#40 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks (Jason Newland) (9th July 2019)

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Hello, welcome to Jason newland.com. My name is Jason Newland, this is relaxation, hypnosis for anxiety and panic attacks. The whole set out in a stress, anxiety and panic attacks. Such a long title, I sometimes forget some of the words anyway. Please only listen to this when you can safely Close your eyes. And just to let you know that, since the last recording, have uploaded a, I think, seven, maybe eight, maybe less recordings from the past that I thought might be useful, that were made specifically for me for panic attacks, anxiety, and stress. So
I'm not done hundreds recordings for relaxation. And it's on the relaxation hypnosis podcast. And that's on spreaker. It's available on various different podcast hosts
as well. So I do want to upload all of those just a couple that seemed really relevant to what I'm kind of trying to do here. So I hope that they were useful. Comments, remember what I said on those recordings, because I didn't listen back to them, I don't really listen back to anything I do.
But you know, there might be, there might be some repetition. But then repetition is, can be quite a good thing. If it's useful stuff. You know, you don't want someone keep telling you, always cloudy outside, it's cloudy
outside is cloudy outside, because you don't need to keep being told that being told that you will get through this anxiety, you will get to a point where you no longer have the panic attacks here in that repeated whether in those words or in various different phrases that is priceless. And you know what? It's what, in my experience, it's quite rare to actually hear somebody tell me that I'm going to be okay. It's very rare that anyone actually says, you know, Jason, that you're going to be okay. He says, you know, this is a short term, situation, this is this anxiety will reduce this panic attack, it can't last forever, it will subside and he will be okay. And eventually even though there may be regular now they will become less regular. Hopefully with my help, but also you know, that old phrase old, it's very, very old, over over said phrase at time is a healer. But it's true. You know, in some ways, it really is true. That time off is just another way of saying it sometimes healing takes time. healings, not always instantaneous. You know, if you break your leg, nothing in the world is going to heal that broken bone other than just time for the healing process to take its time to do it. So whether it's a few weeks or six weeks, however long it is that it takes for you to be able to walk on that leg again without the plaster or without walking on. I was gonna say stilts but the opposite wouldn't walk in with crutches or whoever
might take six weeks might take longer might take less. Time itself isn't the healer, the healing is the healer the healing needs time. And during that time best thing you can do and any of us can do is actually be nice
to ourselves, you know, give ourselves a break. I mean my brother years ago, this is a long, long time ago when I was at school, he was older than me and he he fell off his moped and he broke his arm within fall off his he crashed and if any broke his arm and he had a cast on you No one knows proper
you know, the things that put your friends right on and stuff I've never had one of those are broken a few bones but
they don't. I've never had casts. Even when I broke my wrist about three, four years ago, they offered me either a full cast or one I can just
put on had metal in it which wrapped around the wrist. And I could take it off when I needed to because it was in the summer and
the specialist said it was so hot, it was gonna get really itchy and uncomfortable. And he said as long as you keep on most of the time
like it possibly take off at night when I was in bed or your take off if I was just resting it after you know the first few weeks but he didn't let it heal. He was so determined that it was time for his arm to feel better to so active is really he was one of these like superduper physical people that could always won races at school. It's always top of the of everything he did. He was really competitive and really super fit and strong and everything. And he didn't want this broken arm to hold him back. And at one point, probably two weeks into having the arm brace on maybe less than he was trying to prove to my parents he didn't need it on anymore. He was doing press ups. And I just reminds me just makes you think well, not at the time but at the timer for here do more press ups have more pain, but that was because I was kid. I didn't mind him hurt himself. But stuck on it being impatient expecting something now, but it's different. So with a physical thing, a broken arm is painful, but your painkillers and you have it in us, you know, provided it's nothing too serious. It's just it's just a bit of pain and it subsides quite quickly after a few days and you know it's not a huge deal hopefully. But when you've got anxiety and it's like a panic attack full, full in and going on. There is no impatience. Because that's not the way we're thinking because logic and reality doesn't come into this journey. You can have 1000 people telling you balance specialists 1000 people that know everything about the brain and you know stress and anxiety you're saying to listen Bob, if your name is Bob Yeah, this will pass. This is just your adrenalin kicking in and you know your ears. You can't die from it. It's not gonna
