(ASMR) (no music) (10 hours) #518 Focus on your Hand - Deep Sleep Whisper Hypnosis (3rd February 2025)

Hello and welcome to jasonnewland.com, my name's Jason Newland and this is Let Me Bore You To Sleep. Please only listen when you can safely close your eyes. Today is Tuesday the 13th of October and I hope you're well and I can't think of anything to say.

What do I normally do? I normally talk about something, I've done it, I've done over 200 of these, I think you're fine, you've done over 500, yeah exactly, that's over 200 isn't it. So the stats, oh my god he's starting off with the stats, can't you wait till I'm asleep please Jay, wait till I'm asleep then talk about the stats, not at the beginning, no, we'll talk about it now. If you don't want me to talk about the stats then you need to send me messages to read out because I'll do that at the beginning and if you don't leave me messages to read out then I won't, I can't do it can I, hey, hey, hey, yes I'm talking to you, don't make out there's no one listening because I know there are, I know there are.

So, Sunday, so this week so far, if you include Sunday being the first day of the week, it's not really, it's Monday but you know what I mean, Sunday I had a really busy day statistically wise, so Sunday the 11th of October I had 7,598 downloads, wow, now that would be nice if that was every day but it isn't at the moment, however, Monday I had 5,810 downloads, today so far and there's still two and a half hours left of the day for stats wise, I seem to like the saying stats wise don't I for

some reason, 5,849 so far today, so there's, yeah from the looks of that that's going to be a, well clearly it's going to be a 6,000 plus, may even reach to 7,000, you never know, it's possible, it's possible, so that's good, so I'm edging towards averaging over 6,000 a day and yeah, yeah, because on a weekly basis, on a weekly basis, that doesn't look very good, it's going up, so the week starting the 7th of September I had 28,111 downloads, the week starting the 14th of September I had 35,691, the week starting the 21st of

September 35,600, oh, 14th 31,658, 21st of September that week 35,691, 28th of September that week a little bit less but 34,943 and then last week the 5th of October 40,070 and this week so far the 12th of October 11,659, now 11,659, the 11th of October is a Sunday so they start it on a Sunday, so in less than three days I've got 11,659, so yeah, I don't know, I'm not sure if that's good or not, I really don't know, I don't know, I don't know, is it?

So that would be 12, 24, oh I don't know, anyway 11,659 which is basically that number that I just gave you, so 7, that doesn't matter, it's not even correct because according to this the 11th, 7,598 plus 5,000 so 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, so actually it's 19,000 not 11,000, how have they managed to get that wrong?

How strange, unless they've not included today yet, yeah that's probably why, so 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, no, so actually I've got about nearly 20,000 already in three days, 7, 5, 8, 5, 8, so 5, and then 5, 8, so that's 1,000, 10,000, 11,000, 12, about 12,000 plus another 7, 5, 12, 19, yeah so it's nearly 20,000, which means that's three days, another four days left of the week, plus I've got another probably 1,000 or so left for the day, which means I could be reaching 20, 40, well 45, 46, maybe even 50,000 this week, wow, it's not bad is it?

Not bad for a young'un like me, so haven't got any messages, spent most of the day in bed, but I was up all night making recordings, so that's OK, I don't mind, had the drillers in the garden drilling again, so didn't really get the sleep that was required, I had an idea, I thought I know what I'll do, I'll play a radio, so I used the app on my phone and played smooth radio, a bit chill, but they didn't play any songs that I knew, so smooth radio plays a lot of like 80s, 70s, 90s,

a lot of ballads, a lot of gentle, but really well known songs, so smooth radio is one of my favourite, it is my favourite to listen to music, LBC is my favourite to listen to talk radio, and so I listen on the Global Player, which is an app on my phone, but I was listening, I don't know how I managed to get onto the chill, the smooth chill, but I must have just, it must have been my thumb moved in the wrong direction, it's normally not dangerous unless you're on a dating site, and you swipe,

