#474 Let me bore you to sleep

Hello and welcome to Jason Newland dot com. And a fly has appeared crawling all over my breakfast bowl. Well, crawling all over, it's not giant, but it's where that came from.

Yeah, my name is Jason Newland. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. This is let me bore you to sleep.

I have to get myself organized so that I make the least amount of noise as possible. Possible. Oh, great.

Now my ears are ringing. Do you forget that we just is? It's almost like I just got underwater. I say that as if I know what it's like to well, no, I do whenever bath I go underwater.

Got a massive bath. I have to wear you know, those little inflatable things you put on your arms. I have to wear them when I get in the bath.

So I'm really little and the bath is really big. I have a little styrene foam, little board, little whiteboard thing that I can just hold in my hands and I can paddle and pretend I'm swimming. See, I used to have swimming lessons when I was at one of my junior schools.

Now, I was quite lucky really, because I don't think well, I said I don't think I mean, I don't know. But I went to how many schools that I go to one, work it backwards. One, two, three, four, five, six, probably at least six different schools, maybe more.

And only one of them had a swimming pool. I don't know why there's that. I think it's been hibernation.

There was just a rhythm again. A rhythm arrived and get off my neck. I'm not food.

And yeah, I had a swimming pool in Africa. It's like being in Africa, get off. Stop.

That would annoy me. I mean, I don't know if it's like that in Africa. And, you know, you know, all the TV shows and the films, they show flies everywhere.

Like, even in was it the wildlife parks, and the cow and lions and just flies everywhere. It's like, it's gotta be annoying. Just one annoys me.

So yeah, I would have this. I didn't have a swimming pool. There was a swimming pool in the what's it the school.

And because I couldn't swim, I was given swimming lessons. I think they asked the students, is there anyone here that can't swim? Because we've got swimming lessons. And I said, Yeah, I can't swim.

And he said, Well, would you like a swimming lesson? I think I might have said yes, because I had swimming lessons. Unless it wasn't optional. I don't know.

It's hard to remember. It's a long time ago. Since when I was about nine years old.

So I'm really, really sure. I did like the school. I did.

I liked actually, I could say, I learned about school. Sometimes I didn't like high school, but I did like junior school. I didn't mind it, because it was easy.

You know, it was easy. It was in some ways a lot more creative. There's a lot more kind of things like play and that kind of stuff.

High school just, for me was very, just unenjoyable, really. But junior school, I reckon I went to one of the best, well, I went to all three in the town that I lived in. So I can definitely say I went to the best one.

So I went to three different ones. And the last one I went to, so I went to one when I very first moved there, being with my dad and his new wife. And I was seven.

So that'd be 1977, September, I guess, I went there. And then we moved. So I don't know how long I was there for.

Maybe I was there for a whole year. No, no, no, no, I definitely wasn't there for a whole year. I think I was there for maybe a term, maybe a term and a half, maybe two terms.

And then we moved. And then I started going to another school, which was closer. And I was at that school when my little brother was born.

And he was born the day before my eighth birthday. So, yeah. And then we moved out of that house.

Unless I was there for, no. I'm just trying to think. Unless I did start there at eight.

No. Really? No. I was there before eight.

But I would have left, yeah, I'd have finished the other, yeah. No, no, definitely. Because he wasn't even, yeah, we were there for quite a while before he popped out at my mom's bum.

So, yeah, we definitely were there. So, because when I was in the other junior school, I had an operation to have my adrenals removed. And I was seven, still seven at that time, I think.

And then when I was eight, as I said, when my little brother was born, I got a golf set for my birthday present. Not a professional golf set, but a little putting thing, which was really good. And a stupid present to buy an eight-year-old.

I mean, what a weird present to buy an eight-year-old a golf set. I'm not, I mean, I liked it, but I was just like, thinking about it, it's a weird present, isn't it? But who knows why? But, you know, I'd have preferred a punch bag. I actually did say to my dad when I was about, I don't know how old I was, about nine, eight, nine, 10, that I wanted to learn martial arts.

And he said, no. The fact is there wasn't anywhere to go because I was too young. But he just wouldn't.

And then I got to about 10, I said again, I want to learn karate or kung fu. I want to do boxing, something like that. No, you can't.

So I had to wait until I was 14, and then I went to karate. At that time, at that point, no one cared. I really wanted to do it for years and years and years.

