#1024 Let me bore you to sleep

Hello and welcome to Let Me Bore You To Sleep. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes and relax.

I've just given him a bone. He was lying on the bed. He was asleep.

I knew just from experience that as soon as I sat down and started talking, he would come running in here and hassle me. So I thought I'd get prepared and I've got one of these little bony things that he can chew on. And as soon as I crinkled the bag that contains the bone things, I hear him jump off the bed and he's running in there.

So I put it in my pocket. I turn the recording gear on and I sit down. I give him the bone.

He runs off. Two seconds later, he's back hassling me. So, would you want another bone? But now he's gone back to do his thing.

So that's good. Oh, itchy bum. You didn't need to know that, did you? Sorry.

Oh. One click to Amazon. Oh, this is new.

This is new. Apparently, there's one click to distribution to Amazon. Music.

Didn't know that. I'll give that a go. Because I'm not.

I'm not sure if I'm on Amazon Music. Right. Vinnie's just started barking because someone let a door slam downstairs, which is kind of standard.

But I could have done without him doing it right now. So yeah, I can share on Amazon Music and Audible. I'm pretty sure I'm already on Audible.

I think I am with most of my podcasts. But Amazon Music is pretty good. I'll be honest, I favor Amazon Music overall over Spotify.

For the music, not so much the podcasts. I think Spotify has got the edge for podcasts. But Amazon Music plus, you know, the good one.

It's maybe I don't know, maybe it's because they've got Garth Brooks. And Amazon Music is the only place that has Garth Brooks. Maybe that's the reason.

And perhaps they are the one they hold the rights to certain artists that other places can't have them. I don't know how it works. But I'm quite impressed with Amazon Music.

I do like it. But it's one of those things that do I need it? I don't really need it. Spotify is cheaper.

I think Amazon Music plus is, it's like 11 pound a month, I think. What I do listen to quite a bit, well, quite a bit every single day is Audible. I'm not currently a member of them.

But I've been with them for years on and off. And I've got a lot books, audio books that I can listen to that I own. So I listen to audio books every day.

When I'm in bed, partly because I like listening to audio books. And the other reason is because Vinnie has a tendency of barking every time a snail farts outside. So I have to kind of, you know, almost distract him as well.

So yeah, it's kind of where I am with that. But I do listen to, it's quite a few, I can give you a list of some of the ones that I listen to most. I've been thinking.

Fireworks have gone off. You've been thinking? Yeah, I've been thinking. And what are we thinking about? What makes me unique? Not in a egotistical way.

What makes me a little bit different from other things that you can, especially on YouTube, that you can listen to, or on social media. And one of the things that is different with me is, I have mentioned this before, is the fact that I don't speak really quickly. Like really quickly.

And the way that the, especially YouTube, there's now software, AI, that you can put your video in. So you can make a video and upload it to an AI. I forget, there's a few different ones that do it.

And they will literally edit the video for you, save you huge amounts of time. So I've just had another person knock at my door. My door has been very busy today.

And that's about three in the last hour. The last two hours and one earlier. Anyway, I can't even remember what I was talking about.

I was talking about listening to Audible. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, you've got these AI things.

And they basically edit out every gap, like every gap. Almost people are talking, the next word overlaps the previous word. And that seems to be, I wonder if young people, you know, growing up watching this stuff and listening to this stuff, actually think that that's the way to talk.

That's the way to do it. Do they actually, not, not their fault, because that's what they're seeing and hearing. And maybe they think that's, that is like natural way to speak is really fast, and leave no gaps.

Which ought to be is pretty much impossible for me unless I'm going through a manic period, then I might. But generally, there are gaps between, maybe they don't have to be quite so many gaps, but there are gaps between the words and gaps between the sentences. And I, there's software, AI software, again, for podcasters, where you can cut out all silences.

So that that gap there will just be cut out. So be you could cut out any silences, that bit there, you could cut out that that's how it would sound like instant, that'd be there, you cut out any silences, that'd be there. And I don't personally, I think it's, I don't know if denigrating is the right word.

Under, under estimating younger people by saying that, you know, young people have got no attention span. And I wonder whether or not, you know, so it's all the video games in the internet, don't you have to have pretty good concentration to be sitting in front of a computer screen or, you know, playing a video game to be doing that for solid for hours and hours and hours.

