#120 Let me bore you to sleep - Jason Newland (30th March 2019)

Hello and welcome to LetMeBoreYouToSleep.com Yes, I've now got a unique website for this podcast. LetMeBoreYouToSleep.com It's still available everywhere else there always has been. All the other podcasts, hosts, Spotify, iTunes and all those places, but it's now got its own little home.

So you can go there and listen, download all of the 119 so far that I've recorded. On the main website, stilljasonnewland.com, that's the hub. The hub sounds like some kind of, I don't know, weird club, some porn empire or something, but it's not.

So yeah, only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes as it may cause drowsiness. If you're watching on YouTube, please subscribe, please like. I've got a bit of a campaign against me on YouTube.

I think I've got people disliking my videos, which is, I kind of think, well, if they are crap, then fair enough. But I get a lot of positive feedback and a lot of a lot of regular listeners on my podcasts. So I don't know, maybe it's just a different audience on YouTube, but I'll continue posting the videos on there.

Because I've also got a few followers on there as well, but it's just, I don't know why it used to, because everything I used to do was mainly on YouTube in the old days, you know. By the way, I've just been drinking Coke and I feel a big burp come in. I'm not going to hold it in, I'm going to let it go.

That's all right, it was, I had a little silencer on the end of it, so that's fine. So it's like a little Hitman burp. So I had a podcast.

I think it was called freepodcast.com. I probably talked about this, but I probably talked about everything in the past, you know, 120 hours of me talking so far on these podcasts. I probably covered everything at least three times. So that was quite a successful podcast for me.

It was the first podcast I ever did, I ever had, and it was on the freepodcast.com, was the host, and it's free. And I had, I think I had about 100,000 downloads on there at the beginning of 2008, and I've been on there for probably about a year or maybe longer. And for some reason, when I was getting thousands every day, thousands of, you know, it's like 3,000 downloads a day or something ridiculous at some point.

And then it just, they didn't ask anybody to pay them money. They had adverts on there at the beginning, which was, you know, they didn't, which was I guess how they financed it. But had they asked for money, I would have paid them to keep the service because it was really good.

It's a really good service. And that was really before YouTube and stuff like that became popular. Long before Facebook, this was what, 2006.

Yeah, onwards. So anyway, I went to check my stats one day, and I had lost about 50% of my audios. They just deleted them.

And I hadn't, I hadn't backed them up because I was making quite a lot of relaxation and chronic pain audios at that time. So I lost a lot of my work. And yeah, this was a little bit annoying.

And then gradually, they stopped doing stats, and gradually they just closed and shut down. So I kind of gave up on podcasts for quite a while after that. But a little bit disillusioned because it was, it was so exciting at the time.

I loved the idea that I was reaching people and, you know, reaching an audience and I was getting feedback and hopefully helping people. And then it was gone. And luckily, I didn't lose all of my sessions because I realised after losing 50%, I better back up the rest, which I did.

And I managed to keep them. So yeah, I kind of didn't bother with podcasts much after that for a few years. In fact, I can't remember the first time I started doing podcasts again.

Yeah, it's probably, probably been about 10 years, or no, not 10 years, probably. I don't know. You know, when you kind of just can't remember something.

That's where I am with this. I can't remember. I know that I've been on YouTube continuously pretty much since it started with a few breaks.

And so I concentrated on videos. And I got a bit of an audience on YouTube. And things are going fairly well there.

So I didn't really bother with the podcasts. And then YouTube went a bit floppy. And for yeah, because I went from being one of the first people to do the kind of stuff that I was doing to being among lots of people doing it.

And, you know, a lot of them were better, better at it, or more slicker, made better videos, maybe were better looking, you know, they made, they were just nicer to look at probably. There was me with my beard. And it's, and maybe they were better, you know, maybe the recording, the videos they made were just better content, maybe, I don't know.

I'm open to that. I mean, I'm not, I'm not proclaiming to be to be the best at anything. But I'm the best that I can be.

