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Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. Welcome to this podcast.
Relax and sleep hypnosis daily. Now, I want to point out that this is a little bit different from what I normally do. OK, so the first part is going to be focused on some of those thoughts, some of those things that may be getting in the way of you relaxing or going to sleep.
I only listen when you can safely close your eyes. So over the years I've been doing this a long bloody time. 15, 16 years or ever I've been making podcasts and relaxation and sleep hypnosis or sleep recordings, whatever you want to call them.
Some would say there's no such thing as sleep hypnosis. You can't be hypnotized if you're asleep. Oh, you know, whatever.
Doesn't matter. All I know is that I've sent thousands and thousands of people to sleep doing what I would call hypnosis. So whatever, whatever.
So basically what I've been told many, many times, one of the biggest issues that some people have or obstacles that some people have to letting go and relaxing or letting go, relaxing and falling asleep is an overactive mind or thinking about stuff that you don't want to think about. Now, it sounds illogical but at the same time we know it happens. I've done it.
You've done it. Everybody's done it. You know, it's like farting.
We've all done it. We don't necessarily talk about it in public but we've all done it. Everybody.
We've all sat in, you know, relaxed, tried to relax and maybe haven't been able to because we can't stop getting that thing, that thought, that worry, that concern out of our head or gone to bed to go to sleep and all this crap's going around in our head. Things, stuff that's happened in the past, maybe a memory, images, all that stuff that may really not be very useful when it comes to wanting to just fall asleep.
So this is going to be an unusual recording.
I'm laughing because it's going to be a bit weird but what I'm going to do is I'm going to ask you to first of all get yourself in a position, not any kind of, it's not yoga, but in a position like sitting down in a safe environment, a chair that supports your body. You might think well why would I sit in a chair that doesn't support my body.
When I say that I'm talking about more if you was to fall asleep so you don't fall out of the chair.
So something that keeps you in the chair if you fall asleep or lie down in a bed if that's what you choose. Now lying down in a bed I will warn you that because I have such a boring voice that even if I was just talking about carpet tiles you'd probably doze off to sleep because that's just what happens when you hear my voice because I just drone on and on and on and on and on and I'm the same I fall asleep when I lie down.
Your body and your mind connects laying down to going to sleep.
It connects being in bed to sleeping. Now of course as you get older there's other things you can do in bed apparently I've heard that can be fun. I guess like I suppose the most excitement I have in bed is perhaps eating biscuits but a packet of biscuits, cup of tea, watching tv you know that's that's an exciting evening for me.
So but it's not about me it's about you and it's about these I mean it it could be different things can't it? It could be lots of things lots of worries and concerns all kind of mixed together. It could be as you see people express that they have a racing mind which is the opposite to what you really ideally would need to slow down. And relax.
Now listening to me regardless of what I say I literally could just be talking about the curtains or just talking about all the different times I've cut my toenails and your mind would start to slow down. That could be due to distraction, due to boredom, due to actually just being in quite a good physical position to relax. Sitting down in a comfortable chair associations with that chair could be quite relaxing.
Maybe you only sit down when you're watching telly or maybe you have a little cat nap or you lie down in bed because that's where we sleep or that's where you sleep. We don't all sleep in your bed you sleep in your bed. So those thoughts that you have in that moment when you're lying there or when you're just wanting to relax.
You've finished it's been a busy day you just want to unwind. Maybe you're planning to go out in a few hours time and you just kind of want to prepare yourself you want to relax get yourself into a good space and just feel calm and just enjoy that physical pleasure you get when your body relaxes and when your mind relaxes. Or of course when you're lying down in bed the last thing you really want to do is anything.
That's kind of the whole point of lying down in bed. I mean I'm like that if I'm in a relationship I don't want to do anything I'm very lazy and I just want to lie there and it's the same as if I'm going to sleep. I just want to lie there I want to enjoy the experience of relaxing because it is actually pleasurable.
So if you've been on your feet all day long or you've been rushing around doing this working going to college school or just running around after your kids looking after people sitting in an office whatever whatever it is you're doing during the day. It's so nice to just get off your feet and lie down or get off your bum and lie down.
I mean sometimes I lie down because I spend way too much time sitting on my big fat bum but lying down is nice because I'm stretched out and it feels nice to be in a different position a different physical position to just bend over you know that sounds weird but you know in a chair sitting position to just be in one position for long periods of time is not particularly good for our bodies at least when you're in your bed you can stretch.
