Read along
Complete transcript
Vidi, stop staring at me. Hello and welcome to... Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland.
Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. I'll just turn the TV off. Vidi has just had one of his favourite bacon treats.
They're not actually bacon, but they're doggy treats, but they look like rashes of bacon. They smell really nice. I'd like to say I've not tasted them, but I haven't.
I don't know, I might have licked one. I'm generally not too fussy what I lick. But they don't taste like they smell.
A little bit, but not in a way that they just smell nice. If someone handed you some food, a sandwich, and it smelled like that, unless you were a vegetarian or vegan, or if you didn't like bacon, because pigs are dirty animals, name a clean one, name a clean one, then you might not like them. But other than that, I've known a lot of vegans and vegetarians over the years, during my Buddhist-y time, and someone once said to me that they felt ill when they smelled meat.
And I thought, even when I was a vegetarian and a vegan, and I've gone through that period, and I've gone years without eating meat, I still like the smell of it. The smell of a sausage. Anyway, this is not about veganism and stuff.
This, my dear friends, is going to be... I'm going to take an online autism test. I'm so excited. I took my first online autism test probably 20 years ago.
So, I've done a few of these over the years, but I haven't done one for a while. So, I just thought it would be fun, so I'll do that. Before I start, I'll continue... Stop! Don't be knocking the microphone, mate, please.
I gave him a shower last night, because he had these little bugs that were jumping on me. I didn't know if they were fleas or what they were. They're very small.
But I gave him a nice shower with his flea shampoo, and since then, he's been not scratching or anything. So, hopefully, he got rid of them. I don't know what they were.
They didn't seem... Yeah, they just didn't seem flea-y. Flea-y, if you know what I mean. But they were absolutely tiny.
I mean, there's a chance, I mean, he does say hello to a few dogs, that something might have jumped on him from another dog. Or, if he likes to go into the long grass at every opportunity, he might have got something from the cats. The cats go in the grass.
You know, it might not have been a dog flea. It might not have been a dog anything. He might have caught it.
For me, I might have fleas. I mean, I haven't had fleas for weeks. I don't think I've got them anymore.
Anyway. So, I do have a YouTube channel, which you can check. Just search for my name, Jason Newland.
Every day, or every time, I make a new recording, I create a video, a 10-hour video, from that recording. It's 10 hours with a dark screen. So, there's 10 seconds of me, or 10 seconds of the image of the video, and then that's it.
And then, black screen for the rest of the 10 hours. I make this recording available in six different versions. Oh dear.
I had such a good sleep last night. It's very rare for me to just... You know, I'm kind of a sleeper. I sleep now and then, and just sleep, and whenever.
But I slept from... What was it? Just after 10 o'clock, and I woke up at half seven. I mean, I did wake up a couple of times in the night time, to do a wee-wee. But I think the last, or maybe once, I woke up about 1.30. And then, went back to sleep, and woke up at half seven.
It was like, blimey. I felt so refreshed. So refreshed.
I wish I knew what it was that I did right. Because, I don't have a trouble getting to sleep. It's just, I don't generally sleep for long periods of time.
And then I wake up, and I'll have a sleep in the afternoon, and whatever. I just sleep whenever I want. But I don't, you know... It's not that I have a trouble getting to sleep, I just don't... Sometimes I just don't stay asleep for more than four or five hours.
And, sometimes I just get up, you know, things to do in the... Things to do, baby. But last night, I just slept all the way through. And I was planning to get up at about 1.32, to watch the boxing live.
But luckily, the boxing was on prime, and I could watch it back. Anyway, it's recorded. So I just watched the whole thing when I woke up.
The same with the designers, well they do that. But Sky doesn't. Sky, you've got to watch it there and then.
Unless it's a particularly big fight, and they might put it on playback. I guess it just costs some money to store it all. Anyway, so I've got my YouTube channel.
I do my recording in six different versions. One without music. Five hours and ten hours without music.
And then one with music. Five and ten hours with music. And... Yeah, that's it.
The... Woah! It's a Kevin MacLeod music in the background. And the details of that are on the podcast. Let me just check I'm correct when I say that.
On the podcast, if you have a look. Yep, all the details on the first page of the podcast. Background music, copyright free details.
Deep relaxation, Kevin MacLeod. Stop standing on the laptop Vinnie! He's trying to type. Incompetech.com, licensed under Creative Commons by attribution 3.0. Licensed by creativecommons.org. Licensed by 3.0. Promoted by 3music.
Bg.command. Chossik.com But you can read all that on the podcast. If you'd like to support me, you can support me by PayPal. If you would like to.
To cover my costs. So right, here we go. Man, just to let you know that Molly is, from what I can tell, is on the mend.
And things are going well, so yay! Right, here we go. What I've done, I might do more than one of these, just for fun. The one I've found to start with is, this is the website.
DiverseDiagnostics.co.uk And, I've clicked on a link and it's forward slash autism dash test forward slash hash start underscore autism underscore test But if you go to DiverseDiagnostics.co.uk The first page is, oh wait a minute. Oh no, okay. Oh no, I've lost it.
No, it's gone to, I've lost it, where? No, oh there it is. Free autism test, yeah. Oh come on, please.
Take our free autism test online. So, are you wondering, or If you or someone you care about might have autism? Take our free autism test today. Designed specifically for individuals aged 18 and above.
Whatever the results may reveal, please know that you are not alone on this journey. We understand how you might be feeling and our team is here to offer support and guidance every step of the way. Right, I should say before I continue that I'm not doing this as a joke.
Right, I'm not doing this as a making fun of people with autism at all. But, in the past I've done these tests and I've always come up very, very high. And so, that's why.
It used to be Asperger's test, or Asperger's depending on how you pronounce it. But now, that term's not used anymore, in the UK at least. It's now being on the autistic spectrum, or autism spectrum.
The autism spectrum, yeah. So, I'm going to do this, as I say, I'm not mocking by doing this. I'm just, I just find it very interesting.
I might see if I can find some kind of other, like narcissism tests and No, I'm not comparing the two tests. I'm just saying, just be interested, I'm just trying to discover myself, you know. Trying to find out a little bit more about myself.
Right. So, it says, take the autism test online now. Ready to take control of your mental health journey.
Getting started is easy. Click through our secure platform. Initiate the online autism test.
And begin the process of discovering your cognitive profile. Our goal is to empower you with knowledge and insights that pave the way for informed decision making and effective management of autism. Before, OK, I've not started the test yet, but it says, The autism spectrum quotient, or quotient, quotient, AQ test will help you recognize the signs and symptoms of adult autism.
This is a thorough test that takes 10 to 15 minutes to complete. Internationally recognized. The autism test is recognized by the National Institute of Health, NIH.
A validated tool used by the NHS. Extensive research ensures the accuracy and reliability of its results. And comprehensive.
The test helps you understand if you are likely to have autism traits and to identify areas where you might benefit from support. However, it cannot, this is important, it cannot replace, it doesn't say this is important, just, I know that this is an important bit. However, it cannot replace a full assessment and it should not be used to self-diagnose or decide upon a treatment plan.
It's a great first step on your journey, giving you a better understanding of whether you have significant autism traits and if an autism assessment is worthwhile considering. How reliable is the autism screaming test? Oh, okay, so they're offering, this is, I guess they're trying to, yeah, they do offer things to pay for as well. Let's have a look at this, look at this, let's have a look, look, look, look, look, look.
Oh, wow. Fees and flexible payment plans at Diverse Diagnostics. At Diverse Diagnostics, we make clinical care more accessible to everyone who needs it.
Oh, what are you doing? Okay, for what? Oh, adult, here we go. Patient-focused psychiatrist-led hour assessment fees. Adult autism screening.
£440. One hour clinical session with adult consultant psychiatrist. We'll screen for autism spectrum disorder.
Mental state completed. And then report with recommendations if further evaluation of autism is required. Then you've got adult autism assessments.
£2,400. Clinical interview with consultant psychiatrist. Standardised scales sent out.
