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Hello and welcome to let me bore you to sleep. My name is Jason Newland and my sidekick is Vinnie Scrappydew Newland. I've given him a treat so maybe that will shut him up for a bit.
Oh lovely, nice burp. Do you want another treat? Look, you're not having it. Do you want it? There you go, good boy.
Did I say only listen when you can safely close your eyes? And you might think why can you not remember that far back? I do this every day man. Well at the moment. And after a while I kind of forget what I said.
Especially with these podcasts because you may be surprised. But they're not rehearsed beforehand. I don't always know what I'm gonna say before I say it.
Another treat, there you go. There's another treat for little Vinnie. His official name actually is Vinnie.
I personally, Vincent and Vinnie is his nickname. But you know Vinnie Andre Newland. So his middle name is after his brother that he never got to meet.
Although I'm starting to think he's reincarnation because he's got some very similar habits. Very similar. Some of the things he does are just identical to what Andre used to do.
And you might think if you don't know who Andre is, you might think well yeah dogs are similar. Well Andre was a ferret. Very different from dogs.
Different behavior altogether really. And so yeah he's got some very similar habits. So I'm going to start off first of all by giving a big thank you.
First of all I want to say my website is in a process of change. So there's not a lot going on there at the moment. Wait a second don't give me hassle mate.
You just had three treats. Good boy. And so it's not really working at the moment.
It's up but I have to do some work on it. I accidentally made a change that I can't undo. So you can still go on there and if you click on the menu, it will take you to the different podcasts which you can stream on the website.
And it's all the latest recordings. But the actual front page is a bit of a mess at the moment. So that's the first thing I want to say.
I'm also going to do my gratitude journal as well. I'm going to try and get back to doing that every day. And I'll tell you why in a minute.
So the first thing I had a message and I'm going to read it out. It was sent new message. Okay this is on my website.
Hello Jason. Somehow I stumbled across your podcast one night when I couldn't sleep last summer. And I've been hooked ever since.
Your voice lulls me to sleep almost nightly. When I tune in to what you are saying, I giggle at your humor. I particularly liked the accident prone story.
I didn't like it. I've had so many broken bones in the last year. Literally like fractured or broken.
One, two, three, four, five. Just in a year. And I've been trying to get my friends to listen.
But I guess a hypnosis podcast is a slightly hard sell. Yeah, I feel that some people have a. Oh, he wants more treats. Wait a second.
Right. I'm not going to switch it off. I'm just going to get a treat.
That wasn't my bag by the way. It's a chair. Not, not going.
That was the chair. It was like relief. Oh, that big heavy fat bums now got off me.
Okay, get some treats. All right. Thing is, I don't want to just give you treat after treat after treat.
Because then. I don't know. I don't really have an end to that sentence.
Do you want this one? You don't want that, do you? You don't want that, do you? Do you? Well, there you go then. Now go away. Um, yeah.
So let's have a look at the rest of this. I've been trying to get my friends to listen to you. But I guess a hypnosis podcast is a slightly hard sell.
I mean, the let me boy to sleep ones aren't hypnosis. So that might be useful. Perhaps the sleepy, boring objects is not hypnosis.
And some would argue that none of nothing I do is hypnosis. I'm sure there's some people out there that would definitely argue that case. But I do things a little bit different.
I do things my way. And I just did it my way. I just do things in my the way that I want to do it.
And the reason possibly that I'm not quite as. I'm definitely not authoritarian. You know, when it comes to.
It sounds like I'm eating but I'm not. This is for him. I'm not authoritarian because I don't like being told what to do myself.
And I know some people do like to be told what to do in various situations. And the theory with hypnosis is for someone in, say, the forces. They would perhaps potentially.
And this is this is what other hypnotherapists that train and write books say, is they're more likely to respond positively to an authoritarian perspective or way of talking, you know, like telling them what to do and how to feel. I'm not really that way inclined myself. The crinkling is just.
These are treats. These are wag treats. Tasties for dogs and for dogs.
Eight weeks old plus. Tasty bones enriched with vitamins and minerals with chicken and liver. Keeping tails wagging since.
That's funny. Keeping tails wagging since 1986. Chicken liver gravy for extra tastiness.
Oh, well, he likes them. He does like them, but I'm breaking them into four. So I'm just giving him a tiny little bit each time.
