(music) Sunday’s Papers | LMBYTS #1351 | 11th May 2025

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

Now, Vinnie's in the background. I am making a video. A video! Which I haven't done for a while.

And I'm not 100% sure why I'm doing one now. But hey, here I am. I'll tell you part of the reason why I'm doing one.

Part of the reason is because let's see if I can get my YouTube channel up. Nope. My YouTube? Me? Me? Me? Where's my channel? Right.

Okay. Oh, yeah, got it. Now I was trying to see when the last the last time I did an actual video was.

It's a while ago. And up to now, recently. Okay, here we are.

Here's the videos and see how far down. I've been uploading six versions of my videos as a podcast. It's very hot in here.

Not only is it hot outside, the windows open. All the curtains are drawn. I've also got one, two, three, four lights light over there, light over there, light over there and a light up there.

All trying to make the room a bit brighter. Now, if I put the camera on the windowsill, I would actually probably wouldn't need any of those lights. But in order for me to do that, I'll have to move everything around.

And I'll be honest, I can't be bothered. So this will have to do. Plus the backdrop will be I don't know.

I mean, the backdrop isn't great now. But at least we've got Vinnie doing whatever he's doing. And yeah, you got my bookcase.

Well, three bookcases with some of my books. All of my books, actually, not some. But no, some are there as well.

In front of me. Why is that? Why have I got all those books there? There was a reason. There was a reason.

I can't remember what the reason was. Oh, well. So yeah, I'm doing this on.

It's a video. But it was will also be my podcast. So today is Sunday papers.

Sunday papers. I just want to go back and see. No, it's not letting me if I go to videos.

Now it's not let me see the last time I did an actual video video. Oh, well. What are my most popular videos? Number 23, relaxation, hypnosis, stress, anxiety and panic attacks.

Second to that is calm your mind. Then I did another one called power cuts, which was a Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Number 913.

Sleep hypnosis weekly. Oh, it's really weird. I tell you what I found.

That's part of the reason I'm doing this video. It's because I was watching a couple of old videos of mine. And I found it quite interesting.

First of all, to see how much I bloody aged. I mean, blimey. I said the naughty word sorry.

It's just ridiculous. You know, my first video is from I look at my old videos. Oldest video.

No, it's not going to give it to me. I've got a video from 2007 on my YouTube channel. I think it's just under really old videos playlist.

I've also got so I've got from 2007 onwards. So I got stuff from 2008 2009 2010 1112 1314 15 probably pretty much most years during that period. But I was less productive video wise over the last 10 years really.

But I have made videos during that period. I mean, there's one I did in 2020. I think or 2021 I think is 2020.

My beard was out here is like a huge, really, really big beard, like massive beard. And now some might be thinking that sounds sexy. You're wrong.

Okay, it was really I mean, I might do another beard. I might. Every now and then I get the urge.

I think one of the only reasons that stops me now is back then my beard wasn't gray. It was graying. But it wasn't gray now.

I grow this a lot of it's going to be gray. It's not all gray yet, but a lot of it. So it's weird.

And I was watching this video from first of all, from 2007. And I, it was, it was in color or black and white. I forget.

I think it might be. I don't know. So I did some black and white ones, because it I look better in black and white than color.

Just the picture was better quality because it was a webcam I was using. And I, I was talking about why I was doing what I was doing. Got flies in there today, having a window open don't help.

Or it does help to have flies in it, I guess. It's really advantageous. If you want flies.

No, I don't want flies. I really don't. But they come in anyway, they're not invited.

Like a lot of the residents in this part of the in this estate, they try to get in. They're not they're not invited, but they still try to get in. Got a few house breakers around here.

Had downstairs broken into about six, seven weeks ago. Apparently another place up the road got broken into. So we have to be a little bit vigilant to make sure that we can keep everything safe.

Right. So I was talking about how my main passion was chronic pain. Helping people with chronic pain.

And this was in 2007. And I quite like that. It was like, you know what it was.

And it kind of still is really I mean, I started off doing three things. That was my focus. Chronic pain relief, relaxation and sleep recordings.

That's the three things I I kind of did. So I thought that would kind of cover the spectrum of audience that would find find use in what I do. And the weird thing about it is what's not weird, really, but the chronic pain ones were the least popular out of the three.

They weren't unpopular, but they were the least favorite. And I kind of realized from getting feedback that a lot of people just listening to the relaxation or the sleep ones and getting pain relief anyway. So by the relaxation, they could get pain relief and fall asleep.

So it's kind of didn't necessarily need the focused and chronic pain relief sessions. Some welcomed them, some perhaps didn't need them. They were quite happy just to have me being super interesting and relaxing.

My voice is going crook here. Let me have some water, see if that helps. That's better.

Good. So I'm thinking, what should I do? Because I looked at the video. This is my normal voice, by the way.

I don't know why it was croaky earlier. And I, I, that wasn't, I can't keep that up. Can't keep up much, much these days.

Getting old. It's all about juggling. So I, oh there's a picture, there's a video of me with hair.

There was, I found a video of me with hair. I mean, there's lots of videos of me with hair because I've not always been a baldy, not always shaved my head. Although I have been shaving my head since 2003.

But on and off. It seems to be that I have kind of every six months, maybe every four months, I shave my head. So it gets to a point where it's just it, it just has to go.

So that's what I do. And I'm looking at the stats of some of these videos and I'm thinking, is it really worth me making a video? Because I don't get, not like they're getting millions of views. But anyway, that's just me being greedy.

So I was looking at these videos. So there's one from 2007, talking about chronic pain and basically talking about the whole thing that I was doing at that time, including the group sessions I was doing in the drug rehab place and a couple other things I forgot about actually. As well as the website, making recordings for people to download on my website.

And then I listened to a recording, a video rather, from I'd say probably 2009 when I was at university. I was having a proper moan, a real moan. And it wasn't like a, it was just a Jason Chats catch up.

That's all it was. Just like the other ones as well. Although I used to call them updates back then.

I don't think I started using the term Jason Chats until about 2011. And I'm sure I had some other names for them. I'm sure did I do the Beardy Man? I think I might have had a podcast known as the Beardy Man for a while as well, about 2011, 12.

So I was watching this video from 2009. So I'm in the, this is during the process, I think is when I was, I'm not a hundred percent sure. I think it was during the summer break.

And so I just completed the second year of university. I have one year left. And I hadn't started counselling yet, because I hadn't received my certificate for person centred counselling, my diploma rather.

I had to wait. I didn't get that until probably November. And then I started, or October, I started counselling in December 2009.

Once I got that, so that's when I started counselling. And that was a charity, a children's charity. But I remember I'm talking about how I was concerned like about the future, what am I going to do in the future, but I want to do this.

This is all I want to do. This is all I think about. And it's really strange that, I mean, how many years later is this? 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024, 2025.

It's over seven years ago. So it's not, it's 11. It's 16 years.

Yours. 16 years ago. There are, there are actually kids that weren't even born.

No, there was kids that would just be just born. That she'd like just being born on that day. They're now Lee have left school.

They're literally gone through the whole of childhood. And now at 16 have left school. Not everyone leaves school at 16.

But you can in this country. 16 years. In fact, there might be some that were born.

There were babies at that time, and now they've got their own kids. Wow. So yeah, it was kind of strange, because when I was at college, and I know, really, I realized this is, I've not mentioned papers yet.

