(no music) #1245 Two Jiu-jitsu clubs - Let Me Bore You To Sleep (30th November 2024)

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Today I'm rubbing I'm rubbing my hands for some reason. Today is Saturday the 30th of November 2024.

It's a bit overcast today, really bright yesterday, very sunny. Not warm, not warm, but sunny. Today.

It's not particularly cold, but it's very overcast. Very. It's not dull, but it's not bright.

You know, I mean, it's not you know, you get a suntan out there. I think it might be about to rain. I'm already I've already taken video out once earlier.

And I did think it was going to rain but it didn't. Anyway, my name's Jason Newland. Please only listen to this here recording when you can safely close your eyes.

I just posted on Facebook asking for everyone's date of birth. Yeah, I thought it'd be quite cool. Just I'm only for the people in my group.

So Jason Newland's boring group, my Facebook group, it's a private group. So you have to be you have to be a very special individual to be allowed in the group. So yeah, you know, on Facebook now, and every now and then, I see videos.

And it's usually DIY stuff, you know, but but weird DIY things. So this is a bloke put in a secret. Wow, there's a bloke putting a secret thing into the like a secret drawer into his wall.

It's very clever. Wow. I think my DIY skills are below par.

Let's say this is the kind of stuff that my dad would be able to do. I wouldn't know how to do stuff like this. He used to make your 54 stop bragging about your dad.

Okay, now he used to do. I don't want to call it but there was this is like in the 80s. He was involved with a caravan builders and is used to create create electrical things inside the caravans.

That's not a very descriptive description. But all I can tell you is so pretty. Well, I was impressed.

That's the whole story. I wasn't really much else left to that story. Wasn't the longest story ever.

Yesterday, I did Q&A Friday, and I now have this is now number the one I'm doing now is now number 1245 of the Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Barnacles or whatever. I don't know what that's probably not the right word barnacle.

So it's 26 minutes past 1pm. And I'm still going through I mean, I was going to do like a summary of last week, the last week. Although I feel like I might have kind of done that already yesterday.

So I might be repeating myself. However, I just been going online. Because I'm hoping not this year, but next year, to start getting back to doing a martial arts.

And I've been looking at this for quite a few months now. And I need I need to choose one that because martial arts in my, it's kind of in my soul most. I've done a few different ones over the years.

I never really progressed to the level that I would have. Or maybe I lost interest. I don't know.

But I never get into black belt was what I you know, I had that dream from a child. Before I even started doing any, any martial arts. You know, from probably the age of probably seven or eight, I wanted to be a black belt.

And the last time I did martial arts was just before I moved in here. So it's 10 years ago. And I had to stop because of my lower back.

And I was doing taekwondo and it is predominantly kicking and I couldn't do the kicks anymore. Without being in a huge, just a lot of pain. And that was weird, because that's the first time ever that I've left a class early, that I've had to walk out.

I didn't walk out in a huff and slam the door or anything. But you know, told everyone, not everyone will walk up to everyone individually. My back's hurting.

Bye. Hello, my back's hurting. I'm going to leave now.

Hello. Can you stop sparring? My back's hurting. Where's Paul was in the toilet.

Okay, I'll go and see him in the toilet. Hello. Paul, Paul, have you finished your poo yet? I just want to tell you that I'm leaving because my back.

Leave you alone. Okay. All right, then.

See you. Bye. I didn't go to up to each individual person.

But I spoke to the sensei or the sir, as I used to call him. We used to call him sir. And he didn't, he didn't like being called sir outside.

Which was weird, because I never, he had a name. I mean, he was, he did have, have a human name. But because I only really ever saw him in the class, I called him sir, because that was the etiquette.

In the same way as you bow when you enter the dojo, even if the dojo is a school hall, which most dojos are, they're usually school, not playgrounds, sports halls. And I would say, I imagine around the world, that's the majority of places where you learn martial arts would probably be at schools, in schools, not at school, but, you know, rented, rented school halls. I know what I'm trying to say.

At least someone does. And it's normal. That's what I found quite easy when I started going to the Buddhist center, because it's the same protocol.

You bow when you enter the shrine room, you bow when you leave the shrine room. You bow when you enter the dojo or the, the place where the martial arts is taking place, the training area, whatever you want to call it, and you bow when you leave. So that kind of thing.

And you bow when you address the teacher or the sensei. And you bow when you address maybe an order member at the Buddhist center. It's just the respect thing.

And, I mean, let's face it, it's an Eastern thing, isn't it? It's what the, the, it's where martial arts has come from, the East, whether India, Asia, China, those kind of places. It sounded almost like I knew what I was talking about then, and then I completely forgot what I was talking about. I know what I'm talking about, but what was the point of what, where was I going?

Well, I started this conversation, and it was for a reason.

Yeah, I, I've been thinking for ages, because there used to be a karate club directly opposite where I live in a school. I was there on one night a week. I went once, but it was just, it was, it was a very small area, very small, you know, because it's a junior school, so there's no, it wasn't a big area.

