Hello, and welcome to Jason newland.com. My name is Jason Newland, and this is relaxation, hypnosis for stress, anxiety, and panic attacks. Please only listen, when you can safely Close your eyes.
And please subscribe to this podcast. Now I'm gonna do something topical today. So in the future, when you listen to this, it will be the future one. But, you know, in years to come, it might not
be, you know, he might not kind of the first bit might not make sense due to what I'm referring to. But at the moment I'm gonna mention suicide bomb, not going to talk about suicide, because I mentioned a celebrity that just just died. And and basically, it's a TV celebrity. And now there's a lot of these lie hashtag now be coined. aimed at trying to what I've looked at is on Twitter, aimed at maybe getting people to think before they post horrible stuff online about each other, or towards each other or aimed at each other or aimed at other people. is cool clear, including the press. And the kind of things that they write about celebrities, by would say it's not just celebrities get a hard time by the press. Basically, any wonders written about and sort of in the local press as well. His other newspapers are not famously known for getting things right, to gain correct information. And I'll tell you a little bit about my knowledge of the press in a minute, maybe, but we've got just got me thinking because I have talked about being kind in previous recordings, and I've been ending my recordings on Remember to be kind to yourself. You know, we do that for quite a while. So I'm taking responsibility for that word kind. Yes, I invented it. Of course not. But it got me thinking, okay. Perhaps I should I talk about being kind to yourself. I haven't really talked about being kind to other people
might have, but perhaps I don't know, maybe it's worth looking at. worth looking at the results that can come from cruelty to others, or how it feels to someone to being cruel to us.
And I've seen I actually was in the newspaper in is completely on is unrelated really to the topic, but it is in a sort of vague way. I used to do stand up comedy in the 90s. But in my 90s in the 90s, you know, between 91 and 98. I was in London doing stand up comedy, or at least attempting to. And the one night This was a new Act night where comedians were just trying out new material and all this there. It was Downstairs of the king's head, in other ways is LinkedIn. I forget where it was. Anyway, I am, this reporter came up to me and said and to another comedian, and said we'd like to do an article on you. But to do, you know, a newspaper article on you. I said, I like okay. And I'm not sure if it was at that place. But basically, they said, Where are you going to be where we can film you? For I said, well, you can come come to this next gig and I might be in come back the next week, next Thursday evening. Anyway, the report came along to photographs of me and the other comedian. And yeah, really friendly, did a little interview of us individually and said, Oh, it'll be in it'll be in the it wasn't this was like, a proper wasn't a local newspaper was the independent, which was a national newspaper. And they said, and it was clear more highbrow as well. It wasn't tabloid, it was. biased to read it. I used to read the independent because it wasn't biased towards we didn't seem to be biased towards any political, like, far right, far left kind of ideology. Just I thought more factual, you know, just gave the news as it was. But more in depth than would be maybe in some of the other papers, the ones with pictures. And anyway, the newspaper article came out. And it was a double. Yeah, it was kind of like the middle. I think it was double spread. Not the whole double split, but there's a big picture of me. For some reason, it's a picture of me, in that it's black and white picture. I had long hair ponytail, no smoking a cigarette. Really cool picture, actually. But the headline was, me Britain's worst comedian. That was the headline. or meet me Britain's worst comic. It was something like that. It basically made it Britain's worst comedian. And in the article, they were reading they were the they wrote, they actually were the worst comedian Paul was referring to the other bloke. With me, though, is saying well is we don't know what he's saying. But the audience laughing and so my, because I used to be quiet. Rude, you know, with the comedy I did. So that was the reporter's words while saying what Jason's saying is horrible. But the audience are laughing and so my house his words. Yeah, the headline was meet Britain's worst comedian. And this was in 1993. And I'd spent three years getting to the point where I've started to be doing quite well.
