#112 Let me bore you to sleep - Jason Newland (12th March 2019)

Hello and welcome to Jason Newland dot com. My name is Jason Newland. This is Let Me Bore You to Sleep.

Please only listen to this when you can safely close your eyeballs. And if you're watching on YouTube, please only watch when you can safely close your eyes. And please subscribe.

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Even if you just donate $10,000 each, it'll help towards the yacht. So that'll be really good, thanks. So, I thought what I'll do is something that I don't normally do, because, well there's a reason why I don't normally do it.

It's because I don't normally do what I did today, which gives me the opportunity to talk about what I did today, because normally I don't generally do what I did. Although I didn't do that much, but I did do something. So, I actually went out.

By going out, I don't mean I went out clubbing or, you know, didn't dress up and, you know, in town, I didn't see him today, but there's a bloke and he's dressed grey, all in grey, like a metal man, which I guess that's what he's supposed to be. And I was thinking that's got to be quite boring, because you can't really break character, can you? What do you do when you need to go to the toilet? Because there are public toilets, there's one, yeah, one that I know of, public toilets, but can you imagine if you're in a public toilet and you come out and this is bloke, completely grey, like every part of him, including his, what his clothes are, his skin, everything, that would be freaky, wouldn't it?

Oh God, do you imagine someone saying, that's prejudice, you're being racist against people made of metal. He isn't really made of metal, but he's made out to look like he is.

I would have preferred if, I don't know, when I think of a metal man, I think of The Wizard of Oz, The Wizard of Oz, I love that film. By the way, if you ever get a chance, there's a film called The Wiz, that you might not know about, and it's got all that Motown styles of the 80s or 70s and 80s in it, it's like everyone, I think Stevie Wonder, Michael Jackson, Aretha Franklin, Diana Ross, I'm making some of them names up, well I'm not making the names up because they do exist, but it's a lot of really famous people in that film.

It's really good, it's a really, really good, it's not so much a good, it's not so much that it's a good film, but the music's really good.

And there's one bit where Michael Jackson is, he's a scarecrow, and he's on a, like a post, you know, and he's surrounded by crows, but they're not crows, they're people dressed as crows, and there's this whole singing bit, and it's like newspapers, I think it might be because he had newspapers inside him, because they do, sometimes the scarecrows, they're made of, yeah, sometimes for their innards, they have old newspapers, don't they? Yeah, I forgot about that, and yeah, so, but this is really good, because he sings this song, and it's a really good song, I forget what it is, I'm not really promoting it very well, but it doesn't matter, because if you do watch it, he's not going to get any royalties, is he?

But it's a really good song, and Andre decided to run around now, seriously, I did a recording about an hour and a half ago, and he was running around, as soon as I finished, he went to sleep, and right now, as I started talking, he's out and out about again, why, why, he'll be climbing up on me in a minute, why can't he just behave?

Mind you, it's time for his bed, really, he'll be going to bed soon, when I finish this, I'll put him in his bed, oh look, as soon as he heard me say bed, he's run into his bag, he doesn't want to go to bed, he wants to stay up, because even though he's asleep, he can do what he wants, I want to put him to bed, I put him in his cage, and he can't, he doesn't have the freedom for seven hours, or eight hours, or whatever it is, that he's in there, while I'm in bed, he's like, daddy, I'm in, I'm in, look, look, I'm in the bag now, I promise I'll behave, don't put me to bed, I'll put you to sleep.

So, it's worth checking out the Wiz, if you just put in, let's say to YouTube, I would say other video, other video websites are available, but which other ones?

