(music) (ASMR) DRIFTING | Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis #539 | Jason Newland | 22nd June 2025

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com. That's my website. My name is Jason Newland. My name, that's my name.

Welcome to let me bore you to sleep. That's the title of the podcast. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes.

That's kind of like a a warning or I don't know if warnings the right word sounds a bit dramatic doesn't it but it's pretty good advice. So I say at the beginning of all of my recordings, just in case there's somebody driving a lorry or a coach full of people and they think I know what I'll do. I've had enough of listening to the radio and well I've had enough of concentrating on the road.

I know what I'll do. I'll listen to a sleep podcast because that should be fine. Shouldn't be any problems there.

I'll listen to that and you know I'll pass the time. Uh there's this one always lasts about an hour. That should be all right.

I think I'll listen to this one. Take your mind off all the screaming kids in the back. Wait a minute.

Oh I shouldn't shouldn't listen to this unless I can close my eyes. Well I'm driving a I'm driving a coach full of children. I can't close my eyes when I'm driving a coach full of children.

Perhaps I better not listen to this at the present moment during this particular activity. So that's that's why I do that. I mean it's I'm not assuming that everybody who's listening to this podcast is indeed a coach driver.

But could you imagine that? But although I suppose if you could stream this this audio into the actual coach but maybe wear earplugs for yourself you could maybe stop the the screaming kids or maybe quieter things down because they'd be listening and and then they might they they they may fall asleep. Hello Andre. Hello darling.

Hello darling. Do you want to give daddy cuddles? Or are you just going to go underneath the chair? Yeah? You'd rather sit underneath the chair. I know what he wants.

He wants. What's in there? I caught you. I caught you.

You want to eat don't you? Do you know what you do? Why are you shaking? Is it? Oh daddy I'm so weak from malnutrition. I'm shaking with weakness. I can hardly hold up my hand and I can't hold the begging bowl anymore.

Please feed me. Yeah sure Andre. Yeah.

I can see that tummy of yours. You don't stop eating. If there's one animal that is not hungry it's this little thing.

I gave him a bit of pizza earlier right a bit of crust and he wanted it but he it was too hard for him to eat. Now I've never seen him do this before. I've seen the results of it but what he did he walked over to his water bowl and he dropped it in the water to soften it up so he could eat it.

Now he does that with his I find some of his hard food like the the crunchy ferret pellet food things that he eats. I find sometimes some of those in the water but I've never seen him actually do it. So he dropped this bit of crust pizza crust in the water and he just waited and then he went to he went to pick it up but he couldn't get to it because it was moving further and further away from him and it's quite a big bowl.

It's actually a litter tray for cats but a cat's never done a woo woo in there so you know it's clean. He just have his water in there so that it's can have it's a big big maybe not big but it's quite a lot of water in there so he can wash his face he could put his nose under the water have a little drink and you know sometimes he puts his paw in there but basically he couldn't get to the crust which was now soggy and he was trying everything because he can't stand water on his hands or his feet. By the way I'm cuddling him now he's just resting on me on my belly.

It's like a big pillow daddy it's like a big pillow except unlike pillows it's a bit grumbly it grumbles sometimes moves about and depending you know on what you've been up to it definitely smells different to a pillow.

Oi stop it and he couldn't get to the crust he was trying but he couldn't get to the crust and he was doing everything and every time his his little hand went into the water he was trying to balance to try and catch it this bit across he'd like oh oh the water touched my hand i'm a little baby i can't stand it oh i'm just such a little oh daddy please put please can you put a nappy on me please could you feed me by hand i'm such a little baby oh i need to

be carried everywhere oh could you burp me now please i've had some food i can't do burps by myself tap me on the back because i'm just a little baby all right don't bite me stop it so he couldn't get to it so i watched him in fascination for about three and a half minutes it wasn't a long adventure but it was you know it was definitely interesting to see how he was trying to get it now i thought what he was going to do and what he probably would have done a few years ago

do you want to get down oh okay what he would have done a few years ago is push it push the thing over but he can't because it's too heavy it's full of water what water is surprisingly heavy have you ever tried this you ever tried to pick up you know those floatable um those inflatable like mini pools you can buy for your family uh to swim in or christen a mother or whatever you want to do with them without watering you can you can actually lift them above your head with watering you can probably