That's a heck of a lot of concentration required to do that.

Which in concentration requires attention. You can't concentrate without attention, I don't think. And just because something's fast moving, it's like someone is driving on a motorway, like an F1 driver.

Because they're driving so fast, they got no attention span, even though they might be driving for three hours with pit stops, but they're driving around the circular around the track or whatever. Oh, they've got no attention span because they're driving so fast, because everything's happening so fast. I call BS on that one.

I'd say they're hugely attentive, they have to be. Their life depends upon, and everyone else on the track depends, and the audience as well, standing by, depend on them being attentive and having the ability to focus and to have an attention span that's phenomenal. Just a theory, just a theory I have.

This whole putting down young people, they've got no attention span. I'm not sure if you're correct on that one. Besides, you can't say anything, anyone really, can you? You can't sort of, everyone does this, because not everyone does anything.

Apart from breathe and poo, not everyone does everything. But didn't you just say that young people learn to talk fast because of what they see online? And I didn't say that's necessarily true, I just said it was like a question, maybe, is that a possibility? I've noticed as I got older that young people speak faster anyway. I think as people get older, they start to slow down a little bit.

I would even say that I, well I know, there was a time when I was a very fast speaker. But that's possibly more to do with the activity inside my brain. There was perhaps more going on.

I was more mentally active. I was, I suppose, you know, especially in early 20s, late teens, early 20s, left school, seeing the adult world for the first time through adult eyes. Although I wasn't an adult mentally or physically, really, when I left school.

But, well I was 15, but that's besides the point, even when I was 22, I was still a kid. I still wore a school uniform, but that was through choice. And I, just things that are exciting, you know, drinking for the first time, going into a pub or a nightclub, or getting into an X-rated movie, or just being able to do stuff that adults do.

Being able to know that you could get a mortgage, or you could get married if you wanted to. Not that that's ever really been an option for me, but you know, just generally, being able to travel on your own, being able to just, you know, conditions being correct, kind of do what you want to do. Not being told what to do by an adult outside of work days.

But I think as I got older, maybe the novelty wore off a little bit. Maybe. You know, some people say, don't they, like, would you go back, if you could go back in time, and go back to being a kid again, but with the knowledge that you have now.

So with all the knowledge you've got now, would you go back? Now, that's a really difficult thing to answer, isn't it? Because if you have all the knowledge that you have now, you're going to know what happens to other people. You know, if I go back to the age of eight, I'm going to know what happens to my granddad. I'm going to know what happens to my brother.

I'm going to know what happens to friends. I'm going to know what happens to my grandmother. I'm going to know, you know, I'll know all that stuff beforehand.

So that, that isn't, that would be a bit of a mind worm, wouldn't it? I think. But then, maybe that's not what they mean. Maybe it's like, would you go if you had the knowledge, or the wisdom? I don't know if I've got any wisdom at all.

I've got wisdom teeth, but as far as wisdom, what is wisdom? I don't know. I suppose wisdom, wouldn't that be giving Vinnie the bone in the bedroom and closing the door, so that I could make this recording without him crunching away in the background? Perhaps, maybe. I don't know.

I'm not sure. I'm going to close this, see, okay. It's, I mean, if I could not have, I wouldn't want to know what's going to happen, but then if I knew what's going to happen with free will, I'd make sure it didn't happen, you know? So, there's certain things we could do, isn't there? To make sure that what happened to other people doesn't happen.

But then, it's a weird one. I don't know, changing the whole timeline. Or maybe I've been watching too many superhero movies.

The multi-universe, the multiverse, and all that stuff. Spider-Man, Doctor Strange, and The Flash have all changed the multiverse, or they've all seemed to have created the multiverse, which is weird. Can't all have created it.

Oh no, it wasn't just them either, was it? It was, oh, what's his name? Yeah, the Avenger movies, that's it, that's what I'm thinking of. But would I change? Would I change? Yeah, I would change my life. Would anybody not change their life? There is that whole thing of, well, yeah, but if you change the past, then you won't be where you are now.

Yeah, that's why I changed the past, so I'm not here now. So that's why I would change the past. And I guess if someone's in a really good position, and they're happy in their life and everything, then by changing the past, it could change where they end up.

