Hello, and welcome to Jason newland.com. This is relaxation, hypnosis for stress, anxiety, and panic attacks. I need to shorten the title of this thing seems a bit too long. Anyway, my name is Jason Newland, please only listen to this when you can safely Close your eyes.
Now I'll admit to you that I actually give more thought, Yeah, probably give more thought before making a recording on this podcast than on any of the other ones that I do. I do a lot of sleep, sleep recordings. The let me bore you to sleep, the sleep hypnosis, whisper thing.
Sleep hypnosis weekly. And other things I do for this, because it's so focused, try and either before beforehand, so topic. This recording is going to be about caring. And that's it. So I'm going to continue talking about that, and maybe offer some ideas and just see what comes up. And when I say caring, I'm talking about not caring. Which might sound like a strange thing to say. But where I'm coming from with this is with anxiety or stress. With panic attacks, there is possibly way too much energy put into caring about situations about things. Because in order to worry, you need to care about the thing you're worrying about. In order to be
stressed about something you need to care about that thing that you're stressed about.
With panic attacks. part of the process of having panic attacks and anxiety attacks is to expect to have
it's one of those weird conundrums I think where logically Why would you expect to have something that you don't want to have? Because by expecting to have it you'll give your unconscious mind kind of given your unconscious mind the instruction to have a panic attack. Because that's what you think about because your unconscious mind can't really tell the difference between negative and positive. It loves you wants the best for you wants to do wants to do everything for you. When it does, you know, your heart pumps, blood flows around your body. So much goes on in the unconscious mind. Not all so much. When it comes to the stuff that seems unconscious, like panic attacks, it seems like it's coming from your unconscious mind.
Because I don't know about you but in anytime I had one. It didn't feel like a conscious thing. It was almost like having a pain in the stomach. Not something that I caused myself. Not something that I could control.
Of course you can take medications reduce the pain or go and see a doctor, you know that kind of stuff. But we've got to go to the toilet, sometimes it's what's needed. But all these sort of things out of my conscious control. And of course, panic attacks are in that category. Yet, yet yet yet, this is the the addition to that panic attacks are affected by a conscious thinking. And the first thing I think to say about this is it's not about blame. Get out right out of your head. No big fan of blame. not blaming myself or blaming others don't see the point in that is just, we can learn. Take responsibility for our own actions, but blaming, blaming guilt. I think guilt can be replaced with regret. Rule done stuff that we're not perhaps proud of in the past. Maybe her other people maybe didn't mean to, but the result was
the same. So instead of living a life of guilt, you can have regret for what I did. For example, I can add regret for it, and learn, learn from it. To never do that, never to repeat that behavior again.
And although this isn't about that, this isn't about regret. I think it's important to nip that stuff in the bud when it comes to feeling guilty about stuff when it comes to blaming ourselves. Because blaming ourselves or blaming other people doesn't help is just is just poison, which is poisoning ourselves with hatred and anger and all that stuff. But again, I'm not going to go into that effect, because it's more it's a different subject.
But this idea of what a conscious mind, we think about has a huge effect on our unconscious mind. And I know I've given us a lot of for
and coming from a hypnosis background 20 was it 21 years now nearly 22 years that I got involved in hypnosis.
And I never before in the past, I never gave enough credit to the strength and the power and the influence that our conscious mind has on our unconscious mind.
Because you know when someone's got let's say they've got an issue. They go to a hypnotherapist and the hidden they expect the hypnotherapist or they want the hypnotherapist to talk to their unconscious mind and to make changes ask the unconscious mind to make changes. They might not kind of know the ins and outs of it but that's kind of what the processes
when you think about it. In reality, we are our own hypnotherapist. Always they're talking our mind is always talking to our unconscious mind. But parents who have never realized it before. I've been very aware Over the years of things I've watched on television, audios have listened to things I've read in a newspaper. Things that other people say and how I'm maybe influenced by those words that other people say.