And so, yeah, so I'm going to try and focus on what I'm doing. Anyway, thank you for these recordings. They make a difference.
Thank you for having your voice, your cadence, your humor. I don't have a cadence. I had it removed years ago.
Yeah, so thank you. I really appreciate it. That's Julia.
Thank you, Julia. And also, thank you, Julia, for your PayPal gift. I really, really appreciate it.
It was to be fair, I mean, I don't normally talk about finances and stuff, but my bank was minus, I think, £17 yesterday, and the PayPal gift put me above. So hopefully I won't get a bank charge. So thank you.
That was really helpful. Came just at the right time, which is something that I've never done. So, yeah, that was a really lovely message.
And I will respond directly. But the thing is, I don't know whether or not Julia, is it Judy? Julia is listening to the Let Me Boyd Asleep or listening to the hypnosis stuff. And I don't generally read out any messages or anything on any of the other podcasts, like the Deep Sleep Whisper or Relax and Sleep Hypnosis Daily or Stress and Pain Relief or, you know, that podcast.
I don't... He's trying to get onto the table. What are you doing? Are you just going to eat until it just comes out your bum? Until there's no room left in your body? So it starts squirting out of your ears? Me and this little fella here have started to really bond. And I didn't know if it was going to happen.
And it has taken a while. But we started to really, really kind of click. And what was that weird noise? He thought I dropped on the floor.
I'm not dropping on the floor, there you go. He's... I'm trying to teach him to cross the road. So I do a thing where... There you go, it's in bits.
Sorry, mate. Well, I get him to stay before I cross the road. So he's on the lead.
And, you know, I make sure I let the lead slack so I can see whether or not he's just, you know, he's not just staying there because he can't move physically. And then we cross, and I say slowly, slowly, slowly. And he doesn't always listen, I'll be honest.
He still tries to, like, pull me across the road. You do know you've got some food over there, don't you? Yeah? You do know you've got food. Normally, I put him in the bedroom when I do the recording, unless he's asleep.
But I can't just give you all of them. They're too expensive just to give you the whole pack. That's like £4 or something for that pack, maybe more.
There you go. And, yeah, so he's starting to get better. He's starting to walk a little bit slower sometimes when we cross the road.
When we get to the other side of the road, and I say stay. And I say it until he stops. So I won't let him move from the, you know, I keep the leash tight, well, tight as in, you know, not much room.
And eventually he stops and he stays. He's getting better and better. And it's now getting to the point where he looks up at me, waiting for me to say, okay.
And then he carries on walking. Another thing is a couple of weeks ago, I don't know if you might have heard it. I mentioned that whenever I come back from a walk with him, he runs into the living room or the bedroom.
He's still on the lead. And he refused to come back to the front door to let me take the lead off. And I had to just stare at him and say, come here, come here.
And eventually he gave up. He'd walk half the way, then he'd walk the rest of the way. Sometimes he'd lay down and he'd kind of surrender, as it were.
I don't know what you're trying to do. What are you doing? He's trying to get inside my shoe. Well, now he doesn't do that at all.
Never does it. Sometimes he'll still run into the living room. I say, come here.
And he does, straight away. And another thing he used to, when we came in from a walk, we get into the front main door. There's like a, what do they call it? You know, a door that everyone shares in the building.
Like 100 people or whatever. And the first thing he tries to do is go to my friend's house. Because his dog, he wants to go and see his dog.
He wants to see my friend as well. His uncle. His uncle and his cousin.
Well, now, once we get to the other side of the road, and I say, stay. He stays. He looks at me.
And then I say, upstairs for a treat. I shouldn't have said that out loud, because now he's looking at me. Upstairs for a treat.
And now he does. He just runs upstairs straight away. So, you know, it's all kind of coming together.
When we go downstairs, he doesn't run downstairs. Anymore. If he's on the lead.
If he's not on the lead, he's gone. So that's something I need to sort of figure out, you know. And he's so quick.
He runs so quickly. And he's so little. But when he's on the lead, he only walks at the pace that I'm walking.
When we go down the stairs. And he goes halfway down, he waits for me. And I don't know if he can pick up on my feeling.
Because when I walk down those stairs, I'll be honest, I'm still being careful. Because I'll take a few out. I don't really want to be making all this noise when I'm doing a recording.