you swipe, yes, to the wrong person, yeah, so I was listening to it and the beats were really good, didn't recognise all one song, but the songs went on for ages, and the beats were quite attention requiring, if you know what I mean, it just, it did take my attention away from the grr, grr, grr, and it was annoying me, and I was trying to, then I thought, I don't know what I'll do, I'll stop going grr, grr, maybe I'll just listen to the radio, and it's bad enough I've got people digging up concrete in

the garden without me going grr, grr, it's not helping, and we laughed, and I did listen to it for a while, but then it just got, it was too much of an overload, and I just ended up getting up, and eventually, I think the workers digging up the concrete, it was raining, they were getting a little bit wet, so I think maybe, I don't know, they seemed to stop working, and they were sitting in their van, playing with each other, I guess cards, or you know, telling jokes, you know, just playing with each other, just

getting through the afternoon, and I think it might have been a situation, because they were using electrical equipment, maybe they didn't want to use it in the rain, in case it was dangerous for them, but I think they should have given it a go, I really, I think they should have took the chance.

I've got my phone set up and everything, to film it, get a YouTube hit, I'm so silly, and a little drink, there you go, I tell you it's really weird, well it's not weird at all, I reckon if, you know, in the future, it came out that I was like a proper, proper raving alcoholic, and I was just drinking, and I was drunk all the time that I was making these recordings, I don't think anyone would be surprised, the fact is I'm not, but I don't think it would surprise anyone, I think it's like, oh,

that explains it, oh, now it all makes sense, yeah, I had that a bit from family and friends when I was diagnosed with bipolar, oh, that's why you're the way you are, we thought you were just being difficult, oh, yes, did you know, that I really, really love you, did you know, that when it snows, my eyes become wild in the light, that you shine in me, so, yeah, it's been a weird, it's been raining all the time, apart from when it's not raining, it's been really, it's been proper constant for a, seems like about

a week, had a lot of wind, had a lot of wind last week, I think, or the week before, I lose track, because it's not important to me, but the rain, that's the one weather that I struggle a little bit with, because I don't like getting wet, and if you could smell me right now, you'd know, that's why I never bathe, I don't like water, talking about water, Andre, those of you that have heard me talk about him and puddles and his complete, I do not, I don't know if it's a phobia, or it's a

hatred, or just, you know, maybe it's a mutual dislike, but he really doesn't like puddles, and he will avoid them, including in the pitch black, he will know where a puddle is and he will walk around it, but that might be because he can see in the dark, but you know, the fact that I can't see in the dark means that I cannot bend my imagination around the idea that another living being can see in the dark, because it does not register in my brain to be normal, how can something else see when I can't,

yeah, no, but he can, he can see, dear Jason, are you okay, you seem a bit strange today, yeah, yeah, so I took him in the park earlier, and it stopped raining, which was nice, and it goes a little bit against my saying, it's always been raining, raining, raining, but you know, it was still, it rained a little bit underneath the trees, and I was like, oh, I can't believe it's raining, every time I walk under a tree, Andre's raining, and Andre pointed out, no, it's because the leaves are covered in water, daddy, and it's,

you know, it's a bit windy, and also because you're so heavy and fat, whenever you walk past a tree, the tree wobbles, and the leaves bend over, and the water falls down, and I said, yeah, okay, but it rains, even when it's not been raining, it rains, he said, no, no, daddy, that's a different thing, it's because you're so big, heavy, and fat, that when you walk past, you're actually, you're crushing the roots of the tree, and the leaves are crying, and that's what it is, crying on you, I said, Andre, you're a ferret, you're

not on this planet to make fun of me, well, I kind of am, no, you're not, yeah, but it's so much fun, yeah, but I'm not here to entertain you, I am your guardian, you feed me, you give me water, and you clean up my poo, how complicated can that really be, how difficult, how mentally challenging can that be, on your brain, Andre, behave yourself, or we will not go out again, so that's it, he shut up, and we got to the, it's kind of like the entrance to the park, and there was, it's a