I like to turn on my left and maybe on my right not because I'm trying to get to sleep because I never try to get to sleep. I really don't care. I mean personally that's my attitude towards going to sleep.
I lie down on the bed I get comfortable and I just enjoy the comfort. I have zero interest in how long it takes me to go to sleep or even if I do fall asleep I don't care and that's an attitude that can be useful. It may seem foreign to you if you're not that way at the moment but the more pressure you put on yourself to fall asleep the less likely you're gonna fall asleep.
It really is that simple. Just in the same way as if you was I don't know taking a driving test you would want someone in the back of the car shouting at you saying remember to look in your remember to do this. You wouldn't want that.
You'd kick them out of the car wouldn't you? I mean what you probably wouldn't have someone in the back of your car during a driving test anyway but you'd want them out. You'd want them gone so that you can relax and just focus on what you're doing. Yet we have that stuff going on in our heads and we almost seem to just accept it.
Well it's there can't do nothing about it. It's a thought. Well that's not totally true.
Well it is a thought but you can do something about it. You don't have to put up with it. You don't see if you've got negative thoughts about yourself.
We all have them. Some people have them more than others. It is almost like a victim mentality comes in which again is natural.
It's you know it's a natural way to be sometimes. Like well I've got no control over it. These voices you know I'm sort of telling myself horrible things and I can't do anything about it.
The fact is if you're walking down the street and everywhere you went you had this little goblin following you around or a little child goblin whatever a little goblin following you around calling you names telling you that you're not good enough. You're not you know commenting negatively on your appearance just being negative. The kind of rubbish that we say to ourselves you'd end up you'd end up doing something.
You wouldn't put up with it for long. You'd end up having to punch that little goblin kick them push them in front of a bus whatever or run away. You couldn't put up with it.
You wouldn't put up with it. Nobody would because it would just drive you up the wall. Yet for some reason because it's internal it seems to be well put up with it and I say no.
I say no. Now if you if you want to be a victim and if you want to keep putting up with it and if you want to be like helpless and I'll do nothing about it it's in my head and I do I can't do nothing about it. Well enjoy it.
Enjoy having no sleep. Enjoy being miserable because some people do enjoy being miserable. They enjoy being a victim and they love complaining and it gives them pleasure and sharing that misery seems to give them even more pleasure.
Now there are some people like that and I think you should all move to an island and live together and be miserable together but this recording isn't for those people. This is for people that don't want that crap. You're not willing to put up with it anymore and because sleep relaxation is so valuable so valuable as is your time.
Now I've noticed as I've got older time has become more valuable. In fact in a way there's nothing as valuable as time. I'd say time is even more valuable than health in some ways because time keeps going past keeps going by regardless there's nothing you can do about time.
You can do something about health. You can get yourself healthier, eat healthier, exercise and all the things that I don't do but time doesn't matter what you do it's gonna tick tick tock tock by. It's very valuable.
Do you want to spend that time wasting it on feeling crappy or would you prefer to choose to feel more relaxed to feel happier and to get some decent sleep? Again if you if you're thinking well I like feeling sorry for myself and I can relate to that. That's the thing I can relate to being a victim. I can relate to feeling sorry for myself.
I spent years doing it on and off and I loved it at times absolutely loved it loved spreading the misery. I did. I wanted everyone to feel sorry for me.
I wanted to be I loved being the victim. Oh everything happens to me the world's out to get me almost like you know no probably not. You know you're not that important you know perhaps it's time to just accept that you do have choices.
If you want to be miserable go be miserable somewhere else. If you want to be miserable stop the recording and go away. Find someone else that's miserable and share it with them.
Enjoy each other's company. Now I know that doesn't apply to anyone listening to this because I only have intelligent people listening to my recordings. I only have people that want to relax and want to feel calmer and intend to progress further in life with their own mental health and generally feel happier.
So I know that that is my audience. Now that's this is the intro this is the build-up to what I'm going to do. Okay I'm going to ask you to think about some things that you think about when you're trying to sleep.
So this is quite a good opportunity to do it. So you can lie down if you're not lying down already you may already be asleep. Sitting down in a chair if you're looking to relax.
We can do it in time we can do it in the moment. So what's going on in your mind? What memories are plaguing you? What worries are concerning you? What are those things that really are affecting your ability to relax deeply or to just fall asleep? You know to relax in bed. It's just a relaxing bit.