I'm the best version of me. I'm not, I hope not. I hope there's more to come.

But then, you know, started getting back into the podcasts. I think, what's it called? What's that? SoundCloud. So SoundCloud is, oh, I'll tell you what happened.

I started listening to a podcast, I saw something about Rickertureface had a podcast with, I can't remember his name, but he's kind of sidekick. Tall blonde glasses. His name will come to me in a minute.

It's really funny as well. But they did this podcast. And it was on Lysync.

They use the Lysync or something is the podcast host. And they, they had, you know, probably millions of listeners and stuff. Apart from the fact, you know, obviously they're famous.

But they think they broke a lot of records with the popularity of the podcast. And I think that had something to do with the podcast kickstarting again. Because they kind of went out of fashion a little bit for quite a while, I think.

Not that they're in fashion, but I think they're more in fashion than they have been previously. And the, so I started looking around, this is probably, what year would that be? 2010? Probably. And then I started 2011.

Keep like searching for pod hosts, podcast hosts. And the problem I had was, I had too many recordings. So some of the record, some of the podcast hosts would be, they had limited, you know, very limited to a certain amount of hours recording per month.

And they'd be charging money. Because I wasn't going to go for any free version anymore. I thought, no, I'm not doing that again.

I'll pay for it. But some of them, although they weren't expensive, they had too many limitations. You know, only 10 hours of audio a month.

And I had like 100 hours already to upload. It's like, okay, what am I going to do there? Probably more than 100. That's hard to tell, but quite a few anyway.

And, let's see, I'll give you an idea. I have, on my Spruika podcast, bear in mind, some are repeated. So it's not going to be this amount exactly.

Because I've got quite a few different podcasts. But this, so let's say Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis sessions will also be on the Sleep Hypnosis podcast. So will the Sleep Let Me Point to Sleep ones.

They'll also be on the Jason Newland Free Hypnosis podcast. So there's a few crossovers. But my Spruika account allows me 1,500 hours of audio to be stored.

And I've got 900, I think, or 980 hours of audio stored on there. So you're probably looking at, yeah, probably 5, 600 hours, possibly, of stuff that I've got. And as I said, there's like the crossovers.

So yeah, probably about 600 probably, if not more, 100 hours of like fresh material, fresh. He's fresh and exciting. He's so exciting to me.

And it's sort of, you know, at the time, I didn't have that much, but I still had a lot of stuff. And some would limit it by the amount of sessions. Some would limit it by the amount of data that was used, you know, by the amount of people that would download or stream.

So the basic plans, some of them were free, some of them were very cheap. But then they went up dramatically in price, some of them. And I have literally, I would say, tried every single podcast host that's available.

And I've paid for every single one of them at some time, tested it out, tried to use it, sometimes found them difficult, sometimes found the uploading of the audios hard, you know, or too slow, or, you know, so I've had lots of issues with lots of different podcast hosts. And also some of them are really good. But they all kind of have their limitations.

But my most, the ones that I kind of just turned into a podcast review, podcast host review, and it wasn't supposed to be. But so I've used SoundCloud now. I've been using it.

Occasionally I have a few months off and I've had a few different accounts, a few different podcasts on there. Probably, I don't know, let's say eight to 10 over the years, maybe less. But it was £8 a month to have unlimited amounts of sessions, unlimited audios and unlimited bandwidth, which is the amount of downloads that people can have.

So it's unlimited, unmetered, but at £8 a month. And it stayed at £8 a month for years and years and years and years. And then recently went up to £10 a month.

But I think they left it at £8 for me, because I've been with them. But because I closed the podcast, I went to reopen it. Maybe two weeks later, maybe it was three or four weeks, I don't know.

Might have even been a couple of months. But they put the price up to £10 a month, which wasn't a huge shock, but I'm just thinking it's like, what percentage is that? 2, 4, 6, 8, 10. That's 20%, isn't it? So I'm thinking maybe they put it up £9 a few years ago, but I didn't know about it because I've been paying £8 continuously.

