Read along
Complete transcript
Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland. This is... Boy, you're asleep. I don't know what happened there.
This is... I got stuck on the S for some reason. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. Hello? Bliming, blimming, bliming thing shining in my glasses.
I've stepped away from the... as far away as possible from the camera so that the... and from the bright light that's shining at me. I got the light because I need the light. Need the light otherwise you won't be able to see me.
Well you would but it wouldn't be as... I don't know if it is clear. Hopefully it's okay. But I don't like the shining in the glasses bit.
You know there's this theory on YouTube because I'm recording this on video as well as my podcast. So hello to everyone listening on the podcast and hello everyone watching on YouTube. And thank you for those people that are subscribed.
Wow that was a whistly. I've got a bit of a whistle sometimes. Look at that whistle when I talk.
Had some complaints about that in the past. I mean that's like someone saying I don't like your pink face. Do something about it.
Well I can't. That's the way I talk. I have a pink face and I talk with a... sometimes.
Maybe that's... I don't know. It might be the way my teeth are arranged in my mouth. Like some kind of accordion.
I don't know. I've got a little bit of a lisp sometimes. Don't like it when you got a... well you wouldn't say that to someone with a lisp would But I don't like your lisp.
You know what I mean? Yeah. No. I remember someone said don't like it when you drink water.
This is about 10 years ago. I've been doing this for a long time by the way. Since 2006.
I've been making videos on YouTube since 2007. But the current YouTube channel is a new one. My other one was just way way too successful.
Had to get rid of it. I couldn't just... You know when something's just too good? It has to be destroyed. That's what I think about whenever I see a chocolate bar.
It's too good. I'm gonna poo that out. I have to eat it.
So what was I talking about? I don't know. I'm distracted by that stupid glare. I think if I take my glasses off I can't see nothing.
You know I'm not wearing glasses for the fun of it. Although they are fun. So I don't know.
There's always ways around these things. I think it's a case of maybe I need to get some lighting. A lighting system.
That's the one thing I don't have. I've got lots of things. I've got a girlfriend.
I've got a massive dong. Where did that come from? If I had the lighting then I could arrange it in a certain way as to give light but to not also shine on my glasses the way they are now. So that I could be like that the whole time.
So there's no glint. Because that's off-putting to me. But then you've got my whole face to deal with.
So at least if the face is distracted have a look down at the super sexy body of mine. That'll make you feel better. Or better still close your eyes and go to sleep.
Because that's what this recording is for. Is to bore you to sleep. By just waffling on about nothing for roughly an hour.
Yeah this woman said I don't like it when you drink water. It's about 2011. Don't drink.
You know what in the video I made it was it was like a really nice video. It was around 50 minutes long or an hour long and it was all about letting go of the past and getting in touch with your self-love and everything yeah. But I was in the middle of a the worst chest infection I'd ever had.
So I was probably I was on the you know on the recovering period. So I was over the worst of it but I was coughing a lot still. So what I decided is I had this little period when I wasn't coughing so I thought I'll make a video why not.
And I remember that making that video and sitting in a chair trying my best not to cough. And you know I've never been the best editor in the world of videos. So it's very basic kind of video editing that I do.
I don't want to deal with a video with lots of cuts. And I like to just do a video and just just upload it as it is really. Maybe put a little bit of an intro yeah a little bit of type writing or something.
But outside of that I've never been that interested in editing. Which is something perhaps I should look into. But I remember I was sitting there and I was like I've got a cough.
So I kept having to have little sips of water in order to keep my throat nice and damp. Not as damp as the the room I was living in. And that was kind of what I was doing.
And this lady or I don't know could have been a man or woman who knows said I don't like it when you drink water. I don't like the sound of it. So why are you telling me? What possible reason would you have to tell me about that? Because you were drinking water and I don't like it.
I don't like it when you drink water because I don't like the sound of it. So? I mean if that is at the top of your worries in life you are damn lucky. You should wake up every day smiling and singing.
If that's at the top of your concerns.Me drinking water whilst making a video. You are so fortunate.
You really should be skipping and doing cartwheels all day long. Not bad. So yeah.
