#91 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks - "IS IT TRUE" - (Jason Newland) (6th February 2020)

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Hello, welcome to relaxation, hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. My name is Jason Newland. Please only listen to this when you can safely Close your eyes. And please subscribe to this podcast. I would just like to before I start this recording, to thank you for to everyone that listens to it. Because it's now become one of my most listened to podcasts. So I've got the let me bore you to sleep, deep sleep, whisper hypnosis, sleep hypnosis weekly. And a couple of Insomnia, Sleep podcasts to have all my sleep stuff on. But on a daily basis, this is now the most popular podcast and had over 1000 downloads yesterday. So thank you for listening. So what I'm going to do, I feel inspired or feel inspired to talk about this particular subject. The first thing is, well, the fear I'm going to focus on is this.
Don't believe what you think? Or don't believe everything you think
they might see. might seem like an obvious thing. Andre stop running around. He just does whenever I start recording Andre mallow Farah starts running around. Don't believe every thing you think it's quite an obvious thing to say. It's not quite so obvious to do. So for me, that would be a case of question in question the things that you think to yourself. And I know this, you know, I try and focus on the stress, anxiety Patino part of things. But just for general, well being this can transform your life, to start questioning yourself, just in the same way as perhaps we'd like to question other people with their beliefs, but perhaps we don't. Because it's not it's just not the done thing. Maybe you're maybe don't want to be rude or you know, someone says something, and you know, you think you want about, you clearly lie in or make it up or exaggerating, or a bit delusional, or you're just regurgitating something you've heard before for someone else, and never questioned it. And we can all do that. We're all able to do that. I've done it loads and loads probably still do. However, if we start questioning itself, not a judging way. Because if we're constantly questioning someone, what do you mean by that? Is that true? And it could seem a bit, both very judgy. We're gonna do it in a kind, gentle way. So not in a harsh way. Not in what do you mean by that? Explain yourself. Not in that kind of tone. But more. Is that true? Is it? Is it really true? So I'll reel off a few things that I say to myself. I'm lovable. I'm unlovable. Is that true? Really, is it really true? Well, I have had people love me and expose you nice, not. Yeah. So maybe it's not true. You could you know, you could ask another question. What you getting out of saying that to yourself?
What's the best benefit of being cruel to yourself. Because if you set it someone else you're lovable you are. You're unlovable is a horrible thing to say, isn't it? It's not. It's not even a mile. It's not even mild. mean that's worse than the worst swear words.
You can call someone the C word. But to say that someone's unlovable. That's that's leagues worse than the C word. Even though people love to say, I don't like that word, the C word. Don't like it. You're not supposed to like it was called a swear word. But there's so much and saying it's someone else be saying it's yourself. Which kind of brings us back to something I said recently? Yeah. Would you say that to a small child? The question here is, would you say to anyone? So it was someone who calls himself ugly? Would you say that to another person? You know, provide new, not a teenager, full of anger, and hormones and find it difficult to control what you say and do for a short period of time in your life. Outside of that kind of weird state and weird stage in your life. We've heard you say to someone, oh, you're ugly. And if you did, you'd know it was cruel. Because one of the cruelest things you can say to someone? I mean, this is cruel, horrible, horrible things to say to someone, or you're ugly, you're unlovable.
Although I'm not loving Andre right now, with all the noise he's making. So why are you saying it to yourself? Why is it acceptable? So the question is, is it true? First of all? So I would say I'm ugly. Is it true?
Well,
something people might think I am. But some people might not. So to say something like, I'm ugly, is a universal fact, the way you saying it is? I'm like, Well, no, it's not a universal fact. It's not. It's not really factual. effect would be saying, if you've got one leg, and I've only got one leg, I'm five foot eight. I'm five foot eight. You know, that's the fact. Or, you know, I wear glasses. Why do you know those are facts? I don't have to wear glasses. Unless of course, I want to be able to see properly. But you know, those These are facts. But it's not an insult. If it's a fact.
Someone says to me, oh, Jason, you got a beer belly. Yeah. It's not an insult. How can it be an insult if it's a fact?