it's just very uncomfortable. It's very horrible. To be fat I think horrible even sums it up. I
think it's it's kind of terrifying. Actually. But those who've never had a panic or anxiety attack, they don't understand. Even though we all experience it differently, I've spoken to many people that have had anxiety attacks. And he probably notice I use panic attack and anxiety attack, I use the same term meaning the same thing. It's
spoken to many people. And there's a lot of similarities. But then there's that level of, you know, some people managed to continue even when they're in the throes somehow. And I managed to do that a few times when at work,
when why perhaps should have done was, at the very least had a break, gone outside, explain what was going on to my manager, and just took a break or gone home. But then you got that problem of, he looked fine. Physically from the outside, to same with any kind of mental illness or disorder or, you know, health issue, including things like pain as well, chronic pain, people look fine. The only perhaps, indication that somebody is suffering is maybe the way that their faces the expression on their face, the way that someone's talking. Because somebody that's going through a panic or anxiety attack, they will not be talking the same as they would do. When they were feeling fine. There's a good chance they'll be perhaps sweating, or there would be even physically moving differently. But I think this stuff is taught to the general public. And I would say it's really important to be taught to teachers, and taught to managers, you know of companies, team leaders, not just in education, but just generally so they can pick up on it. Because then you look after somebody then you might have done might have done work in view for a long time. They might have to have three months or feel free months of work to recover, to you know, get to a point where they feel able to return to work. If you you know if that manager that company is being kind and really caring to the person that's going through the anxiety issues, the stress the what have you, you know, whatever's going on for them.
You feel safe to go back to that place. And I think that makes a big difference. With my last job I had I had all is having anxiety stress, and was also diagnosed with bipolar.
And I started to have been in a depression stuff this is going back 2013 and already been diagnosed bipolar previous today in 2011. So what I did is I told our toggle manager I've been diagnosed I've got I've got depression, I'm being put on antidepressants. But the antidepressants have actually made me feel worse for maybe a few weeks and then I started it just the anxiety really increased. So it's it was kind of a very weird I was going to happen. quite high levels of activity in my brain.
I was all over the place. And it turned out that after taking some time off work, everybody know about it. It is spread through the the office for some reason the I think he, someone
may be the manager told, told everyone, and then he told told everyone in my team and then spread out to other people.
I no longer felt safe to go back to that job. I tried to go back twice. But I just didn't feel that people treat me the way they used to.
Because I was, I was quite good at my job. And I've gone fairly well with pretty much everybody. But, you know, some people weren't talking to me. Some people were a bit too friendly, you know, like treating me or gentle when I'm not, I'm not someone that needs to be treated
softly, you know, kind of like to have a laugh, and I wasn't safe. And I realized I might have gotten off on a tangent here. I think some of these things are necessary to dress to think about and realize that maybe you've been affected by the way that you've been treated,
which hasn't helped you hasn't, you know, being beneficial to your recovery to your and sometimes recovery isn't recovery, it's managing. But I know some medical or mental health experts. First, my situation with bipolar day class, it is recovery. If you're not in a manic state, or if you're not clinically depressed. If you're not in neither of those states, then you're in recovery. See me, the word recovery means that you've healed that you've recovered my broken leg, you're walking around, and it feels fine. That's recovery. But you know, so the terminologies not? I think it's useful. Because something like bipolar, or schizophrenia, or wherever, or this is, the list is endless, not just mental illnesses, but physical illnesses. There's many hundreds, if not 1000s, that are lifelong, like diabetes, for example. So it's about managing. I believe that anxiety needs to be anything lifelong, or stress or panic even. But they can be connected to something else. I know that a lot of people may have anxiety connected to another illness Miss. This is standard stuff in psychology with psychologists and psychiatrists that it's a lot of people that have extreme anxiety issues is like another another thing added to their diagnosis. But there's some people that are dealing with the anxiety, they've been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, which I was back in
2002. November. And at that time, that's that's all I was diagnosed with. And I don't want to say all,
I mean, they hadn't discovered any other stuff that I was, or they hadn't taken any notice of any of the other stuff.
