#60 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks (Jason Newland) (4th October 2019)

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Hello, and welcome to relaxation, hypnosis for stress, anxiety and panic attacks. My name is Jason Newland. Our website is Jason Newland, calm. Please only listen to this when you can safely Close your eyes. So if you like why do please visit my website, you can leave a testimonial.
telling other people, you know how you benefit. You can leave comments. All of my recordings are on the website, or organized by
category and all that stuff. And there's about 1087 or something like that recordings, including, of course, all of these sessions as well. And if you wanted to send me a gift, via PayPal or anything like that, it's also much appreciated. So this recording, has been inspired by an audio book that I was listening to earlier today. And it's the book is about positive psychology, which is a subject that I've been studying lately. I'm very interested in it, hoping to do a master's degree in the subject, as well as listening to the audio, but to be fair, it's easier than reading a light to listen to audio books. of all, I suppose. Maybe like you I like to listen, I get something different. I'd like to read as well. But sometimes it's nice to listen. And although I do say and listen, you can safely Close your eyes. When I listen to audio books, quite often on might be on a computer and doing other stuff. And sometimes I'll lay down on the bed and listen. But what was being said in this book, there wasn't concentrating necessarily on anxiety or anything like that. But it did touch upon the subject. And it was a statement that was made, which really grabbed my attention. And the statement was, apparently it's a famous statement. I've never heard it before, but is probably more in cycled psychology. places I don't know. But the statement is seperates don't get ulcers. Or zebras don't get ulcers. As in stomach ulcers I kind of my ears pricked up a little bit like what were they talking about? separates don't get ulcers. And then she explained the lady that was reading the book that she wrote
said please don't worry about stuff. They deal with it. When it happens, their fight or flight was his flight isn't what separates men are not going to take on a lion and have a fight with a lion.
That sense of urgency. You know we're all the muscles, the blood moves from the stomach to the muscles and you know the adrenaline kicks thoughts and that tunnel focus of getting the hell out of there. away from that lion only happens when a lion turns up. Doesn't happen with the time and that's the analogy. In the sense of the difference between a z I'm gonna say Zed prop because that's how I pronounce it. So we pronounce it in a But I know that other countries may call it zebras. So I just,
I can't keep changing it. So I'm just gonna say zebra. That's why I said, bro is compared to humans in the sense that we have that fight or flight response kicking in when we don't need it. Even people that don't have issues with stress or anxiety or panic,
I'm talking about the whole population pretty much in the human, not everybody brother. Thinking about what if worrying about stuff that might happen?
being ready for something bad to happen when there's not necessarily evidence that it will. And I know that that level raises a heck of a lot with people that are struggling with anxiety and stress and panic. Me clearly it's much, much higher level.
But as I said, in the past, on these recordings, when I had the panic, the panic attacks. My main worry, the main thing I was scared of was having panic attacks. In fact, I could pretty much say, that's the only thing I was worried about. I thought I was gonna die as well. Even though it was a panic attack, and I knew that was a panic attack. And I got medical advice got checked out, and was told that was fine physically.
And it was just a panic attack. Just that word, just it's very dismissive. I said it to myself. It's just the panic attack.
Well, if I'm dismissing my own feelings, why would I expect other people to take them seriously? So I started to think what if we became more like a zebra? Just the idea of a swan thinking. I don't mean physically. I mean, just that part of the brain that zebra has. It's not worried until it needs to be. Now I've known a lot of people that were very relaxed, very experienced meditators. I was involved in Buddhism for a long time and I've met some people that you think that nothing would faze them at all. Why not? Why wha knows was some of those people is there was zero urgency even at times when a bit of urgency was possibly required. Not in an emergency situation but just almost like the going slow motion. An odd wonder if they were actually as separate the if they saw lion, they might not actually run which would mean that get eaten. So though, being really chilled down relaxed and calm, practically vertical, may be an ideal goal for some
people. Because I think it's that thing of you know, when you're really hot
let's say in a summer Rarely in the winter is, in the summer, you really, really hot. And the idea of being covered in ice cubes actually seems appealing, when in reality being covered ice cubes would probably be horrible. You know, it might be nice for a second. But when you really cold, it might be outside the idea of stepping inside a sauna. And just
thinking all stainless sauna for hours, you wouldn't want to, once you go in there, he kind of would be too hot. So it's as if our brains want the complete opposite.