Watch not really a beard, but because I don't drink beard. It looks like a beard belly. just happens to be really muscular. That's just the way my muscles are shaped. So what is it you're saying to yourself? That's actually harming you. This causing suffering within your own mind. Which is hurting? cruel. Let's just use let's say as it is cruelty. How you being cruel to yourself. So before you get to the point of like, Why are you saying that?
Is it true to start with? Is it true? I'm unlovable. Is that true? I'm always going to be anxious forever and ever and ever.
Is that true? There's no way of knowing I had to move to a different room afraid.
Due to Andre what happens when I make recordings through the day? is following me now. We don't have to be unconscious to listen to this anyway.
So having him running around is fine. He can be part of the recording. He likes to participate.
You know what's weird, is I don't say horrible things to him. He's a ferret is a pharaoh. He doesn't understand what I'm saying. But I don't say horrible things.
Usually, but not definitely nothing horrible, horrible. Because it just feels cruel. And I don't want to be cruel to him. I don't want to be cruel to myself.
So coming back to you. What kinds of things do you say to yourself? bearing in mind, you know, the average person's awake for let's say 16 hours a day.
You know, someone sleeps for eight hours. I know. There's some people sleep for a lot longer. And I'm one of them. But it's still a lot of time every day. were we thinking?
And what do you say to yourself? What thoughts do you have that you're ignoring are actually harming you. Because although consciously, you're not maybe taking much notice. your unconscious mind is listening all the time. So that's that's a little secret of hypnosis is you don't have to be in a trance. In order for suggestions, positive suggestions to sink in. Because your unconscious mind is always listening. And the biggest hypnotist the most successful hypnotist you will ever know in your life is you
the person that has the most impact on your unconscious mind? issue. Things that you say? The things that you think affects your life effects, your brain effects, the development of your brain. And some people might think would you mean development? My brain was developed by the age of three or Well, no wasn't our brains continuing to develop? Our brains are elastic, or plasticity they call it continually changing and growing and healing. brain damage can heal. People who have had strokes can heal. People that have had brain injury due to playing sports or accidents. They can heal that part of the brain. drug addiction, alcohol issues, it can heal that part of the brain physically heal it which then changes The way that we behave, and the way that we think, the way that we act, the way that we feel, probably more importantly, the way that we feel. Because you feel happier. Because the brain is healing. And that's what these recordings are about. It's about healing the brain, sending that message, that positive message to your unconscious mind, to heal your brain. So if there's gaps holes in your brain, to heal them, fill them in and heal over
and make more connections. Which can only happen unconsciously. The more you think about wanting it to happen, the more it's going to happen. So the more attention you give, to thinking about your mind healing, so that you no longer have those anxiety, extreme anxiety situations.
So that you no longer worry about things that you don't need to worry about. So do you feel physically? Well, so you, you notice that actually, you're more positive in your Outlook, as far as the things you're saying to yourself.
Because we can act positive. And we can be positive. Being positive is how you're thinking can pretend to be positive. But if inside your mind, you're just basically having a go yourself all the time and being rude and cruel to yourself, in your own mind. Regardless of how nice you are to everyone outside, you're not positive, you're not being positive or to yourself, you're being kind to other people. And doing that should have quite a big effect on your own mental state anyway, we will have an effect. So if you don't, if you spent all your time being clients over people, chances are you'll be kinder to yourself, because you'll get used to that way of thinking. But there are people that spend all the time looking after others, and spend no time looking after themselves. And get ill because of it. I've known people like that. And you may do as well, you may be someone like that. There's lots of doctors and people working in the health profession that get radio because they spend all their time helping others. And it's just too much for them. They're not able to put any energy into their own wellbeing. Or they just run out of energy because they've used it or helping others. I'm not saying I'm not saying stop helping other people. Of course I'm not because I think that's the greatest thing you can do. You also have to give love to yourself. And I'm not going to say you got to love yourself. I mean you do but I'm not going to sort of force that you can't force it. Because show love to yourself. And the best way is be by being kind. being kind to yourself. And sometimes it's as simple as stopping being cruel. Stop being cruel to yourself, is a very kind thing to do. So even if you can't think of anything kind to do, you know you like the idea. Be kind to yourself sounds nice, nice little sound bite. It's almost like a cliche or some, you know, be kind to yourself, man, man. But actually, if you reverse it, flip Put on his side and say, will actually reduce the amount of times that you are rude and cruel to yourself with your thinking and go for physical body image, I could look in a mirror. And even without taking my clothes off, I could look in the mirror. Okay, well, I got a big nose, I got big belly can't kind of sticky out is wearing glasses under colder now spy on I suppose on 49. And we're supposed to look like I'm 20. You know, but I can pull myself apart and just focus on all the things I don't like about how I look. The question is, when the question is, are these things true? That I would say? But also what use? Is it? What possible use could there be of looking in a mirror and tearing yourself apart? And criticizing yourself? What use in the world could that be other than harm? When that is self harm. And self harm is classed as you know, people that physically hurt themselves. But what are people that emotionally hurt themselves, which is a much higher level, a much higher number of people do that than to physically do.