I'm not sure when my last video was. My last Let Me Boys Asleep podcast episode. It's 6th of January.
It's the 11th of January. No it's the 10th of January. Sorry.
10th of January today. So it's been four days. I am going to be doing these more regularly every day again.
Because that's how I normally do them. But I've been so busy with my podcast. Uploading videos and podcasts.
This is annoying because I now talk about videos and podcasts. Yeah I'm talking about my podcast. That's what I'm aiming at.
I've been doing the 5 and 10 hour podcasts of older episodes to upload them. Get that out the way to replace the recordings that I deleted. At the same time I'm trying to upload those onto my website as well.
Which then will once that's done. And it's very time consuming. It's I mean just to upload 25 episodes.
Not even 25. From 25 to 60. 25, 35, 45, 55.
35 so that's 70 I guess because you've got two recordings each. It's taken two days so far and it's still not completed. So it's very time.
And that's with four devices running at the same time. Uploading. Now admit that it's not a 24 hour a day project or operation because I'm a human.
I'm not a machine. You know I'm not doing it all the time. But when I do do it I'm trying to upload them you know over time.
It's just very time consuming. I'd like it all to be done but it's very tedious. It's very boring.
And there's only so much. You know I do fall asleep doing it. I go from one from the iPad to the phone to whatever.
Just like okay now upload these ones. Now upload these ones. And then at the same time on my laptop here I'm making new pages on my website and then uploading putting the information in the embedding the player for that particular podcast episode.
And if it's got a video adding that as well. And then uploading the recording so that people can download them as well for free. So you can stream and download on my website jasonnewland.com. And it's so time consuming.
And it's weird because I've spent hundreds probably hundreds of thousands of hours on my website over the last blimey what 17 years. I mean there's been periods when I've gone weeks when all I've done is work on the website. Like literally all day every day for weeks and weeks.
And at the end of it I'd never want to see my website again. I've had enough. I've had it right up to here right up to my right nipple.
Just don't want to see no more websites. Now I'm not at that position yet with my current website because I'm quite happy how it's going. It's pretty much how I want my website to be right now.
It you know it's organized in a way I want it to be organized. It's just not complete. There's not all the stuff on there that I want to be on there.
So you know at the moment let's have a look. I'm now uploading the relax sleep hypnosis daily 10 hour recordings. So out of 149 recordings or episodes I'm now up to number 79.
So I've uploaded 79. So once I've done that once I've finished what's that a 79 80 90 what's that 49 it's over 30 isn't it. So once that's done that means all of the relax and sleep hypnosis daily recordings are all updated on the website and I'll start making new recordings for them.
So you know there is a plan it's not even that vague it is a is a specific plan at the moment is to make all the recordings to make them all all right good. Also what I should say is on my website now whenever I make a video at the same time as a podcast which possibly will be more and more. It's weird because this part of me doesn't want to the reason because I have to I have to make myself look glorious.