So, if you go into YouTube, and you click in, put in Michael Jackson, The Wiz, Scarecrow Sing, and that'll probably bring it up, and you'll see a picture of him, looks like he's kind of on a cross, to be fair, but he is on this, you know, he's kind of tied up onto this thing, it's a really good song, really, really, really good song, and I like it a lot, I really do, watched it many times, so, because last week, on Wednesday, I think it was, my psychiatrist said about, I should go out, I should,

you know, make an effort and try and go out every day, which is what I did, to be fair, I didn't do it Thursday, but I did go out Friday, I did go out Saturday, didn't go out Sunday, which was yesterday, although technically, it might now be Tuesday, because it's kind of, I don't know what time it is, oh, it is, it's half past one, no, half past midnight on Tuesday, so, yes, it's now Tuesday, so I'm talking about yesterday now, so I got up, and I thought, you know, I'm gonna make the effort, and

I had a bath, I had something to eat, and then I went out, yeah, I didn't even have a cup of coffee, so, for ages, you know, I can't remember the last time that I didn't have a cup of coffee with my breakfast, I mean, admittedly, I don't keep track of it, I don't have a log that I fill in, you know, every day, cup of coffee, tick, yawn for a few seconds at the beginning of every recording, tick, bone about Andre, tick, oh, I'm yawning now, tick, another tick, but I, you know, in some

ways, I seem to feel a bit more, I feel a bit tired when I've had a cup of coffee, it's supposed to be the opposite, isn't it, but I had some juice, and I got this juice, it was two weeks ago, two weeks ago, two weeks, two weeks, two weeks, maybe three weeks, three, two, three, no, I think it was three weeks ago, nearly, three weeks on Wednesday, and I got about five of these juices, but they last for quite a while, so I don't have to drink them all straight away, I'm now down to

the last two, so some of it was, like, mixed, I like, I like, I like orange, but I prefer, like, more mango or mixed fruit, you're like, what do they call it when you put mixed, maybe apples, oranges, oranges, citrus, but not, if you know what I mean, it's like, it's not too citrusy, and maybe some grapefruit, but, I mean, grapefruit is, it's nice, but it's, it's a bit, you know, no, I can't really drink that stuff, to me, it's like drinking a shot, it's just like that, a bit without the alcohol effect, not that

I really drink, I haven't had alcohol for absolutely ages, I can't remember the last time, I think the last time I bought four cans of lager would have been at the garage, I reckon, because I don't like to carry things far, it's one of those rules I've got, it's on my list, it's, it's not in the top 10, to be fair, but it's just on there, you know, try not to carry things far, don't do things, don't, you know, don't do things that cause pain for yourself, if at all possible, whatever rules I've got, I

try and live by, oh yeah, this is a new one, never get another ferret, that's my rule, he's on my, he's not even speaking now, he's on my lap now, as we speak, sniffing me balls again, which is weird behaviour, and he's all wet, so he's been, he's basically on heat, unless he's been drinking, you've been drinking, no, you're wet, that's not, not from his beard, because he's, otherwise he'd have water all over his mouth, you're my little baby, aren't you, yes you are, I love you, yes I do, yes I do, I'm kissing him,

by the way, I'm not just blowing kisses at you, in case you get upset over kisses, whoever's listening to this, it's not, I'm blowing kisses to my boy Andre, Andre Dooley Newland, yes, he's got a runny nose as well, so I don't know what that's about, he was sneezing at the weekend, but he stopped, he stopped now, but I have to be careful, because constantly he's kissing me and stuff, but we can catch stuff from each other, like cold, so if I, if I had a cold, I could give it to him, and if he

had a cold, he could give it to me, so I have to make sure that I kind of, still give kisses, but just make sure that you keep my distance a little bit, if, if one of us is sneezing, I'm just scratching his neck, and he's just laying here, so he seems to be happy, um, oh yeah, don't get another ferret, that's, that was my, isn't it weird I said that, and he just jumped on me, but daddy, I'm a bit, I still love you mate, I just don't want another one of you, hear that,

he sneezed then, I'll try to explain that to people I've lived with, I've never, not lived with, as in sharing a bed, but people that have like, have had a room in a house, and I've rented a room in that house as well, I've lived in about 40 odd of those different places since I left school, and I, I said to one place, I said look, I like you, I just wouldn't want to live with you, and she said, but you are living with me, I said oh yeah, yeah, but you know, I don't, you