But yeah, my last podcast, the podcast I've got now is, I think there's just over 50,000 plays on there on the SoundCloud one. And that's got all my stuff on. It's about 900 good recordings.

But the podcast before that, that I got rid of, and then I started a new one. I had over 200,000 plays on that one. And then I've had a few others, as I said, 40,000 or whatever, different time, not 40,000 different times, but various amounts.

So I seem to have a different audience on SoundCloud compared to the audience I have on YouTube. And I seem to have a different audience on Spreaker, because Spreaker is, I would say it's my main podcast host, because it's the one I pay, well, technically it's the one I pay the most for, but it's not now because, well, it still is, yeah, it's still the most I pay for, £50 a month or something. And I've got quite a few different podcasts and I split them up.

So instead of having everything on one podcast, I've reduced it because it's just, it's too much, it's too confusing otherwise. I mean, how are you supposed to find a stop smoking hypnosis course that I did in 2011? Well, no, 2009. If there's 700 recordings after it, things get lost.

So with the iTunes podcast, they only allow the last 250 recordings to show. And I think it's the same with a lot of other podcasts as well, who use the RSS feed from wherever your main podcast is. And so Spreaker is the one that I've shared the RSS feed with the various different podcasts to iTunes and there to iHeartRadio, Spotify, various different places, Podbean.

And a few days ago, I thought, you know what, really, because I have my website, jasonnewland.com, and I'm constantly changing it and using different hosts. And I thought, well, I know that I've got videos on YouTube, but I'm ultimately an audio person. I make audio recordings, that's pretty much what I do.

And I know that I did a lot of videos where I was on camera in the past, but I don't really do that so much now. And so really, my website ought to be a podcast. So I kind of pondered around it and danced around the question mark shaped fire thought and the little song.

And I thought, hmm, my mind went to a different thing. And I started thinking about these recordings, because I've got two popular, well, one very popular podcast, which is the Deep Sleep Whisper hypnosis sessions. That's the most popular podcast I've got.

I'd like to say these are, you know, the ones I'm doing now. But these are the most growing ones, if that makes sense. These are the ones that are growing.

Well, actually, the other one's growing as well. So it's, I don't know, this is hard to explain. But I like this one.

I kind of got a little, I feel in a way, I've kind of created something here. That's not really about, if that makes sense is, it's only really one other person that does like boring podcast. And I'm very different to that person.

Very different. No, I kind of, because after I started doing these, I think about three months ago, I thought, you know what, I'll go and search for myself. So just see how, if I'm kind of being googled, you know, if I'm kind of on there, and I came across someone else, I thought it was me, but it was someone else.

And they've been going for years and years, and very popular, very much, you know, very, very popular. And I thought, oh, so I thought I'd have a little listen. So I wasn't influenced by the person.

I didn't do this because of them, because I'd never heard of it. This is just something that I kind of thought I came up with. But, you know, out of many years of just being really boring, and being around people that bored me.

That sounds terrible, doesn't it? And this is one thing I know, I know boredom. I really, really, really do. I have a doctorate in boredom, and tedium, and that kind of, but also relaxation, and sleepiness, and calmness.

And it's a kind of mixing it all together, you know, gentleness. So mixing it all together into one big sleepy thing. And so I kind of checked out this person, it's American, as I said, it's a popular podcast, and didn't really, wasn't really what I would have thought.

Which is very different to me. It's British, basically, that's his way of doing it, and this is my way of doing it. I suppose the same thing, if it is about, let me bore you to sleep, it's, it technically is exactly the same thing.

As far as the outcome is in the title. Or the required outcome, or the intended outcome. But with these things, it's very much, it's, I guess it's personality based, to a degree.