What do they weigh you? Neurodevelopmental screening questionnaire with consultant psychiatrist. ADOS-2 assessment completed face-to-face. And then feedback to the individual.
All ASD assessments and reports are completed within eight weeks. Pending that all information questionnaires are returned within requested time frames. And then you've got the adult ADHD assessment.
I don't have that. No. I might do it on my test, but no.
I've not got ADHD. From what I know, I know a little bit about ADHD and I don't fit that criteria at all. I'm way too slow.
And I'm not saying being autistic is nothing to do with autism. I am not fast. Not super like... I don't know.
I feel like I've got to stop talking. I might get myself in trouble. Sorry, everyone.
Mind you, the podcast won't be very good if I stop talking. Mind you, it might be better. If I just sat here and didn't say anything, it might be the best podcast I ever made.
Oh, think about it. Right, so should we do the test? Come on, baby. Let's do the test.
Start autism test. I hope it gives you answers while I'm actually doing it. I mean like at the end of the 15 minutes rather than having to send off for it or whatever.
So, take the autism test online now. Ready to take control of your... OK, I've already read this. Getting started is easy.
Click through to our secure platform. Initiate the online autism test. And begin the process of discovering your cognitive profile.
Our goal is to empower you with knowledge and insight. That paved the way for informed decision making and effective management of autism. So, here we go.
Here's the first question. I prefer to do things with others rather than on my own. Definitely agree.
Slightly agree. Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree.
Let's read the question again. You can maybe answer some of these questions for me. Based on maybe what you know about me.
I prefer to do things with others rather than on my own. Definitely agree. Slightly agree.
Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree. Definitely disagree.
OK. I prefer to do things the same way over and over again. Definitely agree.
Slightly agree. Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree.
What do you think? I prefer to do things the same way over and over again. Definitely agree. To be fair, it's not that I like to.
That's what I like to do. It's just, I don't know. If I try to imagine something, I find it very easy to create a picture in my mind.
Definitely agree. Slightly agree. Slightly disagree.
Definitely disagree. No, not great with the old creating pictures in my mind. Yeah, definitely disagree.
I do not find that easy. Definitely agree. I frequently get so strongly absorbed in one thing that I lose sight of other things.
The reason I'm laughing is because it's just ridiculous how I am like that. I frequently get so strongly absorbed in one thing that I lose sight of other things. Definitely agree.
Four choices. Definitely agree. Slightly agree.
Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree. Yeah, there's no two ways about that.
I often notice small sounds when others do not. Definitely agree. I'm quite aware of sounds.
But I'm an auditory person. Very auditory. I'm very listen-y.
I love, well I don't love all sounds, but I do. Like right now, as I'm talking to you, we've got the wind. I've got the window open.
And there's wind outside. And it's lovely. I just love the sound of the wind.
Not when I'm in it, or out in it. But when I'm inside and it's windy outside. Depends on how loose the tree is outside the house.
I said I don't want a tree falling on me. But I do like, we've got a huge tree outside. Massive.
If it ever did topple, it would take the whole building away with it. Honestly, it's huge. One of the biggest trees I've ever seen in my life.
That was a bit of a lie. It probably isn't. But it is quite big.
It's a very big tree. Okay, I often notice small sounds when others do not. You know sometimes I think, I'm being paranoid.
Like I'm hearing things. Am I listening for things? Or I just hear stuff. I mean I even hear stuff that Vinnie doesn't hear.
But he hears stuff that I don't hear. Between the two of us, it's constant barking from both of us really. Next one.
I usually notice car number plates or similar strings of information. Yeah, pretty much. Strings of information, yes.
But not like hugely. Do I? I do notice things. I do.
I do notice things. I'm going to say slightly agree. Not definitely agree.
But it's not as strong as that. Definitely agree. I notice every single... I do notice number plates.
I look at number plates. But I just... I'm not obsessed with number plates. I don't drive, so cars are not really that important to me.
Yeah, I don't know. I'm going to say slightly agree with that one. I'm a bit uncertain.
Other people frequently tell me that what I've said is impolite. Even though I think it's polite. Well, I'd have answered this definitely agree 20 years ago.
Because I was getting in trouble a lot. Not like bad trouble. Sometimes bad trouble when I was younger.
But just people get upset with me. Because I said something that they didn't like. And I didn't mean it rudely.
And it happened when I was a kid. And I didn't mean it rudely. And then I got to my 20s and I started being rude.
On purpose. Because I realised that people are going to take offence anyway. So I might as well just be offensive.
I'm not proud of it. Not like that anymore. Well, 20s and 30s.
And 40s. I stopped last week. I stopped being rude last... I do sometimes.
Yeah, I've been told that I'm impolite. So I think I'm a polite person. It's not so much polite.
I say the wrong things. And sometimes it's just from humour. Other times it's just genuine.
And I've been taken the wrong way so many times. So... It's harder to answer this because I don't spend time with people anymore. The more people I spend time with the more often I get people taking offence at what I say.
It's just how it's happened. And... That's why I wanted to be a counsellor. And why I wanted to learn to communicate.
And I can communicate. I've learnt to communicate. But it's... In a professional way I can do it.
Like on the phone. In a call centre. In a job interview.
I'm really good at that stuff. Well, I was. I don't know about now.
But when I'm no longer putting any effort in. Which I don't want to put effort in. I don't think we... What's the point? If you're around someone you always kind of... It's almost like being on an eggshell.
There's an old cliche, isn't it? Like having to tiptoe around and be... Tiptoe around verbally. I don't want to have to do that anymore. I spent my whole life having to do that.
And... When I was a kid I didn't know how to do it. When I was in my twenties I didn't want to do it. I didn't tiptoe around anyone.
And I got into all kinds of problems. And then when I got to my thirties... I... Started to learn. My late twenties actually.
I started to learn how to communicate. I see other people frequently tell me that what I've said is impolite. Even though I think it's polite.
I'm not sure if I think it's polite. I definitely say stuff... Even nowadays dog walkers sometimes they just... They look at me like, why you just... You can't say that. But... Well sometimes they say you shouldn't say that.
But I'm just messing around and it's not serious. Urgh. So I'm going to say slightly agree.
But it would have been definitely agree in the past. But I've even upset people online. In the past so... I'm going to say definitely agree.
I know my family would agree with that. People at the Buddhist Center would agree with that. It's... I don't know the right thing to say to people.
You know? Just sometimes. Sometimes I'm alright but... When I'm... This is the next one. When I'm reading a story I can easily imagine what the characters might look like.
No. No. When I'm reading a story I don't really do the visual side of it.
For me it's more the... The verbal. The... I suppose there might be some visual but... It's like little pictures perhaps every now and then. It's not... It's not the same as watching a movie.
Because I watched... I read... Yeah. I saw Gremlins. Gremlins was one of my favorite movies when I was a kid.
That and The Karate Kid. Probably. I mean... Nothing is ever going to really match The Karate Kid in some ways.
Or Enter The Dragon because of my love that I had for martial arts and karate. But... I remember I watched Gremlins. Loved it.
Brilliant. It's just such a brilliant film. The second one was... Horse... It just wasn't... I mean the second one was funny and stuff but it wasn't... I just didn't kind of get why they went the way they did on the second one.
It was just... Utter chaos. And I understand why the Gremlins and stuff but just... There's something really... Maybe it's quite Christmassy the first one. Because there was snow I suppose.
And... So I watched the film. Loved the film. I read the book and it was a completely different experience.
Because... It... Just to me it was. There was no... I loved the book as well. Because I'd seen the movie first... I could kind of almost picture it a bit.
Had a bit more of a... A little bit of a visual going on. But I didn't need the visual. It's... More about the words and the verbal side.
I think. I think. And... So yeah.
Definitely disagree with that. I can easily imagine what a character might look like. No.
I'm fa... That's partly... I don't... I'm more into... I'm more into... Not text books but... I like to read books about a subject. You know. Whether it's self help.
Whether it's... About... Learning to do something. I can do fiction. But at the same time you know... The fiction is... It's about how good the words are.
How funny. Like Woody Allen for example. His earlier books were so funny.