I had mentioned them, but I've not actually read any papers. I'm going to, but I realized that sometimes it's just good to have you know, I mean, a little netter, a little chitty chatter, a little, plus, I just had a shower. I got new clothes, not new clothes, a lot of clean clothes on.

So I've had my yearly shower. And it's a lovely day. Forgetting my face, I look quite smart.

I mean, not like my face is my face. I mean, other than where makeup, I'm kind of stuck with it. Makeup or surgery, that's the only thing I've really got the options.

So I'm, yeah, this is me, this is what I look like. I could probably, I mean, I do trim, I trim my beard, because my beard grows longer and quicker. Wicker.

That's very whistly. My beard grows quicker than my hair. So I kind of trimmed my hair, my beard, so that it's nice.

This is about as short as ever going to get a little bit short and it'll be gone. So it's kind of, it's stubble, but it is kind of like a little beard, kind of ish. So this is manageable.

But it's also on my neck. So I suppose I could like shave, shave my neck to make it a bit more. So you can see that I've actually got a chin, maybe, I don't know.

I've got a chin somewhere. I think that, I don't know, I used to have about five chins. There are videos from the past, where you can watch me, and you can literally see the different chins wobbling.

And I mean, I'm not saying that there's no, I'm not, you know, I'm not saying it's completely tight. It's quite, quite tight. But yeah, I had a little bit of excess, a little bit of fat on my neck, I think, on the front of my neck.

I might still have, I might just be looking through different eyes, because I was in bed last night looking at my mobile phone. I was looking at some pictures, or some videos, actually, I was trying to read, just read the titles of the videos, and I couldn't. It was just too small.

Because up till now, my reading sight has been okay. Distance, but, you know, up close, generally. But yeah, it's kind of, my eyesight's gone a bit strange.

So I need to get, I need to get eye tested. And my glasses work. I mean, you know, if it wasn't, I can't even see the screen without my glass, the screen, the tree, I can't see the tree without my glasses.

I actually can, I don't know why I said that, the tree's bigger than the house I live in. You don't live in a house, you live in a flat. Yeah, but the building, that's what I meant.

There's a bit of a building, isn't it? But you said house, pedantic. So I found it interesting, just for myself from a, I don't know, from a memory perspective, to watch, rewatch that video from 2007. I know, well, both 2007 and 2009.

And see what I was talking about and what I was, you know, what I was like back then. In 2009, I was proper grumpy. But I was just, I think that was a bank thing, they took money out of a bank, and I was just like, because, you know, being a student, it wasn't exactly, there wasn't a lot of cash coming in at the time.

It was a little bit tight. But it was okay. But you know, during the summer, it was a little bit, because I did have some, I had some winter work.

So like in a store at Christmas, so that kind of gave me a little bit extra at that time of the year, which is handy. I mean, I've got videos here, there's a video here. New Year's Day, so it's number 71.

Let Me Bore You To Sleep. New Year's Day 2019. Right.

So I started in, I think, March 2018. Doing the let me boy to sleeps. There's a picture here, I'm gonna I can't open it up.

But what do if I can turn the volume down on here, right, I can play it. I mean, I can open up now I can make it a little bigger. So there's practically there's not really much gray in my hair.

Okay, my hair is not. It's quite short. There's a bit of the front a little bit of gray hair at the front.

But my beard, the only real gray bits were at the sides there, just there and there. And a little bit on my neck there. A few bits at the top, you know, but it was like, minimal, minimal, but noticeable.

And now, I just think that's weird. I wonder if Yep. Our little Andre is in that one as well.

So I'm picking him up. He's just like, Yep, a little boy. My little boy.

Then he's my little boy now. And yeah, yeah, that's your brother, Andre, your brother. Yeah, and I've got a really funny weird pain in my side.

Lovely. How nice. Oh, dear.

Anyway, I'll come out of that. So I suppose I spent last year telling you why I'm doing this podcast, why I'm doing this video. And I think part of the reason is because maybe it's something to look back on something to look at in the future.

For me, it might be completely pointless for other people. There's two reasons actually. Firstly, I do wish to make a book to write a book.

Secondly, for what I said before, it's quite nice to have a record of because I just like the idea of when I'm 80 or 85. I'm still doing these recordings. I don't know what I'm going to sound like when I'm 85.

But I think if people listen to me the whole time, my voice will gradually change. Hopefully, and people will just accept, accept how I sound, because I sound different to how I did in 2007. I was a little bit squeaky back then.

I'm a little less squeaky, still very squeaky, but less so less. So the other thing is the other reason, Vinnie's hassling me, he's been out, he's had everything he could possibly want, his food's down there, he's not touching it. Someone gave him a bone the other day, I just said the wrong word there, B-O-N-E, and he was staring at me.

See, if he got on my lap and said hello to you, I could probably feel a bit more, probably get him a bone. I keep saying the word. The thing is, right, he's got one, two, two complete ones there that he hasn't touched, and another one is half chewed.

So there's no reason why he's not chewing them ones. He just likes getting new stuff. Let's go have a drink.

Right, so that's a little bit, that little clip is probably something that Sebastian will probably take and turn into some kind of a weird video, me licking. Oh, shouldn't have done that. So the other thing, the other thing is that really, I think the idea that I think uploading the six recordings from my podcast onto YouTube, I forgot the name of the place, YouTube, it's not really working anymore.

It's not really, um, I'm not getting many views, compared to what I would if I was making videos. It's not that this video will get 1000s of views, but it will get more views than any of the other videos I've done since, since I did the last, the last time I did a video individually. None of the other stuff has got any, you know, hardly any views, because they're just static image with a podcast.

So I've got two things I could do, I could, I suppose I could just continue to upload the podcast, then upload the video as well. Or upload the podcasts, but just disclude the version, which is just like the normal version without music, which is this. Or I could do two versions, one with music, I could add music to this.

Maybe I've got to stop doing that I might get copyrighted. Oh, wait a minute. I doubt it.

To be honest, I could probably sing the most famous song out right now. And YouTube wouldn't recognize it because of my voice, which isn't fair. So we'll see.

This is today, tomorrow's tomorrow. And we will see how it's how it unfolds. So I'm just looking at newspapers, there seems to be less Sunday newspapers than normal.

Oh, no, is there? So I've got the Independent, Wales on Sunday, okay. Sunday Mail, The Observer, Daily Star, Sunday Express, Sunday Mirror, and the Sunday People. So it's 12345666 is the source but then sorry, is the Daily Mail is that is that Scottish paper was that? Because I could I know the Wales one, but I didn't know there was a Sunday Mail.

There's a Daily Mail. There's Daily Express. See, there's no times.

There's The Observer is, I don't know if I'm correct, but I think The Observer is almost like the Sunday version of The Guardian. But again, I don't know I used to read The Observer. I used to read all the Sunday papers.

In fact, I went for a period back in about 93 I would say yeah, about 93 where I was buying all the newspapers every day, reading through them and trying to get material out of them. Trying to get like jokes and stuff. That was 93.

So I'm not going to go to the Independent. What I do is I go to the Sunday Mail. Sunday Mail.

I wonder if it is a Sunday Mail. Sunday Mail. I wonder, I don't remember seeing the Sunday Mail before.

Scandal of Crisis Campus Jet Setter, a university boss whose staff, okay, he spent 37 grand on exotic junkets. What's a junket? Katy Perry, I'll always be dressed to kilt. Okay, I don't know what that means.