know, I just don't want to live, I could live with someone that I loved, but I couldn't go back to, I would never want to go back to living in a house where other people lived, I still, that would just be, for me, that's, that's just not really my thing, so I realise if I'm lucky enough to get old, be an old age pensioner, and be in my 90s, I might end up living in a, you know, old people's home, residential home, whatever you want to call it, being looked after by robots, wow, can you

imagine that, apparently that already now, some places they've got robots that are looking after elderly people, and keeping them company, yeah, I prefer to have a ferret, I would have a little, but I want Andre, I want to grow old with Andre, I want him to be with me for the next 30 or 40 years, but I know realistically it's possibly not going to happen, I want you to be around forever, I do, because I love you so much, even though I do moan don't I, go on, go and play, go and make some noise,

yeah, it's going to scratch out the front door now probably, little bugger, so yeah, what was it, oh yeah, I bought some lagers, I bought four, this is absolutely ages ago, I think I had one, and that was Stella, Stella Artois is the name of the lager, and I just ended up giving, what's he doing now, I ended up giving three cans away to my friend, so I didn't even drink the whole of one, I drank about three quarters and that was enough, didn't like it, it's not even a case of not liking a taste,

because you know what, I'll be honest, in the past when I've gone a little while without drinking, I've loved the taste, I didn't like the taste when I was younger, but you know, as an adult, let's say, you know, a few years back, if I went, maybe I couldn't afford to drink anything for a few days, when I did have that drink, it was like, oh it's beautiful, that was so nice, really just tasty, so yes, it's not a case of the taste, it's, don't do nothing for me anymore, oh why, it's not, I'm not

upset about it, you know, I'm not holding in tears, but it's weird, I used to rely on it for so much, you know, for years and years and years of working, and all through between 2000 and 2014, 2015, I was drinking alcohol regularly, less so after 2014, but before that, it was like, you know, when I was working, it was pretty much like every night, just to kind of get myself through, which isn't, not a very good idea really, but now I don't, it's like, oh what am I going to do now?

I do drink coke still, but that's coming to a, that's coming to a close, I'm going to wind down the coke over the next few months, just gradually decrease, there's no hurry, I'm just going to gradually decrease and gradually go to the gym, gradually.

I did get a bottle of vodka, no I didn't get it, my friend got a bottle of vodka and we had, I must have had probably maybe a quarter of it, and I wasn't drunk, it doesn't, I don't really get drunk, unless I drink a lot, if that makes sense, the only times I ever really, really get drunk is at weddings, never been to a wedding where I didn't get drunk, ever, I don't think, it's just compulsory, it's just, there's all that free alcohol, I like weddings for that, I don't like all the, the bit

I like is the food bit, you know, all the rest I can kind of do without, I'd like to skip through that bit, you know, the whole ceremonial stuff, I think my idea, what would my ideal wedding be, I think my ideal wedding would be, yeah, I think my ideal wedding would be, if I had to do the, I don't know, wait a minute, would I want to do a big wedding celebration, probably not, because I don't have hardly any friends, so I wouldn't, it wouldn't be, I don't want to be at a wedding where

everybody there is like from my wife's family, that would be a bit weird, it depends who I got married to, and I suppose if it was planned, I'd have some of my family, who would I have, I'd have my brothers, my sister, dad, parents, who else, my cousin, maybe my auntie, that's it, there's maybe six or seven people, a couple of friends in London, another couple of friends, three, one, two, three, four, five, yeah, so maybe another 10 people added on, so, you know, looking at maybe 15, maybe 20 people max to come to my

wedding, some of those I haven't seen for ages, ages, I think it's different, I've got a cousin, and I haven't seen her for years, and also, because I unfriended her on Facebook, because, you know, I need to just remind everyone, Facebook is a website, it's not real, no, just in case you thought it was, it's not, it's just a website, and I unfriended all my family and friends, because I keep Facebook specifically to promote the free stuff, you know, the online videos and audio recordings, podcasts and stuff that I do, and so I've kept all

of my family and friends off of there, but in the past, I've had them on there, and they've added me, and I've took them off, and sometimes they get a bit annoyed, and it's like, it's not real life, you know, I've blocked friends, I've blocked people that I know in real life, it's like, you know, you've got my telephone number, you can call me if you want to talk to me, I'm not conversing with you on Facebook, so that's why I kind of, it's different if someone's in another country, because Facebook's brilliant for that, because

you can talk to them for free, and there was a point to what I was saying, I've got no idea what it was, what was the point, JJ?

