#42 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks

Hello and welcome to relaxation hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes.

Just to let you know, I've got six websites, uh, but the main one is jasonnewland.com and all of my recordings are on there. And I say that actually, I'm in the middle of uploading everything, so lots of stuff's on there, but probably by the end of the weekend everything will be on there. So, I just want to say thank you first for listening to this and thank you to those regular listeners, because over the last few months this podcast has actually become one of my most popular ones.

And I've got 45 podcasts varying from chronic pain courses to relaxation courses, sleep courses and ongoing podcasts like the Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis, Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcast, Sleep Hypnosis Weekly, and this one that's also ongoing. And so yeah, so I'd just like to thank you for your support. Now, I've been thinking about this.

I don't normally give a lot of thought to sessions before I make them, but I've been thinking about this podcast in a sense of what is useful, what is something that maybe I could have heard, or been advised, or been told, or something that I needed to hear but I didn't hear it, because there was no one around that I could ask for help from. Or at least that's what I felt.

At the time, although I did go to counselling yeah in 2004, but the real like the worst part of the panic attacks had calmed down by then.

So something that I may have said before is something that I really think is important to remember, if you can, maybe not remember, maybe try and believe. And you know, trust me when I say it, because it's true that the panic attacks, the anxiety attacks won't last. First of all, in the moment, during an actual panic attack, not only will it not last, it can't last.

Nothing can last, you know, no feeling can stay with you, you know, feelings have to change. It's just like you can't, if you eat a meal, you can't always feel full. Eventually, you know, you might have the biggest meal of your life and be sitting there and you feel like you have to undo your trousers because your belly is just bloated and you think, oh, I'm never gonna, I can't have no more food, I'm not gonna eat again for another year.

But four hours later, five hours later, you might be sitting there thinking, hmm, I need more turkey. You know, you might actually feel hungry again. Well, you will feel hungry again at some point.

So it's the same with people that get drunk and they wake up with a hangover and, or maybe they're laying over a toilet, throwing up and saying, I'm never doing this again, never gonna drink again. But maybe the week, you know, a week later, they're in the pub, in the bar, the nightclub, sitting at home, maybe drinking alcohol, because it didn't last, that feeling didn't last. And if the feeling did last, they wouldn't drink again.

They wouldn't be able to. So if the panic attack, the anxiety attack, if it lasted and just continued, we wouldn't be able to do anything else. But the same as if sleeping lasted and continued, we'd just spend our whole life asleep, we wouldn't be able to do anything.

In fact, we wouldn't be able to eat, because we'd be asleep, we wouldn't be able to go to the toilet. So it'd be a bit messy, really, wouldn't it? So nothing lasts, nothing. Just like panic attacks, feelings of anxiety and stress, they can't last.

It's a temporary feeling. And I think it's useful to hear it when you're not in the experience. Because during the experience, this might not go in.

It might. It might be really useful to actually get a little bit of groundedness, to introduce a bit of reality into this distorted frame of mind, which is what a panic attack is, it's what high anxiety is. It's a distortion.

It's not real, it's not real, generally. And I'll say generally, because sometimes high anxiety is real, and there's a real reason for having it. And if you live with someone that's being abusive, you've got a reason to be anxious.

If you're going to work and you've got a bully as a manager, there's a reason to be stressed and anxious about that. And that's something you need to change. You can change the way you think about it.

You can change the way you deal with it. So there's those few examples where actually it's a damn good reason to have those feelings of panic and anxiety. And I guess if you read any of the anxiety books, they'll talk about the fight or flight feeling, to have that same feeling of like a lion or a tiger chasing you.

And I don't think many people would want to have a fight with a tiger. Most people don't want to run away. But that feeling seems to get connected with the feeling of a panic attack.

Yet the difference is, in that situation, you'd be running away. And yeah, you'd feel a feeling, but it wouldn't be a panic attack. Because if you had a panic attack, chances are you wouldn't be able to do anything.

Because I think if I had a panic attack with a tiger there, I don't know if I'd be able to run away. I don't know if my brain would even function. Once there was a thing going on outside where I lived, like a violent episode going on.

So I went to phone the police on my mobile phone, which in England is 999. I couldn't even function. My brain didn't even function for me to press the right keys.

It's just three numbers that are the same, 999, because I was so panicky with what was going on. So going back to what I originally said, it will end the panic attack, the anxiety attack, the stressful feeling. It will end.

It will come to an end. It has to. There's no other choice.

