#66 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks (Jason Newland) (3rd December 2019)

Hello and welcome to relaxation hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. My name is Jason Newland, please only listen to this when you can safely close your eyes. And if you'd like to support this free service then please go to paypal.me forward slash Jason Newland.

Now I hope you're well, I hope you're able to have a bit of time to spend with me to calm your mind down, to just just be in this moment. Because I've been thinking about that lately, about actually just being here, you know, where you are right now. Not just physically physically, but in your mind.

You know, not thinking about the future, not dwelling on the past, not even thinking about the next 10 minutes, but just being in this moment. And what I've noticed, apart from it being quite peaceful, it almost feels like time doesn't exist. It might seem like a strange sentence.

But when you're doing something, you're watching television. When I watch television, I can feel time going by. When I'm outside on a bus, I can feel time going by because people are traveling around, people are moving, they're doing things.

Even when I'm sitting in a chair, I'm thinking about the future. I can almost feel the time moving. Sometimes as if I'm moving into the future in my brain, in my mind.

And then when I'm thinking about the past, reminds me of the time that's gone past. The time, all those years that have gone by since whatever it is that I'm thinking about, or even sitting, talking to somebody, I can get a sense of the time moving. But when I just sit, have my eyes closed, or maybe have my eyes open, whatever, whichever I want to do, I can just sit.

I like to do it outside if it's a nice day. But just sit there, or stand there. Keep your eyes open if you're standing up, it's a pretty good idea.

Just getting in touch with now, not in an esoteric or spiritual level, just in a factual way. Now, how do you feel right now? And then ask yourself again, how do I feel right now? And that feeling of relaxation, or there might be feelings of discomfort in certain parts of your body, it changes. And there's that sense within us, I think, I feel that it's almost like we don't change, we're somehow fixed.

Fixed in a specific way. Like, oh, I've got a pain in my stomach, therefore, that's all there is. When actually, that physical, it's a physical sensation, you take away the word and it's a physical sensation.

And that physical sensation doesn't stay the same, it changes. And it changes depending on what you think about as well. So if someone's got a pain in their stomach, and they start thinking about all the possible worst case scenarios, then there's a good chance that pain in the stomach would increase and become more uncomfortable.

If on the other side, you think to yourself, oh, I'll probably just need to do a big fart. I'll just wait for a while, and then I'll just feel fine. Regardless of whether or not that's true, you'll actually feel different.

Because that's how it works. It's how our bodies and our brains work. We're affected by what we think about.

And of course, just saying, stop thinking, it's a very easy two words to say. But for some, it seems practically impossible to do. I'm kind of lucky because I haven't got much going on in my head.

So I'm just really slow. I'm already moving quite slowly, in some ways. And plus, I've got quite a few years of meditation practice behind me.

And when I used to meditate quite a lot at one point. And so I guess that has helped. But it's something about getting in touch with how you feel, but not judging it.

Because it goes against, I think it goes against our natural instincts to focus on something that is unpleasant. Whether it's a feeling, or specifically a feeling really, or a thought. But the thought's only a problem because of the feeling that comes up after the thought.

If you thought about something that wasn't very nice, but you felt great, I suppose you should see a therapist. But other than that, it's not going to be a problem, necessarily. So it's the feeling that arises after the thought.

And that avoidance that we all have within us to avoid the thing that hurts. And it's natural and it's completely understandable. I mean, the most logical thing in the world is to avoid pain.

It's logical. And to avoid stress and to avoid anxiety. That's logic.

However, on the flip side, it's not realistic. Because there's always going to be situations, issues, problems, challenges. And even if you sit in your house and you never leave, there's still issues that come up.

With physical issues, there can also, a lot of people that have anxiety, perhaps it's because of a chronic physical issue, condition. And some of that stress may come through trying to avoid that physical, or trying to avoid thinking about it, or even addressing it. Because that's the logical thing to do, is to avoid discomfort and to move towards comfort.

It's logic and it makes sense, but it's not realistic. Because in order to have comfort and pleasure, we also need to be open to pain and suffering. It's not necessarily about welcoming it.

Although I have mentioned that in previous recordings, when you say, come on then, give me all you got, something changes. The way we think and the way we feel, the way we react, changes. Because you're no longer scared.

And I'm no longer scared. It's almost like standing up to a bully. And it's rewarding, there's a reward that comes from that, which is beyond measure, emotionally.

But then it opens up the idea of, well, is my body bullying me because I've got chronic pain? No, not really. But if you look at it from an angle of, you're not going to allow that physical sensation to control you, then you're standing up to it. You're addressing it.