So yeah, it's kind of a risky one, I guess. Plus, it'd be really weird to be eight years old and have the intellect or the reasoning ability of a 50-year-old to know what you know at 50, at the age of eight. But the things to avoid, the people to avoid, the planet sounds like all I do is avoid things, potentially.

I don't like to think that way, but maybe that is. God, wow, I'll just spend eight years, I'll be eight years old and I'll just read books. I'd take up boxing, even if it meant sneaking out, not at eight, but as soon as I was able to, even if it meant I'd find someone that boxed or that could teach me.

Maybe my granddad would have taught me if I'd have asked him, because he used to be a boxer. So if I'd have said to my granddad at eight, can you teach me to box? He might have said yes, just as a training thing. He might have might have absolutely loved it.

I don't know. My dad probably wouldn't have liked it, but my granddad might have done. Who knows? We're never going to know.

But definitely when I got to the age of 13, 14, I'd have gone to a boxing club, even if I'd had to have made it up. At 14, I pretty much did what I wanted when it came to sporting things. I did karate.

I did go to a boxing club, but only a couple of times. It was in a different town. It was just, I couldn't be bothered really.

I love karate too much. I just stuck with that. But as a younger man, because you know, I went to a boxing club when I was 20 in London.

When I moved to London and I went in there, I was all excited. I said, I'd like to train. And they said, no, too old, too old.

I'm 20 years old. I could have boxed as an amateur for another 14 years, something like that. I think it's 34 is amateur cutoff, something like that.

Maybe it's at least you can still be an amateur at 30. I'm pretty sure you can. So I could have had a decade of being an amateur boxer, competing in tournaments, and who knows, I might have been okay at it.

But no, because I wasn't a little kid. I just wanted little kids. In fact, I went to two different gyms.

One did say I could go, but for some reason I didn't go to it. This was back in 1989. So I was 19 at that time.

And it was quite local to where I lived. And I think they closed. That's why I didn't go.

I think they had to move. I'm partly making this up, but I did definitely go to one. Yeah, I did.

So that's one thing I'd have done different. I wouldn't have quit with the comedy. I would have kept that going.

What I really needed to do in those days was I've got myself a fairly decent job during the day, like a nine to five job. So if I'd have done that, managed to get myself a fairly good job in a call centre, enough for me to get myself a flat, maybe get on a council list or rent privately, just to have a fairly decent lifestyle, just nothing spectacular.

But then in the evenings and at the weekends, I could do gigs and I could be in a more more stable kind of lifestyle.

And I don't know. I mean, it's too late now. I can't go back.

But I did think it'd be quite an interesting way of doing it. And also what I would have done, what I wish I'd done is instead of annoying everyone, because I annoyed a lot of comedians, I had very little respect in the comedy world because of what I used to get up to. But if they ever spoke to me outside of the gig, you know, which some did, they realised that I was a nice person.

I wasn't the character I was portraying on stage. I was just a young bloke that loved comedy and was trying to find my way, trying to find my voice. I didn't know what it was.

And in some ways, I started to find it in the last three years of doing it. But it took me, you know, a good four years, four or five years before I could kind of really, I think 2005, 2004, 2005, I was probably at my best as far as, yeah, because I was doing political stuff and I was, it was, I didn't have really any bad gigs.

I had a few really good ones and a few okay ones.

But you know, the level was higher, wasn't high, which is higher. And so, you know, it was, it's a very long road it was for me. But what I wish I'd done is asked for help.

I never asked anyone for anything back then. I didn't ask for help really, not for things that were important to me. You know, if I didn't have any money for food, I didn't eat.

I didn't ask generally for money. You didn't ask for help to buy food or I just got by. I managed, I managed, you know, somehow.

And I wish, because I did, I got on quite well with a few of the really top comedians. There's quite a few, quite the ones at the top level are really cool. And quite a lot of the real bottom are really cool.

It's the ones in the middle that I didn't always get on so well with. The ones that were, they sometimes were too judgy. But the ones at the bottom were the same as me.

They were kind of trying to figure out what they wanted to do and they realised how hard it was and it's, they had the respect for each other. And the ones at the top, it had no reason generally to disrespect other comedians because they were already doing really well for themselves. Some of them were on television every now and then, some of them were, you know, just top of the pile of the London comedians.

