#108 Relax & Sleep Hypnosis Daily - OPENING YOURSELF UP TO STRESS (Jason Newland)

Hello, welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is Relax and Sleep Hypnosis Daily. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

I hope you're well. And just to let you know, I am in the middle of creating a project. I forget the name of the page.

Let me give me a sec. Patreon, Patreon, a Patreon page. And I normally wear my glasses.

So I can't actually see where I am. But the light is shining. I don't know if you can see.

The light shines proper. Unless I kind of go like that, or like that. So I do this without my glasses.

I'm going to rely on my words, on my words. There is the sound of the rain against the window. Pain.

I find it quite soothing, generally. Quite relaxing. I think we might be having thunder coming.

So if it starts to thunder. I will continue. But I'll put a little notice in the title.

Contains some heavenly farts. So you know, heavenly farts. So I'd like you to get yourself comfortable lying down on your bed, a flat surface.

Or sitting in a comfortable chair. Just get in touch with how you feel. How you feel right now, in this moment.

How you feeling in your body? How you feeling in your mind? Do you feel calm? Do you feel tense? Maybe you feel stressed? Maybe you've got some anxiety? That might be the reason you're listening to this, or watching this video. Because this is also available on YouTube, as well as on my podcast. As well as on my website, as well.

The recordings, I do three different versions of the recording. Just the original recording, without music. One which is two hours long with music.

One which is five hours long with music. I won't be uploading any ones with music onto my YouTube channel. Because even though the music is copyright open source, as long as you post the copyright information, YouTube don't seem to recognize that.

So it's no point. They'll just take it off, or give me a slapped bum for doing it. So I'm not gonna bother.

I'll just put just one version. If you want to listen to this with music in the background, then maybe go to my website. Or check out the podcast.

I'm everywhere. I'm all over the place. All over the place.

Spotify, iTunes, pretty much wherever you listen to your podcasts. Just put in relax and sleep hypnosis daily. Or just put my name in, Jason Newland, and you'll find me.

Easy to find. Hard to forget. Maybe hard to find, easy to forget.

Sometimes you don't actually have to do anything to relax. You don't have to do anything. It really can be as simple as just sitting down, or lying down, and doing nothing.

Nothing at all. Just being. Just breathing, and not even in any kind of special way.

Just being alive. Just being there. Noticing how you feel.

Not trying to feel relaxed. So you're not sort of grabbing hold of that feeling, and really, you know, craving it. And you're not running away, or trying to avoid those feelings of tension, discomfort.

And that can be quite hard. Because as humans, our natural way of being is to move towards pleasure, and to move away from pain. Which is completely understandable, and makes sense, really, doesn't it? Especially physical, you know, a small child, they touch a hot stove, and they move their hand away very quickly.

Which is a good thing. It's, you know, it's how we survive in life. By learning to move away, and to maybe avoid danger.

However, when it comes to our internal workings, as far as emotions go, it doesn't quite seem to work the same way. Because life is continuously throwing stuff at us. We're being bombarded, really, with negativity a lot of the time.

Whether it's the news on the internet, people, you know, just talking about their problems. Or ourselves thinking about our problems, and focusing on the negative stuff, and worrying about all kinds of things. Again, that's natural.

So this isn't a space to start, like, having a go at yourself, and I'm not going to be starting, like, saying, oh, you should be different, and you should do things different, and you shouldn't. Basically, that would be like me saying, you shouldn't be a human being. Because worrying, and focusing on negative things, and trying to avoid suffering, and wanting to try and cling on to feeling good is natural.

But it's not necessarily the best way to do it. Because sometimes, the easiest way to actually let go of stress, and discomfort, anxiety, emotional pain is to just allow it to be there. To stop pushing it away.

It's almost like when we're pushing it away, we are feeding it, we are giving it energy. It gets an opportunity to actually get some kind of energy, and strength behind. So you're pushing, it's pushing, you know, and it causes more and more stress within us when we try to push stress away.

But when you just allow it to be there, you just accept that it's there, there is tension. When you realize that it's not going to kill you, it can't hurt you, because it is you. When you try and push it away, it almost becomes something separate.

Something, it's something against you. Once you realize it is you, you can't be against yourself, because there's no logic in that, there's no, that's really quite a living possible. It doesn't mean you're necessarily on your own side, but you can become, you can get to that point where you are more in touch with how you feel.

