#766 Let me bore you to sleep - FEELING BETTER - Jason Newland (10th NOVEMBER 2021)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. My name is Jason Newland and this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. So hey, hope you're all okay and well.

Etc. I am... I'm still coughing a bit, but less than before. But it's a little bit psychological because it's a bit like trying not to fart at a funeral, you know.

It's kind of like I'm focusing on not doing it, but at the same time, you know, we get what we focus on. And so when I'm trying to focus on not coughing, I tend to cough more. But I got myself some Vicks Vapour Rub today in my food delivery, my grocery delivery.

And I splashed that, rubbed that into me, into my boobies. It felt quite nice. It was very cool, very cool.

Which is weird because Vicks Vapour Rub isn't cool on every part of your body that you put it on. Some parts it really stings. So it's kind of weird.

Weird how that works. But in my chest, it's nice and cool. And I'll put some on before I go bub-eyes.

And bub-eyes before I go to bed. And I'm the only 51 year old in the world that says bub-eyes. Mind you, there is a lot of like childish talk, isn't there? Especially like around Christmas.

Only 15 sleeps left till Christmas. Only 15 sleeps left. Now let me check.

Are you under the age of 10? First. You're not. Well, you can't say that then.

You can't use the how many sleeps there left. In fact, I think eight, I think eight is the cut off mark, I think. If you're in your 30s or 20s, saying how many sleeps there are until your holiday.

Like, no, no, stop it. You're talking like a little child. Stop now.

Or continue. Do what you want, I don't care. I don't really care.

Today's been, I still haven't got my hearing back. Like my proper hearing. I'm still probably I wouldn't sound necessarily 50%.

But I'd sound at least 25% down on the hearing. I've got about 25% loss. I've been saying 50% loss, but I don't think it's quite that drastic.

But it is. It's like I'm talking inside a bubble. In fact, it kind of sounds, it sounds, you know, when you put your hands over your ears, and you talk, it sounds a little bit like that.

But quite not quite as about 50%. I'm really into my percentages today. You also got one those.

I don't know how they fix sinus things that you stick up your nose and you inhale and it's like really strong. I'm trying to sort of thinking is it my sinuses that's affecting my ears because it's, it's the same. It's the same kind of, I don't know, potholing kind of area, isn't it? It's the same tunneling 500 people it took to save one man who was potholing potholing.

He was in some tunnels in England somewhere on his own. And he had an accident. So he needed emergency help.

And self inflicted, obviously, I mean, it doesn't matter what happened. It's self inflicted. If you go down a tunnel on your own, down a dangerous tunnel, whatever happens next is self inflicted.

Yes, that's the honest truth about it. Luckily, he's okay and he survived and it took 500 people plus to save him. Now a lot of those people were volunteers.

So it didn't take like 500 people that were getting paid to do the job. Can you imagine if 500 army personnel or 500 paramedics or whatever, you know, I mean, that had run into the millions, wouldn't it? The cost of that. I don't know, I wasn't interested enough to find out anything after he got he all I know is he got rescued and he got out, you know, they were with him on the news.

There was people with him at the point of when the news was on. So it wasn't it wasn't life threatening. Apparently, I don't know much about what's what happened.

And I've not really done a follow up. So I didn't care enough to really sort of see what happened. All I know, he got out safely.

And that was good for him. And that was it. But the amount of people it took self inflicted.

It's like, I don't know, I don't. I suppose I'm not really into caves, or small, dark spaces. I mean, the closest thing I go to a small dark spaces.

Want to go to the toilet, I guess this. I just want the entrance. I just don't really I don't see.

I don't understand the fascination. But hey, each to their own. Why do some people like snakes? Why do some people like skydiving? Why do some people like train spotting? Why do some people like making podcasts? Why do some people like boxing? Why do some people like eating peanut butter? Why did I can't stop? You know, just you get the idea.

It's hard not to mock though. It's hard not to just why? I'm sure there should be some regulations. If you're going to be in a position where you're able to call for help, okay, then you need to abide by some rules, surely.

Beforehand, been doing something like that. I'd have thought that there'd be like a code of conduct, a code of preparation. And the first thing is you don't do it on your own.

That's why if I was skydiving, I jumped out of a plane, right? I wouldn't do it on my own. Okay, I know I wouldn't be able to do it on my own for the first time, because I'd be strapped to someone's back. But I'd never jump out of a plane on my own, ever.

Because if my parachute didn't open, I'm grabbing onto their leg. And if their parachute doesn't open, I'm getting as far away from them as possible. I don't want them dragging me down.

But you know, if my parachute doesn't open, I'm not going on my own. I'm making sure I take someone with me. So I'll grab hold of the next person, I'll get to them, like in a Bond movie.

And either we'll get down safely, or we'll both go down together. That's my rule. That's why I don't go on little boats.

I'd only go on a big boat, cruises and big ships. If the boat's going to sink, I'm going to make sure I'll get on a boat, I will get onto one of the little boats anyway to get off. I've always done that.