little bit of mud that he likes to dig in, he's only been digging in it really for the last couple of months, it's almost like he knows there's something under there that he wants to get to, but he's also really lazy, so he digs for a while, and then he just gives up, and he gets distracted by other things, well, today, or it was earlier this evening, that whole area was covered in water, one big puddle, in the mud, and he did the complete opposite to what he normally does, instead of avoiding it at all

costs, I mean, I've seen him try to fly over puddles, seriously, I see him straining, trying to create wings, he's like, I know you've got webbed feet, but it doesn't mean you're like one of those webbed monkeys, he said, exactly, that's what I was trying to do, that's what the monkeys do, they fly through the trees, he said, no, they don't fly through the trees, they are jumping from one tree, and they're landing on another tree, but it's lower down, it just looks like it's flying, it's just the same as if you were in a

parachute, or you just jumped out of a plane, you feel like you're flying, but you're actually dropping, it just feels like you're flying, he said, how do you know, you've never been in a plane, in a parachute, I said, I don't need to have actually done it, to understand and comprehend the process that's involved in such activities, he said, you've really been a bit of a knob today, dad, don't use language like that, Andre, yeah, but you're really just, I don't know what it is about you, I'm not liking it, I'm the boss, I'm the

daddy, who's a daddy, who's a daddy, well, you're not really my daddy, are you, yes, I am your daddy, well, where's your tail then, oh, God, I don't want to go through this again, Andre just, I forget what we're talking about, oh yeah, the puddle, the puddle, he's in a puddle, he actually walks into it, so that he can later on just get out on his own, he just put his paws into the water, tested it and just started putting his face underneath the water, and at one point, he was digging as well, and at

one point, his whole face was muddy, it was brilliant, I kind of wish I'd had my camera on me, but I didn't, so there you go, I'm not sure how good the picture would have been, because it's night time, there is a street light there, yeah, I don't know, but it's quite nice to see him do it, because it's the complete opposite to what he normally does, and I don't know what he was digging for, it's almost like he could smell, even through the water, he could smell something that he wanted, I genuinely don't know

what it is, I really don't, but he was looking, honestly, he had a snorkel on and everything, like, what on earth is he doing, but it was so nice to see it, and I reckon, if he did that more often, he might break his fear of whatever he's got going on about water, because he clearly was involved about the water there, and I've tried to tell him, you're born to swim, you are born, you are physically designed to swim, he's got webbed hands and webbed feet, and that's not for jumping between trees, like a flying

monkey, which isn't really flying, because it's landing lower down, on a tree lower down, just looks like flying, stop it, and you think you know everything, don't you, you're just making it up as you go along, just like all your hypnosis recordings, that's right, I've said it out loud, nobody else knows, but I know, you make it up as you go along, Andre, everybody knows that, it's not a secret, yeah, of course, everyone knows, see, it shut you up, didn't it, it kind of did, yeah, never mind, everything's made up, isn't it, really, kind of,

I like to think of it more as creativity, I like to think it more of mixing together various things to create something new, which is what inventors do, I like to think of it as having faith in my own unconscious to come up with the right words, the right phrases, the right tempo, the right attitude, the right feeling, in the moment, when making a hypnosis recording, I like to put faith in, in the knowledge that I've gained over the years from books, from training, from audios, from recordings, from experience, many years of experience, to be

able to just talk from the heart, are you aiming all that at me, dad, yeah, oh, sorry, I forgot to listen, oh, okay, that was a waste, no, it sounded good, I mean, if you like, I can listen back to it when you finish the recording, yeah, okay, that's nice, it'll be the first time, what, it'll be the first time that I've listened back to anything you've ever said, oh, okay, so you don't listen to the podcast, of course I don't, why would I listen to it, I don't know, because you're my biggest fan, because