And it was the only adults there was me and the instructor. The rest were just kids. And admittedly, at least two of the kids were bigger than me, you know, six, six foot or whatever.

But still, they were still kids, and I was like, well, there's part of, I think, a part of doing any kind of activity, there is the social aspect. Even if you don't go drinking with them, or don't go out spending time outside of the club with the person or with the people, there's still that degree of like, just commonality, say hello, and how you doing? And it's Yeah, after a while, you get to know people in it.

So I wish I did with the Taekwondo club.

I was a little bit shy, though. There were some people I never really sort of talked to much. I didn't see them outside.

But my instructor still don't know his name, but I used to call him Sir. He used to take me to the gradients, I used to go in his car. And he told me off for calling him Sir, because I was in the back of the car.

It wasn't just me, there was a couple of people there as well. And I think his son was with his son was one of the instructors as well. He'd been a black belt since he was 10.

And my instructor didn't start doing Taekwondo till he was 40. So I quite like that because I just turned Yeah, I was 40 myself at that time. Yeah, I was 40.

So having an instructor who started maybe 12 years earlier, and he was my age, or 13 years earlier, whatever. So I thought, Oh, cool. This is pretty cool.

And he was in the back and saying, Sir, are we there yet? Sir? Is that okay? Can I have something to eat, please? Sir? Sir, can you help me take my socks off? He got a bit annoyed with me after a while. And he said, call me by my name. And no, I won't take your socks off.

You can have something to eat. I'd rather you not do it in my car. And I'd really rather you not bring your microwave with you next time.

And are we there yet? You'll know when we're there. Yeah, that doesn't make sense, does it? You'll know. See, you're confusing me now.

You'll know when we're there, because we'll stop the car and turn the engine off. And, you know, cry internally. That's what I did.

I cried internally. Very upset. It's just, I just wanted him to love me.

So yeah, that was a very nice bloke taking me to the gradings. I think I did four gradings when I was there. I think.

All first class passes. Thank you very much. That's the only thing I can say, of all the gradings I ever did during my martial art years, always got a first class grading.

But I never skipped a belt. I never skipped a grade. And I know people that have done that.

So I was never good enough to skip a belt. But at least I got a first class pass. So that was nice.

I probably told you, I mentioned this before, there was this bloke and I didn't really enjoy him. But anyway, he came in one day after going to a tournament. I never did any tournaments with the Taekwondo.

And he came back and he was so proud of this, this trophy he won. And he came first in a, it was like the kata, which is the form. You know, when you just, you're on your own, you do the, do all the different movements, punches, kicks, and all that stuff.

Some people call it a kata, like kata, K-A-T-A. Other people call it a form, F-O-R-M. Everyone's got their own names and stuff.

And they've got their individual names as well, what the kata is or what the form is. Anyway, he became, got first place. He was so proud, so proud of holding this.

He literally, he'd got a hat. And he got a hat and on top of it was the trophy, glued to the top of the hat. And you could see him coming because it was on his little moped and he had it on top of his helmet.

And he got a bit unstuck because he went under a bridge that was too low. But that's besides the point. He was so proud.

And I heard some laughing in the corner, you know, sort of during a break. And I sort of went over and listened. And it turned out that the reason he got first place is because he was the only entry.

He was the only person that entered that particular part of the contest. It's just, he couldn't make it up. I mean, obviously you couldn't enter a fighting contest if there's only one of you.

Farting contest, I'd be, I'd be number one all the time. Why do you keep having to talk about farting? I don't understand. Why do you keep doing it? Right.

So I've got, so far I've got two people who give me their dates, their years of birth. Not given me, but shared it with the group. So I've been looking, I've been looking for a martial arts club.

One that really is more suitable for my age, or my body. I don't know, I mean, that sounds wrong, but something which isn't like a lot of cardio, although I do need to improve my cardio, I'm never going to be running a marathon. That just ain't going to be happening.

I couldn't do it when I was in the peak of my fitness. Definitely ain't going to be doing it now. But, you know, I've been getting fitter and gradually getting stronger over time, over the last few months, doing weights, and I'm going to start doing a bit more walking.

Vinnie, come on, darling. No, mate, no. The whole point of us being here with the door closed is so you don't bark.

If you're going to bark, what's the point? What's the point, Vin? Eh? I think you'd agree there's no point. Is there anyone there? Is there anyone there? No, there's no one at the door. Right, it's one of those days Vinnie's started barking and it has started raining outside.

Two things that don't make me feel wonderful. So hopefully he'll calm down a bit. I've got the window open but I have got the living room door closed.

But I have to have one because of the air circulation. I have the window open all year round because I like to have some air coming in. Apart from when it's really cold.

When it's really cold, then I don't have the window open. Because that's just a bit too cold, that's all. So I don't have the window open in the bedroom in the winter.

But then, since I've had Vinnie, I can't always have it open at night during the summer because of the sounds. Any sound is like, oh, is that a butterfly three miles away just past wind? Okay, so where are we going with this? I had a thingy. Oh, okay.

I found two. I found a martial arts club which is a Jiu Jitsu Academy. And I found this ages ago.