I never thought about what I was saying outside of self harm in internal dialogue. And by that what I mean is, if it's blatant, if it's something like telling myself that I'm ugly, and no one will ever love me in that kind of stuff, then that's an obvious thing that I need to address, like, wait
a minute. This is just harmful. You know, and I've said in the past, in other recordings that I've done over the years, and I've said it to clients, when I was a counselor, these things that you say to yourself, would you say that to a small child? Would you say that to your, to your little baby, your little child, your niece, your grandson? You know, whoever? And everyone says, No, because it would be abusive, it would be cruel, it'd be horrible. Why would you say it to yourself, because by saying it to yourself, you'll have a more of an effect than you would on that child. Because it goes in this, this, there's nothing blocking it. Although it could have a really bad effect on the child as well, of course, if it was repeated and stuff, but and that's where it comes in, isn't it where people, they hear something over and over again, they start to believe
it, which is the benefit of this, these recordings, the relaxation, sleep sessions, wherever it is, I'm doing this repetitiveness of it. And as well, so the variety, the variety, if I can say the word. So it's not just listening to
the same recording, it's lots of different recordings with a guest the same message just presented in a different way.
So what we say to ourselves, inside our mind, what we think about, there's not even so much about saying it as in a sentence, like internal dialogue, it's what we think about what we are expecting to happen. And in my last recording, I talked about the go into an appointment, and expecting it to be terrible. And it was terrible. I expected myself to get stressed and I got stressed. And some of you may think, Well, why am I listening to you then? If you got stressed at this appointment, and this is a an audio podcast to help me to reduce my stress and anxiety. Well, the answer to that is on a human being. That's the first kind of quick answer. Doesn't matter how, how old you get how well you get is to allow to feel stressed. Sometimes it's natural is to allow to feel anxious, sometimes it's unnatural. Nobody would be listening to this. If occasionally they felt a little bit anxious. Or they had an anxious at a job interview. And after the job interview, they fought all that was that was a very anxious situation. But if they don't normally feel anxious, they probably potentially wouldn't be listening to an anxiety or a stress relief session, recording podcasts, whatever you want to call this. So just reminds me when I had I had an ear operation when I was very young, about eight just before I was eight years old. I was partly deaf in one of my ears, and I kept having to earaches. And then I tested my ears eventually. And I was partly deaf. I don't know what level of deafness but it was, there was deafness there anyway, had her heart to hear it in one of my eyes. So I had an operation. And after the operation, I remember this for about a year later, of sitting there and my dad said something on I said, Sorry, About what? Or pardon partons pardon, sir. I said to my dad, because I didn't hear I didn't catch what he said, After watching television or doing something else that wasn't, you know, wasn't listening to what he was saying. or didn't know. He wasn't talking. He just said something. Didn't know he's talking to me. So it wasn't listening. And straightaway said, That's it, we're taking you back to the hospital to get us tested. We are allowed to miss hear things. Because we're human. You know, if you've had appendicitis nadji, Appendix owl, doesn't mean you're never gonna have a pain in the stomach in that area. Again. It means it's got nothing to do with your appendix because your appendix on in there anymore.
Even people I have sure we've all heard of phantom limb pain. People can have their leg amputated and still feel pain in their feet. Doesn't mean the legs there as she saw someone using years ago, or another going off topic a little bit, but this is about the whole point of this is accepting what is. And this person came to me being in a motorbike accident seven years before this back in 2007, I think so they'd had an accident seven years before that came to me he'd had his leg amputated. And he said he still felt these liquids in the same position as it was after the crash, which was very badly badly badly damaged. Because he had probably, I think he had a couple of weeks or maybe a few months where his leg was stolen. And they were hoping to do operations and fix it but
they couldn't. He still felt that pain in his leg. Now I could have said to him, you don't have a look. He didn't need me to tell him that.
I could have gotten into trance, do some hypnosis within and said to his unconscious mind. You don't have a leg anymore. But that seems to be they want to dismiss how he was feeling. Because he with hypnosis. He's still listening. His conscious mind still listening. Sometimes you can go very deep and person can be completely zonked out and not remember what's happened. I was getting him involved in the process. So what I did is unlike everyone they'd seen previously that would tell him, you don't have a leg. It's just phantom pain, limb pain. limb pain, however, is just a memory. It's not real. Which for some reason, didn't help him with enough. So instead of dismissing him and dismissing his discomfort, what did is I relaxed his leg. I straightened his leg out. Said I went back to its normal shape. So it's no longer twisted. So even though he obviously didn't have a leg he knew that he didn't need me to tell him that his uncle in his unconscious mind the leg Went back to its normal shape, and was completely relaxed. And became when he, you know, after about 20 minutes, half an hour of talking to him, he opened his eyes and said, off your sofa, so relaxed and the pains gone. So this pain they'd had for seven years, he went away. I said, Come back next week and see her again on he came back and he said, don't need anything else. Okay, I just came back to thank you is I don't need is fine. And he sent me a letter, probably a couple of months later, decide it was still fine.