But it can be connected to bereavement, it can be connected to PTSD. I was diagnosed with that as well, from the doctor. I got to the point I go to doctors law, what's he going to give me this time? Honestly, you know, doctors and you know, he's law professors, they have all these names and letters after their name. I think we should be allowed to have that anyone that's had any kind of mental health issues. So you know, bipolar could be BPL And you know, Jason didn't BPL personality was an emotionally unstable personality disorder. So that could be UDP is an anxiety disorders ad. You know, we could just have all those letters after our means make us look like professors.
The thing is, I think it's worth remembering that actually having anxiety can be like a warning to, like your, your body's warning you to maybe slow down. I do believe that when I had the stress, and apparently the first major panic attack, but I had other real big one that the first
big one in November 2009 Yeah, 2002 That was my body or my brain or whatever way of telling me
to stop what I'm doing to slow down. Because it happened journal. Protect like, sales wise, the best week of my life. Sales wise, I broke the water sales record in the company. And spent
all week doing it. I worked long hours. And I was more focused than probably I've ever been in my life
up to that point. And always drinking excessive amounts of coffee. And I was drinking alcohol at night. probably wasn't getting enough sleep. And is felt like something inside my head snapped. Something
broke. And I don't believe that could have happened just in one week wasn't just one week of that it was it built up. Something I think I just didn't listen to my body wasn't taking care of myself. But at the same time, I'm not going to blame myself either. Because I don't see any use in blame. There's no use is of no use. All it does is feel anger, and hatred. And when it's aimed at yourself, what you see is the main thing of fail is kind of to learn from it. And I think I did learn from it. Bob still made similar mistakes since not anymore. But since that time I did when I went and worked in another insurance company
wasn't so much did the long hours, but I definitely got a bit too emotionally involved and my stress levels rose to a point where it was too much. So I suppose you could say what is the point of this conversation? And what am I trying to get to? Well
firstly, don't blame yourself for anything when it comes to this stuff. When it comes to illness. If you someone's diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, you wouldn't blame yourself which or if you had a loved one, or child partner, parents, best friend so whoever who was diagnosed with anxiety or date you don't have to be diagnosed with anxiety to know you've got it. That's one of those things that you go to the doctor and because some people wouldn't know they got x have never experienced it before and don't know what it is. But I think these days there's a lot more openness about it, it doesn't I don't think anxiety has that. The taboo that something like maybe the so bipolar would have a you know is if you look in the papers On the news, and it's very rarely that you'd see a negative story about someone that was having a panic attack or an anxiety attack, or suffer stress is very much, I think that people are quite caring about that. Because I would say, a lot of people can relate to it, even if it's just in a kind of vague way, because I would imagine everybody, you're pretty much everybody has had a moment in their life when they just lost a breath, you know, and felt a bit weird, and now about to do something big, you know, maybe walk down the aisle, or walk their child down the aisle to get married, or to speak in public for the first time, or to go to an interview,
or to attend a funeral even you know. And the first time I went, this is back in 2004 2013. Went to a funeral, I didn't know it was going to be an open casket,
never, never seen, like a dead body before. And I went into shock. Because I wasn't prepared for it. If I'd been prepared for I could have just kind of calm myself down before going in, or I might have just not gone in, to be honest with you. Or I might have come in last and said the backs or never got to see the coffin. But I didn't, I went in first. So I could get a seat. Because it was a Buddhist center. And a lot of people sit down on the mats. But my hips don't allow me to sit down on the floor, I have to sit on the chair. So that's why I wasn't one that I wanted to good space at the funeral, I just needed to find a chair. So I went in, and suddenly I was confronted with this person I knew I wasn't prepared. And I did go into panic mode. And I had an anxiety attack. And I had to leave the building. But it didn't last long. Because
we found a donor about you. When it's connected to something obvious. And when it seems logical, then I was I was able to recover from it really quickly.