And I bookmarked it because it's it's it's looked like it's a possibility, a good possibility. Okay, there's Oh, let's have a look. Tuesday, Tuesday.

So there's a beginner's class. So let's have a look on a Monday. It's available.

Yeah, so it's available at 11 o'clock on a Monday till noon. 1230 to 130. On a Monday, so I could go during the day.

Tuesday, 6am to 7am. No, thanks. And so 1230 to 130.

So that's, you can go there as well. Wednesday, 11am to noon. You can go.

Just during the day would be better for me really. So there's nothing on a Thursday. There's evening ones.

On a Friday, 11am to noon. That's an open mat. So I guess it's practicing the Wednesdays as well.

Okay, so Friday, 11am to noon open mat. But then there's 1230 to 130 mixed levels. So let's have a look.

Mixed levels 1230 to 130 Monday. Mixed levels 1230 to 130 Tuesday. There's an open mat Wednesday, but we'll leave that for now.

So Thursday. Okay, so go to Friday, 1230 to 130 mixed levels. So I could do Monday, Wednesday.

No, Monday, Tuesday, and Friday, midday. Saturday. There's also 1130 to 1230.

So it's a mixed level. Sunday is closed. So potentially, I could go Monday, Tuesday, Friday, and Saturday.

During the day. Now, if I could get there for 6am to 7am, I'm laughing at that. Just the idea of, I mean, to be fair, it's not that difficult because I get up at about four in the morning anyway.

But I don't think I would trust Vinnie to be on his own at that time in the morning without barking. That would worry me. Although Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, Monday, Monday's 11am.

Tuesday, Tuesday. We'll see. So I think how it works.

I've mentioned this before. So membership. I think what you have to do to start with is signing for a beginner's course.

It's one, it's every Tuesday and Thursday for a month at 6.30pm. And then once the month is over, it's like just a monthly fee, which is £80 a month. The initial beginner's course is £120. The beginner's course, it says £120 per session, but I think it's like for the whole, it better be, bloody hell, limited.

I just swear, I never swear on these recordings, do I? Yes. So I, Tuesday and Thursday. So if I started in, well, once I got the money together, if I can save that up, I can start on a Tuesday at 6.30pm to 7.30pm. And then a Thursday, 6.30pm to 7.30pm. Do that for a month.

And this is, oh, I didn't tell you, this is jiu-jitsu. Because I've looked at two jiu-jitsu clubs, that's, I miss out bits, don't I? So I've come to the conclusion, rightly or wrongly, that jiu-jitsu may be the best sport for me, based on age, based on my lower back, not necessarily being able to run around or kick and stuff. So I'm thinking jiu-jitsu would perhaps be the best one for me.

And it might be really good for me, physically and mentally, to do that. And then go, if I can go a few times a week after that, once the first month's done. So it's £120 for the first month, but you do get a gi.

For those who don't know what a gi is, it's like a big horse full of jewels, and you wind it up and it sings Christmas carols. It's not that, it's just the costume, not the costume, oh, did I say costume? It's not fancy dress, it's the white suit that, I mean, some people call them pyjamas, but they're not. And it's just a standard thing, gi, g-i, which is used in a lot of martial arts, most, I would probably argue, not all, but a lot.

So I found two, two different places, and they both look good, both look good. One isn't specifically jiu-jitsu, one does I'll read it off to you, where is it? It does, home, let's go to home, and I'll read it off to you. Right, they do MMA, Muay Thai, boxing, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, no-gi submission wrestling, and kids' classes.

So let's see, this is the first one, not the one that I mentioned earlier. The one I mentioned before is specifically just jiu-jitsu. So mixed martial arts is one of the fastest growing sports in the world, and one of the earliest, derived from pankration, all of powers, which was introduced at the Greek Olympic Games, 648 BC, and Veiled Tudo, a no-holds-barred sport popular in Brazil, the sport of mixed martial arts increasing popularity, blah, blah.

So they charge, you get a free trial, so you get a free, first free class, which is nice. That's often the way, I think, with martial arts clubs. They've got, with this place, it's £65 a month if you choose one discipline, but if you pay £85 a month, you can choose to do anything.

You can pretty much turn up for all the classes. So you've got Muay Thai, boxing, Brazilian jiu-jitsu, I mean, I'm looking at all the classes, see all the classes, timetable, sorry. Classes, timetable.

Okay, if I go to timetable, just banged the microphone. If I go to timetable for Brazilian jiu-jitsu. Okay, here we go.

What? That's not what I wanted. Classes, Brazilian jiu-jitsu. Personal hygiene rules.

Okay, that'd be interesting. What does it say there? No farting. Please, no farting in people's faces.

That is, I mean, this is a genuine concern of mine, because if I was to sort of bend around on the floor on my own, there's a chance the odd fart might escape out of its prison. And, yeah, that is, I mean, there's one thing doing that, aiming one at someone, but aiming at someone that can do jiu-jitsu is not a good idea, is it? Please ensure you keep excellent personal hygiene when attending classes.

Do I need to bring my own kit? Bring your own kit and keep it sanitized regularly.