And I was, I got on really well with quite a few. There's a handful, quite a few, a few. Once I stopped, once I stopped doing comedy and I started working in the comedy club, that's when I became better friends with the comedians because they were seeing me every weekend.

Some of them would keep coming back and they'd be like regular comedians or they'd be coming back because there was a comedy, the comedy room, comics room upstairs where the comedians would come late at night and hang out till early hours in the morning. So I got to know loads of comedians on a more respectful level, like, because I was working there and I'd chat to people, most of them probably forgotten me completely, but I remember them.

One is I remember Jimmy Carr, he was, you might have heard of him, if you're in the UK you'll have heard of him.

He's also, I think he's doing well in America as well. He was just starting out really, like he hadn't been going for very long when I first met him and my friend who owned the comedy club gave him loads of gigs and he also managed him. So he was his manager or his agency managed him and I used to see him like regularly, sometimes like twice a week, a week on weeks on weeks and he, yeah, the whole time.

So for four years I was seeing him fairly regularly, even outside of the comedy hours, I'd see him during the day when he came to the club or whatever and you hear that, the sound of name dropping, but he's probably forgotten me. Not that he should remember me, but he's, I'd probably say hello to him and he'd be like, haven't seen him for 20, 25 years, 25 years?

2002, 2012, 20 years, 20 years is the last time I saw him. So yeah, that's a long time for some people, but for me, 20 years, that's, that's not that long, which is weird to say that out loud.

Doesn't seem that long really, does it? 20 years, the turn of the century. It does actually seem quite a long time ago, thinking about it. A fair bit, a fair bit's happened.

It's just since I've lived here, 2015 till now, almost, it's kind of, it feels a little bit limbo-ish, a little bit, a bit, you know? I'm not sure I feel like I've actually accomplished much in the world, as it were. I don't know, it's kind of strange. I'm hoping that Vinnie doesn't bark because there's a door slammed downstairs, but I did, I told him off earlier and I think he's listened.

So just so much banging of doors. I hope no one comes up here and knocks on my door, please. I mean ever, not just now, I mean just please never knock, please don't knock.

I'm joking, not. So yeah, I'd have asked advice, I'd have asked the comedians, the ones that were really good, advice. And pick their brains a little bit and sort of, well, they'd all seen me perform.

They all knew what I was about, or they knew, at least they knew what I was about on stage. Some of them had seen me loads of times and I had a reputation. Everyone in the comedy circuit pretty much knew about me, not for good reasons.

And I had a notorious reputation, I guess. And it wasn't even that I was offensive and funny, really necessarily, it just, I thought I was, and some people did, but I just wasn't, I guess I just wasn't very good, to be honest. And it was hard to, I've been talking about this, talked about this yesterday, didn't I, going on stage.

I guess I've just been thinking about the past, thinking about the past a little bit, reminiscing this thing. And I'm just not sure, just I think about it and I wonder, what if? And I know that what ifs aren't necessarily helpful, but I still have the what if there, it's still there, the what if. And I was given a few opportunities to actually, to do something like, I've mentioned this a while back, I had a friend who was also a comedian called Helen, her name was, and her day job was, she was a producer of movies, or producer of documentaries and stuff like that.

And at the time I met her, she was working for the BBC. And she left, and I think she was a freelancer. And she offered me, right, after me, this is someone that got to know me, outside of the time we hung out together, went to theatres, no romance available, she told me, she let me know very quickly.

And a little bit embarrassing, because it was, you know, it was in a theatre and I wasn't quite sure where to put the flowers that I was hiding in my jacket. Anyway, I managed to get a refund on the wedding ring. So anyway, she, we got on really well.

She offered me to do a documentary about me. Like she was going to do a documentary, she was going to follow me around, at home, at work, and all the things that I do, go into gigs. And it wasn't going to be a stitch up job, because we were friends.

Like this is after getting to know me, it wasn't like straight away, what do you want to do, just meeting me and thinking, oh, make some money from this weirdo. He's going to make himself look silly, it should be funny for the audience. Which might have been her angle, but it wasn't from a, it was from a, a friend perspective.

She, she liked me, I liked her. And I turned it down. And you know what, you want to know why I turned it, you want to know, you want to know, do you want to know why? Do you want to know why? I didn't want my Nan seeing me, living the life that I was living.