So seeing a dead body, in my mind that that's supposed to be shocking. If you've never seen one before, if I just walked in there saw my friend dead, and I didn't blink an eyelid. Then that would shock me. Because I think why? Surely I you know, I want to be affected by stuff like that, you know, means I'm a human being. Maybe not to that level of a panic attack. But I've found over the years that when I have an anxiety attack, and it's related to something like a funeral, or my Nan's funeral, I always read difficult, anxiety wise, but it's supposed to be I guess, I didn't. I didn't care. I would go through huge anxiety during the funeral. Because it was my nan and I loved the daily and I it seemed I knew what was causing it. But when it happened when I was in a bookshop years ago, just looking at book that scared me more because I didn't there was no trigger to it. And I couldn't therefore, because it was no trigger. How it was hard is it felt like it was harder to calm down from.
So maybe there's some times when actually, if you have an anxiety attack, even if you've kind of feel like you've recovered from them and you don't have them hardly ever or perhaps never. And then occasionally you have one and it's instead of thinking all here we go and again, it's all starting again. When's the next one gonna happen? Instead of thinking like that, maybe look at the situation and think Well, there's a reason for that. It's a trigger you're triggered, which means that actually, it doesn't mean that anything is returned just means it was a one off. And actually, maybe loads of people that have never had a panic attack would also have had a very similar reaction. But it would just be called shock with them. It just be call nerves for them. So someone has a panic attack, before going into a job interview. If they've never had anxiety, or panic or been diagnosed or anything like that we'll have any understanding of it. They probably class is the nerves that label it as nerves. And people would call it nerves once they explained it to other people, and it just be accepted. And it will be a one off situation and it be accepted. Like it was natural. And with some people, job interview can be a nervous situation. It doesn't have to be. But you know, these requests. There's ways around that. But I think you get one saying it's someone that witnesses a car accident. They're in shock. And it's natural to have that. suffering, that's what's the hardest part for a lot of people. It was for me with the panic attacks I used to have because they weren't connected to anything. The first one was clearly the first big one because I was hugely stressed or was in the middle of a phone call with a customer. And it was like always outside of my own body. And my brain was thinking of is Don't you know, it's like something else was happening and scare the hell out of me. But when it happened at the funerals, didn't scare me. wasn't scared, I was uncomfortable. very uncomfortable. I wasn't scared. I didn't. I wasn't thinking I'll what's caused this. Because it was obvious what caused what had been the trigger rather. Safin, it's worth thinking that, you know, even though you will get to a point, or maybe you're already there, again, to that point where you have less of those feelings, those feelings that you used to have, or used to expect to have change, because right worth remembering as well. That what we expect is more likely to happen. If we focus, what you look for is what you find more of, you know, it's the same as if you try this, for example, the next time you get in a car as a passenger, and you go on a long journey. Just say to yourself,
I wonder how many yellow cars I'm going to say. And you start to expect to see yellow cars and maybe you see one, I think is one might start off not expecting to see many and you'll see another one. And the more you see, the more you'll
expect to see and the more you notice. Then you'll notice cars that have yellow parts on them may be one of the yellow bumper or a yellow top made one with yellow alloys, wheels or whatever. And you think, Wow, I didn't realize there was this many yellow cars in the world,
never mind, on the motorway. So it's kinda it's not that there wouldn't have been any less yellow cars there. If you have decided to focus on red cars, you just wouldn't have noticed the yellow cars.
B would have noticed a lot of red cars. So it's not that what we focus on. Love magically occurs necessarily. It's just that that's what we say, we focus. We notice what we focus on. And there was a time when I was constantly focusing on every single movement that my body made. Every time, my body my stomach grumbled, I'd start thinking, Oh, no.
Is this what's happening there? Even though before that wouldn't care, just as a slight now, of my stomach grumbling is grumbling, because I'm hungry, or? Well, usually, it's because I'm hungry. There's not any other reason. Normally, I need to go to the toilet perhaps. So as we're thinking about what you focus on, what was not what you focus necessarily to what you expect, but you start to expect those yellow cars, and more come along. But even if you didn't expect them to still come along, but you just perhaps wouldn't have noticed. Because you were thinking about it.