You're big on hygiene, this is good. Are all the classes suitable for me? No, you're overweight, you're old. Choose something that doesn't take so much effort.

That's rude, isn't it? Blimey. No, it says all classes on the timetable are suitable for complete beginners to intermediates. Pro classes are invite only and do not, are they not on the timetable? Okay.

Well, I haven't really got to worry about pro classes right now, have I? No. So let's have a look at timetable. Timetable, Monday.

Beginners, intermediate. Okay, so for the jiu-jitsu, six to seven, seven to eight. No gi grappling, no gi grappling, intermediate, advanced, beginners, intermediate.

Okay, so BJJ, no grappling, that would be wrestling, wouldn't it? Okay, so BJJ, beginners, is on a Tuesday. And then BJJ, the next BJJ, beginners, isn't. Right, there isn't, it's only once a week.

Oh, but you've got all levels. So there's one BJJ, all levels. There's a sparring, seven to 745.

BJJ, all levels on a Friday. BJJ. So this doesn't really, it looks good.

I mean, it looks like a, you know, a good place. But I was thinking, meh, you know, they've got two floors as well. But I'm thinking, yeah.

Let's look at the gallery, the place that I'm thinking of going to. I'd like to go somewhere where I'm not the oldest. That might sound weird to sort of be like that.

But I don't really want to be because I don't want to be the oldest, it's as simple as that. I don't want to be known as the old man. You know, go and get old, the old bloke.

No one learns my name, just everyone knows when you say the old bloke. Oh, yeah, the old bloke. Right, pointing to me like, no, learn my name.

What's my name? What's my name? It's not old bloke, it isn't old bloke, it's Jason. That's not my name. The sad thing about it is I'll be trained by people.

It's like, there's nothing wrong with that, but I'm going to get trained by people younger than me. When I was younger, it was always people older than me. Now everyone's younger than me.

Everyone in the whole world, every single person. Competitions. So this, now I'm at the jujitsu place.

It's the only place that I've found that's specifically for jujitsu. Facilities. Oh, right.

Okay, so this is them at the this is them at the what's it competition winner 2022. Wow, cool. 2023.

Okie dokie. So let's have a look. Contact.

Where is it though? That's the question, isn't it? I don't know how far away it is. Let me see. What I need to do find out how much it's going to cost in a taxi.

Because it might cost a lot of money, and I don't. I suppose I might be able to ask myself, can I do the the introduction, but just come once a week and do it over two months? They might say yes, they might not. But they might, but they might not.

Okay, let's go to the minicab app on my phone. Pick up from pick up from Oh, okay. 73 73.

Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, 73. Okay. And nope.

I just want to get a quote. Book ride now on a book a ride. I want to get a quote bookings.

Upcoming. They're not upcoming ongoing. No history.

There's no bookings found. I've used them before. That's weird.

Well, I have to go on to Google. And let's chat GPT can do it. I wonder.

Give taxi price from to where did I find a kid dokey. I wonder. Oh, it's giving me an estimate of around £18.40. That's just one way.

Wow. Not really doable, is it? It's not even that's not even nearly possible. But then if I go during the day, the rest of the time I can get a bus up there.

I don't know how much how many buses it takes. But in the evening, the buses kind of stop. I could pass get a bus there and in a taxi back.

They're still at 40. Oh, blimey. Okay, let's see what buses what buses do I need for this? I need for this journey.

Let's see. The journey bus route walk to the nearest bus stop. Take a bus so as a head toward the transfer to bus to bus.

It's not giving me the numbers. I do need the numbers. Okay.

I mean, I guess there's two buses, at least two buses. And it's not in a nice part of town either. She says this, this, this, this part of me that thinks it'd be quite nice to go back and learn, get back to training a little bit, but do it gently, not into like hectic or lots of energetic.

I basically just put in any effort in I don't want to put much effort in just the bare minimum. To start with, just take it nice and slowly. I might have the wrong attitude for it.

I don't know. Yeah, I did. I mean, I did do jujitsu a few times back in about 2005 2006 time, unfortunately, or 2007.

It was around that time. And it was a local martial arts club. And they did karate and didn't want to want to do karate again.

So I've done it before. And I do I wanted to do something different. I've done Wing Chun previous to that as well.

So I thought, well, I'll do something different. And I literally walked past this martial arts club every day. So I decided to go to the jujitsu.

There's only me and one other bloke there. He had a sports car, not relevant, but he did. I'm not sure what he did for a living.

He had a nice, really nice car. And I think he gave me a lift home. We had a cuddle.

That's it, nothing else. And he gave me we didn't I don't know why I say stuff like that. It's weird, isn't it? Why do I have to just say silly things.

But this bloke that was teaching. He was having too much fun hurting us. But really enjoying it.

And I don't enjoy other people hurting me. But what I enjoy less is people enjoying hurting me. You know, there's a cut off.

There's a point which I don't like. And unfortunately, when it's a jujitsu expert, instructor doing it, there's not a lot you can do. It's just, you know, it's like sparring with a professional boxer, and he punches you too hard or she punches you too hard.