In fact, I'd say everybody is emotionally hurt themselves. And had, you know, caused self harm. So everybody has that say, at some point.
Because no one else can see it. There's no scars, there's no physical signs. But you know, your unconscious mind is listening to that. Part of you the looks after the healing aspect of your body and your mind. The part that gives you what you want. It's almost you know, you got the you know, asking the universe for something, the law of attraction, stuff like that. It's your unconscious mind, that gives you what you want. Because you ask your unconscious mind, keep telling yourself over and over focusing on what you do want. And you start to do things that help you to get it
because you need to start taking action. Now it's taken me since 2006, to get to where I am with these recordings taken a long time. But I'd have no listeners if I didn't make recordings. If I didn't at least do something and have some belief, some self belief. And it grows a little bit of self belief then grows into more self belief. Saying something kind to yourself, leads to you saying something a bit kinder to yourself. Because you know if someone says something to you nice, yeah, say something nice to someone that you believe is someone that you know, is not just saying it for the sake of it. You know, so if you're getting ready to go out for the night, and someone says, Oh, you look so beautiful. And all your friends are saying and they just sign it. And you know, it's that kind of war sainik we want the other person to say to us and it might not be the case but
moving away from that false kinds of false II stuff. But when someone says to As you're really good at that, I'm really impressed with what you did is amazing.
It could be something you've created, it could be sciences, or you got really, you've got really nice voice. You might be singing. I could be saying, I mean, someone says you got a really nice figure.
And, or your hair looks nice. Even though these are superficial things, it's nice to hear, isn't it? If you know it's real, if you know it's genuine.
You know, I had a friend, I think I'd ever hear car or buy a new jumper or something like that, you know, and she say, we look 20 years younger. And I just laugh, because it's just ridiculous. I don't look 20 years younger, haven't had a shave and have my hair as silly. And I'll make fun of her. Because that's what she was used to doing. She was used to paying people false compliments. And, yeah, probably did look a little bit better. And maybe I did look a little bit younger. But you know, not 20 years, or you look like you're five years old now. Wow. You look like you in the womb, that hair cut really suits, you know. So, if you've got that kind of false stuff, that's, that's okay. But you know, it's just, but then how do you know which is false, and which isn't? It doesn't really matter. I mean, the point of this is, when someone says something to you, that's nice. And you take it for what it means you take it for being a nice compliment.
And it feels lovely, doesn't it? There's that sense of feeling valued. There's a sense of, I don't know, just come for a sort of joyful wellbeing, sort of in your body and in your mind.
And then if you have those kind of thoughts to yourself, in your own mind, you're going to get the same kind of feelings. So if you're surrounded by people telling you how amazing you are all the time, you start to believe it. And you start to say it to yourself, and you really believe it is a lot of very famous people. Whatever, I've met quite a few people over the years that really believed that they were amazing. And some would say delusional but you know, they believed that they were I've met people actually believe they were perfect. You know, I've met people that believed that they were always right. I think we must have all met people like that. But they believed and they were kind of happy with that.