You know with a podcast I can basically do it with a dead squirrel on my head and you know smoking a cigar knocking one off whatever yeah we're just saying I could basically do it wearing a straw coat looking like a scarecrow and it wouldn't matter because it's it's just audio no one can see what I look like but on a video there's a degree of kind of having to get ready wearing a clean t-shirt this is a clean t-shirt might not look clean but it is clean on the outside on the inside it stinks
that doesn't and it shouldn't do I've only been wearing it a week it shouldn't be smelly yet so the video on my website the video is actually on the page and then underneath the video is the podcast episode that you can play so you can watch the video or you can listen to the audio podcast now the quality of the sound and it's probably it should be fairly good on the video and hopefully but it's I think even better on the podcast so depending what you're looking for and I know that it's it's a bit
weird that someone would tell you that like well the sound on a video is absolutely rubbish don't listen don't watch the video listen to the podcast this sounds better well I'm not saying that it's just the setup's a little bit better I mean it's pretty good on the video as well I mean this is a this is a damn good microphone I'm using here there's no rubbish one this ain't no uh USB thingamajig you know this is no Blue Yeti no Blue Yeti crap this is no Blue Yeti is fine I had two Blue Yetis
I just don't think they sound very good um on video I mean mind you I've got I don't know if you can see behind me I've got a lot of soundproofing on the walls in this building in this room rather and so hopefully that would um keep the sound echoeyness to a minimum but this this microphone it's a really good microphone and this one they're both the same make I've talked about microphones too much I'll stop now I want to talk about them it's weird this is what are you looking at staring me right at
the face I forget it's there but I've moved back I could move my hands a little bit but it's minimum it's without banging the microphones but that one is a bit close it's a little bit it's in this space a little bit you know how about a little bit of distance darling a little bit of you know two foot isn't it isn't that the rule right in my face but uh I shouldn't get having I shouldn't get into no I shouldn't get into an argument with a microphone that's probably a bit immature yeah so on
my website on the pages for each recording if if I can continue this way then each page will have the video and then underneath the podcast episode and also you can add it to the car and you can download the podcast or you can download the mp3 recording for free it's free everything I do is free ain't no charges for nout all I do is for free it's a free service has been for I don't know how many years now what's 2006 January 2006 I started this whole little journey of mine so what is it
now January 2014 is it something like that I just realized that my telephone I'm gonna turn off the ringer just in case anyone rings me oh it's turned off good I know it's okay with the audio with the podcast it's easier to edit than the video I mean for the video I just want to upload it as it is and that's part of the fun part of the fun of it is to just be as it is you know what I mean no well just to have the video from start to finish as it is
blah blah blah blah blah no I still don't understand well the more time I spent the more time I spend editing a video I didn't say the word editing editing the less time I've got to oh you know what I've been doing blue sky I've been watching blue sky on Disney plus what a great TV show I was really surprised and I've got to give it to Disney plus they do go for quality rather than quantity and there's not I mean there is a lot of stuff on there and a lot of stuff if you
search there's more than you realize I think more than I realized but they go for quality and Amazon don't even seem to try Amazon clearly they're you know they're great customer service when it comes to when you buy stuff for them from them and they deliver quickly most of the time and you know good prices whatever all that stuff when it comes to Amazon Prime the video service the video whatever it's almost like I don't give a shit like they're just not bothered they'll put stuff on there that's really good sometimes like their own TV
shows that they've made or a film a movie they've made but it's now and then so much of this stuff on Amazon is like B movies from the past really really and they mix it all together so there's no way of knowing if anything's any good or not because they'll put together um like a really really good movie maybe you haven't heard of but it's really good next to something from 1973 um that involves sausages so it's just like how do you judge so you know I kind of give up a little bit on Amazon
Netflix I think their their model is just chucking as much shit against the wall as possible with the hope that some of it would stick and a lot of it does stick a lot of their stuff's really good not all of it I mean during the uh the thing that we don't mention on here the last couple of years because a lot of American well I guess all worldwide TV shows have uh they're not being able to make new seasons or you know episodes of video they'll be able to make new seasons because of I