I found them really funny. And there was no... Even the gags were just... It was just funny. So much of it was verbal.
Okay. Right. This next question... This next question... Now I would have answered no to this... 20 years ago.
Honestly. I'm laughing. Kind of laughing because... I'm just thinking about the last... 6 years.
Nearly 7 years. Blimey. Of me doing these Let Me Bore You To Sleep podcasts.
And whether or not you... How you would answer this on my behalf. Okay. So the next question... Or the next statement and then... There's definitely agree.
Slightly agree. Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree.
Okay. You ready for this? I am fascinated by dates. And that isn't the fruit... Or the romantic experience.
It doesn't say that in there. I am fascinated by dates. Well... I've got a kind of a new person... Came into my life.
This year. Like a new friend or whatever. And she kept pulling me up on it.
That. Because... And someone mentioned it in the podcast. And I seem to mention... It's not dates as in... The 4th of January 1973.
I don't do dates like that. But I definitely have a date mapping thing. So I don't know if that's what they mean.
Or do they mean... By actual particular dates... In history. Because I'm not. However, if you ask me about... November 2023.
Or you ask me about April 1991. No. 1990 rather.
Or January 23rd. I think it was... 1991. 1991.
Or... March 1997. 87 rather. Or August 1988.
I begin the September rather. 1988. Or December 1988.
Or January 1989. Or... I can tell you stuff that happened in my life. In those periods.
So... Am I fascinated by dates? I don't know. Definitely agree. Slightly agree.
Is that fascination? Or is it just mapping? For me it's just mapping. I'm not... I don't find the dates interesting in themselves. It's what's connected to the dates that's interesting.
Or... It's just keeping a track of my life. I'm going to put slightly agree because I'm not going to... I don't know if I should or not. OK.
This is the next one. This might be all of them now. In a social group I can easily keep track of several different people's conversations.
Disagree. Blimey. Definitely disagree.
I really struggle with this. This is one of the things I struggle with. I can't do it.
I can't do it. I have to walk away sometimes. Sometimes I can't walk away because... You know... For example... If it's... When I was at university we used to go out for dinner.
We used to go out in the evening sometimes for drinks and stuff. And they'd all be talking... Over each other. Sometimes.
And... I couldn't follow it. The only conversation I can follow is the one that I'm doing... Talking in. I can listen.
I can. But I can't follow a group talking. I think... An experience I remember... And this was... This is back in... 2000 and... I'm trying to think.
Probably around 2011. No, 2012. Yeah, it was just after I got my diagnosis for bipolar.
And that was December 2011. So 2012... I was in a... And they used to have these... Groups. Which was for the counsellors.
Just to get together and it was... Continuing... Professional... Development. I think it's CPD or something. Continuing professional development.
And we'd all get together. And we'd do like a day. Like a Saturday morning or something.
On a subject. It could be on... Any kinds of things. It could be like a new rule.
A new law that's just come in. It could be... Something to do with first aid maybe. So, you know, whatever it is.
So I went along to this thing. And... We broke up into groups. To talk about what had been discussed.
And there was I think... Five of us. And the other four people... Were literally all talking at the same time. Not... Talking about each other.
But just talking over each other. At the same time. And I got very, very anxious.
To be honest. Very, very. So, in this social group I can easily keep track of... Several different people's conversations.
Definitely disagree. Man, no. That's really... It's awful.
I can't even keep track of someone's conversation... When I'm with them. If there's... If there's other people talking at a table. All I'd want to do is listen to them.
I really... Really have found it difficult in the past. That's a weird noise. OK.
The next one is... I find social situations easy. Let me think. Definitely agree.
Slightly agree. Slightly disagree. Definitely disagree.
Yeah. I find social situations easy. No.
Not one bit. Now... A relative of mine... Recently, when I went to a family gathering. Said to me... Oh, but you're so good.
You're lively and you're talkative. Yeah, but you don't understand. It's... I have to work up to this.
I have to... And he couldn't... It's like, oh, so you don't like being around us? It's like, no, you're not getting it. You don't understand how... It's so hard to explain. It's just really hard.
But... With people I don't know. You know, if I've been to... Probably the worst ones are like weddings. Or funerals are by far the worst.
But that's because it's a funeral, man. You know, it's... I've never been to a good funeral. But... Weddings... I've been to a few weddings that have been big.
For... For recently. Well, in the last... 20 years. 15 years or whatever.
I've been to four big weddings. And... I was actually the bride's groom or whatever. The groom, groomsman.
One of the groomsmen on one of them. And that was my friend. And then I went to my brother's and sister's wedding.
They weren't marrying each other, don't worry. We don't live in Norfolk. Norfolk's brilliant, I'm just joking.
But they do, they do do that. No, they don't. They do.
So... Where else? I... Oh yeah, one of my friends got married as well. And all of those occasions... I had to drink alcohol. And get completely blottoed.
So I had to. I couldn't cope. I just couldn't cope being there.
Just... Really... Really... Just... It was too much. Anyway... Being on a bus... Just... Yeah, I don't even like going into McDonald's anymore. It's just... There was a time I was just... I used to be alright.
I think... Kind of... I don't know. Did I? But yeah, just... Anyway... I tend to notice details that others do not. I would say I definitely agree with that.
I notice things. I notice when someone's had their hair cut. Or they've got a different hairstyle.
Even if I don't see the person very often. I just... I notice things like that. I don't know why.
I don't want to. Because I've got no interest in someone's hairstyle. But... Yeah... I also notice things that have always been there as well.
I notice things like... Wow, have you seen... Remind me, how long has that been there? It's been there for 10 years, Jason. Oh, okay. So yeah, I tend to notice details that others do not.
Yeah, it's usually really pointless stuff. Like, just unnecessary. Almost... Irrelevant to the conversation sometimes.
There's one thing. I remember I had a conversation with this person. And this was a few years ago now.
And she didn't understand why I was listening to her. Because she said something. And then she said it under her breath.
And I answered. And she said... Why are you... Are you listening to me? I said... What do you mean was I listening to you? Do you... I listen to every word everybody says. That's the problem.
I hear everything people say. I'm listening. I don't necessarily want to listen.
But I do. If you're in a conversation with me, I'm listening. Although I find it hard to listen if there's other people in the room.
Because I'm also listening to them. That's when it just gets too hard. But... Yeah, I tend to notice things... Notice details that others do not.
Yeah. I'll just have a look. This next one is just a funny one.
Because... What do you think my answer is going to be for this one? I would rather go to a library than a party. Let me think. I've never once enjoyed a party.
Honestly, even a party that's been thrown for me would just happen once. I didn't even enjoy it. I mean, I love the fact that it was done.
But I didn't enjoy it. Because I just... I didn't like the attention. I didn't like... Yeah, just... The social aspect.
No. I'd rather go to the library than a party. I'd rather do most things than go to a party, to be honest.
So I definitely agree. But libraries are cool. They've got books.
Although... The one in town... It seems to be a place for... People to spend time in during the day. In between... I don't know. It isn't quite the same as other libraries that I've been in.
So... The next one... I find making up stories easy. Yeah. I definitely agree.
I think I can't approve that one. I do. I don't know why.
This is probably the opposite to... This probably goes against what I should be. But I do. I can make up stuff.
Very easily. I do it all the time, don't I? I do it with my recordings. Very regularly.
I find myself drawn more strongly to people than to things. Definitely disagree. The only people I find myself drawn to generally are the ones that I'm attracted to.
Or I'm very interested in. And that doesn't happen very often. Next one... I tend to have very strong interests.
Which I get upset about if I can't pursue. Definitely agree. There's no two ways about that one.
Yeah. I enjoy social chit-chat. You know, sometimes I do.
Sometimes I don't. Generally I don't. But I'm not going to put definitely disagree.
Because... Occasionally... Provided it's not in a social place with lots of people. If it's just like... What's your dog's name? It's Vinnie! Alright, see ya. I'm okay with that.
I don't know what to say to people. With Vinnie, there's a focus. Now, if I was walking through the park on my own... And people were stopping... Well, I wouldn't stop.