If you pull up from a baby told that you were perfect, in every single way to you, the most intelligent child on the planet. And all these things dislike that Everything about you is perfect.
You're going to believe it. And you're going to be saying that stuff to yourself.
And you probably gonna feel quite happy. Of course, you know, you'd have to keep away from reality. Because then you'd have a little bit challenging when she saw me in humans, other humans and realizing that perfection doesn't exist.
So what is it that you say to yourself, that is harmful, and you may not be aware of it. You might not know what it is what's harmful and what's not. So work out What is it you say to yourself that is cruel, and unkind? And it might mean thinking, well, would I say that to another person? Or if someone said that to me
is someone said that to you? Would you take offense to someone says to me, Sir, my face, you rolled and you're going to, you're old, you're gonna die alone.
horrible thing to say, horrible, horrible, mean cruel, disgusting thing to say to someone by say stuff like that to myself. While I catch myself, I catch myself saying things like that to myself. And you know, I try and work with.
And I'm aware of it. Imagine if you're not aware of it. And you're just thinking it. Because of stuff you're not consciously aware of. That stuff that can get through to your unconscious mind really easily.
If you think of your conscious mind as being like the door, the security the door staff on a nightclub. So the unconscious mind is the nightclub it's not really a nightclub, but you know, but then you've got the security, your conscious mind is the security and decides what goes in and out of that. The unconscious mind. Now, if your unconscious mind is not even noticing, when you're being cruel to yourself, maybe because it happens so often we get used to it, we don't even notice it anymore. That stuff's gonna go into the unconscious mind, your unconscious mind takes it as a command as acceptable. And pause possibly. As a request, please kind of have more of this. This is true. Because the unconscious mind does not know how to tell the difference between what's real and what isn't real. What's true, what's untrue, doesn't question it believes you. It's gullible. It believes you. Why shouldn't it believe you? It's you your unconscious mind issue. And your conscious mind issue? Why should your unconscious mind doubt you? So you give these suggestions to your unconscious mind by thinking but when you consciously notice what you think in any challenger, for example, trying to think of something bad to say about myself, I want to do about myself rather than about you. You're not I mean, the one that sort of aim at myself during the recording. We've all got examples of these. So yeah, I can think sometimes no one. No one appreciates what I do. I sometimes think that no one appreciates what I do. Like the recordings and stuff, because I've got family members that don't. Most of the people in my life are not interested in this stuff that I do. So I get that in my mind. Sometimes no one cares about what I do. Non appreciated or valued. So a question. Well, if that's the case, why 1000s of people listening every day? It's kind of a question, and I call it alternate. So is it true? That's the first question, is it true? And in order for me to get the answer to whether it's true or not, I have to kind of focus in on it and examine, examine what you said to yourself. And when you examine something, you're almost dissecting it. And anything you dissect is no longer. It doesn't work anymore. Doesn't matter what it is you take anything apart. Whether it's a living organism, or a mechanical machine, mechanical machine. Watch an iPhone, it doesn't matter, once you take it apart, it doesn't work is no longer able to function. So if you take an iPhone screen off, take the bits out, you know what you tie a television, obviously unplug it. But if you were to take the screen off the television and take bits out of the back, it's not going to work anymore.
And the same is with thoughts. And their idea of Oh, no one, no one appreciates what I do by focusing on that. And by dissecting it by question, each part of that statement and get an examples that actually go against that belief that disprove that belief. The belief just crumbles and it no longer functions. And not only can it not slip into your unconscious mind, it can't even stay in your conscious mind because it's almost ridiculous. That's quite nice. As part of the as part of the reason why when I have nice thoughts about myself, I don't necessarily examine them. I just quite like having them suffer, I'm thinking to myself, Oh, I'm reaching 1000s of people and they are must you know this, this summer? Listen to me, pretty much every every second of every day around the world somewhere. This You know, this someone listen to my voice. It's not necessarily a good thing. But I'm just saying this. And I'll feel I feel quite nice about that. That I've reached a wide audience worldwide audience. But I don't evaluate it. I don't start sticking a microscope on there. Because I don't want to break up now. I do. I'm happy with that idea. Because it feels nice. whether it's true or not, is regard you know, as regardless because it feels nice. It might be true. But there might not be someone listening every second of the day. There's enough downloads for that to be the case, but I don't know, in reality, but it feels nice to think that feels nice to think that people are benefiting from what I do. So why would I examine it? If anything? Increase in that feeling would seem like more a more beneficial thing to do. So don't question those thoughts. Because it's not
cool.