So let's have a look. What's the weather? What's the weather? I don't know why I said it twice. Today, Sunday.

Cloudy with sunny spells. Rain in Inverness and Edinburgh by evening. Rest of Britain, sunny with warm, sunny and warm with mild winds across Regions.

Outlook. Monday, sunny. Midweek, mostly sunny.

Friday, sunny intervals. That's good, isn't it? What else have we got here? The world weather. Amsterdam, sunny.

Athens, sunny. Barbados, shoes, showers. Yeah, they didn't have enough room to actually put showers.

So they put SHWRS. Barthelona, fair. Belfast, sunny.

I can do accents. Canary, okay, I can't do accents. Canaries, Canaries, showers.

Cothe d'Eltho, sunny. Dublin, Dublin, Dublin, sunny. Lisbon, I don't know where Lisbon is.

Is it in Jamaica? Lisbon, fair. London, isn't it? Sunny. Los Angeles, sunny.

Los Angeles, sunny. Okay, what else we got? Majorca, fair. New York, showers.

See, they're making this up, right? So this, this is a made-up place. Nicosia. I've never heard of any place called Nicosia in my life.

So why are they adding that? Is it a new place that is going to be something that the press are going to be promoting as a new holiday destination or Nicosia? Does anyone know where that is? Obviously, you live there, you're going to know, but I'm not saying it's made up. I'm not going down that rabbit hole again. Got in trouble with Belgium.

I love Belgium. I don't know why I can't help but because someone had a go at me for making fun of Belgium. And you got to remember, I only make fun of things that I, that I like.

You know, I'd only make fun of someone that I like. I wouldn't, I wouldn't make fun of someone I didn't like to their face anyway. Paris, so Nicosia.

Unless it's one of them places that are just renamed yet again. You know, that's getting a bit silly. Is okay, we decided we're going to re, they did that with, um, oh, what's it called? What's those chicken Kiev's? So for the last forever, as far as I'm aware, Kiev, because chicken Kiev's like, okay, that's a place Kiev.

And three years ago, the people in charge of this country decided that it's called Kiev. It's not Kiev. Does it matter? It matters to them.

But does it really? Everyone, everyone pronounces their own countries differently. We say Germany, it's Deutschland. We say France is France.

We say Spain, it's Espanol. You know, they, they don't, no one has a go at us for calling their names, their countries, the wrong name. You know, someone comes from someone, a tourist from Germany's here.

You say, Oh, you from Germany or are you from France? And I said, no, I'm from Germany. They won't say I'm from Deutschland. I don't know why I'm waving my hand around, but it's no one has a real problem.

We pronounce things incorrectly. That's what we're famous for. That's what we're good at.

Lidl, right? Lidl. If you know Lidl, it's a supermarket that sells it. I suppose they could sue me.

So okay, they sell. I've not been in it for a while. They when they first started, they it was like a really, really, really would would you say discounted store and we have stuff that you wouldn't even know what it was you were buying, because a lot of it would be well from other countries, Europe and that where if there wasn't a picture of the product, you might not know what it is.

I think is a little bit it's changed a little bit over the years, but it was I feel they've also got their own brand and stuff like Aldi's another one. But when they started advertising, they kept saying Lidl, Lidl, come to Lidl, like really trying to pump up be like, it's not Lidl, it's Lidl. Now they gave up.

They spent 20 years trying to do that. Eventually they gave up. Now the adverts say spend a little at Lidl.

Don't spend a lot, spend a Lidl. See now they're rhyming the Lidl realize that it rhymes with Lidl. So don't spend a lot, spend a little, don't spend a lot, spend a Lidl.

You know, so like they had to embrace the fact that people that shop at Lidl are not going to change the way they pronounce the name. Under any circumstances, especially if it's what were they trying to do that with another car now and I think that's because Hyundai, Hyundai, H-Y-A-N-D-I, I think it is. So everyone that's what they call it Hyundai, Hyundai.

And that's what everyone called it. And I worked in car insurance for many years. Not every car was a Hyundai, but Hyundai, Hyundai, whatever it was, however it was pronounced back then.

Recently, the adverts are going on like very patronizing to the customers as well. And I think they've even got an advert with it in the showroom said, no, it's not Hyundai, Hyundai, it's a Hyundai. It's like, what? It's a Hyundai.

So we need to put on an accent now, do we? When we say the name of the car we want. And I realized why is because I went online to search for something using just my voice wouldn't come up unless you did the accent, unless you like said it in a certain way. So they were basically, I think they realized that that was the error.

It was harder to find it because the algorithm or whatever online wasn't finding what people looking for. It's just like if I put in, see if I put in, I don't know, cabbage, if I type in cabbage and pressing, and my website comes up. Smelly cabbage picture of me comes up.

I don't know why that is. It's weird. Weird.

What other names are there? Other words? Because no one says in what I say, but a lot of European countries don't call us English or England. It's Anglais. You know, it's, it's just different.

We speak differently. We have different accents and stuff. That's okay.

I wouldn't dream of telling someone how to pronounce something. Even someone that lives here, that's English, because we've got such weird, well, we're different, different, not weird, different, just different regional accents. So people pronounce things very different.

So another one word, for example, tortoise, it's tortoise. But if you go to certain parts of the country, tortoise, tortoise. Well, that's how it's spelt, to be fair.

I mean, if someone if you want to teach someone how to spell tortoise, say tortoise. But there's a lot of words that are just, I would never like bath, bath, going to have a bath. I wouldn't dream of trying to educate someone.

I wouldn't, I wouldn't like try and correct someone for speaking like that, because it's just, just accents, isn't it? I mean, it's, I remember someone saying to me once, they corrected me on something I said, like the way I pronounce something. And I said, did you understand the word I said? You know, in the context of the sentence that I verbalized to you during that particular interaction?

He said, yeah. I said, because in order for you to actually correct me, you must have understood the context of what I was saying.

You must have understood what I meant in order to correct me. He said, yeah. Well, in that case, you didn't need to correct me, did you? Because the fact that you understood is pretty much the point of communication.

If you understood what I said, then communication's fine. What can get in the way of communication is picking apart what they're saying, and, you know, trying to correct them. Never a good way to do it.

I mean, maybe if you're at school, and you're a little kid, and you need to learn and stuff, you know, but even then, a bit of gentleness, maybe. I mean, that was 21 years ago, I should, 22 years ago, I should let it go, really, shouldn't I? Oh, talking about accents. This is actually in the paper, this is what we're supposed to be doing.

Edith's bad accent for a radio show. Proud Scott. Why would anyone be proud of where they're from? Just generally.

I was born in London, in North London. I had no say in it. If I was going to be proud of anything, it'd be something that I had accomplished myself.

Not something that just happened by chance. I'm going to be, it's like what, I'm proud that I've got a pink face. No, genetics.

I inherited this from my dad. It's not, I would not choose, I'm not, I'm proud. Proud I've got a tiny, anyway, let's not go down there, but weird.

I'm proud of where I'm from. Why? You've got nothing to do with where you're from. You can be proud of what you've helped build, you know, proud of the school you work at.

If you've contributed to that school and helped it become the success that it maybe it is. Yeah, be proud of that. Be proud of what you do.

Be proud of what you accomplish. But I'm proud because I was born here because I was squirted out at this particular venue. Therefore, I'm proud of being like, no, well, maybe if you want to be, but it just seems a bit weird.