You know, if you're talking about your life, everybody that does one is going to be different. It's going to be a different person, talking in their own way. And if they're making stuff up, it's gonna, it's gonna be different, because everyone's different, isn't they? I think I explained that.

So, you know, I can't say I'm the only person in the world doing this. But I am one of the only people in the world doing this. You know, there's thousands of people doing ASMR, audios and videos.

Well, maybe not thousands, hundreds. And I'm one of them. So I'm in, there may be thousands, but I don't, I've actually gone through YouTube, and I've counted every single one.

There's not thousands. So there's hundreds, if that. And it sometimes could seem like there's thousands, because each person might have done hundreds of videos.

So there are many, many thousands and thousands of videos out there for ASMR, mainly females, and mainly kind of younger females. But there's, there's still some for men as well. And I would say I probably got my foot in that group, in a sense of, I was kind of doing ASMR before it started, but not realizing it, because I was doing softly spoken recordings, relaxation and sleep, before any ASMR was even heard of on YouTube.

But I didn't know what ASMR was until 2011, when it was like really popular, really became popular. And I thought I'll make, I'll do like a purpose, purposefully whisper stuff, because people asked me to do it. So I started doing that.

But I never got into, I can't do roleplay without laughing. And that's, that's, I can't, I struggle with that. I actually, I've tried to tell stories in some of these recordings, and I started laughing, and I had to stop the recording, because I really go for the absurd.

I love absurdity for some reason. I'm just, it's, I've got very broad humor, it's like things that I find funny. And I can laugh at the most filthy jokes, but also I laugh at the most absurd physical stuff as well.

And, or just the idea of something, you know, tickle me and just, so yeah. It's not that I would put down in my, my dating profile online, I like to laugh, because you know, I don't think it's really a hobby. And I imagine who doesn't like to laugh, it's not, it's not, it's not a special, a special personality quality, I don't think, enjoying laughing.

I love to cut my toenails, now that would be weird. I like breathing. Yes, we all, well, I don't know if we appreciate it, but we all definitely gain the benefits of breathing.

So I got the podcast, Spreaker, they're still up and running, and gaining a momentum, which is nice. And then I thought, ooh, I'm going to get, not only am I going to get a, I'm going to get a website for both of my most popular podcasts, the Let Me Bore You to Sleep, these ones, which is letmeboreyoutosleep.com. And then the Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis podcast, which is deepsleepwhisper.com. And so I've now got those websites that hold my podcast, and it's a Podbean podcast. So it's a completely new podcast, which is also getting listeners from Podbean as well.

So it's, my plan is to just leave it. I'm hoping that it's going to update itself in the RSS feed. If it doesn't, I'll leave it for a few days to see if it eventually uploads, you know, updates itself.

If it doesn't, I'll just have to go and upload the new sessions as I make them. And that's fine. So it's a new source of gaining listeners, I suppose.

So it's just a new, a new place, a new audience. And then I thought, hmm, I've been doing a lot of hmm-ing lately, and I thought, hmm, what about jasonnewland.com? Because I couldn't really afford to keep the website host that I've got, if I was going to have these two extra podcast websites. So I thought, I'll get rid of that, which is 30 quid a month.

And then I'll pay for another podcast host for the jasonnewland.com, and just have all of my stuff. Well, not all of it, but just have the main stuff on there. And just update it.

So those people that just want to go to my main website, and they like all, maybe they like all the stuff I do, or they like to, you know, just go to the hub, I call it the hub, to the home of my work, of all of the stuff, then you can just go to jasonnewland.com. And, you know, the idea is that all of the recordings will be there available, and the newest ones will be there as well. That's kind of the plan on that one. But those that, there's going to be some people that they might only like the Deep Sleep Whisper sessions, or they might only like the Let Me Boy To Sleep sessions.

And then I don't want to be bothered with the other stuff. It's like, what? You say 980 hours? You just want to deal with the ones that you like, maybe. Now you want to just continue to listen on whatever your preferred podcast host is.