guess shutdown lockdown whatever and I noticed that Netflix and they're still doing it is they started importing TV shows from all over the world you know Japan, China, Norway, basically everywhere as long as there is either subtitles or dubbing now some of the stuff is great some of the stuff's brilliant but I was just surprised at how much of it there is now I'm not a big fan of subtitles but I broke through that little that little Veruca um with Narcos or Narcos Narcos and I watched both of the Narcos uh the one the original
one and then the one in Mexico and both of those had three season or three seasons each so I watched a lot of episodes with subtitles I got used to it and for anyone that hasn't watched it and if you I guess you gotta have you gotta enjoy that kind of stuff is some of it's pretty horrible but I just enjoyed it it was it was for me it's yeah I thought it was really good now I put off watching it because I don't like subtitles now I had a much smaller television in the past
now I've got a big television and which means because I had with my eyesight deteriorating um I wasn't able to see the subtitles on the smaller television now that I've got myself a big television I can see the subtitles clearly which means it opens up possibilities for other movies like what was that one that was it Chinese and the one that won an Oscar uh I forget the name of it where they all basically the whole family end up working for the it's basically one big con and they're just disgusting people um taking advantage of
you know this this man and his family and working for them and you know I didn't see the whole thing because again I was watching on a tiny telly it was an Oscar winner so it's a great film famous but I couldn't read the subtitles because the tv was too small now I've not gone back to revisit it yet which I should do really because I'll be able to it'll be a lot easier now because I'm used to watching subtitled films or tv shows not that I want to spend a lot of time doing that
because the problem with watching stuff with subtitles is you can't do anything else the amount of movement in the loft and in the walls is ridiculous here so you can't I can't do anything else I can't do anything that involves me eyes so you know if I'm watching a movie or tv show like normal just in the language that I understand then I can take my even if I'm not even if I'm really into it I can still take my eyes off the screen for a couple of seconds while I press the upload button on
one of the thingies you know if I'm doing something else at the same time if I'm not as into it as you know then I can do other things so it's more like I might give it 40% of my attention but if it's got subtitles I have to give it 100% of my attention and I don't know that annoys me it's just like I don't it's a bit too demanding I mean it's like I'm watching this but this is like being in a relationship I don't it doesn't doesn't suit me you know don't tell me
I have to I have to pay attention I don't want to pay attention but you have to because otherwise there's no way of knowing what's going on if you don't read the subtitles unless you can speak Spanish or Chinese or Japanese or whatever the language is that's being spoken that was a stupid that sentence wasn't needed was it that last bit obviously I thought I did like Ragnar Ragnaroff which is I think a Norwegian TV show about Thor so I like that a lot and oh the first thing I watched with subtitles ever that I
actually watched the whole thing the TV show and it was what was it called it was based in Norway it was the bloke that was in the Sopranos who was the owner of the strip bar and he played a gangster who goes into witness protection and ends up and deciding to go to Norway and it's the place where they had the winter olympics Lillehammer Lillehammer that's it and I wanted to watch that because he was in it years ago but I couldn't put up with the subtitles first of all I didn't understand why there was
any subtitles considering he is a star why they just just didn't have people just speak in English but with an accent just get you still get Norwegian actors but just one and they all could speak English because at times they all did speak English at different times so why not just have it as a have them speak in English because I assumed that the audience that it was aiming for would be you know English speaking particularly America because of the Sopranos and him playing another kind of gangster character America would have been his audience that's
what I thought maybe they were aiming the audience at Norway potentially I don't know but either way it's brilliant I watched it and had subtitles and I the first time I tried to watch it with subtitles I couldn't I remember I think I threw a banana at the television in protest and I missed the television because I'm practically blind but the television was the television actually smaller than a banana and it has legs and it dodged so I I couldn't watch it I said no it's ridiculous I want to watch it I really like him
as an actor and I liked his the character wasn't really any different from the one he played in the Sopranos really a bit gentler but still you know because he it's kind of the same like it was like that he's got no neck that's my impression of him he's a DJ you know well he was he's now 90 but I he's not 90 I like him and what's weird is because it's three tv shows all interconnect there's Ragnarok Ragnarok there's Lilyhammer and there is um what's it called it's basically it's a comedy about vikings nor
nor what are they called anyway it's a comedy I forget the name of it but a lot of the actors are in all three of those shows and in fact the main character who's in Lilyhammer like the other than obviously the man himself his sidekick in the whole show for all three seasons or whatever also was in the the tv show no I can't remember the name of it it's one of the funniest tv shows on Netflix in my opinion and it's it's about vikings it's about the vikings and it's uh nor I remember the