I like the idea of having like a tap connected to your brain, sort of when the stress level gets too much, it just like an overflow, you know, an overflow that you have the drips, usually, it sticks out of the wall of the building you're in, it is an overflow just drips out so there's no floods. And it can't get can't go over the top, just like with baths. That got a gap of nice near just below the taps. So that if the water gets too high, the water flows out. The same in a in a sink is a hose, you know, underneath the taps. So if it gets above a certain level, it overflows it flows out. I like the idea of having that built in to our minds. I say hypnosis part of their being, it's now in your head. And kind of just overflows, so you don't have to think about it. Like a safety valve. Maybe another thing that leave you on this one is it's okay. To occasionally feel a bit stressed. Even if what is this okay anyway, because your human being. But
the idea that if you get something fixed, then it's never ever going to happen again is not always the most useful way to think it's useful to not expect it to happen again.
Because there's there's less chance it's going to happen again if you don't expect it. But I'll give you an example I had my ice dog was partly deaf and one of my ears when I was a kid, I had an operation. And whenever I after the operation someone perhaps when I was at home, my dad would say something and I'd say what, or probably pardon nothing. I probably was a bit more polite back then. And my dad is big. It's a that's it. We're going taking him back to the tech to the doctor's operation clearly didn't work. Now my hearing is fairly okay. I don't always catch what people are saying. So perhaps my hearing isn't perfect all the time. And maybe I've got half the hearing in one ear maybe I don't know. I haven't had my ears tested since I was like seven or eight by eight years old. But doesn't mean that I'm now deaf. Not always deaf, but always a lot less is a very bad hearing in one ear doesn't mean it's something's recur. And it just means that, you know, the song has physical pain. And they have. So if you have a broken leg, let's go back to the broken leg analogy. You can still have a pain in your leg without thinking, Oh no, it's broken again. might just be cramp. It might just be the way you slept. You might have bashed it and forgotten about it. Now I'm on proper clumsy to the times. I told you, I fell out lavar broke my wrist off bashed my legs or bashed my shoulders, my arms. I don't think any if another one has happened. And then the next day I wake up and I've got a big bruise. And I'm thinking, where did that come from? I don't, I just I have to kind of try and think back. Because there's been times when I've gone into a panic mode, when actually it's just a bruise. Sometimes a bruise is just a bruise. Sometimes a pain in the stomach is just a pain in the stomach. In fact, most time, that's all it is just indigestion or just a bear gas is like saying, you know, most of the time headache is just a headache. I want to say just it's a horrible thing to have is very uncomfortable, can be painful. All headaches are painful and labor is is a headache doesn't mean it's a brain hemorrhage, your brain tumor is a headache. And it's okay to have headaches, it's okay to have stomachache. It's okay to feel stressful. Sometimes. It's okay for that stress to arise. But then you've got that overflow built into your mind. And it can reduce, and you can feel it reduce. And that's a good thing about it. Because that feeling of your anxiety and stress reducing now actually feels pleasurable. So you can get more in tune with that. You can focus more on that feeling. So you start to expect it. And as I've already talked about with the yellow cars, when you expect something, you start to notice it more. I remember when I was learning to meditate. And I used to the thing is I used to say I said to one of the teachers, I said I keep drifting off, I'm counting the breaths or I'm focusing on something that they're talking about. And I drift off. And the teacher said, Well, what happens when you drift off? I said, Well, I'll start counting again. I said, Well, it's good then isn't it? I said no. But I'm drifting off. And the
teacher said, Yeah, but you noticed the you drifted off? Oh, you mean I'm doing good? I said, Yeah, that's really good.
Because you're aware, your awareness is increased, you're aware that your mind was wandering, wandering more, no wandering as in wandering, not wandering. Okay. And that's one of the good things of being able to be aware.
So if you're aware of your stress levels, that's a good thing, because that's when you can focus and notice those stress levels reducing the anxiety reducing, which is a wonderful, wonderful thing to happen because it means your awareness has increased actually means that you're doing really well. Instead of beating yourself up thinking, Oh, I'm still getting this anxiety, I'm still getting stressed and instead of thinking that way, because having a go yourself and being proved to yourself is never useful.
It is A form of self harm, and it's Please don't do. That's all I could say on that one.