get to your waist it's just you know it's very hard what water is deceivingly heavy anyway he couldn't get to it so what i did is i got it out myself it took a while because you know i had to balance as well i managed to get my mouth underneath the water and grab it and get it out for him i didn't want my hand going in the water because i don't like it either and you know i didn't realize but then when it happened like oh it doesn't feel nice i don't like that water

on my hands um pretty much like most teenage boys who've been in a lavatory oh keep that water away from me i don't want to wash my hands oh no i might turn into a gremlin or an adult so he was i gave it and then i gave it to him it was all soggy and he was like and he ate it ate it all up and some would say that's not particularly interesting story some would say it's a bit of a boring story some would say it's not even a story at all that's it

that's that's the whole thing done so sit up before i start i would like to say big happy birthday to somebody this is somebody that i've had you know quite a bit of contact with for quite a long time and it's her birthday so it's it's um it's really you know i thought it'd be good to to dedicate this podcast episode to her because she's a very close and dear friend of mine and um it might seem like i'm stalling just trying to remember what her name is uh just looking up her name oh rachel

so rachel happy birthday to rachel um she sent me a text brilliant best text i've a message on she literally just sent it to me at 142 and it's 152 now sorry you had a rough day on monday by the way can you lend me 90 pound brilliant best message ever great um she did say yesterday oh no she said today it's still tuesday it is technically it's it's wednesday but it's still tuesday because i'm awake i would have done this earlier but i've had a a busy day you put it this way put it

that way she said it's my birthday today please will you give me a shout out so i said hi rach i should give you a big old shout out later today happy birthday and she said thank you and then she said and then she said that message about lending me lending her 90 pound brilliant i love it that's my favorite message ever i also want to do a shout out for april as well he's been going through a difficult time so i just want to sort of uh send my love and also i want to

say thank you to helen big thank you to helen who sent me a paypal gift today so thank you very much i really appreciate it it's lovely to get little gifts and stuff it's it's nice it's like a little christmasy moment you know or birthday moment except it wasn't christmas or my birthday you know what i mean without the awkwardness of uh singing songs and stuff so thank you helen i really appreciate that and another big shout out for for molly as well so thank you molly as well who also sent me a paypal gift

on um i don't know what it was i think it was yes i thought it might have been monday so thank you very much um i lose track of days i'll have another drink have a sip of my drink i'm gonna get drunk one day i'm gonna do one of these recordings drunk i'm just interested to see what will come out so i'm always stone sober when i do these might not sound like it sometimes but i am i never do it under the influence of anything it's always it's always me sometimes i've had some

weetabix first that is the the influence of um wheat abix and sugar you could say sugar actually definitely under the influence of sugar but tomorrow my dear fellows i've got another food delivery well no i've got a food delivery coming i'm getting some stuff for my friend as well um so i'm gonna get i'm getting stocked up on andre's food but you know probably just enough to get to christmas it's not a huge amount so it's enough to get to christmas for him um some other bits some breakfast cereal milk and some healthy food i've

actually i've ordered i've ordered some chocolate bars but less than i did before so i don't know if i'm ever gonna stop eating chocolate i might do but i don't know if it's ever gonna happen i'm not sure if i care whether it happens or not what i do know is i am going to get i'm gonna lose fat for me it's not about losing weight it's about reducing the fat in my body see i don't care if i go from being 100 kilos to being 120 kilos i don't care if my weight goes up

as long as my waistline doesn't go up so if my uh thighs get a bit thicker because they're muscly or my shoulders or my arms whatever then it's fine but i kind of don't really see myself getting heavier because because of my height i think my weight is probably as heavy as i think is i think it's as heavy as it's comfortable i think on my frame and i'm not i'm not skinny believe it or not but five or eight hundred kilos yeah i think that's probably is heavy enough but i'm not bothered i don't

care if i go up if i got i don't want to be 200 kilos because well that would be impossible i think i think that would be physically impossible i would i wouldn't be able to walk i mean i'd be yeah i don't i mean to double the weight i'd end up being five foot eight wide wouldn't i instead of three foot wide yeah so that's not gonna happen so i um i imagine or i'm guessing let's you know medical reasons or whatever but i think i may lose a bit of weight but i might

put a little bit weight on but i won't i'm gonna lose i'm gonna be reducing my fat and part of the way i'm going to do that is more more than reducing the fat intake or cholesterol intake it's a case of i want to be burning more off not more than i take in because that doesn't because then that's negative isn't it there's no point if i if i take in three thousand calories a day i don't know how the correct amount is i'm saying that as an example and before you start wait a minute

