra is a unique and fascinating biome biome characterized by its cold temperatures, low participation Jimmy Rain, and distinctive plant and animal life,

found in the arctic and sub-arctic regions, as well as high elevations in mountains tundra landscapes are often covered in permafrost, a layer of permanently frozen soil short growing I can't get this sorted out once and for all, precipitation just means rain doesn't it, oh it's not allowing me to search that one that's weird, I don't know why they have to use words like that precipitation, rainfall it says rainfall doesn't it precipitation precipitation so precipitation is a process of water falling down to earth's surface in a liquid or solid state,

rain it's rain, why call it precipitation when it's rain, why use big words it's rain, it is one of the main parts of the water cycle which moves water around the planet precipitation occurs when water vapor in the atmosphere condenses and falls under the influence of gravity, rain rain, and snow I mean all the water on this planet, stays in this planet, on this planet, it moves around doesn't it, but it stays, so it never leaves as a planet we're never going to run out of water because it just moves somewhere else when it dries up,

moves away and it precipitates somewhere else I just like the weather people, it's going to be a high chance of precipitation during the night ok, and this is like in the summer, maybe July why can't they just say rain, because ok, in the winter precipitation could be hail, it could be slush, I suppose it could be snow it could be rain sleet, that's the word I was looking for slush but in July, I mean you can get hail, I've seen hailstones in the summer, very weird very strange, I remember when I was about 7,

the first time I saw that proper hailstones, they were huge, mind you I was very tiny at the time, so they might have just been normal size but they've just fallen down in the earth like careless meteorites made of ice very weird, they were strange and then before you know it, they're gone problem with happening in the middle of June, July, so don't settle precipitation learn the meaning of precipitation in weather, chemistry and formal context find out how to use precipitation in sentences and collocations with related words and phrases rain,

snow, sleet, hail just say it say what it is there's a good chance of snow or rain good chance of precipitation could be anything a little bit too vague a bit too vague you might as well just say there might be some weather tonight just leave it up to us to figure it out ourselves or the old fashioned way, look out a window you don't know if it's raining, stick your hand out the window hands better, I did that the other day I don't know, is it still raining?

so I put my hand out the window, my neighbour started waving at me from the garden, like oh no human contact so that's what I'm doing with the Google Drive so I'm uploading, which is going quite well kind of, I mean oh, that's weird so, I've got 501 to 550 so far, rename I think that's one last one 501 to 550, new folder 551 to 600 save that, so tomorrow by the end of tomorrow I should have, because I'm not going to be able to make any recordings during the day,

so what I'll do is probably make sure I upload the rest of those by the end of the day and then do some more summaries of the recordings and you know, just see how it goes in it, you know what I mean 551 to 600, so add 551 to 600 no, it's all done, so I have to go back I have to go back to Turbo Turbo Transcribe so if I clock in here Turbo Transcribe 551 oh, I've done it all, oh no no,

did I say 551 to 600 I've got 1000 done 551 to 600, blimey I really didn't realise, 551 to 600 551, so download export folder as a PDF download, wow who'd of thought so I can go back into that, Google and just upload, add new files file upload, go into downloads click on that, no, it's uploaded zip, I didn't want that, download, delete, move to zip right, I'm going to have to unzip it that still sounds funny, I'm so immature extract all, ok, extract all done, 50 items, so what I'll do now,

go back, this would be more interesting if you could actually see what I was doing actually it wouldn't do to be honest it wouldn't, so 551 551 552, where's where's 551 then, oh I don't know 551 to 600 let's upload those so yeah, it's pretty cool I'm just getting them done, it's kind of it's like this is the foundation, sort of and then I'm going to summarise all of them and then start to break up the recordings and save in different folders using ever green is it,

evernote and you know just sort of figure out, because the amount of times I've mentioned Andre or the amount of times I've mentioned working in the pub when I was 18 or doing karate as a kid, all those different things that were really boring I thought I could perhaps write a book on each subject just a really boring book, not like a big book obviously, I say obviously but I imagine that you know a hundred page book something like that, but just have it so rewrite it and tell the story,

but in my just type it out, but make it really boring like even more boring, so it's something you could read and fall asleep reading maybe, or you just get so tired reading it, that you need to just put it on your bedside turn your light off and go to sleep you might instantly fall asleep so I might do that, just a bunch of books, one called Andre the ferret, one called Vinnie, the Jack Russell one called,

although I don't yeah I suppose I could talk about him I could do one about different things the chip shop and just go into a little bit more a bit too much detail, like really boring details, as opposed to the excitement that I normally talk about so that's what I'm kind of thinking of doing, which means there'll be lots of books, but it'll just be small books, they'll be available on Kindle, maybe I can make them available as paperback, just because that'd just be cool for me,

it's easy to do a Kindle not easy, I mean, it's easy once it's formatted in a sense of, there's a procedure you go through in order for it to be available on Kindle but I would the idea of having, imagine having a book, like an actual physical book that I've written and I'll be writing it with the help of myself because I can be, my memory can be reminded, because I've got all these once I've been through 1,200 recordings and I've got the transcripts of all of them and I will summarise and go through start going through each one and tell me find me information where I've spoken about Andre,

or find me information where I've spoken about the comedy club or, I can't think of anything else I've done in my life, but yeah, just something like that and then, I mean so far I'm just going to move this out of the way for a second I went through 70 the first 70 recordings that I did the Let Me Bore You To Sleep recordings and I asked for them just, this is on ChatGPT I think, I asked for it to number all the recordings where I mention Andre so I mention him on 4,