You're like, what are you going to do? You can't win. Okay, I want to punch him harder. And then you're going to wake up 10 minutes later.

So it's, it's a, yeah, it's a weird, weird environment. But I didn't, this bloke, although he wasn't horrible, he was friendly, but he was a bit of a bully. And he was trying to rip my arm out.

He seemed like he was trying to hurt me. And I was a lot fitter back then, just was younger, was fitter, probably stronger and all that. And didn't weigh as much as I do now.

But I didn't. Yeah, I never never taken kindly to physical pain from another person. Yeah, it's not my favorite thing.

So I stopped going. It's just too hard. Now it put me off because I thought, really? So is this all it is just pain? That I can do this myself, I can you know, I don't need to go and pay someone else to hurt me.

I mean, there's a name for that, isn't there? BDSM or whatever it is. I don't need I don't know, not not my thing. And so it put me off a little bit.

I'm thinking though, if I go to club that's more, like, family oriented, orientated, oriented, whatever, where there's gonna be people of all ages. And they'll be a bit more gentle. They'll see this elderly old man, me walking in, I'll see an elderly.

It's really weird. I see elderly men. And I and it's like, I didn't realize it's a mirror.

It's like I walked into. Yeah, I walked into the gym once just to check it out. This is in town.

And I was thinking, Oh, good. There are people older here than me, the people here. And it was a mirror.

It's like, oh, that would have worked better if I hadn't already mentioned it. I looked in the mirror and saw myself and thought it was an older person. But you know, let's just forget that.

I don't realize what I look like until I see myself. Which in some ways seemed like a standard obvious statement, but I don't look the same as I used to. Not to me.

Mind you, I discovered something the other day. I was getting ready for bed. Now was I getting ready for bed? Yeah, I was getting ready for bed.

So I had my glasses off, I put them, I've got like a routine, put my glasses on the table, so I know where they are. Go into the bathroom, do what I need to do there. And then I go into the bedroom and go to bed.

Well, I heard activity downstairs, and it was a neighbor. So I knocked on the window to go down and see them. So I went down.

I saw a couple of people. And what I realized is everyone looks better. People look different when I haven't got glasses on.

So my eyesight, it's people. And I wonder maybe I look different. If I take my glasses off, maybe if I look in the mirror, I can see what I really look like.

It's almost like these glasses are transforming or distorting how things really are. Because when I look in the mirror with these glasses, I look old. But when I don't wear them, I don't look so old.

So I'm thinking it's making it sort of, I don't know, is it like a prank? Is it a spec saver prank? I don't know. So look, see, when I bought them, was it the 1st of April? Why the 1st of April though? Why, you know, April Fool's Day? Where did that even come from? Anyone? Does anyone know? Anyone? I'm gonna ask. Origin of, of April Fool's Day.

Let me see what chat GPT, my assistant says. The origin of April Fool's Day is not entirely clear. Well, why? Just tell me, don't, don't.

There are several theories about how it began. So here's the first one, calendar, calendar change theory. One of the most popular theories like links April Fool's Day to the 1582 adoption of the Gregorian calendar by much of Europe.

This reform introduced by Pope Gregory X 111 moved the start of the new year from late March, early April. Moved the start of the new year from late March to early April, that late March, early April, as it was under the Julian calendar to January 1st. Wow, I didn't know that.

Did you know that? So in 1582, sorry Vinnie, I just trod on his foot, I'm sorry mate. In 1582, before 1582, New Year's Day was the beginning of April or late at the end of March, not the 1st of January. I didn't know that.

Does anyone else know that? Confusion and mockery. I mean, some countries might say that doesn't make sense, but some people in countries, your country didn't exist at that time, because you know. But Pope Gregory, I mean, that's that'd be Italy, wouldn't it? So why did we take that on? Or would the Romans do? The Romans weren't in charge then, was they? Because the Romans ruled England or Britain for 800 years or something like that.

Or was it 400 years? It was a long time anyway. I mean, that's a hell of a long movie if you were sitting watching it. Oh, I wonder.

Anyway, confusion and mockery. Some people continued to celebrate the old New Year in late March and early April. These individuals were mocked as fools by others who adhered to the new calendar.

Over time, pranks and jokes became associated with this period. I mean, because some bloke with a hat in another country says, you know, got to celebrate, you're like, no. I can see why people wouldn't want to change something that's been the same for maybe hundreds and hundreds of years.

Although to us, it makes sense, January the first, beginning of the year, doesn't it? It makes sense. But the end of March would make sense if that's what we grew up to understand, and our parents, and our parents before them, and their parents, and their parents, and their parents, and their, you know, it's like going back generations. Still haven't received my DNA test, and I went on to Ancestry, and nothing.

It's really weird. It's been, what, over two months now. The second potential reason for April Fool's Day is spring renewal and festivals.

April Fool's Day may have roots in ancient spring festivals, where people celebrating the changing of seasons with playful and mischievous behaviour. For example, Roman festival of Hilaria, celebrating the end of March. Hilaria, I'm not quite sure how to say it, involved games, jokes, and dressing up in disguises.