Maybe he can get in touch with my, you know, my kind of, I don't know what the right word would be. But just being careful, not scared. I'm not scared that I'm going to fall down the stairs or anything.
But I'm definitely a bit more aware of basically what can happen if I do fall down the stairs. And, you know, it's only really happened once in eight years. I've fallen up the stairs a few times, which might sound weird.
I might have slipped down the stairs a couple of times, but like a couple of steps and never I've had too many accidents to remember them all. Never, you know, nothing bad. I just, I mean, the only really, um, the first thing I did when I, it's not the first thing I ever did in my life.
But when I moved in here, I slipped out of the bath and broke my wrist. Now, that wasn't the very first thing I did when I moved in either, you know, painted and there's no treats inside my underpants. What are you doing? That's very strange behavior.
Yes, it is. And maybe that's why he stops halfway down the stairs because he can sense that I'm being well, careful, I guess, maybe nervous. Maybe there's those nerves.
He's feeling the nerves because they say that animals and dogs and stuff can sort of tap into the feelings or, you know, what a person's feeling, empathy and all that stuff. I'm not sure, but he's become more affectionate with me. He's now got a thing where he climbs onto the back of the chair when I sit down, you know, where my head's resting, and he climbs on the top of it and sort of licks my head and plays with my ears and whatever.
So he's more affectionate. He still runs away though when I go to touch him sometimes. If I go to like any, like, don't pick me up, don't touch me.
So, you know, he's still not 100 percent, but I think he's fairly happy being here. And that's really what I wanted. I wanted him to be happy.
And he's kind of like a little orphan. You know, he's lived in four different places, including this place. And he probably, you know, for a while, maybe he still does, but for a while, he didn't know he was going to stay here.
He probably thought this was just another temporary place. But, you know, I can't read his mind, thankfully. There you go, number one, there you go.
But he seems to be fairly content now. It does still bark at the door. I guess that's always going to happen.
It gets extremely excited when my neighbor comes up, especially with the dog. And the pitch is so high. It's honestly scares the squirrels under my bed.
That tickled. Can you do that to my foot again? That was nice. Lick my foot.
It's a weird thing to say to anyone, really, isn't it? Stop it. So, yeah. So thank you for that message, Julia.
Right, so I'm going to... I don't remember where my... Oh, this is actually the book that I've got. Just, I mean, this is my gratitude journal. But I've been using it for other stuff.
Which I need to stop doing. So I started doing this on the 2nd of October. And I did a few days.
I did the 2nd of October, the 11th of October, the 18th of October, the 19th of October last year. 20th, 26th, 27th, 28th, 30th, 31st, 2nd of November. I only did one on 2nd of November out of three.
4th of November. And that was it. So what I'll do is... I'll just get my pen.
And it's the 27th of January. Friday, 27th of January, 2023. 1, 2, 3. You really want another one? Really? That's unlike you to be greedy.
Greedy. What, you want to know what the stats are? Okay then. It's actually, I'm doing this a lot earlier than I normally do.
Part of the reason for that is because on a Friday. Because I'm so old. I like to have an early night.
I like to listen to the radio at 10 o'clock. So sometimes I like to go to bed and listen to the radio. And there's a radio show I like to listen to.
So yeah, that's sort of one of the things I quite like to do. So it's quarter to seven in the evening. It's not that early to be fair really, is it? And I'll do this recording and also do a deep sleep whisper recording as well.
So that will be after this. And I'll get them all ready to be uploaded and I'll do all that stuff. And hopefully I could be in bed by 10 or 11.
And then I've got boxing on tomorrow night. So I will need to do my recordings a lot earlier. Much, much, much, much, much, much earlier.
Sort of the afternoon or maybe even in the morning. So, so far today, why is it not? That's weird. That's not, that's unusual.
Why is it doing that? Okay, now it's back. So I've got 19,000 downloads so far today. So what's that? Seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, one.
There's still six hours left of the day. Till one o'clock when the stats finish. So yeah, good day, I guess.
Yesterday, 25,000. Day before, just under 27,000. Day before that, 24,000.
Day before that, 20,000. Day before that, 25 and a half. There you go.
So it's been a good week, really. Been a good week. The last 30 days, 543,000 downloads.
93% more than the previous 30 days, which is, that's quite a lot, isn't it? That's quite a lot of an increase. And last month, I had 313,000. And this month so far, 490,000.