name of it I could look it up but I can't be bothered I know it's not helpful but I'm not trying to be helpful anyway you're supposed to be going to sleep well we've got 36 minutes are you asleep yet I don't know nor something anyway Norseman Norseman that's it Norseman that's a tv show very funny it's three seasons of that very funny it's very funny dialogue it's funny physical visual funny stuff but the dialogue is just brilliant the conversations that they have is just ridiculous and it's really good honestly it's really funny so Norseman
so a lot of the a lot of the actors are in all three of those shows so Norway I guess they're and it's quite a small country I know I've got quite a few people listen to me from Norway so lots of love to you all I'd love to visit one day and marry one of you yes I do I love the Norwegian accent I do I don't know what it is about it but I really really like the Norwegian accent and I'd quite like to I'm thinking of maybe marrying someone from Norway but only
someone that's a fan of what I do because it makes it much easier because but we would both be able to talk about the same thing that we love me the talk about the what I want to talk about is myself I don't want to talk about anything else so um I think if someone watched my videos or listened to my podcasts I've been doing it for years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years and years this let me bore you to sleep podcast this is this is the
fourth year now I think um and this is episode 788 it's quite a lot of episodes isn't it that's quite a lot 788 and I I think if someone liked me then you're pretty much put up with anything because you're gonna get to know roughly what I'm like and you know if you're there thinking yeah I will marry him I will marry her well you know there are a few rules first just let you know that um first of all if you look like me don't contact me I don't I don't want to date myself
um I'm pretty anti-social I think probably in a way I'm not not really into being around people I'm very solitary a very solitary person but that's not all the time you know I like to have human contact for 20 minutes every now and then but there's a limit I think my limit is about an hour at a time but that doesn't that's not for you know if I was in a relationship with a lady then I guess um I don't know I kind of class a relationship as I suppose a little bit like a virus
in in a sense if you start to get immune to it you start to sort of become accustomed to it and it doesn't cause so much pain and suffering maybe after a while you kind of become accustomed to it I don't know if that's probably not a good description of a relationship is it I don't know how that well that would go down in a catholic church I don't know just anything like something new that's something that's not very pleasant no that's not a good example but you get used to it you get um accustomed
and I think that's probably how a relationship would be with me is unless I met someone that's straight away just like wow because I think it would have to be because I'm grumpy old man now I think I would um it need to be someone that transformed my life someone should need to be you would need to be someone that has certain um attributes I guess that maybe I'm lacking you know they say that don't they sometimes people get together and you like have someone that's a bit flippity floppity minded and absent-minded and maybe forgetful
and then you get someone else that's like extremely anal and you know remembers every single thing and has everything written down and very organized and maybe those two people getting together sounds horrible doesn't it but um it's maybe they complement each other and the problem with that though is how would that work with someone like me who clearly is perfect I don't know so perfect I guess I suppose I don't know what what things I'm lacking in there's physical things I'm lacking in but I don't know someone that could cook like proper food healthy food
and I guess someone that was really into like nutrition and stuff that'd be quite handy to have because um I'm not so much into that as what I should be or could be or need to be oh by the way how this is information you don't have well let me just see if I can get this without banging stuff okay I want to do I'm going to move the microphone for them right I went to the doctors uh last week and basically I had two appointments now when they told me I had an appointment they
phoned me up to say well we need to do your regular MOT there's a regular physical health check part of the reason I think they might just give it to everyone over 50 I don't know but I also I've always had like a regular yearly check because of being bipolar and being on I guess the medication and checking that I'm okay in that so anyway for whatever whatever reason it is they give it to me they called me up and I had two appointments only told me I had one appointment at two turned out I
had one at 2 30 as well so I had the appointment I went in and my doctor's surgery tell me am I wrong okay am I just being pedantically annoying am I just am I the way am I the am I in the wrong here tell me I'm not but you know just okay here's what I'm gonna say in the doctor's surgery when you walk in and first of all you know there's the signs put on your bloody masks you mug there's that so you have to put your masks on first and um there's a