I'd have been good at it when I was little. I was pretty flexible, very quick, as are pretty much, I suppose, all kids. So, plus I had a, I think it was because I had a Bruce Lee picture poster on my wall of my bedroom at the age of seven.

Bruce Lee picture on my wall poster on my wall of my bedroom at the age of seven. I didn't know who he is. I didn't know who Bruce Lee was.

I mean, I hadn't just really become famous in the movies, and they were adult movies I wasn't allowed to watch. Never heard of him. So they, whoever put that out there, planted the seed in my head to want to be like Bruce Lee, want to be like Bruce Lee, which is why I ended up with such a great physique, and a bit oriental looking.

I do, I do, I like it. So I was a fan of Bruce Lee before even knowing what he did. And it was, the posters was from Enter the Dragon, the movie, Enter the Dragon, as opposed to the I don't know, the sex tape, I don't know, you know, it was a, it was a good, good film, one of my favourites.

I didn't get to see that till I was about 10. Admittedly, it was in 18. But at the age of 10, 11, I was watching zombie films, like the ones that were banned.

I was watching all that kind of stuff. It's weird, isn't it? I wasn't allowed to stay up late to watch, let me see, what would be on quite late, by the professionals, they used to be on fairly late, or Starsky and Hutch, or, you know, the things that when I was a little younger, when I was about 10, couldn't stay up, you know, I'd be in bed at half eight or eight o'clock. So I'd be in bed, hearing the rest of the family watching these zombie films, zombie flesh eaters is one, for example.

And all I could hear was the screaming of it. And then I could hear them and I could, then I could hear, you know, what was going on on the television as well, on the film and movie. And then, so I wasn't allowed to watch it.

But the next day, I could watch it when I got home from school, on my own. It's like, that was wrong. It was wrong.

So I saw all of those films. The only film I didn't see at that time was The Exorcist. So I think that had already been banned before.

But all the other ones like Shogun Assassin, Clockwork Orange, that's another one I didn't see because that had been banned. Although I don't know what year that was, was that 80s, wasn't it? So yeah, it's a weird, weird one. I like, I'll tell you one of my favourite films when I was really like little scanners, loved scanners.

That's the thing. I watched all these really horrible films when I was little. And as an adult, I don't really watch horror films much.

I prefer comedy. Or maybe, you know, like science fiction, superhero films I love. Romantic films? Nope.

No, no, no, no, no. No, I don't. I don't like, I can't be doing soppy stuff.

And sometimes they're good, you know, but I just, I don't mind if there's like a love affair involved in the actual film, you know, it's just part of it. But I don't want to watch a film about a love affair. That just, why? And something else that might surprise you.

I don't like sex scenes in a film. You may think, surely, you know what that fly is doing now? It's climbing all over the screen of my iPod, iPad. And that is wrong.

I'm not happy with that. Really out of order. Bloody fly.

I don't like seeing that stuff in a film. Not because I'm a prude, because I'm the complete opposite of a prude. I just don't think it's relevant.

You can see that anyway. I don't have to go to watch a movie to see that. So I want to see a movie.

What was that weird noise? I just had a cling. And I got my phone on silent. That shouldn't have happened.

Damn you. And I, yeah, if there's a little kiss and stuff, you know, that's nice. But it's not nice.

I don't want to see it. But you know, I don't want to hear it. I still have nightmares.

This time I was on a bus. And there's this couple, they were young. And they were kissing all the way through the journey.

Like at the back, all you hear is I love you. It's like, I felt sick. I had just eaten a raw kebab, but you know, that probably didn't help.

It's like, no, stop it. I mean, when I'm with someone, like romantically, I put earplugs in so I don't have to hear it. So if I'm kissing someone, I don't want to hear the sound.

I put earplugs. I wear those industrial hair earmuffs. Those big ones that people that drill the roads use.

It gets funny look sometimes. Especially if I'm in a restaurant. He was kissing his girlfriend in a restaurant and he put those big hair, those big earmuffs on.

It's just silly. Yeah, so I had the weirdest, weirdest bunch of dreams last night. I ended up getting out of bed.

I ended up getting up. I thought, no. I had three horrible dreams in a row.

And I thought, that's it. No, no, no, no, no. I basically sleep better during the day than I do at night.

That's the bottom line. Sleeping at night is not my thing. I can't even tell you why anymore.