I wouldn't talk. But unless I knew them to say hello to. So, unless there's an actual reason for a conversation, there's no point.
Which I guess, social chit-chat is a conversation without a reason. It's like a pointless conversation. And even though I'm talking to people, other dog owners... Dog walkers... There's a reason for the conversation because we both have dogs.
And it's a commonality. So, it doesn't really feel like chit-chat. There's a purpose for it.
There's a reason. Yeah. So, I'm going to put... I slightly disagree because I do have chit-chat.
But it's because of Vinnie. Apart from those that I actually like. And then it isn't chit-chat.
I've had quite serious conversations with dog walkers. So, yeah. When I talk, it isn't always easy for others to get a word in edgeways.
Yeah. See, you're not going to know this. Because... Those listening... Because you've... Probably none of you have actually had a conversation with me.
But I... The reason why I do monologues... Which I guess this is what this is. A monologue. It's me talking.
It's because... It's not just that I love the sound of my own voice. Because I don't particularly like the sound of my own voice. I think I've got an okay voice.
People told me that I've got a nice voice. But... Nice and soothing and boring. Nice and boring.
I don't want to be boring. Do you ever notice that? Have you ever thought... Well, not notice it. Have you ever thought that maybe I don't want to be boring? I'd like to be thought of as exciting.
And... You know, I don't... I don't... That... You know, if I... If I met someone... And they came on a date with me. And they went home. And spoke to their friends.
And... Like, oh, he's so boring. That would not be a good thing to be talked about. Like, to... Like... She wouldn't want another date, would she? He was so boring.
In this environment, yeah. Being boring is good. Because that's the name of the podcast.
It's not... I know it's not called being boring is good. But Let Me Bore You To Sleep. So when I talk, it isn't always easy for others to get a word in edgeways.
I definitely agree. It's not easy. However... However... I can switch... Into... Listening mode.
I do have listening mode. Which is... My counselling mode. Where... I will listen.
I will sit there. And I have to turn my brain off a little bit to do it. And I will just sit and listen.
And... Look. And, you know. But in a normal conversation, I don't really want to do that.
I just want to talk. And... That's the whole thing. I think I was talking about this yesterday or to someone.
That... Part of the reason why I don't like to watch TV with people is... Because I talk too much. And it messes it up for me. If someone's sitting here, I will talk.
They'll talk and annoy me if they're talking. Because they're interrupting the show. But guaranteed, I'll talk more than they do.
And I'll interrupt the film or whatever I'm watching myself. I did it with my friend downstairs. He'd come up here.
We'd watch boxing. I didn't even see after boxing because I was talking to him. So... I can be... And it's not even... I'm... Necessarily talking particularly fast.
Although I can talk fast. Sometimes I trip over my own words but... It's... If I just talk at my normal speed... There's a chance that their eyes will glaze over. And I... I can kind of... Sometimes tell if they're wanting... I don't know.
Just doesn't... I do wonder if... Whether or not they're... Wanting to talk to me. So... Okay. This next one.
I'm fascinated by numbers. Definitely disagree. Move on.
I don't like numbers. I don't dislike numbers but... I've never been fascinated by numbers. At all.
Zero. There's no... Mathematics was not my thing. And... Some may say... Well what about the stats then JJ? What about the statistics that you're obsessed with? Okay.
I'm interested in those numbers. I'm interested in how many people listen. I'm interested in how many people from each country listen.
I'm interested in how many people watch the videos. I'm interested in the age groups of the people who watch the videos. And who listen.
Just... I'm interested in those statistics just to get an idea... Of who my audience is. That's all. Obsessed? But... Fascinated? I am fascinated by the stats.
But I'm not fascinated by numbers. In general. So I'm going to put... So I put slightly disagree with that.
Because I am... I am fascinated by the stats. But not by numbers. Just numbers.
Numbers just for the sake of it. I'm not interested in anything just for the sake of it. I don't think.
I'm going to put definitely disagree. Because I don't think that stats comes under the category of numbers. Although it is numbers isn't it? And I do number all my recordings.
And I do know how many podcast downloads I've had. Since I started. I do know how many years I've been doing it.
That comes under the dates really doesn't it? I'm going to put slightly disagree. OK. So... Just give me a little bit edge ways.
But I don't think I'm interested in numbers at all. But maybe I am a little bit when it comes to statistics. The next one is... When I'm reading a story.
I find it difficult to work out the characters intentions. It depends doesn't it? It depends how it's written. It depends how it's written.
Because some people they've written. You know what the characters intentions are. Because they're telling you.
But if they don't tell you the characters intentions. How are you supposed to know? You know because that's the good thing about books. Is you get to find out what the character is thinking.
You don't get that in a movie. Unless it's you know some kind of narrative. Going on you know in the movie.
Like they were there you know they're talking. Like inside. Or talking actually at the camera.
Which is done in a few movies. I find it difficult to work out their characters intentions. Unless it's obvious.
Unless they're actually stating it verbally. Then yeah I don't know what the characters intentions are. How would I know? There's no way of knowing is there? Unless it's blatant.
I mean you know if someone comes at someone. Yeah it's. Okay if someone's chucking pebbles up a window.
And you see that they're holding a rose. And they're playing romantic music. And they're singing reading a poem a love poem.
Then clearly they're they're asking. To use a toilet. I mean obviously that's what.
Clearly it's a romantic gesture isn't it? I can tell that. But it has to be blatant. It has to be.
Just guessing. And I think that's where the problem is with some people. In society is.
They guess. The amount of people I've met that think they can mind read. When they can't.
No one can. We can't mind read. I don't know what anyone else is thinking.
Or what anyone else's intentions are. Unless they tell me. And even then.
They might be lying. So you know. The amount of times I used to read.
Not read. Hear people say. Well I can read you like a book.
No you can't. It's a very silly thing to say. I understand if someone's got a kid.
And they've grown up with a kid. And they've watched the kid. You know.
Develop from being a baby. All the way to. Twenties or whatever.
And. There's certain behavior that can be predicted. You know.
So it's like with him. With Vinnie. I can predict some of his behavior.
Like he's. I know when he's. Going to do a poo.
And I don't mean he crouches down. Squats. I mean.
Just I sometimes get that. Okay. He wants to do a poo.
Because of what he's doing. Or. He's heard something.
Ask his ear flaps. If. It's a bit more obvious with him.
I don't particularly enjoy reading a fiction. I already mentioned that earlier. So I definitely agree with that.
I don't. I don't read fiction at all now. There's a few fiction things.
I like that I've read. But they're not. Fiction.
They are. But it's very verbal. It's very just.
Describing. How they're thinking. Or what they're thinking about.
I don't particularly enjoy reading fiction. I find. I find it hard to make new friends.
Yeah. I agree. Definitely agree.
I can. I'm friendly to everyone. But I don't make friends.
Generally. I don't. Just don't.
I don't. Don't. No.
I don't. That's it. Simple.
I find it hard to make new friends. Definitely agree. I notice patterns in things all the time.
Kind of. That goes. That goes.
That's already been kind of mentioned. Isn't it? The whole. You mentioned.
You're noticing things. I notice patterns. But it's.
I imagine. Well. I'd have thought.
Maybe one would. But. There's patterns in people's behavior.
But it's. All the time. No.
All the time. No. Not all the time.
I know. I notice patterns in things all the time. I slightly agree with that one.
It's not all the time. I used to be a bit more like that. When I was more socially active.
By that I mean. I used to go out. Notice patterns.
Like a certain thing. Fridays. There's always more.
Police sirens on a Friday. Than any other day of the week. Not really sure why.
Why would it. Why would a Friday be like that. And no other day.
There's. Yeah. Patterns of behavior.
Human behavior. I notice that with the neighbors. And with people I know.
It's definitely. Certain. Patterns there.
But that's because. I guess I'm interested in. In psychology and stuff.
I suppose. So I put slightly. Slightly agree.
It's not definite on that one. I would have said. Definitely agree.