But it might be easier just to go to letmeboytosleep.com. It's just up to you. It's all about doing what is easiest. So it's kind of giving you, in a sense, every podcast host, every place where the podcast is, it's just another front door key that I'm handing out.

It's just another way of getting into the house, another way of listening to these recordings, you know, if that makes any sense. So yeah, so it's just a case of trying to, because I've done this thing, but I kind of keep wanting to make changes. But what I need to do, really, is to just leave everything as it is, step back, and just let it roll.

Let it just, because at the moment, if you go on the deepsleepwhisper.com, I think I've got, yeah, 70 recordings on there. I got four plays, or four downloads. And that doesn't, and that's, you know, perhaps I should take the stats off of the website so people can't see, but it looks really bad.

It looks like I've just, you know, but if you go to the actual Spreaker website, and it will show that I've had, like, over 22,000 downloads since November. And, you know, so it's kind of, you know, 22,000 plus, and then there's just four. It's like, oh, this isn't good.

So I just kind of, you know, I mean, perhaps I need to take it off, but there's the benefit if you've got a lot of plays, a lot of downloads, then it looks good. So people come on there and they see, you know, 40,000, 50,000, 150,000, 800,000, a million thousand downloads of a podcast. And chances are they're going to think, oh, this person's good.

Well, I bet they're good. They must be good if they're getting that many. But if they see four, then they might not, might not get the same effect.

Might not be the same, you know. And as it is SoundCloud, the SoundCloud podcast, it's all on its own. I keep thinking I should get rid of it, but, I don't know, I just, I kind of like it, because it's one of the first ones I ever had, and I just want to keep it for some reason.

It's my little boy. It's my little, my little podcast, you know, my little child. So I wish I still had the original one on SoundCloud, because I'd have a lot of listeners on there now.

But it's not all about the stats, but it can be. If you're not making any money out of something, then the stats become, you know, more important, I guess, more interesting. Because maybe, like, partly for ego reasons, but just to know that it's just not wasted time, you know.

It's a bit like when you get a toilet fixed, and you keep flushing it. You know, maybe you've had to wait six days before the plumber could get there to fix the toilet. Or maybe, you know, you've got a landlord, or, you know, you couldn't do it yourself, so you had to wait for someone to come.

And finally, the toilet, you know, you've been having to chuck water from a bucket down a toilet for it to, like, flush away. And now you can use the flusher, the magic little flusher, that button, that little pedal, that little bit of metal, or plastic, or wood. I don't know, it shouldn't be wood, I don't think, anymore.

Or diamonds, you know, depends where you live. And it flushes. And you want to flush it again, but you can't, because it hasn't filled with water yet.

And you're waiting. You can, like, flush it a little bit, but just a tiny little bit of water comes out, but you still feel good, because you can now flush it. So that's what it's like for me, really.

Checking my stats is just a bit like getting a toilet cleaned, getting a plumber in. Being able to flush my toilet every day, or go on to the stats, just to see how things are going. Usually more than once a day, if I'm honest.

And a good day, be a thousand plus downloads. And it's growing from there, but anything less than a thousand, sometimes, if I don't upload a new recording, I might get less than a thousand downloads. So it's a case of keep producing new recordings, so that that level gets to the point where maybe in a few months time, if I don't produce any new recordings, I'll get 2,000 downloads.

So in order to get above 2,000, I'll have to upload something. You know, I think that makes sense to me. But another thing, hopefully you're not really listening anymore, because I've bored you, and that's the point, but I would like to say thank you to everybody that does listen to these, because in a really, really strange way, I can't really explain it, but in a really deep, deep way, this gives me my life meaning.

So, you know, doing these helps me. And I'll be honest, I think even if it stayed at a thousand downloads a day, and it never got to the 100,000 a day that I needed to get to, in order for me to sort of maybe earn a living out of this, I'd still do it. I'd still do it for the next 30 years, until I can, I'd still do it, as long as I can talk, I'll do it.

