#105 Relaxation Hypnosis for Stress, Anxiety & Panic Attacks - "STRESS & ANXIETY ARE NATURAL" - (Jason Newland) (3rd March 2020)

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Hello, welcome to Jason newland.com. My name is Jason Newland, this is relaxation, hypnosis, the stress, anxiety and panic attacks, please and listen when you can safely Close your eyes. And please subscribe. Wherever you're listening. You can, you can listen to this on lots of different podcast hosts or suppliers, such as iTunes, Apple podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, spreaker, Google Play, I think, a lot exists, or Google podcasts, loads of different places, including the spreaker. Plus, all of my recordings are available to stream for free and to download for free on my website. So that's pretty groovy. So you know, this recording of going back to 2006. He, I really am that old. I've been doing this a while. While so I hope you're well. Hope you're I hope you're able to keep relaxed whenever possible. But you know, I was thinking that do kind of the, the opposite to what you would normally hear in a recording, which is technically aimed at reducing your anxiety levels. Basically, what I'm going to say in this recording is, it's okay to feel anxious. I don't mean all the time. It's natural to have anxiety at times, in certain circumstances. And sometimes feel that having in the past had such high levels of anxiety, that there's almost a sense of I should never have any anxiety ever again. Because I should be all cured from it. And I should be able to deal with every single thing that ever happens in my life. Which is ridiculous. It's a silly idea, isn't it? What a pressure to put ourselves under the idea that we should, you know, be able to deal with everything and never ever, ever, ever feel stressed or anxious ever. If anything that that would cause more stress. Or it could cause denial to the point where perhaps we're not giving ourselves the attention and dealing with it. which could lead to again worse. So an example for me today was I had a bill come in from not a person called bill a financial a financial expectation of money from me to them, which was not going to happen. And the podcast host and they wanted $430 for me. Out of the blue with no idea. I basically overused this service without realizing it and hadn't read the small print
So I spent a couple of hours or three hours nearly online and on the phone trying to sort it out today or yesterday. And my anxiety levels were high. I sometimes wonder, what's the difference between stress and anxiety? The stress levels are up. So maybe that's not anxiety, maybe we should only call anxiety anxiety when it's to do with something that would go in to do something that perhaps we're avoiding doing, because of how we're feeling. But the stress is the actual feeling we have, when we're doing that thing. Maybe? Regardless, I'll just use whatever words, I feel like really, is ultimately it's just a description of a feeling. Which isn't pleasant, is it? And there's so much frustration and worry. So the worry, the anxiety for me really was the more the worry of what if I can't get it sorted? What if I can't get the the amount that they want just dismissed or, you know, come to an agreement or something with them. So that's where the anxiety was, the stress levels are rising up due to me feeling that I wasn't getting anywhere. That's, you know, I just started to feel ill by kept dying. And I got the bill down to $50. As still way more than I could afford to pay, but I paid it. And so do the anxiety kind of reduced because I was no longer concerned about the future. As far as that particular situation was concerned. So you know what, I was starting to think bailiffs are gonna be knocking on my door. How am I gonna get $400? Where's that going to come from? You know, it's just, I just didn't, I couldn't kind of figure out how I was going to how I was going to get it. But once that was sorted, it reduced the physical feelings in my body. Kind of didn't. Anyone it got to the end of it. I felt frazzled. Which is lovely word isn't it? I felt fret I felt burnt out. And I needed to just lay down and be on my own. And that's what I need. I need to be on my own to recover or to recuperate. Some people prefer to be with other other people to recuperate. Some people might prefer to do some exercise. Others might need you know, want to read a book
or what what's your film you know, we've all got our own ways of recuperating from stressful situations. Mine is being on my own. And then quite often laying down the bed for an hour or so.
And I started thinking this fact this this situation kicks in every single time. I have any sort of degree of anxiety or stress. There's a judgment comes in my mind. A judge myself, I seem to judge myself. Why? Why are you getting stressed?
Always more like still getting stressed Are you you're still having anxiety is more really sarcastic kind of voice in my head a little bit.
And there's more to it as I, obviously you're making podcasts, you're making recordings, trying to help people, other people with stress and anxiety,
but you have enough self? How can you help other people? Your fake silo kind of thing that goes on a little bit. And I don't feel guilty is that isn't a fair fit?
Well, no, it's not feeling of guilt. I would say, it's a feeling of feels a bit absurd. And I would be making recordings like this, when I still deal with that stuff myself
sometimes. But it's nowhere near the level it used to be.