Whenever I get onto a big, like a cruise ship, not cruise ship, but like a ship that's taking a ferry, usually it's a ferry, not a Brian. And it's always check where the lifeboats are always, always know the routes to get there. I don't mess about.

I'm very, yeah, very conscious of safety. I'm not sure how many people do that. I just get on.

Oh, let's get to the bar. Let's have a drink. I'm thinking that I see where's Okay, I look around see who I can how I can outrun.

Oh, Titanic. That was bad. They're very topical today, isn't it? The Titanic blindly.

How stupid it is to have a ship, but not have enough lifeboats, seats for everyone. There's no sense in that, is there? And this was at the time, the biggest ship in the world, or the biggest cruise, cruisy ship. I say, actually one of them because it had a twin, didn't it? That's one of the conspiracy theories is the twin, the Titanic's twin actually was the Titanic.

So the twin ship got told it wasn't allowed to go out. Apparently, I watched this documentary a few years ago. And the there was some proper problems with it.

And apparently, the owner or the person who had invested the money decided that he wasn't going to listen to to what he was told. And he decided to just stick the Titanic sign on it because it was a twin ship. It was pretty much the same ship.

But this one didn't work properly. And he decided to just, I don't know how true that is. But you know, these conspiracy theories is, it's like anything you can find information.

If you search, looking for stuff to back up your theory, that's what you're gonna find. It might not be the most factual. But if that's where you're looking, it's like, you know, it's the same thing.

If you're in a car and you decide to just focus on the yellow cars you see on the motorway. That's what you're going to focus on. And that's what you're going to see more of.

And like, wow, I can't believe how many yellow cars there are today. It's no more than normal. You're just, you're focusing on it.

That's all. Unless of course it is Banana Car Day Festival. You never know.

It's Banana Car Day Festival today. I'm going to go away one day. My voice will break and I'll sound like a real man.

So I haven't been out in two days, three days. Not been out this week yet. Because I wasn't, this wasn't very well.

I've got an upset stomach and a cough and stuff. Monday, Tuesday and today's Wednesday. Also not been getting the sleep I've needed because I've been lying down and I'm coughing when I'm lying down.

But this fixed vapour up seemed to have helped because I had a nice lie down this afternoon for a couple of hours. It was glorious and glorious. It was crucial.

That's what it was. And what other things? Oh yeah, Wednesday, I had my delivery. I had my grocery delivery today.

A few things weren't available but generally it worked out okay. So I've got plenty of milk and bread and some cheese and some tomatoes and some lettuce and some milkshakes from Weight Watchers. No Slim Fast rather.

I do like their milkshakes, they're lovely. They're supposed to replace a meal but I just have them with the meal. I have them with my chips and my burger because it tastes so nice.

And what else? I've got plenty of water as well which is good because the garage, it's expensive buying water in the garage. In the supermarket it's just a lot cheaper. So I've got a nice supply which should keep me going for a couple of weeks.

What else? I've got a box of cokes. So there's 24 cans. So you know, I still drink me cokes.

I still have maybe two or three cans a day maybe. But I'm drinking more of other things like juices or the milkshakes or tea. I'm trying to sort of, and water of course.

I love my water. It's actually my favourite drink of all, is water. Strange isn't it? It's just there's nothing, I don't find that anything quenches my thirst like water.

I'm not sure that tea, like you know cups of tea, I don't know if they're really very quench thirsty. Quench thirsty, if that's the right word. Partly because there's not enough of it.

Like when I drink water, you know I can drink well easily like over a cup full of water like in one go. If you do that with your tea, it's all gone. With tea, I sip it.

Like that. I like a cup of tea with a sandwich. Especially with a dry sandwich because it just helps to moisten it.

But I like, yeah, so I have a cup of coffee in the morning with my breakfast and then I have a cup of tea about mid-morning time and then maybe another cup of tea. Yeah, maybe sometimes two cups of tea a day, sometimes three. But you know it's definitely increased over the last couple of months.

I never used to drink tea. You know it was a, it's very rare, it's a very very rare thing. Very rare.

I didn't drink it very often. I used to drink coffee again once a day. Funny enough, coffee sends me a bit, it does, sends me a bit buzzy but not in a good way.

A bit like, I don't know, maybe agitated, a bit restless, a bit you know, sometimes I get a little heart palpitations and stuff and I don't get that with coke but I get it with coffee. If I've had maybe 10 cups in a row, yeah, perhaps I shouldn't have 10 cups in a row. No, but you know, if I have a cup of coffee for my breakfast and then sometimes my friend will knock on the door and says, I need coffee.

So I say okay, well I'll have a cup of coffee. I'll have a coffee with him and then might even say, oh can I have another cup. So I'll do two cups and I'll have one myself.

So by that time I've had three cups of coffee. Too much. I don't do it anymore.

I just don't answer the door. I do, I do, I do. But I don't, I don't drink coffee anymore.