And there's still, how many more days? 28, 29, 30. Four more days left. So definitely be over half a million anyway.
And by the time I wake up in the morning, probably. So that's cool. It's a nice round number.
It's been a good month. But then I had a really good month last January. And it was, I think last January was the... Don't start squeaking.
You've had nonstop. The whole time I've been talking to you here, I've been giving him little bits of treats. And now he's giving me attitude.
Like, where are the treats? Why can't I have more treats? And they're not treats if they're all the time, are they? That's kind of how I see it. Right, there you go. A little one there.
Now go away for 10 minutes. Thank you. So last December, December 2000, no, January 2022.
And don't worry, this is one to 35. Right, I had 773,000 and a half. So 773,522 downloads in January.
But it did go down. It kind of started off strong. And, you know, I reached a peak pretty much 4th of January.
So it's 41,000 downloads. And then by the time I got, I think the last good day was the 24th of January last year at 25,000. Then it went 21,000 and then down to 17, 15, 12, 12, 14.
So it kind of went down a bit. Let's have a look what happened the next month. We don't want to know.
I know, but I do. Hey, I had the tree in my hand and he just grabbed it out of my hand. OK, February 681,000.
So that's a good month as well, I guess. Blimey, yeah. So the peak of that one was 43,800.
But again, it settled down. I was averaging about 20, 20 plus thousand, 25,000. Because 20,000 is 600,000, 20,000 a day is 600,000.
But there is a reason for that. March 533,000. Yeah, I'm getting all excited.
And I actually did a better month last year. Well, what happened last year is I had to take loads of my recordings off and then I had to redo them and re-upload them. So I was getting really, really good days.
But now I'm making the last few days, I've made two recordings, two different recordings a day. And which is still, you know, it's more than average because I made, I think, 240 new recordings last year. Which, you know, it's not even one a day, is it? But this month so far, I don't know how many recordings have I made.
Now this isn't stats, is it? This is just the amount of recordings. So see how many different recordings I've done since the beginning of the month. Okay, now go away, please, mate.
You just, he's so greedy. The greed is beyond belief. He's so greedy.
I didn't make my first recording till the 4th of January this year. Not my first ever recording, but the first one. So 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30.
So I've done 30 recordings this month. And I mean, considering it's the 27th, there's not that many recordings, is it? Really? Well, it's just over one a day. I'm not sure how many days I've been doing the two recordings a day.
It's only been for the last three or four days, five days, maybe, yeah. Since the 21st, it's been a week. I've been doing two recordings a day for a week.
But before that, it wasn't even every day. Stop it, mate, stop. You're going into the bedroom if you keep misbehaving.
I'll take the bra away from you. So let's have a look. Gratitude journal.
What am I grateful for? I'm grateful that... I'm kind of feeling quite grateful for Vinnie. That he's kind of... I'm just going to put Vinnie, but... I'm starting to realize that he's a good thing for me. He's a good source of a few things, like discipline.
I happen to take him out. I can't lay in bed all day, even if I wanted to. And company, his company.
He's as good as any human that I've known. Apart from when he's being annoying. And then he's just like, every other human.
Stop it. Only joking. Yep.
So that's to Vinnie. The second one would be... I'm grateful that boxing's on tomorrow night. Boxing tomorrow night.
Because I'm looking forward to it. It's nice to have something to look forward to. And I'm also grateful for... Can you hear him slurping away at the water? I'm also grateful... He's sniffing in the air.
What is going on with you? You don't have to have... I mean, what... Would you want an intravenous drip of treats? So it's like basically entering your body the whole time. That sounds weird, doesn't it? They're not treats if you have them all the time. How much can dogs actually understand? Because he does look at me.
He looks at me sometimes, and he turns his head. Moves his head from side to side, which is very cute. I know dogs do that, but he's just... But you know, if you say something like, oh, my dog does this, and you say to him, yeah, all dogs do that.
That's just a put down, isn't it? That's just, there's no need for it. It's like, let someone be happy. Let them be happy with their dog, and... Yeah, all dogs do that.
Everyone's the same everywhere. No, they're not. Not all dogs are the same.
I mean, a lot of it's to do with their upbringing, where they live, their environment, which is where they live, the different places they've lived, the kind of family they live with. If they're around people that are shouting all the time, the dog might be a very loud dog, but more than normal. Potentially, it might be a very quiet dog.