It's sleeping during the day suits me. So I'm going to, just one fly is actually harassing me. How can one fly make such a difference to a life? And as it is, it's not as hot today as it was previous days inside.

But I've got the window closed and the curtains drawn closed shut in order to try and keep that background sound because it's only half three in the afternoon. Which means it's a little bit warmer. And now fly is just, it's basically going towards the screen.

So I've got the iPad screen on the table. Well, the iPad with the screen on and this screen of the Android tablet that I'm recording this on. So the fly is attracted to both those screens.

And in between that it's coming and licking my leg or doing something on my leg. I'm not quite sure. Well, well, I do know what it's doing, but I don't want to think about it because it's gross.

So yes, I got up, I ended up getting up. I went to bed early at 11 o'clock and I got up at four and I watched a movie. Now I've never done that in my life.

I've watched movies and I've got up at four, but I've never done a two to go because I was not going back to bed. That was it. And I stayed up, watched the movie and then I watched Cheers at 6.30, two episodes, about half.

In fact, I was so tired, I didn't get to watch the end of the second episode. I had to go back to bed because I was really tired and I slept well. But yes, at one point I fell asleep on my back and I've got sleep apnea, which means I stop breathing when I sleep, you know, sometimes, but mainly when I'm laying on my back, that's the main time.

So I try and sort of keep on my sides. But I actually was just quite, yeah, I was quite hot last night. So I was on my back, just resting.

I must've fallen asleep like that. And I woke up not being able to breathe. And I was really, I thought I was having a heart attack to be fair.

And took about 30 seconds to get back. I ended up standing there leaning against the wall, just, you know, the good thing is I know how to calm down really quickly. Now, that's really, I mean, it's taken me many years to learn really how to do that.

But it kicks in naturally now. So I was able to just think, well, if it is, let's get my breath back and call an ambulance. But rushing about is not going to do any good.

I need to just slow my breathing down. Allow the oxygen just, you know, the breathing just to get back to how it was. Slow my mind down.

You know, this all kind of happened naturally. So I was leaning against the wall. I just let it happen.

And although it was incredibly scary at the very beginning, it was sort of, as soon as it was done, now I was okay. You know, it didn't lead to a panic attack or anything, which in the past it would have done. But it didn't lead me to anything.

I just, I focused on how I was feeling afterwards and I was feeling okay. And go away, Mr. Fly. So that was quite nice to know that you can allow your body and your mind to just calm down.

Naturally. If you allow it to, and that's the best thing to do in the event of an emergency as well, is to be calm. And I know it's easy to say that, but when it happens naturally, that's really good.

And I would say that's the way, that's the natural way of things, is for calmness to happen naturally. If we have a, have a bit of faith in ourselves. Yeah.

So I made a couple of changes yesterday as well. I put the adverts, oh goodness, I put the adverts back on the podcasts. Now the reason for this, I'm just going to have a little drink here, this is going to be a lovely sound.

The reason for that, it's very, very simple. I've talked about it on and off for years, I think. I need to cover my costs, but I don't like asking for help.

And in the current financial situation of this country and probably the world, I don't want to keep asking people to help financially, because we've all got our own stuff to deal with. And I just want to be here to offer this free service without anything else, you know, without asking for anything. And I was only asking, I have asked and I've received a lot of help, just to cover the costs.

And sometimes I cover the costs, sometimes I don't. I never cover all the costs, because there's excess costs that are kind of hidden with it. So paying off the shed, the studio, recording studio, still paying off, you know, paying off the iPad, the phone, still paying off the tablet that I use to record the recordings, the things with.

And, you know, it's just lots of different things. Includes software and apps that I buy to help edit, those little bits and bobs that kind of add up. So I'm going to leave the adverts on now, and that's it.

And it is solely to cover the costs, that's all I'm doing it for. And it will hopefully do that, which means I won't keep ending up with no money in the bank, like zero. And, you know, which is a bit frustrating.

That's why I'm doing it, if I wasn't so successful, I wouldn't have all these expenses. Successful. But realistically, if I only had, you know, like 100 recordings, and maybe, you know, 300 people listening, then it would cost me a lot less.

You know, but that's not the case. I do have, I worked it out, I think, it's not 100%, but I've worked out about 13,000 listeners throughout the month on my recordings. And then 100, I don't know how many it was, 139,000 downloads, I think, last month, which is basically just plays.