To do something about not dismissing how we feel, and accepting that we humans, and we are allowed to still feel anxious sometimes doesn't mean we're going back woods to where we were before. You know, I'll be sitting down sometimes, and I'll get the exact same feeling
guys to get at the beginning of a panic attack. It goes nowhere, doesn't go anywhere. Now, usually. I find it interesting just to observe it. Because it's just a feeling. It's literally is just a feeling. It's not a nice feeling. Now don't don't don't enjoy it. It's just a feeling. And it's almost like the signal from a body doesn't go to my brain to start that loop. That continuous loop that seems to almost used to feel like my Drennan was being kick started like a boat engine, you know, those ones that you pull the lever and he kind of gets the engine started, or chainsaw or something like that. That's why I used to feel that my Drennan was doing. By got tested, I got I got tested by the doctors and hospitals. My adrenal gland, everything was absolutely normal level of blood pressure was normal. In fact, my blood pressure has always been really, really good. My cholesterol is a different subject. But that's just because of not as fit as I used to be. But suicide this recording wasn't just about acceptance. It's also about how we care about things. So the first thing, and I think it's so important is to just accept what's going on. Accept the human and accept that you can feel have different feelings. Just because you you might be walking through the park or walk into work. Or it could be anything sitting on a toilet, having a sandwich, sitting on a bus watching television. You might be with your grandchildren or with your loved one or it could be absolutely anything. And you get a feeling of real well being a feeling of absolute bliss, for no reason, seemingly just feels wonderful. You can feel across your chest, across your face your body. It's almost like you're just filled with this sunshine is just filled your body and your mind and it almost goes to a level where you think Wow, this is amazing. Now when that happens, we don't worry to ourselves. Don't think of Got this is gonna happen too often, or this doesn't happen again. Because in reality, he wouldn't want to feel like that all the time. You might initially think we yell would actually I would not if you're going to a funeral. Not if you had to concentrate on something. No, someone was upset and they wanted to talk to you. And they needed your attention. How you could get to focus, if you're just like, blissed out. So it'd be lovely feeling, but it's not always it's just the feeling. It's just just a feeling. And there's something about seeing the feelings, all feelings in that way. That may be useful. Whether it's anger, whether it's physical pain, whether it's joy, happiness, disappointment, anxiety, stress, worry, whatever it might be. It's a feeling. And I know the feelings are connected to thoughts. But that feeling of flight, complete bliss, I've had that in the past. And it's doesn't feel like it's connected to anything. It's almost like it just arose by itself. And I used to feel that way with the panic as well.
Not always. Sometimes it was an obvious trigger is obvious sometimes, at the time, sometimes not until afterwards want to
look back again, for our is another thing, blind spots, we've all got them. They're called blind spots for a reason. And I think it's important really, really important not to beat yourselves up for not seeing our own blind spots.
Because they're blind. But they're not always blind, they do become available at some point.
Next example of that was a client I had. And she said this about anxiety. She wasn't scared again, on a plane. The actual plane bit wasn't an issue. It was the journey to to the airport, which used to cause her panic attacks and anxiety. And this is someone that I saw in person as a client counseling. And I think it was only the third session was at the second session. After telling me about it, and we're talking, I actually did help with some of the and but there's still something missing. And then she said, Oh, yeah, and I don't know how it came up. As she said, I was in a car crash on the way five years ago. Because I think we talked about traumatic stuff. I saw the car crash five years ago, what was that? What was that and she said I was on her way to the airport. Now that seems so obvious when you hear it. But she hadn't made that connection because it was a blind spot. She just hadn't made the connection. Once that connection was made, I was able to do something pretty quickly to change that, and to work with that trauma of that event, which then took away the Panic of future journeys.