20 years ago. I would rather go. To the theater.
Than a museum. I'd love to say yes. Or what I'd love to put.
Definitely agree. But no. Definitely disagree.
I'd love to be. A theater person. But.
Unless I can have the theater to myself. Yeah. So no.
I'd rather go to a museum. But an empty museum. I don't want to go to a busy one.
It does not upset me. If my daily. Oh dear.
It does not upset me. If my daily routine. Is disturbed.
Definitely disagree. You know what. When I get someone knock at the door.
Sometimes I get so angry. Because I'm doing something. And if someone's going to come around.
I can't relax until I've gone. Literally until I've been. And then gone again.
Because I just don't know. When I'm going to be interrupted. So if I start on my coursework.
If I start on a podcast. If I start watching a movie. Am I going to be interrupted.
And once I'm interrupted. I have to. Get myself back into that mode.
So if I'm watching a movie. I don't. Want to be disrupted.
If I'm reading something. Or doing. Something online.
Or whatever it is I'm doing. I don't. That's a routine.
One of my daily routines. I don't like it. Until the one I work.
Oh man. If I. It's happened before. Not recently.
To be fair. But I'd wake up. Get up.
And do my normal morning routine. And I'd have my breakfast. And I wouldn't eat it yet.
I'd have it. And it'd be on the table here. And I'd put the TV on.
Have a cup of tea. Ready to have my breakfast. And someone would knock on the door.
That is the. Worst possible time. To knock on my door.
When I'm about to have my breakfast. Because first of all. I haven't eaten yet.
Secondly. I don't like eating when I'm around people. Actually not only do I not like.
I don't do it. I do not eat. With other people.
Generally. Occasionally I will share a pizza. That has happened.
It's not like it never happens. I like. It's not a case that I'm a messy eater.
Although I am. Sometimes. I just like to be on my own when I eat.
It's not. A weird thing. It's just.
I don't mind this little fella being with me. He can be with me all the time. Whenever he wants.
I'm happy for him to be with me. But I like that time on my own. That's my time.
And. It's part of my routine. And getting it.
Disturbed. It. Yeah it does upset me.
I'm not proud of it. I think it's a bit ridiculous that it upsets me. But it does.
And my Nan would be so. Annoyed with me for saying that. Because she always said to me like.
You know. People are more important than telly. People are more.
Your. You know. Even when I stopped drinking.
She said. We still need to go to the pub. Still need to meet people.
Still need to have a social life. Just because you're not drinking anymore. I was like.
Yeah yeah. But. The only way I could be in a social situation.
Was drinking. I couldn't. Couldn't do it.
I struggled. I didn't struggle so much with a comedy club though. Because that was part of my.
That was my obsession. Comedy. So going to a comedy club was part of my obsession.
So. But I didn't like to be in the audience. I liked to sit at the back.
Or stand at the back. Because most comedy clubs I didn't pay to get into. I just.
Because they knew me. So I'd go in. Sit at the back.
And watch. Or sit at the. Sometimes stand at the side and watch.
And. Although the comedy store didn't know me. So I paid a few times to get in.
To see a show there. With those like a big comedian on. But.
I did perform once there. And another time. I called up.
What's his name? Mark. Thomas. Yeah Mark Thomas.
I phoned him up. And he put me on. As a guest.
So I got in for free. Like a comp. And.
He. I absolutely loved that man. I wanted to be like him so much.
And I was nothing like him. It's really weird. His comedy.
His. Style. His personality.
His. Performance. Everything about him.
Was just perfect. To me. You know.
He'd literally go on stage. Chat for a few minutes. And say.
Don't worry. I've not started yet. Like.
I'm. I'm much. You know.
Like. I've not started the comedy yet. I'll start in a minute.
And he'd kind of like. If the audience weren't laughing. To start with.
He'd say. It's fine. I'm really good at this.
Don't worry. You know. Usually they would be laughing anyway.
You know. I've not actually started yet. So don't worry.
It's just like. I tried that once. Didn't work.
Someone said. Yes. You've been on stage for nine minutes.
You have started. And it wasn't funny. Okay.
And. I'll shout out. Thanks mom.
And that would actually get a laugh. It does not upset me. If my daily routine is disturbed.
Definitely disagree. I frequently find that I don't know. How to keep a conversation going.
Wow. Definitely agree. Unless.
It's someone I know. Very very well. Or it's a subject.
That I. I'm really interested in. So there's a dog walker. That's into martial arts.
And we talk about that. There's another dog walker. We worked at a petrol station as well.
He's into boxing. Me and him talk about that. Every time we see each other.
And there's no end of talking. There's no end of a conversation. Because.
Boxing is my favourite thing. Pretty much. And it's his favourite thing.
He loves football as well. But boxing is. And I'm his boxing chatty pal.
That's what it is. I got his telephone number. But I never phone him.
Because we just see each other. And we have a good old chin wag. About boxing.
But I can't. The amount of times I've been talking to someone. And I've just stopped talking.
This is in the past. Actually it's not that long ago. Recently as well.
And I've been talking to them. And I just dry up. I'm like.
I don't know what else to say. I've got. It's partly.
I'm not interested in anything you're saying. I'm not interested. In anything that I've got to say about the subject.
Not interested in the subject we're talking about. And. I don't say that out loud.
But it's kind of. I don't really know what else. Can't really contribute to this.
Because. I don't know. It's weird.
In real life. On the phone. I could do it.
Because there was a purpose. I was trying to sell car insurance. I could keep the conversation going for a whole hour.
With the single purpose of selling car insurance. I could do that. I did it for years.
But. Outside of that environment. It was weird.
Because I'd do that on the phone. And then I'd see a colleague. Someone that I've worked with.
Like on a different table. And I wouldn't know what to say to them. Even though everybody knew who I was.
In the department. Because my name was on the board. I was always like in the top five.
Sellers. For. At least a year and a half.
When I was at Churchill. Maybe top ten. But generally.
Sometimes at the top. Sometimes two. Sometimes number three.
So people knew who I was. And everyone like acknowledged me. There was about 200.
Maybe 200. 250 people working there. 200 maybe.
And they knew who I was. It's not like they didn't know who I was as a person. But they knew who I was.
Because I was. One of the sellers. And.
The top seller. Who I was a bit in awe of. He was better than me.
Sometimes I'd beat him in the week. But he was ultimately. What happened is.
My friend. Who was in my group. He.
He got the most sales. In one week. That anyone's ever got.
So I think. Two weeks later. I beat his.
So he's in my team. But I beat him. By about five.
I can't remember the numbers now. But I got the most sales. That anybody's ever got.
In the company. Like in. Well in that department.
In that branch. I don't know. Because Churchill was a huge company.
So I broke the record. Now. The other one.
Who was a top seller. Completely annihilated. Mine.
Like. He got like 20 more. 20 more sales.
Than me. In that week. It's like completely.
Jody's name was. It was so good. And.
I kept my record for a week. Seriously. It was ridiculous.
The problem is. Whenever. Like.
You'd win. I don't know if it was the month. Or I think it was the month.
Or you'd win a. They give you a chair. And all these decorations. Above your desk.
Or whatever. The thing is. The chair wasn't comfortable.
I didn't like it. And I was like. Can I just.
Can I just go back. To having the other chair. That I normally sit in.
Because I like to keep the same chair. I actually marked it. So I knew which one it was.
As you said. They said. No.
But you've got the throne. Because there was all sparkle. Around.
I said no. But I like my chair. So.
Anyway. The. What was the point of that.
Oh yeah. I struggled to talk to Jody. I got to know him a bit better.
Because we worked at a different company together as well. Because I was. Maybe because I was in awe of him.
Because he was the top sales person. But. I just didn't know how to talk to people.
Outside of. And this is a reason for it. I found it difficult.
There needs to be a purpose. The. Yeah.
I mean I noticed that. With the. When I was.
New Year's Eve at the comedy club. That I was at. I think three or four years in a row.
New Year's Eve. Or three years at least. Actually I went to New Year's Eve.