So Edith Bowman, no problem with Edith, she's a lovely, lovely, proud Scotsman. Edith Bowman revealed a Scottish radio station told her to change her accent. The 51 year old DJ said she had bad feedback about her Fife accent when she did work experience at Radio 4th.

Radio 4th, which was studios in Edinburgh, the DJ who was brought up in just 50 miles from the capital, even considered elocution lessons. The mum of two said I'm so glad I stuck to my guns. I didn't have elocution lessons as being Scottish is who I am.

No, it's just where you were born. Who you are is who you are inside as the person. It's like, I'm 48% Irish.

What difference does that make? I'm going to keep telling you about it. But what difference does it make? I was born in London. I mean, that doesn't mean that I work on a market stall.

I have worked on a market stall. One of the best jobs in the world actually. I love to work on a market stall.

That's what I should have done. Because you're outside. You appreciate the summer when it's summer.

The winter is harsh, but it's still kind of invigorating. You get home, you feel you've done something. You're selling stuff.

You're providing service. You get to meet people. You get to the point where people are saying hello to you in the street.

Because that's where you work in the street. Yeah, that would have been good. I did work in the Elephant and Castle.

I worked on a market stall for just for the winter season. Yeah, these was the good old days. It was 1991.

And so the thing is, the weird thing like moaning about Scottish people's accent. You know, Scottish accent is one of the most popular accents for call centres. And of course, you need to pronounce your words like anyone doesn't matter where you're from.

Even if you're from if you've, you know, been raised and inside Eton University, you still need to pronounce your words and be clear, clearly spoken. Because you're on a radio, it's just standard, isn't it? That's doesn't going to go down well. But the Scottish accent is one of the most popular accents for call centres or for answer machine messages and things like that.

Used to be. So leave my Scottish friends alone. I love Scotland.

Edith. No, I do. I love it.

I don't even know who Edith is. It's one of those weird things that I talked about. She's like 51.

They told us something that happened like what? 40 years ago, or 30 years ago. You know, it's like, why are you talking about it now? Didn't really understand the whole pride thing though. Not I've got to be careful.

I don't mean obviously, being proud of your sexuality. That's really important. I'm not getting I'm not involving myself in that hornet's nest.

But I never really understood pride, really. Not really. Probably because I never heard the words, I'm proud of you.

So probably I didn't really, really kind of got it. Didn't never been never felt I've been proud of and I've never been proud of anyone. I've never had anyone to be proud of.

I don't have kids or anything. So plus, because I kind of took some of the religious stuff a bit, a bit literally, when I was younger, when I was a kid, you know, pride is something that's wrong. But you know, according to the Bible.

So it's really hard to kind of divide pride and arrogance, cockiness from each other, because I don't think I've ever had pride. I felt pleased. I've been really pleased with the results sometimes of things.

You know, if I get a really good day, and get the stats are good. Or if I get some positive feedback, I feel pleased. I'm not proud of myself.

I don't like that's me smoking a cigar. Actually, it could have been anything could have been Yeah, okay. But I that's I really I don't really feel pride.

I mean, I'm not house proud. Look at this place. It's a mess.

I don't. I'm house embarrassed. That's what I am.

I'm not I don't take pride in my appearance. I'm embarrassed by my appearance. Yeah, so I have embarrassment, not pride.

Yeah. Maybe my problem. Well, it's not high up on the list.

But I think one of my problems is perhaps I take these words too literally. And when the people say, I'm proud of being from Norwich, or I'm proud of being from Leeds, or I'm proud of wherever. I'm proud to be this.

You know, whatever is I'm choosing my words very carefully. Whatever. Yeah, it's like maybe they don't mean it literally is just and also, I've noticed I so this is a really funny thing.

If you see on on YouTube, there's a channel that pretty much is he's his whole thing is filming a spider there is filming inside the cashier of a shop. So he's behind the glass. And he basically winds up the customers and films them films their reaction.

And he there's one where he's given pink light pink lighters to the men coming in. Now, for some reason, there's no white men coming in at all. So he only filmed the only show so I would have liked to seen, you know, more than just one demographic.

But it's phenomenal. The response that he was getting from giving them a pink lighter to say do you want a lighter? Okay, pink? No. Even when he offered it for free.

No, don't want to pick get me a proper. I'm a grown ass man. I know.

I can't say those words. But the homophobia was ridiculous. So okay.

That's what I never understood. I actually had that myself. I had a friend who was non white.

And I've had more than one friend. But this is a particular person I was working in a call center with. And I sent him a card, happy birthday.

And he said, I think he sent me an email. He said, Thanks for the birthday card, but I'm not sure about the kisses. I was like, Are you serious? I'll send it back to him.

You serious? He said, Yeah, and the love hearts. I said, Come on, it's your birthday. Why you got to take things so seriously? Complain about anything else? Was it the the the envelope? So wrong color? Well, the envelope was pink.

I know. But you know, other than that, okay, other than the the love hearts, the kisses, the and the pink envelope, any other problems? The love poem. Declaring your love to me.

Little bit over the top. I said other than that, right, other than that, other than the love hearts, the kisses, the pink envelope, the love poem, if you want to call it a love poem, it was just a nice, friendly gesture to you. He said, you mean gesture said no gesture.

He said, No, it's pronounced gesture. So it's with a G. Not with a J, it's with a G. He said, Yeah, it's with a G. But it's gesture. I said, Why do you have to argue about everything? I love you.

He said, What would you mean? What did you say? So why have you got to argue about everything? He said, No, no, no, you, you said that. What did you say after that? I said nothing. I said, Why have you got to argue about everything? Whenever we talk, you can't get into arguments.

You're so cute in them jeans. What are you doing? Why are you saying stuff like that? Anyway, I find it weird. I've had that a couple of times like I put kisses on cards.

I just do. Because if I send cards out, especially Christmas cards, I don't really send them out. If it's to like neighbours, I send out the same cards to everyone.

But I know like, people, it's weird. It's some kind of masculinity. I guess, insecurity, I suppose.

It's got to be isn't it? It's kind of strange. I don't get it really. I mean, I'm not.

Yeah, I don't know. I just find it weird. So what else we got in the news? Right, Professor of junkets.

Okay, I've got no idea where junkets come from. What junkets? Thank you, everything. Entrepreneur Sir Tom Farmer.

Okay, I don't know. Migrants will need degree for work visa. Migrants will need to be qualified to graduate level to get a visa to work in the UK and the plans to be unveiled tomorrow.

Okay. I mean, to be fair, it's it's not easy to get visas for other countries. I mean, in Thailand, you're not allowed to work pretty much in any job that a Thai national can do.

There's like a huge long list of jobs that's illegal to do. So you can't go over there and work in a bar. You can't go in there, you can't help build the roads, you can't, you can't do any of that stuff.

And even if you take on a business, you can only have 49% of the business. The other 51% has to be owned. In fact, it might be might be less than that.

But there's a, you can only have a percentage of the business as a foreigner. In the same as if you buy a property. If you have a property with someone gets married, say get married, and for whatever reason, it doesn't work out.

The Thai person keeps the house because they have pretty much have full possession of it. Unless you've got a really good lawyer, and you're willing to spend the money and do the time, put the time in, you can kind of end up just losing everything, you know, that you invested. Oh, Billy Piper at the BAFTA event this week.

That's good. Stars. Oh, Marissa Abella.

Don't know who she is. Praise, praise our reindeers, Jessica and Richard. Acting up David Tennant.