Other than just once in the morning with me breakfast and that's it. So if I've got me cornflakes or I'm going off cornflakes a little bit, rice krispies, going off rice krispies a bit, even shredded wheat, going off them a bit as well. I kind of, I think the reason and I forgot I forgot to order the proper breakfast for this time of year, which is ready break for me.

Or porridge, but ready break. I love myself a little bit of ready break. I'm very pleased with ready break.

I guess because it's not been cold yet. We've not had any, any really cold weather. In fact, it was probably colder in the summer than what it's been this week, which is weird.

Honestly, we had colder days in June than we've had this month, where I'm living anyway. Obviously, if you're in the Antarctic or maybe Canada, I imagine it's cold in Canada now, isn't it? And didn't I see this snowing in Spain? It's snowing in some parts of Europe, which means we don't we often get the weather that Europe has had. I think, I don't know.

But even though it's been very mild, even though it's been extremely mild, like temperatures, the last couple of months, and this is this is winter now, isn't it? November, the 10th of November, it's winter, isn't it? Or is it still classed as autumn? I don't know. And but I mean, the leaves have fallen off the trees, I think, I think. And so yeah, I don't know.

I always class November as winter. December's winter. January's winter.

And then a class February is spring, like winter leading into spring. Because the weather changes so much in February, you know, it can be winter, and then it can be like a summer's day. And then, you know, it's very strange where I live in my brain.

I'm just talking about my garden, nowhere else. It's just the changes in the weather. It's the changes in the weather.

So, yeah, I'm not sure. The last time I remember really mild winter, or, you know, leading up to Christmas time was in 1995. I was living in London there in Derry, Derry, London.

And I moved to Bognor Regis to work at Butlins. And I remember I recall walking around in a little jacket that I was given when I lived in Ireland. And it wasn't a it wasn't a winter jacket.

It was kind of like a little football, you know, American sports jacket like that. But it's little, you know, not little. I mean, I was only I wasn't too big at the time.

But just it was wasn't. It was a summer jacket. It was a summer jacket really wasn't a winter jacket.

And I was walking around in that all the way up to Christmas. And I remember like it was I went to Bognor probably. It must have been November time for the Christmas season.

And I remember walking around with my top open. Not my belly button out. I didn't have my boobies out or anything.

It was just I had me. I probably had a jumper on underneath. But it wasn't cold.

It really wasn't. A bit chilly like late at night. But other than that, I don't recall another like November, December, like that since until now.

Now, admittedly, I can't talk about December because it ain't December yet. It's still November. But there's that similarity of mildness of, you know, being like 11 degrees or something.

No, no, 11 degrees isn't summer temperature, is it? But 20 degrees is hot, isn't it? So it's only 10 degrees. But then take another 10 degrees off and it's minus. Isn't it amazing? I don't understand.

So I'm just. Yeah, I'm curious about it. Global warming is global warming.

I don't know. I just it's. See, I'm not really someone to I don't moan.

I do moan. Okay. I don't moan about the weather.

I do moan about the weather. Okay. Yeah.

I it's that's probably the most English I am is talking about the weather. It's a fascination with the weather that's inbred into English people were born with that fascination of the weather in our veins is part of our genetic DNA or whatever. It just is.

I don't know. It's just. I think anyone born in this country has just got a fascination with the weather.

We just any bus stop, you go to any bus stop and providing the persons, you know, not out to isn't, you know, I mean, I don't know how many if you'd really want to get into a conversation with someone at a bus stop, but the amount of times I've done that and it's always been about the weather. I mean, you can't ask them. You can't do an open as there.

So how you hemorrhoids, you know, because they can't really open a conversation with that, can you? But, you know, it's like the weather or you can't. I suppose you can't really do honesty. You know, if someone's like sort of almost jogging up and down and say, oh, do you need a poo? No, it's like that's cold, isn't it? Yeah, it's cold.

If they mention they need a poo, then you can say, well, yeah, me too. I'll tell you what, I'll keep lookout. You do it beyond the bus shelter and then you can come and keep lookout for me.

And but often ends up messy. And relax. See, yeah, I'm trying to think.

I mean, I realized I'm behind on my website. I haven't updated it for some while. So today I've been doing that, as well as some of the other stuff I do.

So I did. Yeah, I've got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, more recordings to add. Well, eight with this one.

And then I'll be all up to date as far as the front page as far as the latest recordings. But I haven't done any like new recordings other than the Let Me Boy to Sleep for a few weeks, I think a couple of weeks, three weeks because of being ill. And because to be fair, this is the first time that I've been able to talk for any length of time without coughing.

So I'm 30 minutes in to this recording, and I haven't coughed apart from right at the beginning. And I paused it for that. And now I just had to pause then, as soon as I mentioned it.

Off I go. It's, it's, I'm sorry, I think there's a psychological aspects to this. I remember years ago, I had this cough.

And I had a chest infection. So there was a kind of a residual cough that continued. It was just occasionally, you know, it wasn't like all the time.

And then I got a job in a call center later in the year. So I had the chest infection about April time, started this job in December. So I was well and truly clear with everything, you know, I had the chest infection for about four weeks, three weeks, something like that.