Want to focus on question and then the crawl thoughts the harmful thoughts? Is it true? as the first question so when you have something when you've stopped listening to this and you start to kind of notice your thoughts when something comes into your mind, it might be you might it might be a case this happens to me he's had to before I've cooked something or meat in thinking this is disgusting. Is this true? Yeah. Is this not a you know, I don't mind It's fine. Is this isn't very pleasant to cook food I've just cooked there's not disgusting, but it's not a you know, sort of okay. It's not nice, but it's edible.
I'm a terrible cook. Is that true? I'm useless at cooking. And is remember the use of the word I'm useless.
So again, that's not something Do you want to be sliding into your unconscious mind? Not suddenly you want to be believed? Well actually, I'm not useless for cooking. There are some things I can cook quite well. But I'm not a cook. I'm not. I'm not a
Yeah, I'm not a an accomplished cook. And I'm okay with that. So don't want to be
question. No, it's not true. It's true to the foods of rubbish. Fine. But on the same side if I'd cooked for someone else, and they said, This is disgusting, you're useless cook.
Now that would be horrible. I imagined I my verbal response probably wouldn't be very kind back to the person but I yes, I actually hear it out loud. Having someone else say it to me. The first part feels worse than when I said it to myself. The first part of this is disgusting. Because before I was rationalizing, thinking, it's disgusting in this while actually hearing it out loud from somebody else, or imagining someone else saying it feels quite horrible you're useless Kirk. For some reason the this is disgusting. Seems to be a more of a jolt to me personally. When I say that to someone else someone's cooked me dinner. I want to first date your something you imagined that I see as all this is discussed in your useless cook.
Not something I would ever say. Not even as a joke. You know, this is it's cruel isn't is actually quite horrible. as harsh as it sounds is this is a lot harsher
than when I said it inside my own mind. So maybe that's not why is why we don't notice it so much. Because doesn't feel as harsh when we say no mind. But it is just as harsh if that is more harsh. more harmful. Way more harmful? Well, I says no interest in. So maybe that's why we do it. Maybe that's why we do are able to be cruel to ourselves. Because it doesn't seem cruel. Maybe because it's not out loud. The perhaps even the the terminology the the tone of voice isn't there. The Angry expression or you know, on the other person's face, isn't there. So almost like slides in is like unnoticeable or perhaps because we're just used to that we're so used to thinking I'm old fat, unlovable. Maybe that's just doesn't I guess if you say something enough. I used to get told when I was a kid that I was stupid, but probably like an idiot rule stupid over and over again for years and years and years. And I say to myself, and I got used to it and it didn't jolt me at all. I just accepted it. It was just what I was told is what I knew to be true. Yeah, it wasn't true. But it didn't seem bad. Saying it to myself. It didn't. It didn't Jami it didn't, I didn't feel like it affected me. But it did affect me. Because I believed that some of my behavior actually almost proved the statement. Some of the things I did some things I said, I not be happy to tell people I was stupid. I was willing to take low paid work, doing really menial jobs, which took no mental capacity whatsoever. Because I didn't believe that I was capable of doing anything that required thinking by could have done, I just didn't believe it, I didn't believe in myself. Those times are gone, things have changed. Takes a lot, change that stuff. And I still find myself didn't call myself an idiot. call myself clumsy calling myself this and that. Or maybe you also find yourself noticing it more. Because if nothing else comes from this recording, you start to notice it more, doesn't mean it's happening more, just means you're noticing it more. So you could come away from this and start noticing and thinking, why the name used to think about this. And now. Now saying these things to myself must be Jason's fault. Because in so listen to that recording. Um, you know, I'm saying these horrible things to myself. No, it's not that at all. You're just noticing it. And now you're noticing it. You can question it. And it won't go into your unconscious mind. That security, you can be your own security and say net, you know, coming in, because the things you're thinking is bullshit. Not true. Or is it true? Am I what I'm saying to myself? Where's the proof? Where's the evidence? And also, there's those statements. I'm always I always do this, I'm always
this. And people say that in arguments, and they you always do this, you do this to me, you make me feel this. I think we all know inside, that nobody can make us feel anything. But sometimes it needs explaining. But nobody can make you feel anything. You make me feel upset. No, your natural reaction is to feel upset, because what's happened? They didn't make you have an emotional response. Your emotional response is a response to their actions. But yeah, you start to notice things. And that's what happens in meditation, you start to notice the thoughts. And some people think that they're doing it wrong. Because when they start doing meditation, they might be sitting there feeling calm. The more they do the meditation, the more thoughts they start to notice. And some people will say, I'm getting worse. And then they're told now you you're improving. Because you're noticing more those thoughts
and letting them go. you're noticing them. And you can question any of those cruel thoughts you have? Is it true? And then you could say, well, how is this helpful?