I'm your idol, because you want to be like me, I can't even say that out loud, oh dear, can you imagine someone wanting to be like me, do Jason, you are my hero, I really think you're fantastic, I'd like to be just like you one day, no, you wouldn't, no, you wouldn't, you need to be like yourself, it's, I don't know if there's anyone I'd like to be like, I don't particularly want to be like me, but I'm kind of used to it though, I think it would be, I think having a personality is, or

you know, kind of if you're yourself, we spend so much time with ourselves, don't we, you get used to it, you kind of accommodate the, I don't know, for me, the weirdness, I don't notice it quite as much as perhaps I once did, but then again I'm not getting feedback, you know, I'm not getting people telling me that I'm weird and people telling me that I'm no good and I'm useless and I'm bleh, I don't have that anymore, so I decide for myself what I am and who I am, I judge for myself, I don't

know if I'd want to be someone else, I partly quite like being me, but I don't think I'd want to spend time with me, although I do spend 24 hours a day with me, but I don't know, yeah, I don't know, in short bits, in short spurts, in short spurts I'm brilliant to be around, sometimes, not always, but sometimes I can be a lot of fun, in very, very short spurts, maybe an hour, maybe 20 minutes, it depends, I mean, I can be annoying and I don't necessarily mean to be anymore, I used to do

them, well actually, I used to do it, I used to be annoying when I was a kid and I didn't mean to be, I used to make people laugh and I didn't mean to do that because I was just being truthful and I was just saying what I was thinking and I think when I got older I purposely did those things and I was purposely annoying and I purposely made people laugh, there's so many different ways of doing it, like in real life, I mean, just by purposely making mistakes, it's the equivalent of slapstick comedy

in some ways, you know, instead of falling over on a banana skin, I'd say something that was absurd but it sounded like I meant it and that's where people didn't realise that I was saying it on purpose, apart from when I wasn't, so I kind of took control of it a little bit because on one level I liked people laughing because, well, you know, some people like being around people that are sort of humorous or whatever but in the same way I didn't like people laughing at me, especially when I wasn't trying to make them

laugh, when I was just being serious or I was asking a question and it's all just giving my worldview on a specific subject that was being discussed maybe at that time and yeah, a lot of mocking, a lot of mocking over the years, a lot of mocking and I think I kind of decided I'm going to take control of this, so if they're going to laugh, they're going to laugh at what I want them to laugh at and if they want absurd I can really do absurd, if they want silly I can do silly, but

I think part of doing that is I wasn't myself anymore, I wasn't really being true to myself and I kind of knew who I was from a very early age, I was very, I would say I was quite aware of myself, I wasn't hugely aware of, I don't think I could really, I could never understand what other people were thinking of me, I never knew if someone liked me, I still kind of don't, you know, I think I never really felt loved, probably apart from my Nan, but that was more, it was a different kind

of thing, she never told me she loved me, but she showed it with just such a huge amount of kindness and you know, always from the age of, well I became really close to my Nan once I hit sort of 16, I was close, she was my Nan from the age of 7, which has always been my Nan, but I didn't really get to know her until I was about 7, and of course I still go around there and I see her all the time, see her a few times a week, all the way through

childhood, from 7 to 16, and, but I kind of shared her, you know, in a way, shared her, because she was there, my Grandad was there, my brothers were there, you know, so I wasn't on my own with her, and it's only really when I became, when I got 16, and my Step Mum moved away, I said to her, you don't have to move away, you know, you could just move to a different part of the town and just don't give me your address, and she said, yeah, but you might find it out from someone,

I said okay, and so she moved to a different part of the country, she wanted, I remember her saying, the main thing out of all of it, is she wanted to be happy, she wanted to start a new life, she wanted to be with someone that she felt was, because she had a new boyfriend and they ended up getting married, wanted to have children, because she had my little brother, but she wanted to have more children, she wanted to be happy, she wanted to be able to be herself and express herself, but more importantly, she

wanted to make sure that she could guarantee that she never bumped into me in the street, so she made sure, you know, by moving along my way, so you know, I wish her well, and that's a bit of an Adele moment, isn't it?