So I think it's important. Perhaps I should have just had this recording about this about acceptance. I'm also going to add the other bit that I was going to talk about
maybe I'll elaborate on that another time. But there's something about not caring that can be really useful. When it comes to anxiety, specially extreme anxiety like OCD, where perhaps my talk my clients now, buddies I had another client that had OCD. And they'd turn the tap off
to the point where their hands were bleeding, and literally would damage their hand to keep going back and keep trying to turn the tap off, even though it was already turned off. And I said to this person, what's the worst that could happen? If a tap was dripping? In reality, you know, putting some reality into some logic, because obviously, our emotions and our logical emotions are way more stronger than logic. But if you think about, as we talked about barfs, tar, although we weren't the tap on above, if you call a bar full of hot water, way too hot to get in. So you turn the cold tap on. So that hot water is the emotion. Very, you know, it's like, it's way much stronger than the cold. And you think that you'd need an equal amount of cold if not more, to overcome it to change that temperature, in any kind of a big way. Ports where that happens is. And I'm not an expert on baths. But if you could smell me now you'd realize that just kidding, where am I? If you if you ever done this, you put the cold water in, and you have to watch the cold water. And be careful because it cools the water down really quickly. And then if if the water is going for more than like a few minutes more they should do. The water is no longer above, it's too cold over barfing. It's just lukewarm. Then you have to put the hot water in again. And if it just takes forever, to get that lukewarm water back to bath temperature, no matter how much hot water you put in, I end up having to like empty half the bath in order to fill it back up. Which is a big waste of water. That seems to be what logic logical thinking does to emotional thinking. So emotional thinking has a lot of power, a lot of power. And it seems to I think we've logic it's almost I don't want to think of it in an army competitive way cuz that's that like that kind of idea. But if it was an arm missile, let's say it's almost like the logic has got one arm but emotions and octopus. So it kind of has the advantage. However, it doesn't take too much logic. Change the emotion gradually changes it. But then when it has changed it like with the bathwater, stays changed, it's really difficult to get it back to that emotion that it was before to get it back to the heat of the water that was that it was before. And I'm not talking about emotion as if it's a negative thing because emotion is is just a factual thing. We have a motion and it can be used to your benefit and to my benefit. And the more emotion you've got connected to thoughts and to something that you want to do something that you want to accomplish, a change that you are going to be making like food and more relaxed feeling happier in your life, feeling more acceptance towards yourself.
Have an emotion behind that. Let your unconscious mind know that you mean business. And to take notice, to give it priority, it's almost like you let at the front of the queue of the nightclub don't have to queue up and wait, you just get through straightaway. Because emotion gives you priority gives those thoughts priority. And it can go either way. panic, thinking about having panic attacks, anxiety, so much emotion connect to those thoughts, goes into unconscious mind goes to the front of the queue
gets to go ahead pretty much straightaway because of the emotion behind it. And join conscious mind doesn't discriminate. So if you have that emotion behind, wanting to feel well, wanting to feel relaxed, expecting to feel calm, and loose,
expecting to feel well. And again, those thoughts with that emotion, go through your unconscious mind to the front of the queue and go straight in. Which allows you to make changes yourself, because what you're thinking affects how you feel, anyway, always has always well. Which means by making changes to how you're thinking, or thinking, I think someone says sometimes is thinking on purpose.
Which means you decide what you think. I know it's very easy to get caught up in the
the mentality of not only I've got no control over Why think about
and stuff like that. And there are times that I feel that way as well. But most of the time, we do have control, we have an option to think about stuff. To think consciously about what we want, not what we don't want.
You think about what you want. with emotion. Again, that will go into your unconscious mind, the front of the queue straight in the same as if you focus on what you don't want, without emotion straight front of the queue straight in. And your unconscious mind puts it into action. Because if you're thinking last week, I was probably I say probably I was thinking that when I got into this meeting, filling in the form, I was gonna feel anxious. I pretty much had that emotion behind it went to the front of the queue straight in to my unconscious mind. And my unconscious mind saw that as a request. Oh, so you want to feel anxious when you're sitting there feeling this format at this meeting? There you go. That's what he wanted. That's what you asked for. It's almost like your unconscious mind is literal. No irony. No sarcasm, doesn't understand that doesn't have anything to do with that stuff. It just does. What's asked to do all the things you're asking it to do for you. So on your side after all it is you and your unconscious mind is mostly affected by your conscious mind
by what we think about What we expect to happen, especially when it's something important. And I'll know I haven't really gone into depth about the not caring about stuff, it fits into this, in his sense of
it can go either way you can, there's three ways of looking at something, I suppose when it comes to a situation that may be challenging. Things don't have to stop being challenging. Just because you've isn't, there's no reason why go into that meeting and feeling that forming should be a really pleasurable, wonderful experience. You know, in that reason why I should have done that come home, and written a poem about how wonderful it was. But on the other side, there was no reason why I needed to put myself through
the emotional turmoil that I put myself through. And there's a medium bit, there's another thing I could have done, were
just saying, I don't care what's going to I don't care what the result is.