Which isn't really logical. It's not really what we want. I'm I'm suggesting. So the idea is, if you're extreme stress, extreme anxiety, the idea I used to think this, I just want to be
completely relaxed all the time. That is not useful. Being able to relax at will, is a great skill to have. Also, being able to, you know, act quickly, also is incredibly important. For example, if you're, if you see someone crossing the road, and there's a car coming, shout into them to move or they're in front of you grab them pull them out of the road. quick reflexes can be very, very useful, slow reflexes flexes, not so much sometimes. So this separate mind. And it's only the part of the mind. That part the worrying part. In fact, doesn't worry. on reality, zebra acts and responds based on what is actually happening in that moment. So of course, there wouldn't be much good for planning or preparing. So we've got the capability to prepare ourselves, which is a great skill, but a useful thing to be
able to do. When you connect, worrying to worrying about all those things, that probably one ever happened. I just fought about it, you know, I could spend the next 30 years of my life walking on the pavement scared, really scared that a car's gonna drive onto the pavement and run me over. That could be my
and just have an awful time every time of walking on a pavement for the next 30 years.
Or I can not care. even think about it not even give it any energy. If one day a car does come on the pavement and run me over,
don't see it then or if I see a car coming, then I can act then I can put all my energy into that.
But to just be continuously thinking as I have in the past on public transport and stuff something bad's gonna happen when big chance. There's no there's probably more chance of winning the lottery a few times in your lifetime, then being in a train crash
or bus crash course they happen every now and then. So rarely. So I wonder what Cipro would feel as they're walking down the pavement. no concern I imagined. be wondering why everyone's staring him. To have that lack of fear actually appeals to me. I think it's good to be cautious at times. How do you find the balance? I'm talking about a separate mind a separate brain. I could talk to you about a favorites brain, or dog's brain. A dog will happily run around the road run around the streets, in fields, completely unconcerned about anything. Don't care about the traffic because they don't know about the traffic.
And most of the time, they'll come home safely. But they're not worried about that kind of stuff. Kind of in the moment, loving and favorite. I've got a fair, called Andre is not interested. He doesn't worry about anything. I don't think I'm not a mind reader. But I've been studied in for four years. It's been a little psychological project to study in his behavior, his responses. I don't think there's any worrying in him. There's no panic. There's no fear. Doesn't have fear. Don't even that makes him jump his motorbike motorbikes. You know, they're really loud motorbikes that offer like a big bang. That makes them jump. to things like thunder fireworks, none of that stuff even affects him
doesn't even wake him up. Not scared of anything. This will lie him. He probably try and fight the lion. He will last long but it's not scared. So we know why that's almost ridiculous. Um, you know, being fearless. Is could be dangerous.
walking across the road without looking is a stupid thing to do. For anyone. You need to look before you cross the road. Just preparation but without fear. I'm not scared when I cross the road. I don't expect the car to hit me. Because I looked before I cross and there's no reason the car would hit me. The idea the zebra only act in what it needs to
actually enjoying itself the rest of the time. feeling relaxed the rest of the time. Not worrying. Imagine what that would be like to not worry, too literally, to not be concerned about stuff that may or may not
happen. And the only things that you actually focus on in the future are things that you want to happen.
The nice things and that's it. only focusing on the things that you're going to enjoy happening. That would change the way you think about things. change the way you feel physically inside. You can test it now just imagine in your mind, and think about tomorrow, I think about the nice things that you want to happen.
focus solely on the things that you'd like to happen, things that you expect to happen,
that you're going to enjoy, you're going to appreciate and just focus on those things. Notice how you physically feel. Notice how it changes the way that you feel inside how easily your emotions transform into something different from stress and worry to something could call it positive. Definitely closer to reality. Because reality is, if you expect things to go well, they're more likely to go well. That's just the way things are. If you meet someone for the first time, and you are told all these wonderful things about them, you're going to be pleased to meet them. And you can be friendly to them and they're gonna be friendly back to you.