Oh, cool. That was in Rome. Very, very Roman everything here, isn't it? Were we Roman back then in this country? I don't know.

It's hard to keep track of all the different countries that invaded my country. We were invaded so many times in the past. It got to the point where we eventually thought, you know what, we're going to do the invading.

Maybe. It's very strange. If you imagine being born and knowing nothing else other than the Romans being in charge, knowing nothing else, that's how it's always been, as far as you know.

That's how it's been your whole life. There's no question in it. I do wonder if I was related to one of the slaves back then, because I imagine a lot of the children that were born would have been born from the love, the love between some of the Romans and the indigenous people.

Fish-related origins. In France, April 1st is known as Poison d'Avril, Poisson d'Avril, Poisson d'Avril, April Fish. That's in brackets.

This tradition may have started in the 16th century, when people played pranks by attaching paper fish to each other's backs. The fish symbolised a gullible person, as young fish are easily caught. I mean, we did that at school, didn't we? I don't know if you did it at school, but you'd write a rude sign and get some sellotape and stick it on someone's back as they walked past.

Do you remember that? It wasn't just a once-a-year event at my school, it was every day. No one else seemed to get it done. I didn't see anyone else have them on the back of their backs, but I used to come home and have them back.

Sometimes I'd get to school it was on there, so I don't know how it got on there before I even left the house. My parents. Literary references, which is number four.

The first documented association of April Fool's Day with pranks appears in a 1561 Flemish poem by Edouard D. Den, where a noble man sends his servant on foolish errands on April 1st. By the 18th century, the day was widely celebrated with pranks across Europe. Ah, isn't that interesting? So quite a few, could be a mix of all those things, I guess.

So, modern celebration, while its exact origin is debated, April Fool's Day is now celebrated worldwide with playful tricks and jokes, often light-hearted and harmless. Over time, it has evolved into a day full of humour, creativity, and sometimes elaborate hoaxes. The newspapers generally do an April Fool's hoax story, and they put it on the front page, or they put it somewhere.

It's very hard to know which one's which, because all the stories look like they're April Fool's stories. Everything the newspaper prints just looks unbelievable at times. Blimey.

O.T. O.T. O.T. Mabuse. O.T. O.T. O.T. Mabuse. That's one of the Jungle get-me-out-of-here Jungle contestants.

I think she used to be called Strictly Come Dancing. I remember it used to just be called Come Dancing. It's ironic really, because now it's called Strictly Come Dancing, and it's not as strict as it used to be.

It's a bit more laid-back, if anything. You know, all the laughing, and the jokes, and the relaxing. Come Dancing didn't used to be like that in the past.

It was very strict rules, quite tight rules, and people took it seriously. Now it's almost become like a fun fair, and there's nothing wrong with fun, but you need to be fair with the fun fair. It's called fun fair for a reason.

It needs to be fair. It's very... I don't know what that meant. It sounded good then when I said it.

I thought, oh, that will lead me somewhere nice. There's possibly a humorous anecdote or something in that, but nothing came up. Admittedly, I didn't spend much time thinking about it, but in the moment, it was like, this is just saying the word.

Breaking the word fun fair into fun and fair, and focusing on each part of the word, and nothing good's really going to come of it. It's a bit pointless. Now, admittedly, I didn't need to tell you that.

I didn't need to really go into the... Do you think maybe I overthink about, I overthink things sometimes? Maybe. I didn't need to tell you that either, did I? Do I need to mention that perhaps I overthink? I don't think there's anything wrong with overthinking. It's not like it keeps me awake.

Very little of what goes on in my life keeps me awake, because I have a very boring life. Yes, I do. Facebook is getting silly now.

It's just the amount of stuff that they're putting on there. Oh, the... Some of it's interesting, but what? Right, okay. I'm just seeing stuff, and I'm thinking, what? I don't know what I'm looking at.

Like an ice cream maker, made of... I don't know what it's made of. I really don't know. Anyway.

Right. Oh, what could go wrong? I don't want to watch that. I don't want to watch that.

So I'm thinking, I could go to the jujitsu-specific club, or go to the other one, which is in a different place. Let's find out where that is. To find out the address.

Where's the address? I mean, this looks like it's even further away. Okay. And change target address to... Okay, six miles.

So from my house to the other place, it's six miles. Estimated taxi fare would be 1580. That's from Taxi Price Compare, some website they've used.

I don't know, I kind of like the idea of going to just one place, which focuses on just one thing, rather than lots of different things. So let me have a look. Have a look at the places I used to go to.

So I used to go to boxing at this club. This is when I was at university. Oh, they've got a World Champ there.

Wow, brilliant. Why is it? Okay. So you've got classes.

Let's have a look at the classes. Karate, MMA, boxing, energising powerlift club. Okay, karate, MMA.

So when I went there, there was boxing, there was karate, there was... I'm pretty sure they had jujitsu, perhaps not. But they had Krav Maga, Krav Maga. Yeah, Krav Maga.