You know, for me, I know it's, it's hard, it's probably really terrible analogy, but it for me, it's the equivalent of
being in bed after a terrible, terrible accident in a hospital bed. And further down the line when I'm, perhaps on crutches, or maybe I'm in a wheelchair, I can get around. I'm not long, no longer in the pain I was in.
But I'm trying to think of a decent analogy that doesn't. Just this such a difference. Between where I am now well was a thought I was going absolutely crazy. When I was going through the anxiety, at the worst point, I thought that my brain
to do something physically wrong with my brain. I did, I thought I was losing my mind. And I wasn't.
And no one listened to this is evil. And even though I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder, and you know, whatever, the doctor decided that week, to diagnose me with recurrent depression, you know, as he starts to run out of things to give me I think.
And that's the thing, you know, over diagnosis, I think is helpful. This, I wanted to say, what's the difference when you got the diagnosis? And I said nothing.
Really, I have diagnosis, but the symptoms are still the same. So I walked out a psychiatrist's office with the label, I don't really think of as a label, but with a diagnosis of bipolar affective disorder.
I'm still me. Still the same person I was when I walked into that office. And I didn't cry. It was a big deal, but it wasn't. It wasn't the same as I imagined it would be for someone who just been diagnosed with a really serious physical condition. It just this somehow feels different. It might not be different, but in my mind, how I dealt with it. And because, you know, I was given a diagnosis and almost like, well, this is a lifelong condition. And this is it. You can have medication to maintain your condition to manage your condition. with anxiety. Having stress, having anxiety is on some level, a lifelong thing. addition, just like breathing, just like leading to eat, just like sometimes getting angry emotions, it's natural to have anxiety and stress at times, but not the level, not the unhealthy level. Because that he can't last. It never lasts. doesn't last in the short term, which means it can't last in the long term.
And I really am talking from experience here. And I know that I don't are not wearing your shoes. Unless, of course I am, I apologize, I'd love stealing shoes.
But I don't know what it's like to be you, you don't know what it's like to be me, we don't, we don't really know what it's like to be each other.
But I know what it's like. For me to experience extreme anxiety and stress to be physically ill to be almost not able to function. Actually, not almost, I've been unable to function. And I still get that as part of the bipolar, there's times when I just can't function. It's almost like my whole body just shuts down, my brain just shuts down. Another way to get me to, if you want to increase my stress levels instantly, hand me a big form to fill in. That's a trigger for me a big form, you know, 1020 pages. Even if the information is easy, my brain, I don't know why my brain shuts down. Always has done. And it's not something that I want to happen. It's not something that I'm just allowing to happen. And just, you know, given up on myself, my brain just slows down to the point of sometimes not being able to function until I get rid of that form. And then I can move on. So it's it's a weird one. That is one of my little things. One of my little quirks. In the same way is if if I'm doing something and you was to stand over me while I did it, and watch me
almost like Horomia long, then I stopped functioning. And that might be a universal thing. I don't know.
But I'm not, I don't. Again, that could be nothing to do with bipolar, nothing to do with anxiety, nothing to do with any kind of mental health issue. It might just be a learned behavior from childhood, it might just be the way that I am. It might just be the way that most people are. Who knows.
It's not something that I've discussed with other people. But kind of back to the original title is it's okay. To feel stress. So, okay, to feel anxious. And maybe that should be a question. Is it okay?
Because you may not feel it is. And that makes sense. Because let's face it, none of us want it.
Bar could easily say it's okay to have a headache. And you could say No, it isn't. I don't want a bloody headache.
But it is okay to have a headache. Everybody occasionally has a headache. It's not pleasant. course it's not. Just like everybody occasionally gets constipated. It might only happen a couple of times in your life. But it happens to everybody. Everybody gets a bad stomach sometimes.
You know, everybody, you could say everybody everything, sometimes, which doesn't make sense, but it just, it's okay to just be human. And part of being human is to have
stress and to feel anxious at times. And probably the only reason why it's a big issue
for maybe us, those of us who are listening and me is because of the connotations that come with it, because of the memories because of the connections. Almost all, if you even have 1% of that feeling, where's it leading, because 1.1% of an anxiety attack, or a panic attack is most enough in is it 1% that be mild, mild,
mild stress, very mild. So when you break into percentages, you start to realize that Oh, okay. So you can have 10% of a panic attack. And actually, it's not that unpleasant. In the same way, as if you had boiling water,
you get to you put your hand to the point where you have to take your hand out of the water, because it's too hot, it's scolding your hand, then cut that temperature. So you divide that temperature into 10. So whatever temperature is where your hand can't be in there, because it's just, you know, when you got your hand under the hot tap, when you're washing your hands, and suddenly got a your hand from underneath. It's not damaged your hand. But it's it's not pleasant. And it only lasts for a miniscule of a second and you put your hand down, maybe you stick it under the cold tap running jump into a freezer or something. So then you break down into 10 bits 10 percentages the take it down to 50% of the heat. Would you be able to have your hand in under that tap? If it was half of the heat? What it is, which is impossible to touch
for the answer would be yes on that one, wouldn't it and I'm not talking about our volcano Lachey half a temporary volcano would still be too hot.