But someone fills your mind with all these negative things about this person, before you even met them. You're gonna feel very differently about them. When will you probably won't even want to meet them. When you do meet them. You possibly won't be very friendly, like minimum friendliness. And they possibly will respond with minimal friendliness and you'll think or they're not very friendly. That's right what they said about them. Just reminds me years ago went to it was a film I wanted to watch. and friend of mine saw it before I did. And he told me all these negative things about it, telling me how rubbish it was and all this stuff. I want to watch that. I didn't enjoy it. That might be maybe I'm very easily influenced possibly but regardless of that, it tainted my experience, because that negativity clouded my own judgment of just watching the movie and decided for myself and in reality, wanted to watch it and I was preparing. I expected it To be funny, I expected it to be good. Having this little, my friend whispered, whisper in my ear but saying, all it's not very funny. It's not very good. It's a bit of a letdown
had an effect on my experience with that film. Another thing I remember, I still work in a comedy club. And I remember seeing more than one occasion a few times, not that many times, but the few times, I'd see a comedian on the Friday night and a Saturday night.
One particular time I remember this comedian went on stage on a Friday night. And basically booed him off the stage. The audience and I thought he's rubbish. Absolutely rubbish. Saturday night is back on stage, different audience. Same club.
One of the best gigs have ever seen. Same material. If I hadn't seen the Saturday night. I don't think anything that anyone could ever say. Would it changed? My opinion? Wow. So I just heard a bunch of birds. Sound like ducks.
going past geese. Sounds weird. So we're influenced or at least I am. And I think other people are too influenced by
one off situations. But one off learning, which can be what a panic attack can be a phobia.
Do something once. Maybe it doesn't work out. And you think are ourselves always going to be the old saying, isn't it you never get a chance to make an another first impression, or first impressions last. First impressions only last if you never make the person again. Because nobody is how they were when you first meet them. To get to know them, you get to
find out more about them. So I wonder what it would be like if we start to think that way about our own experiences, things that maybe we just done once, and we've generalized. Perhaps we haven't given ourselves an opportunity to correct it. To correct I experience the same as our the way I did with that comedian. I saw him on the Friday. I saw him on Saturday.
I was looking forward to seeing him on Saturday. But I was working so I had no choice. And it was brilliant. I really couldn't believe it. So he had a chance to make a second impression. That Friday night, wiped out it's just the deciding on complete Lee wiped away Friday night. So I wonder what has happened since some of those experiences have maybe left a lasting impression. That's maybe contributed towards anxiety, stress panic. What other things have happened since then diarchy when you focus on them, these positive experiences because we all have them. Actually, when you focus on them, you realize that the generalizations to give made about yourself just that generalizations not fixed in stone, it's just general. And generalizing is something's really useful in life. It's also very unhealthy at times. very limiting at times, especially when we're at generalizing is getting in a way of our own happiness
cetera, drinking water out of the pond wherever we've always friends, I guess, that might not all get all of each other, but I'm just generalizing. And Elian turns up, and they all you know someone shouts in only Bob, there's a line over there. And he says rk, let's go straight away. Bang, run.
As soon as they will stop running. But just go back to what they're doing. Worried about the next time they see a lion, they're not concerned or stressing about the last time they saw a lion.
That happened. And thinking about it isn't gonna really help them unless they can learn something from it. I think in my situation, I think if I was going to be separate, make sure that I was always standing next to someone that could run slower than me.
That's just the way my brain thinks. That's bad. Imagine having that mind though. That mind where you're not concerned about stuff that hasn't happened. You're not worrying about stuff that has left with what's happening now. And so on. Someone might say yeah, but if all we're doing is focusing on this moment, then
I submit, you know, it's a bit boring. It's a bit, you know, sounds a bit. Dad's a bit tedious. And I'm not saying that actually. All of us have got huge numbers of nice memories. Even if we pretend we don't, we do. I had a fairly rubbish childhood at times. Really bad at times. But recently, I've been getting in touch with the reality of the fact that there was some really good times as well. Christmas when I was a kid when I was between ages and seven and 14 or wherever we're at Really good. Christmas time was great birthdays were great. Bonfire Night, Guy Fawkes Night, it was great. When it was snowing outside, we had fun, do igloos. When it's really sunny used to go down the beach, we had good times,
I think back to when I was 16. Working in a chip shop. And for years, all I focused on was the negative part of it.