He looks different for some reason. Gary Oldman and Toby Jones. These are people nominated.

Danny Dyer has slagged off EastEnders saying it's now not so good. The No Hold Bars account. Okay, this is funny, but I know exactly what he's going to say.

And I'm gonna, I've got a, I got a response for it. In a No Hold Bars account of his time at Queen Vic landlord Mick Carter, Danny, whose character was killed off in 2022 Christmas special, recalled how he was often drunk on set. Blimey.

He, he looks back fondly on his first three years on Albert Square, but he said then it became draining, emotional roller coaster. And what asked what he thinks of it, he said, Oh, it's not very good now, is it? Serves him right. So, so he said that EastEnders saved his career when it was at a low point.

And but he found his 2013 reception on Albert Square to be frosty. It's a very clicky place. We took the pub over from Jesse Wallace and Shane Ritchie.

They brought us in and they had the hump. Well, you just took their pub from them. Of course they can have the hump.

And wow. So yeah, he's not, he's not a big fan of the, of the thing. Not a big fan of the show anymore, which is, let's have a look since it's weird, right? Okay.

Okay. He's not saying what I thought he was going to say. And he's got a mustache.

It's not his fault. But when he just started EastEnders, I can't believe it was 2013. When he started EastEnders, he went to a festival and he got into a punch up or he got into an altercation, according to newspapers, an altercation from with someone that said that EastEnders was just miserable and depressing and just grim.

But it is. And I personally think that Danny Dyer was one of the best things that's happened to that soap for quite a while when he came into the soap. He was such a good character, such a nice character.

But every time a nice character comes into EastEnders, they literally chuck everything at that person. Every, every horrible thing that can happen, they chuck it at the nice character. And they did that with Danny Dyer, they did with his character.

It's really, really put him through it. And it's got to be hard. I mean, I just looking at Bianca, who's now left, well, she's currently left the show for a while.

I don't know, she's going back. You can see, I mean, after 30 odd years, that shows had a proper effect on her, I think. Like, acting, acting those roles and acting was horrible things.

It's got to be quite difficult. Cyber hit. I was told that there was a cyber attack on the co-op for someone that works in a co-op.

But I didn't see that on the news. It's quite weird. There's this, I don't go into things, there's this particular, really, really bad person that was being put in prison.

He did like, really bad thing. I mean, as bad as you get. And he it kind of, what he did, led to a lot of unease around the country and riots and stuff.

And now they're going about, oh, he's been attacking guards, prison guards. Like they're surprised that he's been acting violently. It's like, what? That's, it's gonna, you know.

Scorpion sting. I always remember that story. The scorpion and the frog.

You heard of that one? I'll tell you, because I like telling people. So, I should change it really, shouldn't I? But anyway, so I try and remember about some of the thieves around here. So I can be friends with people, but you've got to remember that they're, because of their habits and because of their dependency on stuff, and they lie, and they will kind of, you know, they're not to be trusted.

But once you remember that, you can kind of steer your way around it. And I was telling a neighbor this, because he was talking about how one of his neighbors robbed him and from, you know, went in and robbed some champagne from his fridge and, you know, whatever. Owes him money.

And I said, gave me an opportunity to tell the frog and the scorpion story. And I said to him, have you heard the frog and the scorpion? He said, can you just take a break? He said, he said to me, just calm down. Let your words just ease out slowly.

There's no hurry. I haven't got to be anywhere. I do have things to do, but just take your time, JJ.

I said, okay, have you heard of the scorpion and the frog or the frog and scorpion? He said, is it important which one's first? I said, I don't know. I'm not sure if it's actually the scorpion and the frog or the frog and the scorpion. But it's kind of like a parable, kind of parable.

I'm not sure if it's, if it's a Christian parable, or if it's a parable from a different religion. I do not know. He said, okay.

So do you want to tell me what it is? And I said, okay. Well, there's this frog. And he said, wait a minute, is it going to take long? I said, I thought you said you didn't have anywhere to go.

He wasn't. I never said I didn't have anywhere to go. Why do you assume that you're the only one with stuff to do? I said, I didn't say that.

He said, you say, oh, you got nothing else to do. You're going to not get where to go. I said, you told me you was not in a hurry.

There's a difference between being in a hurry and not having anywhere to go. I've got places to go. I'm just not in a hurry to get there.

A difference. All right. So what? Okay, I'll tell you the story.

It's there's a frog. Yeah, it's a frog. It's just about to cross this little river, this little lake, a little pond, whatever, just a little lake or whatever.

And just about to jump in. And he heard a voice behind him say, oi. He thought, what? He looked around and it was Morris.

Morris the scorpion. And he said, what do you want? He said, why are you being rude? You don't, we're just saying hello. He said, yeah, but you're always after something, ain't you? I said, no, I don't want anything.

Yeah, but you only speak to me when you want stuff. No, I just want to see how you are. See if you're okay.

You well, just why don't you just get to the point? What is it you want? I don't want anything. You owe me money, by the way. Morris scorpion.

Yeah, I know. Yeah, it's fine. I'll pay that back.

Of course. When? Never. Okay.

So what do you want? Don't want anything. Don't want anything. Just, just, you know, just, just, you know, chilling out for what to say.

Hi. Saw you at the, the edge of the, you know, the little edge of the stream and just, you know, for just wondering what you're up to. I'm just going over the other side.

Oh, okay. I was trapped. I was planning to go that way.

Oh, good. See you later. But you know what? Well, it's such a long way round and it take me like all day just to get around it because it's, there's a bridge, but it's a long way up there to get to the bridge and to climb over the bridge and to get the other side.

Then I got all the way back to, you know, this part of the stream. And he said, and the frog said to him, he said there's a river now. It's a stream.

And then he said it was a pond, which is it? And Morris the scorpion said, does it really matter? It's some water. It's a, it's, you know, it's about getting over the water. Does it matter what we call it? Do we actually have to give it a name? Does everything have to have a label? Like, yeah, but no, it's good to have context and good to have I mean, things have names for a reason.

He said, okay, all right. So the stream, so we just, you know, I want to get across the stream. And the frog said, that's good.

I'll see ya. And the scorpion said, wait a minute. What? said the frog.

What? And the scorpion said, can you give me a lift? He said, what do you mean give you a lift? He said, well, if I stand on your back and you just swim across the stream, and then you can just drop me off when we get to the other side. And the frog said, no. He said, why not? He said, you'll sting me.

It's what you do. You're a scorpion. You sting people.

You'd sting me. You stung me for money in the past. Guaranteed, you'll sting me.

If I get halfway across the river, you'll sting me. And a very wise thing, Morris, the scorpion said, ah, but Renoir, that's his name. Frog's name.

He said, Renoir, Rennie. What would be the point of that though? What would be the point of me? Is my forehead a bit dirty? That's weird. Maybe I just caught the sun.

I think this might be the light. Yeah, that's weird. I don't know.

And so yeah, he didn't. That wasn't the frog. Like Renoir said, what are you talking about? Your forehead being dirty? And the scorpion said, no, just don't worry about it.

What would be the point in me stinging you halfway down across the river or pond or stream? You know, the water. What would be the point? Because then you drown and I would drown. That would be no good for either of us, would it? And Renoir, the frog said, yeah, it makes sense, but you've always been a liar to me.

You know, I like to think, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. And, you know, everyone lies sometimes. I understand that.

No one's perfect. But you've lied so many times, making stuff up and then asking for money. It's almost like, oh, I've got this.