The falling asleep bit is like one percent of the process. Probably less than one percent. It's almost like 0.0.0 whatever.
Falling asleep is just relaxing. That's all it is. And then you start to drift and then that's it.
You don't know when you've fallen asleep. You never know at what point you fall asleep. So the actual falling asleep bit happens instantly.
The process of drifting towards falling asleep. That happens with relaxation and it only happens generally with increased relaxation and you start to drift. Of course there's times when you're so tired you just lie down and just fall asleep.
We've all done that as well. You know when you're just absolutely exhausted. Maybe you've been trying to keep your eyes open to finish a movie but then you end up falling asleep anyway.
It may interrupt the other people in the cinema especially if you snore. Now I've done this in the past. I paid for the boxing and it comes on at two o'clock in the morning and I'm sitting there watching it.
And this is something I've paid for. Something I'm looking forward to. My world title fight.
I might have been looking forward to it for six months and come four o'clock in the morning when the fight's just starting Sometimes I'm practically asleep. I'm not enjoying it because I'm not awake. All I want to do is go to sleep.
And it's really hard actually to keep yourself awake when you're that tired. It's one of the hardest things I think to do because we're going against nature. And when your eyelids are really heavy and you know that feeling.
That feeling is so familiar to you that you know that nothing is going to stop you from falling asleep. And it's not because you want to fall asleep because you may not want to. You might as I said you might want to finish that movie.
There's still an hour and 10 minutes left. I want to finish the movie man. I've been looking forward to this for at least three and a half minutes.
I want to watch it. But your eyelids want something different and your body and your mind you know your mind's just slowly shutting down and all your body and mind wants is for you to pretty much just come to a standstill and fall asleep. It doesn't want anything else.
But your conscious mind wants to stay awake and watch the movie or the boxing or whatever. So that familiar feeling is something worth remembering. That familiar feeling of just almost it takes over you.
It completely takes over you. You know when you're really tired and some people say well I get really tired and then my mind's racing. A different kind of feeling.
That feeling of overall tiredness cannot be disturbed by your mind. Because your mind is causing the tiredness. Your mind is part of it.
So when you're feeling so tired you can't even focus on anything. Even though you try you just can't. And it's that paradox of the more you try to stay awake the sleepier you get.
The more you try and keep your eyes open the heavier your eyelids get. And it can be really annoying at times. But also a useful resource when you start to think about those times in the past when you've been lying in your bed and you've been trying to almost force yourself to fall asleep or force yourself to relax.
And you can't. So going with what is natural changes how you do things. Changes how you perceive the situation.
So simply you know in a way of just lying in your bed you can think to yourself I'm going to stay awake. I'm going to stay awake. And you're lying there with your eyes closed.
Maybe in the dark. Trying to stay awake becomes very very difficult. Very difficult.
So going back to those thoughts that you may have had in the past where you know we describe it as a racing brain. Lots of thoughts that you don't want. You know thinking and remembering stuff that is negative and just not useful.
It's not the right time to be thinking of that stuff. If you're lying in your bed there's no there's no room for those kinds of thoughts. You know negative or horrible thinking or putting yourself down or there's never a time for that really.
But what you can do or what I'm going to do is you can interrupt it. So if you think of your thoughts and to be fair I imagine it might my I might be wrong but I imagine that a lot of those thought patterns and memories or whatever it just plays the same way as a DVD would play. Almost in the same order every time.
You think this then you think that and you think this and you feel this blah blah blah. And it's just on replay. Automatic loop.
A loop of negativity and disruption to your comfort relaxation and maybe sleep. So what we're going to do is I'm going to stick that DVD. We're going to play it now in your mind.
Okay what I'm going to do is I'm going to interrupt it and every time I interrupt that's going to cause that DVD to scratch. It's going to cause that movie or that memory to scratch. Which means at the end of this you won't be able to replay that CD or that DVD the way that you used to.
It's not going to work anymore. It's just going to be a scratch. A scrambled mess of meaningless stuff.
And when a DVD doesn't work when a DVD disc stops being useful to you or a CD. I know that we're more into sort of streaming these days but it doesn't quite work with streaming. So you know it's old maybe it's old-fashioned to talk about DVDs and CDs but we all know what they are.