Just like with stress, with stressful situations, with feelings in the body, by addressing it, by saying, okay, I'm not sure what this is. And something, I'll mention this, there's probably some people listening to this that are perhaps my kind of age, there's going to be young people, there's going to be people a lot older possibly. What I've noticed as I've got older is some of the symptoms of stress that I personally have experienced could have been something different.

So, and to give an example, and I was ill yesterday and I called up NHS direct, I didn't call up for the hospital or anything, didn't call up emergency services, but I was having palpitations in my heart or my chest. I didn't feel as if it was a panic attack. I didn't have that, I did feel panicky a little, I was worried and concerned, but not in a way that I have been in the past.

And I was struggling with my breath and I thought, okay, I left it for an hour, did some relaxation exercises and it did help. But then when I stopped doing the relaxation exercises, it kind of came back. I was like, oh, what's this? So, I called up NHS direct, which is a national helpline in England and they asked me questions and they said, we're sending an ambulance.

I said, well, I don't really want an ambulance. If you think I need to go to the hospital, I'll just get a taxi and go. They said, it's too late, we've already phoned an ambulance.

We have to. Based on my age, based on the details I gave, never in my life have I had an ambulance come to me. I've gone to the emergency ward at least twice, maybe three times with pain in my chest stuff and it ended up being panic attacks.

But this felt different. I think that the point of this story is, don't ignore what's going on. So, by actually addressing it, you're also not ignoring it.

Because you can't ignore and address something at the same time. And it might be something important, might be something that you need to get checked out. It probably isn't, but it might be.

And just keeping that in mind could save your life. And I'm not trying to be dramatic. I'm just trying to be real, you know.

Don't ignore physical issues just because you might think to yourself, well, it's just stress, just the anxiety. Even though it may have been many times in the past, doesn't mean it is. Definitely that.

So it's worth getting yourself checked out just to make sure. Okay, so that's important. I'm not saying everyone rush to the hospital because that's not what I'm not saying that at all.

But if it's something to do with your chest, you're breathing, and it feels completely different from a panic attack. Another thing I would say is, and this is something I've only done twice, but it's really worth doing. Just turning to an advice, an advice recording this.

If you've got someone that lives near you, someone that you can knock on their door, or phone them up any time of the day. I know we've not always got someone, I've not got many people like that, perhaps two people that I could phone up. And one of them might not have the phone on, but he lives downstairs, so I can knock on his door.

Just to be with you, even if it is on the phone. Sometimes just that distraction is the difference between the recovery time from the anxiety event. So basically, the NHS direct person on the phone said, we've sent an ambulance, have you got anyone you can contact to be with you for when the ambulance arrives? And I said, well, I can knock on my friend's door downstairs, bearing in mind this was quarter to one in the morning, I think it was.

And I did, and he was awake, and he came up, and it did distract me. I still had some of the feelings, but it did start to subside. And it was about two and a half hours before the ambulance actually arrived, because they're busy, and the paramedics were brilliant, they did a, it's an ECG thing, you know, they put all those label stickers on my chest and my stomach, and checked my blood pressure.

Everything was perfect. Everything. He even gave me a diabetes test, perfect.

So by the time that they'd finished examining me, and showing me the results, I felt fine. I felt guilty. I felt ashamed, I'll be honest, I did.

I felt tearful, in fact, I felt like a fraud. That's how I felt. But that wasn't fair on me to feel that way.

Well, I wasn't being fair on myself, because I legitimately thought, and I was concerned for my health. I didn't call an ambulance, they called it. I didn't, you know, I felt guilty.

It's also, what's ridiculous about it, is while my ECG, my heart monitor was being done, I was almost hoping that they'd find something, just so that I hadn't wasted their time. Just so that I was actually not, I didn't want it to be stress, I didn't want it to be some kind of anxiety-provoking thing. Because this part of me thinks, that should never happen again.

Even though I would never say that to another person. I would never tell another person, you know, it's ridiculous, you know, you should be over this by now. How can you help other people if you've not completely got over it yourself? Well, you know what? I'm going to be doing this stuff for a long time.

There might come a time when I'm very ill. And I guarantee you, if I was diagnosed with cancer, I would be making recordings of people with cancer. So anyone saying, you know, you can't do stuff helping people, unless you're completely well yourself.

Well, that would be, we wouldn't have many doctors left. Wouldn't be that many paramedics, or nurses. Because there's a huge rate of anxiety and stress within the mental health sector, people, you know, psychiatrists, social workers, psychologists.