I mean, every single thing, there could be any kind of emotional little string you can pull. You do, you come around and then you ask for money at the end of it. I'm hungry.

You got any money? I just saw a blue car outside. You got any money? I mean, just random things. Lovely weather today, isn't it? Got any money? So the scorpion said, look, I can owe you some money.

I'll pay it back. So how much do I owe you? So I've been borrowing money off you for the last 10 years, solidly, never paid anything back. So five pound, would that do it? Would that cover it? I said that the frog said, and Renoir said, you know what? Keep your five pound.

That's just an insult. If you really, really don't know why, then there's something wrong with you. And the scorpion said, come on, don't be like that.

Gives a lift, please. Please take me over the side of the pond, freshwater stream, river thing. And the frog, he looked and he thought, well, it's only going to be a couple of minutes.

It doesn't take him long. He's got quite big legs. And also, like, it's not really an issue of the weight because he wants he wants to help the horse over there on his back.

And I've now got an image of a frog piggybacking a horse across a river. It's just weird, weird, weird. So anyway, move that one.

Eventually, Renee, Renee, Renoir said, Okay, fair enough. It makes sense. Why would you sting me? I know you stung me financially and lied to me for the last 10 years.

But why would you sting me when we're in the river? Because that would be. Yeah, that'd be detrimental to both of us. And Morris, the not penguin, scorpion said, exactly.

It would be pointless. This would be ridiculous. So he said, the frog said, Okay, fair enough.

Hop on. Well, they both laughed. He said, get on, get on and I'll group tightly though.

And I'll just swim across and I'll let you off the other side. He said, Are you sure? Be your best friend forever and ever and ever and ever and ever. And he said, Yeah, I'll do a payment plan.

I'll pay back all those thousands of pounds I owe you. And one pound a month. What do you think? Okay, we'll sort that out when we get the other side.

And halfway, well, they're caught way through. Fine. Halfway through.

The scorpion stings. The frog. And the frog looks up and says, What have you done that for? We're both going to peril now.

And a scorpion said, Why? Why would you do that? And he said, Because I'm a scorpion. That's what scorpions do. And you hear a bit of gargling and then the last thing you hear is the scorpion saying, You got any money? And that was it.

That was the end of that story. So I think, See, I'm, how did I get onto this subject? This is supposed to be about the newspapers, man. I can be friends or friendly with people that are, have completely different belief systems, different opinions.

I don't care about opinions and beliefs and stuff. I'm just me and I get on with anyone pretty much. I'm not a big fan of phonetics.

Generally, especially fitness phonetics, they're the worst. Healthy people. I, what else have I got? Even wrong ones, even people that are thieves and liars and stuff.

I'm okay with people like that. I get on with people. You just have to remember where you stand.

You have to remember kind of where you are with them. I think that's all it is. You know, you don't, you don't give your bank card to a thief.

You know, I got a neighbor that actually, she did this like three different times. So she didn't really learn. She gave, and I think it was three different people, maybe four different people or one person twice, same person.

And each time she was at home, she said, Oh, can you, can you go to the petrol station or to the whatever, draw some money out and get some drinks and get some stuff in the petrol station because I don't want to go out. So this person would go out, take her car. And then he would draw money out.

He draw, he drew out way more than she asked him to. He didn't fill up the car, which is supposed to fill up the car with petrol, but he didn't do that. But he used all the petrol by driving around doing other things and spent the card in think three or four different places.

And was gone, didn't come back. He didn't come back. And he did eventually.

And I think she still lent him the card again. But not lent it like can you go to can you go to the petrol station and get me and a different person. It didn't have they didn't have a car.

But they went off in their their own car. She got the card back, I think four days later. And they'd rinsed the card.

And it happened to think about four times different people. I think the same person a couple of times at least. It's just just got to learn you know, that's that's a scorpion they sting don't don't give anyone you don't give anyone your your bank card.

If you if they're that way inclined, blimey. There's only one person I've ever in fact, I think I might give my bank card to my friend downstairs once because I couldn't leave the flat. I've been a gastroenteritis.

I literally couldn't go outside. So I think I might given him my card to draw some money out. Yeah, I think so.

But I always know what was in there anyway, it's never be it's never a lot in there. So and I trusted him. And he used to trust me with his card.

But they trust his card like it was so many people said don't don't keep giving people your pin number. Because unlike me, other people remember pin numbers. I couldn't tell you what his pin number was.

Literally five minutes after I typed it in, I'd forgotten it. I had to write it on a piece of paper. And then I've chucked that piece of paper away.

Anyway, I know what it but I know some people can remember stuff like that, especially if it's free money. Yeah, okay, what other stuff is in low emissions, swift blasts, kick blade, swift, this is Taylor Swift blasts clickbait trial move. Sully Swift has issued a scathing response after she was subpoenaed, subpoenaed as a witness in Blake Lively and Justin Boldigos or whatever.

Do you know what I'm thinking? If you've got a little bit of money, and you're going to court, you could, I wonder if you could do that and just subpoena people. You know, just like say, well, I want Robin Williams, I want Robbie Williams, I want just name all the famous people that I want to be at my trial. Just so I get to meet some famous people.

So I'd like to call I'm trying to think of someone famous. I'm so out of touch with showbiz these days since I'd kind of, I left showbiz a while ago, you see. Oh, this is funny.

Okay, so after years of touching Dublin's famous Molly Malone statue, tourists have been ordered to stop. The bronze landmark has been an attraction for visitors who rub her cleavage for good luck. Is this her? Is this a picture? Is this funny? The tradition, the tradition with the statue being rubbed for up to 60 times an hour has left Molly tarnished.

The whole boobie area is kind of, it's a different colour to the rest of her. But there's something about statues that make people just want to get up close and personal. I don't think it's just a statue thing.

They did that with Buddhism, that whole, like big belly Buddhist rub the belly for luck. The Buddha was not, the Buddha, like, you know, the Buddha Buddha would, I'm pretty sure of being quite slim. Just bearing in mind where he was living, and how he lived.

The fact that he's, and also it's usually oriental as well, isn't it? The Buddha and the Buddha wasn't oriental. The Buddha was Indian. But it's very weird.

Not that that makes any difference. Look, teen belly fat links to brain development. Teenagers of excess belly fat could face problems with learning memory and emotion control.

I was skinny as anything. And I, and my brain development was ridiculous. So I don't think, and look at me now.

I'm probably, well, I am overweight. And I'm super, super intelligent. Oh, dear.

Stop having a go at young people. It seems in newspapers, we have a go at old people, now we're gonna have a go at young people. Old young people, they don't know what it's like.

Oh, the generation today. You realize, if you go back 20 years, every single time you go in the papers, there's people going on about the generation today. They did it during the Beatles, during Elvis, during Buddy Holly.

They did it during the Rolling Stones, the Sex Pistols. They did it during every single kind of period of young people. The young people today.

I mean, Elvis Presley got like, got arrested for wiggling his hips on stage. I mean, it's kind of weird. I find it all strange.

This, I think it's jealousy. I think people as they get older, they just get jealous of young people, because they're young, young and healthy, and can pretty much do what they want. They see a little wall, they can run, climb over the wall, jump over the wall, without having to spend three or four days planning it.

Like I do. I can't remember the last time I jumped over a railing. Used to do it all the time when I was in my 20s.