We all understand the concept behind them. Once it's scratched to bits, unplayable, unusable, you could use it as a coaster for your cup of tea on the table or as a frisbee. In fact if you go on YouTube there's actually things you can do with CDs once they're broke.
Some people melt them down and make furniture believe it or not. It's amazing. So let me just have a little cup of coffee.
It's cold but hey people drink iced coffee and iced tea don't they in the summer. Technically it is the summer it's July. Why don't we tell the weather that then.
Hey Mr. Clouds did you not know it's July. So think of something that gets in the way of you feeling relaxed. That you feel gets in the way of you feeling relaxed.
Whether you're sitting in a chair or lying down on bed on the bed. Think of something right. What I want you to do is to if it's a let's say it's a memory.
Okay I want you to notice the screen size. Is it like a big huge screen? It's almost like you're watching it and it's huge and it's all in full color. High definition.
Which it probably it may well be. What I want you to do is shrink the TV down so it's a tiny little telly. Maybe the size of a mobile phone.
And just have that sitting maybe on the wall attached to the wall but a tiny little screen. And now drain the color out. So it's just black and white.
Now those some people might not know what black and white is but most people probably do. It's just basically it's when you in the old days colors. I can't I'm not going to do a history lesson.
It's basically you take the color out of the screen so that everything's pretty much just grey. Grey, black, white. That's about it.
So you drain the color out. Turn the sound down. So all you've got is this small picture of this memory.
It's already changed. So if you look at that, are you going to let that disturb your sleep? That's one question. Okay so what I want you to do now is just play it.
Start at the beginning. You know where the memory starts. You know where it ends.
Start at the beginning. This thing that you think about. And again I want you to think about something that really is something that repeats.
That you think about it a lot. Too much maybe. And it does get in the way of sleeping, relaxing, maybe other things in your life.
So just play this through on this little screen. And as you play it through, because it's got no sound, I'll add a little bit of sound. And I want you to play it through to the end.
Okay. And then I want you to just basically rewind it instantly and play it through again. Now.
I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world. Made of plastic. It's fantastic.
You can dry my hair. Undress me anywhere. I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world.
Okay sorry. Did that disrupt you? Okay sorry. Go back.
Go back again. We'll play it again. So we're going to start from the beginning.
This is a memory that's like really affecting your sleep. Yeah it used to. Okay.
Are you gonna still let it? I don't think you will. But anyway it's there. So sorry to disrupting you there.
So you can just go rewind it and start playing it again. Now I want you to try and get that feeling. Okay.
I really want you to get that feeling as much as you can. Get into the feeling. Because it's not the memory, it's the feeling that affects you.
It's your response to thinking about that thing that's no longer valid. That's no longer useful. That's getting in the way.
So it's your response to it. So play it again now. And just play it to the end and then rewind it instantly and play it back again on a loop.
Ready? Now play it. When no one else can understand me. When everything I do is wrong.
You give me no time for meditation. You give me strength to carry on. Carry on.
Keep watching it. Get into that feeling. Oh get into that feeling.
Go on. Get into that feeling. Keep watching it.
Really get into it. The wonder of you. Go on.
Go on. Get into it. Did you enjoy that? Did you get into that feeling? How do you feel now as you watch that? How's that memory? How's that memory feeling for you? That image.
That little movie. What's your response to it now? Try and get back into that feeling. Try.
Okay we'll do it one more time. This time what we need to do is play it through and then rewind it. But actually watch it rewinding.
In fact what we'll do now is just fast forward it right to the end and play it back now. Cup of coffee please. Right so how did that feel? Apart from annoying voices.
That might be annoying. I mean if you want an annoying voice that's going to distract you from sleeping. I'm your man.
I'm the one with the annoying voices. Don't bother with old pointless memories. I'll give you some new stuff.
I've got an annoying voice. I've got an annoying voice for you. So how do you feel with that memory? Is this something that's really bugged you? I want stuff that's really been getting on your nerves.
Really been affecting your sleep. The thing that you blame. Because we love to blame don't we? Always love to blame others and other people and other things.
It's easier than taking responsibility. So if you think of something that you blame for not being able to sleep. What's the biggest thing? Think of that thing now.
So is it a voice? So there's got to be times when you hear or when you say horrible things to yourself. When you're trying to relax. When you're trying to sleep.
It might just be I'm not going to get any sleep. I'm not going to be able to fall asleep. I'm not going to be able to.