If I lost my voice, I'd use a computer and use a, you know, a voice thing like Stephen Hawking's or something like that, or write books, you know, I'll find a way around it. I'll find a way to bore you, and so I'll always find ways to bore people. There's this person in, I don't know what country he's from, it's not really relevant, but he's, I think he's really famous in that country.

It might be Germany or Austria, something like that. He's got blonde hair, not again, that's relevant just because he's from Germany, it doesn't mean he's got blonde hair. Try and get rid of those stereotypes.

I can't forget his name, but what he does is he just looks at people. He stands, and there's an audience watching him, he just stands on a stage and just looks at the audience, and they look at him, they look into his eyes, and they kind of get a sense of relaxation, a sense of healing, a sense of calmness, a sense of being fixed, maybe, if that's what they need, a sense of replenished energy, but you don't like the healing thing going on. And if I lost my voice, I might give that a go, just go around staring at people.

I'd do that anyway, but it'd be good to get paid for it, just look at people. I like to think that maybe my voice can do that for some people in some way. Just, did you hear that? That was my big toe on my left foot cracking.

That's just the gas, isn't it? The gas between the bones, I think. I need to have a drink before I cough. All my battery's getting low on this, so I'm going to finish soon, so I'm not going to have a long recording because I've got 18% left on the battery.

But, what is the time? It's 3.01 in the morning. So I just, yeah, I wanted to just say thank you. I mean, hopefully no one's hearing this anyway, but if you are hearing it, I mean it, genuinely, genuinely mean it.

I can't always do these recordings, I'm not always in the right space to do it. So it, I don't know, we're not all built to do everything that everyone else does. We've all got our own kind of, you know, some people are built physically strong, they're kind of just born like that, and, or very, some people are built, just have a really good mathematical brain.

Or very good at technical stuff, like my dad, he's brilliant at anything to do with building or electrics or, you know, anything joinery, plastering, plumbing, he could do anything, you know, and, okay, I'm laughing before I even say it, he could make a canoe out of a whale's backside. I don't know exactly, it's a weird, weird thing, but he's, you know, he's very, very, he's very good at that stuff. Now, I ask my neighbor for help when I change a light bulb.

So, you know, we've all got our things that we are good at, or that we, I don't know if it's necessarily about being good even, it's about, you know, I think in order to be competent at something, we need to be able to feel relaxed and confident in what we're doing, if this makes sense. But, you know, I've known lots of people, and admittedly, some people are really confident and particularly bad at what they do. So, I realize that, you know, there's plenty of, yeah, there are quite a few people like that, but the people that stands out, the people that are really good at what they do, a lot of times they really feel confident or, and they put a lot of work into it.

They devote their time to it, think about it. I think that's the thing with David Beckham. I'm not comparing myself to David Beckham, of course, but he, what he did, although he's a model, and he's a, he's an icon, sports icon, and he's probably one of the most famous footballers of all time, you know, just because he became bigger than football in some ways to a lot of people, and he's known all around the world.

And, but the thing that he did, and the only thing that he did from a child onwards, was focus on playing football, practice kicking the ball from different parts of the pitch to get it into the goal, you know, the whole thing, you know, bend it like Beckham, that his special kick that he could do, his special goal scoring kick, he practiced that right the way up, you know, I'm not sure when he stopped practicing. He probably still practice, probably still does it now. I imagine he's never going to lose the love of football.

He probably plays football with his children. In fact, he might still be playing football now, I don't know. I really don't know, I'll lose track.

But he focused everything on that before he was a model, before he was doing adverts and making money and in other things. He, you know, everything, his life was based around kicking that ball, getting it in the net. I've got a lot of admiration for people that can do that, that are able to give their time and energy solely to kind of one thing.