Now, I mean, no. I will walk a mile, if it takes it to go all the way around, rather than trying to get over a railing. Can't do it, won't do it, shan't do it.

But I don't dislike people that can't do it. Good for them. I mean, just because it's not like young people got all the benefits.

There's a lot of a lot of benefits for being older. There's, there's, there, um, there, um, there's, I'm sure there's lots of things, lots of benefits of being, you know, being older gives you, than compared to being young. And, oh yeah, there's, no, I can't think anything off of any, off the top of my head.

I can't think of anything. But I'm sure there's loads of things. If you're watching this on YouTube, give me a list of things that you think that you benefit from being old.

My home will survive. Oh, that's a thing. What's this? Weight loss jabs can boost mental health.

Okay. I'm not going to be, I wouldn't take the weight loss jab because I don't need to. Necessarily.

I mean, I'm not quite as in that category, but it sounds like an amazing thing for people that really need to lose weight really quickly, you know, for, because of serious health conditions. But I was told, I was listening to someone that was interviewed and they said about it and they said the basic just takes your appetite away. Anyway, Feeny just started barking so I had to take a little break.

Neighbour's dog was in the garden. What is the time? Anyone? Anyone got time? No way. It's two o'clock.

Well, 1.59. Sunday, the 11th of May. Wow. How strange.

How long have I been talking for then? See this, notice how there's two stories that are very similar. They kind of go together. Teen belly fat links to brain development.

So basically saying being overweight affects your intelligence. Okay. Or affects your brain.

And then this next article, a jab that loses weight, boosts mental health. So again, being slimmer is better for your brain. I don't know.

It seems a little bit, very kind of a bit indirected, a bit, a bit, a bit subtle. They want to do. I'm not going to read it.

And they were designed to help combat diabetes, but now also prescribed to help obese people lose weight. They slow digestion and reduce appetite by mimicking the hormones that regulate hunger and feelings of fullness. Cool.

Elton and Paul joined fate. So Elton John and Elton John forces will serve Elton John and Paul McCartney are urging the Prime Minister to protect music copyright from artificial intelligence ripoff. The thing is, right.

It's kind of like, why do they care at this point in their life? And maybe it's they're thinking about future, future music producers and artists. So perhaps that's the reason. But at this point, Paul McCartney is what? Nearly 90.

So he's it. Anything that comes out from AI is very likely to have been influenced by the Beatles being the most successful band in the world in the history of music. So Paul McCartney has had a massive influence already on music anyway, over still still does.

But over the last 50 years, 60 years, he's been influential. Elton John has been around for a long time, hasn't he? So his music is going to be huge influence. I just don't know why.

It's a weird one. It's weird. I suppose, if, if someone came and just did what I do, and it was AI, and it wasn't me.

And it was like, almost the same. Then that probably annoy me. I'd still continue doing what I do, because I don't think I can be mimicked or replicated.

But I'm, I might be wrong. And it's not really a case of whether I can or can't. It's why would anyone want to really.

And anyone that listens to me, would pretty sure watch me would want to see the real me because you want to see me get even older. That's the point, isn't it? I think it's, it's become a look, the food bank chief who fears running out of funding believes that Labour government. Okay, that's not a nice story.

I suppose the fact that it's got the word food bank, probably not usually positive stories there. Fraser star Kelsey Graham claims he has he has to knock down 185 year old English cottage because he's too tall for it. Really? That is I'm sorry, this has got to be a really ridiculous story.

The actor 70 and his wife 46 5666 24 years. That's not bad, is it? It's pretty good. Brought the gravestone property in Portishead, Somerset.

He plans to extend it. His plans to extend it were rejected, but he has now been given permission to replace it. He was accused of being a wealthy American destroying a treasured piece of heritage, and the raw nature of the area.

But Kelsey, who is now is more than six foot tall, said about us destroying people's lives. It is not a listed building. He added, it's had three or four different additions put on.

I think the ceiling height is about five foot 10 inches. I can't I can't stand up. I know it's hindsight, but maybe look at the building.

If you're going to buy somewhere to live, maybe look at it first visit it. And then you'd know that you can't fit inside. Why would you buy somewhere that you can't fit inside? What would be the point? Because basically, I understand if you're six foot seven, right? Seven foot tall.

And anywhere pretty much you move to, you're going to have to crouch to get through the doors. And you're going to be back, you might not be touching the ceiling, but you're going to going to, you know, in the UK, you're going to struggle to get through the doors. So you might not be able to find somewhere that already has a big door.

But you're going to want to once you get in, you're going to want to convert that door so that you can walk through without banging your head in there. I would. I mean, these doors, they could be completely taken out the frame taken out and made so it goes all the way up to the ceiling.

It'd be easy. I say easy, I wouldn't be able to do it. But there's a lot easy things I can't do.

Finding benefits of being old, loads of benefits. I mean, there's one obvious one. I say bingo, but I don't know, that's probably not necessarily just for older people.

Okay, just have a look anything else in here. Curry's Alan shows off his two leading ladies. So Coronation Street star.

This is daughter and his wife. Here is Coronation Street favourite, Alan Hallstall, with his two favourite ladies, his daughter, Sienna and his new girlfriend, Ellie. The star 42 who plays Korean mechanic, Tyrone Dobbs is dating Ellie Dolan, a human resources coordinator at the Moriarty Wortley Park Golf Club, Manchester, where Alan is a member.

Proud Alan. Why is he proud? What's he proud of? Is he? I don't know. Was he? He's saying proud Alan posted a picture of Ellie and Sienna on Friday night and included a heart in his caption.

Alan is really happy. Ellie is a great girl. They have lots in common.

And she gets on so well with Sienna. So I was concerned about that for a second to be fun. You know, I was a little bit distracted.

Like, but does she get on with his daughter? But apparently she does. For those listening, that was a sigh of relief. Oh, I'm so pleased.

That was that was honestly, that was really gonna just keep me worrying for days, but I'm glad now it's got in there. Why? Why? I don't know. How is that? How is that a newspaper article? I don't know.

Maybe I'm wrong. Lineker, I'd like to see Prem star who comes out as look at this. Lineker, I'd like to Prem star who comes out as gay.

Gary Lineker said he hopes a gay male footballer comes out at the top level and is applauded for their bravery. Okay. So it has happened.

Apparently England's only openly gay male pro footballer is Blackpool FC striker Jake Daniels. Now we had a famous footballer. I think he was ousted out to be fair.

Just in fashion. In was it the 90s or was it the 2000s? It's a long time ago, long, long time ago. And it did not end well.

They were not ready. They were not ready for that. And this is weird considering how much just just maybe I don't know.

It's just I don't really get it. I don't understand. I don't really understand where people have people have problems with other people's identities, really.

You know, it's like someone's just living their life, let them live their life. Is it affecting you or not? If it's not, then by the way, I was looking. There's a reflection in the TV of the tree and I think I'm looking over there because I've seen some birds in case you wonder why staring at all of this reader offer in partnership with yimbley.com. Sit, relax and rise with ease.

Now 459 pound 99. Really? Oh, no, it's a good one. It's not.

There's a reason why it's expensive. My nanny used to have my nanny Newland used to have one of these. And basically, it helps you stand up.

So because my name was really weird saying that is, I think it might actually be the same, the same chair that my nanny had. Yeah, it's weird. But yeah, I used to help her stand up.

So that's very, really good. Really good. It was 6 629 pound 99.