Yeah, the point was, oh, weddings, I think I'd quite like the idea of having a wedding, where, yeah, I know, having a wedding, I don't know, because there's a little bit of an old-fashioned part of me, see, I'm not so much a new man, but I'm fairly open-minded, and I try to get rid of as many limitations as possible, and it's an ongoing thing, it's, but I don't, you know, it's like limited beliefs, and things should be this way, and things like, wait a minute, it's, as I said, it's ongoing, it's, I'm never going to

be finished with the process, but it's, it's always work to do, oh yeah, but I just, because if I got married, it would be to a woman, and I'd like it to be special for her, to be about her, very much the opposite to going to the movies, because if I go to see a film, I want to watch a film that I want to watch, and if I'm watching television, I want to watch what I want to watch, and if I'm eating, getting a takeout, I want to eat what I may want to eat,

so I'm not very flexible in some ways, and I need to, need to grow as a person, I will do one day, but I think for the wedding, I think one day, if you're going to spend, let's say 10 years together, well, might as well, might as well have one day of happiness, don't you think?

I just don't fancy the idea of this big wedding, apart from the financial aspect of it, which we, yeah, I'm not thinking about that, I just don't, the idea of having loads of people, it's like, why, why would I want loads of people there? A little table in a restaurant maybe, or maybe book out a restaurant, but a little restaurant, a little coffee shop, and then get married, and have dinner, like straight away, no speeches, no waiting around, so it'd be dinner at one o'clock, go in, do you want to marry her? Yeah, do you want to marry him?

Yeah, you're married, right, let's eat, and that's it, that's stuffing, it's quite a nice way to do it, or, because I like boxing, I think what would be quite cool is, if I was famous, like, you know, I think what I would do is, maybe at the end of a world title fight, organize it so that I'm watching the fight with her, we're at the ring side, and then I go into the ring, I go inside the ring, and give her a ring, but to ask her to marry me, or have the marriage ceremony there,

and get George Foreman, who's also a priest, to do it, and he could marry me, me and, what's her name, whoever it is, yeah, I could get married, I could get married by George Foreman, maybe do it in Atlanta, or was it at Caesar's Palace?

See, that excites me, that would be so cool, and my best man I could have, who could I have as my best man? Okay, who's my first, yeah, I could have Tyson Fury as my best man, or Anthony Joshua, I could have them as my brides, brides, brooms, brides, bro, um, groomsmen, groomsmen, yeah, I've had Anthony Joshua, yeah, Anthony Joshua, Anthony Joshua, Wilder, and, uh, Tyson Fury, and also have Lennox Lewis there as well, and Frank Bruno, just basically just introduce all the boxers, just, uh, invite all the boxers that I like, that'd be so cool, it might not be the ideal wedding for her, but really, it's about me though, isn't it?

Isn't it more, more important that I'm happy?

After all this, this is my podcast, I, um, I wonder why he's back, he's just been in, in the bedroom making love, keeps going looking at the radiator for some reason, I don't know why, oh, he's gone off again, he's acting very strange, so I, I quite like, you know, people's going about, at the moment, we've got this thing in England called Brexit, it's like a big political thing, and I know that other countries, it's just standard, isn't it, we get focused on our own political stuff, and perhaps forget that the rest of the world

ain't that interested, they're interested in their own country, you know, they're interested in their own prime minister or president, you know, there isn't just one president of the world, there's lots of different presidents and prime ministers and kings and queens and stuff, and in England, they've got this big thing, or Britain, got this big thing with Brexit, leaving the European Union, anyway, I'm going to go into that, because that's a very unpleasant topic, really, but it's, I'm trying to, how can I supposed to focus on all this interesting stuff I'm saying, God, he's let off

a pulm as well, seriously, oh, he's just had, it's like he's had a drink of water, he's aimed his bum at me, he let off a massive fart, and then ran off into his bag, so he doesn't have to smell it, and just left me in the room with it, that's just rude, oh yeah, so with this Brexit thing, there's been a lot of like, people's personal prejudices have come out a little bit over the years, and I've got a thing for Eastern European girls, or ladies, I do, I have, when I went to Bulgaria,