I say well, you know, for me, I started to get a little bit of respect and started to get people wanting to give me money to perform on Yeah, I knew a few people but still starting to kind of get okay. thought to have some really good gigs and everything and then I became the laughingstock of the comedy circuit. Because of that newspaper article now started off being a laughingstock at the comedy circuit when I first and then you know, eventually I started to become okay pre. I don't use Word goodbye. Okay. So that ruined pretty much ruined my comedy career and my confidence. I never, I never recovered from it. I still kept going for a few years but intimately. I didn't put the same energy into it after that, for still performed into 9495 96 a little bit 97 but you know it. There's something about that, because people start gossiping about me, and being cruel about me and saying horrible things and mocking me, the other comedians in the club owners and stuff.
And the, we didn't have internet then. But if we had, have had Facebook and Twitter, I would have been ridiculed by the other people, the other comedians. And I wasn't a celebrity or famous or anything, but I was known on the circuit because of the kind of actor did because we're young, but I was very rude and very, either no
memorable, I suppose, for being wherever I was. But anyway, this is probably giving you too much information. I have a little bit of understanding a tiny, tiny, tiny little bit of understanding of how a newspaper can really cause harm. Or a newspaper article can really cause harm. And that caused me tremendous harm, emotionally, and my I wanted my career to be in comedy and we ended up not being wherever it might identify it could have been, but I really you know, I believed in myself until that and then you know, everything kind of went a bit no so great. Someone to be a celebrity to be famous. And to be in the internet era to be in you know, I've seen people on Facebook be so horrible to each other. Like fishes not not not even tournament celebrities, just normal people like me. You know, people just generally put in on Facebook via list most horrible things about their ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend, or things like that really personal stuff. Which is just I doesn't think doesn't seem right. So I come on here and I talk about my personal life by don't talk about other people's personal lives. I don't go into detail about my family. And I go into detail about friends because it's not my right to do that is their you know, their purse, I say our personal life, our tallgrass stuff that's evolved me but at the same time, who's got the right to talk about me in my life? I haven't got the right to talk about you. I'm got right so be cruel to you in public online. So it's, I don't know that's what kind of comes off in my head when I think about the kindness be kind hashtag be coined. And it's going around at the moment. And it's really not about the celebrity that died. That's kind of that was the trigger in the same as the me to movement, you know, the hashtag Me too. And it started off with, you know, a very famous extremely famous case in the news, and then it grew to where the general public were getting involved. So that's kind of what seems to be happening with this is a completely done as a different thing. I'm not comparing the two, but I'm just comparing it in the sense of the hashtag, the
the way it spreads. The message and the message seem to start out from the other celebrities, saying it It's disgusting the way that she was treated.
And basically, for those in other countries is a celebrity that she got into some kind of domestic issue with a boyfriend and her Christmas. And so she got arrested or whatever and went to court. A boyfriend didn't even want charges pressed. But then she was hounded by the press. She lost a job that she had on telly. And she was thinking she's been improved. She's been in programs that I don't really watch, like celebrity Come Dancing or celebrity. Yes, Strictly Come Dancing. So they have another name of it, which is the most popular television program in England. I don't think there is a more popular program and celebrity Come Dancing as kind of the top one, I think. And she won that, I think a couple of years ago. She used to host the X Factor. And after party thing, she used to be on children's TV. So she was a lot of things that I didn't actually get to see. So I don't really know her as a celebrity. So if if Simon Cowell, you know, I know Simon Cowell, or Dermot O'Leary, you know, it's those, there's some people that are kind of, clearly, you know, we have our own celebrities that we like that we, that we kind of maybe relate to what we see on telly regularly. And it's the same as like, for example, Steve Allen, is someone that listen to on radio, on LBC. If he were suddenly to die, I'd be devastated. Or Nick Szabo, who I listened to on LBC at the weekend, it'd be devastating because I'm used to hearing his voice by for those people. And almost feel like I know them, even though I don't really. But when you hear someone's voice every day, five, six days a week, for hours at a time, sometimes, or maybe just an hour at a time. It's just like, you feel like you know them, don't you? So, a lot of people have been affected by the celebrity that the lady that died. And so celebrity friends have come out and said we got to stop this. She was hounded and, you know, they've talked about their own experiences and and the be kind hashtag has come out. But it's starting to spread in a sense of, well, let's look at what not only what people say towards celebrities online. like Facebook, Twitter, also what you know, politicians is another people that get a really, really hard time. But generally people say I don't get a hard time on Twitter because I've got very few followers. And I think like 726 followers or something and hardly anybody even looks likes my posts when I put them on there I think to people regularly like my posts, Facebook have got a lot more people that are on, you know, on my on my Facebook page, but really ever get anything negative on there. never get anything really horrible. I say never occasionally birth rewear YouTube used to be the place I used to get occasionally really disgusting things posted on YouTube on my videos. sort of saying oh, you look like a serial killer. You look like a pedophile or you look those kinds of things like the kind of thing that you wouldn't say to my face. You wouldn't say to anybody's face cuz you know you're gonna get punched. Basically, you wouldn't just God saw us out or you look like a rapist because They're gonna hurt, you're gonna hit you on me.