Probably about. 10 times out of a 12 year period. And come New Year's.
Everyone's like hugging each other. And I just hide. Because I don't know how to.
That doesn't feel comfortable for me. And sometimes I'd go upstairs. And just keep out of the way.
Until it was all done. And then I'd come down afterwards. And people would say.
Where you been? I said oh just diarrhea. I didn't want to embarrass myself. You know.
And. So. I think.
I still remember years ago. I was talking to. What was his name? It was my manager.
One of my jobs. It's like the boss. Lovely bloke.
And. I remember just standing there. Talking to him.
And my eyes glazed over. Because my mind. My whole mind just froze.
And like. I don't know what to say now. See now.
I would say it out loud. Don't know what to say now. Because it's funny.
Well I find it funny. And. I will actually say that to people.
I've run out of things to say. Run out of words. If I'm in a rude mood.
I'll say I'm bored now. But that's with people that I'm. Friends with.
I wouldn't say that to someone I didn't know. And. But I'd do it in a jokey way.
It might be true. But I would do it in a jokey way. I'm.
Actually not always. I'll try to. I don't.
I don't want to be rude to people. I don't like to be rude. Or do I? No I don't.
I don't. If it's funny. But.
How to put everyone off you in one recording. This is me. That's what I've done today.
Probably. So I frequently find that. I don't know how to keep a conversation going.
Definitely agree. In a like a real life situation. And the last time I had a proper conversation.
With my dad. Was. Probably.
Nineteen. Eighty eight. Like an actual full on.
Heart to heart. Conversation. I mean.
It was over a bottle of. Scotch. So.
I think that lubricated his. His lips a little bit. Sounds weird.
But you know I mean. He was chatty. He's a chatty person like me.
But just not with me. And I'm not particularly chatty with him. It's a strange.
Dynamic. Don't really know. Why.
I just think they. I think they find me annoying. I think that's what it is.
Maybe I'm just really annoying. And. Okay.
So. I find it easy to read between the lines. When someone is talking to me.
I don't know what. I can't read people. I don't know.
That's why it's really hard to trust anyone. Because I don't know what their intentions are. I really don't.
I mean one of the good things about my friend downstairs. Luke that's not here anymore. It just be blatant.
He's blatant. There was no. I think he tried to be a bit.
Sneaky to start with when we first met. But then he realized that didn't work for me. And he just.
Because I don't I can't. You know I can't read between the lines. Sometimes.
Sometimes I can. I mean. If I'm around someone I get to know them really really well.
Like with him. I could learn. I can't have noticed certain things that he did.
And he didn't mean it when he said it. Or he was trying to get me to. Offer him help without asking for help.
But that was. I mean you know we were very close. The closest.
Pretty much. Friendship I've ever had. Because we.
Saw each other. Nine years. We saw each other like nearly every day.
Sometimes multiple times a day. So we. Yeah.
It's probably the. I'd say it's not. Not a close.
Just the closest friendship. Close relationship. I've ever had.
Like. Emotionally closest. More than any girlfriend.
More than any family member. Is. I didn't feel.
There wasn't a romantic relationship at all. And. But I couldn't have been closer to him if.
If he was my own brother. You know. It's.
And I don't have. Really that kind of relationship with my brothers. I mean I've.
I love my little brother but I don't think he likes me particularly. So. Yeah.
And my nan. Different relationship but. I didn't.
I didn't spend a huge amount of time with her. I spent huge amounts of time with him. Like my friend.
You know. Was in and out of each other's flats constantly. We walked.
Used to go out every day. Like for walks and take. Well the first.
The first. We used to take the two ferrets out. Because he had a ferret and I had Andre.
And then he got a dog. So we used to take the dog out. And then.
I got this one. So we used to take both the dogs out. So we always had like reasons to go out and.
And. Yeah. I got to know him but.
Read in between the lines. I need people just to be honest. Like what.
What is it you want. I mean I'll give you an example. I might have mentioned this the other day and.
And I didn't mean it rudely. Generally didn't. But.
One of my friends phoned up. And I said. You all right then.
You OK. And she was being nice to me. But she was being super nice.
Like buttering me up. And like OK. There's no reason to ever butter me up.
Unless you're going to eat me. I just I don't need that. I just.
Flattery. Means nothing to me. Really.
I like honest. So. I would never want anyone to say.
Oh. I love what you do. I love your recordings.
If it's not true. I only say if it's true. If it's not true.
It means it's just pointless. There's no point. And flattery.
Like. Come on. Yeah.
You ever get that when you. I did it. I think I. Might.
Trimmed my beard. I had a haircut. And a friend of mine said.
Oh you look 10 years younger. Like shut up. It's not true is it.
And she laughed. I said like it's not true. Why are you saying that when it's not true.
Look 10 years younger. I don't look 10 years younger. So I had my haircut.
What. What if I would trim my beard. Well never 10 years.
Well I'd wear some clothes. Change every item of clothing. I end up.
Well I look five years older like. Come on. Don't be so silly.
Yeah. I think some people just like giving compliments. Which maybe I should learn.
From that. Maybe compliments is a good thing. I just don't see the point.
Unless I mean it. So. Another thing.
I had this friend. When I was at university. Very close.
We were. And. Pretty much my best friend.
At the time. Without her. I would not have got my degree.
100 percent. Without her. Without her support.
I would not have. My first. Degree.
Which is. I think a little bit why. Maybe struggling.
A bit. With the. The new.
The new degree I'm doing. Because I've. Got no one to.
Got no. Sort of support. Like who's also doing the course.
You know. But. That might change.
Over time. So. We went out.
Me. And probably. Four other people.
From the. Course. And one of the other people.
I think like. Three of the. It was all women.
Not that that really makes any difference. But they were all going on about. How.
Wonderful. My friend looked. Oh you look.
So good. Your dress is so lovely. Oh your hair is so nice.
Because she made herself up. Before going out and everything. And it might have been for.
Like a special occasion. Maybe the. End of course.
You know. We'd finished our degree course. And we were going out.
And they were all like. Oh. And.
I'm just sitting there thinking. What are you doing. And one of them said to me.
Doesn't she look lovely. And the other. Everyone else.
Looked at me. Waiting for me to answer. Except my friend.
Because she was just smiling. And I said. I don't care how she looks.
She's my friend. I don't care. What she looks like.
I've got no interest. And they couldn't understand it. And I. Was I being rude.
I wasn't being rude. But I think they might have took it as being rude. But I don't think my friend did.
But then I don't know. It's hard to tell. I mean she often poured beer over my head.
So I don't know if that was the reason. I find it easy to read between the lines. When someone is talking to me.
No. Definitely disagree with that. The next one.
These have got to be coming to an end soon. Surely. It said 15 minutes.
I've been talking for an hour and 25 minutes. I usually concentrate more on the whole picture. Rather than the small details.
I don't know how to answer that one. I'll be honest with you. I'm really not really sure what that means.
I usually concentrate more on the whole picture. Rather than the small details. I'd say probably not.
You can't have the whole picture without the details. If anything I'll probably get stuck on the details. I'm trying to think of a context for that.
What do I do. I'm not making a podcast. Do I focus on the whole thing.
Rather than the small details. No. I focus on the small details.
Each individual thing that needs to be done. Make it a recording. Editing the recording.
Processing the recording. Getting an image. Creating an image.
For the recording. Making a video on YouTube. From the recording.
Yes. I think it's details. I definitely disagree then.
I usually concentrate. No. I do disagree.
I'm not a very. I'm not. I am not very good at remembering phone numbers.
Definitely agree. I don't remember. Who does? Who needs to? Although.
I do remember two. There's a friend I used to have. He stopped being my friend.
Do you want to know why? When. Robin Williams passed away. There was a thing on you.
On Facebook. Where people were posting his picture as their profile. And I just followed.
I was just following the crowd. Having been. A huge fan of Robin Williams when I was younger.
I grew up watching him. On Mork and Mindy. And.
I. I even loved him in Popeye. You know. I wasn't one of the older people.
That like. Then leveled him. When he was doing.