It's a massive issue with people from all places, especially high-stress jobs, like working in the health service, whether private or, you know, public. So realistically, there's no reason for any of us to feel guilty. And I realise when I'm talking about, I felt guilty, I felt ashamed.

I'm talking about myself, I'm talking about how I felt. I'm not talking about how anyone else should feel. Because I don't tell anyone how they should feel.

It's none of my business. I'm not in a position to tell another person how to feel. I can offer a few tips.

I can offer my experience. I can offer some professional experience as a therapist. Some personal experience from many years of mental health issues, going back to childhood.

All the books I've read, all the things I've studied, all the people that I've counselled and helped. But it doesn't mean I can tell someone else how to be, or how to live, or how you should feel. Just like you can't do that to anyone either.

You know, we can try. But the reality is, the only thing we could do really is work on ourselves. And part of the reason I haven't made one of these recordings for a little while is because I've had a bit of a rough time.

But you know, with the bipolar, I've had a bit of a difficult emotional time. And when I'm like that, I feel like a fraud. I feel like, why, how can I make recordings, making out that I can help others, when, you know, I can't even help myself.

That kind of mentality, which is not helpful to me. And I've had quite a lot of feedback telling me that actually, what I do is helpful. And it can also be helpful to hear somebody else's honesty.

Because there's lots of things you'll find on YouTube, lots of stuff you'll find where there's an expert. This is how you do this. And this is what you do.

And that's it. And just follow this special technique. And perhaps they don't share their own experiences, or maybe they haven't had their own personal experiences.

Which I doubt, actually. Because everybody has had experiences of stress. Everyone, even people that don't think they have, have.

Because it comes out in different ways, doesn't it? It expresses itself in different ways. And this seems to be expressing itself in my physicality, how I felt physically, rather than how I felt emotionally. Because yesterday, I was wide awake.

I remember because I've been tired. I go through periods when I'm tired, and I sleep a lot. But in other periods when I'm really on it, you know, I can't really awake, alert.

And the last two days, I've been really alert. Yesterday, I was sitting on my laptop thinking, why don't I want to go to bed? Like for a nap or something like that. Because that's what I've been doing for two weeks.

Just going for a little nap. And I didn't want to, wide awake. So it's almost, you could say I'm going through, it's not manic, because I don't really get manic or medication.

It's more hyper, hypermania, but like a very low level. Which then kicks in the adrenaline, causes, can cause symptoms of, well, the adrenaline goes, you know, the heart can feel like it's fluttering, but actually nothing's happening. You feel it, but nothing's happening.

It's not physically, nothing physical is really going on. Although you feel it. And that's what's the strange thing about it.

I remember years ago, sitting in a call center, feeling as if my heart was about to literally, that's an old cliche, it felt like it was going to pop out of my chest. I felt like everyone must be able to see my heart pumping.

It was like, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup How do we distinguish between what is real as far as a physical issue and what is caused by stress?

But then, physical issues, real physical issues, can be caused by stress.

So how do we get to the point, or how do I get to the point, of, you might say, yeah, can you please get to the point, Jason? It's unlikely, I always like to take time. Getting to the point of, I think the clue, I think the solution, maybe, is getting to know yourself. Continuously observing yourself.

Being in the now, you know, as often as possible. Almost like checking in. So, you've got a child who's gone to France for the weekend on a school trip.

Never been away from home. Never been out of the country before. You've never had a night without your child being there, maybe.

If you could, you would want to check in with your child every hour. Probably just to make sure that he or she is okay. Not because you're necessarily interested in what they're doing, because you're probably enjoying them being away so you can have some time to do stuff.

You just want to make sure they're okay. Without being intrusive, or too intrusive. So perhaps we can do that ourselves.

Have a little tune in. It can only take 10 seconds, 20 seconds. Just, how am I feeling? What is the feeling? And just observe it.

Because when you do that, you're in the moment. You're not saying to yourself, how am I going to feel tomorrow? How did I feel 22 years ago? You know, you think about now. How am I feeling now? How are you feeling now, in this moment? Without judging it.

Without pre-empting. You know, just being with yourself. Okay, how am I now? And then just move on with whatever else you're doing.

Every hour maybe, just bring yourself back to how you're feeling. How are you feeling? Even if it is just for 10 seconds. Even if it's just for 5 seconds.

How are you feeling? You can get in touch with your body. Notice the floor underneath your feet. Or if you're in a chair, notice the chair supporting your bum and your body.