I know it's not possible, but probably most people, you know, it's not realistic for most people. And it's probably maybe not even that healthy in some ways, depending on what it is. But I like the idea, I kind of like the idea of being able to do what comes naturally and find a way to earn a living out of it.

A nice, comfortable living, but at the same time, you know, be kind of healthy and happy and, you know, just be, that's it. And I might have found it with these, because I can just be my boring self. My normal speaking voice is this, this is, I'm probably a little bit louder at times, to be fair, but, you know, I'm not a loud speaker, I'm not a quick speaker.

I do, I prefer just to talk at people. I've talked about this before, it's true, I do. You know, I get stimulated by, in a conversation with another person, what they say stimulates me to want to say the next thing, and I end up sort of sometimes talking over them.

And I acknowledge it when it happens, but it's not because, I don't know, it's not necessarily that I want to hear my own voice, because I'm not really that bothered about hearing me speak, although I like talking sometimes. But it's because I want to hear what the person's got to say next, but I don't want to sit there for 10 minutes listening to them go into too much detail. It's like, I've already heard enough of that, now tell me more about that.

But there, I get pulled up on this sometimes, and, you know, we're talking about trips to America, and this person might say, well, I went to America once, I went to New York with my girlfriend, and I'll say, I'd love to go to New York, because there's loads of comedy clubs there, and it's really, and then I want to talk about comedy clubs in New York, but they can't contribute to that, because they perhaps didn't go to any comedy clubs in New York, but now that's what I want to talk about.

So I kind of, I do want to talk about New York, so do they, but I'm very specific, I don't want to hear about the park, I don't want to hear about, you know, what they had to eat, or what hotels they stayed in, I want to just talk about the comedy clubs. In that moment, I mean, it doesn't mean that's all I'll ever want to talk about, but, and I kind of get sidetracked, and then I want to, perhaps want to talk about my own experiences in comedy clubs, because that was a big love of mine for many years, still is really, but I don't get to, don't get to really go to any comedy clubs these days, but I used to love comedy clubs, my favourite places, gay bars as well, I liked them, I used to.

I like the, I like the atmosphere, and you know what, I could go out, this is the difference between going into a straight club, like a just a general nightclub, and a gay club.

The gay club, the whole time I felt relaxed, and I never once left a gay club feeling lonely, or being disappointed that I hadn't met anyone, or disappointed that I wasn't going home with anyone, and I had that feeling many times, in like normal, or not normal, but in the general clubs, and the reason for that is because when I was leaving the gay clubs, I was going home with someone, no I wasn't, and it's because it wasn't about that, it wasn't about, that was loud wasn't it, sorry, it wasn't about, it's just different, it

was just about relaxing, and maybe dancing, and even talking to the women, because you know there's men and women in there, just talking to the women could be just on a normal level of like, hi, how you doing, right, without any, you know, pretense, or make-belief, or pretending to be something I'm not, like a good catch, or an ideal boyfriend, you know, just, so it was, I don't know, I used to like, like going to gay clubs, used to go with my friend Andre, that's who Andre, my boy Andre is named after, and neither of

us were gay, but we both went in there, and he was such a flirt, Andre was, he was a really good-looking person, man, you know, if you went into like a standard nightclub, he'd have the women queuing up for him, for some reason, and women loved him, and he was, he was a handsome man, but smelly feet, proper, I lived with him as well, and he had a proper smelliest, smelliest feet, he had to leave his shoes outside in the garden, seriously, but we used to go into this gay club, which was, it wasn't far

from where we lived, so it was easy to get to, and they were open later as well, for some reason, and he'd just be chatting, well, no, he wouldn't, he'd be letting the barman, I think he was actually the owner of the club, chat him up all night, all night long, because he got free drinks, he just used to sit there, and smile, and laugh, and I used to say he's pretending to think, but he just like, just went along, and it's just, now that's a flirt, and it's wrong, but I got a few free

drinks as well, so it's not too bad, but I'm like Andre, I had to pay for mine.

