#477 Let me bore you to sleep

Hello, welcome to Jason Newland. Welcome. My name is Jason Newland and this is Let Me Bore You to Sleep.

Hello, and I've got Andre the Ferret in my arms, being a little bit restless, aren't you? You're a little bit restless. You want to go for a walk, don't you? That's all he wants in the entire world right now. He wants to go for a walk like a little child on Christmas Eve.

All he wants is that bike. He can get that bike in the morning, the bike he's dreamt of. His whole life will be complete.

It's the whole world is evolved around that bike. Everything will be perfect if that bike is there when he wakes up. That's what Andre's like right now.

If he could go for a walk, everything will be perfect. Your whole life will be complete by now, Andre, even though you've already been out. Well, yesterday, anyway.

You want to get off? Okay, go ahead. Well, now he wants to bite my shoes. That's nice.

I'm just drinking a cup of tea. You probably hear Andre scratching at the front door, but other than putting him in a cage, what else can I do? Well, I might put him in the cage, but it's not late. I'm recording this a little bit early.

It's for tomorrow, but it's 10 o'clock. I'll release it, you know, midnight or something. Mind you, by the time I've edited it, it will be midnight anyway.

So yesterday, or today, yesterday, yesterday, I couldn't, I don't know if I told you this, I went to the garage three times to get some cokes, some cans of coke. I had two cans in the fridge. So I had one, I suppose, early afternoon, and I went to the garage, probably about five, maybe earlier, maybe, yeah, maybe earlier.

The garage was closed. I got there, the lights were on, the person who works there's car was there in the garage, you know, he's parked, but the doors were locked. They had the, you know, those cones, traffic cone things to stop the cars from coming in and out.

They can't physically stop the car, but you know, they sort of, it's more of a metaphor, isn't it? Anyway, the person that works there was nowhere to be seen, and I couldn't figure it out. Because sometimes they used to lock it when they had deliveries, if there was just one person, or if they had, what's it, sandwich deliveries, because they, you know, they needed to put them out. So they closed the garage for an hour, losing thousands of pounds for, just so they could put sandwiches and, you know, put a delivery out, a collector's delivery, put it out, and a thousand, at peak time as well, they'd do it about five o'clock in the evening, in the afternoon, for something that made, I can't imagine, they can make more than about £100 profit if they sold all of the sandwiches.

I'd be surprised if they made much profit there, but they would lose, you know, the amount of cars that would come in and got petrol, thousands and thousands of pounds worth. So I figured out they were losing, probably, if they did that in all of the garages that they owned, these people that own these garages, they'd lose probably well over a million a year in profit, in money. And I thought, why am I thinking about this? Oh yeah, I can listen and you can safely close your eyes, because you might find this boring, podcast boring, which might lead you to feel boring, which may lead you to feel doozy, which may lead you to feel tired, which may cause your mind to drift, and you may just drift off into a nice little sleep.

What do I say for this dinner? So I hung around for a little while and then I left, and I went out again a couple of hours later to the garage to get some cokes, got there. This time I went with one of the neighbours who was also wanting to go to the garage. Luckily, for me, they weren't open because she wanted me to buy her something.

So that was handy. She said, well, can you get me a can of... It's only £1.90. £1.90? I don't have £1.90. So I was just going to get what I wanted and then just say I didn't have enough money, because I didn't... Anyway, got there and closed. Went back again about 11... No, quarter to 11.

Closed. So I didn't get to drink any more coke because I had two cans of coke for the whole day. And during the night, I was actually feeling a bit better than I normally do, had a bit more energy than normal.

And I thought, what if it's because I haven't had as much coke as I normally drink? So when I was up... Andre, can you make a bit more noise, please? Thank you. Yeah, I was up all night. I made a few recordings last night during the night.

I was very pleased, but I went to bed satisfied for the first time in ages. I really felt like I've done a day's work, almost. What did I do? One, two, three, four.

So I ended up with six recordings produced and uploaded to the podcasts. So that was a really good night's work. And then I had... What did I have? I had something, I don't know what.

I had... Yeah, I had some breakfast while I was watching Blimey. He's going a bit weird, Andre is. He's getting a little bit excited with the slipper.

How does he manage to get so excited over the same slipper every day? I don't get it. Must be love. I suppose when you meet that perfect slipper, the slipper that's right for you, that's it, isn't it? You know, you never go back, I suppose.