Because on another side is like if someone's four foot six, you know, just under five foot wherever. If they constantly tell themselves unsure, unsure, I'm sure. Yeah, they are sure that's a fact. But what use is it keep telling themselves that is the one seven foot tall. I'm really tall, I'm really tall. What use is telling themselves are beating themselves up about something that they could do nothing about. Sometimes even the truth doesn't need to keep being repeated, if it's of no use.
But when it comes to some of the positive truths, the fact that you've helped people in your life, the fact that you are valuable, the fact that you do deserve to be happy.
Things like that you can focus on focus on the things that you are grateful for, or genuinely grateful for. I mean, I'm not grateful for my lungs. Apart from when I run for a bus, that's what I'm grateful for my lungs. I'm not grateful for my taste buds, until I something really tasty. I'm not grateful for my bum. Until I do a poo. Or maybe I've got constipation or got bad stomach, and it's gone, then I'm, I'm grateful for that process for the
whole bowel process. So this is things we can be grateful for. without actually going through the process of using those things.
If you want to, if you want to get into that mindset, of Actually, I love my bed. I'm grateful that I've got that bed. How much time do I spend feeling grateful for the bed,
very little. But it's a nice bed. I'm grateful for having the bracket, the holes on the television is just really cool, you know, wasn't expensive, 20 pounds or something and it's just raised on the walls. So the floors clear, makes the room bigger.
It's just the little things. Doesn't have to be big things. But what it does is shapes your mind. It almost
it directs the flow of the river of thoughts going in a positive, positive direction. So that's, that's the end of this recording. have done this. During the day, I don't normally you normally do at night. So the beginning I had Andre running around. So I've managed to stick him in the bedroom and close the door behind him as he followed me come into the living room. And it's been fairly quiet for the last half an hour or so. So when you have a thought in your mind, that's harmful, negative or problematic. Or just crow just in noticed, you're going to notice more when you're being cruel to yourself. And just ask Is this true? It is a genuinely true. And even if you come to the conclusion that is true, because that's the way your minds thinking at the moment might not be true. But that might be your stay in mind in that moment. Is it helpful? How is it helping you? Is it true? And how is it helping you? And chances are well how can it be helping you? The only thing that knee thinking oh unfair, every time I look in a mirror could help me to maybe want to lose some weight and to get fitter. Sue could help in that way. But I don't need the negativity. I don't need that cruelty. And if I wanted someone to lose weight, I wouldn't say to them, you're fat. because it'd be horrible, horrible thing to say to someone. I would word it a lot differently. And I would aim, you know, focus on the benefits of getting healthy. Maybe tell the person I want them to stick around for longer and I'll be worried about their health or you know, whatever. So notice when you're being cruel to yourself, ask yourself Is it true? These things that you're saying? And if not, you notice they just dissolve. The thoughts will just dissolve. Dissolve. Now I'm going to go Thank you for listening. Remember to be kind to yourself because you do deserve to be happy and I'll speak to you tomorrow. Lots of love bye

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