I think it's a mixture between people downloading them and playing them. But most people stream these days. So there's about 13,000 listeners, I did work it out a couple of weeks back.

But it's hard, it's hard to say for sure. Because each podcast, I can see how many listeners there have been. So it's, you know, for the month, and each podcast, it's just, it's a bit strange, but it's not an actual, an actual, it's not a factual science, it's not exact.

It's just okay, I don't mind. I didn't mind that. It's got to be at least 100 people listening, isn't it? It's got to be, I'm just thinking, because not everybody's going to listen every day.

Some people will, but not everybody. Some people might only listen once a week. Some people might listen, you know, four or five times a day.

But, you know, I think there's going to be some people that maybe listen every couple of weeks, and maybe listen twice a week as a mixture. So not quite sure how it's, how it all works out. But 13,000 still, that's a lot, isn't it? For someone like me.

So if there is really 13,000 people listening, where are you all at? Where are you? Where? Honestly, I don't know. Because I know people that listen, I've got a Facebook page specifically for this podcast, Let Me Bore You To Sleep. And just got a Facebook, Let Me Bore You To Sleep.

Also on my other Facebook pages, Twitter and everything. And there's only a handful of people that actually contact me. Okay, more than a handful, but there's only like maybe 20 or 30 people that actually will sort of contact me.

There's not many out of, I don't know how many hundreds of people listen to this particular podcast regularly. Again, I don't know. Because it's on various different podcasts.

It's not just on this one. So an average day, I probably get about 1000 downloads and plays per episode. Sometimes less, maybe sometimes more.

So that's 365,000 a year, just sort of Let Me Bore You To Sleep. So I'm thinking it must be more than 30 people listening. Maybe if you're listening to this now, and you see this posted on Facebook, maybe go to my Facebook page, and just click underneath this episode.

Uncle JJ, I listen. I really do. I listen.

Just let me know. Even if I've never heard from you before. Just let me know.

It'd be interesting to see who listens. Or yeah, just out of interest really. So at the moment, all of my recordings are still available on the website.

You can download them for free. There's three different ways to download them. Plus, you can stream them.

Which is not bad, is it? You can download three different ways. Plus, you can stream. So you can go, if you go to the page of latest, or just go to the home page, you'll see the latest recordings.

Or you can click on the Let Me Bore You To Sleep or the Deep Sleep Whisper, whatever. And it gives you all the different ones that are on there. So if you click on the image of, let's say, whatever number this is, you can play it.

So you can just stream it there and then on your phone or, well, most people use phones. You listen, but it could be on your iPad, it could be on your television or whatever. I'm waiting for this to fly.

Not now. I'm not in the mood. I've got a headache.

And so that's, you can stream it. Of course, you can stream it other places as well, which most people do. Spotify, iTunes, Google Play, CastBox, Luminary, Stitcher, lots of different places.

But on the actual website, you can play it, you can stream it. On the player, where you click the play button, there's a download button where you can just download instantly. Or underneath the player, there's a download button, which you just click, and it downloads instantly.

Or you can go to higher up on the page where it says to buy. And it's free to buy. And you can download it that way as well.

If you do it that way, I'll be able to see who's downloaded. So you can leave your information, leave your name and stuff, and I can see who's downloaded it. Because at the moment, I don't know how many people are downloading from the website, because most people just do it the easy way, which I do understand.

I'd probably do that myself. Before I had it that way, before I made it easier, I used to get a fair few downloads. But now, because it's, you know, you just go there, you just click on the button, click on the download now icon, and it's done.

It's very simple. So, plus you can stream. There's not a lot of point downloading stuff these days, really, unless... I suppose the benefit would be, first of all, there's no adverts on a download.

So you can download it and you can listen to it on replay on your phone, or just listen to it for the duration. You know, so you could do that way or put it on your iPad or your tablet or your PC or your television or whatever you've got. Running out of things.

Or your watch. I suppose some of the watches do it, don't they? Your ankle bracelet. I don't know.

So, stop buzzing around. Can you hear it? Going, going. Got a wee blooming fly.

So you've got that. And I think that's why, you know, I know some people like to listen to the podcasts continuously. I actually had a friend who said, just charge, put adverts on it, it's okay.