Anyway, I wish to hit shut up so I could just do the recording because it's distracting. To me... Okay, what is... Yeah, I watched Cheers in the morning. I think I might have gone to sleep for a couple of hours, got really tired, and then I woke up, watched Cheers, had some breakfast, and then I went back to bed.

And when I woke up, I had an awful headache, which I probably would attribute to a bit of a detox for the coke, but I haven't had any coke for... It's weird, just... I had to take some headache tablets, and I was in bed all day, and I ended up getting up about... I don't know, it was half six. And I felt okay. I had a nice sleep.

I woke up and I was so comfy. It was nice. And I haven't had a headache since, but earlier, wow, wow.

Wow. So I went to the garage earlier, and I made a decision before going there that I wasn't going to buy any cokes, that I was just going to... Having gone through the whole day with a headache and managing to get through it, I thought, no, I just won't drink coke anymore. So I didn't drink hardly any yesterday, none today.

And I got to the garage, and there was this... It's quite weird. I didn't realize that the coke packs in the fridge could talk until I got in there, and they were saying, Jason, remember me, come and buy me. Remember how lovely I taste, especially when I'm cold, out of the fridge.

Oh, come and buy me. And what I decided instead, because I only had... What did I have? Five, six, seven. You got about 10 pound altogether.

Some cash and I think three pound in the bank. Five, six, seven. Yeah, about 10 pound.

So what I did is I bought four cans of lager for my friend, who I promised I was going to get then for him on Wednesday because he cut my hair. That was sort of payment. Not really payment, because he didn't want payment, but I just... That's what I said I'd do.

I got that, and I got myself a big thing of milk for my breakfast and for tea and coffee and stuff. I didn't get any coke. Once I bought that, I didn't have enough to get cokes anyway, because it left me with I think about three pound that I've got left.

And it was part of me as I was walking back thinking, perhaps I'll just drink these cans of lager. And then I was thinking, I don't want to go back to that. So I used to drink really, really regularly when I was younger.

When I was sort of in the 30s and 40s, up to about five years ago, or four years ago, I was drinking sometimes every day, every day for months and months and months, and then I'd have like a little break, or I'd be too old to drink. But only in the evenings, I never used to drink during the day. It was only cans of lager, and I always limited myself to six cans.

And if I just had a, like a limit, six was the most. And then, which is weird, because I can't drink six pints in a pub. It's too much for me.

Though a can of lager isn't, I don't think it's always a pint, is it? But it's over a long period of time, you know, it starts early evening till sometimes, I guess, early hours of the morning. But I just, I lost my appetite for alcohol. So I stopped drinking it.

So I'm one of these, I'm one of these people, I've got to say, a lot of people say that, isn't it? You know, the kind of person that I am, I did, because I got medication that I take, I don't mix medication and alcohol. So if I've, it's okay for, you know, if I take the medication in the morning, and I'm drinking in the evening, if I'm drinking in the evening, I want to take the medication, which means it's a choice between the two. And, you know, I think I need to be choosing the medication.

So that's what I chose. So if I take the medication in the morning, I'm just tired. I'm taking the evening, it just seems to be a better time for me.

So I stopped drinking years ago, really. I thought I will drink if I go out. It's a wedding.

You know, I will always have a drink at a wedding. Or if I go out for a meal, and there's alcohol, I'll have a drink. I just don't drink at home.

And then, so what I did is I brought the largest home and I took them to my friend and gave them to him. And then I made myself a coffee, had some cheese on toast. So even without drinking a Coke, now that I'm not drinking a Coke, my stomach feels better.

And I used to always feel hungry, but not hungry. I had a sort of certain feeling that I needed to eat, but I didn't actually have an appetite, which might have been due to the sugar intake. I don't know.

But the last time I stopped drinking Coke, I lost weight. I slimmed down a little bit. And it's not even necessarily for health reasons.

It's financially, because Coke, I know, in some ways, it's not that much more expensive to drink alcohol than it is Coke now. It is, but not that much more. So, well, it is, I suppose, but probably the alcohol's more expensive than it used to be.

Mind you, so are socks. Yeah, I remember. Oh, blimey.

And I worked out, if I pay £3.50 a day, let's work it out. Let's work it out, man. £3.50 a day.