I'm not saying now I'm talking about tap, talk about something it's really really unpleasant. Really, that you can't, you know, it's too much to deal with
z to your handout. add enough water. So you know it's all coming out of a wonderful nozzle
and enough cold water through it's half the temperature your hand would go into there easy and fat is probably going to feel warm, as best
as 50% or 10% it's probably going to feel quite cold actually. So 10% of an anxiety attack is not going to cause any problems. The only problems is the anticipation isn't well that's 10% worth it goes you know what what what what what
will actually have an anxiety and stress is natural. As I said earlier, we all know this really don't me.
It's natural. We've all had times in our lives. When we feel anxious, and hasn't been this big major thing didn't affect our life, maybe had an effect on us at the time, in that moment.
And it could have been as simple as going out on your first date. You know, you go into prom, or go into a party, walking up to a boy or a girl, and asking them if they want to dance.
I don't think anybody in that situation, however, young or old, would do that without feeling anxious beforehand.
Even professional athletes, you know, the fastest runner in the world about do the 100 meters. And they're walking up, you know, to the, their little, wherever they call it, when they kneel down.
You're telling me they're not feeling anxious. With those 1000s of people watching, you know, in the guinea audience, millions around the world, their whole career, you know, the next year of money and sponsorship will be based upon this one performance, which often it comes down to it isn't in the Olympics, the 100 meter golden the Olympics can be the difference between being a superstar. And having silver. Now that gold medal is, is a beginner. So that person that knows what they're doing and spends a whole life aimed at that 100 meter, that 9.6 second run. Either long it takes by know exactly what they're doing, and they prepare enough on the duties preparing for that there's still going to be anxious. So I'm not talking about anxiety in the sense of it helps you performance. Because Yeah, a lot of sports people do say that. But I'm just talking generally. Because we're not all performers. You know, we're just asking someone out for a date, or to dance or even putting your hand up to get the attention of a waiter or waitress, or waiter and staff wherever the correct term is. Some people wouldn't want to say anything. Because they may feel anxious, too anxious to do that. And that, but you know what? That might be absolutely no. Normal. It might be normal, is it? What's wrong with that? That's what I'm trying to say. years ago, I did have a firm performed on the comedy circuit for eight years. And without a huge success, to be fair, but you know, I went on stage about 250 times in front of our 1000s over the years. And I've seen his comedy club and was no longer on circuit boards helping out in his small friends club. And I need you to go on stage and just ask whoever owned the Ford Cortina which is blocking the the car park to move it. And I feel anxious. But she couldn't believe that I felt anxious. In fact, I felt possibly more anxious. Doing that than going on stage and
making a fool of myself purposely. So anxiety and it wasn't that was not our performance that was just, you know, just go on and do it and then get off.
So I think I mean, yeah, you could say oh, this is the personal opinion of you. You think anxiety is normal. levels of anxiety are normal. No extreme anxiety. I want to say not normal. I mean It's not healthy, it's not sustainable is extreme anxiety continuously is physically and mentally damaging. It's exhausting. And when I say it's not sustainable, it's not is not it's not something that can. And that's often that's part of the reason why it doesn't last it because it can't last. Because the the energy involved in it to keep those that you know, that was in that constant vibration, he kind of crap that's going on inside you during a panic attack or anxiety. The body can't keep producing it. That energy is not a sustainable, it starts to slow down, it starts to die away. Which is why we wouldn't call them panic attacks, if it was going the whole time. It was happening the whole time, it wouldn't have a name. Like that. And as we all know, nothing is always the same. No emotions always there. Even the most angry people are not always angry. It's impossible to always be angry. It's impossible. to always be happy. As in smiling all the time. It's impossible. I mean, we're human beings with emotions, different emotions. And it's natural to have those different emotions, including anxiety. And I suppose if you think of anxiety is an emotion. The same as anger. The same is gratitude is kind of an emotional feeling isn't It's a feeling
the same as love the same as when you could say a feeling hunger is a feeling.
neediness? Yeah, the need for something is a feeling whether that need is for human contact, or maybe that need is to go for a walk or to have exercise or lay down wherever the need is. It's a feeling isn't it, it's a feeling that you've got that need.