And I also had kickboxing, but it don't look like they have that anymore. Oh, no, they do. Karate, kickboxing, boxing, Little Dragons, Muay Thai, and MMA.

No, not Muay Thai, Muay Thai. Muay Thai, that's a drink, isn't it? Or it's an argument when you're in Thailand. There are two men arguing, she's Muay Thai.

Oh dear, that's really bad. Or he's Muay Thai. Karate.

So that's... I used to go there for the boxing. And they really, they were friendly. But the two things I really didn't like about the place, or I struggle a little bit is, first of all, there were adults there, but it was mainly kids.

I wasn't allowed to spar, which takes away the fun of it, really. Because I was too old. I think 36 is the... 34, 36 is the legal limit or something.

Because it was an amateur boxing club. And also there was an audience of parents watching. And I could tell that I could hear laughter.

Now, you might think, oh, paranoia, paranoia. If you knew how much I sweat when I exercise. And I was wearing a t-shirt and it would be soaked through, like completely soaked.

I mean, you say, it used to be wet, it used to get completely wet. And I would just walk into the punch bag. That's before it even started.

So, yeah, I got through a couple of t-shirts. And I think it was... So having the audience I didn't like. It does, I think with karate and you're always going to have, you know, your parent sticking around waiting for the kid or something like that.

But not, I mean, literally like a gallery. There's sometimes like 20 adults waiting, just watching their kids. And because they did it in an area where there was an area for people to watch.

There was over the other side as well, tables and stuff. So I guess it's very family orientated. But I didn't enjoy that.

I don't like an audience when I'm sweating. The other thing that really, I just, I felt that I was just being ignored. Now, admittedly, I didn't expect, you know, when I walked in every time for everyone to start shouting my name and cheering and all the instructors to run up and hug me and lift me up in the air like, he is the champion of the world.

Jason, yeah, I didn't expect that. It would be nice once or twice, but I didn't expect it. But I felt very much ignored.

I'd be left to just do my own thing. And the reason for that is because it was an amateur boxing club. I was of no use to them.

So I wasn't able to go to tournaments, I wasn't able to win any medals. Because I was old. Even then I was old.

And this is this is when I was like 38 39. I wasn't that old, but I'm now a little bit older than that. Wow.

So that you know, I did sometimes say, oh, you've lost weight. So I always lose weight when I do martial arts, or any karate and boxing is not martial art. But technically, you could say is because boxing was Eastern thing as well.

They used to call it boxing, but it's more Kung Fu. Yeah, like Chinese boxers and stuff. But I, I don't know, I just didn't feel equal.

Didn't feel equal. And I wasn't. I mean, there's a picture of the people that have got grades, or I guess they got grades or there's a tournament.

But they're pretty much all you can see the only people that aren't kids, are the instructors, and there's one, one, one adult. There's obviously an adult. Another one might be an adult.

So when red tops, and there's a woman that might be in it, it's hard to tell from the picture. But everyone else is kids. And I'd like it to be, ideally, all adults, that would be preferable.

But you know, I don't have a say over that. So I'm thinking I'm going to go. If I can find a way to do it, go to the Jiu Jitsu Academy, rather than going to a place that does lots of different ones.

I mean, for example, there is a Where is it? I'll show you the place I used to go to. Place I used to go to. No, that's not the one.

Where is it? Oh, that's it. Show me the website. Why is the website? There it is.

Got it. So they've been going for a long time. This club, where I used to live, this club that I used to walk past where I did the Jiu Jitsu, the instructor, the karate instructor, or the person in charge of the whole club who has been in karate for decades and decades.

He used to do my gradings when I was a kid at school for the karate. And they've got their own building now. And I don't know how long the building's been there, but it's been there a long time.

It's, yeah, it's a cool, cool place. I just don't, I don't know. I don't know if I fancy, I wouldn't go there, it's too far away.

But they do do, oh, they do Crab Maga now. They do, they've got Little Dragons, it's for kids, junior karate, adult karate. See, that suits me, to rather go to like an adult class, you know.

And we've got Family Karate, Black Belt Karate, Crab Maga, self-defense, and kickboxing. Cool. Should we go to the website for my, for the one that I used to go to, shall we? Yeah.

Yeah. So this is the karate club I used to go to when I was little, when I was little, little, little, little, little, little. Ooh, little, I was so little, little kid I was, I was, I was.

Oh, where is it? Well, there's clearly more than one martial arts place there now. They used to be just one, now there's, no, there didn't used to be, there was two. There was a karate and a judo club, but now there is more than that.

Oh, okay. So I want to try and find my one. Oh, I know how to do it.

I know his name. I still remember my, my, my instructor's name. I found it and it's not working.

The website's not up. Why is that? Why is the website not up? That's not fair. It's not right.

It should be up. It's been there since 1974. And, oh, there's a picture of my instructor and he's a sixth band, he's a sixth band now.

He was presented with the prestigious EKKA student of the year award at this year's summer camp. He was presented with the student of the year. Okay.

The award was presented by association president. Ah, and that's the man Mick. He's the one that, ah, so he was his instructor.

Which is why he did the gradings for us. Oh, it makes sense. Wow.