three thousand calories that's way too much it possibly is i don't know i don't know but if i burn off four thousand calories then i mean i need some of those calories you know for organs to work and you know i don't you know i mean i think it's not so much about well if you if you work off five thousand calories then you're gonna lose weight and yeah admittedly but i'd imagine it's a case of i almost knew where i was going with this until i realized i didn't um we need a certain amount

of calories just for life don't we it's not just about energy to walk around and to do you do stuff it's for brain functioning and healing and all that stuff that goes on calories turned into energy for that stuff for the heart to keep pumping and stuff which is handy so i'm glad it does it i'm glad it's automatic the old heart so i'm ever so forgetful sometimes you know so that it's automatic so i'd like i've got me exercise bike i've got i've been doing some weights i've been trying i've not used the exercise

bike really lately part of the reason for that i'm going to use it as an excuse but it's not a very good excuse but i'm going to use it as an excuse anyway a week ago a week this weekend it's just it's more than a week but i had a couple of my neighbor and his friend came up here we were always watching boxing and i changed the room around to make room for two people because as it is there's one chair in here i do that on purpose so that people don't want to stay

doesn't always work but you know um i don't make it my flat is not welcoming to visitors it's like oh that's a bit rude well not really it's just honest it's not i'm not sort of saying i don't want you in it but no one i haven't got a big comfy settee or sofa where people can sit down and melt into it and just feel so comfortable that they're just happy to sit there for hours and hours no i don't get that here because i don't want someone sitting on a sofa for hours and hours

and hours because that's was kind of a waste of my time it's it's negative time in a way of not rude again i don't mean it rudely i've got things to do i've got recordings to make i've got work to do on you know the the service i do whether it's studying and you know i've got books to read i've got i've got things to do basically i've got tv programs to watch as well so sitting talking it's okay sometimes sometimes i need to do it and i'll be honest i'd like to be honest but

sometimes i do i need to sit down and have a chat with someone who's also talking back or you know i do need that intercommunication sometimes maybe five six times a year perhaps maybe maybe it's seven eight times a year i don't know maybe it's less but it isn't that often you know it's about as often as we're doing you know when you have a poo and it just and you go to wipe and it's like oh i don't actually need to wipe you still wipe but you know it's like oh wow that was good

almost like a little submarine just uh popped out and it was like oh magic that was lovely what a clean what a clean what a clean uh episode it's just it's nice it's like it's a rarity it's a nice okay so what you're saying is sitting down and talking to a friend is like doing a poo where you don't have to really do much wiping afterwards yeah it sounds bad when you put it like that i'm not comparing it to doing a poo i suppose there are some similarities get to sit down while you're doing

it um i suppose the do the poos better because it doesn't last as long you know i like conversations that are over and done with the whole meet and greet in a street i like that hello you all right yeah you you and it's like oh take care bye bye bye and sometimes a conversation can last five six seven minutes but it's it seems like really precious time like really you know focused positive energy a nice little interaction quality time that what is what i class as quality time meeting someone maybe in a shop you

haven't seen for a few months or maybe a few years even um might be a family member that you only see at funerals and weddings it's like hey hello yeah you put on weight yeah thanks thanks for noticing oh you're going bald as well yeah cheers thanks auntie and then just like yeah thanks mum and so it's i quite like the short conversations which is you may say isn't it ironic don't you think that i actually talk for like constantly for maybe an hour or more most days you'd think she's quite chatty wouldn't you and

i kind of am but i mean i'll give you an example today i was out my friend was saying oh look at her isn't she pretty look at and he said um i just can't believe there's so many women out today because we live in a um a little village and there's no there so it is literally it's you've got the isle of man this is the village of village of man if you've ever been to the isle of man three women live there i thought it was a joke it's not three women um and

i we were there and he's and he said all these women all these people look all the and i said you know what you see you see a lovely beautiful woman you know what i see i see another person i don't want to talk to just another person i don't want to talk to and he said oh you're so grumpy i said no i'm honest i don't it's like so what she she's physically appealing to you lovely but i've seen women before it's not a novelty anymore you know i've seen them i mean there's a

lamppost there look it's a lamppost yeah it's a lamppost well you would look i haven't seen a lamppost for ages yes it's a lamppost that's how it's how i am with humans it's just a lamppost it's just another lamppost why are we getting excited there's billions of them why are you getting so excited about a particular one there's billions you know it's like oh i found a ladybird it's precious i do love ladybirds by the way but it's a ladybird and that's what it used to be like in england it's a ladybird oh fly fly