I was just astonished, astonished, and when I was in London, I worked with a lot of, a lot of girls, well, I should say women, a lot of women from various different places, Russia, what's the other place, not Bulgaria, Bulgaria, what's the place that Germany, Germany moved into, Poland, yeah, Polish, I worked with a lot of Polish people, like men and women, and also Russian, Croatian, Yugoslavian, Hungarian, and other people from various different parts of Europe, and I liked them, when I was at this club, okay, there was a new waitress, there's always new staff

coming and going, you know, people at college, university, people here on holiday, you know, whatever, lots of staff coming and going, and waitresses, and waiters, and bar staff, kitchen staff, well, I got talking to this Russian girl, Russian woman, and she's, oh, she was lovely, and I got talking to her, and I was, I suppose I was trying to chat her up, but I was just, not, not cheesy, just sort of saying hello to her, and, you know, what's your, you know, where are you from, and, you know, that kind of stuff, and there was

laughter coming from the kitchen, because there was this cubbyhole you could see, like a service hatch, you could see the staff in the kitchen were laughing, including a chef, and like, why are you laughing, and I noticed there was one person in the kitchen that wasn't laughing, big tall man, well, it turned out that that was her husband, and they were basically here on holiday, they just decided to come to Russia for six months, and took on some menial jobs, and they were both professionals, I'm not sure what she did, but he was a psychiatrist

in Russia, so he was the very, you know, he's a medical doctor, and he was doing washing up, just to keep, you know, to give him enough money to keep going, while he sort of traveled around, and got to meet, got to see the country, and maybe the rest of Europe, and it was embarrassing, but we ended up being friends, like I ended up being good friends with her, and good friends with him, and I still fancied her, which is weird, you know, just that doesn't stop, does it, you can't, it's just, it's just natural

attraction, but I got really well with him, probably better with him than with her, friends wise, which is weird, because I'd be, at the end of the evening, he'd come and spend time with me, and we'd have a drink and stuff, and we'd be talking while the music was on, and he felt so comfortable, he'd start talking in Russian, he'd forget I was in, he'd forget that I was English, and it's like, I took that as a compliment, that if, that he felt comfortable enough with me, that he must have liked me, and he did,

they wanted me to go and visit, when they moved away, and I had, they left my address, they left his address, and I think they sent a letter to me from Russia, they wanted me to go and visit, and, but I never did, kind of wish I did now, it would have been cool, because they were lovely, a really lovely couple, she got pregnant while she was here, and then she, they went back to Russia to have the baby there, didn't have the baby here, so they didn't, they had no intention of staying here, they

just wanted to, to visit, they wanted to go back to their homeland, to their homeland, they wanted to go back to where, you know, because he was a psychiatrist, he would have had a good lifestyle, it's quite, from what I understand, and I got no idea what she did, I mean she was, she was quite young, I think he was probably in his thirties, but she was in her twenties, and I was probably, I was probably older than her, so I was, I was probably about 28, 29, she would have been probably 24, I'd say,

I still remember her, so I can remember, I can visualize her now, she's, she's very short, I'm shorter than me, which means anyone that's shorter than me is short, because I'm quite short, and she was lovely, can't remember her name, but she, she had a friend that worked there as well, or was it, she might have been Polish, I don't know, there's quite a few different nationalities, I didn't really take much notice of it, although I did learn a bit of Polish, because I was friends with the, the men that worked in the kitchen, so

they started trying to teach me different, like words and stuff, you know, put them, swear words to start with, but it was a lot of, I forget now, is it da, is yes, and what that thing is, when I went to Bulgaria, I didn't know, you might not know this as well, yes means no, and no means yes in Bulgaria, which is quite a confusing way to be, isn't it, so if someone nods their head, the way we, the way we do, you might be in Bulgaria now, so clearly you can wave your head, whatever

way you wave your head.