I'll struggle. I find it hard to relax. Some people get so much enjoyment telling other people about how they can't sleep.
Or how they struggle to relax. Oh I never relax. Me no never.
Okay you never go to the toilet either. Yeah I do go to the toilet. Well you relax then don't you? What do you mean? Well you have to relax to go to the toilet.
Oh no my brain's going to explode. I can't control it. I don't understand.
And anyone that thinks they don't sleep. They do. That's also bullshit.
Everybody sleeps. We might not feel that we sleep. We might not feel the benefit of sleeping.
And we may not sleep enough. But everybody falls asleep. Because if you did fall asleep you could be dead.
So there you go. We have to sleep. We can't function as humans without having some sleep.
So what things do you say to yourself? What horrible things do you say to yourself? Let's get this out of the oven. Come on. Let's sort this out now.
Let's not pussyfoot around. What horrible stuff do you say to yourself that gets in the way of you feeling relaxed? Because let's face it. If you're being horrible to yourself.
It's not the most relaxing situation is it? So if I'm sitting in bed. Lying down in bed. You know thinking to myself.
Oh I'm so fat. I'm so ugly. I'm so old.
I'm never gonna find anyone that wants to hold my hand. I'm so fat. I'm so ugly.
If I'm thinking that stuff while I'm lying in bed. It's not the best lullaby in the world is it? You know. It's not conducive to feeling calm and comfortable.
So what I want you to do is think about something. And just be honest. You're not telling me.
I can't hear you. You can say out loud. But I won't be able to hear you.
I'm not on a tree looking through your window with a pair of binoculars. You know. I've not bugged your room.
I don't know what you're saying out loud. So you can just be honest. What is it that you say to yourself that you know is just horrible? You also know that it's not true.
Not really. Maybe sometimes you feel it is true. But generally it's not.
You know. You're you're a decent person. You don't need.
If someone said that to you. You wouldn't put up with it. But for some reason if we say it to ourselves it's okay.
Well no. It's actually worse. Because if we keep saying it to ourselves.
We believe it a lot quicker than if other people say it to us. It goes in a lot quicker. The best person to give you hypnotic suggestions that work really quickly is you.
Because what you say to yourself goes right in there. Right into your unconscious mind. And your unconscious mind tries to give you more of what you think about.
It takes you very seriously. It believes that what you think about is what you want. And if you say to yourself.
I'm this. I'm that. Your unconscious mind believes what you're saying.
Because why would you lie to yourself. When actually a lot of things we say to ourselves is not true. Or it's worded very unkindly.
Very cruel. Sometimes the way that we talk to ourselves. And I've said for years and years.
Would you say that to a small child. Think of the things that maybe you. A certain thing that you say to yourself.
Pick the worst. The thing that really you feel really does get in the way of you falling asleep or relaxing. Something that really bugs you.
When you say it to yourself. You feel crappy. And for some reason you believe it.
But then the fact that you're repeating it. Is why you believe it. And there's always ways to find evidence.
To back up any belief. You know I could say well I'm. I'm too ugly to have a girlfriend.
And I can back that up by. Well I haven't got a girlfriend. And I could focus on.
Women that weren't interested in me. And there's been a few. Hard to believe.
But it's been a few women. That zero interest over the years. Or I could look at reality.
I mean that is part of reality. The reality is. That not everybody.
Wants to hold my hand. My little hand. But the evidence shows.
Over the years. Because I'm about 104. There's been a lot of women that did want to hold my hand.
My tiny little. I don't have a little hand. I don't know why I'm saying that.
So whichever way you. Whatever way you go. You can find evidence.
Even if it's flaky evidence. Sometimes just the smallest amount. Can be enough to fuel.
That negativity. Towards ourselves. And I realize that this.
Is going beyond. Relaxation and sleep. This is.
Much bigger. Life. You know this is our life.
Our day to day life. And our well being. Our mental health.
Our physical health as well. Is affected by the things that we say to ourselves. And the things that we think about.
So I'd like you to think of something. Or something horrible that you say to yourself. And I want to ask you to copy what I do.
Right. So I want to think of something I say about myself. And I said it for years.
I don't say it anymore really. But I used to say it for years. And I almost like pride.
I don't really have any pride. Or self respect. But I used to.
Not anymore. But I used to. Tell people this.
It was a put down. I used to put myself down. And I used to really believe it.
Okay. I used to tell people. I'm no good at maths.