But I was coughing, kept coughing. Just when I was talking on the phone, because that was my job, you know, not ideal to keep coughing, and went to the doctors. And he said that, well, first of all, excuse me, first of all, they suspected of me of asthma, they said I might have asthma.

So they put me on inhaler, both, what was it, blue and what's the other color? Is it brown? I'm talking to you. There's no one else in the room talking to you. Who's listening? Listen, it's you I'm talking to.

Is it blue? Blue? Definitely one's blue. And the other one, I think is brown, I think. Anyway, two inhalers.

One's a steroid and one's another thing. I don't know. And so I was taking that because this was affecting my job.

This is affecting my work. And I didn't want to be coughing all the time. And I just didn't be kind of figure out what it was.

So you know, I went to doctors and I went to a nurse and they put me to specialist nurse for asthma and tested me and I was kind of, they weren't sure it wasn't like a definite yes or definite no. It was maybe. So I had the asthma thing.

I'm not sure if it helped. I think it did a little bit. It seemed to do.

I quite enjoyed it actually. It was just weird. It's like, oh, something new.

I got this thing I can suck on every now and then. And just, I don't know, just, it was a novelty, I suppose. A bit like herpes, just, you know, something, you know, it's nothing like herpes.

What am I talking about? So I, then, and this was probably probably about April time. So I got started the job in December, but April went to the doctors, started using the asthma. And then I went back to the doctors, probably about May, June time.

And because I was having issues with depression and they put me on antibiotics and antidepressants. I should be able to figure that word out, shouldn't I? Went for depression and antidepressants. And you know what happened? The cough cleared up, like completely.

So doctor said, yeah, it must have been stress. Must have been just the cough was caused by stress. As so many symptoms I've had in the past.

Very strange. See, I didn't know that right in the old days. Well, before the age of 25, I didn't know that stress can cause physical illness.

Didn't know that. I know, like, perhaps everybody knows that now. How could you not have known that? It's so obvious.

No, but what I didn't realize that it could cause stuff that didn't seem relevant to what's going on. I'd heard about stress headaches. Now that made sense to me.

You know, if you're under a lot of stress and the headaches almost forcing you to move away from overworking or, you know, I don't know. It's almost, it's forcing you to take a step back, which might in some ways make sense. It's not, it's not nice, but it, you know, the mind works in, it doesn't always, it doesn't always do things in a way that we want it to be done or that we would like it to be done, I guess, to get the same results.

But I was very surprised that I'd been ill for 10 months with stomach problems and stuff and to get told it was stress. Now I found that ridiculous at the time. I laughed.

I said, what do you mean stressed? Now I know I'd been depressed and I knew, but I was depressed because of how ill I'd been for such a long time. It really got to me. But before that, I don't remember feeling stressed.

Oh, okay. I was stressed as there was a bit, a bit of tension, a bit of stress, but nothing that I would class as major. If I'm honest, I was living in Ireland and literally, I mean, the first time I, I remember I went, I went on a Saturday morning.

I had a bad beer, never had a bad beer before. This beer was bad and I drunk it and I was ill, like practically instantly. And I attributed that because ever since that, I started to feel ill.

It probably had nothing to do with that. But anyway, I came back to London in the, I don't know what month it was, it's November, probably October, November 94. And from then on, October, maybe all the way through till about August, September, maybe July, August.

So the next year was when I finally got, they, they basically just prescribed me antidepressants, Silopram or Silopra, I don't know, one of those. And never had any medication in my life other than antibiotics or penicillin or, you know, something that was like short term, never had been put on any kind of medication that lasted more than maybe a week. That was the first time in my life.

And I couldn't believe that all the symptoms of stress or, okay, not so, all the physical symptoms of my illness left, just left, just went. And I put on half a stone within probably about a month. Now, some would say that's not a lot.

It was, I didn't weigh much. In them days, I was very, very skinny. Now, and I think I'd, if anything, probably lost weight because every time I ate, I went, I was in the toilet.

You know, literally, I wasn't eating much because I didn't want to eat because I was in so much pain. So straight away, put on half a stone, felt stronger, felt fitter than I'd ever felt, probably. I was probably happier, I think, in a way.

Antidepressants, I suppose. But I didn't like, what I didn't like was the grogginess that I was feeling. I mean, I'm not saying everyone has grogginess.

But for me, I, because let's face it, I was in the prime of my life, in a sense, physically. Well, I wasn't because I had not been well. But, you know, 25 years old, just turned 25.

Well, no, I was still 24, probably when I was, no, wait, I want to do it. No, I was still 24. Still 24 when I got given the tablets, but I was 25, probably a few weeks later.

So I probably got given the tablets in kind of September time. And then I started, started doing some, I had this job that I had. I had some work, I think.

And it was weird. I was drinking milk every day. I was eating.

Everything was just, I had strength, you know, got my strength back. I was doing all right, actually. Got a new girlfriend, you know, so I must have been given off a more positive vibe.