But she's actually got a subscription with Spotify, which means she doesn't hear any adverts. I love that because I do, it's all right, don't worry people. Yeah, it's all right for you.

So I don't get anything from people that listen. As far as I'm aware, I don't get anything, any kind of anything from people that listen on the Spotify premium. But that is a way to do it.

So if you listen on Spotify premium, and I imagine it's the same for all of them, Stitcher, all of the different ones, maybe Apple podcasts as well, I don't know, where you get an adverts if you pay for their subscription. So that's another way of doing it. And I don't know how much Spotify charges.

I've been with Spotify, I've been with Apple Music, and I've been with iTunes. iTunes have just deleted my stuff because I couldn't, I had to cancel it. I think it was yesterday.

I didn't realise it was so soon because I cancelled it and I wouldn't have enough to pay for it. And I went on there this afternoon to listen to something that wasn't on there. I was so disappointed.

I just wanted to listen to the Cranberries album. There's No Need to Argue. I think it is, yes.

And it was like, sorry, mate, you don't exist anymore. Like, oh, thanks. I completely cut me off.

I really didn't even show me my playlist anymore. Nothing. I was really disappointed.

I was like, come on, man. They showed me my playlist before, like when I went on there. And now I go to the library, looking for your music.

Music purchased from your iTunes store will appear here. And then it's got a little icon, not playing. It's like, really? My library, nothing in there anymore.

Library, nothing for you. Browse. Really? So I just pressed on something that says, probably heard that just then, it's quite quiet though.

Play and download 16 million songs, $9.99 a month. So basically, it's run out. It's like, oh, but why? I quite like iTunes.

And I do use it fairly often. But now it's gone. But hopefully, in October, because the adverts from this month get paid in October, at the end of October, which means I will be able to then cover the costs of at least the podcasts and the WhatsApps, the website.

And so I'll have a bit more money to be able to just do the things, pay for food and bills, and just general stuff. However, knowing myself, I'll probably get rid of the adverts before then. I need to just not think about it, just leave them on there.

I don't know why it surprises me. So there was a comment on, I think it was one of the iTunes podcasts, Deep Sleep One, Deep Sleep Whisper. And it's quite a fairly popular podcast, that one.

I've got a quite a, I would say, a strong audience for that, that particular podcast. Yeah. The only comment, I think two comments I had was bloody adverts.

I don't like the adverts. So it seems that the public are less, they're more likely to post a negative comment than a positive one, which I find a bit of a shame, really. Yeah, I don't mind if it's... YouTube's a little bit better, I find.

YouTube's... I've always been fairly okay with YouTube. I've had my moments over the years, but generally it's fairly positive feedback that I get on YouTube. And some people have been following me for years, like 10, 12 years or whatever.

So they're quite, you know, sometimes they're quite cheeky saying, oh, you're looking old. You know, you look like David Bellamy now with your beard, stuff like that. But I don't get much in the way of horrible comments.

Although I have, you know, but not... My tummy's all fizzy. It's full of pop. Yeah.

I'd like to see more positive comments on the actual podcasts themselves. In the comments, you know, section of, I don't know, Spotify. Is there a comment section in Spotify? Is... I know there is in iTunes.

Is there a comment section in Stitcher? I think there is. So maybe I could leave a nice comment. Yeah.

I don't know. Or adequate one. You could just leave a comment saying, yeah, I listened to your recording.

That could be it. Yeah, I listened. You could literally put just, uh, at the end of it.

Or, yep, I listened. I listened to the whole damn thing. Never going to get that hour back.

So yeah, it's up to you. I think what it is, because maybe I'm too dynamic. I'm too exciting, too dynamic, too... I've got just too much energy.

I think that's what it is. Too energetic. Or maybe I'm too boring.

And by the end of an hour of listening to me, you're possibly a bit tired. Yeah. It could be it.

I think it would be a background sound in the garden. But don't worry about it. Don't worry about it, man.

It is what it is. You know what I mean? Just more of that stuff. Humans.

Human beings. So I'd like to do, I've got this little urge, this little scratch that needs itching. And I want to do some pain release sessions.

Which means I'm going to be doing some pain release sessions. But I don't know why I want to do it. Why, oh why, oh why? Do fools fall in love with fools like me? Oh gee, gee, gee.

That's a Madonna song. Sorry about that. Whoops.