I didn't really want people that I went to school with, seeing me working in really, really horrible factories and doing that kind of work that I was doing. Living in a grimy, horrible room, with no central heating, and just, just the lifestyle, not having any money. And then going on stage and not being very good, really.

Well, I had, I had my moments, but I was still, it was hit and miss. I didn't want my Nan seeing that. I didn't want her seeing me swearing and being naughty, you know.

But it was more than that, I didn't want my Dad seeing me, I didn't, it was embarrassing, I think. I was embarrassed about myself. It wasn't even about the comedy bit.

If you had said, I want to film you on stage, and follow you around just doing comedy, I might have actually done that, providing it was on late at night. Which it kind of would have to be because of the language and whatever, and the subject matters that I used to bring up. But so it never happened, I said no.

And then the next year, she offered me another opportunity. She'd written a script for a sitcom. Bearing in mind, she had the contacts to push this forward, to really, you know, to go places with this.

She was, knew a lot of people, and she said it just needed, needed more comedy, needed... She wanted me to read through it and make some changes. She trusted me. I'm probably the worst person she could have trusted with it.

I didn't do anything with it, but I couldn't be bothered to do anything. She offered me another opportunity to do that, and I turned it down. I kept it at home, I just didn't look at it.

I did look at it, actually, but I didn't. I was just, I had no self-confidence, to be honest. And I was a bit overawed by her, because she was successful, she was highly intelligent, well-off, had her own home.

Just, she was everything that I wasn't, really. And she, lovely person, I'd, I would like to, I don't know what, I forget what her surname was, but if she ever listens to this, she probably won't, but if she ever did, thank you, I do appreciate. It's a long time ago, you know, it's 30-odd years.

But I do appreciate what she did, what she offered me, I just didn't take it. I didn't take advantage of the situation, which could have changed my life. That's what worried me, because it could change my life.

I didn't know how I was going to deal with it, because it might have gone the wrong way, you know. And then, bloody, me and my friend had an idea of, it's basically, it would be like Gogglebox that's on TV now, where people just sit in front of the television and watch movies and watch TV, and just talk about what's going on. This would have been a precursor by about 10 years, maybe more.

And it was our idea, my friend Kevin and me, we thought, oh, this is an idea, because we used to sit there and, I, well, we both thought we were quite funny. I do think we were, together, when we just chat and just talk absolute rubbish. And when other people came around, they laughed, they thought it was funny.

So just, it might have been rubbish, I don't know. Anyway, my friend, Helen, came around and she brought a camera that was, this huge camera, like really expensive camera. And she filmed us, she filmed him, she filmed me.

And she said, yeah, she'd be interested in doing something. And me and him argued. We all got together, and neither of us could agree on what to do.

And in the end, nothing came of it, because me and him fell out. We didn't fall out permanently, but we fell out over him wanting his way, and me wanting my way. And she told, she basically, we were like two little kids, really.

And she got fed up and she left. She just, she gave up on us. So three chances to actually accomplish something within that kind of world, you know, television world, maybe.

I mean, it's, I couldn't do television now. I've got a face for radio. I think it's the term.

I've got a brilliant face for radio, or podcasting. And I thought about the whole, because, you know, I'm trying to reduce my outcome, my outgoings, even though I've still got people asking to borrow money from me, even though I've got no money to lend. But, oh, that was a bit harsh, wasn't it? I, I've got, what at the moment, I do the Spreaker podcast, and I share them on YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook.

So people are listening to them on YouTube. Not a huge audience, but people are. But it's just a picture with the audio.

No video, no moving images, nothing like that. And I think to myself, well, why do I need a moving image? Okay, it's YouTube, it's videos, I understand that. But with what I do, you've got your eyes closed, do you know what I mean? You've got your eyes closed.

So why would you need to look at the screen? If anything, it's better not to have a move, a moving image, really, isn't it? Maybe, I don't know. I clearly don't know. But that's what I was thinking, just like, now, I upload all four versions of each recording, the one without music, with music, five and ten hours.

And I share every single record I make onto YouTube. So people can listen if they want to or not. It's there, but it's, you see, it's just, it's another option.

It's another option. So for those that prefer to listen to the podcast on Spotify, or Apple Podcasts, or Google Podcasts, Stitcher is closing at the end of August, Stitcher. I mean, it's amazing, Stitcher, right? Is, let me have a look.