So when you know that it's naturally going to reduce, that feeling's naturally going to start to subside, you can realise that when a feeling starts to subside, it means that that feeling isn't as powerful as perhaps we may have given it credit. You could even go so far as to say that how real is that feeling? It definitely feels real. Of course it does.

But what texture does it have, that feeling of anxiety? What is it? What colour is it? What does it feel like, like physically feel like? Can you touch it? Can you hold it in your hand? Can you wrap it up and give it to someone as a birthday present, which isn't, obviously, you wouldn't do that to someone you liked. Does it have a sound? Does it taste of anything?

Does it smell of anything? And that's kind of a no, I imagine, for most of those questions, which means it's not real. It triggers a feeling, a very unpleasant feeling.

But the actual thing that triggers that feeling is just thoughts. I say just thoughts, the fact is that thoughts are the most powerful things that we have. However, it's just thoughts and expectation.

And I've been talking a lot this week on my insomnia sleep hypnosis sessions about expectations. And when I do those recordings, I do sometimes think, oh, I need to remember that for when I do this podcast that I'm doing now. Because what we expect and what we really, really believe, I mean, really believe is so much more likely to happen.

So, if I think about getting on the bus on Monday, going into town, and I spend all weekend thinking about it and imagining getting on there and just feeling anxious and stressful and angry and, you know, maybe a bit too hot, maybe sweating, self-conscious, all those kind of things that are of no use, definitely not worth rehearsing in my mind. If I do that all weekends, think about that, there's much more chance that when I get on that bus on Monday, that I'm not going to have a pleasant journey.

And it's kind of obvious, really.

It's obvious, but at the same time, it's not. Because when you put it into really simple terms, like I just did, you'd think, of course, obviously, what you, if you expect something to happen and you keep thinking about it, then you're going to taint your own experience, which makes sense. Not to do that, but it makes sense that it would have that effect.

Just in the same way, if you're going to see a, going to a concert, to see your favourite pop band or your favourite singer, or maybe you're going to the opera or you're going, you're going to something that you, to see somebody that you've wanted to see for years and years and years, and you're so looking forward to it, the chance is, if you're having a great time, it's very high.

Very high chance that you're going to really enjoy yourself. Because you're expecting to.

There's probably not one part of you that thinks that it's going to be a bit rubbish, or maybe the singer won't sound quite as good as they do on the album, or maybe the singer won't come out on stage at the right time, or perhaps the journey, there'll be traffic jams. There's a good chance you won't even think about any of that stuff because the powerful emotion is the excitement of seeing whoever it is in concert.

That'll be the overriding emotion, because that's the strongest emotion has the power to override all others.

I think with, when it comes to emotions, I think maybe survival of the strongest could be a good term, because whatever emotion you have that is the strongest it will win in a tug of war between all the different emotions. That's why people, I say people, some people, they would rather die than be wrong. Some people are so important to them to be right, and they have their views and their beliefs, and they stick to that.

Their views and their beliefs are so important that nothing, including information which contradicts their beliefs, you know, facts, we could say, doesn't have a chance against how they feel. So it's kind of belief. Belief is the most important thing that we could ever have.

So when you believe that you're going to have a great time at that concert, you're going to have a great time at the concert. It's going to take a lot to affect your time It's going to take a lot to get in the way of you having fun.

But also there's the, and this is more psychological, some would call it psycho babble, but when you're in that frame of mind, when you really do believe you're going to be fine, and you really do believe that when you go out next time to a place that perhaps used to bring on a sense of fear or anxiety, stress, when you believe that from now on, when you go out to places like that, you're going to feel relaxed and calm.

You really believe that you're going to feel relaxed and calm. And you really believe that, you know what, I've had enough of this anxiety. Just, you can literally say, I've had enough of this bullshit.

Who's it helping? It's not helping you. It's not helping me. It's not helping your loved ones, not helping anybody.

Most importantly, it's not helping you. That's the most important thing. So if you actually believe and you say to yourself, that's it, no more.

Because you think about it, having this anxiety and this extreme stress, you could compare it to being in an abusive relationship where you're being controlled by another person. But in this case, it's this feeling. Being controlled so that you don't do the things that you used to do, that you used to enjoy, or even try new things that you may enjoy because of that fear of the anxiety or just the anxiety thinking about it.

And that painful feeling, that horrible sensation of stress and anxiety and the panic. And it is an awful thing to be putting yourself through. And I think that a majority of people at some point in their life, if they're living in an abusive relationship, they say, no more.

Regardless of what happens from now on, no more. I'm not going to allow this to happen anymore. I'm not going to allow this to happen to me anymore.

Not one more time. That's it. Taking that stand and saying, no more.