fly away home um uh go away the house is on fire and your kids are inside fly away there was a rhyme that actually had that those words in it it's like ladybird ladybird fly away home your house is on fire your kids are all gone i was like really and the ladybird always used to look up like that's not very nice that's a horrible what a horrible song and i know it's not real because i heard you say it to tracy earlier my friend tracy she flied down got on your on your hand you

said the same thing to her it's spreading around mate all of the ladybird community now know about this rhyme we actually took it seriously my friend todd flew all the way home right he got a speeding ticket gets home after the speeding ticket gets in a row with a policeman gets a speeding ticket gets home everything's normal everything's fine and his wife's there and his baby and his kids they're all there ain't no one gone nowhere ain't no fire nothing he was so disappointed i said what do you mean disappointing surely you should have been

happy i didn't say that because ladybirds can't talk i don't know why i'm why we're doing this anyway yeah and in the old days you see a ladybird it's like ah it's the precious little ladybird or you may say ladybug i think they're called ladybugs in some parts of the world of course ladybird is the correct term as you you know i like to educate people i mean ladybugs ladybugs seems to be fair they both sound like really silly names really ladybird well clearly ain't a bird is it is it a lady i mean if

they were all ladies i'm guessing not an expert on lovemaking trust me you probably i'm sure you believe that and if you ask if you can um dig up any of my ex-girlfriends and if they could still talk they would say i'm rubbish yes i haven't buried them what am i saying honest uh the problem with being the problem with um it's got to be quite annoying isn't it imagine these people the serial killers that like bury the victims in their garden they can never move can they always have to stay there anyway ladybirds oh

it's a precious ladybird it's so precious and they they were lovely i still do love ladybirds even even the feeling of them just like walking along my finger or whatever else i could get them to walk on and you can feel their little feet and i know you can't hear them but i'm sure they're whistling like a little happy tune like a disney film it's a lovely lovely day walking on jason's hand and other sentences that would rhyme with jason's hand and in about 1974 it all changed in england all changed so instead of being

this oh it's the ladybird stop stop wait a minute no let's not let's stop the wedding stop the wedding it's a ladybird everyone gather round have a look at the ladybird that's my granddad um and but my granddad wasn't he was dressed as a ladybird that was very weird but as he always used to say he used to quote the uh the greece the greece song the lyrics there are worse things i could do to dress him up as a poo i did that a little bit you're obsessed with anal things just say the word

anal wonder if men have anal glands you know dogs do don't they have to have them squeezed although i know a dog and he said to me you know what we don't actually have to have them squeezed but we like it a lot so really weird so in about 1974 there was an invasion an invasion of ladybirds and when i say invasion billions of them billions and billions and billions i didn't count them it might not be it's got to be billions just because it's so tiny and you could see from outer space you could

see the swarm again i'm just making that up but they overtook the country they didn't they didn't overtake the country as it like militarily but but if you google it you'll see so you see i'm not making this up but in ladybird invasion 1974 united kingdom of the commonwealth uh england uk britain and then you can get to see in europe somewhere tiny little island it's really for places like america so you if you're brought up in america and you know you i don't know if still the same but i've talked doing this my audio

i've got a big audience in america like not a big audience but a large proportion the largest proportion of my audience is lived in america but i've also got people living all over the place all over the world but just as a you know the largest proportion is in america percentage largest percentage so over the last 15 years i've got to speak to quite a few american people quite a few people that have i've spoken to me from on skype on facebook on telephone or text them message them found out stuff about them i've garnered

some information along the way about some of the differences and also some of the stuff that happens there that isn't necessarily common knowledge outside of america unless it just wasn't common knowledge to me which is possible so the whole uh singing i don't know what it's called the the star spangled the the uh i'm not i'm generally don't know the name the the national anthem i think yeah let's say the national anthem because every country's got a national anthem and i suppose those countries that keep changing their name every six months maybe they have to

change the national anthem but and it used to be my understanding that in classrooms right from young all the way up to sort of i don't know high school maybe even college as well i don't know they would all sing the national anthem and pay uh i don't know respect or whatever to the american flag and there was that to the constitution and stuff again i don't know all the ins and outs now we don't do that in this country in england there is no such thing as that we don't that isn't done um depending