Let's have a look. Let's have a look. So £3.50 a day times by 365, £1,277 a year.

£3.50 times by 365. That's, let's say, that's if I get them from the garage. That's four cans.

Now, realistically, I could get them cheaper. £3.50, I could get them from the shop for £2.70, I think, before. Times by 365, that's £985 a year.

So if you mix a mixture between getting them from the shop and getting them from the garage, you're doing a thousand. So let's say £985 a year. So I'm 50 now.

Times that. So between now, when I reach 100, I've spent £49,000, £275 on Coca-Cola, just in 50 years, just on a fizzy drink. Nearly £50,000.

So yeah, I'm hoping that I'll have a little bit more energy. And also, I've decided that I want to put more time, more effort, more energy, more love into what I'm doing, the recordings, which is also going to include, you know, more education, educating myself, you know, just things like that. But producing more relaxation, more sleep sessions, more pain release sessions is what I want to do.

And as well as other stuff, I mean, I've just done Sleeping Beauty for the Jason's Bedtime... Bedstories? Bedside? Bedtime? Bed... I don't know. Bedtime... Something like that. So I've recorded a new one of those.

So I want to try and do one of those every day. I want to try and do a sleep hypnosis, a deep sleep whisper every day, as well as these every day. So that's three.

And then I want to do a relaxation session every day. So relaxation for stress, just a relaxation session. So that'll be, that'll be two because one will be with music.

So that's five. I'd like to do a sleep hypnosis session, just like a normal sleep hypnosis session. So I can do that.

So that'd be one with music, one without. So that's seven. And a chronic pain release session.

So that's another eight. So I'm looking to be doing at least five recordings a day, if not more, from now onwards. And I want to spend my evenings, like during the night, doing it.

That's my plan. That is the plan. It doesn't mean it's going to work out exactly, but it will.

Yeah, it will be cool. I did it last night and the results show straight away, if that makes sense. And I don't quite know why, but the results.

So statistics, the thing that you all are hearing about. So today, 5,415 downloads. It's like a huge, huge, huge, huge rise.

There's still three hours left of the day to go. So it's quite strange that I've noticed that even for, let's say, the Deep Sleep Whisperer, I released one yesterday. I hadn't released one since the 13th.

So it's the 18th yesterday. So five days. Yet the rise was huge.

The day before was 232. Today, 716. So it's almost as if people also download the other ones as well.

I just don't understand. I didn't understand that. I won't talk about stats anymore.

Now, the Let Me Fall Into Sleep stats haven't really, hasn't really made any difference because I do these every day anyway, near enough. So today, I've had 255 downloads. Monday was very low, but Sunday, 305.

Total, 176,627 for the Let Me Fall Into Sleep so far. So that'll be not long before that's 200,000. Do you remember when I was saying, please help me get to 100,000, and no one did? Do you remember that? And now I'm nearly at 200,000.

I'm not even really taking much notice anymore. Blimey. Isn't it amazing? Isn't it strange? I'm just getting myself comfortable.

I'll have a little drink of my tea. I'll tell you something that I noticed. I can't drink strong tea.

But in the past, I used to love strong tea. Isn't it weird? I'm talking that I love it. Proper Yorkshire brew, I used to love that.

Now, I had to get rid of them. I gave them away. And how do you keep tea bags away, you may ask? And I stuck them on the pavement outside my house, you know, free to a good home.

I've got Tetley tea bags now, and they're mild, and they're just lovely. I can't drink strong tea. It actually gives me sort of almost a bit of heartburn.

So there must be, I must have some kind of acidic reaction to moi. One thing is if I end up being a tea drinker, I might end up with like yellow teeth or straight, well, they're pretty bright white, but because I used to drink tea years ago, I noticed it used to get a bit, get a little bit staining on the tea. Not coffee so much, but tain.

Is it the tazin, resin, bazin, nezin, tannin? I said tannin or something in the tea. You know what? It's still probably better than drinking Coke and drinking lager alcohol. So it's all right.

If I end up drinking tea all day long, which I probably won't. I do also like drinking water. So I've got quite a few bottles of water in here, and I drink, at the moment, I'm getting through about one bottle of water a day, I'd say.