That's enough. It's enough of this. Pain.

It's enough of this harm. It's enough of this discomfort, this self limitations. It's enough of this anxiety.

It's enough of this stress. Enough of this panic. No more.

I'm not going to put up with it anymore. That's it. You're taking your control back of your own life.

Taking control back of your own mind. No more. And I wonder what that feels like if you say that to yourself.

No more. No more feeling like a victim. A victim of your own mind.

Why would you do that to yourself? Why would you allow yourself to do that to yourself? No more. I'm being ever so forceful today, aren't I? Have you noticed that? No more. But definite.

Not, no more. No more. No more.

I'm talking serious. Cut the bullshit. Serious.

I like to mess around and joke around and do silly things. But you know what? Sometimes you need to be deadly serious. Really, really serious.

And you need to say no. No more. That's enough.

And it's not even a case of, I won't tell you again. Because if you do it in the right tone of voice, you don't need to ever say it again. No more.

This is your mind. You're not a slave to your mind. You're not a victim of your mind.

None of us are. It feels like it sometimes. Until you say no more.

That's it. I'm not going to put up with this anymore. And you start to realise and remember that what you think about affects how you feel.

What you think about affects how you feel. Not just in a small way, but in every way. Your thoughts are your life.

I mean, an extreme example of that would be, it's a really famous book called Man's Search for Meaning. And it's about someone that was in a concentration camp during the war. And he used his thoughts to get through the horrors that he dealt with, that he had to deal with.

He used his mind, his imagination. And he believed that he was going to get through it. He believed that he was going to have a good life afterwards.

Which he did. But he had to work on his brain. He had to have those thoughts.

Not just wait for them to occur. If you just wait for a thought to occur, it may never come. And it might come when you're not ready for it.

You might not notice it, because you might be in the middle of the conversation. It's not a case of waiting for a positive thought to arise. And when I say positive, I'm not talking about trying to motivate yourself to be the best, I don't know, mountaineer that you can be, or to be really good at golf, and you can improve your golf strokes, and the handicap, whatever, for golf, and all any of that stuff.

I'm talking about positive as in the opposite to negative. The opposite to negative. Because every time you visualize in your mind a situation that hasn't arisen yet, you're telling your unconscious mind that that's what you want.

You don't realize you're doing that, but that's what you're doing. And you don't consciously mean to do that, because that's not your intention. But your unconscious mind has that image, takes it in, absorbs it, and what you present to it, your unconscious mind gives you, tries to give you what you want, what it thinks you want.

So, if you imagine feeling anxious on the bus on Monday, and the more you do it, the stronger that request becomes, the stronger your unconscious mind will work to give you what your unconscious, what it thinks you want. So, if you think of it that way, you start to think consciously, what do you want? Not what you don't want, because if you think about what you don't want, then your unconscious mind is going to try and give you that, because it doesn't understand the difference between negative and positive.

It just listens to you, listens to what you say to yourself, it listens, it sees the images that you have in your mind, always watching, always listening, trying to give you what you want, because your unconscious mind, like every other part of your body, loves you, it's part of you, wants the best for you.

So, there's nothing against you, it just doesn't realize that it's giving you what you don't want, because that's what you've been thinking about. And, of course, that isn't necessarily the only reason why someone might have had the first anxiety attack. Mine very much, I think, was caused by the, I've talked about it before, it was a very stressful week, probably one of the most stressful working weeks I've ever had.

I was drinking excessive coffee, not eating healthily, drinking every night alcohol, and I was doing loads of hours, and I'd been doing loads of hours building up to that week, and then just something snapped, and I had my, like a big, big panic attack. Didn't know what it was, but once it happened, I started, I kept thinking about it, that's all I thought about, constantly, because I was so worried that it was going to happen again.

So, me thinking about it, what was my unconscious mind doing? It was observing, it was learning, it was basically taking my instructions, which was to have another panic attack.

And to connect certain things with anxiety and stress, when those things don't need to be connected to anything. But I didn't know that at the time. I didn't realise that at the time.

But now I do. It changes things, because now we've all got imagination, we can all imagine situations in the future. So, the first thing is to not dwell on unhappy events from the past, simply because by thinking about that stuff, your unconscious mind is watching and thinking, oh, you want more of that then, do you? Okay then.

Think of it like a dog, a dog, like a magic, wish-fulfilling dog. The dog would do anything, if anyone's ever had a dog, your dog, all it wants is for you to love him or her, and it would want to do anything, everything to keep you happy. A dog would give you anything, if it could.