So but on online, so Katie just type that in people thinks they feel safe to do it. And in my lifetime, I've never experienced anything like, this is the first time. You know, since the internet started, I mean, not even internet since Facebook, and YouTube. I didn't have a didn't feel this experience on MySpace, or any of the other places before Facebook, and YouTube. And I've seen on Twitter, there are three main places, I'm not on Instagram, and some of the other places could only do pictures and stuff. Some of the horrible things that people post is fictitious. It's really, and we all know, I don't want to have any issues like this. So be kind, I'm going to keep going back to the hashtag Be kind. So that can sort of recordings, at least a little bit since now makes a little bit of sense. Because you could say, All this has got to do with relaxation, or has got to do is stress and anxiety. And maybe, maybe it hasn't, but maybe it has. Because guaranteed the the people that end up killing themselves because they've been hounded online. Before they got to that point, they were under huge amounts of stress. You know, that's a stress, a stress level. That is, this is much as can be, can net as much as there can be. There's no highest stress level and someone that ends up doing something as terrible as that to themselves. So yeah, has got a lot to do stress. Because bullying isn't that you know, I actually had cyber bullying in the past. I had someone who found me on YouTube. It's happened a couple of times, because I've been on YouTube for a long time, different YouTube channels. And it was one person and they were hounding me. Every single video I put on and every old video they went to every single video and will post horrible messages. I even had someone see exchange people go had someone phone me because I was a therapist on you know, so they obviously got went online, found my telephone number and they phoned me up left a message so I woke up in the morning. Listen to this voicemail message and they trolled me and they were kind of mimicking me doing hypnosis recording.
of even had found a video where this woman made a video on YouTube recorded it named my name, but the title looks like she'd even started a new whole YouTube channel just to do this. And was sitting there slagging me off to a friend's talking about how I'm the worst thing on YouTube and how pathetic I am and all this. That's a lot of effort to go to is if I'm thinking What have I done? What did I personally do to her? then the answer is nothing. She lives in another country. The chances of me ever having met her is very, very slim. And I don't know I mean, could be an ex girlfriend, but I just wonder if I've even been that bad to deserve that kind of treatment. So So it's been weird and I, and I've had it light, I've had a very easy when it comes to this stuff, compared to a lot of other people know, comparing one person's problems or another person's problems isn't helpful at all lot of occasions, but on this one, I wasn't hugely affected, I'll be honest, it didn't affect me hugely, it was annoying. I did get upset with the person who was hounding me by I got into a routine of blood block, delete, block, delete. And I did that with every single person, that was rude. And eventually, people stopped doing it. So block, delete, block, delete. And I did that on YouTube, I did on Facebook. I used to have some messages on Facebook that were weird
in ISIS, but again, I don't anymore. And YouTube seems to have cleaned up a little bit.