I've said this before, but I'm just wondering, do you think it's in a contract? That every Hollywood movie that one of the stars has to, one time during that movie, just once, say the words, my bad. Just once throughout the whole movie. The reason I ask is because practically every movie, unless it's set in the you know, the distant, I don't know, some kind of science fiction film or something set in the 18th century or something.

Every film just once has one of the lead characters saying, or maybe not even the character could be like an extra or someone, but always someone says, oh my bad. Now I've only ever heard one person in my lifetime say that in real life. No one that I know has ever said it to me.

And the one time I heard it, I was on the path walking. It's a good place to walk, usually. But this is broken into a pathway and a cycle path.

Why they did it, I don't know. It's one of the busiest little paths in the town, really busy path. Yet they decided to cut it in half and give half of it to bicycles.

And this kid, I think he nearly hit me with his bike. And he shouted to me, oh, my bad. So this was about six, seven years ago.

Now, if he said, sorry, I said, no, no way, cool. Because he said, my bad, I just, I didn't have a reaction for him. So I ignored him.

I didn't reply, which is possibly rude. I didn't mean, I didn't mean it. Yeah, I wasn't sort of trying to be rude.

I don't need to try. I'm just an expert at it. Yeah.

My bad. And I remember years ago, I looked online to find out what that stupid saying comes from. And apparently it's from baseball, not baseball, from basketball.

It was like a kind of just a way of saying sorry for maybe fouling or banging into someone or something. And then out of nowhere, it started popping up in films. As I said, once.

I don't know if it's just, is it a way of, why? Why? Why? I just noticed things like that. It amazes me sort of, okay, I'm not, I'm not always, I'm not, I'm not as up to date with American politics as I am with the English politics, because I live in England. I just had a phone call then.

That's terrible, isn't it? Just as I was doing this, the phone went. And what's weird is when the phone goes, I put my phone on silent when I make these recordings, because I don't want to be interrupted by the phone. But if I'm expecting a phone call, I leave it on.

So I don't put it on do not disturb, unless I do put it on do not disturb. But at the moment, I'm waiting on a phone call from someone. At some point, I don't know when I'm supposed to be looking after my friend's dog.

Well, it should have been at three o'clock, but it's now nearly, it's 10 past four. So I, I, I, yeah, so I leave my phone on silent. But if it rings, then I can put it on pause and answer, which is something I really do when I'm doing a recording.

In fact, I think that's probably one of the first times, unless I have done it before. But what I didn't realize happens, and this happened the other day, and it threw me right off, is because when the phone rings, even though it's on silent, the iPad rings, because they're connected. But so I thought, oh, that's interesting.

So my phone on silent, the other day, I was in bed. The iPad was, it was during the day, I was having a little nap, you know how I do. A little, a little old, because I'm an old age pensioner now.

You've got to love me. Because I'm old now, you've got to love me. By the way, oh, it reminds me, did you ever watch Why is the ding going? Where's the, all these stupid dings.

Stop it. I don't want dings. I, what was I going to say? The, my phone's dinging.

Every time I get a text message, my phone dings and it's not supposed to. I've got everything on silent on my phone. I don't, the only notification, I've got one notification on there, but not for emails, not for text messages.

So it's a bit strange. But yeah, anyway, I was in bed and the phone was ringing and I'm thinking, I've got it on, I've got it on silent. Why is it ringing? And it was the iPad.

So I answered the phone. Earlier, I think yesterday or the day before, I was sitting at the desk. The phone was on the other side.

It was on the table. Well, two foot away to be fair, but not far. And the phone rings.

And then of course it rings on the, on both, rings on the iPad. So I pressed the button across like I do on the phone to speak on the iPad. And it wouldn't allow me.

It just hung up. So why can't I speak on the iPad? If it's connected to the iPhone, because I can speak on the Alexa. I can say to him, oh God, just shout out Alexa, I can't be quiet.

I could shout Alexa phone someone and it will, because it's connected to the, to the phone. So I can talk to Alexa, to someone on the phone with Alexa. Yeah, I can't, don't seem to be able to do it with the iPad.

Very confused. I'm trying to keep up with technology, I really am, because I know how important it is in this technological world that we live in. Even more so now that money seems to be, or cash money, seems to be dwindling away.

I mean, even my bank, even my bank, because I haven't got a proper credit, credit account, bank account. It's basically just a debit bank account. It's like money goes in there.