If I do the last 12 months, and sources. So the last 12 months, I've had 4.1 million downloads. Apple Podcasts is the top, 91%.

How did he manage to move to his statistics from what he was talking about before? How did he do that? And that is a maneuver. It is a maneuver, you're right. It's, yes, Apple Podcasts, 91%.

So it's 3.7 million. Spotify second. So I do still, I love Spotify.

And they are better for podcasts than Amazon Music, I think, at the moment. But Amazon Music, in the last 12 months, I've had 11 and a half thousand downloads. It's literally 0%, you know, out of the amount.

So 11 and a half thousand. So hopefully, once I've distributed my podcasts, I should be getting more listeners, I hope. So Spotify is 80,000.

It's quite a small amount. Podcast Addict, 56,000. Castbox, 45,000.

Stitcher is number 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Stitcher's 5 at 30, nearly 38,000. And that's closing at the end of August. So, my website, 3 and a half thousand downloads from my website.

So I'm thinking maybe I need to try and keep my website. I don't know. We shall see.

We shall see. Wow. No.

Really? You know, I just realized, I didn't even know. I've not even looked at it before. I've not looked at it for ages.

Do you know how many downloads I've had? We don't care. I know you don't care. But you want to know how many total downloads I've had since... 2018? 2018? Five years.

Since I've been doing these podcasts on Spreaker. 14,255,276. 14 million.

Blimey, that's giving me a little buzz. I don't know why. 14 million.

I didn't even know I'd reached 10 million. I just, I don't take any notice of the total. I'm more into looking at the individual podcasts.

So the Deep Sleep Whisperer is one and a half million. The Hypnosis Stress and Anxiety is just reached, just, it's just gone over to four million. Four million and 97,000.

Hypnosis for Sleeping Deeply, 3,907,000. So they're kind of fairly close. Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

It still hasn't reached a million yet. Five years, over a thousand recordings. In different recordings.

It still hasn't reached a million. It's at 732,000. 772,000.

So, to a 10, 100,000. It might be in, maybe the end of next year, I might reach the million. I don't know.

It's, it just variates. I mean, I get more views, more views, more listens, I guess, the more recordings I make. But, I don't know.

Today, oh yeah, I forgot about this. I just want to do this without banging it. Can I do that without banging it? Yes.

Today, I did, what did I do? I've done two recordings today. This is the third. I did a Let Me Boy Your Pain Away, number six.

And that's 52 minutes and 15 seconds long. So, I also uploaded that on the Let Me Bore You To Sleep, just because it's, it's pretty much the same kind of thing, but it is more focused on chronic pain relief. Well, it is focused on chronic pain relief.

It's focused on that thing I can't actually pronounce. And then, I did a Deep Sleep Whisperer, number 506, Magic Carpet. So, and that's 34 minutes long.

So that, yeah, only one of those have been released so far. Because now 9.09, so the one without music's been released. The one with music will be released at 10 o'clock.

Five hour one will be released at one o'clock. And the 10 hour one will be released at 4am tomorrow. So, this recording, this, this podcast, the first one will be released at 10.

Then the second one will be released at 10, 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4, 11, 11, something like that. It'll be released at something. Maybe 9.30, then 11.30, then what, no, 9, 10, 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. I don't know.

It will be released at some time, some point. But the first one about 10 o'clock, I guess. So that's three recordings today.

I don't know how many I've done. I've done a fair few this week, actually. It's been the most productive week I've had in some time, I would say.

I would, I would, I'd like to say I don't know why, but I do know why. I really do know why. So, week.

So, the week started on the 24th, it's now the 27th. So, how many I've done since the 24th? Four, three, one, two, three, four days. Let's have a look.

24th, 24th, 24th, 24th, 24th, right. So, there's one, 121, two, I don't know, I'll take a better way to do it. I'm trying to figure it out, but this is the easier way.

The 24th, I've done one, 24th, 24th, I did the eight ASM. Okay, one, two, three, three, four, five, six, six, six, six, six, six, seven, seven, eight, nine, seven, eight, nine, ten, and I think I said 10, 11 with this one. So, if I think I've got more, right, I think so.

So, I think I've done including this 11 different recordings in four days. So, three, six, nine, ten, blimey, I might have calculated it wrong to be honest, but it looked like about 11, at least 10, but I think it's 11. I know I did three yesterday, I've done three today.