might be wrong. But it seems to have calmed itself down a little bit compared to what it used to be like, with the iPhone, I think, also Facebook has, but I think that's because with Facebook, you have to actually put your name, you can't just you can't be anonymous on Facebook, we kind of can, but you can't, of course you can set up, you can get a random email address and, you know, do that way, but generally, you know, they're trying to get you to give you a telephone number. So you can, you know, make sure that you can keep your Facebook safe. And most people have pictures of themselves. And if someone doesn't have a picture on a Facebook page, then I assume they're not a real person. And they're not. I wouldn't be friends with someone that didn't have a picture. Of course, it doesn't have to be of them might be their children, or their grandparents or whatever. I've got Andre there's some people that leave it blank. Hello, be curious about people. So I never I never had anyone that wants to be friends that has zero picture. always had that role. But it's just a personal thing. Be kind, hashtag Be kind. My question would be why suddenly now, loads of people have been bullied, cyber bullied. It's been a huge topic for years and years years. However, maybe it's because what I don't know, because I'm thinking a celebrity being pushed into killing themselves or being pushed into ended up dead has happened many times over the years, you know, being pushed by the press hounded by the press. And so shahara wondering why what's kind of triggered now? Maybe, maybe it's because of the younger audience. Because love Ireland has a very young audience. So the person who just died was the presenter of that show. Until this year before just before December. So they've seen someone who they care about somebody they've grown up watching on television, being hounded by the press, and maybe being you know, trolled online. So now the younger generation is saying that's enough. No more. We're not we're not putting up with it anymore.
So maybe that's what's happened. Maybe that's why it's happening. Because the celebrities in the past maybe they didn't have the audience to this, this lady had this TV percent ahead. Maybe this is the audience that
actually is gonna say yeah, we're gonna do something about this. Be coined as the message that's been spread online, to be kind to Connor the old. I don't know if you ever heard anyone say this. But if you've got nothing nice to say don't say anything at all.
Of course, I mean, that's, that's no way to live your life as a mean, can't always have nice things to say. But it's quite a nice idea to not be horrible. And it's solid for the stack. It's not that hard. Is
it really, just to just to not be a normal? I don't think it's that complicated to be being a nice person. I personally don't think it is. I might be wrong, but I don't think it is. So being kind, I suppose. I suppose I'm spreading it from not just being kind to yourself, but being kind to others. treating others the way
that you treat yourself. So if you treat yourself kindly, then you're more likely to treat other people kindly. And it's not because it has to start with you.
Because, you know, there's the old saying, isn't there? The old cliche way, if you can't love yourself, you'll never love anyone else, which is complete bullshit. People love to say these old sayings. Like it means something, it doesn't mean anything. That's crap. There are people that hate themselves. But love the bones of dead children. I said the bones It sounds weird, isn't it as that is saying, up north. They love their parents or they love their children, or they love their pets. Love the little fairy, or the you know, the idea that someone has to love themselves in order to love someone else. No, it's not true. So if anyone says that to you, because people say that to me, you know. And I spent all my life I didn't I never loved myself. And to be told, or you can't love your grandmother, because you don't love yourself was basically what they were saying to me. That insight in those words. And I fought bollocks to that is not true. I absolutely, I hate myself at that time, by love my grandmother. So the idea is you can't love someone unless you love yourself. absolute crap. However, you probably going to feel the ability to be more loving towards other people. If you feel in love toward yourself,
it's more case if the love is moving freely. If it's not blocked, then maybe it can be reached out to more people
perhaps. And you can be kind to other people. Even if you're not being kind to yourself. Again, someone could be spent all day working in a hospice,
looking after people, helping people in the last hours of their life holding their hand doing all that stuff. And then going home and drinking themselves into a stupor full of self lovin. So again, the idea is you have to you have to have Be kind to yourself in order to be kind to someone else. No. But definitely helps. As definitely preferable. And I'll say to anyone, if you're helping someone if you work in a hospice, or do any kind of thing, anything like that. How could you not care about yourself? You're an amazing person. I mean, genuinely, I don't think anyone would be able to disagree with that. Anyone is spends all day helping someone like is that's a hero. So anyway, that's I don't even close that as an opinion. That's just the fact as a fact, someone that helps people, and we all help people at times,
but some people devote their whole life to it. You know, some people like a doctor, or nurse or firefighter, you know, whatever, paramedic Of course, they have their different reasons for doing it. Some people won't do it out of kindness, but it's still being coined.