And then I'll just draw it out and use it. And it's a very basic account. So it's like the most basic current account you can get.

And the bank phoned me up, I think two weeks ago, or three weeks ago, and they said, yeah, we'd like to upgrade your bank account. They said, first of all, is that, is that just, just or just Jesse Leland? I said, yeah. And they said, like to upgrade your bank account if you want to.

I said, yeah, okay. They said, then you get an overdraft. I said, okay, cool.

Which would be handy, to be fair, not a huge, just start at 50 quid. I wouldn't want a big overdraft because that's, that's another way of getting into debt, isn't it? But just 50 quid would be nice. But anyway, they said, and also you can have a, one of those contact cards, or contact less cards, you can pay with them to put your number into the keypad.

And I thought, yeah, I realized why they're doing it is because that's what's needed right now. They don't want people touching the same keypad, do they? So for the first time, they said, well, we'll send that to you. They didn't say for the first time, we're going to send that to you.

They said, I think this is like a government thing where they're now encouraging people to use contactless, which they were before. But people like me with not the greatest, not the greatest financial history in the past, although I've been quite good these years, but in the past, not so much. And I am very good these days.

I don't have any money, but I'm good because I always pay the bills and bills first, always bills first, bills first. And because there's so many different bills, so obviously gas, electric, water, but then council tax, TV license, and then you've got the telephone, internet, the iPad, and then the catalog. And then there's the other stuff that I don't always need, so I get rid of them when I don't need them, like Netflix.

I've got Netflix at the moment, Amazon, you know, those kinds of things I don't necessarily need, but it's more entertainment. Amazon is really useful if you're going to be ordering stuff from Amazon, because the postage and packing really adds up if you don't have the premium. But at the moment, I'm not ordering anything from Amazon because I can now get deliveries in the supermarket, which I couldn't do for about three months.

So I was getting everything from Amazon, pretty much. And then things like Audible. I listen to the audiobooks.

I do, so education is... I do, I listen to them, like every day nearly, I listen to audiobooks. But I had to cancel that this month. But it's okay, because I can reinstate it.

And I think what I did this time was I froze it, so I didn't cancel it, I just froze it for a month, or paused it for a month. And because I've got about 36 books on there, I don't want to lose all those books. I don't want to, you know, I know technically, if you download them, you're not going to lose them, but I'll lose them if I get a different thing.

If I've got a different phone, I wouldn't then be able to download them. So it's not, I don't want to keep them all, you know, for the future. And then things like iTunes.

All of it, it's just the little things that add up, isn't it? It's like, that's £10 a month. But I got it for three months for £10 or three month trial or something. So for nothing.

So that's why I took it. And then £10 a month, I mean, it's like £2.50 a week. But I do use it, not so much for music, but I listen to the motivational stuff, motivational recordings.

And another one, Blinkist, which I started to listen to, which is, it's like audio, it's their audio books, but it's, it's presented by the author. But it's about the key points of the book. It's a lot of famous books are really like, well, would be classed as maybe important books in their field.

And they're covering the main points. So I got a free trial of that one. So it's just these little bits to add up.

And now boxing's back. I want to be able to watch boxing again. So it's weird.

I think it's strange. I realised this years ago when I worked in a supermarket. That you can have all these items and I'll be looking at this, this is 20 pence, this is 32 pence, this is £1.40, this is 92 pence.

And everything's really cheap. By the end of it, you got a bill of like £120. Like, oh my goodness, or £60 or £45, you know, like a lot more, much higher bill than, than you'd think from the price of each individual item.

And I noticed that when I used to cash up when I was, yeah, I think in a chip shop, I think I used to, I'm sure I used to let me cash up. And you could see it, you have to print off a thing, print off the whole reel of everything that was purchased that day. And the same with pubs as well.

And I think even with the nightclub. And I'm twiddling my finger when I'm doing this, also in retail as well. So I worked in a co-op and in a couple of shops as well.

And it's amazing how long the tour is for each purchase for the evening or for the lunchtime session. Proper long, really like huge. And you look at it and sometimes it's like small amounts of money.

But then it comes to thousands of pounds at the end of it. So yeah, I don't know what the point of that was, but there must have been a point at some point. Pointy, pointy, pointy, pointy, pointy.

So I'm going to go. So have a great weekend. Remember, remember to be kind to yourself.

Because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love. Bye.