Andre's just running around frantically, why?

He's basically rubbing himself against everything, so I've got these dumbbells, right, and they're on the floor, they're getting heavier every week, because he's rubbing himself against them and leaving whatever he's leaving on them, I'm scared they're going to get pregnant, seriously, these little half ferret, half dumbbells running around, when I was in, when I was in Bulgaria, oh dear, I got off the plane, I got off, yeah, got off the plane, got onto a coach, it was at night, got to the hotel, yeah, Bulgaria is a beautiful country, that's the thing, I'd probably say that

every country has beauty, but you know, Europe, every European country is beautiful, you know, I'm sure there's parts that aren't, obviously, the parts that have been wrecked by conflict and stuff, so Bulgaria, I didn't get to see it properly coming in, because it was dark, but when I left, when we left the hotel, if you know for good, and went, made our way back to the airport, we got to see the surrounding areas and the blocks of flats where people lived and looked a lot different, because, you know, because at the time where we were

on the mountain, where the hotel was, because it was a snow resort, I'd like to go back there, I would just, I don't know, you know, sometimes it'd be nice to revisit something, go back to the exact hotel and just chill out there, I would not go onto the slopes, go nowhere near the snow, I'd just hang out in the hotel, go for walks and just maybe, you know, make friends with some of the people that are working there and just say, could you show me around the real life, you know, the real places where

people live and stuff, and I hope he doesn't disturb the neighbour downstairs, him running around all the time, because that's quite noisy, isn't it, I reckon it's, because I'm awake late anyway, every night, but imagine, well it's quarter past one, and the person downstairs trying to sleep and all she's got is oh, he's in the bag now, I think he's like, I think he must have been a security guard in his last life, and he's used to going on patrol, you know, has to go to different checkpoints, just check the area, so that's what he

does, he runs around, goes near the radiator, goes into the kitchen, goes into the bathroom, goes to the front door, goes into the bedroom, checks everything and then goes back into the bag, it's like, Andre, you're not getting paid for this, not even minimum wage, so in Bulgaria, I get to the hotel, the very first night, and I was just relieved to get there, you know, been a long day travelling, and it's just nice to get there, and there was this lady on the reception, and she was really nice, and I was chatting her up,

I suppose, don't forget it's a long time ago, you know, it's about 2003, so I was only young, a youngster back then, I was allowed to talk to ladies then, and I got talking to her, and saying, oh, so, you know, what's your name, and my name, and you know, she said, don't you know your own name?

I said, yeah, I do, but I'm just trying to tell a story, she said, oh, okay, just making a bit of shortcuts, okay, and she said something about going on holiday, I said, yeah, yeah, that's what I'm doing, and I realised she meant she was going on holiday, and I didn't see her for the rest of the week, I was there for seven days, I think.

The very last day, going out to get on the coach, and she follows me out to say goodbye, and I can't remember if she kissed me, or gave me a hug, or something, it was just like, oh, great, someone, she liked me, we clearly got on well, but it was too late, because now I'm about to leave the country, and she said to me, I spoke to you last night, but you didn't want to talk to me, I said, oh, okay, I said, were you wearing a make-up?

No, I didn't say anything about make-up, I said, oh, I can't remember what I said, and I was drunk all the time when I was there, pretty much, and she, so that was kind of a missed opportunity, but I kind of got on really well with three of the waitresses, three other ladies, four, actually, because it was like one at each bar, and one was a waitress, one was the, yeah, one was a waitress, I forget her name, she's the first person I met, and we chatted, and we did, we arranged to go out on a date.

The second one was, she ran the pizza place, and I chatted her up, and we arranged to go on a date.