Must have looked better, more healthier or something. I don't know. But anyway, I got a girlfriend.

And that was nice. And huge, huge change in my life. Just feeling better.

But um, I'll just have a drink. I feel quite nostalgic about that period. And then I get, get this, yeah.

Then I move, then I put on a half a stone. Then I go to Butlins. And I put on about a stone, another stone, because I'm eating three meals a day.

Three cooked meals a day. Because there's a canteen there. Basically, providing you get there on time, get there at the right time.

Three cooked meals, and you can have as many servings as you want. And I was drinking a pint of milk with every dinner with every, everything I ate. Perhaps not for breakfast, to be fair, because I had breakfast cereal with milk on.

But for lunch, and for evening meal, I was having a pint of milk of each. And I didn't have the ability to be fat, or to even put any fat on. For some, I would literally, I think my fat ratio would have been my fat percentage or ever would have been practically minuscule.

Because unlike now, obviously, I'm probably, it'd be easier to find the fat than the not fat. I'm probably about 98% fat, I reckon. But back then, I'd say I was very tiny percentage.

I was very, I would have been classed as very healthy, I guess. But even with the extra weight, the extra weight, stone and a half, because I put on about another stone in probably about three weeks. I was stuffing myself, honestly, eating so much.

I was just, I was drinking every night as well. It's great. Not every night, but the nights when I wasn't working.

And unless we did go to, yeah, I think we drunk after work as well. I was working in a bar. So yeah, probably to be fair, but not during, didn't drink whilst I was working.

So busy, never been busy. That's the busiest. Okay, it's not the busiest job, because that would probably be wrong to say that.

Because there was times when I was in the chip shop when it was just ram packed, continuous. I remember my boss opened up on a Sunday, or maybe it was a bank holiday. And it was probably the busiest I think we've ever had it.

It was so busy. Another time, he had these orders, where he got us to come in, out of hours, and put together all these orders, which is for, I don't know what it was for, some big function or something. So there'd be like, 250 portions of chips and fish.

And like, it was just absolutely mayhem. It was so busy, putting it all together. And he was getting stressed and shouting.

It came together in the end, but blimey. It's just, that was a heck of a job. I just think it really basically, any situation where I'm at the end of the line, you know, if I'm on the till in a supermarket, then it's busy, because I'm just so slow.

I used to work in a supermarket when I was about 17, and constantly making mistakes. It's what I do find funny, especially when I worked in a pub. No one ever complains when you, when you don't charge them enough.

You know, when you charge them less than what you're supposed to. No one ever complains. No one complains when you give them too much change.

You know, do they? No one ever complains with that. They don't mind those mistakes. No one minds them giving you, you give them £7.40 in change when it should be £2.40. But you shortchange them by a penny.

Oh, I mean, people in the pubs were so dim, they didn't understand, couldn't get their heads around how stupid they were being by complaining. Because they'd come in, they'd spend all night long getting drinks at a lot cheaper price than they should have done. Yeah.

Because they knew that I was incompetent. I was. I couldn't, just the adding up, it was complicated for me.

It wasn't so much the adding up, it was the adding up. But it was the, the stress of having to do it really quickly. It's like, I had, let's say, five drinks to add up.

It was a stress of having to do it and get it completed on that day. I couldn't take it home with a piece of paper and a calculator and work it out. Now things are a lot easier.

Tills, they just like, you press, sometimes a picture of what you want, you press it and, you know, it does all the work for you. Tells you how much change to give. But back then the tills weren't like that.

They were abacuses. So I used to get flustered and so people would come in, target me, knowing that I'd give them, probably they'd saved themselves quite a bit of money by ordering with me. Now I wasn't purposely doing it.

I was just incompetent. You know, I wouldn't, because that would be stealing, wouldn't it? It's, you know, if you give stuff away free, you're stealing off your boss. And I'm not a thief.

Although sometimes I would give things away free. So I guess I am a thief then. You know, we're in a chip shop.

If there was a friend came in or a girl I liked or something, I'd give her a bigger portion, you know, just to sort of say, hey, hopefully I like, you know, letting them, I like them. I remember this one girl, I literally, she was sitting down and she was literally covered in chips. I liked that much.

I was just chucking them all over her, just to let her know it didn't work. But yeah, I was giving people drinks and stuff. But generally, if I give someone a drink, yeah, I'd pay for it.

We had a thing in the comedy club that if you, if you had a drink, you put a pound in the pot. So just to cover the cost of the drink. But then I wouldn't drink when I was working anyway.

And because I was, I'd be there till two o'clock in the morning. Sometimes my friend, the boss would bring me a drink to the DJ booth, but I'd drink Cokes and that, but I wouldn't drink alcohol. Not until I'd finished work.

So it'd be like 2.30 at the least before I'd ever drink any alcohol. But I don't know what my point was on that. There must have been a point.

Oh, wait a minute. There's no point is there to any of this. It's just talking nonsense for no reason.