And that can start or continue just by allowing those feelings to be there. Don't push them away. That doesn't mean that you're going to be able to do it all day, every day.

But for maybe half an hour, each day, you can just sit down or lie down. Just get in touch with the feelings. Open all the windows, all the doors, let everything come and go as it pleases.

All emotions, all feelings, all worries, concerns, all pleasures, everything, just let it all come. Then go, then more comes, just like clouds in the sky, just floating by. You start to realize that actually, it's not that powerful.

These feelings that in our mind were like really, almost superhuman, so really, really powerful as if they had control over us. You start to realize that they don't, they really don't. And it's not that we have to have control over them either.

There are ways to do that. I quite like the idea of, I'm very lazy, I'm a very lazy person, you know, I like things to be done properly. But I like to take the easy, gentle route.

I'm not into, you know, when people go to the gym and say no, no pain, no gain, I just say no pain, no gain. No pain, thanks. I'm not into pain.

And with stress and anxiety, that's suffering enough to not add more on top. You know, I don't want the solution or the cure or the reduction of anxiety to come via having more. I don't want to go through pain to get to pleasure.

I don't want to go through pain to get to relief. I'd rather just allow it to happen organically. But it's not just going to happen on its own.

It requires you and me to just open our minds to the possibility that by almost welcoming these feelings into us, instead of trying to push them away, barricading the house, you know, it almost reminds me of like a zombie, The Walking Dead or a zombie film where all these zombies are trying to get into the cabin and they're, you know, trying to block the windows and the doors.

And it's a point, you know, it's, I mean, they're going to do it because they're not just going to leave the doors. But in the end, the zombies always get through, they always get in.

But in this case, that stuff outside the cabin can't hurt you. It hurts you more when it's outside of the cabin than when it's inside of the cabin. So when you're pushing it away, you can't see it.

It's like a small child of the monster in the dark. But there's no monster there. But because the child can't see, it's scared because the child can't see that there's no monster there.

Once a child sees, they're less scared. It's like, oh, there's nothing there. And it changes things.

So when you allow those feelings just to come in, you get to see them. So they're not this big, scary, roaring thing that you're at all costs trying to avoid having contact with. Because you're already feeling the pain from it.

You already got the anxiety and the tension and the illness possibly connected with that. That's out there, that's trying to get, it feels like a monster trying to get to you almost sometimes. It can.

The worry. But then you just let it in. But you're consciously aware of it.

It's not just, you're not oblivious to it. You're just allowing all those feelings just to come in. And all you do is just observe.

The first thing you notice is they're not scary. They're not monsters, they're not. And they can't hurt you either.

The reason they're not monsters, and the reason they're not really scary, and the reason they can't hurt you is because they are you. They're part of you. Just like your feet aren't scary and they can't hurt you.

Your hands, your nipples, your knees, it's part of you. I mean, some parts of us might look a bit scary, my face, for example, but it's not, it's just a part of you. And these feelings, these emotions that are just there, just there like, you know, stars at night in the sky, they're just there.

Not really doing much. And you realize that all those feelings actually wanted, all those feelings craved, was entry. That was it, just wanted to be allowed in.

Wanted to be, I guess, acknowledgement from you. Didn't want to be outcasts, didn't want to feel like they were separate from you. So you welcome them in.

Come in. Come in stress, come in worry about the past, come in regret, come in all these different things. Worries for the future, come in anger, come in all these different emotions, just let them in.

They can't hurt you. Because if they could hurt you, they would have done already. If our emotions could actually destroy us, which I think is, or stress, if stress could destroy you, it already would have done.

It can't really harm us. Because it's just a feeling. Our reaction to those feelings is where the harm is.

So when you just allow these feelings in, allow them to flutter around and wander in and maybe wander out, realizing that actually what they thought was behind the door is kind of the similar to us. What we thought was behind the door. We thought something perhaps really scary was there, something very harmful to us.

And when they come in, we open the doors, we allow these feelings just to be there. We allow ourselves to just accept that the emotions are there, the feelings are there. Anxiety, stress, it's just there.

It unburdens you, it reduces the anxiety and the stress that you had. You feel more relaxed. Because you realize that they can't harm you.

They don't have the power, they don't have any power at all. Just the feeling. Feelings become stronger when you refuse to acknowledge them.