They might not do our love, but they still will, compassion is still showing compassion. Some people won't be in the police force, because I want to help people,
they might want to be in it because they want to be in control when they want to be able to boss people around and feel important. But it's still going to be helping people, they're still going to be saving lives. Regardless of what their intention is, what the reason they're doing it for years. I've known nurses that have very little interest in the well being of people. Whether it's because they're jaded because of having done the job for too long.
It's not that they don't care, but they just kind of don't care anymore. You know, they don't have that passion. They're not not that interest.
And you can get that done, but they're still helping people. Um, if you're going to a doctor surgery, receptionists on a doctor surgery I've been to I've moved around quite a bit. And it seems to, I think, it seems, is some of the doctor's surgery. receptionists seem to go on a course, like the same course and how to talk down to the patients and be very impatient with the patients and almost in an uncaring way, which I don't understand. Because here's something I've noticed that a lot of people have said that to me as well. No one really gets it. Because one, one thing you need if you're going into a doctor's surgery, is kindness, compassion, like extra extra kindness. Just like a small child is going into a foster to foster parents. Maybe while you know, his mum's in hospital have after having a car accident is going to be in there for maybe six months. So the small child is being looked after by complete strangers. That little kid needs extra love. Not just regular love the extra extra extra more and more a high level of care and kindness. Which is what patients need when they go into the doctor's surgery. Because they might be there for an ingrown toenail. But they also might be going in there to get the results of a biopsy. Your eyes is the kindness. I don't want to get onto the bandwagon, bandwagon, the bandwagon of putting down society and people and all we're not is carry on as we used to be and society doesn't care about each other anymore, man. Amen. Because human beings are human beings. And there's lots of social issues, and social reasons why things maybe have changed. But I think humans have change. I don't think any less people would go to help someone. And there was in need as any other time in history. So there's a school near where I live. If that school was on fire during the day with the kids in there. No less amount of people would go to help, though with that one have done 20 years ago, or 100 years ago was 60 years ago. There wouldn't be people thinking I don't care there'd be no less care in our kindness. So you know in I think in inside us, we've got that kindness
it's there a two I noticed though a few years ago things it seemed as if being coined was almost like a disability to some people I think I've been judged more in some ways on the things I've done well being kind than the things I've done well being a complete ass
no one was come out to share his stay asleep. So I don't understand that you know, doing these recordings since 2006. I've been mocked by friends family I've just almost like I'm just stupid doing it. While I do that, why am I not charging? Why am I doing it for free? What's the point? I had one person Tell me Oh, no one appreciates things that are free. They want to value and so to be mocked and put down for doing something like this Yeah, this some of the same people would accept me if I went on a shoplifting spree of I stole a car and crashed into someone's house by accident, of course. So I'm not saying they'd be proud of me. This almost I apologize for the sound of them running around. Anyway, hashtag be coined. Hashtag be coined.
hashtag be tired. Oh. So what does that mean? And it seems I don't know. It seems kind of it seems strange though in 2020 that something like that's coming out you know, after all these years of existence or after all these years on the internet after all these years of newspaper harassments Press harassments tabloids and celebrities now suddenly. Perhaps we should be kind to each other is a great thing. But I just wonder why is it taking so long? for like a big group of people to come together and I mean it has happened you know, we've Buddhists and as a collective may be kind to each other Be kind to other people with a lot of different religions it's it's at the core of spirituality and religion is quite often to be kind to other people and be kind to each other. not always necessarily be kind to yourself. It depends on the religion, I
guess. So yeah, I just I can't quite get my head around, you know, in the sense of
I'm not a celebrity. I'm not famous or don't know what that would be like to be hounded. Although I did have a little taste of what it was like for someone else. Those those a lady who had dinner with in 1991 98 but he early, early January, February 98, I just remember it. And about three years earlier, she'd been in the newspapers, because she'd had an affair with a minister in the parliament, you know, an MP who was higher up, you know, a very famous MP where anyway, she'd you know, she'd sold the store to newspaper and made money out of it. But at the same time, they're about to leak it anyway. So she kind of tried to sort of cash in on our guess. But she was hounded. You know, a kind of backfired on her. And she was hounded to the point where I didn't realize I spoke to her about it. And she said she had to leave the country. She went and lived in Australia. So I'm sitting here with her. She's with her boyfriend.