thingy too that you can use to clean your hands before going in which is good because I actually did a poo earlier uh because that's why I didn't bother washing my hands because I've like I've done a poo I'm gonna leave the house get on the bus travel to the doctor's surgery what's the point washing my hands now I'm gonna have to use the sanitizer when I get to the doctor's surgery so it's so grim isn't it just the idea of it and the fact that so many people both men and women don't wash their
hands after going to the toilet I'm talking a lot a lot of people now I I know you know my friend base mainly is women I don't get on that well with men I get on all right with them but I'm not into I struggle with the macho like because I'm the least macho person there is I just you know I'm not into all that stuff it's just bullshit and I just get on better with women so I've spoken to men and women about this it's something that I've observed in public toilets and I'm not
I don't hang around public toilets a lot you know I only want to want to get a blowjob I don't hang around public toilets a lot you know apart from when I want to earn some money no I don't spend a lot of time in public toilets but or but when I was just so often train public toilets in train stations on trains actually not on trains you can't see what people do on trains but people just walk out not just from doing a wee wee okay because there is a way of if you really
maneuver yourself there is a way of doing a wee wee a whiz a pee pee without touching it there is now it's I know it's different for ladies because you have to you have to uncrease it or something I don't know because I don't know where you hide your willies but you have to pull it out of um but you know I know it's difficult wiping and stuff but there is a way of doing it if you're really careful now I I'm just gonna say that I don't know the percentage of men that do that
I'd say maybe five percent I've not done I've not done a survey I'll be honest but I just think maybe five percent are that skilled now I'm I can do that but I always seem to end up having to touch it with one finger now sometimes I think well that's one finger do I really need to wash my hands just because of one finger and you could argue saying yeah but what about the door handle where I never use my hands to open door handles I use my elbows um unless it's a like a knob
unless it's a knob so when I'm in a public toilet and I have to touch the knob touch it and turn it and caress it until everything becomes happy no so sometimes you know there's no way of avoiding touching the knob in the public toilets but I generally try to use my elbows if at all possible but in a public toilet with the locks and stuff you generally have to touch it with your hands so I wash my hands the only time I wouldn't wash my hands is if I was in in a train station
and the train's called you know it's announced and I have to get on the train and you know there's no you're like well I'm gonna wash my hands or wait another hour for the next train actually no it's wash my hands or wait another hour no it's wash my hands and wait another hour or just get on the train so what I do is I get on the train and I just make sure that I touch every public surface possible to spread um I mean I I try to keep my hands clean the rest of
me is filthy my hands spotless honestly I have the cleanest hands always always washing every time I get home even if I only go outside to to go outside to lick the window out there in the hallway I always come back and I clean my hands always wash me hands because I just have a rule now I reckon most people don't most people are unhygienic when it come I I don't know if it's true I've just decided that yeah I don't think people are that that hygienic with hand washing maybe more so but let's face
it there was public television adverts for the public to teach them how to wash their hands if you have to be taught how to wash your hands and you're over the age of three years old then you're a little bit retarded aren't you let's face it if you can't don't know how to wash your hands after the age of three and if you don't wash your hands if you after going to a toilet then you just need to be locked up somewhere which means there'd be about worldwide what maybe 5,000 people walking around so it
wouldn't be uh probably a good idea to do that but oh I don't understand how to wash my hands how is it water what put the soap in my mouth in my ear how do I do it oh really it's not that complicated I knew how to wash my hands I didn't do it but I knew how to from a very early age but I didn't do it I'm just saying I'm not you know I think I only really I used to wash my hands after doing a big smelly poo um when I was a
kid I could see the benefits of that I didn't you know I could see the benefits and if you share a toilet with six other people you know it's not the cleanest room in the house is it let's face it so but I think urination sometimes I mean as we're told well actually it comes out sterile and you can drink it if you like it's like well thanks dad but I'll just stick to water let's have a cup of tea thanks it's like oh you can drink yeah you can drink it but don't and you
can eat poison but don't because it will kill you possibly you can eat dirt yeah doesn't mean you should blimey you could eat snails doesn't mean you should France so why would anyone eat snails with the delicacy no it's well I mean how can it be a delicacy something this is everywhere slimy sluggy snails I've looked down at one of them before I bet you taste nice oh oh I'm hungry just by looking hmm he got my engine going I don't know yeah but I've spoken to men and women and they've all said the same