I wish you well, that song, never love someone like me, there is nothing in the world, look at me, I swear, wait a minute Adele, someone's split up with you, you do not wish him well, stop lying, and she's supposed to be like this really honest songwriter, no, it's lies, you don't wish him well, no one has ever split up with their partner, and wished them well, I'm sorry, it's never happened, it's probably someone thinking, no actually, I do, I've split up with my boyfriend, and I saw him with his new girlfriend, and I really

wished them well, that's what I thought when I first saw them, I thought, oh, good for him, good for him, he's replaced me, that's nice, yeah, yeah, sure, yeah, right, I wish you well, no you don't, stop lying, I remember I saw her ex-girlfriend in the street, and it was weird, she wasn't in the street, like out of the corner or anything, but she was, I don't know, honestly, I was, I thought she was helping people with their self-employment, I thought she was like a self-employment coach or something, that's when I walked past her, but

before I got to her, I heard her shouting out, you're looking for business darling, you're looking for business, that's enough about my mum, so I saw this ex-girlfriend, and basically my friend saw his friend in the street, but his friend happened to be with his girlfriend, and they were with her, she was with them, and it's really weird, she came up to me, because they were chatting, I felt a little bit awkward, of course I was wishing her well, in my mind, and she came up to me, she said, oh, I've got a boyfriend now,

I'm really happy, he's lovely, he's really nice to me, something like that, I wasn't really listening, but it's like, why are you telling me this, why are you talking to me, and I just laughed at her and walked away, and I don't know why, I didn't laugh at her, I just laughed and said, good luck, wish her well, and I had to just walk away, but she was almost really cocky, and, I'm doing so well now, it's like, why, why are you telling me, and, you know, admittedly, and to be fair, he is second best,

I'm the one you wanted, actually, no, she dumped me, that's it, I can't remember, I don't care, it don't matter, it don't matter, oh, I remember, I was dating her, right, and she got right up with me, really annoyed with me, because I'd started dating her, I think in November, October, November time, and then, in the January, you know, we were quite serious by then, serious, you know, we were, we were still dating, and I went away to London, I was doing a hypnosis course and training, you know, hypnosis, you know that thing that I'm

into, that I've been into for a while, and this is back in 2006, beginning of 2006, January, and she got right up with me, she was really annoyed, why are you spending all your time doing hypnosis courses, she didn't talk like that, I don't know why, I do a real voice, why are you doing all those hypnosis courses, I thought you wanted to be with me, and lovely voice, and I just said, well, this is what I do, this is what I do, I'm not, I don't know, it's almost as if she wanted me to

not do anything apart from work, go home to her, and she wanted to live with me, and I didn't, I didn't live with her, she gave a lot of hints that she wanted to live with me, that she wanted to move in with me, well, she wanted to get a place with me somewhere else, because the place she had was quite small, she wanted to do that, and she gave a lot of hints, and one day she said, I want to move in with you, and I said, yeah, we could have some dinner, we could

go and see a movie or something if you want, what do you fancy, she said, no, I want to live with you, I want to spend my life, building a life with you, we'll get a flat together, and then maybe we can, if we work hard, we can get a mortgage, and maybe have another kid, because you've got that one, that I've got, and you can have that one, laughing, OK, I'm back, I'm back, she didn't say, I've got that one, she didn't say that, so she's saying, I want to build a life with you,

and all that stuff, and I remember saying to her, I'll do that at the time, I better go, I've got to get back, because I've got a meditation at the centre tonight, and she's like, oh, she didn't, I just, you know, there's stuff to do, there's all so much work to do when it came to the hypnosis stuff, and I suppose because I wasn't trying to build a business, that's been a little bit difficult to explain to people that I've been with, or you know, or friends even, very hard for them to grasp the idea

that I was just trying to help people, I do not comprehend, it does not register.