Not from Aladdin. And stuff like that. No.
Early. Early days. And also.
When I got into. Stand up. You know.
He was the first person I went to. Like to watch and stuff. So anyway.
I posted his picture. My friend. As my profile picture.
It's only temporary. It was as a. Tribute to him. And my friend told me.
I was. Sick. In the head for doing that.
I found that a little bit rude. So I. I said. I don't think you.
See you correct. I can ask people on Facebook. What they think.
And he said. I can't ask them. So I did.
And maybe he didn't like the way. I'd worded it. But I wasn't supposed to be rude to him.
But I just. Told the truth. I said my.
My friend said. I'm sick in the head. For posting.
A picture of. Robin Williams. As my profile picture.
As a tribute to him. Like many other people. On Facebook.
What do you think? Do you think I'm sick in the head. For doing this? Now weirdly enough. I got quite a few.
Replies to that. And. None of them agreed.
With my friend. He read those comments. And.
Never spoke to me again. Like. It was his idea for me.
To ask people. I don't know. Anyway.
That was. I don't know yet. I remember his telephone number.
Even now. It's etched in my brain. Because I phoned it so many times.
In the 80s. And the 90s. I was friends with him for a long time.
Silly thing to fall out over. Another thing he didn't like is. My recordings.
When I used to talk. And. I used to do these recordings.
Long before I started doing these recordings. So. They Let Me Bore You To Sleep.
I didn't start till. 2018. I think it was February.
2018. But I'd already done this style of stuff. Many years ago.
I think the first ones were the. I used to call them. Hypnotic buffet.
This was. 2011. Probably.
So around 2011. 12. 13.
I was doing stuff like this. During that period. I just had different names for them.
Thinking out loudly. Or think. Thinking out loudly was one.
Or thinking out quietly. Thinking out quietly. Thinking out quietly.
I don't know. But there was. I had different.
Different names for them. And he said that I was ill. He thought I was ill.
Because of the rambling. And the. The nonsensical.
Kind of. Maybe because it wasn't. As structured as he'd like it to have been.
I don't know. And that's why I advise anyone that knows me. Not to listen to my recordings.
So yeah. I think he. It's almost like he lost.
Respect for me. Which surprised me. Because I didn't think he had any respect for me.
To start with. I don't need people to respect me. I'm not very good at remembering phone numbers.
Definitely disagree. I definitely agree. I'm not very good at remembering numbers.
But I remember his number. And I remember my dad's landline telephone number. The only two numbers I remember.
I don't know what my own number is. OK. I don't usually notice small changes.
In a situation or a person's appearance. See. I do notice.
I just don't care. So. I had a neighbour yesterday.
I said. Have you had your hair cut? He said. Yeah.
I said. Oh. Cool.
I just. I do notice small things. But generally.
I'm not interested in the small things. Necessarily. But I do notice.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
I do notice small things. Changes in a situation. A person's appearance.
Yeah. If someone's wearing something different. To what they normally do.
Because I get to know people. Especially with my eyesight. It's quite good.
So. I know people by what they're wearing. And.
What kind of dog they've got. So. Someone's got two dogs.
They've got a different dog. Or they're wearing a hat. Or whatever.
It's like. It throws me off a bit. Especially this time of the year.
Because I've had months. Where it's not really. Had much rain.
And now everyone's covered up. With raincoats. And rainmacks.
And stuff. And I don't know who they are anymore now. But before.
I always. I was wearing the same jackets. Same coloured jackets.
And. The way they walk. I could always tell my friend.
By the way he walks. Well. The way he used to walk.
Rather. And. Because he had long legs.
Long legs. Tiny body. No.
He had a normal body as well. He had long legs. I don't.
I don't. I usually don't notice small changes. Etc.
Or personal appearance. I'm going to go slightly disagree. Because I notice.
But I don't care. You know. I know how to tell.
If someone listening to me. Is getting bored. Oh dear.
I'm going to put slightly disagree. Because I've started to learn. A little bit.
Because. I guess I'm starting to just. Expect that people are bored.
Slightly disagree. I can't necessarily tell. But sometimes.
I think I can. Never used to be able to. No.
I know I didn't. But. It's a bit of a strange one.
I find it easy. To do more than one thing at once. Definitely disagree.
I'm not even going to. Give that any more energy. Than it needs.
Can I do one thing at a time. Yeah. I try and do more than one thing at a time.
Sometimes. Like. Let's say I've got the laptop.
And I've got the iPad. And I've got two things going on at the same time. It just.
Is hard. It's painful. So I have to stop.
So I'm just like no. I'm just going to stick to the one thing. Even if it means waiting around.
I'll just do that. This next question. I hope the question is coming to an end soon.
Because it's taking forever. When I talk on the phone. I'm not sure when it's my turn to speak.
You know. The phone is a different thing. It's a little bit harder now.
Because I'm not used to using the phone. And I've kind of. Gone a little back to.
I've had that a few times. When I've been speaking over the other person. It's not as easy.
There was a time when I was really good on the phone. But that's what I was doing all day. Every day.
For years. So now. I'll put slightly agree.
Because. My telephone manner. Isn't so good now.
As it was. I'm still friendly on the phone. I'm still nice.
And it's fairly easy. Not as easy as it used to be. To talk to people on the phone.
But there's not a lot. Yeah. I do have a tendency of talking over people.
I try not to. But. Yeah.
It's hard. I enjoy doing things spontaneously. Yeah.
I do. I like to have the freedom. To do what I want.
When I want. But there's a lot of limits to that anyway. So I can't really do what I want.
When I want. All the time. But it's nice to have some kind of structure.
Doing things spontaneously. Slightly disagree. Because.
I have done some spontaneous things. In fact. Probably.
There are times. If I'm in a bit of a. Upper mood where I would do. Be very spontaneous.
And it's. Hasn't always worked out very well. But I'm trying to base it on.
Like a normal kind of. A normal period. A normal kind of mood period.
I'm often the last. To understand the point of a joke. You know.
Weirdly enough. That is sometimes true. I'm not always the quickest.
When someone's told a joke. But I'm. Arguably.
A little bit of a joker myself. Verbally at least. But I don't always understand.
When someone else is doing a joke. Because. It just goes back to.
Not really knowing someone's. Motivation. Or what is their intention.
Yeah. I'm a little bit slow. Sometimes.
I'll put slightly agree. Not definitely. It's not always a time.
All the time. But it has happened a lot. I find it easy to work out.
What someone is thinking or feeling. Just by looking at their face. Yeah sure.
Definitely disagree. I don't know. The amount of people that say one thing.
And they've got a different expression. On their face. But.
It's no way of knowing. I've said to people in the past. Are you upset with me? They said no.
Tell me your face. It's like. I don't know.
Just by looking at their face. No. Sometimes.
It's not easy though. Sometimes. It's very obvious isn't it.
Someone's like angry or. Delightfully happy. You can see it.
But it's not usually just the face. Because. Someone's happy.
They're normally floating around like a butterfly. If. If there is an interruption.
I can switch back to what I was doing. Very quickly. No.
I do struggle with that. I slightly disagree. OK.
I can get back into it. But it takes a little bit of doing. Sometimes I forget what I was doing.
I get interrupted. And I get sidetracked. And.
I move into a different. It's almost like I get my. My rail tracks onto a different rail.
My tracks onto a different rail. It goes in a new direction. That's why I don't like interruptions.
I am good at social chit chat. But. It's definitely.
Yeah. I'm not really very good at it. It's just chit chat.
Not. No. It bores me.
I don't see the point in it. Generally. Unless it's a reason for it.
I like. There has to be a reason for a conversation. That's what I. OK.
For me. I mean I've been told in the past. That I can be too serious.
Why are you talking about a serious subject. This is a party. I was like OK.
What else am I supposed to talk about. So. People often tell me that I. Keep going on and on about the same thing.
Yeah. I do have a tendency of doing that. I learned not to.
But didn't stop me wanting to. Does that make sense. I only want to talk about what I want to talk about.
Whatever I'm interested in. And. Yeah.