And it was for Paul. So Paul was my old instructor. He got that for being supporting the association and since the very beginning, 50 years ago.

Wow. It's amazing because I used to see my instructor. Probably what? 19.

Because I started working in the chip shop, 86. So probably 86, 87, 88. I'd see him every now and then.

I knew where he worked. I didn't go into his place of work by his, you know, because he worked in town. So I saw him in Tesco or something like that.

And he'd ask me, when am I coming back? And I would always say, oh, soon, soon. Sometimes I say, what's it got to do with you? I'll come back when I want to come back. I want to come back.

I might go somewhere else. I'm already better than you. Yeah, sure.

I really liked him a lot. He used to give me lifts to the gradings. No, not the gradings.

He'd give me lifts to the tournaments. That's it, the tournaments. Yeah, he was cool.

I nearly went back there. I nearly went back, not to the club, but to the town. That's where my nan used to live.

And I actually, when I was near the front of the list of getting a council flat, or bidding, I was able to. And this was 2014. I bidded on a property, which was in the same town as where my nan lived.

And probably, no, was it, yeah, probably like November time. And I was bidding, and I got offered, yeah, and I bidded on it. And they said, oh, you're at the top of the list.

You're number one. I always wanted to be number one. And I thought, okay, cool.

And then they never got back to me. That's why I assumed, and then I was offered another place. And I thought, oh, they must have just changed my mind.

So I was offered a chance to see this place, which I came to see. And about two or three weeks after I'd been here, moved in, that is, I got a phone call from them saying, so do you want to come and have a look at this property then? They left it weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks, months even. So I don't know what, why, maybe they had a tenant and they couldn't get rid of the tenant or something, couldn't get them out.

It was like, really? Really? And it was too late. And if I had gone there, I could have gone back to the karate club. I wonder, oh, imagine if he'd remember me.

He wouldn't remember me, would he? Because 86, 96, 2006, 2006, it's like, blimey. That's over 12 years, isn't it? That's a long time. He's unlikely to remember me because I don't look the way I used to look.

Which is annoying, it's annoying because my little brother and my step-little brother both look the same. To me, they look the same. I just haven't, I haven't aged really.

I've never aged, but not like, aged, aged, if that makes sense. They're not like, just, I look completely different. I don't look anything like how I used to look.

Especially when I look through these glasses because they're all distorted. Turn the glasses off, I look fine, baby, just fine. So this karate club founded, the one I used to go to, founded 1974.

I went in about 1984 or 1983, 84. So it's only been running for 10 years. And it is the longest running martial arts club in the area.

It says, I wonder if it's still the same days, Tuesday and Thursday. I wonder. I don't know.

I've got no idea. Oh well. But he looks well.

My old instructor. And you think if he's been an instructor since the time he was for 50 years, he's going to be in his 70s now. So he looks amazing.

Honestly, he looks just and he's really tall. So he's about 6'6", I'd say. And if I remember rightly, he's really tall, slim, but strong, you know, for that matter.

He's big, but not, he hasn't quite got the belly that I've got. I think that would have helped him. Maybe not.

Wow. Imagine that, all the people he's helped, all the kids that he's helped and the people for since 1974. That's nearly my entire life.

It's a long time, isn't it? It's literally 50 years this year. How many people have done the same thing, stuck to the same thing for 50 years? I struggled to stick to the same thing for 50 minutes. Wow.

Right. So this is, I guess this is a short recording. How long have I been talking for? Sorry Vinnie, I didn't realise I was sitting on you.

Yeah, it's a little bit of a shorter recording. I think I might have to take a little wally for a W-A-L-K, an afternoon wander, perhaps. Yeah.

Yeah. So we've got boxes on tonight, which is good. And tomorrow's Sunday.

I don't know if I'm going to continue doing the Sunday papers, because I got rid of the app, the Sunday newspaper app. Well, it's not a Sunday newspaper app, but it's just, I don't know if I'm going to bother. I've looked at ways of getting the news, but I'll be honest with you, I look through the news and it's just, it's so hard to find anything that's kind of, even slightly positive.

It's just, you know, it's, I think it would take all day long looking through every single paper that I can get my hands on from around the world to find some funny stuff or some nice stuff. It's, that's just the way newspapers are, isn't it? For some reason, I don't quite know why. I do wonder though, if the newspaper was created and it was only good news.

You know, that's all it was, just good news. Would anyone want to look at it? Would they? I don't know. I don't know.

Anyway, I'm going to go. Thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself.

What was I going to talk about in this recording? Anyone? I don't know. I really don't know. Can't remember.

I'm sure there was a topic. Oh, well, at least on a Monday, Tuesday and Friday. It's more focused kind of Mondays, I talk about boring object or boring subject.

Some would argue I do that every day when I make a recording. Tuesday is trivia Tuesday. Friday is Q&A Friday.

So it's a little bit focused on those days. Maybe not so much on the other days. Oh, well.

Thank you for listening. So remember to be kind to yourself. Be gentle with yourself because you do deserve to be happy.

Lots of love. Bye.