5, 8, 9 15, 16, 19, 20, 25 26, 28 30, 36 37, episode 42 43, 44, 45 46, 47 48, 49, 50 51, 52 53, 54 55, 56, 57 58, 59, 60 64, 66 67, 68 and 70 I'm not sure how many that is so I'm going to have to count them 1, 2, 3 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 16, 17, 18 19, 20, 21, 22 23, 24, 25 26, 27, 28, 29, 30 31, 32, 33 34, 35, 36, 37 38,

so out of 70 recordings I have managed I've spoken about him and mentioned Andre 30, how many times 30 something times I would recount it but I can't be bothered so in order for me to write about him whether it was a chapter of my book because if I just did one book, one book about my life a boring life, probably is what I'll call it I don't know at least one chapter would need to be devoted to Andre at least one chapter would need to be devoted to my Nan at least one chapter would need to be devoted to martial arts karate,

different things I've done there I'd say at least one chapter would need to be devoted just to the karate maybe not, I probably could spread it through at least one for that I'd need at least one chapter for all the different places I've lived another chapter for all the different jobs I've had but they would be huge chapters it's really going to be difficult to condense every single yeah, it'd be hard to do that, to condense so much into one one chapter plus there's my childhood that's broken up into two parts,

pretty much two parts before the ages of 6, before the ages of 7 and after the ages of 7, so before 7 then 7 to 15 and then my childhood was over at that point so that kind of is a break at 15 that's when things came to an end on that side, but 7 is when things began, like a new life kind of started well it did, it definitely did I think he's going to bark in a minute, I just heard sound downstairs and in some ways I feel I'd need to put,

like I'd need a chapter for the comedy I think I'd need a chapter just for the insurance companies that I worked for because that's been quite a big impression on me I'd need a chapter for Buddhism I would need a chapter for my mental health stuff as well that's a huge, been a long running thing there's a lot of different, it's weird kind of mapping it out as I speak, it'd just be such a long book I think maybe I'll just try and, because I can you might have noticed or not,

but I can talk, I have the ability, I just wonder if I if I, in my mind, publicly decide to make the books boring that way if anyone says, oh this is boring, it goes on and on and on it's like, well it's supposed to and if anyone says, oh this is so boring it's sent me to sleep, well it's supposed to I can win, it's a win win situation or if someone says, oh that was really interesting and motivational, it's like, brilliant, thanks even though it wasn't supposed to be,

it's like, ok, I'll take that yeah, I thought about at the end of each year going forward, doing a summary of the previous year, just a summary of my year, what I've been up to, maybe mentioning some of the things that's gone on in the world but probably not, to be honest, just focus it on me that was a weird noise I just got a notification on my phone what did that say, what did it say what does it say oh, money's been taken out, brilliant thanks wonderful and right,

that's it really, so that's what I've been doing that's what I'm going to do tomorrow, during the continuous building work that's going on downstairs what I'll do is, when I get up in the morning, I'll upload this I'll edit this and upload it and right now I'm just going to probably watch EastEnders on playback and then head to bed, probably yeah I wish I had something like rice pudding to eat it's a weird one, I just got that could really do with like a little something the only thing I could do probably is just have some toast so maybe I'll do that,

just have a slice of toast, maybe that's just what I need maybe just carbohydrates or something I don't need it, but I've had a roast dinner, not a roast dinner I had a cooked dinner with vegetables yeah I could do with a nice biscuit, like a ginger nut ginger nut biscuits, mmmm pure sugar but yeah, it's not a good idea so let's not do that, I might have some toast though treat myself, I mean there's nothing stopping me from just having a little bit of cereal in a bowl is there just a little bit,

not a lot, just a little bit just you know, a few spoonfuls just a small snack, but then do I need that at twenty past nine in the evening be Easter soon, all those chocolate eggs can't eat chocolate anymore can I, never mind so, I'm gonna go thank you for listening and I know, you know, we're already six days into the new year, but happy new year, I'm gonna keep saying it I might just say it till I annoy someone, happy new year, happy new year merry Christmas, happy Easter happy Thanksgiving, happy birthday guaranteed someone

listening to this now, it's your birthday, so happy birthday remember to be kind to yourself, be gentle with yourself, because you do deserve to be happy, lots of love bye

Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.