And she was just so funny. She's absolute joy to talk to. She's really nice. And we're just having dinner in a comedy club. She's basically a friend of a friend of my friend gone, that kind of situation.
So she told me, you know, that she's gets hassle when she comes back to the UK. And she stayed away for ages because she was mistreated in public by by the public. So she knows she was saying to me how she'd had this hassle in the past as you went to the toilet, and she came back and she was all flustered. And she said, No, she's threatened by two women in Sawyer. Yeah, because of what happened in the past. They were like calling names and stuff. And then it's not funny, but it's really surreal. Probably about 10 minutes later, a group of lads that were stood up and started singing an anthem, because her story was connected to a football club. And they had the half football chance, and she was part of the football chart
at the time. And they started singing that football chant at the top of the voice. I just felt for now, this is before the internet. Again, and I'm just thinking, if the internet been around there, then
would she go for it? Which, you know, would she have crumbled? I don't mean
crumbled. Sounds like quite a weird term to snare. Almost like given up or something I'd say is not good term. But if she had to move to another country, the other side of the world to get away from it. Imagine what it would have been like with the internet. The horrible things that people have said to her, especially if they if they'd say that apps, go to her up to a face and say,
Wow, I was just honestly it was surreal, couldn't believe it wasn't wasn't my club, it kicked the blokes out and it kicked them all out.
But you know, it wasn't my club was my place to do that. But who I was it was very horrible. And she was really nice to the very young woman when it happened. And
regardless of anyone's moral standing, is you know, we all make mistakes. But she was punished proper, proper punished for that. And I can't get my head around the mentality of the people that were being vicious to her
with the kindness And I don't mean kindness, because kindness, I don't think it's about going up to somebody saying, or I love you when you don't, or I really like your work when you don't like their work. That's just being false. I think sometimes being kind is when you're thinking that said no bad that I don't like this unfunny on telly.
But not saying I think in app be cruel to say that. And who am I to judge him anyway? I don't know what he's really like. That's just what I've read about. I've read that he's, he does this every day in a newspaper. So kindness can sometimes be just not saying anything. I think just not typing those words into the keyboard.
Color celebrity, a horrible name, or wishing horrible things to happen to them. But I don't know how much has the I got a friend maybe there was those a few young lads and they were being rude to a
Chinese lady in the park. And I think that we're making fun of her being Chinese,
basically. Which is horrible. It's horrible. There's no no way around that. But the young lads though, probably like young teenagers. 14 something like that. acting stupid, trying to impress each other properly. Regardless of whether that's doesn't make it okay, but I'm saying that's that's what happened.
There wasn't any physical damage. And they did get in trouble. Because the police came and they did get in trouble for it.
Because she really hammered them. She started hitting them with a stick. So I was talking about it with my friend. And she said, I hope they burn in hell, I hope they get run over by a car hope they get cancer and I thought, wow. The officiousness that came out of her mouth. But didn't expect it to say nice things. I hope they get good job when they leave school. Or you know, I didn't expect that.
Although, you know, I hope they do to arrive in their life. So that they don't ever do that again. And they
realize that what they did was wrong. But there's that, that mentality that can kick in sometimes with some people, and I've done it myself in the past and do it really anymore. Because it was an automatic response. There was I think it was almost like medieval. Some kind of caveman response must kill everybody. That doesn't agree with me kind of weird kind of, you know, nonsensical, non thinking response. But I think we've used in your brain it can change things a bit. So I think maybe you know, kindness for her would have been to just noticed her saying nice things and realized how awful what she just said was that she didn't. She was focusing on the other person. So hashtag kindness. I suppose the thing with this is We all get this the catastrophizing isn't there, the thinking that everything's too much, and nothing's ever going to change, or it's going to get worse and worse, when in fact, everything does change.