It's a one, what is it, 1.2 liter or one point, yeah, 1.5 liter bottle of Buxton still water. And I drink it, I can drink about, oh, love water. When I'm thirsty, it's the best thing for me.

And I do like, okay, I used to like a can of Coke. When I was thirsty, I'd just drink down loads, like, oh, bubble, bubble, bubble, bubble. But even going down, I could feel that my esophagus was not built for Coca-Cola.

You know, it's almost just, yeah. So as far as, I don't want to use the word addiction, but as far as cravings go, I think Coca-Cola is not the worst one in the world, you know? And I have other cravings that I cannot fulfill, and I'm okay with that. And those cravings are way stronger, or have been way stronger than drinking Coke.

You can't just, you know, just got to accept that you can't do everything all the time. Ghetto. Oh, I love a ghetto.

I must have a sweet tooth. I never realized I had a sweet tooth. I never really thought of myself as being a sweet tooth person.

Because when it comes to eating, if I'm hungry, I don't want to eat something sweet. I want to eat something savory. I'd much rather eat a sausage roll when I'm hungry than eat a chocolate bar.

Genuinely. For me, a chocolate bar is never when I'm hungry. It's because I want the chocolate.

You know, I think in some ways, when you're hungry, eating a chocolate bar is almost the opposite of feeding the hunger. You know, I've had a Mars bar sometimes when I'm hungry. It doesn't do the job.

For me, anyway. If anything, it just makes me want to eat food. So I do prefer food.

That'll be the title of this recording. I do prefer food. I like to eat sometimes.

Yes. Yes. Yeah, I quite like the idea is that I had an option today to buy some coats.

The fridge was full of them. It's not like I didn't have the option. I could have bought a coat.

But I chose not to. And it was a choice. And I think having the choice is better rather than not being able to afford to buy it.

Really, Andre? Stop laughing at me. See, if I hadn't had the choice, if I had to go, you know, I need to get some milk. So let's say I had enough money, £1.50 or whatever it was to buy the milk.

And that's all I had. Then I would have, it would have been harder to not buy the coat. Easier, you know, in the sense of not being able to.

But I think it would have been more emotionally annoying. Because I didn't, I couldn't say no, because I had to say no, I didn't choose to say no. But in this situation, I chose, I walked into the same fridge as the coats, looked at it, thought about it.

I got the beers from a friend, the lovers, walked up to the fridge compartment. And then I turned around and was about to go back to the fridge and get coats instead. And I thought, you know, focus on how I feel now.

Focus on how I physically feel different to how I did earlier when I had the headache. And also when I was drinking coke and I didn't have, there was like a constant need to eat and not without an appetite. Never really felt particularly good physically.

And last night, and now actually, really, I'm feeling fairly okay. My stomach's not chewing in a way like it normally does. For food, and I've had some food, I had cheese on toast earlier.

I'll have something to eat later on. So that's, yeah, so I chose not to drink the cokes. I mean, it's out of my hand now.

I can't buy any cokes anyway, because I spent all my cash on the beers, my friend, and the milk. But regardless of that, it was, you know what? I could have got a different coke, like a different can of something, couldn't I? I could have got orangina or something. Or not Pepsi, because that'd be doing the same thing, wouldn't it, really, I suppose.

I could have got different drinks, like Corona. I don't know if they still sell Corona. And iron brew, so you know, that kind of stuff.

Lilt, I used to love Lilt. Genuinely, Lilt was my favourite drink of all time, for a period of time. It was, oh, so nice.

Lilt. So I don't even know if it's still made. It might not be made anymore.

I don't know, should I check? Lilt. Lilt. I put in Lilt, it says a characteristic rising and falling of the voice when speaking, a pleasant general accent.

Okay, I've got another one. Lilt is a brand of soft drink manufactured by the Coca-Cola Company and sold in the United Kingdom, Ireland, Gibraltar, and Sicilies only. During the 1970s, 1890s and 2000s, Lilt was promoted with the advertising mogul, Logan, the totally tropical taste.

So America never had Lilt. It's really nice. Here's a question, does Lilt contain caffeine? If you want to avoid, if you want to avoid caffeine, try a caffeine-free diet Coke, or the other caffeine-free sparkling soft drinks, such as Fanta, Sprite, or Lilt.