on what kind of school the kids go to again it's changed since i left school i mean i've i've been in school for about 92 years when i was there we used to have an assembly every morning and we used to sing hymns like christian hymns but there were also roman catholic schools um and i suppose there'd be other schools like synagogue schools and stuff where they um i don't know if they sing or not so but back in them days it was you know it was it wasn't so much that the schools were religious

it's just that this country was a christian country uk england rather was a christian country and didn't it didn't have it had other obviously it was probably had other religions probably hundreds of years maybe uh from you know but it wasn't it was very much just about christians although i went to a catholic school i lived but i lived in the with the nuns i went to a catholic school so i i actually it was like a religious school and i also went to church every morning before going to school and i think probably in

the evening as well so it's you know i've kind of seen both sides so i know what it's like to live a religious life as a child like deeply kind of every part of your life is pretty much to do with that and i did that for a few years it's a long time ago so i don't really remember that much of it and then when i went to like a mainstream school when i was about seven i did just it was just like a kind of christian kind of school the thing is when it

came to history geography it was quite weird because the england was always bigger on the map always it looks like oh it's a fairly big country and as you get older they start showing you real maps proper maps and you know in america you you're saluting the flag and like this is the greatest country in the world and of course no other country believes that about america other than america and every other country perhaps thinks that about themselves as well you know i'm sure iraq and maybe australia and china all think that they're the best

country in the world i don't know i've not asked everyone because that would take ages and the thing is though i think i'd feel a bit more confident if i was in america and always you know sort of america's great and doing all this stuff and then look at the map and see america you can see it on a map it's big like yeah i live there of course no one points out that canada's actually a bigger land mass but hey let's forget that america 360 million people canada bigger land mass 20 million people or

whatever it's a smaller i don't know how many hell of a smaller people it's not they're not smaller a lot less people but bigger area but you wouldn't necessarily know that from some of the maps especially the earlier maps so it's like america and a tiny little bit canada like no canada much bigger but america's huge huge huge and basically right if you've got america and you've got england if this is the back of my hand right the whole of my hand the back of my hand was america then that liver spot there would be

my country did he just say liver spot oh yeah he is 50 isn't he yes but he's got quite a few of those by now oh god that really makes him sound smelly smelly and old don't what would you say that smelly and old old and smelly don't necessarily go together as it happens i am smelly but that's not the point it's got nothing to do with why are you so rude towards me i don't get it so i i think i'd be a bit more impressed you know when i was at school i look

at the map like you know like god save the gracious queen it's like them being told we're the greatest country and we used to rule the the waves and we used to rule the country the world and we you know okay now look at the map now find it was like now find england okay you're gonna need to give me more clues there find find england this is where you live find it it's the greatest country in the world we used to rule the world now just find find england on the map without a magnifying

glass yeah you could find it if you've got a bigger map you know i mean i couldn't believe like there it is is it is that it no that's europe you're in europe really what about that no that's that's germany belgium france what well that's it england there england is so small that on some of the maps they couldn't actually put the whole world the whole world the whole word on there they just put like ang there wasn't enough room on the map to spell the country because it took up such little space on the

map i remember looking and thinking there's not enough room there for my bed never mind my bedroom oh wow it's so tiny and then they they explained ratios and you know space and it's not really the size of the country you know the size of that little obviously where would we all live where would it go to the toilet you know in the sea but the sea would get full up just in one way wouldn't it yeah if it was the size of the page it's not is it so i was really surprised i thought

wow so you got china the only countries that really kind of stood out with their maths was china india africa all the different parts of africa america so it's russia of course oh that's that in my mouth oh it's my tongue was it what other places canada i'm probably missing out some but you know the big places that are obvious but then you get to europe and although it's a big area europe is a big old continent isn't it and i only remember the word continent from you know incontinent as soon as you know that

it's just the word incontinent continent so europe is regular it's a regular place it's a continent it has control of its bells i don't know that's that's the way that i remembered it but such a time the thing is if you live if you were born born if you were born in england right or scotland wales uk whatever you want to call it let's just say england i don't say england for me it's more for my welsh and scottish friends who like to think of it separate you know people in wales that's a different country

scotland is a different country you england is a different country i know some people just like to say uk it's easier but then britain i'm not quite sure what britain is anymore but england i've never lived anywhere else apart from in england so i just you know that's why i say england and oh it's so small such a tiny little island well i've been stranded in the middle of the night on the main highway motorway with me with me things sticking out trying to get a lift you know from a lorry driver and i remember