And on a kind of a safe level of anxiety, and stress. It's just part of day to day live in. I guess in a way What I'm saying is to not expect to abolish all anxiety and stress forever and ever. And never ever experience any kind of unpleasant feelings. Because that is unrealistic.
It's kind of I think it's obvious. And also takes that pressure off yourself. When you start, you know, not giving yourself a hard time
because basically your human being with feelings. Perhaps has no reason to feel guilty or a reason to give yourself crap. Because you're a human being and have an anxiety or stress is not a failure. It's not normal, it's not abnormal. You know, it's just it just is and the word normal and it feel like to say well, it's normal, whatever normal is and it kinda gets very light gets a bit confused and about almost Is it is it in so Is it? Is it compliment? Is it? What is it when you use the word normal? And you could say, Is it normal to go to the toilet? Is it normal to feel hungry? Is it normal to breathe? Is it normal to feel the cold in the winter when you go outside? So you wrap up?
Maybe need the heating on the inside? You know, it's, yeah, it's normal, but we don't call it normal duty. Which is accepted for the is? Is it normal to get angry? Sometimes when something happens that upsets us
something doesn't go our way, the way that we wanted it to, or expected it to? is in Is it normal to to feel upset when something happens to someone you care about? A bereavement Is that normal. Of course, it's all normal, but we don't call it normal Devi. We don't call it abnormal, which is accepted.
So maybe we don't have to sort of go down the road of labeling things normal, abnormal, right or wrong.
And I think Saqqara mentioned this before, when you got that door open, or you got there, you know, the the bridge to the car. So what's that called, you know, the what's the code that you know, when they lower the bridge, and you can get over into the castle?
Well, if you just leave it down the whole time drawbridge That said, if you can leave it open the whole time,
instead of just open and low net for the things and the feelings that you choose you want. So you can lower it for the nice feelings, but quickly pull it up in case an unpleasant feeling arises. The thing is, the feelings are coming so quick, different angles, sometimes together. You know, not everything's quite as black and white as being pleasant or unpleasant. We can be a few a mixture of things going on.
And that can be a bereavement. But it could be an inheritance at the same time.
So it's an unpleasant situation. But there's something pleasant happens after that unpleasant situation possibly. Which doesn't change the fact it was an unpleasant situation. And although the two are connected in a way to to several things, to separate emotions. So you can feel look forward to something I still have anxiety about. Remember when I when I had sex the first time my last meal of the joint virginity. And I was petrified if I'm honest with you. I was I was petrified. And the I was I was 19 and the lady was 25 and she was my girlfriend. And I even talked to her about it. I said I don't know. I just don't know if I want to do I'm scared. So this pleasant experience was also had this real anxiety connected to So things are not always quite as straightforward. If you are at university or college school, or just studying whatever you finish, you push yourself to finish that essay. And it might be stressful, and it might be unpleasant.
But the relief when it's done relief when it's done is pretty phenomenal. We can be, I don't know, I can't talk for everybody feels good when it's done. And then you hand it in. Maybe there's anxiety and not knowing what the what the marks are going to be. And the lead up and you got to collect the results. And maybe there's anxiety connected to that process of walking to college or you know, getting the bus driving wherever and going to collect the results. And then you've got the the pleasure when you see the past and regardless of what Mark you get, there's almost a relief as well. release stress relief, because it's done. Even if you haven't perhaps got the marks you wanted. Even if you have to retake it, disappointment and never feeling but also a sense of like I have to my I have to retake it by I'm gonna think about that until we go back in six weeks time.
It's just constant change in feelings, stress, anxiety, pleasure, unpleasant things, pleasant things happiness. I think we start mixing in and seeing anxiety and stress.