Absolute silliness. What is? Yes. So I, this is, this is 2014.

I think it's 2014. And I think, yeah. Anyway, I had, I was, went back onto the antidepressants and my cough stopped.

It's very strange. I don't know what it is. I mean, even when I think that I'm relaxed, I'm calm, I'm loose and it still seems to be sort of sometimes like things are just happening in my body.

And, and it's very strange. I've had so many, so many weird things happen, stress wise. That I just find it very strange, very strange indeed.

So anyway, I've got a doctor's appointment tomorrow and originally I had him booked for the 18th as a follow-up to my appointment for my back. So I had the appointment, I think it was the 18th of October. And that's when I got ill.

And then, or maybe it was earlier, but I was really, really, I mentioned it probably a few times. And this cough is, although the cough's really, I shouldn't talk about the cough, the thing that we won't mention has been like almost a residual from that, like a leftover. But the doctors phoned me up two days ago and said, we're bringing your, they're so arrogant, almost like really, I don't know.

Yeah. We're bringing your appointment forward to Thursday. Not, is it okay if we bring your appointment over to Thursday? But it's like, we're bringing your appointment over to Thursday, then is that okay? Like really kind of like, this is what we're doing, is it all right? Rather than, is it okay if we do this? There's a real, I don't know, they've got a proper attitude in that place.

But it's, I think it's, to me, it feels like being with an abusive partner in a way. It's, I kind of feel that I need, I need them, and I do need them. But I've got that mentality of having to put up with the crap from them, placate them, be nice to them.

Hopefully they won't be horrible to me, so that, just so I can have medical care. That's kind of how I feel about that place. So, you know, I feel, I tiptoe around them.

I mean, my medication wasn't, didn't come through, wasn't available to order on the app that I use, that they have. And when they phoned me, I said, oh, by the way, can I just ask you about my prescription? Because I sent a message, you know, did you send it via the website? Yes, via the website. I'm really like, it's by the website.

And I heard her shout, have you had a, like, almost, not shouting, but like quite aggressive, like to someone else. You had a message from Mr Newland. Yeah, yeah, it's been sorted out.

And that was it. No information. No, nothing.

Just like, okay, it's been sent to the prescriptions. Okay. And that was it.

Thank you very much. Bye, I said to them. They didn't tell me any more than that.

It's been sent to the prescriptions. Now, I've not heard nothing since. No emails, no, nothing on the app, nothing to say that the prescription's been sent, it's been done, it's been sent to the pharmacy.

Luckily, my friend was going up that way, I said, can you just pop in and ask? Because I wasn't well enough to go out, my stomach's been a bit weird. And plus, I didn't want to get onto the bus while I'm coughing. Because people look at you like you've got your pants down, basically.

Honestly, it's like, it's the worst thing you could do. How dare you cough? Plus, on the buses, no one has the windows open anymore. They used to be so, we're supposed to have the window, they go on about ventilating areas where there's people sitting down.

A bus needs the windows open. Admittedly, okay, if it's raining, close the windows. But other than that, the heating's on.

Just let, you know, you shouldn't expect to sit on a bus or a t-shirt anyway in the winter. Put your coat on. Need some ventilation, but there isn't, if the windows are not open.

I'd say I'd go off my little chair now. Behind chair. What was I going to say? Oh, yeah, anyway, my friend went into the pharmacy today.

I said, can you just do us a favour if you're going, he was going up that area. And I said, can you just ask to see if my prescription's in, please? And he said, perhaps you should phone them. Because, you know, just let them know that I'm collecting them.

I thought, okay. He had a point, you know. Usually, they know me and him are friends because we live in the same building, and I've collected his prescription.

But they have different staff working there, so it's a good idea, really, just to prepare it. Just, you know, rather than him having to phone me and stuff. Anyway, I phoned up, so he goes off to get, he's heading off there.

I phoned them. The answer machine for the pharmacy is awful. It's like, oh, it really like, just only call us if it's an emergency.

Don't bother us with anything. And that was the tone of the answer machine message. Now, and it went on for ages.

It's like, please go away. Please go away. Do you want to go away? Are you still here? Are you still here listening to this? Well, if you're still here, please go away.

You're still you're still here after that? Okay. Well, just wait and you'll be answered. But you know, please don't, please, please don't wait on the line to be answered.

If it's not important. It's like I'm exaggerating, but it's like that. And then I get through.

They're nice as pie when you get through to them. They're nice. They're lovely on the phone, very helpful.

And I said, yeah, can I just check my prescriptions in? The doctors didn't tell me if it was when it's coming or anything. They said, yeah, it's coming. I said, can I just ask my friend? My friend Jesus is going to come and collect.

They said, you mean, Jesus? I said, yeah, one of them said, okay, it's fine. Okay, thanks. Bye.

Love you. And that was it. But the answer machine made them sound like fascists.

They sounded awful. And I tell you, is the sooner I can go private, the better. Oh, the thing is, all the doctors are nice in a doctor's surgery.