thing it's the same because I thought it was just a male thing I really thought men are just dirty but little boys dirty boys become dirty men a little bit brainless sometimes um I think there's a little bit more thinking possibly is needed but once we leave school a lot of people don't they just sort of stop thinking this I don't need to think no more I got a job uh I got a wife to tell me what to think I don't need to think no more I'll just do let's go to work and do
my job and I'll drink alcohol watch football I'm sure only a very tiny proportion of people are like that I'm sure lots and lots of men out there men and women are very highly you know educating themselves and reading books and learning I don't know what the proportion is of people that never read a book once they leave school that's it it's like nope the torch is now over I don't have to read another bloody book ever that's it can you imagine not being able to think for yourself because that's that's what education brings gives
you I think what um thinking gives you is the ability to kind of learn who you are so that you're not being a carbon copy of your friend and your dad or your mum or your brother or cousin you know you're not just being a little carbon copy of people around you saying the same things saying the same expressions liking the same things hating the same people bloody foreigners those refugees make Britain great again you know the the dum-dums so it's kind of imagine because anyone that has those kind of people that are extreme they
gotta kind of be a bit dumb I just it's not that they are dumb they just sound dumb and I've heard people that are very intelligent and they can't put an actual argument together because all they do especially when it's like to do with race or sexuality or politics that kind of stuff they just bring out the same arguments and it's the same sentences and they can't back it up they can't justify the reason for that is because it's emotional they've got this emotional thing and emotional emotions win over logic unfortunately it's funny to listen
to though a little bit disturbing but I don't know what the the theory is in psychology that but basically people search I've got something in my eye oh it's me eyeball people search for ways to back up their own prejudices search for information and I remember speaking to someone saying yeah but people don't live long doing that I'm not going to say what that is but doing that living that lifestyle and this person says oh but I know someone who's in his 60s and he's still doing it every day yeah but what about all the
people that you know in their 20s and 30s they're dead doing that thing you know it's that kind of mentality no I've got an example forgetting all the other examples of you know that actually go against what they believe even though it's evidence evidence evidentially hmm oh I went to doctors dum dum dum I want to read a book I don't want to read a book no I want to watch television and be told what to think I don't want to think for myself yeah yeah um I'm just messing about I don't believe anything I
say I just say it for the sake of it just saying it for the sake of it got no reason no damn no reason just seeing it for fun for my for for my own fun okay what is it six year old blimey I'm nearly gone over time I went to doctors anyway they've got this flat flat screen that you press the buttons you know like what you have in McDonald's and self-serving you know you press the buttons self-serving in supermarkets and they have them in the library now they have them in the job center
they have them at train stations bus stops whatever you press because they want to you know they want to spread germs around don't they that is the whole point of those screens in a doctor's surgery during what we're going through at the moment isn't that the dumbest thing you've ever heard a doctor's surgery where every patient has to press this screen with their fingers I didn't I did it with my knuckle but or my finger joint or whatever you want to call it but ultimately everyone's touching that with their hands now people going in there
I've got all kinds of illnesses diseases some contagious some not people are going in there that are vulnerable they're going to pick up other people's germs and they might be immune deficiency whatever and they're gonna potentially get ill because they're being forced and I say forced because you go to the reception yeah you need to you need to log in over there because we don't actually like to do anything here I know we're a doctor's surgery but we don't actually even like seeing or talking to the patients if at all possible we found another way
not to talk or see you is by getting everyone to log in over there on that big screen the germ sharing screen we like to call it and I just find that absolutely ridiculous anyway turns out I got high blood pressure and they gave me this machine to take home um that wasn't supposed to happen so I got this machine I'll put it whoops put it down so I've done my blood pressure twice since I've been in I have to do it twice a day so what I'm going to do I'm going to do it
now while I'm on there so the first time I did it I got 138 over 88 with 75 is the beats per second beats per minute which is the 75 ain't so bad but the blood pressure's over so I am basically you mother my head isn't gonna fit through there is it oh I just want things to work that's all why make things so complicated oh now it's the punch bags moving around right I'll put that there so I've got 138 over 88 and then this morning I had 128 over 84 and 60 which is