As soon as you acknowledge them, as soon as you allow them, or more welcome them, in a way that's like kryptonite to superman. Whatever power they thought they had. You imagine lots of little supermen running in, or maybe a super villain that had superpowers and they're running in through the door.

I'm going to do this, I'm going to zap you with my eye lasers and I'm going to, and they're trying to fly and they just keep falling on the floor because they've got no powers. They're just banging into each other. Always funny to watch.

Because whatever energy they had before has been zapped from them as soon as they entered your space. See the only energy, the only strength, and they do get stronger, the more you push them away. It's almost kind of that impending doom of that anxiety getting stronger and stronger and the stress and you can feel it even though it's not, it's maybe the other side of the door, you can feel it and it affects us and it makes us ill.

But when that door's open, you see them just falling in on the floor with no strength, no power at all, no way to control us. In fact they don't, they almost just seem to just shrink. Not our doing, it just happens naturally.

So we don't have to do anything. That's why I like this because, as I said, I'm very lazy. I like the easiest route possible.

So to be able to just, you know, sit here or lie down on a bed and do nothing and just observe the feelings, the stress, the anxiety, the thoughts, the worries, the regrets from the past, the concerns for the future, the memories of conflict, of bad things maybe that have happened and things that we can never change. We don't need to change them. We don't need to do anything that happened.

And that unresolved stuff just comes in and we would have thought it would have so much strength, so much power, that it could harm us, that it could cause us to re-experience old memories and feelings and that we would crumble. When in fact what happens when you welcome those feelings in, as soon as they enter and get close to you, they're the ones that crumble. It's an old emotion.

I mean in reality expecting an old feeling from years and years ago, an emotion that we've been pushing away, it has strength because we're pushing it away. But in a way, in reality, to expect that to walk through the door and have the strength it had 20 years ago, the ability that it had, our reaction would be the same. That's like expecting the tough kid from school.

When you were 14 years old, there was always at least one really tough kid, usually gone through puberty at the age of nine and he's a giant, he's got muscles and people are scared of him and stuff like that. He might be the school bully, he might be nice, he might be an athlete, but if he was to walk through the door now 35 years after leaving school, he's not going to be the same person.

First of all, he's not going to be hugely bigger than you the way he was.

He might still be big and strong, but he's not going to be anything in comparison to what he was. And he might be an old man with a walking stick. But whatever strength he had out there, when he gets in here, nothing.

In fact the reality, there was no strength out there either, because that was just our perception, that was our expectation. As we all know really, if you expect something, there's a stronger chance that you would experience it. So when you open the door, open the windows, open your heart, open your mind to having and welcoming even any emotions, stress, anxiety, tension, allow it all.

Physical pain even, however weird it may seem, chronic pain, just allow it all just to enter. Anything that you're pushing away and notice how one by one they just crumble. Literally they walk through, it's almost like they're little vampires, you know, oh I'm gonna bite your neck, and then suddenly they just realize there's a window and a light shining on them and they just go and just sizzle like a sausage.

So that perceived danger, and I think danger is not really an excessive word, it feels dangerous doesn't it? Before, you know, when you imagined how you felt about even the idea of allowing the tension and the stress and those feelings that you would categorize as being horrible, to actually not just allow them to enter your space, but almost to welcome them. Like, come on man, come on, come on in.

And the more you see and experience those feelings just collapsing, crumbling, you then start to expect that yourself, because that's what you're expecting, because that's what you've seen.

Whether you expect it or not, that's what's going to happen. But that expectation changes your mind instantly. Changes your mind, it's almost like I put my fingers into your brain and just change something very, it's a tiny little change that transforms the way you think.

It can almost seem magical in a way, you know, like when someone's got a phobia of flying or something, and or, you know, wherever it could be spiders, I used to be petrified of spiders. I learnt phobia, by the way, I learnt it from someone else. And one day, I'm not sure what I did, but I didn't care anymore.

Did not care. I can sleep with a spider in the room, in the corner. Don't care.

It's just zero, it's like literally zero interest. And it can almost seem magical when something that you used to believe in, in your life, changes, like, just changes or ding. I mean, you might have a musical skull, I don't know.

But you know, just it changes. You feel different. And that way of changing, it happens all the time in life.

Happens all the time. If you bet someone, and they're rude to you, the first time now, let's say your son or daughter brings, you know, you have a dinner. And they invite you around to their to his girlfriend's house, or his boyfriend's house, whatever.