I actually, I had some fun times. I was just starting to go out to pubs and drinking,
getting a bit tipsy, singing in the street, making new friends dreaming about the future. Think about how wonderful things will be to even then going through. Because even then is my mood swings were up and down and
but thinking about nice things for the future. And it's an obvious statement, what I'm going to say
is so much bad. And we're nicer than thinking about imagining crappy times for the future. And what is the point in that? Because we can't change the past, obviously, we can change our perception of the past. We can focus more on those nice times from the past. And there might even take writing down and list of things that happened that you liked, that you enjoyed my business school and my beaner club you went to one of my really nice memory I've got was when I was doing karate, and one of the the adults because a kid one of the adults was getting married. And he asked me and another kid that was there to hold swords up in our in our full krygier to hold swords up, crossed above the church as they left the church and had photographs taken of us. I loved that. Loved it brilliant. When I was nine hours on a television show, the whole of my school was loved singing songs, great fun. Getting my gradings in karate, always got a first class pass. I loved it. I feel so good. And there's so many, especially at my age 49 I've got a lot of memories that I can tap into. If I just put the energy. And if I'm willing to do it. You're listening to this you may be you may you might be 90, he may be 20 you might I don't know, any age in between. It could be younger than before generally got memories of the past that are nice. It's about focusing on things that we like. So if you're about to go to a restaurant and you know you're going to say Chinese restaurant tomorrow night with someone that you like, or maybe it's a work out in or friend's family wherever and you thinking about or food you're going to have
I'm fairly certain that you're not going to be thinking about the food you don't like when you think about ordering a pizza. You know thinking about the toppings that you don't like because it wouldn't make sense It is denied. It just doesn't. It's not it's not just it isn't logical beer just probably wouldn't happen.
Automatically wouldn't happen. So when you think about the future, even I mean, it's all made up isn't that the past isn't even real. It's been proven that our memories of the past aren't correct uncorrect we remember some of it, we don't remember all of it.
And some memories get mixed up. So, future it's imagination. That's all it is. So if you think if you can read a book,
you choose a book to read by an author. What do you choose? Doesn't have to be fiction, it could be nonfiction. Educational, it could be anything you choose. I'm just guessing SP choose something that you like. You choose a subject that you're interested in. You choose an author that you like to read, let's say some people like to read Stephen King books, or the Harry Potter for you know, books. You choose something that you know you're gonna enjoy. You don't just choose a random book. And think about memories. You know? If you read a book, by trying to think of an author off the top of my head, but let's say Sue Townsend, who wrote the Adrian mole books, if you read one of her books, he didn't like it. Was the chances of you buying another book by Sue Townsend?
So there's a memory that you don't like? Why? Think about other memories that are similar? Why would you read another book, from the same author that you didn't enjoy that book for? You know, the one you read? didn't like it? Why waste your time reading another one? Well, that could be good. But generally, if I read a book by an author, I didn't like the book. I wouldn't read another book by them. I think it's a standard kind of recipe for choosing a book.
And if he was going to write your own book, you're gonna write your own future. Would you write a lot of crap? Would you write a load of horrible stuff happening? Would you write nice things happening? You're going to write your book, and whatever you wrote in it is going to happen next. It's going to happen over next year, it's going to happen over the next 10
years, the next 30 years. You're not going to add you know, put illness in there. Are you not going to put in catastrophe and things to be concerned about things to worry about. You can make yourself a worrier. You're going to add panic attacks into that book. That story into that future. Or you're gonna make it really positive. Positive for you. Where things work out really well. Were you happy? Were you enjoy your life free of unnecessary stress or anxiety, free of panic attacks. That stuff's in the past. Because at the moment, it is in the past. It can't be anywhere else. Everything is in the past. The only thing we have right now is me talking and you listening at this moment. All those memories are gone. If you think about the memories as a DVD collection of movies, or television shows. And if you're like me, you've watched a lot of television. A lot of movies, over the years, I've watched 1000s 1000s of movies, and millions of hours of television probably. So when you think back, in a sense, you bring out the library, your library of DVDs are going to watch, I'm going to watch back and you know,
every day for an hour, you're going to watch one movie. The one hour and a half, two hours, wherever. So every day
in the future, you can watch one movie from the past. Whether it be Naked Gun, Titanic, wherever, and you got a choice of all the movies that you've ever watched?