I may well have done three on Tuesday as well, which means I did two on Monday. But I also did some on Saturday and Sunday also. Does that make up for me having all that time off where I didn't do anything for a while? I don't know.

Is there any, is there any making up ever about anything, ever? I don't know. It's hard to tell. But, I'm doing my best.

I'm doing my best mate, I really am. So, even if it is not good enough, I'm giving it a go, I'm giving it a go, I really am. Yes.

So, I'm just looking at adding my podcast to Amazon. It'd be so cool if Amazon, Amazon? If Amazon is... Oh, that's weird. If Amazon really took off.

Not Amazon, the company, because it's doing pretty well already, I don't mean that way. But if my podcast started to take off on Amazon, it'd be groovy. I'd love it if Spotify was a bit more active for my podcasts.

I don't know why they're not. And I'm not sure. I don't know why.

I'd like to know why. I really, really would. But I don't know.

Maybe one day I will. Maybe one, maybe one day, one little day, I really don't know. But until that day, I can't know, I can't know what I don't know, can I? But it would be good to kind of look into it and think, well, how can I, how can I reach a larger audience without it costing me money? How? How, how, how, how, how? There must be a way.

Oh, do you know, Spreaker, they advertised this thing. Where is it? Let's have a look. If I can have a look on there.

Okay. Prime Network, Speaker Prime Network. And this is the announcement.

Have you noticed that some of our podcasts have a cool green badge now? Wondering what it means? Well, this is the new Spreaker Prime Network badge. Okay, so I've not heard of this. This is the first I've heard of it.

Spreaker Prime is a tailored free hosting and monetizing plan designed to enable creators to earn the most money and maximizing ad revenue, increasing exposure. I can't speak, can I? Increase, increasing exposure, increasing exposure. I've got the wrong way around.

And streamlining publishing. A talent pool of iHeart podcasts. The Spreaker Prime Network is home to the best of the best in independent podcasting.

Being on Prime Network means also being visible to potential advertisers and sponsors. Now, even more so with the badge. Also, listeners will be able to easily discover Prime Podcasts on our platform, thanks to this feature.

Would you like to apply and become part of this incredible network? Don't miss this opportunity and click here. So I did. I clicked here.

And I'm clicking there again and nothing's coming up. Maybe it's because I'm on the iPad. Now it is coming up.

Click here. Oh, yes. It's in Italian.

In via la candidatura per Spreaker Prime Network. And so I was on the other computer and I basically I filled the form in. I had to use an online interpreter to find out what they were asking.

And one of the questions is, how many podcasts, how many downloads do you get altogether in a month? And the highest number was 50,000 plus. I averaged, well, let's say I got four, 4.2 million last in the last 12 months. So it's 300,000, 350,000 a month, something like that.

But one of the problems with, and it's not an issue I've got with Spreaker, because I think Spreaker are pretty good. They're really, actually, they're very good. I like them.

Out of all the different podcast hosts that I've used, Spreaker have been the best for me. That's what I found. They've got a thing where you can get, actually, I don't know if they've still got it, but it's a similar thing to the one I just mentioned, free hosting.

But you have to be having like a certain amount of podcasts, downloads, which I do. I'm up in the, probably the higher bracket of downloads, not the highest, but probably doing okay, I guess. But you have to be, did you hear him moaning? You have to be having adverts, making use of the adverts that are available to put throughout the podcast.

And because if I do have adverts, they can only be at the beginning, which means I'm not eligible to have free hosting and to be all the tools that come with it. I am going to yell at you in a minute. Stop it.

I love you so much, but you such a whiner. I've never known a dog to whine, ever. He's like, I think he's a cat.

He's just this moans. You're going to go on the naughty step, Vinnie. You keep this up.

The naughty step it will be. So I better go because he wants to go O-U-T. Lovely.

Why'd you have to flap your ear? Wouldn't it be good if humans could do that? It's not that I want to see humans do it, but I want to be able to do it myself. Turn my head and flap my ears. Brilliant.

That'd be so much fun. Anyway, I'm going to go. Thank you for listening.

Remember to be kind to yourself. You do deserve to be happy. Be gentle with yourself.

And I will be back again tomorrow. Take care. Lots of love.

Bye. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.