And the father's there, and the father's really rude to you. You're gonna think what an arsehole. Just natural, like, horrible, horrible man.

Don't want to see him again. Horrible. You might even think, oh, what if the, what if the son is like him? What if he's going to end up like him? And you stop me start worrying about your daughter, or your boy, whoever, in that scenario.

So you've got that, and it's fixed. It's in your mind. That's it.

He's, he's a horrible man. Don't like him. Don't want to see him again.

And you might have all these emotions about him. And you know, and that's a fixed perspective. That's it.

And you know, that pretty much nothing could change that. Even if he was nice to you next time. It'd take a lot of being nice to you to justify how he was.

Because in your mind, he's, he's an idiot. He's horrible. Don't like him.

He's nasty. Now, if you find out, it might not be for like three, four months, you find out that on that day, he just got back from the hospital and been told that he had prostate cancer. And, you know, and for the last four months, he's been going through treatment.

But you didn't know about it, because you weren't told. No one told you. It's personal stuff.

You know, you're not that close. You know, your son and your daughter or whatever has only been dating for a few months. You didn't find out that stuff.

As soon as you hear that, that that miserable old git, that was rude to you like four months ago, you find out that that day before the exact day that you went around in the evening, he just come back from the hospital to be told that he had a serious illness. And he came back to a house full of people, maybe, or came back to being told, yeah, we're having visitors.

He had no space to himself to be able to even absorb, or to contemplate or to think about the situation.

And hence, he was not in his right space. He was acting differently to how perhaps he would normally act. I can't imagine many people would be hugely entertaining in that situation.

But imagine you hear that information, you hear it. What happens to you? What happens to your opinion, to your, and it was a very solid, it was very, pretty much unmovable opinion towards that man. He's an arsehole.

Don't like him. Horrible. Don't want to see him again.

Suddenly, bang! Changed. Bing! It's almost like someone's put their fingers into your brain. Changed the switch.

Just turned the switch off. And not only do you not feel hostility towards them, because that hostility may have grown, because you may have been invited around. And every time, you know, your child is getting closer to this lady or man.

And you knew that in the future, or family occasions, you're going to have to see this horrible man that you don't like. And maybe you're planning for the future to feel miserable. In those situations, it's a human way of doing things, isn't it? Let's plan some misery.

Instantly, you hear the reality of why he was how he was. And click, your brain changes, not only to no longer feel hostility towards him. But the compassion that you feel instantly, almost like love arises towards that person that a minute ago, you didn't like, didn't even want to hear his name, maybe.

I mean, he might be really rude, you know, might have been a horrible, horrible evening. Instantly. Compassion, love, kindness, all different kinds of feelings changed your perception, changed how you felt instantly.

And that's, I think, what happens when it comes to anxiety and stress, when you realize that the only power I had was the power that you were given it by trying to push it away. And logically, why would you not try and push it away? It's the obvious thing to do. So there's no judgment here.

I spent years doing it. Still do do it sometimes. Until I remember.

Bring it on, baby. Come on, come in. There's nothing there.

The feelings change instantly. Where's it gone? And it has just gone. There's nothing there.

And again, click, your brain changes. And you realize that it's going to be very hard to go back to how you were. Because once you know, I mean, I know I like to go extreme.

But once you know there's a crocodile in your bathtub, you can't unknow it. You're not going to accidentally get in there and have a little bath. Oh, crocodile.

I forgot about that. No. If you're me, I mean, you know, I probably try and seek help with that.

I just wouldn't leave it in there. But even if it's a tiny little one, a little tiny little alligator, the size of your hand, or still do damage, couldn't it? So once you know, you can't forget, it's there. And once your brain changes, it changes instant.

So it's very hard to go back to that type of thinking of trying to push stuff away. When you realize now that first of all, there is nothing really to push away. And if you allow yourself to just experience the moment, experience whatever feelings, allow them in.

Keep an open door, keep all the windows open. In fact, just knock the damn walls down. You know, metaphorically, just let them come and go.

Let them come and go. And they get what they want. They just want your acknowledgement, your attention.

And they just dissolve, they crumble. They don't have any power over you or me. Just feelings, just emotions.

Then you feel more relaxed. And it can be surprising how easy you can go from the way you feel calm and loose in your body and in your mind. It may actually surprise you just how simple you can go from the way that you used to feel to how you feel now.