I reckon when she bought us it's probably a lot more than that, because I think they were quite new. And McFarlane's ex wife has splashed out on another house as she builds her property portfolio in the wake of her divorce from the TV star. That's good.

Lisa Armstrong, who is said to have received a 31 million settlement. 31 million. Okay, so what did she do to earn that? Well, why did she deserve 31 million pounds? The 48 year old makeup artist has just become the savvy property developer.

In 2020, two years after her split from aunt, following 11 years of marriage, and 20 years together, Lisa bought a 3.8 million house in West London. However, Lisa had less luck with a former marital home, a five bedroom West London mansion. Okay.

31 million. Okay. 31 million.

I mean, that's pretty good going for a TV presenter to have 62 million pound, because I'm guessing she got half. Wow. 31 million.

With 31 million pounds, you don't really need to do anything. You technically could probably live off the interest of that. I mean, 5% interest.

So 1 million to 31 million would be 5% interest. 1.31 1.5 million a year. It's probably enough to get by in it.

I mean, this thing is she's quite young, isn't she? 48, as we all know, 48 is very young. And do the portfolio. I mean, that's going to be she can turn out 31 million into 100 million or 200 million.

Good on her. 31. I need to marry a celebrity.

That's what I need to do. Need to marry a celebrity and then then take their money. Wow.

31 million. How did he not do a three and up? It's been it's been famous since he was a teenager, since he was in Byker Grove in the 90s. Byker Grove.

And then he was a TV show host on children's TV on Saturday morning. In the 90s as well, I do believe. Byker was Byker Grove in the early 90s, maybe.

So he's been famous for a long, long time. Why would he a prenup seems like a good thing to do, doesn't it? I could just see the conversation though. Prenup.

Well, you don't trust me. You obviously don't love me then if you're going to have a prenup. Okay.

So you just you just don't think that way. You don't believe in marriage, do you? Do you believe in prenups? I'd have a prenup. If I got married, I'd get a prenup.

I would. She'd have to have all my debt. She'd take all my debt.

That's it when I'm gone. When we leave. I'd have a prenup.

She'll have half my television. And what if I give her access to Vinnie? Hmm. Virgo, my star sign.

Should I read all the star signs just so we all know? It's all for sure. It's all true. Aries.

There's a full moon with a complex aspect on financial matters. So something involved in a changeover may be up for discussion for you or yours with paperwork or results around June 27. You or yours? And since when do we say June 27? June 27th.

With a th on? Strange that they would talk like that. June 27. No, it's not how we talk.

Taurus. Relationships are in the headlights of Monday's full moon as maybe something career or family linked that's been on your mind. Try not to overthink changes as what alters may suit you better.

Okay. Gemini. There may be a situation where you have to be firm but fair in order not to have to sacrifice too much.

Behind the themes, negotiations may be afoot. A concern settles in about 10 days. Cancer.

A full scorpion moon highlights what's happening in your closer emotional bonds. Perhaps bringing food for thought around long-term commitments of all sorts. There could be surprising announcements.

Leo. There could be signatures on key documentation linked to family or property as a time of restriction. Seems to be concluding.

There's a go-ahead that could spell travel for you or someone close. I'll do this in my normal voice now. My non-podcast voice.

Some deep thinking. This is Virgo. Some deep thinking, maybe even some overthinking is afoot as this week opens up yet by the weekend it looks as though there's a liberating breakthrough, a clearing of the way forward.

I didn't understand that. Some deep thinking, maybe even some overthinking is afoot as this week opens. All right, there was no, there was the, the diction's wrong, so it should be an apostrophe.

Yet. See, it's not just opens yet, it's opens yet. It's a pause.

You know, that's why we have the apostrophe. Yet by the weekend it looks as though there's a liberating breakthrough, clearing, a clearing of the way forward. Okay.

Libra. Financial affairs could feature in Monday's full moon when competitions are, or no, completions, sorry, are themes. Although Mercury reminds us of the importance of a fine tooth comb as he aspects the Pluto, the planetary rulers of the moon.

Scorpio. Your central stage of Monday's full moon. Marking a completion point for something you began or looking to get moving back at the start of November.

Now at last, wheels could start turning. Sagittarius. There could be a lot on your plate, maybe things to fix or situations where much is changing at work or with significant others.

The next couple of weeks should bring a settling phrase. Capricorn. This could be a turning point for you, maybe a moment of truth that you're reaching about aims and goals, thoughts about options for the future, maybe linked to family or possibly to putting down roots.

You've got Aquarius. A full moon suggests closure, thinking, speaking, then easing. Emotions are often stronger with more intensity around forward planning.

You may in the next fortnight make a decision about a commitment. And lastly, Pisces. There's a sense of release around this full moon for you, possibly connected to matters linked to travel, legalities or maybe to the world of information, education.

An settlement may be ahead. So that's another thing. Why put an settlement? We don't say that.

When we talk, we say a settlement. They made an settlement. Even if an is the correct way to actually form it in a sentence, it's not how we speak.

So when you speak out loud, it do not work. Yeah. So there.

That's all I'm saying. Oh, there's another one here. Slimming clubs are not going anywhere.

Oh, yeah, because the thing is, if that skinny drug thing that they do. Imagine that that ended all the millions and millions and millions of pounds and dollars, billions of dollars, in fact, around the world that get made from half promises from around, you know, when it comes to losing weight, especially at the end of the beginning of the year. People joining gyms, buying books.

Wow. All right. Just seeing if there's anything in the sports papers to do a boxing.

So that's the only thing I'm interested in. It's not about you, is it? Everything's about me. Blimey.

It's just like everything's about you. Everything is about us. It's just football, football, football, football, football.

My friend across the road, across the land, and he's a fanatic about football. I'm proper. And I've told him I'm not interested in football and I will not have a conversation with him about it.

Because he will talk for hours. He tries to catch me out. And the other day he was talking about.

What was he talking about? Something to do with, it was had to do with boxing. Oh, excuse me. It was to do with boxing.

And he found a way from boxing to link to football. Just a tiny little link. And then he just spread everything ahead was football from now on in the conversation.

Yet we started talking about it's come like, oh, the Fabio Wardley fight. Yes, you like Fabio Wardley? I said, yeah, I do. Yeah, I do.

So he's fighting in Ipswich. I said, yeah, it's a live in Ipswich. I'm big, I'm big Fabio Wardley fan, big, big, big fan of his.

He's my favourite heavyweight. And above the world champions, Fabio Wardley is my favourite heavyweight. That's unusual for me.

And I just think he's I think he's something else when it comes to as a fighter. And I can see something that I'm not sure that the boxing world has seen yet. There's something different about him that I don't see in any other heavyweight.

And probably since trying to think. And Evander Holyfield. If you look at someone that will just keep going.

And he literally puts everything into the fight. Everything. How many I mean, Chisora, Chisora is another one.

Because everything, every time, possibly Dillian White, possibly lots of heavyweights. But I'm just trying to think. Probably including the heavyweight, maybe every heavyweight, every heavyweight boxer, including all the world champions.

And he went from talking about Fabio Wardley, oh, he's going to have the fight at the Ipswich football club. I said, yeah, he's an Ipswich football fan. That was it, straight into football.

It's like he planned it. Anyway, I'm going to go. Thank you for listening.

Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. And be gentle with yourself because you do deserve to feel safe. Lots of love.

Bye. I'm just Finny. Finny started barking now.

Finny, Finny. I'm going to have some breakfast. Bye.