I'm. I'm like six. Eight year old level at maths.
I used to tell people that. For years. I'm just crap at maths.
I'm rubbish. Rubbish at mathematics. Anything to do with numbers.
My brain just shuts down. Regardless of how true some of that was. I'm never going to be a mathematician.
I. I guess I had a bit of a learning. I had learning difficulties when I was younger. And mathematics is one of those subjects that I just struggled with.
Everyone struggles with something. You know. I mean if we tried every single thing in the world.
Even the most cleverest people would struggle with certain things. We can't be good at everything. So.
Why I felt the need to tell people. And to think that about myself. Because it went further than that.
It went from. I'm no good at maths. To.
I'm just an idiot. I'm thick. I'm stupid.
Unintelligent. I'm dim. Dumb.
Whatever. And that's how I used to think about myself. So.
What I'm going to do is. I'm going to speak to myself the same as I used to. I don't do it anymore.
So. It's not really real. I don't do this about myself with maths.
But if you've got something that you say to yourself. I want you to do what I'm going to do. OK.
So. Think of that sentence. The thing that really you say to yourself.
That you know. As. As this hour has gone by.
You start to realize. Oh. Yeah.
There is that thing that I say to myself. And the good thing about this is. You haven't got to tell anybody.
There's no audience listening to you. Saying. Well.
This is what I say to myself. Because. There's no embarrassment to be had.
This is just reality. This is fact. This is what is.
What is it that you say to yourself. What is it do you think about yourself. What horrible things.
And it might not be vicious. It might be a put down. It might just be limited thinking.
It might be as simple as. Oh. Oh.
I can't. You know. I struggle to get to sleep.
I have insomnia. Some people wear that as a badge of. Some kind of special badge.
I mean. I see it online. Who's.
Who's going to join the Wide Awake Club tonight. Almost as if they're got. Proud.
That they're awake. And they're struggling. And.
Instead of actually doing something about it. Now I know that people listening to this. You do something about it.
People listening to this recording. Are not victims. In a sense of.
Wanting to feel sorry for themselves. I know that you're. Ready.
And willing. And able. To make changes.
When they're necessary. Changes that help you. To change your life.
Not just when it comes to falling asleep. Or relaxing. But.
Generally. To improve your happiness. So think about that thing.
Just one sentence that you say to yourself. That is limiting. Ignorance.
Maybe even abusive. Verbally abusive. Harsh.
Something that you. Think about when you're in bed. Or maybe when you're trying to relax.
And this might be a sentence that goes over and over in your mind. Or it might be something that's almost like in the background. Like a big dark shadow.
Just lurking. You don't even have to hear it anymore. You don't have to say it to yourself anymore.
It's just there. Like wallpaper. Really crappy.
1970s wallpaper. And not all wallpaper from 1970s is crappy. But I'm just think of think of some wallpaper that you've seen.
Do people even use wallpaper anymore? It doesn't matter. It's not relevant is it to this. But my brain started to think.
I want to talk about wallpaper now. Look what you've done. So think of this sentence.
And if it is a feeling. If it's just a feeling that you have. Or if it is just this dark shadow.
Lurking. Think of this. The word.
Think of a sentence that fits. Now I want to say my sentence. But I want you to do exactly what I'm doing.
So this sentence for me is. I'm no good at maths. I'm useless at maths.
I'm just stupid. That's it really. The maths bit.
Not that relevant. The I'm stupid. I'm useless.
My views don't count. My thoughts don't count. To think you know.
I'm useless is horrible. I'm stupid and I'm useless. And my my you know.
I'm stupid and I'm useless. Okay. So that that even though you could say.
Well it's not that harsh really. It is. It really is.
Because if you turn it around. And you walked up to a small child. Your grandson.
Your child. Your nephew. Or just some random kid.
You know. You walk up to a little kid. Eating an ice cream.
And you go up to him and say. You know what. You're stupid.
You're useless. How is that little child gonna feel. You know.
He's like maybe six years old. Five years old. He understands the words you're saying.
He knows what it means. And he's gonna believe you. And that could actually affect that child for a long time.
Because if he believes it. He absorbs it. And he might live his life out.
Based on that belief. Which is untrue. Which is why we need to be careful what we tell our children.
Because sometimes they really do take it literally. And they really you know believe it. Even if it's a joke.
Children don't do great with jokes. Unless it's a silly obvious joke. If you joke around.