once another another hitchhiker saying uh i was moaning saying oh god don't pick me up he said well try using your thumb so but being stranded in the middle of night or even the middle of the day you realize it's a big country i guess it's all down to it's all down to perception isn't it or perspective so if you were traveling 500 miles an hour this is a tiny country if you're trapping walking speed like me it's massive but i'd like to go to america i would i like the idea is is a thing

i like the idea of getting a visor and traveling i don't know how long like six months or i don't know what the what the rules are and just go no but with enough money to pay for like uh like cheap motel rooms and just do that travel across america make podcasts make a video you know record of it as well for the youtube channel just say i'm in georgia now i'm in telewhoopie or or pingy bongy or whatever the different places are it's like hey i'm in phoenix arizona i'm in california and i fit

in perfectly with all the perfect body that i have so i'd like to do that and maybe do a few interviews along the way you know just i think it might be interesting to sort of maybe do that for three months or six months and still do the podcast still do what i do but you know just a different setting and i guess if i was traveling i wouldn't be able to have quite this setup that i have here i'm going to take microphones with me it'd be very uh everything probably just done on a

mobile phone or on the ipad but i could probably do that by getting a special microphone that works for the ipad that costs a bit of money but you know this way always weighs around it there's always ways around if you know what you what the target is for you you know i want to get better quality sound but i also want it to be small you know i want it to be able to fit in a case because at the moment with two tripods two microphones the mixing desk thing the other thing the headphones

the ipad all this stuff together would fit a suit i need a suitcase for this lot just on its own not a big suitcase but you know quite compact bulky thing so that wouldn't really work so it might be a case of doing it on the phone so the quality of the sound might not be perfect it's never going to be perfect i suppose but yeah i quite like the idea of that but there's something about you know like these school kids in america they're saying they're singing a national anthem and then they look at

their map and they see that it's a huge country it's like yeah here it's like although i know it's it's big to me i know that's not always the best uh the best argument oh it's big to me but it's it's quite small it's a very small country compared to the rest of the world i mean there are smaller countries i think belgium's smaller and i don't know what other countries are smaller than this i mean population wise we have a larger population than a lot of other countries that are bigger in fact we have

a larger population than canada a larger population in australia australia of course it's another big country isn't it we've got a larger population in australia um we've got a larger population than a few european countries that are bigger than us i mean london is one of the largest populated cities in the world if not no it's probably not the largest because i think if you go to someone like brazil i think you can because brazil's huge population isn't it india i'm sure someone like calcutta they've probably got about 30 million people in one road it's

a big road it's a big road but there's there's a lot of people and it's what a billion we're india and china they're the two countries and they they've got the highest population but brazil's very big as well i think uh brazil i think brazil's got a higher population than america i think mexico's got quite a big population oh this is off the top of my head i don't mean i i mean i had it on some paper it was balanced on the top of my head no i didn't i've got a little slit that

it comes out of like a little printer i do have that information somewhere it's available but i've you know i have looked at stuff online just to out of interest you know populations do interest me a little bit but i know that places like mexico brazil whatever comes some of the so you got south america but then you got north america and north america is canada isn't that so south america but then north america is also compared to south america north america is america confusing but i think there's a few south american countries i feel

like syria and new zealand and hong kong they they got quite i don't know about hong kong what kind of population hong kong has got it used to i mean it's a big it was a financial hub it was a big financial place one of the biggest places in the world next to if not above new york and london possibly but i think it's changed ever since england gave hong kong back to china because they had a hun i think they had a hundred year contract with china i don't know the ins and outs i

never read it but i remember when they handed it back a few years ago and recently like last this last year or so people in hong kong some of them say we want england to rule our waves again which is something i don't think anybody in england ever expected to hear that any country wanted us to be ruling them rule i like to rule it's weird as well isn't it you've got some countries that actually class themselves as british like you know they're they're brought up in a british school system even though they're the other

side of the world but because they're part of the commonwealth part of the uh yeah the original ruling the waves party time and they speak english they're brought up with british customs and they go to school and they you know do you know british schooling system and they class themselves some customers as british and then they come here and they're not treated as british they're not classed as when they get here but they feel british like places in india there were some of them whole areas like they actually were told that they were british there