That's kind of one of the universal truths is everything changes, it has to, there's no choice in that. And it's kind of both the best and the worst part of life, I would say.
Because when things are going brilliant, and then something changes, it's kind of the worst thing, possibly, at that time.
But you know, what, when things are going really, really bad. Knowing that things are going to actually improve, is the best thing in the world is worth remembering that cling on to it. So, you know, I understand how some people would want things never to change, because they want to manage to get into that little pocket of joy, of happiness and stay in there forever. Which is unrealistic. But you know, if you take the gamble, and except say, Okay, I want in life where everything stays the same forever. And you're unable to get into that little pocket of joy. You know, it's like a little game of golf, isn't it, if you can't get into the hole you won, first time, you might end up in a different hole
is then you stuck there. And our hole might be one of pain. bereavement of, you know, suffering, then you start thinking, Oh, my, perhaps I don't want this to last forever.
So you know, things changing all the time is a good thing. Just doesn't always feel like, especially when things are going really, really well.
But remembering the, when things aren't going so well. It's going to change. It has to there's no option. This is not an opinion. This is not a belief system. This is a universal fact. And you haven't got to believe
in God, believe it, for it to be true. You can go to bed tonight and it's dark. And when you wake up, at some point during the day, it's gonna become light.
You know, it depends what time of the year is the sun will be up in the sky. They felt the sun's up in the sky the whole time. That's a universal truth as well as it's always there.
So is the moon. It's just we don't see them. You know, certain times I may really to believe that things are never going to change is to believe is to have the child is going to have that really tiny child's mind set where they're in the bedroom, the turn the light off, and they believe
they think that all the stuff disappeared. You know, all their toys have disappeared. Their wardrobes disappeared. Even the beds disappeared that the ceiling the halls of dystopian The walls are disappeared, the floors disappeared, because they can't see it because the lights turned off. They turn the light on again, and everything reappears again. That would be that mentality of actually believe in that.
To believe in everything's disappeared when you turn the light off. Or a dog. When you go out a dog doesn't know if you're coming back.
Apparently dogs can't tell time. Not a mere don't have watches today, but they don't know if you come in back. That's why a lot of them make so much fuss, because they're not sure.
But as an adult, you don't have that mentality as an adult. The reality is, things are always changing as to reality, and that's the fact there's no opinions, no belief system needed. That's just fact. And I love that fact. And I don't like it at the same time. Sometimes, I really don't like it, you know, Bava times, the other day, I was sitting here, always felt stressed. I couldn't focus on anything, couldn't even watch television. felt hopeless for everything really, really crappy. But I knew somewhere in my head, that it was going to change. And I went to bed. And few hours later, or go to bed, and it changed. And it's just remembering that even if it means sticking a big sign on the wall, things will change. Who have a tattoo on your arm. Also, I'm not saying get a tattoo, that's totally up to you. That's pretty nice to tattoos to have, maybe. But something to remind you. To Be kind. It seems strange in a way that we need to be to, we need to be reminded to be kind. Clearly the people that are doing the hashtag, be kind, do believe that we need to remind people
I can understand we need to remind each other, we might remind people to be kind to themselves. Because I don't think that's a natural thing. It's almost something that maybe needs to be learned. But say being kind to other people is more of a natural, instinctive thing. You see someone struggling to get on a bus, the natural thing would be to help them. Even if you don't, you might have that inside your brain to help them.
I mean, I'll make myself really silly. A while back on the bus. Now the lady and she was in a wheelchair, electric, mechanical wheelchair. She was on the bus. She pressed the buzzer, she wanted to get off. And the bus driver got off the bus, put the ramp down. And she couldn't undo the belt. She had some kind of belt on which was attached to the bus. So I'm gonna seatbelt thing which I didn't know the head. And she said Can someone help me please?