All the doctors, pretty much, they're all okay. It's just on the phone. The doctor don't want to, it's almost like don't want to deal with anyone.

I don't understand it. I don't. And apparently, there's been, let me just check this.

And that's not really relevant to anything, but doctors appointments. I saw something about this down. Okay.

Okay, this is October, the number of doctors is falling and appointments are going up. Okay. So that's and this, this is now contradicting that same thing.

Okay, appointments, that's generic, I can cover anything. This is from the Telegraph. 30th of September, this year, so it's just over a month ago.

Face to face GP appointments down by almost 1 million. Okay. Okay, it's another thing.

It's a telegraph. They're going to give me practically nothing to read because they want me to pay for it. You can do with that.

Campaigners for elderly warned that remote appointments are the new normal and accused government of failing to get a grip. Doctors don't seem to want to see people anymore. And I'm maybe I'm wrong.

I'm I'm generalizing just from my experience. It says, oh, yeah, this is the pulse. pulse.co.uk pulse today.co.uk GP appointments in April down by 27% compared with last year down.

Oh, that's 2020. What is going to be down? It was during the height of the Coronavirus. I mean, GP surgeries, my GP surgery, right? They were talking through a window, a side window from the office.

I joke you not. There was zero privacy outside in the cold, because at the time, it was like January, February. And there was a queue of people and people could hear everything he was saying.

No privacy. There was no point phone in and they weren't answering the phone. Or maybe they just couldn't, you know, they didn't have enough staff or they were too busy talking out of the window.

And it was horrible. It was almost, I want to get a situation like that. And I'm there because of maybe a bad back.

For some reason, I just want to talk about erectile dysfunction. When there's people behind me listening, this part of me wants to start talking and thinking about the weirdest kind of medical things I could talk about. And like, I've grown a new tail since the last one was cut off and no one's grown.

I don't know, something's weird like that. But I don't know what it is. I think that the GP surgeries have gotten used to how things were during lockdown.

And I think they preferred it. I think they preferred not having contact with the customers, with the patients. And my GP surgeries like McDonald's has actually got a big screen that you have to touch to book in your appointment.

So, which is probably the most retarded thing you can imagine, isn't it? All these people coming in, you don't know what diseases they've got. I mean, serious illnesses that maybe you wouldn't catch. It might not be airborne, but it might be on the end of their finger.

They touch that screen, then you come in, your old granny or your granddad comes in, touches the screen, or your little child, wouldn't touch the screen. But you know, just how, in my brain, I'm no, I'm no, I'm not a fireman. I'm not a scientist.

I'm not. I'm just average intelligence. But come on, that.

I mean, clearly, McDonald's, it's spreading diseases, because any of those screens, anywhere you go with those screens where you're touching stuff, train stations, bus, whatever, they're spreading disease and illness. There's no one there cleaning them every time someone touches it. You know, there was a little bit of that with McDonald's when they opened, you know, continuously cleaning the screen.

But you know, that's going to go down. Because they've got young people working there, who are just going to just get busy and other things and not going to be probably caring. And I've seen is ridiculous.

It's been young people brilliant. Just not, you know, there's some of the people in McDonald's working, they're very, very young, they might not be that bothered about the job. And I relate to that.

And if you don't care about the job, you don't care about cleaning stuff, or wiping a screen that you're supposed to wipe regularly. Not because you don't care about people or care about health and stuff is just because overall, you just don't care. It's of zero interest to you.

And you want to go and do something else. So I still remember the first time I went to McDonald's when I opened again after the all the lockdowns. And some kid, he was a kid, he's probably young, he was a late teenager, probably.

With a mask on, pulled the mask off and sneezed. Like just sprayed a big sneeze everywhere. And is that just sums up, sums up certain things in my brain.

The latest NHS digital data show a 30% fall in the overall number of GP appointments in England in March. This was last year. That's not even relevant.

Obviously, it's going to have gone down. Because they were telling everyone, don't come. We don't want you here.

We don't want you making appointments. We don't want you in the hospital. Don't come.

You know, they were scaring everyone so much to not come anywhere near any medical establishments. But they've been doing that for years. The emergency service, don't come to the hospital unless it's an emergency.

Don't come. And then people, some people are of the mind of, well, I'll be all right. I'll be all right then.

Oh, yeah, they probably might not be an emergency. So leave it. When what they should be doing is calling 999, which is the correct number.

I know some people have different numbers, but that's the proper emergency number. Where did the numbers come from? You got 911 in America. I don't know what the numbers in Canada.

I don't know what the, but the emergency number in the UK is 999. Well, in England, I guess it is the same in Scotland and Wales. 999.

Where did they, I mean, who was the first to do it? It was probably England. I'm going to, I'm going to research this before anyone gets upset with me. Okay, which country had first really winds me up.

It's basically just deleted what I wrote, which country had first emergency number? Here we go. Which country had the first emergency number? The United Kingdom. I thought so.