are british subjects must have been such a shock coming here coming to this country and seeing that britain is nothing like what they thought it would be first of all it's way colder than i imagine any of them could have even imagined i used to date a girl from trinidad and again i think i don't know if trinidad is part of the commonwealth i think it might be which is why you know it might have been back then so people from trinidad were kind of classed as british a commonwealth which meant they could just come

work here in fact they were encouraged they were all asked to come work sort of in the the you know especially after the war and stuff and my girlfriend was she came here to be a nurse and she didn't like the cold she didn't she really didn't i remember i used to um wherever i went whatever building we was in whether it was a cinema or whether it was in a restaurant i always found my way always managed to find the thermostat and turn it down as low as possible to get as cold as possible

i used to love seeing her shiver is that wrong some people like boobies some people like bums some people like feet i like shivering i love shivering you're being serious oh here's i'm going to end with this this is true i'm going to read you out a text i got earlier not even lying okay this is from a neighbor it's a female neighbor okay texted me hi jason i'm not asking you out but would you like to go for a walk tomorrow morning yeah just around the estate i'm bored stiff let me know let me

read that to you again hi jason i'm not asking you out but would you like to go for a walk tomorrow morning i'm bored you could you could interpret it different ways like dear jason or dear mug dear jason i've got no physical attraction towards you at all in fact i could say i almost detest you the way you look and it makes you feel a bit ill but i'm so damn bored i think providing i don't look at you um perhaps you know i should get through it perhaps we can sort of spend some

time and go for a walk we'll be outside so i'll be able to smell you so much um what do you say i just just remind you no physical attraction just let me know that's what i read when i read it that's why that was my interpretation my interpretation hi jason i find you physically disgusting but would you do you want to go for a walk i've got absolutely no one else in my life that wants to talk to me you are the last option um let me know it's it's what do you think what

do you think of that wow and it's true it's not even made up absolutely true wow wow evelyn caldwell she's nice this is someone that facebook people you may know evelyn caldwell she's um lovely but it looks like one of those profiles that ain't real i mean it might be a real but she's a real person she's you know a human being but it might be one of those where if i added her although she hasn't asked me to add her so she probably is perfectly normal you know and i shouldn't be judging but you

know i'll add her or whatever and then suddenly check out my photos come to here how are you going to cost you 42 pound an hour yeah um anyway so that was that's pretty much the whole recording really that's pretty much it there's not really much else to say so thank you very much for listening i really appreciate your time and if you get a chance maybe you could say hi and i'm always happy to read out a message and to say hi to other people as well so let me know so thank you did

i got a message the other day did i read it out did i read it out a really lovely message now i don't know if i read it out or not because it might if it was a few days ago then i would have read it but but but but the other one that i want one that i want ooh ooh ooh the one i need oh yes indeed ooh i got chills they're multiplying dear jason just as i get to sleep you start singing songs from greece how's that supposed to help oh fair enough

i thought you might like it no stop it now no more oh i got a message on youtube don't know if i read it but i'm gonna read it now oh no i did what a riddle oh a few more how much how many views i've got on there okay 94 views on the video one i did which is more than any of my product any of my uploads onto youtube probably for the last year has the one that i did a video so most most views i've had most likes i've had most comments i've

had and that was um the one where i said i'm making videos again on youtube and let me bore you to sleep so 94 94 is not a lot it's way more than i normally get per recording on youtube you know i'm not i don't get much um yeah i don't get many people listening to me on youtube i mean i don't know how many subscribers i've got not many 400 and something i can't say where is it 496 subscribers the last 28 days 36.

8 000 minutes listened 1. 8 000 views and i've had 11 subscribers in the last 28 days not a huge amount really but so the views have gone up but the watch time has gone down a little bit i got chills the emoji playing watch time from subscribers 57. 2 percent that listened to watch my videos on youtube are not subscribed 42. 8 percent are so really likes versus dislikes 95.

2 of people that comment like do like or dislike put a like and natural pain relief is your birthright is the top video that's been watched in the last 28 days 5369 times no minutes 5369 minutes i like to be precise with this stuff i do yes i do you really do so that's it um i had a really rubbish day today but i've not talked about it i might talk about it tomorrow but it was a not the greatest day but i moaned about the day yesterday i didn't want to do another one well

i'm just moaning about the day so i thought i'd uh just just like just like you know muck around a bit muck around a bit you know just hmm doesn't always have to be serious all the time right now i'm going now thank you very much for listening please remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy lots of love bye