Did you know a mug of tea contains about 75 milligrams of caffeine, while a mug of coffee contains 100 megabytes, megabytes? Mg of caffeine. You'd think that coffee would have a lot more caffeine in there. It does have more, but not a lot more.

A mug of tea, 75 mg, is it mega, milligrams, milligrams, is it? Megagrams. So 75 milligrams of caffeine, mug of coffee, 100 milligrams of caffeine. What's the worst fizzy drink for you? These are questions on Google.

Once in a while, soft drinks are fine, but you should avoid the top 10 worst types of soft drinks. Cola. Some of the most popular sodas in the world use the flavor of the cola nut in their drinks.

Orange, orange, Andre, shush. So the next one is orange soda. Well, cream soda.

Really? Root beer and ginger beer. I can't drink ginger beer anymore. It gives me heartburn for some reason.

It's a shame because I used to love ginger beer. Energy drinks, sweetened iced tea, tonic water, and sports drinks. What? You're covering everything there.

He says, what's the worst drink for you? Drink 10 drinks you should never drink. Juice, whether it's fresh squeezed or pasteurized and from a carton. Juice is a quick way to add calories.

So if it's from a carton, he says don't drink it. Sugary coffee drinks. Well, if you start making coffee, Mr. Coffee, Mr. and Mrs. Coffee Producer, start making coffee that's sweet.

We won't need to put sugar in, will we? Soda. That covers a wide variety of things. Sweetened nut milks.

See, that's what vegetarians and vegans sort of will eat or drink. So it's bad for us then, right? I'm not a vegetarian or vegan, but I used to be. I think I used to be everything.

The only thing I've never been is a trapeze artist. That's about it. Protein shakes.

Protein shakes. Why are they bad? They're full of vitamins, they're full of calcium. The only reason a protein shake I could see would be bad for someone is if they don't actually do anything.

If you're sitting around drinking a protein shake, then it's not what it's for. It's for people that are working out hard. Sports drinks.

Again, sports drinks are for people that are working hard to get those electrolytes and stuff back. Pre-bottled smoothies. Really? I love pre-bottled smoothies.

Why don't I just say bottled smoothies? Pre-bottled. Do you mean pre-bottled? Put it in a bottle first. Yeah, I know.

I bought it. It was in a bottle. Would you say bottled? No, pre-bottled.

No, just bottled. It's in a bottle. Why are fizzy drinks? Why are they bad for you? Diet soft drinks may not be as bad for you as those containing sugar, the Daily Well reported.

People who drink more than one fizzy soft drink a day are up to 60% more likely to develop obesity and high blood pressure. Wow. That was in 2007, so it doesn't count.

What is the healthiest beverage you can drink? Water. Water is the best choice for quenching your thirst. I agree.

Coffee and tea without added sweetness are healthy choices too. Some beverages should be limited or consumed in moderation, including fruit juice, milk, and those made with low-calorie sweeteners like diet drinks. Is there something you can get actually? I forget what it's called, my friend bought it for me and it was from the health food shop.

It's this liquid, it's almost like a squeezy bottle. It looked a bit like honey, but it wasn't. It was a natural sweetener, just natural, without any chemicals or anything like that.

I think it was from somewhere. Well, put it in my tea, coffee. I only ever have one cup of coffee a day normally.

I say that with such pride and then like I have four cans of Coke, but I only have one cup of coffee. You can squeeze that in and you wouldn't even know. You know, it goes together with your coffee like you could have had sugar in it.

And you can do the same with breakfast cereal, just sweet. Technically, I suppose you could do that with honey, couldn't you? Not sure about coffee, but you can do that with breakfast cereal. I used to do that.

I used to put honey on breakfast cereal, specifically. Wow. When I was unwell, years ago, with my stomach problems I had when I was 24, I used to go to the health food shop and I used to have cornflakes in the morning and I used to have honey, you know, like some pure honey on top rather than sugar.

And I'd watch the X-Men cartoons in the morning. Then I'd go to the toilet. Don't know why I'm telling you that, but I used to love the X-Men cartoons.

I really, really loved it. And this was long before they made the movies. Apparently, green tea is the healthiest beverage on the planet.

It's loaded with antioxidants and nutrients that have powerful effects on the body. This includes improved brain function, fat loss, a lower risk of various different things. So green tea.

Wow. Imagine if I started to get healthy, start to put a little bit of effort in. What's the most unhealthy food? Sugary drinks.