That depends. If the dog might decide to take the high road, and actually say, well, one of us has to act like an adult, I'll keep quiet. What was that noise you just made there? He was eating and burping at the same time.
There you go. All right, this one, I'm gonna chuck it out the window. So, the third thing I'm... grateful for... I think I'm grateful for having this.
You know, having the podcasts, and having something to get up for in the morning, something to look forward to. You know, when I go to bed, now, I know when I read out the stats, and I know it's boring for people to hear. My voice is going croaky.
But for me, when I go to bed, I look forward to waking up, so that I can see what the stats are. And it's something that I've done for quite a few years. The first thing I do is check the stats.
It used to be more about stats on YouTube, back 10, 12 years ago, whatever. What was... how many subscribers that I had, and things like that, how many views that I had. That used to be the thing, really, more than the podcasts.
But now, my main focus has been the podcast for a long time. And although I have been working on making YouTube videos out of my podcasts, and I've made a few. I make... I try to make a few every day, and schedule them for the future.
So I'm up to... I'm not that far ahead, really, now. I'm up to about the 3rd of February. But you can have this, and then you're going to have to... I'm talking to Vinnie.
And then you're going to have to go and just be quiet for a bit. Otherwise, I'll have to put you into the bedroom. And it's not a punishment, because he loves being in the bedroom, because it's a big old bed.
In fact, I'm going to put him in there anyway. Yeah, I'll just put him into the bedroom. It's not bad.
He's been fairly good. As long as I'm feeding him treats, he's happy. So... So that's it.
My gratitude journal for today is Vinnie, Boxing Tomorrow Night, and podcasts. I mean, a podcast, you know, it covers a whole range of topics. A whole range of things.
But I just, yeah... Just giving this out to look forward to, it lets me... I do get a bit excited. If that's strange, then it's strange. But it does excite me.
I don't mean in a... a weird way. Just in a general, like... Ooh! Not... Ooh! You know, just a more like... Oh! Oh! I've got a question though. So my stats... So last month... 313,000.
It was very slow... for the whole of the first of month. Did I not make anything at the beginning of December? I couldn't have done really, could I? And then, it wasn't until the 21st of December, it started to pick up. And then, the 26th, 27th, 28th, 29th... Basically, as soon as I hit the 21st of December, everything kind of jumped up for some reason.
So was I not making anything in December? I must have been, surely. December... December 2022. Yeah, I was.
I was making recordings in December, but no one was listening. I did one on the 1st. I did one on the 2nd.
I did one on the... I did... Well, I did two on the 2nd. I did one on the 4th. I did one on the 5th.
I did one on the 6th. I did one on the... Did two on the 6th, in fact. Oh, okay.
And then, I didn't do anything until the 15th. Nine days? Why didn't I do anything for nine days? Fractured back. Well, that's the one.
Yeah, yeah. That would explain. I think I had a... I think I might have had a cold or... I don't know.
I can't remember. Why didn't I... Anyway, yeah. So, that's a weird one.
How strange that I really didn't have a good month in December, yet the best month I've ever had in the last five years or whatever, was the previous December, 2021. I had nearly, I think, over 800,000 downloads. But last month... Very slow.
Very, very slow. Maybe just December is a month where people were busy doing other things. I just didn't... I mean, some days I was doing two recordings and I still wasn't getting even 10,000.
Blimey. I don't want to go back to that. Wow.
6,000 on the 1st of December. It's rare that I get below 10, so it's just... Why? Maybe I got disheartened and that's why I just stopped doing stuff for a little while, because nothing was happening. And then on the 21st, suddenly, bang! I started getting more.
Oh, I don't know. I don't know. But it's still better than November.
Like, all the way across... September is the lowest month for the whole year. But then I was busy. I didn't do recordings much in September.
It was... That's when I had the chest infection. So I literally... I don't think I made any recordings. I might have made a couple and I didn't make any recordings for about two weeks.
So yes, that's why September was like that. But January... Brilliant start to the month. Or to the year, rather.
January is a brilliant start to the month. Yeah, it's a really good start to the year. In fact, it will be... Yeah.
I hope it stays that way. Blimey. Wow.