the rest in the heartbeat instead of 75 yesterday now admittedly I hadn't been up out of bed long so I guess I was feeling more relaxed now 138 was above it's not dangerous it's just above well who knows what dangerous is but it's not um it's it's it's too high but not like serious high 128 it's got to be a hell of a lot better haven't it than before so I'm going to do I'm going to do it now while we're here to see what it is with this we've got to do is press I
suppose you just relax my arm so I'm going to put there just relax it I'll put it on the thing yeah and I'll press start this is the sound of the thing so I'm just relaxing my arm I did tell them you know they should tell children that it's going to stop and it's not actually going to just crush their arm because that's what it feels like isn't it when you get it done I feel my heartbeat now all right now it's reducing right so this one is 126 over 90 so the bottom one is
higher highest it's been so I don't know what the DIA it's 126 over 90 but 70 resting um what's it heart rate so I'll write that down 126 plus 90 with 70 um I've got no idea this is weird isn't it so 138 over 88 then 128 over 84 now 126 over 90 now really I understand it's going to be different depending on what you've been doing but I haven't been doing anything for the last hour you know what I've been doing because you've been doing it with me depending on what you do when you
listen to me um 126 over 90 wonder what that means I'm not sure so 75 60 70 so there's some stuff I'm going to be doing to try and I guess um increase my fitness maybe lose I'm not to me it's not about losing weight it's about losing fat because I'm 100 kilos and I like being 100 kilos I don't I don't want to be little and skinny and weak um like I used to be I used I was so skinny it was embarrassing I wouldn't go out I would go out I don't know why
I said that um I wouldn't get you know I wouldn't go topless I remember the the photographer getting very angry it's a it's an erotic shoot Jason you have to go topless it's a glamour this is called glamour work for a reason I said no we need to see your boobies and I don't you're not seeing them I was embarrassed now I got great boobies so I'd like to lose the fat but keep the weight I think 100 kilos isn't heavy really what 225 pounds like it's too much for my weight I'm four foot six
so it's slightly heavy for what I you know for my height but I don't know I feel okay I feel you know it doesn't feel wrong but I'll do weights every day what I need to work on is my cardiovascular system so I've got an exercise bike that I may start to use use and I don't it's boring in it more boring than this recording is what cycling I'm sure a doctor said if you've got a bike I said no they've got an exercise bike well if you've got a bike bike that you can actually
use like a bicycle I said yeah got an exercise bike she said well you can't use that if you want to go shopping can you I said I got the internet I'd get deliveries she said that is not the point you make me so angry I said listen I don't what's the point having a bicycle you can't ride on the roads it's not safe to ride a bicycle on the roads you're not really allowed to ride on the pavements so or sidewalk whatever you call them where you are so you know what about the cycling
pavements yeah but in order for me to get to the cycling road to cycling bit you know because there are bits of pavement that are broken up for cyclists in town which is about seven eight miles away from where I live so yeah there is but I have to get there my transportation system's broke down at the moment I quite can't transport myself there I've watched a few episodes of Star Trek to try to fix it but I can't figure it out no no no no no no so yeah what's the point and I've seen
cyclists that do risk the roads and they hold up the traffic and it's I feel I'm embarrassed for them because they're just crawling along and there's miles of traffic behind them waiting to overtake them I've been on a I've actually been on a bus a few times but I was on a bus and there's if there's a cyclist my heart just sinks because every time the bus overtakes a cyclist guaranteed when the bus stops at a bus stop the cyclist overtakes the bus which then slows the bus down to a little crawl for another five
minutes it's you know it's just annoying so banned cyclists but also banned drivers of cars and lorries helicopters planes cars trains I think the only the only form of transport should be hovercraft see you weren't with me then then you did not mention how a hovercraft and you thought wow how groovy would that be yeah get rid of all the other stuff just have hovercrafts everyone has their own little mini hovercraft oh how much fun would that be and they like little bumper cars didn't they see no one's gonna get hurt oh oh that feeling
inside when I just think about it it feels so good I want it to last forever anyway I'm gonna go thanks for listening and watching and remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy be gentle with yourself and do something nice for yourself today something doesn't have to cost money just do something that you enjoy doing whatever it is just do it give yourself a nice little treat okay that's what I am prescribing to you today take care lots of love bye
Paragraph spacing and recurring name or title errors have been tidied. Because this began as a voice transcription, an occasional word or piece of punctuation may still be incorrect.