It's just, we're so far ahead, aren't we? We, well, let's face it. I mean, we owned most, we owned a lot of the world, didn't we? Back a long time ago, you know, so we, we owned America, we owned Australia, we owned Ireland. By owned, I mean, we governed, I don't know what the right word is.

I say we, I wasn't alive. Don't blame me. But it was, or is it better to say it was part of the United Kingdom? So America was part of the United Kingdom.

Australia was part of the United Kingdom. I remember when Australia was handed back. It's about 1987.

Seriously, it's not, it's not that long ago, is it? And New Zealand, I think as well. What other parts of Africa, India, of course. Blimey.

Falkland Islands still is, I think. Yeah. So the reason I'm saying that is because we would have had probably quite a few of the things that we did here would have been done in other countries, I guess, maybe.

That's all I'm saying that for. I don't know. But apparently 999 was originated in London in 1936, was the first, the world's first automatic telephone service to call the emergency services.

Wow. Blimey. Apparently it said the Metropolitan Police Information Room.

An emergency number was suggested after a disaster in 1935, where five women died during a fire in Wimpole Street in London. What the hell did people do before 1936? 1936, bearing in mind, I mean, my grandparents were alive then. My grandparents were alive.

My grand, my granddad was 27 years old in 1936. 26 years old in 1936. So what the heck do people do in an emergency? Which country has 112 emergency? Oh, Ireland.

Ireland. Oh, yeah. Ireland has 112 and 999.

So that would be, it doesn't say it here, but that would be Northern Ireland would be 999. And the rest of Ireland would be 112 then. I didn't realize that.

Unless 999, I don't know, maybe they're interchangeable. I don't know. Israel is 101 for ambulance police 100.

Italy. Wow, look at this. This is a whole new conversation, isn't it? I'm really excited about this.

I wish I'd done this earlier. Go away advert. Okay.

Australia 112. Argentina, Argentina, Argentina 101 ambulance. Bahamas 911.

But doesn't Bahamas, I hear Bahamas class itself as a part of America now, isn't it? 911 911. Okay. Bahrain, Bahrain 999 like us.

I don't see how many others. British Virgin Islands 999 like us. Gibraltar 999.

But that's part of United Kingdom, isn't it? Part of Britain, Gibraltar I think. Hong Kong 999. I remember, I might be getting muddied up now because I remember when Hong Kong was handed over, because we had it for 100 years, didn't we? For some reason.

And then we handed it over. Maybe that was handed over in 87. When was when was Australia handed over then? Maybe maybe I got that wrong.

So Hong Kong's 999. So all these countries that were used to be part of England or part of the United Kingdom. Macau 999.

Malaysia 999. Wow. Qatar, Qatar 999.

Scotland 999. But also 112. Don't understand that.

Unless it's just interchangeable. You can do 112 or you could do 999. Let me know if you if you have that information.

I'd be interested. Uruguay 999. And 911.

Wow. United Kingdom, of course. What the hell? 112? What? Why has it got 112 999? There's no 112 here that I know of.

United Arab Emirates 999 and 998. Let's have a look at how many 911s there are. Bahamas, Bermuda, Brazil.

Brazil is part of the Americas, isn't it? I suppose. I think. South America 911.

Canada 911. I didn't know that. Wow.

This is the same landmass as the United States, isn't it? 911. How many 911s? Costa Rica. Dominican Republic 911.

Emergency. Fiji 911. Philippines.

That's interesting. 911. Puerto Rico 911.

U.S. Virgin Islands 911. Isn't interested. United States hasn't come up.

Wow. The obvious one out of all of it. Country.

America. United States has not come up at all. How weird.

Isn't that strange? Anyway, there's quite a few different ones. The longest one is South Africa. South Africa has got about 17 numbers.

No, it hasn't. Where is it? Yeah. 10177 or 10111 if you want to place.

Blimey. All the rest are just simple numbers. That's like a whole telephone number.

Anyway, I've really gone randomly off onto some just talking about stuff. I should go now. I was really interested in that.

It's no weird what gets us going. I was really interested. I like learning new things.

Sometimes. Sometimes. Anyway, I'm going to go.

So you take care of yourselves. I'll be really pleased that I've been able to talk pretty much all the way through apart from twice, once at the beginning and once when I mentioned it without coughing. Which means I'm pointed in the right direction.

And also means I'll be able to start making some new recordings because I haven't felt confident enough to make them. It's very hard to. It's very hard to make a recording when I'm not crying, I'll be sure.

It's very hard to make. It's very hard to. Yeah, it's just this hard work.

And I'll put myself through it once a day to make this to make a let me bore you to sleep. But I can't, you know, I'm not being able to do it more than once a day. It's just too much.

But today, it's been a pleasure. It's been easy. It's been very lovely.

I've enjoyed it. I've actually had fun. Just talking, just being able to talk.

Oh, it's been good. So I want to go remember to be kind to yourself. Okay, you deserve to be happy.

Be gentle with yourself. Do something nice. And I shall speak to you tomorrow.

So thank you for listening. Lots of love. Bye bye, baby.

Bye bye.