Let's see. Yeah, you want to know how many I've done all together? Yes, it's the start of... I can't even be bothered. Since I've been using Spreaker... Was it November 2018? I've got 12 million plus.
So yeah, that's all right, isn't it? While it's track now. I'd like to have just a million. I'd like to get to a million a month.
Just for now, by the end of the year. A million a month. That'll be handy.
And then... Well, actually, I'd like more than that. I'd like... I'd like a hundred thousand a day. And then I'd like a million a day.
Just a nice round number. Nice and round. Just like me.
Just like me. So yeah, it's... I got woken up. I didn't get woken up.
I did get woken up, actually. He's... This morning, he was barking. But it was more like not full-on barking.
And he's in the living room at night. And I'm in the bedroom. Because I can't be woken up by him when he's on the bed.
It just is so loud. And it just... It just, it just, it just... Too much. So he's in the living room at night.
When I'm in bed. And he was barking. But it stopped after a little while.
But it wasn't full-on. It was more like... I think he was barking. And... Then I got a text.
And it was from a friend saying... Give me a ring when you get up. And I thought it was important. So I called.
And I'm worried and that. And... And I just... I had a different start to my day to what I normally have. You know, I've got a very... I like a routine.
Like a routine. And it suits me. And I think it's good for me.
Especially with... It's just good for me to have a routine. I'm not like completely rigid. What I am now.
No, not completely rigid. But it's just a general routine. So I can... Structure.
Structure. That's it. That's kind of what I'm looking for.
So I have a routine when I get up. You know, I take Mary Poppins out for a walk. And... Then I get back.
And I have my breakfast. And watch a bit of TV for half an hour or an hour. I like to watch an American sitcom.
Because I've been getting up later. There's not a lot on. So I generally just maybe go and watch something online.
And then I can start getting to work. You know, just do a few bits and bobs. And go and check things.
And have a bit more of a thorough examination of what's going on online. With my stuff. And I'm in a process, as I said, of making YouTube videos.
And that's quite time consuming. It's not hard work. It just takes a while to do it.
And I've got a lot of recordings to turn into videos. I don't know if you can hear that. He started barking in the background.
Well, I just checked and there's nothing going on. He's barking. And I don't know what he's barking at.
It might be because I've got the window open in the bedroom. And he might have heard someone in the garden or something like that. He barks when there's people in the garden.
He barks when someone knocks on a neighbour's door. As well as my door. Sometimes he barks when people walk in the front door.
And other times, I really don't know why he's barking. And once he starts, he can't seem to stop. It gradually gets lower.
It's like, and it just gets lower and slower and slower like he's winding down and I don't know really what's going on there but he's yeah he's stopped now so I guess he's he's all right I mean part of the reason I have the windows open other than to air out the place and you know keep the place fresh and that is so that he's got background sounds I want him to become accustomed to the background sounds and it don't seem to be working but I want him to I mean in during daytime there's roadworks
going on in the background there's dogs barking people coming in out the gate so he hears that stuff and a lot of the time he doesn't react so I want him to get more used to it and so that he's not bothered by it like when the post gets delivered because he's not bothered by that because he knows what it is and I guess this is going to take him time to become accustomed to all the different sounds and the different smells and you know he can smell each person that comes into the building I
imagine so he knows who's who he'll know he'll get to smell know the smell of the postman the smell of the people that live here or the scent is that a better it's a better word than smell isn't it I smell but the scent to be able to remember the scent recognize the scent of each individual person I love when people say I don't smell we all smell everyone smells everything smells of something smell is not a bad word it's a sensory word it's not a bad word you smell like we all smell of something
you have a scent I'm okay with that I don't mind the scent I just don't want to be smelly I didn't say you were smelly it's just everything smells we all smell we all smell it's weird isn't it we all smell because we have noses and we can smell things I had a lot of gas lately so yeah there's not really a lot else going on I had a bit of a sleep earlier I don't know if I mentioned I had a delivery from Amazon and I used them last week or the week before I
think it was last week and they were great they delivered to stuff in cardboard bags and didn't even knock on my door and they left it there or they might have knocked but it was just there and they didn't disturb me and it was like perfect perfect perfect perfect so I ordered some more stuff this week earlier in the week completely different experience knock on the door even though I said don't disturb me you know I actually ticked the box I said just leave it outside don't disturb me and they he knocked nothing with him