In the same way as you see, happiness. disappointment, hunger. Feeling horny. feeling relaxed, feeling tired, needing to go to the toilet. Feeling sweaty. feeling the need to have a shower. Feeling chatty. You know, there's times might surprise you that sometimes I like to chat. But sometimes I've in my life, I've wanted to chat, but really just taught the ears of someone. It's like a need other times of wanting to just want to be on my own and not see anybody. It's a feeling is a feeling, oh, I feel I want to step back. Sometimes a conversation, someone's beautiful, sometime do some pleasant. Sometimes the stress levels rise, because I just don't want to talk to them. Or I'm not in the mood. Or I need my own space. And I perhaps can't think when someone else is talking about something that I'm not interested in. Only talking from my own perspective, my own and it doesn't happen that often. I'll be honest with you, so it's, you know, has in the past. So we start looking at anxiety and stress and joyfulness and sense of comfort, relaxation, optimism. Looking forward to something, feeling grateful feelings, just feelings. I start to get all mixed together. I don't mean mixed together as in one big movie now. necessarily, which is mixed together as in, they rise, they rise up and then they just fall away. They rise and then they fall away the waves of the ocean coming in and then going out again, coming in and then going out again, coming in, and the wave the water doesn't leave us, it never stays in, noise stays out those waves are continuously flowing.
So start looking at you know, going back to that idea of the hand being under the really hot tap.
When you realize that actually, within that tap, you got the cold water, you got the different percentages 10% of that heat has other things mixed in with it. Some relaxation, some optimism, maybe, you know, maybe some excitement, maybe that that anxiety is that you feel anxious about maybe going to a wedding, you know, because there's gonna be a lot of people there. But maybe you're feeling that feeling because you've also got a feeling of excitement.
Maybe you see someone that you haven't seen for a long time when if your cousin's or
maybe you meet someone or maybe this will be a day he go you're gonna take your new boyfriend or girlfriend to this wedding. Or perhaps you just like me, us looking forward to the free food. I love free food and free free wine. I don't even drink this free I drink so love free stuff. So free chocolate I fucking get all the free chocolate. I would be open to get in and out of the doorway. Honestly, I'll be so big instead of my normal, huge size. So as you go these feelings, his feelings. different mixtures of fairness is not just one thing. When you break it down everything has different components. Nothing's just one thing in you know, get a microscope out. Obviously, unless you got one if you haven't got one then don't but if you anything you've got to say well
this television remote control, that's what it is. You know, because that's what it is, is mainly plastic. So
before I got microscope, I have really powerful microscope. Let's start to see that it's not just plastic. That plastic is there's a lot more going on just that immovable object that seems to be solid.
When actually nothing is solid, not really sore just energy. Saw a mixture of things. So anxiety isn't just one thing. feeling happy isn't just one thing. feeling excited isn't just one thing.
feeling disappointed isn't just one thing. Gratitude isn't just one thing. I'm not like go for every single feeling or emotion possible. Have he get the point.
It's not just one thing. Andre running around and doing poos on the floor isn't just one thing, though it does seem to do whenever I'm making a recording, although he's been quite quiet.
So I'll leave you on there as basically now that he's come out to play over levy because he will be one around at a minute. Just Just think about it. It's okay to have feelings. Just it's okay to have feelings of any kind By now my feelings probably going to be of anger towards Andre, for making noise when everything's gone quite squat quietly. But then we'll get down in. And I'll just see how cute he looks. And I think and as we're watching go back into his little bed, I see his body disappear in his tells now gone, I feel grateful that he's now quiet again. So the feelings are always changing. That I actually stayed the same. They're not static. The fluid always flowing. So yeah, that's that's kind of it really. So I know kinda sounds like a weird title for anxiety, stress session recording, to say it's okay to feel stressed and anxious. Or should I put it's natural to feel stressed and anxious? I don't know. I don't know what the time will be. But that's the gist of what I'm saying. But at that time, it would also be, it's okay to feel happy. It's okay to feel relaxed. It's okay to feel. rejection. At times. It's okay to feel excited, it's okay to feel optimistic. It's okay to feel hungry. It's okay to feel whatever you feel. Just a feeling. Just a feeling. And that's not dismissing it, because I'm talking about all feelings are just feelings. The feelings, their emotions, they come in, they go, they come in they go constantly. And if you focus deeply on them with a microphone, microphone, a microscope rather on to that feeling. And you see that there's more going on there. It's not just one feeling, it's a mixture of things. A sense of anxiety or stress isn't just stress. It might be excitement. might be a bit of regret there. There might be a bit of like, you know, happiness. There might be some joy in there there might it could be all sorts of things. And it's always moving. always moving, always flowing. So yeah, again, I've gone on for quite some time. So I'm going to go Thank you for listening. And remember, remember, remember, remember to be kind to yourself. Because you do deserve to be happy. And you do deserve to remember just feelings. They're all just feelings. So being kind to yourself is just a feeling and by acting upon that, but in something nice, wherever it might be. gives you more feelings, pleasant ones. Take care of yourself. And I will speak to you very soon. Lots of love bye

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