I'm stuck because you couldn't undo it. And the bus driver said I can't I'm not I'm not allowed to touch you.
He was like put his arms up like that pants I'm not allowed to. I said the wrong thing by many in a nice way. I stood and said I don't mind touching you. And I just it sounded a bit weird saying it out loud like that. And people were laughing. But I was at the back of the bus and no one in the front or even in the middle, even seen got up. However, I do believe that a lot of those people wanted to help. But there's something about being coined is almost frowned upon. I thought it'd be quite some might get charged. I really believe that is the case. And sometimes it is the case. That's why I believe I might be wrong. It's just a theory. The perhaps something's changed in society. Or maybe it's always been like that, I don't know. But something that I've noticed that there seems to be less more of a reluctance to Step forward
and help. It always, always will be something it does. But it seems to be less. And whether that's fear, whether that's embarrassment, maybe I don't know. But ultimately, I do believe that most people do want to help.
And they are feeling kindness inside, towards the other person that needs help.
But something stopping him from doing it, of fear of helping others. So the hashtag Be kind, could be changed to hashtag. Don't be scared of being coined. And the fear of being coined. Hashtag what's stopping you from being coined? Hashtag, don't let anything stop you from being kind. Or could just be hashtag, notice. When you're feeling kindness towards another person. See, even if you don't do anything, and someone else does, then it's fine. You don't do that need to have done anything, because someone else has done it. So maybe you can feel good inside thinking, why did feel kindness and I did want to help. Maybe next time, I
will miss a few ideas. I still managed to waffle on for ages, I just suppose a little bit affected, not affected, but just interested in new the new energy that kind of comes out some of these
public traumatic events. And like, you know, a very popular celebrity passing away and how the public respond for you. So I've been saying be kind to yourself. And I've been that's kind of been part of my message for a long time. And I guess I don't focus as much on being kind to others. I think part, part of the reason is because I feel it doesn't feel right to tell other people what to do to other people in some ways, but I feel quite comfortable making suggestions for how you should treat yourself kindly. Maybe it's partly like a judgment, maybe I feel like I'm judging someone when I'm saying, Be kind to other people. But if I say and you could say well, I am cons of a people, Lord is a reason why I don't do.
You don't know me. However, if I say to be kind to yourself, there is no argument against that. Nothing you can say can argue against it.
Because it's important that you do it. Again, I come from a factual perspective. You need I need we all need to be kinder to ourselves. Whether you need to be kinder to other people, that's for you to decide
that you can take my word for it. You do deserve to be kinder to yourself. And that needs to be a lifelong practice. To find new ways to be kind to yourself and to keep it going
Because just being kind to yourself today is not enough. Just like having a bath today is fine for the day. It's Monday, but come Friday or Saturday, they aren't going to be proper stinky. I'm going to need, you know, I'm gonna need a buffer for them. But I'm just saying, if that was the only barf I had for the whole week it's only it's only good for really a day. And I'll start to smell really pommy just like being kind to yourself once a week is not enough every day and I'm not talking about all day every day. Because you know, we need to get realistic here.
If you could be kind to yourself all day every day brilliant. doing it for a short period every day doing something nice. it sinks in because what you do consciously, purposefully then becomes unconscious and automatic behavior. So hashtag be coined. And that's the end of this recording. So realize again have waffled on, gone in various different directions.
Follow, we're angry with my favorite run around. managed to put them into the bedroom. So he's scratching at the door that was robbing today's hyper radius. So I'm going to go Thank you for listening. And ended with what I've been talking about. Remember to be kind to yourself. And you do deserve to be happy. Sometimes a sign I feel like you're more just say this for the sake of there is just another soundbite emoji slot. You deserve to be happy meaning like, you know, be do and I've explained why in the past. So I won't go into it again. But you do deserve to be happy. And being kind to yourself is compulsory. Sorry. It's not up for conversation. Although how we'll keep talking about it is compulsory, something you need to do is important as even going to the toilet and breathe in for your mental well being. So, thank you for listening. Take a cell and I shall speak to you very soon. Lots of love bye
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