What do you mean help people? But then there's that attitude that I think some people have towards even nurses or paramedics, well they're getting paid, aren't they? They're getting paid, it's their job to save lives, why should I feel grateful? Yeah, but that's not really how it works, is it? This is a human being.

Yeah, they're getting paid for it, innit? Yeah, okay, fair enough. Got that laughing to make me nose run. Oh dear.

Yeah, anyway, so, you know Jason, I listen to this to try and get to sleep, but when you start laughing loudly, it's very disruptive to my peacefulness. Yeah, well, I'm sorry, I do apologise, I do try and keep quiet, I try and keep it at the same level, I mean even if you listen regularly you know that, you know that I do, I try, and if there is any loud sounds or if I make a loud noise or whatever, I try and either edit it out or I kind of even it down a little bit. So, you know, I take off the edges so it's a little bit the same as the rest.

You know, I'm not, I don't intentionally cause disruption. Not normally, but sometimes it's the right thing to do. So, yeah, I can't remember what my point was there.

I wish him well. Oh, just waffling really. None of it makes sense, nothing's, none of this is important, don't take it all so seriously.

It's not so serious as a cow on a skateboard that doesn't know the right way to finish that sentence. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Tomorrow is Wednesday and I can't really see any difference there either.

I've got Andre though at least, that's good.

I might be up a lot of the night again making recordings. So I do this, I mean it's still Tuesday but Wednesday starts soon. So I might make a few recordings in the morning, like, you know, over the next few hours.

Or I might just go to bed, I don't know. It depends how I feel really. There's no, there's no guarantees really, you know.

I'm going to have to do, well I need to do the sleep hypnosis weekly, but I did it I think about three days ago. Yeah, I don't know what other recordings, I haven't done a bedtime story time, Jason's bedtime story time. The last one I did was I think about a week ago, so I could record another one of them.

I just don't know which ones to do. I prefer just to, I'd like to just be able to read, you know, a fairy tale. And then just, you know, make a few comments, a little bit of side notes and stuff as I go along.

That was kind of the plan. But in order for me to do that, I need to only read out of copyright books, public domain books. So if I adapt a story in my own words, then that's different.

So that's what I did in my last recording. It's a bit distracting, sort of changing stuff, because part of the fun of it was to make, well, to comment on the actual story itself. And the wording too.

So if I'm adding, yeah, if I'm adding my own wording, if I'm changing the wording and the dialogue, you know, it's, there's not really anything for me to comment on. Yeah, so it's a bit of an unusual situation. I mean, someone did ask me, why don't I just do my own stories? And I did do one, which was about Andre.

Oh, sniff, sniff. And it's just, I could, you know, I know I can. I mean, I've done it, but just, I like the idea, kind of like the idea of reading original, someone else's, you know, let them do the work.

And I can just make, kind of make fun of it a little bit. Just to do some silly voices and, you know, it's a little bit of fun. It's a nice little bedtime story.

However, I'll figure it out. I will figure it out. We'll all come together in the end.

So I've got a delivery of food coming, which is pretty nice. I haven't had a delivery for three weeks. You believe three whole weeks.

And it just seems weird because, you know, part of the reason, I think, but I know part of the reason why I like to be productive with making new recordings and stuff like that. Is because time really does fly by. I know it's a cliche, but it's really, really going quite quickly.

Three weeks since I last had a delivery. And I've been eating just. I like to eat sandwiches.

Or, you know, such like stuff. Just as well as a cooked dinner. If I can fucking think, you know, be bothered.

But I quite like to have the option of just having a sandwich. Ideally with some, you know, salad as well in it. Tomato and cucumber.

But. I haven't had anything like that for over two weeks. I seem to just be eating more and more breakfast cereal.

So I'm hoping that when I get my delivery. Notice that quietness. It just shows.

It shows that I don't need to really say anything. None of my sentences need endings. It's just pointless dribble.