no bags nothing you're gonna help me he said I said what you're gonna help with the delivery so there was 17 brown bags most of them pretty much quite light apart from a couple of ones that had frozen stuff in so I got my neighbors some frozen food and a few bits as well and he basically he was in a car in the state so it was a long car and he he he was like looking for the stuff so I'm out I'm standing outside in the cold in which is basically my pajamas because I
don't you know when I'm indoors I don't dress up I don't wear a suit and a tie when I'm indoors and and there were people around that really didn't want to be down there I didn't have my hat on either so my hair's all over the place and I'm just standing there like what do you what do you want what you know what's going on I said you ready he said no not yet and he all he did he started taking the stuff out of the car and put it on the pavement for me to
carry into the building I said so I'm basically delivering it myself am I he said what I said I'm basically delivering it myself he didn't didn't really get what I was saying I don't think and I've told this story before haven't I I remember yeah I think I did but I just I'm never going to use them again ever because of that and it's such a shame because it seemed like quite a good service and I can order the same day providing I all get you know get online fairly early I can get it delivered
the same day can't do that with the supermarkets directly even though this is connected to a supermarket there's Amazon and I don't know what the supermarket is one at one of the supermarkets so yeah that's a shame I just it wasn't a nice experience the second time and part of the reason I get delivery other than the fact that I live in the middle of nowhere and I can't really travel I can't you know I can't carry stuff I haven't got a car I can't carry stuff more than a couple of carrier bags you know
which is maybe maybe a couple of days worth of food so I have to get a delivery and that's what I need to do unless I was going out every single day and getting the bus and going all the way into the place to go to the supermarket which is a bit of a journey bit of a journey oh yes and the other reason is because of my back not just like my fractured back that's you know getting pretty much healed now but my lower back that I've had problems with for years that's it's just
quite it's quite difficult to keep bending over and picking stuff up and that's one of the main reasons I get deliveries and it's pointless it's useless to me if I'm actually carrying stuff myself so I'm not sure what to do maybe maybe deliveries are too large I need to start getting more more deliveries but a less amount each time and perhaps the delivery people would be a bit more open to carrying the stuff I mean I you know I realize it's one heck of a hard job physically to be a delivery driver you know if
you're delivering groceries I understand that but I'm pretty sure they knew that when they took the job on you know I couldn't do it because of my back but I could have done it when I was younger in fact I probably would have enjoyed it when I was younger I loved lifting heavy stuff it was a challenge so you know it was but I couldn't drive so I wouldn't have been much good but if I could drive I could have been a quite good delivery driver I wonder what other things I could have done I
don't know I was just lucky that I found modeling you know if I hadn't been discovered and gone on to be a supermodel I you know I could have had a completely different life but I'm not even sure if I'd missed the fame and the glory of being a supermodel but then you know I don't know any different now after 30 years of being a supermodel it's it's like just like another like any other job really in a way it's not very much different to you know I don't clean out drains and sewages guys it's
it's it's not much different it's just it's another job and I just happen to haven't been born so beautiful it's it's not my fault is it so yeah I didn't really have any choice but to go into modeling I mean it's quite a superficial place quite a superficial environment to be around I mean the amount of people that think they look really good when they really they got no don't know anything as good as me they're very superficial oh look how I look my hair their hair is not even five percent as good as mine
they're so superficial so egotistic always trying to compete with me and they can't they go seriously they're very I don't know what the right word is very cocksure of themselves very arrogant very arrogant thinking that they can outdo me in the looks department the idea that they can become a supermodel like me and they haven't got a chance I feel a lot of jealousy there and a lot of exaggeration I think when they exaggerate about themselves you know I've done this I've done that look what I've done I don't do I don't I created modeling
I often say to people some people find it funny so I guess I'm yes it's a good joke as well but it can be a little bit shallow a bit of a bit of a shallow environment as well being around other models yeah it can be I mean some models really like oh all they want is to have the complexion I've got and I try and say to them you never you just don't have the genes you're just not blessed the way I am they don't understand because they're not deep thinkers about the way I
am that you don't think deeply they're very shallow you know so what on earth am I talking about how did I get to be the supermodel I don't normally talk about that part of my life so I'm gonna go gonna go I really am gonna go thank you I'm gonna go now I really am so remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy be gentle with yourself gentle lots of love bye
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.