See, I've only cut the tea there. There's sugar in there. How did... I don't understand how people can drink tea without sugar or coffee.

Never been able to do it. It's horrible. Coffee even more so because it's so bitter.

Maybe, I mean, some people are just bitter on the inside. So maybe it suits their personality, but I just can't. And my dad and his wife, they drink, I don't think they have any sugar in their coffee or tea.

I'm not even sure if they have milk. It's like, wow, how? I know that we get used to things, you know, we may be able to manage to readapt, readjust. But how do you get to the point? Because for me, okay, I'll give an example.

When I moved, if you don't need to drink coffee, you don't, you know, you don't need to drink tea or coffee. Why don't? So if suddenly, if there's no sugar in the cupboard, or I've run out of sugar, I don't drink tea, I don't drink coffee. I don't put myself through that because I don't have to.

You know, I'm not that bothered about drinking coffee or tea. In fact, this cup of tea here is probably the first one I've had this year. I'm having now.

But I do drink coffee every morning. Because I don't know why. Why do I have a coffee every morning? I just do.

It's a routine. I say every morning, but when I had my breakfast, so in the afternoon, I'll have a cup of coffee, have me brekkie. And yeah, it's a nice start to the day.

But is it? Perhaps if I had green tea. I've gone through periods when I've been quite healthy, actually, purposefully healthy, going to, going out of my way to do stuff. So for example, I remember years ago, I bought these antitoxins.

What were they? They were strips that stuck onto the bottom of my feet. And they were supposed to withdraw basically antoxicants, antitoxins and antioxidants. So to draw out that bad stuff out of my feet.

So I'd leave them on my feet at night. And then when I wake up, no, pull them off. So and they'd be absolutely filthy.

But really, you know, I don't know quite how useful they were, whether it was just sweat or just whether it would have been like that regardless of, you know, if I was healthy or unhealthy. But wow, I couldn't believe like, wow. What other things have I done? Did I have a similar thing? Should I do a similar thing? Oh yeah, when I was, when I was doing a volunteering at the drug rehab place, they had a lady there that was, she did acupuncture of the ears.

And what she would do sometimes, she'd put these things on your ears, special, I don't know what they were, but they're supposed to be detoxing things. And she'd, it was quite weird because sometimes she'd put them on my ears as well. I think she did it once while I was actually making a recording.

Not recording when I was actually, well I was recording it, but when I was doing a session and she was putting it in my ear while I was actually talking, I was like, now you can relax. So these needles going in there, but she was lovely. And it seemed to really work for people.

It seemed to have a really, really calming effect. So we'd mix together, her doing that and me doing my thing. So she'd put all people with needles in first into their ears, the acupuncture or ear acupuncture.

And then they'd be sitting there for, I don't know, 20 minutes, half an hour while I just talked and relaxed at them deeply. And it was okay, you know, it was quite cool. I quite liked it.

Yeah, I'd quite like, I would like to get a bit more in the healthy zone. Yeah, I would get myself a bit more sorted physically. A bit of the anti-toxin stuff.

Maybe I'll get some green tea. And I suppose in a way it'd be good if I just was able to stop all sugar completely. Because there's so much sugar anyway in a lot of food.

And I could probably get by. Well, I don't know, because to not have any sugar, which means not eating any processed food, really, including bread. Bread is supposed to be really not very good for us anyway.

So I've been eating bread for years. I like bread. I really do.

My favourite, oh, my favourite bread, let me tell you this. Two things. Firstly, it has to be fresh, you know, the fresher the better.

I'm not a big fan of the, you know, when you get the bread and it's already in a bag and it's already been cut. And you know, yeah, it's fresh. Fair enough.

I used to work in a bakery and I know they're fresh, you know, they're only a few hours old. And but to have a loaf of bread that's just come out of the oven, get it home, and just to eat it with some butter, marmalade, margarine or something like that. And some marmalade or some jam or whatever else you want to have on it.

Oh, man. And even toast, fresh bread with toast, it tastes, honestly, like 73 times better than just normal bread being toasted. If it's really, the fresher it is, the better it tastes.

I do wish I lived near a supermarket. I live so far from anything. It'd be lovely.

I mean, I could if I had a car, if I could drive. I can't drive, I'm not allowed to drive because of my medication. But I can't drive anyway.