Seriously. And be honest. Is your life going to benefit? Are you going to benefit in any way by hearing the end of that sentence? You're not, are you? Doesn't matter.

Doesn't matter. I can start talking about jellyfish and jelly babies. And flying ants.

What would it matter? Just a bunch of words. Just a bunch of words. And the meaning.

The meaning of those words is the meaning that you give those words. Don't you know? Yeah. Yeah.

Man. Yeah. So.

I started doing a relaxation hypnosis for stress podcast yesterday. No. Today.

I think it was today. And I had this whole idea of what I wanted to do, well it was a very vague idea, but there was an idea anyway, and I had it in my mind for a couple of days, and I sat down to do it, and because I was talking, and the build up to the exercise that I was going to do, I went into a completely different direction, and you may think, yeah well you do that all the time, but not when I'm doing hypnosis-y stuff, I generally try to, if I can, stick to what it is that I'm doing.

If it's a conversational session, like a proper, you know, no exercises, not really kind of hypnosis in a way, but me just talking and opening up about my own feelings and my own life experiences that may be related to the topic in hand, which is being discussed during that particular recording, in the hope that maybe the listener can relate to what I've said, and therefore kind of open up a little bit, open their mind, and wrap their mind around a particular idea that I may have suggested, which could be beneficial to that person's well-being, and

sometimes I'll just drift off, and I'll start talking about stuff, and I think, and it's all, it's kind of relevant, unlike here, but what I'm doing is, it's kind of relevant to what I'm doing, so I don't just start talking about flying monkeys and stuff like that, and other weird things.

I do have, I suppose it's, I don't know what the best way to explain it would be, like peripheral focus, so I'm still focused on what's going on, but I'm focusing on other stuff that's maybe connected in some way to what I've already been discussing, and it can seem like, maybe can seem like I'm drifting into a different topic altogether, but I'm pretty sure I always come back to the original subject generally. Well, yesterday, the subject was relief and anxiety and stress, so I did stick to that subject. However, the exercise, the original exercise that I was going to be doing did not occur.

I didn't do it. I did something completely different. I can't remember what it is I did.

Something, something, I don't remember. Oh yeah, tapping, burping the anxiety. So you know the way you burp a baby, so you burp in the anxiety, but because you can't tap on your own back unless you're, well, deformed I guess.

If you can tap your own back, then you've got, I mean it's nothing wrong with having arms sticking out of your back. I'm not, I'm not judging that. I'm just saying it's something that most people can't do without, but we're getting weird looks in public, and I'm getting put into a zoo or a circus.

So I was getting onto some talent TV show. I said, well, let's pat ourselves or tap on our chest instead. So that's what I did, and went just in a different direction to, it was still focused on exactly the same end result, I guess.

But I didn't know, even whilst introducing the recording, even whilst proceeding with the exercise that I was originally planning to develop, I guess. And something just, I changed, I said something which changed the way I was thinking, and therefore changed what I did next. Yeah, I don't, that's happened a few times.

But I would, even though, you know, I can, I can think on my feet as it were, I would prefer to be able to write stuff down, be prepared, be really, really prepared, and be really professional. In some ways, I prefer that. I'm making myself laugh again.

I can't say the word be professional without laughing. That's weird, isn't it? I would like to be able to be more structured, instead of just relying on my brain to provide the words that are necessary, you know, in the correct order, in order to facilitate that change that I am attempting to create within the listener. So yeah, it's, it'd be nice to have, have it all organised so that I don't even have to think about it at all.

But you know what, if I was sitting here reading a script, again, I always say this, I said it thousands of times, I'm not talking about this recording. I'm talking about the hypnosis stuff. If I had a script, I get so bored.

And I don't, and I would be, it wouldn't be genuine. I don't know if I'd be able to do it genuinely and talk genuinely. Because if I'd have written down saying, you, you know, you have all these abilities.

And, you know, you've helped so many people in your life. As a sort of sentence that I might say, which is true, actually, about everybody. And so you've helped so many people in your life that you might not even be aware of.