There's a chance they might actually believe what you're saying. So it's worth noting that. So just think about it.
What is the thing. So I'm going to do mine. Think about yours.
What is that one thing that really you would summary up as being the thing. Thoughts. The words.
The ideas. The feeling. Whatever words you would connect to that thing getting in the way.
If you've fallen asleep or relaxing deeply. That one sentence. I'm going to do my sentence.
And then I'm going to ask you to do yours. So to start with. Just going to do it normally.
Try and do it in the voice that you hear it. With the same tone. The same energy.
So mine was used to be. I'm stupid. I'm an idiot.
I'm never going to accomplish anything. My life is pointless. I'm not worth anything.
I'm worthless. That is how I used to feel. Okay.
It's harsh. It's negative. It's not nice to hear.
And it's not. It's not nice to say to be fair. And but generally, I don't feel that way.
And these days. So it's quite upsetting to say out loud, really, to be fair. So I want you to say it, but I don't want you to do it in your voice.
I don't want you to do it in a different voice. Because you already know what it feels like. You don't need to do it in normal voice for you to get in touch with the feeling because you're already in touch with the feeling.
So I want you to do it in a different voice. A silly voice. So just do it in a different tone.
Not even a silly one. Just like. I'm stupid.
And I'm rubbish at maths. And I'm thick. And I'm worthless.
So say something like that. Give that a go. Just do it in a different kind of a voice.
A little bit slower. Maybe a bit of a slur. So give that a go.
And do that now. Notice how that feels different from before. So now I'm going to do it in a different voice and you can copy my voice as well.
This time I'm going to do a bit of a higher pitched voice. I'm stupid. I'm thick.
I'm no good at maths at all. I'm useless. And I'm worthless.
Okay. Again, it still sounds a bit harsh. But having a high pitched voice.
When I said it to myself, I'll be honest, I didn't take it very seriously. So give it a go. Do what I did.
Just do a high pitched voice. Your own version. And do that now.
Notice how it feels maybe you might find yourself laughing. Because it is a weird experience. If you've not done it before.
I'm I'm doing I do silly voices all the time. When I'm doing my Let Me Bore You To Sleep. It's just I think it's just a release.
Because that's what I do when I'm on my own. I just make I just do silly things. So this time, we're going to do it.
And we're going to put an accent on. So you may already have an accent. I mean, you could be any part of the world.
I don't know. So I'm going to put on an accent. And it's not to be offensive towards the person who might have the accent.
Okay. It's just to do a different accent. That's all.
So if you're if so, if I do French accent, and you're in France, you maybe do a German accent. Or if you're in South Africa, you could do an American accent. And if you're in America, maybe do a Chinese accent, you know, it's just whatever, it doesn't matter.
It's just about doing something different. So here we go. And I'm trying to fit.
Okay. Oh, you can still do it in that in that high pitched voice, but with a different accent. I'm stupid.
And I'm thick. And I also I'm no good at maths. And I'm worthless.
That was weird. When I said I'm worthless, that felt a bit jarring. So that's a word.
As you break it down, you start to notice there's certain parts aren't that really affected. You don't don't affect you as much as others. The I'm no good at maths used to affect me.
And but not so much now. But the whole sentence, I'm worthless. The I'm thick, I'm stupid.
I know I'm not. I've proved that. To myself, I went to university, late 30s.
And I got my degree at 40. So I proved that academically, I'm not where I thought I was. Okay, you don't need to prove it to yourself.
You just got to believe he's got to realize that, you know, that you're not what other people said you are. I was used to be told I was stupid. And I believe that I absorbed it.
And I believed it. But it turned out I wasn't. I was a bit of a surprise.
Didn't find out until I was much older. But hey, can't believe I suddenly got some confidence and now got a big bald patch on the head. Brilliant.
And of course, my tiny little hands. How am I ever going to get married? So, but that's saying I'm worthless. That felt crappy, actually.
If you can hear all the dogs in the background. Brilliant. So that felt crappy.
So I'm gonna have to do something with that. Do do that again, your sentence with an accent. And just notice how it feels.
If there's part of it that doesn't really matter anymore. But there might be one part that actually does still shake you a little bit jars you a little bit. Just give it a go.