Think about the unconscious mind a little bit like that. It doesn't know, it doesn't care if it's right or it's wrong. And with a dog, you can treat it any way you want, and it will still come back to you and still love you.

The same with the unconscious mind, doesn't have that, doesn't understand the difference between negative behaviour and positive behaviour. Also, the more positive thoughts towards the future you have, the less time and space you have for thinking about the past, because, I don't know about you, but I think the past is boring. The past is gone, who cares about the past? Generally, I know there's important events that has happened to all of us, but is thinking about it helping you in any way?

And maybe there is something that you, it's important, and you want to think about it.

So, perhaps you can set some time once a week, Sunday afternoon, for half an hour or something, where you can just be on your own, and you can look at some pictures and just, you know, give some time to that memory. If that's important enough for you to want to do that. So, you can start thinking about the future, not just like the distant future, where you, you know, where you want to be in 10 years time or a year's time, but the immediate future, even what you're going to do in an hour's time, what you're going to do when it comes to going to sleep.

You know, imagine just laying down on your bed, body gets relaxed, just naturally becomes relaxed, your head touches a pillow, and your mind just slows down naturally. And instead of trying to go to sleep, which never works for anyone ever, you can't try, you can't force yourself to feel tired, you can't force yourself to feel relaxed. Can't be forced.

It has to happen naturally. But we also have to welcome it and open, you know, open the door so that it can come in. Welcome that sense of relaxation.

So, you can think about the future, think about that bus journey that you're going to have, maybe tomorrow, that journey on the train, maybe that party that you've been invited to, and imagine feeling completely relaxed. Imagine feeling pleasure. Do you remember that? Remember that thing, pleasure? Physical, emotional pleasure.

When I talk about this with the sleeping sessions, instead of lying in bed thinking, I want to go to sleep, I've got to get to sleep, I've got to wake up at this time in the morning, instead of that stuff, how about just lay there and appreciate how nice it feels to lay down and to feel comfortable. It feels nice. It's actually a pleasant feeling.

It's pleasure. And there's different types of pleasure, of course. So, maybe you can start thinking about future situations in the near future that are going to be occurring, which some of which maybe you don't feel that you can avoid.

Maybe some that you will be avoiding, I don't know. Maybe some that you were going to avoid, but now, as you think differently about your situation and realize that something's changed in your mind since listening to this, then you think, oh, maybe this will happen instead. Maybe I'll just feel calm.

Maybe I'll actually enjoy this event. Maybe you can enjoy those changes that have taken place within your mind, within your body. I mean, it's a whole body-mind experience.

Realizing that your body can give you many different experiences. So, perhaps think about more of those experiences that you would like to have. Remembering that at all times, your unconscious mind is listening, watching, observing, taking notes, thinking that that's what you want more of.

So, in a sense, if you live with a small child, especially at that vulnerable age where they're copying everything you say, although it's funny to hear a small child swear, you know, it's also something that most adults, parents who kind of try not to do in front of them. So, we're careful what we say in front of the child. We're careful not to say something that might worry them.

So, perhaps we can start treating our unconscious mind the same way. So, when you're awake, and you're talking either to yourself or to another person, remember there's that unconscious mind is listening. And what you say about yourself, even though you may be saying it as a joke, just be aware of what you're saying.

For years, I've been telling people that I'm rubbish at maths, and I believe it. I 100% believe it. And it might not be true.

You know, I've got a degree, not in maths, obviously, but I've got a, there's a chance that I might actually be able to do mathematics and be fairly okay with it. I don't care enough to test that theory. But there are other things, I do wonder, what other things do I tell myself or tell other people? And, you know, those limiting things that affect my life in a negative way?

And what things do you say that affect your life in a positive way? So, I'll leave you with these thoughts.

I'll leave you with these ideas that I've given. And it's, I'm just going to stand up because my stretch my legs. And these words, it's really important.

And it's, um, I think this is probably the best sentence ever. It's not my sentence. It's the best sentence ever.

We become what we think about. We become what we think about. And this goes back way before, not way before hypnosis, but, you know, there's lots of different philosophy, people, religious, all kinds of people over the last, you know, thousands of years have said the same thing, maybe worded it differently, but said the same thing.

And it's true. It's the truest thing. We become what we think about.

So I'll leave you with that. And I will say thank you for listening. And please let me know if you like what I do.

The maybe you can like the podcast as well. And share it as well. If you if you if you're on a Facebook forum, group, whatever, for anxiety, anxiety, stress, stuff like that.

And if you do like what I do, then maybe share it with people that may also benefit. Thank you very much. And I shall speak to you very, very soon.

Bye.