Maybe noticing your hands that might be resting on a keyboard. You know? Noticing the temperature of the room. Just noticing the people around you.

Noticing the sounds. The mixture of sounds. Not any particular sound.

It might be different voices that you can hear from around the office, for example. You may hear the wind. You may hear the air conditioning.

You might hear the sound of the computers. You might hear the sound of the printer in the distance. It's just sound.

But not focusing on any particular thing. Just being with it in that moment for those few seconds. Almost like a breath.

Because you know, each breath. There's no breath more important than the one we take right now. Your next breath is the most important breath that you'll ever take.

No other breath. No other breath you've ever taken is more important than the breath you take right now. So it's kind of just being in the moment.

It's very meditative. It's very, I suppose almost kind of hypnotic in a sense. But at the same time, it's relaxing.

It's calming. It's allowing. It's also opening yourself up to what is.

You know? Not trying to push away anything. Not focusing on your right thigh because it feels nice. Compared to perhaps your left ankle, which may have been sprained.

So you're not focusing on that because you don't want to feel that feeling. You want to focus on something different. But in that 5 or 10 seconds or 20, 30 seconds or a minute.

Whatever you give yourself. You're not focusing on any particular part. You're just focusing on the whole of yourself.

And if that left ankle is asking for attention, then give it your attention. That's all that pain wants, is your attention. And maybe to do something about it, if at all possible.

And if you are doing whatever is needed. And all that needs is time. Or perhaps you've done everything and there's nothing more you can do.

You can give it your attention. And that's all it needs. And then it can let you get on with what you're doing.

Just like a baby, sometimes all they need is your attention. They'll wake up, they'll cry. And as soon as you go over, they see you.

Maybe you pick the baby up for 30 seconds. Lay it down again. And she or he goes back to sleep.

Because they've got what they needed. They wanted your attention. That's what your body needs.

That's what your mind needs. That's what you need. You need your own attention.

We all have a sense of need and validation from others. And that's kind of a standard thing and it's not always healthy. But what we do need is validation for ourselves, from ourselves.

We need that. We may think that we need validation from others, but we don't. But we do need validation from ourselves.

We do need to understand and accept ourselves. And say to ourselves, it's okay. I'm okay.

I'm going to be okay. And to have that love for yourself. Not ooey gooey love, not like some kind of... This isn't esoteric, it's not spiritual, it's not religious.

This is just love. Caring. Deeply caring for yourself.

Like you would a baby. A small child. Someone that you look at.

It could be your cat. For me, it's my favourite Andre. I look at him and I love him.

With everything I've got, I love him. And he's annoying as anything, but I do absolutely adore him. And if I could get a part of that feeling and aim it towards myself.

If I could get that feeling and plug it in. Almost like a disc into my own heart. And aim it at me.

My life would be transformed. So it's not about doing it all in one go. It's about starting it.

It's about starting to realise that you are worthy of your own love. Your own kindness. Your own consideration.

Your own acceptance. Consideration. You're worthy of all that.

And more. So I'm going to leave you on this recording. And I'll say a few things.

And as usual, I'll go off on tangents. But there is a message here somewhere. And I hope that it's of use.

And I hope you realise that I'm coming from a... I'm trying to come from a kind place. I'm trying to be an understanding. I'm an understanding place.

But I don't know what it's like to be you. You don't know what it's like to be me. None of us knows what it's like to be other people.

Even if we experience very similar situations. It's going to be different for everybody. But by sharing our experience.

By hearing what someone else is going through. Or has gone through. And by considering different ideas.

Ideas that may not have even been, you know, even in your mind before. Just an idea can change the way you think and feel. And I like, I think of these ideas that I kind of mention throughout a recording as being like a buffet.

So you go to a buffet and you just try stuff. You know, you've got lots of different food. Lots of finger food.

Not actual fingers but, you know, sausages and pasties and cheese puffs. And quiche Lorraine. And I'm trying to think of stuff you haven't.

But there's lots of sandwiches. There's lots of different things. And there's going to be stuff there maybe you've never tried before.

Maybe stuff you've looked at before in the past and thought. No thanks. Maybe things you've looked at before and thought.

Maybe. Maybe. He's eating it and he seems to like it.

So it's a case of just testing. And if you don't like it, don't eat it. So it's like a buffet.

That's what these recordings are like. Just a big old buffet full of ideas that you can test. Try on.

As and when you please. So I'm going to go. I want to thank you for listening.

And remember to be kind to yourself. Because you deserve to be happy. Take care.

Bye.