Yeah, I did, another time, I had another friend who used to go into a gay club with him, and again, he was, as far as I know, he wasn't gay, he might have been, I don't think he was, but he used to really flirt with, to get free drinks, it's very, it's like, because I remember we went upstairs, because it was the owner of the bar, we both went upstairs, and those were the days where I was, really didn't know about all that stuff, I was only, what, 17, I wasn't, I wasn't the most worldly

person at that age, still not really, but I'm quite, Englandy, if you know what I mean, I've kind of been around a little bit in this country, but I have not really been around much worldwide, been to a couple of countries, went to Bulgaria once, well not once, well yeah, it was once, but I stayed there for a few days, and came back eventually, and went to France once, went to Belgium twice, and I went to Ireland twice, yeah, I've been to the Isle of Man, I've been to Spain, so yes, that's seven, and England,

so it said, well, okay, seven countries outside, or seven, Andre, and, oh, that smells like your, smells like the original Andre socks, oh, so, oh, it's time to finish, it's, I didn't realise we're an hour in, I like to keep things to an hour, if at all possible, hopefully by now you're bored, bored your socks off, and you're just sleepy, it's a good thing is, that no matter what I talk about, it's the voice, it's a trigger, it triggers you to sleep, because you get used to it, you get used, it's like, that's why we

have, that's why we have beds, that's why we have a bedroom, that's why we have a specific place to sleep, because your mind knows that's what is going to happen next, gets ready, prepares itself, as soon as you go through your routine, before we go to bed, your mind starts to prepare, I don't know if you find this, but sometimes I'll feel a bit tired, I'll go to bed now, but by the time I've cleaned my teeth, took my hairpiece off, hung it up, got my makeup off, just general stuff, and then I sit on

my bed, and I take my socks off one at a time, mind you I've taken my socks off one at a time, isn't an age thing, it's always been the same, never once I think did I ever take them both off at the same time, but I might have done, but I take them off one at a time, give a little grunt, like that, and then I roll them into a ball, so one inside the other, drop them on the, I've got a new routine now, I used to put it at the bottom of the

bed, now, this is why I mean by boring, because that's one of the most boring things anyone can ever say to you, I used to roll my socks up into a ball and put them at the bottom of the bed, now I put them to the side of the bed, near my bottled water, I put the waters in the bottle, and I leave my slippers at the side of the bed, turn the light off, sometimes I turn the light off first, but then I think why make things difficult for myself, it's much easier to see

when the light's on, the light switch is only just there, it's not like I've got to walk to the other side of the room, so I just usually leave the light on until I'm ready to, like lay down on my bed, so I turn the light off, lay down on my bed, and by that time, at the point where I'm taking these socks off, I'm actually feeling more and more tired, you know, that walk from the bathroom to my bedroom, and it's not a long way, you know, there's no taxi involved, it's just a short

walk, and I just feel whatever energy I've got just dripping out of my toes, as I'm walking towards the bed, you know, and I feel the relief of just sitting down on the edge of the bed, and then just getting the socks off, and then feeling the air on my feet and my toes, just feels nice, and then I can just lay down, I personally lay down on my left side, sometimes I lay down on my back for a bit, it depends, after I've turned the light off, otherwise I will get back up and turn

the light off, and just, you know, just laying down, my head touches the pillow, my body does get heavy, and my mind does start to just kind of empty, so it's a nice feeling, I sometimes actually sit here, and I'll be doing something on the computer, and I'll think, I want to get this finished first before I go to bed, although some would say, ideally, don't do stuff like that directly before going to sleep, maybe do something that doesn't involve computer screen on stuff, but it's whatever you feel suits you, really, I guess, and I'll

just be visualizing myself laying down on my bed, drifting off, oh, it feels so nice.

So, sweet dreams, and I'll speak to you again tomorrow, I'll make another one of these, Let Me Boy To Sleep, which is on LetMeBoyToSleep.com, bye.