But, you know, I can get to the supermarket, but it's, by the way, for those who noticed I lisp, I know I lisp. And I also whistle a little bit. I don't mean to.

I'm trying to figure out what's happened to my mouth that has caused me to have a lisp and to have a bit of a, like a whistle sometimes when I talk. The only thing I can think is at the bottom of my gums, my left side on the bottom, I've got two teeth that were removed, not the same time, but over like 20 years. And it didn't take 20 years to remove them.

I'm just saying it was like a 20 years gap. And I don't know. I don't know if that's a reason.

Maybe I'm not pronouncing my words correctly, but I would. I would argue possibly that I pronounce my words more clearly now than I ever used to due to the amount of talking I do, due to the amount of recordings I make. Not always.

I mean, I do. I'm sure I slur at times and, you know, maybe not even comprehensible at times. But generally, I'd say I'm fairly clear.

I like to think I am, otherwise people wouldn't listen. But when I listen back, there are bits that are just slurred like that at the end of a word. So, yes.

So, so. And I don't mean to do that. I mean, genuinely, I don't, I want to do that.

But what can I do? I'll try, try and, I'll try and talk fairly softly when I make this recording. I've even got the microphone further away so that hopefully there's less in the way of any kind of distortion or too much loudness at any point. I'll whistle again.

Maybe I need to go to elocution lessons.

do you know how to become an electrician so I might stop eating fresh bread what just bread I don't eat fresh bread I buy bread oh my god you know what I just realized just realized something oh my goodness I am a goodness just realized I ordered and I got a delivery tomorrow and okay got delivery tomorrow okay you ready you ready for this and I well I basically ordered I just put in what I ordered last week I can't remember what I ordered last week just to fill the slot up and I was gonna

update it and put in actually what I wanted to get well are you ready for this it's after 11 o'clock so I can no longer change the order I'm no longer be changed so well I've got stuff coming that it's not not too bad okay well stuff that I don't even need and also there's not enough and guess what else is on there you ready coca-cola yep 24 cans of coca-cola are coming tomorrow you couldn't make it up I knew that I had to I knew I knew that I needed to change the order by

11 o'clock but I just forgot it's only when I looked at the time on the tablet just now I looked at it it's 11 o'clock good thing is I've got a Haagen-Dazs ice cream coming it's nice but the rest is just some breakfast cereal one pizza some tea cakes bread potatoes bananas some yogurts sausage rolls some muffins some milk cheese just a few little bits really the most important ones really is I guess the milk the milk and the yeah I've got Alpen so I do like that it's weird my orders so I've given the

order it's not saying how many are in each two times 19 products 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 19 products well why don't I just buy that just one of each that doesn't make sense plus I normally get two loaves of bread this generally I put one in the freezer and then I'd have one I'd have it for a couple of days as bread what else I'm gonna have it as treacle today will be a cricket umpire and and then I put it

in the freezer after a couple of days so I can have it as toast so let's say if that comes I suppose it does come 120 1 8 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 25 45 46 47 48 49 so the price yeah it's 45 44 Wow I messed that up didn't I unless I get a chance to make another order probably book a slot a book a slot Thursday it's gone Wednesday of course that's gone Friday now maybe I'll order some

more stuff for Friday and stuff that I actually need but then a delivery slots three pound oh no Friday can you believe they charge you three pound fifty for for an afternoon slot Saturday Wow 9 a.

m.

and six pound fifty to deliver on a Saturday morning can you believe it that's amazing that's absolutely amazing am amazed I really am yeah so maybe that's what I do I'll order something for Friday well just logged out by accident cancel more view order add order trolley so I'll save that I've been this time I'm gonna change it so if I save it then I can change it I'll get rid of the cokes blindly oh dear oh dear I can't get 24 cans we'd have to drink them I'm supposed to I can't believe I spend

an hour talking about how I'll stop drinking coke and then I realized that I've ordered 24 cans yeah I ordered them four days ago or three days ago or something yeah I think it was Thursday so it's now Tuesday with every intention of because I just basically booked the last order I had and saved it so the slot was saved but none which is what I've just done now for Friday a man really so there you go it's almost humorous almost anyway isn't it weird now that I've come to the end of recording Andre goes

to sleep bless him so I'm gonna go thank you for listening remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy lots of love