Treat yourself the way that you would treat a small child that you absolutely adore. Or an elderly relative that you love to bits, where it's a grandparent, maybe it's a parent, maybe it's your own child. Maybe it's your niece, your nephew. Maybe it's, it's when my case, it's a ferret, my little Andre, I love him warm my heart. And there's things that I probably would do to myself that would never do to him. This, the way I talk to myself, I would never say that to him, and he can't even understand what I'm saying. So imagine saying that to someone that can understand what you're saying, and saying the things that you perhaps say to yourself, those things that are nasty, and like putting yourself down, and I'm not gonna list lots of different things, you may say to yourself, that you don't need me to, you start to notice it. When you notice it, you start thinking, would you say that? To your grandparent? Would you say that to your grandchild? Or your son or your daughter? Or
someone else? Do you absolutely love to bits? Would you say that to your husband or your wife? Or if you haven't got anyone that you can think of,
you know, sort of in your life, maybe you can think of as an example of someone you wouldn't say it to?
Or would you go into a hospital ward into a hospital ward full of really, really sick people or go into gotta know the name of the places but going to song with some really sick end of life? Maybe?
And would you say those things to someone in a bed? The sly in their extremely ill I can guarantee you the word is the answer. That is No. It is that same respect. You deserve that same kindness,
that same loving. And I realize this can be an emotional thing to hear.
Because maybe it's been a while since anyone's told you that you deserve that kindness. And you deserve to be kind to yourself. That is a fact. Too simple, but powerful. And as far as I'm concerned, it is a fact. And nothing that anyone could ever say we change our mind on that.
Be kind whatever that means. It doesn't mean you have to necessarily do anything other than just think some nice things. maybe think about some stuff that you've done in the past. That has been lovely. You know, sometimes you've helped somebody who can be maybe something, but I like to imagine winning the lottery, even though I don't even do the lottery. But I like to sometimes just imagine all the things I do to help other people.
It feels lovely. And I've not even done it. I don't even know if I would if I'm honest.
If I won 10 million, or a million I don't know if I'd give give most of it away. But thinking about giving those two away feels lovely. In reality, I might just disappear and go and buy an island somewhere. But it doesn't matter because this is the imagination. In my imagination, I've got blonde hair, and I'm six foot nine. Doesn't mean it's real. But it feels nice.
I just maybe imagined Something that hasn't happened. That's nice.
Imagine tomorrow, feeling completely relaxed. Whatever you're doing, wherever you are, whoever you're with. Imagine getting to a point where everything is a trigger for you to feel calm
and awake and where, but calm. So when you see yellow car go past that might stick in your head, because I've mentioned it quite a bit. You feel maybe a sense of relaxation. Tomorrow. And let me know this because this is, this is a little experiment or to do with you. And please leave a comment on this podcast, come back to the podcast and leave a comment. If you don't mind. Tomorrow. Let me know if you see somebody who goes out of the house, whether it's to work or visiting a friend or shopping, let me know if you see anyone with a broken leg. Leg in plaster on crutches, crutches, crutches.
Because you'll notice it when you see that person with a broken leg, you'll actually feel relaxed within yourself. And you get a sense of perhaps relief the your next row, okay, maybe.
As well as that feeling of compassion, because compassion doesn't always have to go out to other people, you can have it towards yourself as well.
You know, about sharing that love sharing it with yourself. So I'm gonna leave you on that. Remember, you called the overflow. Now, we're kind of like connected that to your mind. So that's there. And
sort of stress levels can only go so far, and then they overflow. So you don't have to really be too concerned about that anymore. But just think about tomorrow. Think about the things that you're going to be doing. You might have it planned, you might not, but maybe you can plan it. Maybe it can be a fantasy. You might not be going out tomorrow, but maybe imagine a fantasy tomorrow. Something that just feels really nice, really relaxing. Because sometimes all you need to do to feel wonderful. It's just close your eyes.
So that's the end of this recording is gone on a lot longer than I expected I thought was going to be about half an hour, but it's nearly an hour. So thank you for listening. And as you probably noticed, I can talk forever. So this could have lasted for another two hours probably but I'm going to try and I try not to talk for more than an hour. Often. That's enough for anybody at actipro help with. So thank you very much for listening. And just remember to get in touch with those nice thoughts within you that you have towards yourself and all be about I will be back very soon with another recording. And until that time, whether it's tomorrow or the day after. Just remember that you deserve to be happy. Remember to be kind to yourself. Lots of love bye

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