And you probably will never know about someone that you've affected positively during your lifetime. And the roll on effect from that, that positive energy that may have transformed their life, or maybe their child's life. You know, it's just a small thing could really snowball into a major life changing experience in a positive way for people.

So anyway, without all that stuff, I'm just saying, if I had that written down on a piece of paper, I don't know if I could present it in a with my own voice. I don't mean, well, you really have helped people. I mean, like that, what I mean is, I don't know if I'd be able to do it sincerely.

If I'm reading off a piece of paper, fine. You really have helped people a lot in your life. And think about it.

There have been, you have been responsible for creating a positive change in another person's thinking, just by a kind act, which you maybe weren't even aware that you were doing. And you might have said hello to somebody. And they may not have spoken to any one for a while.

And blah, blah, blah. And I don't know, you know, I might, I would get a little bit bored. And I think it might come across as if I'm just reading off a script.

But I do like to read script books. I do like to absorb that stuff and read it and learn it. I'm not just making everything up as I go along.

Well, generally not. I kind of hope for the best. I like to read it, learn this stuff over the last 22 years or whatever it's been.

I've been studying hypnosis and just hope that some of it, some of it is stuck. And some of it can be just that it's worked, you know, it's sort of, I'm not quite sure what means. But I do have to put a lot of faith and trust, I guess, belief as well in myself to come up with something worthwhile when I make a hypnosis session.

And maybe sometimes I do. It's hard to know. I always come up with something, but how useful is to others? How am I really going to know? I get some people tell me, you know, say thank you, or, you know, it's really useful.

Especially with the relaxation for stress and anxiety podcast. It's really growing. That's like the fastest growing podcast.

I get over 2000 downloads just from that podcast daily sometimes. You know, it's been averaging just below 2000 sometimes over. That's just from one podcast.

But I get very little feedback, which is okay. It is what it is. Yeah, I'm not, I'm not gonna lie and say that I'd hate to, hate to have lots of people tell me how, how useful what I do is, because I'd actually love that.

But I'm not going to beg for it. You know, I'm not going to keep asking people. And I really do on those, those podcasts.

I really say to people, please tell, tell me, tell me that I've done well. Tell me that I've done good. Please.

You know, I don't, I don't ask. So you know, we'll just see what happens. But you got to go by, that's why the stats are so important to me.

Because that's kind of all I've got. Now if the stats were going down, if I was like 2000 downloads a day, for the whole of my, you know, all my podcasts, then I you know, I would seriously doing something wrong. But it's going the right way.

It's going up, it's getting more, it's, you know, getting more, more downloads, more streams, more listens, whatever you want to call it. And yeah, I kind of don't know why. I don't know why.

So I'm going to leave you. And I'm going to molly off. So I should speak to you again soon.

Remember, remember to be kind to yourself, because you do deserve to be happy. Of course you do. So do something nice for yourself.

And I don't know why. I mean, it's personal, isn't it? What do you like to do? And if you don't know what you like to do, find out, find out things that you enjoy doing. That's one of the best things you can ever do in your life is find stuff that makes you happy.

Seriously, find stuff and it doesn't matter what it is, as long as it's not hurting other people. And generally I say it's not hurting yourself either. But you know what, even if it's hurting yourself, don't, I'd say don't.

But you know, you could say that going skiing is, you may injure yourself and stuff. So it might be dangerous or whatever. But if you love doing it, and you're an adult, and you've got, you know, choice, you can choose for yourself what you do.

Then you can make those decisions. Find stuff that you love doing, something that you enjoy doing. Anyway, that's my little lecture over.

I'm going to go back into my little box. Box isn't that, I say my box would have to be quite big. But now I'm talking about a box, because it decides for me to get into it.

If I was like, I don't live in a box. Anyway, I'm gonna go. Take care.

Lots of love. Bye. Why am I talking about boxes for?