With the high-pitched voice and an accent. Do that now. Okay, so just how did that feel? How did that change how you feel? And was there any part of it that you noticed as you said it? Because you have to, once you're doing it like a weird voice and you're putting on a different accent, you almost have to look for the words, you know, to try and remember the sentence.
Because it doesn't come as fluently as it did. It doesn't quite roll off the tongue the way it did, because you're consciously thinking about it. So you've moved it from being unconscious thinking, where you're automatically thinking about it without thinking about it consciously, to consciously thinking about it, which means it's not as easy to get up as it was before.
It's not as easy to get that sentence together as it was. It's almost like the only way that that sentence is going to happen, the only way that those words are going to be, you're going to hear those words in your mind, is when you consciously try to put those sentences together, because it's been removed from your unconscious mind. And it's almost we've extracted it, taken out of the vault, taken it out of the filing system, and we've now changed them so they no longer fit where they were.
And now that they're out of the filing system, now that they're out of that automation, you know, where it used to be just automatically thinking that stuff in your mind, it's no longer there. It's been taken out of it because it doesn't fit anymore, because you've changed it, you've had some weird sounds, and it can no longer fit where it was. So when you're lying down in your bed or sitting in your chair, relaxing or wanting to go to sleep, or just, you know, chilling out, that stuff can't come up anymore automatically, because it's no longer unconscious.
It's in your conscious mind, and you're too aware of it. In the same way I said recently, once you know that there's an alligator, a little baby alligator in your bath, you're not going to get into the water anymore, are you? You can't unknow something like that. You're never going to accidentally, you're not going to go to the hospital and say, yeah, yeah, I lost one of my balls.
Yeah, unfortunately, alligator was in the bath water. Yeah, no, I knew he was there. I just forgot.
Yeah, he's been there a few months. I just forgot he was there. No, it's not going to happen.
You're never going to forget. So once these words of negativity that you've maybe been saying to yourself for years and years and years, and all the emotions connected to it, all the emotions and maybe the memories and the examples of situations that almost backed up that negative, limited, horrible stuff has now changed, because it's not valid anymore. Those connections have been severed.
So it's now just on its own. That sentence is just on its own. And on its own, it doesn't have clothes anymore.
All the makeup's been taken off. The weave's been removed. The nails, you know, the false nails, false eyebrows and eyelashes and the false legs gone.
It's just there, naked, that words, those words that muddled up have no meaning. You change the words around a little bit, which you maybe decide to in your mind, just do that now. The meaning's gone.
The energy's gone. So those words, it's just a sentence. Now, if there is, like I found a little bit of, oh, the worth, I'm worthless.
Oh, that's, that's, that's the only bit of the whole sentence that really had any effect on me. So you might have a bit there. So if there's any bit, or what part of it is left that actually has a little bit of a, oh, that doesn't feel very nice.
The rest of it, don't care no more, can't affect you. Or maybe the whole thing can't affect you anymore. But if there is anything, what we're going to do is do something a little bit different.
I want you to focus on the sentence. Focus on the words that maybe have the negative response that caused, you know, the negative, like with the I'm worthless, like, oh, encircle that word, or those words. For example, I'm worthless, I've encircled it in my mind.
Is it true? Is it true? That's the question. Is it true? Yes or no? No. No, it's not.
And you know what? When you realise that it's not true, that negative stuff that you've been saying about yourself isn't true, then you can decide that actually, as I just decided now, that to say to myself that I'm worthless, I'm never ever going to say that again. No, it's not acceptable. Walking up to a small child, you're worthless.
How horrible is that? So how do we drain the energy out of that sentence? Once and for all, drain all of the energy. What we can do is you've got the sentence, you've got each word in those sentences. So maybe it's a paragraph, but you know, like all the different things I said about myself, all the things that you've been saying, attach helium balloons to each individual word in your mind.
And of course, what's going to happen, they're going to float into the sky. They're going to rise up and just watch them all rise into the sky. And just feel that sense of comfort and relaxation that you experience as those words, negative words, rise higher and higher in the sky.
And the further they get away, the further they move into the distance, the harder it is to even remember what they were, because it's no longer valid. Because they're gone, floating higher and higher. And you can see them barely in the distance.
Now they're gone, gone forever. Now how do you feel? I feel different. There's a real, real change in how I feel.
Right now, something's changed within me. So that brings us to the end of this recording. I'm going to count from 10 down to one.
And you can relax so, so deeply. And if you want, you can drift further and further asleep with every number. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1,
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.