I do have a tendency of going on. I mean you can answer that. You listen to my podcast.
Do I have a tendency of going on a bit. And. Yeah.
Definitely agree with that one. I do. People don't say so much to me to my face anyway.
But then I don't have much activity or much contact with humans anymore. I used to get. Yeah.
People used to mention that a fair bit when I was younger. I think I think people used to avoid me sometimes. Because of it.
When I was young. When I was young. I never needed anyone.
When I was young. I used to enjoy playing games involving pretending with other children. Yeah I did.
Actually. Yeah. Did I enjoy playing games with other kids.
Not really. Just generally. But friends.
Slightly agree. Not definitely. Because I didn't really have many friends.
And. But. You know as a time when I. I mean I worked in it.
Yeah. I was a kid. I had worked in a detective agency.
But wasn't really a detective. It was a pretend detective agency. They weren't real guns.
We were shooting each other with. Me to be fair. If you was in a detective agency you probably wouldn't be shooting each other.
Would you. And. There was a time when I used to.
I don't know if I. I don't know if it was pretend though. To me I think it was real. You know when I used to believe I had superpowers.
And I could walk through walls. And. I could become invisible.
And I could fly. And. All those things.
I actually believed it. I believed I could change the weather. I believed it.
It wasn't like make-believe. I actually believed it. But anyway.
I'll just leave that as slightly agree. I. I like to collect information about categories of things. For example.
Types of cars. Birds. Trains.
Type of plant. Not that kind of stuff. But.
I am interested in. Maybe for me one of my big things. As far as information goes.
Would be. Boxing. I like to look at.
The backgrounds. The fights. You know of different boxers.
And. Yeah. That's probably the only thing I really.
Collect these days. It's more boxing. Do a lot of information about boxers.
But not lots of different things. Just the one. Just boxing.
Or whatever I'm interested in at the time. Used to be. Websites.
Used to be martial arts. Used to be comedy. I mean I was.
Studying comedy for years. I'm never any good at it though. So I'm going to put.
Slightly agree. Because I don't. It's not for everything.
I find it difficult to measure what it would be like. To be someone else. How.
How would you. How could you. How could you.
How is it even possible to imagine being someone else. Can anyone do that. I mean come on.
Definitely agree. I find it difficult to imagine what it would be like. To be someone else.
How could anyone. How could you imagine what it's like. To be another person.
I'm just trying to think. How. This doesn't seem possible.
I like to plan. I like to plan any activities. I participate in carefully.
Yeah. I do. I like to plan things.
I like to. Anything that I'm involved in. I like to know.
Yeah. If we're going somewhere. Like.
I don't have done anything social for a long time. But. I like to know where we're going.
What time we're going there. What time. You know.
Just like the logistics. Like how we're going to get home. How much it's going to cost.
What do we need to wear. You know. Lots of different things.
So. Yeah. I like to plan.
I like to know what's happening in advance. Yeah. I agree with that.
I enjoy social occasions. Definitely disagree. Move on.
It doesn't say that. It just says I enjoy social occasions. No.
I don't. I find it difficult to work out people's intentions. Definitely agree.
I don't have a clue what people's. I mean. I think over time.
If someone's just ripping you off. And continuously. Asking for stuff and gives nothing back.
And it's just. You know. And lying.
Potentially. Then yeah. Eventually.
It's like. Okay. That person's intentions.
It's not a good intention. So. Let's keep away from them.
But. It's hard. It's hard to know.
And I struggle to say no to people. That's the problem. So.
I find it difficult to work out people's intentions. Definitely agree. New situations make me anxious.
Definitely agree. Blimey. I enjoy meeting new people.
Definitely disagree. I am a good diplomat. I am.
I agree. I am a good diplomat. I'm a peacekeeper.
I would do. Everything I can. To keep the peace between people that are.
In conflict. To try and keep the peace with the neighbours. And.
Yeah. Very. I'm a good diplomat.
I would say. Now I might not understand the word diplomat. So.
I might have got that wrong. But I think I have understood it. And the next question.
I am not very good at remembering people's date of birth. There's only. Only people's date of births I know.
Is my brother's and my dad's. That's it. And mine.
That is it. No. And my friend who's not here anymore.
So. But that was more because. I used to do a lot of phone calls.
I knew his date of birth. I used to keep the details off by heart. Because I had to keep giving them over the phone.
He'd be with me when I was doing it. Stop kicking me Vinnie. But he.
Yeah I knew his date of birth. But other than that. My three brothers.
And my dad. Those dates of births are etched in my brain. Also.
I'm just trying to think. I think my dad had the same date of birth as my friend. So maybe that's.
Well. Date of the. Date and month.
Not year. Anyway. No.
I'm not sure. So. Not really.
I don't know anyone else's date of birth. So. I'm very good.
I'm not very good. So I say definitely agree. I'm not very good.
Because the ones I've got. It's not hard to. It's not hard to remember something.
That you've known. Since she was. Could first read and write.
And speak. You know I learnt my brother's dates of birth. I made that weird noise again.
I made my. I learnt my brother's date of birth. Both.
All three of them. The first two. Bearing in mind.
One is. Exactly one week before mine. The other one is.
The month after mine. And the younger one. Is the day before mine.
So. Them two are very easy to remember. The one.
One week exactly before mine. One. Is one day.
Before mine. You know. And then.
My dad's. Is the same date. As my brother's.
But it's a different month. So. You know.
They're easy to remember. But. Anyone else's date of birth.
My step mum. Is one of two different dates. It's either the 13th.
Or the 16th. Or the 19th. Of that month.
I find it very easy to play games. Does anyone remember telephone number. Dates of birth.
Isn't that. Isn't that the same as. Telephone numbers.
Dates of birth. They're kind of. Just.
Why would you remember it. I find it very easy to play games. With children that involve pretending.
I'm not even sure about that. To be honest. And.
I mean I used to be. I used to have some goddaughters. And they'd be like playing.
Having cups of tea and stuff. And. I found it a bit boring.
To be honest. A bit pointless. And I don't know what I was like.
When I was a kid. But. I can go along with pretend.
I don't mind. Yeah. I find it very.
I'm going to say slightly agree. Because I'm kind of a little bit. In between that one.
Right. Take the autism test online now. Ready to take control of your.
So it's. They want my email address. Jason.
Jason. I agree to allow. Diverse diagnostics to store.
And process my personal details. On my personal data. Right.
So I'm submitting it now. Thank you for taking. The autism test.
Check results. Okay. Oh blimey.
No really. Check results. Okay.
Okay. High score for autism traits. Your test results.
Indicate a high score. For traits commonly. Associated with autism.
Spectrum. Disorder. ASD.
We understand. Receiving results that indicate. Autism traits can feel.
Overwhelming. Not really. Not to me anyway.
I've done these tests 20 years ago. Just. It's important to remember.
That this test. Might not be accurate. And it isn't a substitute.
For a professional. Diagnosis. You can learn.
More about autism. And get assessed. By a professional.
Who specializes. In ASD. Okay.
Book an ASD assessment here. A 15 minute telephone call. Consultation.
Get a free 15 minute consultation. Yeah. I'm going to save that.
Is there any point. Really. I mean.
If I just save it. Appointment. Okay.
All right. And if I go back to results. Will it save the results.
Check results. Okay. It's a very small.
It doesn't give. Check it doesn't give. Yeah.
Oh blimey. What. Doesn't go through all the different things.
That. I have ticked for in that. Which is weird.
But your test results. Indicate a high score. I've saved that.
All right. Your test results. Indicate a high score for traits.
Commonly associated. Associated. With autism spectrum disorder.
ASD in brackets. We understand. It's important.
You can learn about. Right okay. Yeah well.
I don't know what I'm supposed to do with that. I was going to do a few different. Tests but this is.
This is the only. Didn't have time. So this is the end of Saturday's.
Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Kind of brings us to the end. Of the recording man.
So. Thank you. For listening.
Please remember. To be kind to yourself. Because you do deserve.
To be happy. Lots of love. Bye.
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.