The third one, she was in the pool bar, so basically, there was a bar above the pool. She had a boyfriend, so there was nothing going on there, but I just really liked her, so I spent time with her. But the, when I did go to leave, I went to say goodbye to her, and she pulled me into a little room, gave me a big hug, so I just, and her telephone number, so yeah.

But the, so I made a mistake, it was communication, that's what it was, or miscommunication. There was the waitress, I forget her name, so I'm just going to call her the waitress. The waitress, she, we arranged to go out in the evening.

I went to the bar that she was supposed to be, she was there, but she was with someone else, another man, so I just, she saw me, and she carried on talking to him, so I thought, oh, okay, I better leave this. And then, the lady in the pizza place, I arranged to meet her. I met up with her, and I, no, I saw her in the bar, and I said, would you like a drink? And she nodded her head, no, which means yes, but I didn't realise it meant yes, or it meant no, and, or I forgot, so I said, oh, okay then, bye.

And then, the next day, I was speaking to the other waitress, and apparently what happened between them is they both said they'd met a nice English man who asked them out, who, and they both said, oh, and it turned out it was me. I'd asked both of them out, and I think they were even living in the same room, in the same hotel room. In an ideal situation, it might have worked out, but, yeah.

And then, right at the end, there was the lady from the reception. Who else was, I know someone else from another bar, but I never, I used to sort of say hello, but that was it. I didn't want to be greedy, but what it is, is a communication.

I didn't communicate the way I was trying to. I wasn't trying to ask everyone out. I was just trying to get to know them, you know, sort of, and I didn't know if they liked me or not.

It turned out that three of them did. Four of them did, and they all lived in Bulgaria, and I live here, and I came back, and I tried to contact the lady that left me a telephone number, but very difficult. Just couldn't get through.

Had to buy one of those special telephone cards, you know, and didn't work. It would have been so much easier now with the internet. I know we had internet in 2003, but, well, no, it's 2002, but not like this.

Now, it's just like, oh, it's your Facebook page, and you can just call anyone anywhere in the world. It's easy, so easy. So, I got, and I dated a, not Bulgarian, a Romanian lady that was my last girlfriend, pretty much, was Romanian, and I think, I think what it is, although there is, I think the disadvantage is also an advantage for me.

So, there's a disadvantage of miscommunication, which could be harmful, of course, but the longer it takes for them to understand me, the longer it takes for them to realize what I'm like. So, they might be with me thinking I'm nice for a few months, a little bit longer. Before they listen, they think, wait a minute, I don't want to know, I don't want to know, oh, no, why does he keep talking about those Bulgarian girls in that hotel? I wonder if he's making it up.

I wonder if he's ever really had a girlfriend. I don't think he has. Look at him.

I think he's a virgin. Oh, I'm not a virgin. You're a virgin.

There's nothing wrong with being a virgin, actually. I'll be honest, when I lost my virginity, I didn't feel any different. I just felt very tired and disappointed, disappointed, and I felt sorry for the lady that had to put up with me.

I wanted to apologize and say to her, look, you will recover. I just didn't know what I was doing. I'm sorry, because, okay, I won't go into details, but just it's not always a bad thing, though, not knowing what you're doing, because sometimes you go places that you don't realize you.

It's a bit like driving in a new area, and you don't know the area, and you turn a corner, and you end up, you know, seeing things that you didn't know existed, and you wouldn't have seen them before. So, you know, sometimes the good thing about not knowing what you're doing. Yeah, on that note, I'm gonna go.

So thank you very much. Thank you very much. I hope that was boring enough to drift you into a drifty, sleepy, drift, drift, sleep.

We learned a bit of Romanian, because I've met a Romanian person that I like. I'm actually trying to help her out a bit, actually, but I've got this Romanian app on my phone. So, yes is da, no is nu, erififidurchi is goodbye, rififidurchi, rififidurchi, something like that.

And there's some other words. That's not the entire language. There are other words to learn.

It's a start, isn't it? It's a start. I reckon love can help you to learn a new language. But to be fair, I never loved anyone enough to want to learn English.

There's a joke there somewhere. Okay, I'm gonna go. Thank you very much.

Bye bye.