Maybe limiting yourself to the things that you're willing to have to you know, sometimes there's emotion, things need a huge amount of emotion. And something's perhaps don't deserve the attention we give it. Just like some people that don't deserve the attention, there's a lots of thoughts that don't deserve our attention. So we can just say bancaire, and dismiss those thoughts without dismissing ourselves. But I do have a lot more to say about the not caring bit, but seem to have gone in a different direction with this. Which is something that I do. I suggest not mentioned what I'm going to talk about at the beginning, and then just see what happens.
But I do believe is really, really important to remember the way you think about especially those things that has the strong emotion. So generally what you think about goes into the queue, junk conscious mind.
It might be something like you're thinking about going on holiday, any year two years time? Or Wouldn't it be nice to I don't know anything, would it be nice to get a new car,
or gear could be just a fantasy stuff. And it just goes just goes into your unconscious mind queues up. But the stuff with a real emotion behind it, whether it's negative or positive, goes straight to the front of the queue and gets into that walk into a nightclub you know, I can VIP trying to think because VIP very important person could be a very important problem that needs solution that needs a bit of gentle unfolding by your unconscious mind and your conscious mind together, maybe.
So I guess the message for this is notice what You think about as I will also do that myself. And notice what emotions behind it. Because even those things that don't have strong emotions are still going to be going into your unconscious mind, wherever it is you're thinking about wherever is you expect to happen, wherever it is you want a wish for. So we're going into your unconscious mind. And your unconscious mind thinks that that's what you want.
That stuff with a really strong emotions behind it. That's the stuff that goes in the front of the queue. And john conscious mind tries to give you what you are asking for, because that's what your unconscious mind thinks is, it's a request, even though it may well not be. Well, I had that meeting last week, I didn't want to feel crappy and feel anxious. I didn't want to feel that I needed to walk out. I didn't want to feel those things. But that's the message I gave to my unconscious mind. Before going and during as well. Because actually, during the meeting, I always imagined myself walking out. Which actually was a suggestion to my unconscious mind, to have that feeling of wanting to walk out, which increased the anxiety levels.
So these are just a few ideas. How changes literally know in your hands, but in your mind, you're in your control. Because some things don't seem like they're in your control. We have blind spots, like
I said, and something's perhaps a bit too overwhelming at the moment, in time, that will change. So what you can do is like with a hot bath, you can just leave the hot bath there. Let it Wait for it to cool down. Which always does eventually, just like anxiety and stress always reduces. Or you can start filling it with cold water which would be put in positive things into your mind. Things that you'd like to experience, I'd like to fill thinking about nice memories and all those little bits even though they might not have the same emotion behind them as the other stuff that's in the hot water, the panic, the anxiety gets to a point where there's enough of them to call that water down. So they it's very hard for it to get hot again. So that's really the end of this recording. And I want to thank you for listening. hope that's useful. And I hope you perhaps understand more where I'm coming from with this and realize that are trying to help and you can do more for yourself than I can ever do for you. Just by the way you think just by changing the way you think by thinking on purpose, I think is the I stopped my my saying it's a sign of stuff heard somewhere, thinking on purpose. There's no about taking control. That almost seems aggressive but it's about gently, gently, being kind to yourself because you deserve to be happy. Take care and I'll speak to you soon. Bye
Hello, and welcome to Jason newland.com. This is relaxation, hypnosis for stress, anxiety, and panic attacks. I need to shorten the title of this thing seems a bit too long. Anyway, my name is Jason Newland, please only listen to this when you can safely Close your eyes.