Are you going to choose a movie that you didn't like? Often the answer is no. on that one. You're going to choose a movie that you enjoyed the first time around.
And I slam memories. But some so many choices. So many things have happened. To a choice of things to think about. What we think about affects how we feel. And how we feel affects how we act, which affects our future. Happiness. So if you're going to a party to go to a wedding to go to. And it's not really your thing, I'm not a big fan of big public events at all. If you can write a little story about how it went.
Wouldn't be more enjoyable to write a nice story. Especially if you knew that what you wrote was going to happen. you'd write something nice when you went there feel confident, feel relaxed, had fun. dealt with everything easily. was surprised at how will it when
read in a book view a while back? Is from an author called Yellen, Irving Yellen. And they said it wasn't his quote be quite a quite a different someone else. If was if you came back if you had to come back and relive your life, and you knew million percent, that you're going to have to come back and relive your life exactly the way you live at this time.
How would you spend the rest of your life I kinda had to read that sentence a couple of times before it really sunk in.
Because on a on a kind of a basic level, firewall, do this and I'll do that and then I thought, Wait a minute. You're going to want to enjoy the experience. Make as many wonderful experiences and be happy Happy to relaxed. Not going through trauma and stress. Worrying about things will probably never happen. Yeah, I think it's quite a nice, quite a nice idea. Your future, my future all of our futures, it's up to us. That don't mean that in an unrealistic way, I can't get up tomorrow and hire a private jet to take me to Dubai. I can't do that tomorrow, I know that. I could imagine I can do it, and approval quite nice. But even though is unrealistic, it's a hell of a lot better than thinking on a gap tomorrow, and I'm gonna feel crappy, and I'm going to get a bill come from the door, is gonna ask for lots of money in. that's unlikely to happen as well, to be fair. But what makes you feel better in the moment, as you think about it. I'm not saying that we should all be fantasizing about stuff, unrealistically glorious things by if we spend enough time, fantasizing about extremely horrible things, that are never going to happen,
then the only differences you're going to feel happier. Let's still a fantasy. But you'll feel different. Lee, than you did before. Starting to plan the future, the future that you want.
A future work doesn't have stress, or anxiety or panic. Because you've done that you've been there. It's boring. It's boring. It's not interesting. It's not exciting. anxiety, stress and panic is not exciting at all. It's painful. It's boring. And we're sure that you, you can't import with any more.
I can't I don't want that stuff no more on feel relaxed. Don't expect to feel relaxed the whole time. That's not realistic.
I want to be able to deal with things. I don't want to be able to look forward things. I want to think about the past. Choose something that you want to think about. Lots to choose from. Just like all those movies that you've watched in the past. You wouldn't keep a collection on a shelf of stuff that you didn't like, what would be the point of that.
There's a reason why people keep photo albums of happy events, family events, birthdays, weddings, christenings, all that kind of stuff. Christmas or whatever. Don't have pictures of funerals. Don't ever Oh, this is grandma's funeral. Yeah, this is just as the
as the coffins lowered down. zone a hospital bed as she's dying. No, we don't have pictures
like that. We have nice pictures. We want to remember nice things.
Doesn't mean that horrible things don't happen. Of course they do. doesn't mean we need to focus on that stuff. We got all those movies that we enjoyed watching. Because photo album, sin our mind, but it's more than any photo album has ever been grated. more pictures, memories
of nice experiences first times of doing things, the first kiss the first dance the first time you drive your own car, maybe the list is endless, and it's personal for each person as
well. So let's maybe test being like a zebra. When it comes to stress, worrying about things. Let's leave it to when it happens, and deal with it
when it happens. Maybe test it out. Test it for a day, test it for a week
to see how it feels. I'm going to do that. See how it feels. See how you feel differently embrace the zebra. And that's why zebras don't get ulcers, because they don't worry about stuff. They don't need to. So that brings us to the end of another of these recordings. I hope to see you well. Then I'll speak to you very soon. Remember to be kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. Lots of love bye

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