How your mind is slowed down. It has, hasn't it? Your mind is slowed down. Your body feels more relaxed.

Yeah? I know it has. I can feel it. I can feel the force or lack of force.

I can feel the gentleness. Just being here. Just being aware.

Not clinging onto anything. Not pushing anything away. Not avoiding, not hiding.

Just saying, hey. Anyway, it's hard for me to hide the size I am. No matter where I went, my big fat belly would be seen.

You see it from space, apparently. Yeah. Thank you, Mr. Astronaut.

Thank you for your Twitter comment. Even your breathing feels nice. Do you know what I mean? It's just, it feels calm.

Very calm. And you know this, this pleasure to be had when you feel relaxed. And that's something I think that's often ignored by some people who, you know, do kind of what I'm doing.

It's actually feeling relaxed is among the most pleasurable experiences you can have. I was going to say on your own. But it feels really nice.

It's pleasurable. It's not, it's, it's not about moving away from pain. Actually, it's almost, you're embracing the natural pleasure that's there.

Our natural state is comfort. Relaxation. Of course, when you're running for a bus, you're not going to be relaxed, probably.

Or if you're running around and rushing around and, you know, playing sports or those sports can be relaxing. But you know, you could be thinking and stuff. But when you're sitting down in a chair, lying down on your bed, this is a great opportunity to actually embrace the pleasure that you feel.

And it really is pleasurable. It's a really nice feeling. Really, it's calming.

It's lovely. And I think that's sometimes overlooked, maybe undervalued. Because I don't know about you, but I like feeling pleasure.

As your mind slows down, when you focus on your brain, like physically, I'm focusing on my brain. You know, of course, I can't actually access it directly, physically. But I can get a sense of my brain and it feels nice.

It's not far. If you tap your scalp, you are sending vibrations through your brain. You know, it's not a big distance between your top of your head and the beginning of your brain.

Of course, there's no nerve, no feeling inside the brain itself, no physical feeling. There's no nerve endings in there. But you can, I get a sense of being able to feel the brain.

And it feels really nice. It's really, because even though there may not be any nerve endings in the actual brain itself, all of our physical sensations come from the brain. It's kind of some weird, almost, doesn't almost make sense in a way, but it feels nice.

Just breathing, not controlling your breath, just breathing naturally. And the breathing does naturally slow down. And that cool air that you breathe in, it's pleasurable.

Your hands relaxed and loose. Your feet also loose and relaxed. Your legs, your arms, your chest, your stomach.

I mean, maybe you've not even taken any notice of any parts of your body for maybe most of the duration of this recording. Because you've been focusing on the words and the meanings and how it, how it affects you and your experience in this moment. And those changes that have been caused by you opening your mind and allowing those changes to occur, which then leaves you with a feeling of, well you can have a feeling of accomplishment.

That sounds like a good idea. A feeling of actually, you've done something pretty amazing for yourself. You've proven to yourself that there's so much more to you than maybe you realized.

You've proven that you can relax, maybe more than you realized. You've proven to yourself that you can let go of things that maybe you didn't even want to let go of. But now perhaps some of those things don't really seem as important as they once did.

Because once you, not just realize, but you know that outside things don't really have the power to affect you unless you decide to let them. And by just sitting for half an hour, one hour a day or maybe just 10 minutes and just allowing whatever feelings there are to just come and go as they please. And you can watch those negative emotions, thoughts and feelings crumble to the floor.

Because they don't have any, they don't have any power. You're no longer feeding them that power to function. You've turned off that switch in your brain, in your mind that was feeding them that power.

And now just like any electrical circuit, if you cut the circuit, disconnect at any point in an electrical circuit, the whole thing stops. And they just crumble, crumble to the floor. And it's that sense of peace that you experience within you, that you may actually be surprised by.

A sense of lightness, physically and emotionally. And you feel pleasure, you feel relaxed and calm, you feel good. And maybe the feelings of confidence within you has really grown.

Your confidence in you, in your own ability to accomplish what you choose to do in your life and to have more belief in yourself and your abilities. Maybe you can feel love towards yourself, feel it, really feel it within. And the reason you can love yourself is because you deserve to feel that love.

You can embrace it, because you deserve to embrace it, you deserve to feel wonderful. Wonderful. Which brings me to the end of this recording.

So as I always say quite often, remember to be kind to yourself. Because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love.

Bye.